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1
00:00:26,102 --> 00:00:27,769
I'm going
on holiday.
2
00:00:28,503 --> 00:00:29,871
To the Europe.
3
00:00:29,906 --> 00:00:31,406
My little Europa.
4
00:00:31,439 --> 00:00:33,242
♪ You know that
I love you baby
5
00:00:33,276 --> 00:00:34,776
♪ You know that
I love you baby
6
00:00:34,809 --> 00:00:36,578
Good morning,
good morning.
7
00:00:36,611 --> 00:00:38,613
Guess what day it is?
8
00:00:38,647 --> 00:00:40,349
♪ You know that
I love you baby
9
00:00:40,383 --> 00:00:43,052
- It's holiday day.
- Europe day.
10
00:00:44,452 --> 00:00:46,721
Packing up the old
les bagages.
11
00:00:47,323 --> 00:00:48,891
♪ Baby
12
00:00:49,457 --> 00:00:51,260
♪ Baby
13
00:00:51,294 --> 00:00:53,828
♪ Baby
Oh ho ho oh
14
00:00:55,164 --> 00:00:56,698
♪ Baby
15
00:00:56,731 --> 00:00:57,766
♪ Baby
16
00:00:57,799 --> 00:01:01,603
♪ You know it's time
Oh yeah baby
17
00:01:01,636 --> 00:01:03,471
♪ You know that
I love you baby
18
00:01:03,505 --> 00:01:05,473
♪ You know that
I love you baby
19
00:01:05,507 --> 00:01:07,276
♪ You know that
I love you baby
20
00:01:07,310 --> 00:01:09,345
♪ Oh ho ho oh
21
00:01:09,378 --> 00:01:10,947
♪ You know that
I love you baby
22
00:01:10,980 --> 00:01:12,781
♪ You know that
I love you baby
23
00:01:12,814 --> 00:01:16,518
♪ You know it's time
Oh yeah baby
24
00:01:16,551 --> 00:01:20,455
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
25
00:01:20,488 --> 00:01:22,425
♪ You know that
I love you baby
26
00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:24,360
♪ You know that
I love you baby
27
00:01:24,393 --> 00:01:25,928
♪ You know that
I love you baby
28
00:01:25,962 --> 00:01:27,897
♪ You know that
I love you baby
29
00:01:27,930 --> 00:01:29,798
♪ You know that
I love you baby
30
00:01:29,831 --> 00:01:31,833
♪ You know that
I love you baby
31
00:01:31,866 --> 00:01:33,568
♪ You know that
I love you baby
32
00:01:33,601 --> 00:01:35,704
♪ You know that
I love you baby
33
00:01:35,737 --> 00:01:37,373
♪ You know that
I love you baby
34
00:01:37,406 --> 00:01:39,308
♪ Oh ho ho oh
35
00:01:39,342 --> 00:01:41,143
♪ You know that
I love you baby
36
00:01:41,177 --> 00:01:42,878
♪ You know that
I love you baby
37
00:01:42,912 --> 00:01:46,514
♪ You know it's time
Oh yeah ♪
38
00:01:52,520 --> 00:01:54,991
- Look, it's not, it's not you.
- Ta!
39
00:01:56,025 --> 00:01:57,893
- It...
- Ta! Don't do that.
40
00:01:59,228 --> 00:02:00,595
I get it.
41
00:02:01,030 --> 00:02:02,431
I get it.
42
00:02:04,266 --> 00:02:07,970
We are a half hour into a
ten day trip around Europe.
43
00:02:08,004 --> 00:02:10,638
And you decide now is a
good time to bring it up.
44
00:02:12,475 --> 00:02:14,576
I'm wearing
shorts, yeah?
45
00:02:15,978 --> 00:02:17,579
With these legs.
46
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,950
I spent about 20 quid
on sun cream.
47
00:02:20,983 --> 00:02:22,051
That's like...
48
00:02:22,952 --> 00:02:24,086
That's ten pound
per leg.
49
00:02:25,988 --> 00:02:28,290
I spent three weeks
growing this beard.
50
00:02:28,324 --> 00:02:29,724
This here beard.
51
00:02:30,226 --> 00:02:31,626
Cultivating it.
52
00:02:32,794 --> 00:02:33,628
Length.
53
00:02:34,363 --> 00:02:35,530
And now you
decide to tell me
54
00:02:35,563 --> 00:02:36,765
you don't like it.
55
00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:39,567
Okay, I'm very sorry.
56
00:02:39,601 --> 00:02:41,470
I didn't know it meant
that much to you.
57
00:02:41,504 --> 00:02:44,106
I grew this beard
because it's trendy.
58
00:02:45,174 --> 00:02:46,509
It makes me trendy.
59
00:02:47,910 --> 00:02:49,478
You're not trendy.
60
00:02:49,512 --> 00:02:52,281
You're just jealous 'cause
you can't grow a beard.
61
00:02:52,314 --> 00:02:53,482
Yeah.
62
00:02:54,316 --> 00:02:55,518
Yeah.
63
00:02:56,618 --> 00:02:57,987
But you know
what I can do?
64
00:02:59,288 --> 00:03:01,556
I can grow
everything else.
65
00:03:05,961 --> 00:03:07,930
What do you mean?
66
00:03:07,963 --> 00:03:12,368
Well, I mean, I just
won't shave anything.
67
00:03:12,401 --> 00:03:15,538
For... the rest
of the trip?
68
00:03:15,570 --> 00:03:17,839
You know, not my,
not my legs.
69
00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:20,076
Not my armpits.
70
00:03:21,177 --> 00:03:22,677
Not my vagina.
71
00:03:26,449 --> 00:03:28,683
But what do you hope
to achieve by doing that?
72
00:03:30,819 --> 00:03:31,887
Nothing.
73
00:03:34,523 --> 00:03:36,058
You're just
being childish.
74
00:03:36,992 --> 00:03:38,160
Fine.
75
00:03:41,263 --> 00:03:42,664
I'm not shaving.
76
00:04:52,902 --> 00:04:54,904
That'll do.
Just a little trim.
77
00:05:18,826 --> 00:05:20,795
Hello, Mum. No.
78
00:05:25,234 --> 00:05:26,635
Bow chicka wow wow.
79
00:05:26,669 --> 00:05:27,869
Oh, stop it.
80
00:05:35,678 --> 00:05:37,546
- What are you doing?
- What?
81
00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:39,915
You're filming me?
82
00:05:39,949 --> 00:05:41,584
I thought that's why
we bought the camera.
83
00:05:41,617 --> 00:05:44,553
No, we did not buy
a GoPro to film a sex tape.
84
00:05:44,587 --> 00:05:46,922
- Then why did we buy it?
- You know why we bought it.
85
00:05:46,956 --> 00:05:48,257
To document our trip.
86
00:05:48,290 --> 00:05:50,526
Oh, brilliant.
87
00:05:54,930 --> 00:05:57,066
- Is that it, then?
- What do you think?
88
00:05:57,099 --> 00:05:59,068
- But I've got a hard-on.
- Good night, Chris.
89
00:06:03,005 --> 00:06:04,173
I love you.
90
00:06:08,210 --> 00:06:09,511
Now you're
putting me off, mate.
91
00:06:10,546 --> 00:06:11,947
You're putting me
right off.
92
00:06:16,685 --> 00:06:18,053
Just me
and you now.
93
00:06:20,122 --> 00:06:21,590
Welcome to France.
94
00:06:22,824 --> 00:06:23,825
Bonjour.
95
00:06:24,826 --> 00:06:25,793
Ca va?
96
00:06:28,330 --> 00:06:29,764
Shower cap
in France.
97
00:06:41,744 --> 00:06:43,379
Didn't think
to put on pants?
98
00:06:43,412 --> 00:06:44,812
I panicked.
99
00:06:56,525 --> 00:06:58,427
Here we are
in Paris.
100
00:06:58,460 --> 00:07:00,729
Bonsoir.
101
00:07:00,763 --> 00:07:02,830
- Oh, bonjour!
- Bonjour.
102
00:07:02,864 --> 00:07:03,966
Bonjour.
103
00:08:20,509 --> 00:08:22,344
Well, Nice seems lovely.
104
00:08:22,378 --> 00:08:24,747
Don't start, Chris.
I'm not in the mood.
105
00:08:24,780 --> 00:08:27,116
- For what?
- For you being a sarcy twat.
106
00:08:27,449 --> 00:08:28,550
Sorry.
107
00:08:30,352 --> 00:08:31,453
Do people actually
live in Nice?
108
00:08:31,487 --> 00:08:33,822
What did I say?
109
00:08:33,856 --> 00:08:36,024
It's late. Everyone's in bed,
which is where we should be.
110
00:08:38,260 --> 00:08:40,329
Should we just start
walking or something?
111
00:08:40,362 --> 00:08:41,397
Walking where?
112
00:08:41,430 --> 00:08:43,031
I don't know,
find the nearest hostel.
113
00:08:43,065 --> 00:08:44,366
What, just walk
in a random direction
114
00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:46,702
- and hope to find a hostel?
- Yeah.
115
00:08:48,337 --> 00:08:50,038
What do you think,
left or right?
116
00:08:51,974 --> 00:08:53,108
Left?
117
00:08:56,211 --> 00:08:57,246
We'll go right, then.
118
00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:26,876
- Bonsoir.
- Bonsoir.
119
00:09:26,910 --> 00:09:28,878
Um, you got a room
for the night?
120
00:09:28,912 --> 00:09:30,078
Nice eyes.
121
00:09:30,914 --> 00:09:32,247
Thanks.
122
00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:33,649
There are tours...
123
00:09:35,184 --> 00:09:36,618
Is that your boyfriend?
124
00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:39,455
Yeah.
125
00:09:45,360 --> 00:09:46,695
It's cozy, innit?
126
00:09:51,567 --> 00:09:52,634
Brilliant.
127
00:10:00,409 --> 00:10:01,710
Lucy?
128
00:10:05,247 --> 00:10:06,515
♪ Lucy
129
00:10:09,151 --> 00:10:09,985
Lucy?
130
00:10:12,287 --> 00:10:13,121
What?
131
00:10:15,390 --> 00:10:18,928
Well... I was thinking,
132
00:10:20,128 --> 00:10:21,296
while I'm up here...
133
00:10:21,330 --> 00:10:23,832
Chris, you are literally
5 foot off the ground.
134
00:10:25,167 --> 00:10:26,001
I know, but...
135
00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:28,570
You can drown
in an inch of water.
136
00:10:29,638 --> 00:10:31,507
What's that got to do
with anything?
137
00:10:33,977 --> 00:10:35,010
Well I was thinking...
138
00:10:36,913 --> 00:10:38,847
What if I do a wizz in the
middle of the night,
139
00:10:40,582 --> 00:10:43,585
and it trickles down into
your mouth and drowns you?
140
00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:47,523
Do you ever think
about anything you say
141
00:10:47,556 --> 00:10:48,892
before you
actually say it?
142
00:10:50,259 --> 00:10:51,460
Not really. No.
143
00:10:52,794 --> 00:10:54,630
Our lives would just be
144
00:10:54,663 --> 00:10:57,065
really long, awkward silences,
wouldn't they?
145
00:11:00,035 --> 00:11:02,838
Trust me, it's just
as awkward without them.
146
00:11:08,210 --> 00:11:09,511
Lucy?
147
00:11:12,814 --> 00:11:13,983
I do love you.
148
00:11:15,551 --> 00:11:16,785
I do love you.
149
00:11:21,223 --> 00:11:22,491
Night, Lucy.
150
00:11:24,426 --> 00:11:25,661
Night, Chris.
151
00:11:30,766 --> 00:11:33,235
Should we get a hotel?
No, get a hostel.
152
00:11:34,136 --> 00:11:35,537
Equality.
153
00:11:39,008 --> 00:11:40,475
Okay, now.
154
00:11:40,509 --> 00:11:42,244
Okay.
I love you.
155
00:11:43,046 --> 00:11:44,613
Bye. Bye.
156
00:11:45,949 --> 00:11:47,115
Um, thanks.
157
00:11:47,516 --> 00:11:49,251
No worries.
158
00:11:49,284 --> 00:11:50,586
Do you wanna
boom-boom?
159
00:11:50,987 --> 00:11:52,087
Excuse me?
160
00:11:53,822 --> 00:11:55,058
Um...
161
00:11:57,326 --> 00:11:58,460
No.
162
00:11:58,493 --> 00:12:00,029
Chris?
163
00:12:00,063 --> 00:12:00,897
What?
164
00:12:03,398 --> 00:12:04,633
The guy downstairs
just asked me
165
00:12:04,666 --> 00:12:06,168
if I wanted
to boom-boom him.
166
00:12:06,201 --> 00:12:07,402
He did what?
167
00:12:07,436 --> 00:12:09,204
Fucking boom-boom
my girlfriend.
168
00:12:09,871 --> 00:12:10,974
Foreign prick.
169
00:12:20,984 --> 00:12:23,086
Defending someone's
honor in a minute.
170
00:12:24,553 --> 00:12:27,155
How rude.
171
00:12:27,189 --> 00:12:28,590
How fucking rude.
172
00:12:37,332 --> 00:12:38,767
Scuzi.
173
00:12:43,472 --> 00:12:45,173
Did you just ask to
boom-boom my girlfriend?
174
00:12:45,207 --> 00:12:46,408
- Yeah.
- Just like that?
175
00:12:46,441 --> 00:12:47,476
Not even
gonna deny it?
176
00:12:47,509 --> 00:12:49,078
Why would
I deny it?
177
00:12:49,112 --> 00:12:50,079
'Cause she's
my girlfriend.
178
00:12:50,113 --> 00:12:51,680
- I want to boom-boom her.
- Stop saying that.
179
00:12:51,713 --> 00:12:53,082
I'm gonna
boom-boom you.
180
00:12:53,116 --> 00:12:54,449
- You wanna fuck me?
- No.
181
00:12:54,483 --> 00:12:55,985
Boom-boom.
Boom-boom you up.
182
00:12:56,019 --> 00:12:57,519
- Are you gay?
- What? No.
183
00:12:57,552 --> 00:12:59,521
I don't want
to boom-boom you.
184
00:12:59,554 --> 00:13:00,722
I want to
boom-boom you up.
185
00:13:00,756 --> 00:13:02,357
- Smash your face in. Kick your arse.
- Kiss?
186
00:13:02,391 --> 00:13:03,258
- Kick.
- Lick?
187
00:13:03,291 --> 00:13:04,393
Not lick, kick.
188
00:13:04,426 --> 00:13:06,194
- Are you guy?
- No, I'm not gay.
189
00:13:06,228 --> 00:13:07,696
It's okay. Does your
girlfriend know?
190
00:13:07,729 --> 00:13:09,865
Say I'm gay again.
Go on, I dare you.
191
00:13:09,899 --> 00:13:11,199
I double dare you.
192
00:13:13,802 --> 00:13:14,904
Gay.
193
00:13:16,405 --> 00:13:17,839
- Get off,
- Get up!
194
00:13:17,873 --> 00:13:20,442
Don't pull it!
195
00:13:20,475 --> 00:13:21,843
Ow!
196
00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:25,747
Oh, my God!
197
00:13:26,815 --> 00:13:29,118
Lucy, he won't
let me go.
198
00:13:31,420 --> 00:13:33,122
Chris, what the fuck
are you doing?
199
00:13:51,074 --> 00:13:52,108
So?
200
00:13:52,141 --> 00:13:53,308
They put a finger
up my arse.
201
00:13:54,877 --> 00:13:57,146
You get into a fight and they
put a finger up my arse.
202
00:13:57,180 --> 00:13:58,014
How does that work?
203
00:13:58,580 --> 00:14:00,248
Oh, my God!
204
00:14:00,282 --> 00:14:01,984
- Are you okay?
- It's not funny.
205
00:14:02,684 --> 00:14:03,886
And they fine me.
206
00:14:04,786 --> 00:14:07,289
- Five hundred euro.
- Five hundred euros?
207
00:14:07,322 --> 00:14:08,958
Well, that's like half
our budget.
208
00:14:08,991 --> 00:14:11,127
- I know.
- It's mental.
209
00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:12,861
Shit. What are we
gonna do?
210
00:14:12,895 --> 00:14:14,796
I think I dislodged
my anus.
211
00:14:14,830 --> 00:14:15,864
Is that
even possible?
212
00:14:15,898 --> 00:14:17,166
Chris, come on.
This is serious.
213
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:18,400
I'm being serious.
214
00:14:18,433 --> 00:14:20,635
Five hundred euros
for a finger up me arse.
215
00:14:20,669 --> 00:14:22,171
And the French
have got big fingers.
216
00:14:23,638 --> 00:14:26,842
Look, I'll see if my mom
can transfer that money.
217
00:14:26,876 --> 00:14:28,911
- You think she will?
- Of course she will.
218
00:14:31,546 --> 00:14:34,150
All right then.
Okay.
219
00:14:34,183 --> 00:14:35,151
Hold on.
220
00:14:36,618 --> 00:14:38,854
Yeah.
Right, brilliant.
221
00:14:38,888 --> 00:14:40,789
I love you.
Love you. Bye, bye.
222
00:14:43,325 --> 00:14:44,559
What's that?
223
00:14:44,593 --> 00:14:46,062
It's all they had.
224
00:14:46,095 --> 00:14:47,163
Oh, give it here.
225
00:14:49,831 --> 00:14:51,333
Well?
226
00:14:51,366 --> 00:14:53,435
She wasn't in.
I left a message.
227
00:14:53,468 --> 00:14:54,904
Oh, great so we just
sort of stand here
228
00:14:54,937 --> 00:14:56,973
and wait until she ring us
back, then, shall we, dickhead?
229
00:14:57,006 --> 00:14:59,574
I left a message
explaining the situation.
230
00:14:59,608 --> 00:15:02,211
Also to transfer 500 euros
into our account.
231
00:15:02,245 --> 00:15:04,080
Said I'd call back a bit later.
232
00:15:04,113 --> 00:15:05,814
I should really get some
credit for this thing.
233
00:15:07,216 --> 00:15:08,217
Dick brain.
234
00:15:10,552 --> 00:15:11,820
You tell her
you got arrested?
235
00:15:12,621 --> 00:15:15,258
It was a message.
I left a message.
236
00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:17,492
Yeah, but how did you say
that we lost the money?
237
00:15:17,526 --> 00:15:18,627
It was a message.
238
00:15:18,660 --> 00:15:20,328
But what did you say?
239
00:15:20,362 --> 00:15:21,530
It was a message.
240
00:15:21,563 --> 00:15:23,398
Do you not understand
the concept of a message?
241
00:15:23,431 --> 00:15:24,566
You're trying
to be funny?
242
00:15:24,599 --> 00:15:26,434
Just had a finger
up my arse, yeah?
243
00:15:26,468 --> 00:15:27,937
Just had to ring my mum
to ask for some money.
244
00:15:27,970 --> 00:15:29,704
If that's not funny then what is?
245
00:15:32,074 --> 00:15:33,642
All right, fine.
246
00:15:33,675 --> 00:15:35,111
What do you
wanna do until then?
247
00:15:36,344 --> 00:15:38,281
- All right, pub?
- Pub.
248
00:15:42,384 --> 00:15:43,886
You know,
I was talking to my mum
249
00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:45,888
and she thinks
that a trip like this
250
00:15:45,922 --> 00:15:47,489
is gonna make us
or break us.
251
00:15:47,522 --> 00:15:48,590
- Oh, really?
- Mmm-hmm.
252
00:15:48,623 --> 00:15:49,926
What about you?
253
00:15:49,959 --> 00:15:51,660
Do you think
same as your mum?
254
00:15:51,693 --> 00:15:54,997
I think that we've been together
for quite long time, so.
255
00:15:56,132 --> 00:15:58,301
I think if we can't last
a couple of weeks together,
256
00:15:58,333 --> 00:16:00,368
we're up shit creek,
really, aren't we?
257
00:16:01,469 --> 00:16:02,737
Right, then.
258
00:16:02,771 --> 00:16:04,207
Let's say we drink a couple
of these bad boys and...
259
00:16:05,007 --> 00:16:06,842
have a look around
this shit hole.
260
00:16:55,790 --> 00:16:57,459
- Orange gina.
- Orangina.
261
00:16:57,492 --> 00:16:58,727
Orange gina.
262
00:16:58,760 --> 00:17:00,196
Listen to me.
Orangina.
263
00:17:00,229 --> 00:17:02,397
Listen to me.
Orange gina.
264
00:17:02,430 --> 00:17:03,933
How can you not hear
that that's not the same?
265
00:17:03,966 --> 00:17:06,735
Allo. Uh, order.
266
00:17:06,768 --> 00:17:10,405
Oh.
Check this out.
267
00:17:10,438 --> 00:17:14,944
We
would like to order some lunch,
268
00:17:15,410 --> 00:17:16,711
s'il vous plait.
269
00:17:19,481 --> 00:17:20,615
Come again?
270
00:17:23,152 --> 00:17:25,754
Um...
271
00:17:25,787 --> 00:17:28,958
I will let my girlfriend
take over from me.
272
00:17:29,858 --> 00:17:30,893
All yours.
273
00:17:31,394 --> 00:17:32,861
Um...
274
00:17:40,970 --> 00:17:42,104
Yeah, oui, mate.
275
00:17:42,138 --> 00:17:43,805
Kapti proti pu.
276
00:17:44,639 --> 00:17:45,640
D'accord.
277
00:17:46,275 --> 00:17:47,676
Merci.
278
00:17:47,709 --> 00:17:49,045
What did you order, anyway?
279
00:17:57,519 --> 00:17:58,955
Just the four fish, then?
280
00:18:15,570 --> 00:18:17,440
Fucking hell,
it's beautiful, isn't it?
281
00:18:17,472 --> 00:18:20,042
Which I can't believe
we just found it.
282
00:18:20,076 --> 00:18:22,510
I-I can't believe
I'm seeing it with you.
283
00:18:22,544 --> 00:18:24,113
Shut up!
284
00:18:24,146 --> 00:18:27,316
No, I wouldn't do anything
like this without you, would I?
285
00:18:27,350 --> 00:18:30,618
'Cause I'm, like,
just a fucking idiot all the time.
286
00:18:30,652 --> 00:18:34,156
Poncing around like a bloody dinosaur.
287
00:18:38,626 --> 00:18:39,895
Run away,
run away.
288
00:18:39,929 --> 00:18:41,563
Oh, you make
me laugh, you idiot.
289
00:18:46,135 --> 00:18:47,436
After you.
290
00:20:54,497 --> 00:20:56,165
I can't see any
al fresco on this menu.
291
00:20:58,067 --> 00:20:59,634
What?
What do you mean?
292
00:21:00,369 --> 00:21:01,703
Al fresco.
293
00:21:01,736 --> 00:21:03,939
A mate wanted
to eat al fresco
294
00:21:03,973 --> 00:21:05,608
when you go
to a foreign land.
295
00:21:07,675 --> 00:21:11,580
Yeah, but Chris, you know
that's not a dish, right?
296
00:21:11,614 --> 00:21:13,781
That's just
eating outside.
297
00:21:14,984 --> 00:21:16,851
- Oh.
- Yeah.
298
00:21:16,886 --> 00:21:19,255
- Fucking hell.
- Thought it was some sort of salad.
299
00:21:32,867 --> 00:21:35,638
Oh, okay we're in. We're in.
How do, how we do this?
300
00:21:35,670 --> 00:21:37,072
Just, just
kiss me.
301
00:21:39,408 --> 00:21:41,277
Ooh, ooh, ooh!
Fuck me in the toilet.
302
00:21:41,310 --> 00:21:42,777
We've never done that.
303
00:21:43,711 --> 00:21:45,713
I've got a dress on
so it'll be really easy.
304
00:21:46,714 --> 00:21:48,984
Just hike it up.
You know what I mean?
305
00:21:49,018 --> 00:21:50,286
Okay.
306
00:21:55,790 --> 00:21:57,560
- Shit. Ah.
- Ah, shit.
307
00:21:57,593 --> 00:21:59,861
Oh, you look amazing.
Ah, shit.
308
00:21:59,895 --> 00:22:01,564
- Yeah, shit.
- Yeah.
309
00:22:01,597 --> 00:22:02,932
- Oh, shit.
- Oh, my God.
310
00:22:02,965 --> 00:22:04,567
I can't believe
we're doing this.
311
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:07,069
Oh, shit.
Ah, shit.
312
00:22:07,102 --> 00:22:09,638
- Oh shit, oh shit. Oh shit!
- Ah shit, yeah.
313
00:22:09,672 --> 00:22:12,107
- Oh shit. Oh...
- What you mean? What you mean?
314
00:22:12,141 --> 00:22:13,775
Oh my God! Shit!
315
00:22:13,808 --> 00:22:17,479
- Oh, shit.
- Look I love you, but I can't unsee this.
316
00:22:17,513 --> 00:22:19,747
- Oh! I need to get out.
- No.
317
00:22:19,781 --> 00:22:20,916
- I need to get out.
- No.
318
00:22:20,950 --> 00:22:22,585
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Don't you dare!
319
00:22:22,618 --> 00:22:23,818
- I've got to get out.
- No! No.
320
00:22:23,851 --> 00:22:25,321
- Don't you dare get out!
- I've got to get out.
321
00:22:25,354 --> 00:22:26,721
- You can't... Chris, stop!
- I've got to get out.
322
00:22:26,754 --> 00:22:28,057
- Stop, stop...
- I've got to get out.
323
00:22:28,090 --> 00:22:29,558
Please, I've got it pouring out of me.
324
00:22:29,592 --> 00:22:30,626
- Oh!
- Oh, God!
325
00:22:30,659 --> 00:22:31,660
Ugh, it's so bad.
326
00:22:38,300 --> 00:22:39,935
No! Stop it.
327
00:22:39,969 --> 00:22:41,170
Stop it. Oh, God!
328
00:22:41,203 --> 00:22:43,272
Ah, it's still coming.
God, it's still coming.
329
00:22:43,305 --> 00:22:44,340
It's like lava.
330
00:22:44,373 --> 00:22:45,873
Ugh, oh, God!
331
00:22:48,843 --> 00:22:50,512
Oh, my God,
I cannot believe
332
00:22:50,546 --> 00:22:52,847
that we just got chucked
off a train. Fuck!
333
00:22:54,617 --> 00:22:56,252
It's not like
having a shit's illegal.
334
00:22:56,751 --> 00:22:58,520
Well, it should be.
335
00:22:58,554 --> 00:23:00,189
I've never smelled
anything like that.
336
00:23:00,222 --> 00:23:01,957
Oh, thanks for the sympathy.
337
00:23:01,991 --> 00:23:03,825
How can I sympathize
with that shit?
338
00:23:05,594 --> 00:23:07,029
I'm hungry.
339
00:23:07,062 --> 00:23:09,331
- Can you pass me your bag?
- Why?
340
00:23:09,365 --> 00:23:10,466
I want to get
a chocolate bar.
341
00:23:10,499 --> 00:23:12,767
Ugh, God, can't you just
wait for the train?
342
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:14,069
It's like a four hour wait.
343
00:23:17,072 --> 00:23:18,907
Ugh, don't wanna get them
out of my bag.
344
00:23:20,509 --> 00:23:21,809
You ate them all, didn't you?
345
00:23:23,379 --> 00:23:24,779
What?
346
00:23:24,812 --> 00:23:26,015
You ate all the chocolate bars.
347
00:23:26,048 --> 00:23:28,317
No, I did not eat
all the fucking chocolate bars!
348
00:23:28,350 --> 00:23:30,252
You so did.
That's your lying face.
349
00:23:30,286 --> 00:23:31,520
I don't have a lying face.
350
00:23:31,553 --> 00:23:33,889
Everybody has a lying face,
and that's yours.
351
00:23:38,027 --> 00:23:39,662
All right,
maybe I did eat a few.
352
00:23:40,362 --> 00:23:42,331
I was hungry in the night.
353
00:23:42,364 --> 00:23:43,798
Fucking hell!
354
00:23:43,831 --> 00:23:46,101
There were like ten
chocolate bars in there.
355
00:23:46,135 --> 00:23:47,169
No wonder you shit yourself.
356
00:23:47,202 --> 00:23:49,104
There were not like
ten chocolate bars in there.
357
00:23:49,138 --> 00:23:50,838
- How many were there, then?
- I don't know.
358
00:23:52,007 --> 00:23:53,075
Nine?
359
00:23:53,108 --> 00:23:54,910
You ate nine whole
chocolate bars?
360
00:23:55,978 --> 00:23:58,347
Well, two of them
were Freddos
361
00:23:58,380 --> 00:24:01,150
and we all know that Freddos aren't
really proper chocolate bars, are they?
362
00:24:02,117 --> 00:24:03,152
You ate the Freddos?
363
00:24:03,786 --> 00:24:05,321
You know I love a Freddo.
364
00:24:05,354 --> 00:24:07,656
It's my favorite.
365
00:24:07,690 --> 00:24:09,124
Did you even think about me
while you were doing it?
366
00:24:09,158 --> 00:24:11,627
Oh, come on, Chris!
I wasn't fucking someone.
367
00:24:11,660 --> 00:24:14,163
I was hungry
and I had some chocolate.
368
00:24:14,196 --> 00:24:15,264
Some chocolate?
369
00:24:15,297 --> 00:24:16,498
Some chocolate?
370
00:24:16,532 --> 00:24:18,701
A couple of Roses at Christmas
is some chocolate.
371
00:24:18,734 --> 00:24:21,270
A line of Fruit & Nut
is some chocolate.
372
00:24:21,303 --> 00:24:22,471
Nine chocolate bars
373
00:24:22,504 --> 00:24:24,773
is a whole fucking
entire universe of chocolate.
374
00:24:24,807 --> 00:24:27,576
Oh, well, thank God you're
not being dramatic about it.
375
00:24:27,609 --> 00:24:29,144
Dramatic?
376
00:24:29,178 --> 00:24:31,980
You always do this,
make me out to be dramatic.
377
00:24:32,014 --> 00:24:33,949
You'd do the same if the
boot was on the other foot.
378
00:24:33,982 --> 00:24:35,117
No, I wouldn't.
379
00:24:35,150 --> 00:24:37,953
You so would. You so would.
380
00:24:37,986 --> 00:24:39,722
Do I have to remind you
about nacho-gate?
381
00:24:39,755 --> 00:24:41,757
Oh, no, you don't have to remind
me, because you know why?
382
00:24:41,790 --> 00:24:44,893
We always, always go back
to fucking nacho-gate
383
00:24:44,927 --> 00:24:46,228
and you throw them
right in my face
384
00:24:46,261 --> 00:24:48,464
anytime we have this argument.
385
00:24:48,497 --> 00:24:49,698
It was an accident
386
00:24:49,732 --> 00:24:51,500
and you didn't speak to me
for three whole days.
387
00:24:51,533 --> 00:24:53,602
Yes, because it was
an idiotic thing to do!
388
00:24:53,635 --> 00:24:55,604
I sat on some nachos!
389
00:24:55,637 --> 00:24:56,939
And not only that,
they were cheap nachos.
390
00:24:56,972 --> 00:24:59,274
Does it have anything to do
with how cheap they were?
391
00:24:59,308 --> 00:25:00,542
It's a matter of principles.
392
00:25:00,576 --> 00:25:02,010
Do nachos have principles?
393
00:25:02,044 --> 00:25:03,712
- Human beings do!
- Human beings?
394
00:25:03,746 --> 00:25:05,781
Have you actually heard the words that
are coming out your mouth right now?
395
00:25:05,814 --> 00:25:07,883
Yeah, I have, actually.
And do you wanna hear another thing?
396
00:25:07,916 --> 00:25:12,221
You are a stupid, imbecilic,
lazy, big-toed,
397
00:25:12,254 --> 00:25:15,257
hairy lips,
slightly stretchy,
398
00:25:15,290 --> 00:25:16,492
- one-balled...
- Oh!
399
00:25:16,525 --> 00:25:19,962
- ...dead-eyed, little buggy...
- Oh!
400
00:25:19,995 --> 00:25:21,463
...massive nosed,
401
00:25:21,497 --> 00:25:22,498
- fucking...
- Mmm.
402
00:25:22,531 --> 00:25:23,499
- ...hairy...
- Mmm.
403
00:25:23,532 --> 00:25:25,901
- ...bollocked dick!
- Yeah?
404
00:25:25,934 --> 00:25:26,668
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
405
00:25:26,702 --> 00:25:27,736
Well, hear this!
406
00:25:27,770 --> 00:25:30,806
You ponder about
like a fucking snail!
407
00:25:30,839 --> 00:25:34,376
You juice like a snail,
you smell like a snail.
408
00:25:34,410 --> 00:25:35,944
Do you know what?
Hear this!
409
00:25:35,978 --> 00:25:39,114
You are a little, snidey,
curly-haired,
410
00:25:39,148 --> 00:25:42,651
slightly balding,
slightly disgusting prick!
411
00:25:42,684 --> 00:25:44,486
Yeah? Well, hear this.
412
00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:46,221
You, you, you,
413
00:25:46,255 --> 00:25:48,390
boo, boo, boo, boo, boo,
414
00:25:48,424 --> 00:25:50,292
constant fucking moan,
415
00:25:50,325 --> 00:25:51,727
year round moan,
416
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,529
centuries of moaning.
417
00:25:53,562 --> 00:25:55,964
You are a sprouty eye-browed,
418
00:25:55,998 --> 00:25:57,699
sprouty nose-haired,
419
00:25:57,733 --> 00:25:59,835
stupid, slightly imbecilic,
420
00:25:59,868 --> 00:26:02,070
little bit
of a fucking old man.
421
00:26:02,104 --> 00:26:03,972
But do you know what?
You wanna hear another thing, too?
422
00:26:04,006 --> 00:26:06,408
You are a lopsided, cross-eyed,
423
00:26:06,442 --> 00:26:10,245
red-nosed little buck tooth
Wrigley's Extra little prick!
424
00:26:10,279 --> 00:26:11,113
Yeah?
425
00:26:11,146 --> 00:26:13,148
Well, you're a moany,
hairy-legged,
426
00:26:13,182 --> 00:26:14,750
mooncuppy bitch!
427
00:26:15,951 --> 00:26:17,753
Really?
428
00:26:17,786 --> 00:26:18,821
Really? You really went there.
429
00:26:18,854 --> 00:26:20,289
- Did you actually just say that?
- Yes.
430
00:26:20,322 --> 00:26:21,356
- Yes, I did.
- Oh, well, well done.
431
00:26:21,390 --> 00:26:22,591
Well done. Goodbye.
432
00:26:28,564 --> 00:26:29,731
She'll come back.
433
00:26:35,571 --> 00:26:38,874
♪ You were in the sun
that day
434
00:26:38,908 --> 00:26:41,743
♪ Looking for the way
435
00:26:42,144 --> 00:26:44,346
♪ I hope
436
00:26:45,113 --> 00:26:47,583
♪ That you'd stay
437
00:26:49,451 --> 00:26:52,889
♪ You were in the sun
that day
438
00:26:52,922 --> 00:26:55,357
♪ Looking for the way
439
00:26:59,261 --> 00:27:03,900
♪ Oh, I need you, my love
440
00:27:06,134 --> 00:27:09,137
♪ Oh, I need you
441
00:27:12,708 --> 00:27:17,346
♪ Oh, I need you, my love
442
00:27:19,381 --> 00:27:22,584
♪ So I won't lose my way
443
00:27:26,388 --> 00:27:28,790
♪ Oh, I won't lose my way
444
00:27:47,676 --> 00:27:48,878
What are you doing?
445
00:27:48,912 --> 00:27:50,178
I'm dancing!
446
00:27:50,212 --> 00:27:52,047
I can see that. But...
447
00:27:52,882 --> 00:27:54,349
I think maybe we should go.
448
00:27:54,383 --> 00:27:55,919
What? Why?
449
00:27:55,952 --> 00:27:57,786
Because...
450
00:27:57,819 --> 00:27:59,989
every guy in here
wants to do it with you.
451
00:28:00,722 --> 00:28:01,925
Especially him.
452
00:28:02,959 --> 00:28:06,029
You think?
Is that a bad thing?
453
00:28:06,061 --> 00:28:08,230
Well, it doesn't sit that well with
me, to be honest, no.
454
00:28:08,263 --> 00:28:09,398
Well, look,
455
00:28:09,431 --> 00:28:11,500
we've got at least three hours
until our train, right?
456
00:28:11,533 --> 00:28:12,634
- Yes.
- Right?
457
00:28:12,668 --> 00:28:13,635
So what do you wanna do?
458
00:28:13,669 --> 00:28:15,038
Sit out there in the cold?
459
00:28:15,070 --> 00:28:16,538
Or would you wanna
come down here
460
00:28:16,572 --> 00:28:18,206
and have a hot dance with me?
461
00:28:18,574 --> 00:28:19,808
Uh...
462
00:28:20,576 --> 00:28:21,978
Come on!
463
00:29:02,751 --> 00:29:05,220
But do you remember
the first time you saw me?
464
00:29:05,253 --> 00:29:07,189
- When you actually saw me?
- No.
465
00:29:08,624 --> 00:29:09,926
Of course I do!
466
00:29:11,193 --> 00:29:12,561
It was on Facebook.
467
00:29:12,594 --> 00:29:13,795
I was stalking you.
468
00:29:13,829 --> 00:29:15,230
- What?
- Yeah.
469
00:29:15,263 --> 00:29:16,264
Like a pervert.
470
00:29:16,298 --> 00:29:18,467
- Ugh, people do that?
- Yeah, no...
471
00:29:18,500 --> 00:29:21,336
I sort of found
a bikini picture...
472
00:29:23,238 --> 00:29:24,272
It was... I think...
473
00:29:24,306 --> 00:29:26,441
I think I saw you
on Mike's profile.
474
00:29:26,475 --> 00:29:27,643
It was, like, a group photo.
475
00:29:27,676 --> 00:29:28,878
Oh, really?
476
00:29:28,911 --> 00:29:30,846
- Mmm.
- And what did you think?
477
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:33,082
I thought you were
the loveliest girl
478
00:29:33,482 --> 00:29:34,616
I'd ever seen.
479
00:29:34,650 --> 00:29:36,085
- Really?
- Yeah.
480
00:29:36,119 --> 00:29:38,087
And what about now?
481
00:29:38,121 --> 00:29:40,056
- Honestly?
- Mmm-hmm.
482
00:29:40,089 --> 00:29:42,691
I think you've
let yourself go a little bit.
483
00:29:43,792 --> 00:29:45,995
Oh, come on! I'm joking.
484
00:29:46,029 --> 00:29:49,032
Everyone knows I'm punching.
485
00:29:49,065 --> 00:29:51,968
Punching above my weight.
486
00:29:52,534 --> 00:29:53,936
You're gorgeous.
487
00:29:53,970 --> 00:29:56,072
You're everything
in the right place.
488
00:29:56,105 --> 00:29:58,206
Apart from that bit of shit
in your teeth.
489
00:29:58,240 --> 00:29:59,441
- Oh, what? Have I?
- Yeah.
490
00:29:59,474 --> 00:30:01,343
You've always got something
in them grotbags, haven't you?
491
00:30:01,376 --> 00:30:02,344
What? No.
492
00:30:02,377 --> 00:30:03,578
- It's in the corner.
- Get it.
493
00:30:03,612 --> 00:30:04,947
Your left molar.
494
00:30:04,981 --> 00:30:06,015
There you go.
495
00:30:06,049 --> 00:30:07,950
See, don't say
I don't do anything for you.
496
00:30:07,984 --> 00:30:09,018
Well, you don't.
497
00:30:09,052 --> 00:30:09,986
- What?
- You don't!
498
00:30:10,019 --> 00:30:12,121
I just picked some shit
out of your teeth.
499
00:30:12,155 --> 00:30:14,222
And... Oh, so you know those
500
00:30:14,256 --> 00:30:18,094
pictures that I said I was gonna
put up for the last three months?
501
00:30:18,127 --> 00:30:19,194
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Yeah?
502
00:30:19,227 --> 00:30:21,697
Well, as soon as we get home,
I'm going to do it.
503
00:30:21,730 --> 00:30:23,265
Are you?
504
00:30:23,298 --> 00:30:25,534
- No.
- No? What? Why?
505
00:30:25,567 --> 00:30:26,702
I haven't got a hammer.
506
00:30:26,735 --> 00:30:28,837
Well, you can always
buy a hammer.
507
00:30:28,870 --> 00:30:30,305
What for?
508
00:30:30,338 --> 00:30:32,708
Well, you probably need it for all
the hamming you're gonna be doing.
509
00:30:32,741 --> 00:30:35,044
I think you'll find
that it's called hammering.
510
00:30:35,078 --> 00:30:38,147
Jesus, woman, do you know
nothing about DIY?
511
00:30:38,181 --> 00:30:39,381
Woman!
512
00:30:39,414 --> 00:30:43,119
Well, you know nothing
about women, man!
513
00:30:43,152 --> 00:30:44,820
What was the last thing
you bought me?
514
00:30:45,220 --> 00:30:46,488
Uh...
515
00:30:46,521 --> 00:30:48,590
Well, a lovely underwear set.
516
00:30:48,623 --> 00:30:50,993
What, the crotchess pants?
517
00:30:51,027 --> 00:30:53,295
Wasn't to start with, was it?
518
00:30:54,796 --> 00:30:57,532
Babe, I don't want
crotchess pants, do I?
519
00:30:57,566 --> 00:30:59,801
I want flowers,
and chocolates, and diamonds.
520
00:30:59,835 --> 00:31:01,603
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
521
00:31:01,636 --> 00:31:03,538
Hold your horses!
522
00:31:03,572 --> 00:31:05,208
No, no, no, no.
523
00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:06,341
Not weddings, Chris.
524
00:31:06,374 --> 00:31:07,709
- Don't lose your shit.
- Aye.
525
00:31:07,743 --> 00:31:10,712
Just, you know, a little,
little, little tiny something,
526
00:31:10,746 --> 00:31:11,914
just a little something,
527
00:31:11,948 --> 00:31:13,648
just a little, tiny something
528
00:31:13,682 --> 00:31:15,851
so I know you care
about me sometimes.
529
00:31:15,885 --> 00:31:17,220
- What...
- Just a little.
530
00:31:18,253 --> 00:31:19,755
What, you think
I don't care about you?
531
00:31:19,788 --> 00:31:21,523
No, I think you care about me.
532
00:31:21,556 --> 00:31:23,126
Good.
533
00:31:23,159 --> 00:31:25,293
You should think
yourself lucky.
534
00:31:25,327 --> 00:31:28,330
And stop your moaning.
535
00:31:29,999 --> 00:31:31,500
How long
have we been in here?
536
00:31:31,533 --> 00:31:32,567
I don't know.
537
00:31:32,601 --> 00:31:33,835
I feel like it...
538
00:31:34,870 --> 00:31:36,738
- There was a train we were supposed to...
- Fuck!
539
00:31:36,772 --> 00:31:38,241
- Oh, fuck!
- Oh, fuck!
540
00:32:23,552 --> 00:32:25,687
Buongiorno!
541
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:28,024
Buongiorno, Milano!
542
00:32:28,057 --> 00:32:29,892
- We made it to Italia.
- Yeah.
543
00:32:29,926 --> 00:32:32,694
We're here.
The home of fashion.
544
00:32:33,495 --> 00:32:34,529
♪ Fashion
545
00:32:36,232 --> 00:32:38,100
♪ Fashion, fashion
546
00:32:41,204 --> 00:32:43,605
I don't... I've got nothing
to rhyme with that.
547
00:33:21,143 --> 00:33:22,345
Hello!
548
00:33:23,511 --> 00:33:24,779
So, we're in Milan.
549
00:33:25,814 --> 00:33:28,117
Having a nice time.
550
00:33:28,150 --> 00:33:30,353
Lucy's just popped
into the, uh...
551
00:33:30,385 --> 00:33:32,154
pharmacy.
Get some lady bits.
552
00:33:33,890 --> 00:33:35,324
Thought we'd get a shaver.
553
00:33:35,358 --> 00:33:36,625
Sort that rat out.
554
00:33:37,525 --> 00:33:39,128
Never seen anything
like it.
555
00:33:39,828 --> 00:33:41,197
Hello, Lucy's Mum.
556
00:33:42,564 --> 00:33:43,865
So, uh...
557
00:33:43,900 --> 00:33:45,234
we're having a lovely time.
558
00:33:46,035 --> 00:33:48,137
Had a little slip up in Nice.
559
00:33:48,170 --> 00:33:51,374
Nothing too much to worry about, though.
Sort of all right.
560
00:33:51,406 --> 00:33:52,275
- And, uh...
- What are you doing?
561
00:33:52,308 --> 00:33:54,176
...we're off to Venice.
Hello!
562
00:33:54,210 --> 00:33:55,378
The love of my life.
563
00:33:55,410 --> 00:33:56,879
Right, come on.
564
00:33:56,913 --> 00:33:58,780
We need to find a loo
somewhere, okay?
565
00:33:58,813 --> 00:33:59,648
Okay.
566
00:34:00,316 --> 00:34:01,583
Probably needs a shit.
567
00:34:02,051 --> 00:34:02,885
See you soon.
568
00:34:46,828 --> 00:34:48,197
It's beautiful, innit?
569
00:34:48,230 --> 00:34:49,065
It really is.
570
00:34:50,632 --> 00:34:51,934
Oh!
571
00:34:51,968 --> 00:34:54,636
Oh, phone's ringing.
The old Mom. Oh!
572
00:35:03,446 --> 00:35:04,313
Lucy.
573
00:35:05,480 --> 00:35:06,382
Lucy, Lucy.
574
00:35:07,716 --> 00:35:08,951
I don't think
we're gonna fix that.
575
00:35:09,952 --> 00:35:10,785
Don't you?
576
00:35:11,320 --> 00:35:12,487
Really?
577
00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:13,788
Not smashed up, is it?
578
00:35:17,159 --> 00:35:18,493
We're just gonna have to
579
00:35:18,526 --> 00:35:20,329
find a payphone
and ring your mum.
580
00:35:20,363 --> 00:35:22,031
- How?
- What do you mean, how?
581
00:35:23,132 --> 00:35:24,632
Well, I don't know
my mum's number.
582
00:35:25,600 --> 00:35:27,869
You... You don't know
your own mum's number?
583
00:35:28,670 --> 00:35:30,538
I don't know anyone's number.
584
00:35:30,572 --> 00:35:32,108
Once I put it in my phone
once, that's it.
585
00:35:32,141 --> 00:35:34,944
My mum's number just becomes
"Mum" every time she calls me.
586
00:35:34,977 --> 00:35:36,745
Well, haven't you got it
written down somewhere?
587
00:35:36,778 --> 00:35:38,114
Oh, yeah, yeah.
588
00:35:38,147 --> 00:35:39,181
In my phone.
589
00:35:39,215 --> 00:35:40,815
So how are you gonna
get in touch with her, then?
590
00:35:40,849 --> 00:35:42,218
Well...
591
00:35:42,251 --> 00:35:45,121
do you remember when I said
we should bring your phone?
592
00:35:45,154 --> 00:35:46,355
How's that gonna help?
593
00:35:46,389 --> 00:35:48,958
Well, you could ring your mum
and ask her to call my mum.
594
00:35:48,991 --> 00:35:50,960
How is she going to do that?
595
00:35:50,993 --> 00:35:52,928
Well, doesn't your mum
have my mum's number?
596
00:35:53,329 --> 00:35:54,330
No.
597
00:35:54,363 --> 00:35:55,797
They've literally met twice.
598
00:35:55,830 --> 00:35:56,999
And your mum got so pissed
599
00:35:57,033 --> 00:35:59,068
that she threw up
all over my mum's shoes.
600
00:36:00,635 --> 00:36:02,138
Classic Heller.
601
00:36:03,772 --> 00:36:06,342
- Can we e-mail her?
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
602
00:36:06,375 --> 00:36:07,642
Let me just
whip out me laptop.
603
00:36:07,675 --> 00:36:08,944
Well, I don't mean now.
604
00:36:08,978 --> 00:36:11,113
- I mean, tomorrow or something.
- Oh.
605
00:36:11,147 --> 00:36:13,349
My mum has no idea
what an e-mail is.
606
00:36:14,283 --> 00:36:15,918
So what are we
going to do then?
607
00:36:15,951 --> 00:36:17,920
I don't know, carrier pigeon?
608
00:36:19,355 --> 00:36:21,057
♪ Down all day
609
00:36:22,525 --> 00:36:23,993
♪ Up all night
610
00:36:31,167 --> 00:36:32,101
Hey, you.
611
00:36:34,569 --> 00:36:35,737
We'd like a room, please.
612
00:36:35,770 --> 00:36:37,206
Sure thing. A single?
613
00:36:37,239 --> 00:36:38,541
Oh, no. A... A double.
614
00:36:38,573 --> 00:36:39,741
A double?
615
00:36:39,774 --> 00:36:41,944
Oh, right.
Traveling with a girlfriend.
616
00:36:41,977 --> 00:36:43,145
Uh, yeah.
617
00:36:44,180 --> 00:36:46,248
Why did you say
"ugh" like that?
618
00:36:46,282 --> 00:36:47,816
- It wasn't like "ugh," was it?
- Yeah, it was.
619
00:36:47,849 --> 00:36:49,351
- Can I see your passports?
- Yeah.
620
00:36:54,390 --> 00:36:55,324
Cute.
621
00:36:55,991 --> 00:36:57,026
Thanks.
622
00:36:57,059 --> 00:36:59,028
- Are you being serious?
- What?
623
00:36:59,061 --> 00:37:00,628
So is it just
for the one night?
624
00:37:00,662 --> 00:37:02,264
Yes, yeah,
just the one night.
625
00:37:02,298 --> 00:37:03,399
Such a shame.
626
00:37:03,432 --> 00:37:05,367
Well, breakfast is at 9:00.
It's an extra 10 euros,
627
00:37:05,401 --> 00:37:07,869
but come and see me, I'll sort you out.
628
00:37:07,903 --> 00:37:08,736
Thanks.
629
00:37:08,770 --> 00:37:10,306
It's still gonna be
10 euros for you.
630
00:37:11,240 --> 00:37:12,408
Oh.
631
00:37:16,178 --> 00:37:18,247
Room 8, just take the lift
to the second floor.
632
00:37:18,847 --> 00:37:19,949
Thanks.
633
00:37:19,982 --> 00:37:21,749
I'll be here all night
if you need anything.
634
00:37:21,783 --> 00:37:23,085
Are you fucking kidding me?
635
00:37:23,119 --> 00:37:24,353
Okay.
636
00:37:25,221 --> 00:37:26,821
That's lovely. Fantastic.
637
00:37:45,441 --> 00:37:46,841
That was a bit weird,
wasn't it?
638
00:37:51,447 --> 00:37:52,414
Chris.
639
00:37:56,452 --> 00:37:57,586
Chris?
640
00:37:59,221 --> 00:38:00,122
Ow.
641
00:38:01,323 --> 00:38:02,191
Ow!
642
00:38:06,495 --> 00:38:07,662
What happened?
643
00:38:09,131 --> 00:38:10,199
Oh, hi, honey.
644
00:38:13,502 --> 00:38:14,802
Did you punch me
in the head?
645
00:38:16,038 --> 00:38:17,839
What? No.
646
00:38:19,975 --> 00:38:21,676
It feels like
you punched me in the head.
647
00:38:22,211 --> 00:38:23,212
Well, I didn't.
648
00:38:24,113 --> 00:38:25,847
If you had have
punched me in the head...
649
00:38:26,714 --> 00:38:28,050
would you lie about it?
650
00:38:29,285 --> 00:38:30,219
Yes.
651
00:38:31,153 --> 00:38:32,087
Yes, I would.
652
00:38:34,056 --> 00:38:34,924
See...
653
00:38:36,025 --> 00:38:38,793
now that you've said
you would lie about it,
654
00:38:38,826 --> 00:38:41,230
that makes me think that
you did punch me in the head.
655
00:38:43,265 --> 00:38:44,699
Yeah, I...
656
00:38:44,732 --> 00:38:46,302
I can see why
it would look like that.
657
00:38:47,303 --> 00:38:48,637
And knock me out?
658
00:38:48,671 --> 00:38:50,838
You may have blacked out
for a little bit.
659
00:38:51,540 --> 00:38:52,774
A little bit?
660
00:38:52,807 --> 00:38:54,709
Well... Well, how long?
661
00:38:55,311 --> 00:38:56,278
About an hour.
662
00:38:57,279 --> 00:38:58,247
An hour?
663
00:39:00,382 --> 00:39:02,251
Well, how did I
get on the bed?
664
00:39:02,284 --> 00:39:03,785
I carried you.
665
00:39:04,587 --> 00:39:06,155
You carried me?
666
00:39:06,188 --> 00:39:08,290
Yeah, I thought you'd think that
you just fell asleep or something.
667
00:39:08,691 --> 00:39:09,824
Oh, nice.
668
00:39:10,893 --> 00:39:12,561
Right, so just to clarify,
669
00:39:12,595 --> 00:39:14,096
you did punch me in the head.
670
00:39:14,597 --> 00:39:15,698
Yeah.
671
00:39:16,899 --> 00:39:18,000
Right.
672
00:39:18,033 --> 00:39:20,002
- Where are you going?
- I'm going for a walk.
673
00:39:20,802 --> 00:39:22,338
Well, it's really late.
674
00:39:22,371 --> 00:39:24,573
Yeah? Well, I'd probably be safer
out there than I will in here,
675
00:39:24,607 --> 00:39:25,941
you violent assaultist.
676
00:39:27,842 --> 00:39:29,111
See you later, Rocky Balboa.
677
00:39:43,559 --> 00:39:44,627
Hi.
678
00:39:45,361 --> 00:39:47,029
- Oh, hi.
- Do you want one?
679
00:39:47,997 --> 00:39:49,265
Ooh.
680
00:39:49,298 --> 00:39:50,299
Don't mind if I do.
681
00:39:51,133 --> 00:39:52,268
Like a cheeky old fag.
682
00:39:53,402 --> 00:39:54,637
Cigarettes.
683
00:39:55,070 --> 00:39:56,005
Hmm.
684
00:40:03,479 --> 00:40:05,748
- You okay?
- Yep. I'm... I'm Chris.
685
00:40:06,048 --> 00:40:07,016
Carli.
686
00:40:07,416 --> 00:40:08,783
Thanks.
687
00:40:08,816 --> 00:40:11,320
Um... Am I bleeding?
688
00:40:11,353 --> 00:40:13,222
Bleeding?
No. Why?
689
00:40:13,255 --> 00:40:14,123
What did you do?
690
00:40:14,156 --> 00:40:16,158
My girlfriend punched me.
691
00:40:16,191 --> 00:40:17,693
- She did?
- Yeah.
692
00:40:17,726 --> 00:40:18,761
Why?
693
00:40:19,361 --> 00:40:21,030
Probably because of you.
694
00:40:21,063 --> 00:40:22,264
Because of me?
695
00:40:22,298 --> 00:40:23,666
Mmm, what did I do?
696
00:40:24,166 --> 00:40:25,134
Well...
697
00:40:26,001 --> 00:40:28,103
she thought
you were flirting with me.
698
00:40:28,671 --> 00:40:29,871
I was.
699
00:40:30,272 --> 00:40:31,206
Oh.
700
00:40:32,474 --> 00:40:33,942
That'll...
701
00:40:33,976 --> 00:40:35,878
That'd be why she was annoyed, then.
702
00:40:35,911 --> 00:40:37,379
So how long have
you guys been together?
703
00:40:38,013 --> 00:40:39,048
Uh...
704
00:40:40,282 --> 00:40:41,750
Going on a year and a half.
705
00:40:41,784 --> 00:40:43,385
- You happy?
- Um...
706
00:40:44,420 --> 00:40:46,789
Yeah. Yeah, we'd...
707
00:40:46,821 --> 00:40:48,957
We have the occasional spat.
708
00:40:49,525 --> 00:40:50,993
You gonna get married?
709
00:40:51,026 --> 00:40:52,394
Well, I don't know about that.
710
00:40:53,828 --> 00:40:56,498
What about you?
Have you got a fella, a chap?
711
00:40:56,532 --> 00:40:58,734
No. All alone.
712
00:40:58,767 --> 00:41:01,036
Oh, I find that
hard to believe.
713
00:41:01,670 --> 00:41:03,472
It's true. No one wants me.
714
00:41:03,505 --> 00:41:05,040
I find that
even harder to believe.
715
00:41:06,909 --> 00:41:09,211
Truth is, I get bored easy.
716
00:41:09,244 --> 00:41:11,714
Yeah. The old boredom.
717
00:41:11,747 --> 00:41:14,149
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Sets in, doesn't it?
718
00:41:14,183 --> 00:41:15,984
Life's too short
for just one cock.
719
00:41:16,552 --> 00:41:17,686
What?
720
00:41:19,388 --> 00:41:20,756
I mean, what...
721
00:41:20,789 --> 00:41:22,758
What if it's, uh...
What if it's great, a great cock?
722
00:41:22,791 --> 00:41:24,393
What's your definition
of a great cock?
723
00:41:25,794 --> 00:41:27,029
I don't know.
724
00:41:28,530 --> 00:41:30,032
A long, wide...
725
00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:34,103
girthy one, you know,
a nice one. That's nice.
726
00:41:34,136 --> 00:41:36,305
- Is that what yours is like?
- Mine?
727
00:41:36,338 --> 00:41:37,740
- Yeah.
- Uh...
728
00:41:37,773 --> 00:41:40,209
I mean, mine's like okay,
I suppose.
729
00:41:40,242 --> 00:41:41,677
- Show me.
- What?
730
00:41:41,977 --> 00:41:43,379
Show me.
731
00:41:43,412 --> 00:41:44,980
- Excuse me?
- Oh, come on.
732
00:41:45,013 --> 00:41:46,548
I promise
I'm not gonna touch it.
733
00:41:46,582 --> 00:41:48,083
I know, but...
734
00:41:48,117 --> 00:41:49,852
I've got a girlfriend.
735
00:41:49,885 --> 00:41:51,286
One who punches you
in the face.
736
00:41:51,320 --> 00:41:52,254
Only the once.
737
00:41:52,287 --> 00:41:53,655
Do you wanna fuck me, Chris?
738
00:41:54,390 --> 00:41:55,224
Ooh.
739
00:41:57,393 --> 00:42:00,295
It's a nice... Nice thing
to say, isn't it? But, uh...
740
00:42:01,497 --> 00:42:03,866
You know, I'm sure
that'd be lovely. Very...
741
00:42:04,867 --> 00:42:08,871
extravagant, yeah.
Excellent night's work.
742
00:42:09,405 --> 00:42:10,806
And nice fun, but...
743
00:42:10,839 --> 00:42:12,107
You know,
it's just I've got...
744
00:42:12,141 --> 00:42:13,542
I wasn't offering.
745
00:42:13,575 --> 00:42:15,677
I'm simply asking if it's
something that you'd want to do.
746
00:42:15,711 --> 00:42:17,246
Oh, right, yes.
747
00:42:17,279 --> 00:42:19,915
Yeah. It's more of an offer
not on the table, but...
748
00:42:21,383 --> 00:42:22,251
Chris!
749
00:42:27,689 --> 00:42:29,825
Ooh, ooh.
750
00:42:29,858 --> 00:42:32,961
- Fuck. What the fuck, Chris?
- What the fuck, Chris!
751
00:42:33,395 --> 00:42:34,596
Oh, my God!
752
00:42:34,630 --> 00:42:36,265
"Oh, my God,
I'm so fucking cute.
753
00:42:36,298 --> 00:42:39,501
"I've got really pointy nipples
and I'm so fucking cute." Chris!
754
00:42:39,535 --> 00:42:41,837
Oh, my God! Oh, God!
755
00:42:42,438 --> 00:42:43,439
Fuck.
756
00:42:43,472 --> 00:42:45,207
That's it. That's it.
757
00:42:45,240 --> 00:42:46,508
Can't do this anymore.
758
00:42:46,542 --> 00:42:47,609
Oh, my God,
I need to get of here.
759
00:42:47,643 --> 00:42:49,378
Get me out
of this fucking game!
760
00:42:50,813 --> 00:42:52,214
Shit, shit, shit.
761
00:42:58,554 --> 00:43:00,756
Oh, my God.
762
00:43:04,693 --> 00:43:05,994
Lucy!
763
00:43:06,528 --> 00:43:07,763
- Lucy.
- Fuck off!
764
00:43:07,796 --> 00:43:09,431
You'll never believe
what just happened.
765
00:43:09,465 --> 00:43:11,266
I threw up on the stairs.
766
00:43:11,300 --> 00:43:12,534
Do you think I should
tell someone about that?
767
00:43:12,568 --> 00:43:14,002
What the fuck
is wrong with you?
768
00:43:14,036 --> 00:43:16,171
I don't know. I think I'm just
not as fit as I used to be.
769
00:43:16,205 --> 00:43:17,941
My chest hurts.
770
00:43:17,973 --> 00:43:19,508
- Think I should sit down a bit.
- No!
771
00:43:19,541 --> 00:43:20,709
I'm not talking
about that, Chris.
772
00:43:20,742 --> 00:43:21,777
You kissed another girl!
773
00:43:21,810 --> 00:43:22,744
I didn't, though.
774
00:43:22,778 --> 00:43:24,413
You did!
I just fucking saw you!
775
00:43:24,446 --> 00:43:25,581
I just saw you.
776
00:43:25,614 --> 00:43:26,748
She kissed me.
777
00:43:26,782 --> 00:43:28,383
I had nothing
to do with it.
778
00:43:28,417 --> 00:43:31,019
A... Americans are strong,
aren't they? Like...
779
00:43:31,053 --> 00:43:33,455
No, it wasn't your fault,
was it? It never is!
780
00:43:33,489 --> 00:43:35,023
- What do you mean?
- I mean, Chris,
781
00:43:35,057 --> 00:43:37,493
you never take responsibility
for anything.
782
00:43:37,526 --> 00:43:38,760
You just bumble through life.
783
00:43:38,794 --> 00:43:40,462
"I'm Chris.
I'm really funny.
784
00:43:40,496 --> 00:43:42,431
"And nothing
is ever my fault."
785
00:43:42,464 --> 00:43:44,166
When the fuck are you
going to grow up?
786
00:43:45,434 --> 00:43:46,835
I said I'm sorry.
787
00:43:50,072 --> 00:43:51,173
That's just it.
788
00:43:52,641 --> 00:43:54,076
You haven't...
789
00:43:54,109 --> 00:43:56,211
You haven't said you're sorry,
not once.
790
00:43:57,579 --> 00:43:58,647
And you know what?
791
00:43:58,680 --> 00:44:00,215
I don't think I want to
do this anymore.
792
00:44:00,749 --> 00:44:01,985
I think I'm done.
793
00:44:04,419 --> 00:44:05,687
I'm done.
794
00:44:06,421 --> 00:44:07,256
Done?
795
00:44:07,723 --> 00:44:09,091
- Yeah.
- What...
796
00:44:09,124 --> 00:44:09,893
What does "done" mean?
797
00:44:09,926 --> 00:44:11,860
It means I'm done.
798
00:44:11,895 --> 00:44:14,263
Done. Done.
Done. Done.
799
00:44:15,430 --> 00:44:16,632
Done.
800
00:44:22,638 --> 00:44:25,274
♪ Dun, dun ta dun dun
Dun, dun ta dun dun
801
00:44:25,307 --> 00:44:28,878
♪ Dun, dun ta dun dun
Dun, dun ta dun
802
00:44:28,912 --> 00:44:29,778
You know it.
803
00:44:29,811 --> 00:44:31,780
♪ Dun, dun ta dun dun
804
00:44:31,813 --> 00:44:35,183
♪ Ru tu tu tu du
Ta ta da ta ♪
805
00:44:48,397 --> 00:44:49,398
Lucy.
806
00:45:22,230 --> 00:45:23,332
She'll be back.
807
00:45:56,933 --> 00:45:57,633
Hi.
808
00:45:57,666 --> 00:45:58,901
What I get you?
809
00:45:58,935 --> 00:46:00,869
- Just a Coke, please.
- Bene.
810
00:46:00,903 --> 00:46:01,737
Thanks.
811
00:46:04,539 --> 00:46:05,774
Just stick with
the sausage, Chris.
812
00:46:05,807 --> 00:46:07,643
Stick with the sausage
and chips.
813
00:46:16,085 --> 00:46:17,152
Hey.
814
00:46:17,185 --> 00:46:18,420
I'm Adriana.
815
00:46:18,955 --> 00:46:20,123
Lucy.
816
00:46:20,155 --> 00:46:21,657
What the fuck is that?
817
00:46:25,360 --> 00:46:26,461
Looks like some sort of...
818
00:46:27,362 --> 00:46:28,797
pregnancy test, isn't it?
819
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:34,070
Oh, well.
820
00:46:35,170 --> 00:46:36,304
No.
821
00:46:45,982 --> 00:46:47,616
It's all in fucking Italian.
822
00:46:47,649 --> 00:46:48,784
So,
what happened then?
823
00:46:49,451 --> 00:46:50,452
What?
824
00:46:50,485 --> 00:46:53,089
How come you're in a bar
all on your own?
825
00:46:54,256 --> 00:46:56,458
Uh, I had an argument
with my boyfriend.
826
00:46:56,491 --> 00:46:57,426
About what?
827
00:46:57,994 --> 00:46:59,361
He kissed another girl.
828
00:46:59,394 --> 00:47:00,629
I mean, he...
829
00:47:00,662 --> 00:47:02,131
He said that
she kissed him,
830
00:47:02,165 --> 00:47:03,832
and therefore,
it wasn't his fault.
831
00:47:03,865 --> 00:47:05,600
And you don't believe him?
832
00:47:05,634 --> 00:47:07,369
Well I mean,
she was really hot.
833
00:47:07,402 --> 00:47:08,403
So?
834
00:47:08,437 --> 00:47:10,572
So it literally took him
about six months
835
00:47:10,605 --> 00:47:12,374
to build up the courage
to kiss me.
836
00:47:12,407 --> 00:47:14,010
He's known this girl for...
837
00:47:14,643 --> 00:47:15,777
six seconds?
838
00:47:15,811 --> 00:47:16,879
And he could've stopped it?
839
00:47:16,913 --> 00:47:19,015
Um, yes,
he could've stopped it.
840
00:47:19,048 --> 00:47:20,816
What? It's not
that hard, is it?
841
00:47:28,557 --> 00:47:30,026
Okay.
842
00:47:30,059 --> 00:47:32,861
So, you were
supposed to stop me.
843
00:47:33,662 --> 00:47:35,131
Okay.
844
00:47:35,630 --> 00:47:37,866
Well, cool. Sorry.
845
00:47:37,900 --> 00:47:40,103
So, he could be
telling the truth.
846
00:47:40,136 --> 00:47:41,904
I mean, yeah.
847
00:47:41,938 --> 00:47:43,672
Yeah, I guess he could be.
848
00:48:02,992 --> 00:48:03,759
Oh, my...
849
00:48:03,792 --> 00:48:05,061
Well, I mean,
850
00:48:05,094 --> 00:48:06,828
that's not the only thing
that fucks me off about him.
851
00:48:06,862 --> 00:48:09,098
Okay. So, tell me.
852
00:48:09,132 --> 00:48:12,101
Um, well, he is...
853
00:48:12,135 --> 00:48:13,468
He's very childish.
854
00:48:13,502 --> 00:48:17,372
Um, I mean, like,
extremely childish.
855
00:48:17,405 --> 00:48:18,774
And he's just,
856
00:48:18,807 --> 00:48:21,177
he's got no...
no passion for anything,
857
00:48:21,210 --> 00:48:22,677
no drive at all.
858
00:48:22,711 --> 00:48:24,947
He doesn't smoke but
he definitely drinks too much
859
00:48:24,981 --> 00:48:27,016
and he masturbates a lot.
860
00:48:27,049 --> 00:48:28,850
Yeah, it's weird.
861
00:48:28,885 --> 00:48:32,021
And what do you
love about him?
862
00:48:35,323 --> 00:48:37,692
Well...
863
00:48:40,695 --> 00:48:41,931
Um...
864
00:48:43,632 --> 00:48:45,902
Okay. So it shouldn't be
taking this long.
865
00:48:45,935 --> 00:48:48,403
No, I know. I know.
866
00:48:48,436 --> 00:48:49,906
But there is stuff.
867
00:48:49,939 --> 00:48:52,175
- Obviously there is stuff.
- Stuff?
868
00:48:52,208 --> 00:48:53,242
You use the word "stuff"
869
00:48:53,276 --> 00:48:55,377
to describe the man
you're in love with?
870
00:48:58,948 --> 00:49:00,849
Yeah, that's not good,
is it?
871
00:49:03,119 --> 00:49:06,055
So, what are you
going to do now, then?
872
00:49:06,088 --> 00:49:09,292
Um... I think
I'll just go home.
873
00:49:09,825 --> 00:49:11,127
Where's home?
874
00:49:11,160 --> 00:49:12,494
- London.
- London?
875
00:49:12,527 --> 00:49:13,562
I live in London.
876
00:49:13,595 --> 00:49:15,231
I'm currently
on a placement year here.
877
00:49:15,264 --> 00:49:17,967
Oh, my God, it's such a small
world, isn't it?
878
00:49:18,867 --> 00:49:20,435
Well, what were you doing here?
879
00:49:20,468 --> 00:49:21,503
We were supposed to be
880
00:49:21,536 --> 00:49:23,672
on a 10-day trip
around Europe.
881
00:49:23,705 --> 00:49:25,774
So, why would you
go home then?
882
00:49:25,807 --> 00:49:27,977
That's the last thing
you should do.
883
00:49:28,476 --> 00:49:29,477
Why?
884
00:49:29,511 --> 00:49:31,546
You don't need him to
885
00:49:31,580 --> 00:49:32,882
go to a coffee shop with
886
00:49:32,915 --> 00:49:34,583
or go to a museum with
887
00:49:34,616 --> 00:49:37,419
or him buy you a bus ticket.
888
00:49:37,452 --> 00:49:39,788
You have so much
to think about.
889
00:49:40,488 --> 00:49:41,991
You can do it on your own.
890
00:49:47,296 --> 00:49:48,763
Yeah. I don't know.
891
00:49:49,865 --> 00:49:52,101
Where's next
on the adventure?
892
00:49:52,134 --> 00:49:55,570
Um, I'm supposed to get a 10:00 a.m.
train to Venice.
893
00:49:55,604 --> 00:49:56,872
I have a friend in Venice
894
00:49:56,906 --> 00:49:58,373
who you can
totally crash with.
895
00:49:58,406 --> 00:49:59,275
Adriana.
896
00:49:59,308 --> 00:50:00,675
She'd be
happy to have you.
897
00:50:00,709 --> 00:50:01,776
Do you have a pen and paper?
898
00:50:01,810 --> 00:50:03,745
You really
don't have to do that.
899
00:50:03,778 --> 00:50:04,881
She's called Mia.
900
00:50:04,914 --> 00:50:07,049
And she's amazing.
901
00:50:07,083 --> 00:50:08,951
And she can show you
the real Venice.
902
00:50:08,985 --> 00:50:10,987
You can just
crash on her sofa.
903
00:50:11,020 --> 00:50:13,055
Oh, my God.
Thank you.
904
00:50:13,089 --> 00:50:14,556
Honestly, you don't
have to do that.
905
00:50:14,589 --> 00:50:16,225
But thank you very much.
906
00:50:17,859 --> 00:50:19,728
So, what are you
going to do now?
907
00:50:21,130 --> 00:50:23,299
Probably just
get another hostel.
908
00:50:23,332 --> 00:50:24,666
You can stay with me. Yeah.
909
00:50:24,699 --> 00:50:25,667
Oh, my God!
910
00:50:25,700 --> 00:50:28,436
- No, I live five minutes away.
- Really?
911
00:50:28,470 --> 00:50:30,006
And it's really
simple and basic
912
00:50:30,039 --> 00:50:33,175
but it's home
and I'd love to have you.
913
00:50:33,209 --> 00:50:34,944
- Really?
- I insist.
914
00:50:35,810 --> 00:50:36,678
Drink up.
915
00:51:08,244 --> 00:51:09,711
Carbonara.
916
00:51:09,744 --> 00:51:10,679
Ciao.
917
00:51:10,712 --> 00:51:12,348
Buzzing in here, innit?
918
00:51:12,381 --> 00:51:13,082
What I get you?
919
00:51:13,115 --> 00:51:15,351
Oh, I'll have a beer, please.
920
00:51:20,789 --> 00:51:23,159
It's four euro.
921
00:51:25,660 --> 00:51:26,494
Thanks.
922
00:51:27,696 --> 00:51:29,131
- Okay.
- Keep the change.
923
00:51:29,165 --> 00:51:29,932
Grazie.
924
00:51:33,169 --> 00:51:34,236
What's that?
925
00:51:37,373 --> 00:51:38,606
No. No.
926
00:51:38,640 --> 00:51:41,043
Yes.
927
00:51:42,244 --> 00:51:43,578
Lay your key?
928
00:51:46,916 --> 00:51:48,616
Yeah, you haven't
got much le, have you?
929
00:51:48,650 --> 00:51:50,286
It's all on your chest,
isn't it?
930
00:51:52,254 --> 00:51:53,588
What's happening now?
931
00:51:57,293 --> 00:51:58,394
I'm not Italian.
932
00:51:58,427 --> 00:51:59,627
Ah, here.
933
00:51:59,661 --> 00:52:00,762
- Ah.
- Le, here.
934
00:52:00,795 --> 00:52:02,098
Shall I lay here?
935
00:52:02,131 --> 00:52:02,864
- No. No.
- No?
936
00:52:02,898 --> 00:52:05,201
Le ara, here. Here.
937
00:52:05,234 --> 00:52:07,470
- Here.
- Here.
938
00:52:07,502 --> 00:52:09,405
- Oh, here!
- Si.
939
00:52:09,438 --> 00:52:11,773
Ah, got you! Here.
940
00:52:11,806 --> 00:52:13,641
♪ We can hear
You can hear
941
00:52:13,675 --> 00:52:15,844
♪ I can hear
We can all hear
942
00:52:16,578 --> 00:52:18,347
♪ I got a beer
943
00:52:18,381 --> 00:52:19,882
♪ I was just going to
Go over here ♪
944
00:52:19,915 --> 00:52:21,516
- Okay, yes. You go.
- Yeah.
945
00:52:21,549 --> 00:52:22,617
- Yeah, go.
- Yes.
946
00:52:22,650 --> 00:52:24,286
- Si.
- Si. Now, ta!
947
00:52:24,320 --> 00:52:25,187
Ciao!
948
00:52:52,647 --> 00:52:54,849
- Salute.
- Salute.
949
00:53:01,023 --> 00:53:03,025
- Salute.
- Salute.
950
00:53:05,593 --> 00:53:06,495
Oh!
951
00:53:20,443 --> 00:53:21,776
Fuck's sake.
952
00:53:57,612 --> 00:53:58,447
Morning.
953
00:53:59,081 --> 00:54:00,082
Hi.
954
00:54:00,116 --> 00:54:01,417
I'd like to check out, please.
955
00:54:01,450 --> 00:54:03,552
Okay. Did you enjoy your stay?
956
00:54:03,586 --> 00:54:06,455
You know,
it wasn't the best.
957
00:54:06,489 --> 00:54:08,124
I'm sorry to hear that.
958
00:54:08,157 --> 00:54:10,292
Anything else
I can help you with?
959
00:54:10,326 --> 00:54:11,659
Um, do you have a map?
960
00:54:11,693 --> 00:54:12,694
Sure.
961
00:54:14,296 --> 00:54:15,531
- Here.
- Oh...
962
00:54:15,564 --> 00:54:17,333
The girl working
last night, Carli?
963
00:54:17,366 --> 00:54:18,300
Yes.
964
00:54:18,334 --> 00:54:19,935
Could you, uh, say
goodbye to her for me?
965
00:54:19,969 --> 00:54:21,769
Of course.
She's my girlfriend.
966
00:54:23,038 --> 00:54:23,872
Come again.
967
00:54:23,906 --> 00:54:25,374
She's my girlfriend.
968
00:54:26,808 --> 00:54:27,910
Good luck with that.
969
00:54:27,943 --> 00:54:29,777
- Oh, do you have the time?
- Yeah.
970
00:54:31,313 --> 00:54:32,847
- 9:50.
- 9:50?
971
00:54:32,882 --> 00:54:35,451
- 9:50. Yes.
- As in 10 to 10?
972
00:54:35,484 --> 00:54:36,886
- Yes.
- Shit!
973
00:55:16,592 --> 00:55:18,060
Not even bloody close.
974
00:55:27,903 --> 00:55:31,073
♪ You were in the flow
Of things
975
00:55:32,608 --> 00:55:34,143
♪ Don't you know
976
00:55:34,176 --> 00:55:38,948
♪ I was there with you
Somehow, somehow
977
00:55:40,449 --> 00:55:42,284
♪ Windows in the sun
978
00:55:42,318 --> 00:55:46,422
♪ I think I can see you
979
00:55:46,455 --> 00:55:51,493
♪ The light is on the run
And it's going nowhere
980
00:55:53,828 --> 00:55:58,667
♪ Hello to you
981
00:55:58,701 --> 00:56:04,240
♪ Did you ever know that you
Were in the middle of my mind
982
00:56:06,475 --> 00:56:11,347
♪ Hello to you
983
00:56:11,380 --> 00:56:17,386
♪ I could never figure out
Why you were so hard to find
984
00:56:25,961 --> 00:56:32,134
♪ You were in the sand
Dancing forever
985
00:56:32,167 --> 00:56:37,306
♪ I was there with you
Somehow, somehow
986
00:56:39,408 --> 00:56:44,346
♪ Hello to you
987
00:56:44,380 --> 00:56:49,518
♪ Did you ever know that you
Were in the middle of my mind
988
00:56:51,887 --> 00:56:54,822
♪ Hello to you
989
00:56:54,856 --> 00:56:56,791
- Hi.
- Hi.
990
00:56:56,824 --> 00:56:58,860
- Is that a poo?
- Yep.
991
00:56:58,894 --> 00:56:59,962
Potent, isn't it?
992
00:56:59,995 --> 00:57:01,430
Really stings the old nostrils.
993
00:57:01,463 --> 00:57:03,732
- Uh, I've smelled worse.
- Lovely.
994
00:57:03,766 --> 00:57:04,767
Um...
995
00:57:05,668 --> 00:57:06,935
You haven't seen this girl,
have you?
996
00:57:07,835 --> 00:57:09,238
No, I'm afraid not.
997
00:57:09,271 --> 00:57:10,939
Okay. No worries.
998
00:57:10,973 --> 00:57:12,341
Would you like a room?
999
00:57:13,442 --> 00:57:15,377
- I'm good, thanks. See you later, mate.
- Okay.
1000
00:57:36,065 --> 00:57:38,334
Here you go.
Decaf.
1001
00:57:39,268 --> 00:57:40,235
Thanks.
1002
00:57:41,036 --> 00:57:42,037
You okay?
1003
00:57:42,938 --> 00:57:44,173
Yeah, I'm fine.
1004
00:57:45,007 --> 00:57:46,909
You know, it's okay
not to be okay.
1005
00:57:49,912 --> 00:57:52,948
So, I'm in Venice.
1006
00:57:54,149 --> 00:57:56,085
Decided to have a little
go on a gondolier.
1007
00:57:57,353 --> 00:57:58,354
It's good.
1008
00:57:59,355 --> 00:58:00,489
Come meet me mate here.
1009
00:58:03,359 --> 00:58:04,460
It's not what his name is.
1010
00:58:06,929 --> 00:58:09,732
- Buongiorno!
- Buongiorno!
1011
00:58:09,765 --> 00:58:12,134
- Buongiorno!
- Buongiorno!
1012
00:58:13,802 --> 00:58:17,005
Fitting in for
the old locales.
1013
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:20,042
What is it they say?
1014
00:58:20,075 --> 00:58:22,077
"Plenty more fish in the sea."
1015
00:58:23,212 --> 00:58:25,748
Yeah, that is...
That is what they say.
1016
00:58:26,648 --> 00:58:29,785
♪ I'm here in Venice
1017
00:58:29,818 --> 00:58:32,588
Right, that's it,
tonight we're going out.
1018
00:58:32,621 --> 00:58:34,857
♪ I'm going to find her
1019
00:58:35,657 --> 00:58:38,761
♪ And tell her I'm sorry
1020
00:58:38,794 --> 00:58:40,062
We're going to go out,
we're going to have fun,
1021
00:58:40,095 --> 00:58:41,597
we're going to go dancing.
1022
00:58:41,630 --> 00:58:44,266
- I've got nothing to wear.
- It's fine.
1023
00:58:44,299 --> 00:58:45,801
I know the perfect place.
1024
00:59:16,532 --> 00:59:17,533
Sorry...
1025
00:59:20,469 --> 00:59:22,471
Okay. I'm going to go.
I'll go.
1026
00:59:22,504 --> 00:59:24,173
Bye. Friendly here, aren't they?
1027
01:00:01,777 --> 01:00:02,778
Hello, old lady.
1028
01:00:07,316 --> 01:00:08,450
It's hot, innit?
1029
01:00:09,618 --> 01:00:11,253
I don't do that well
in the heat.
1030
01:00:12,221 --> 01:00:13,388
Or the cold.
1031
01:00:14,690 --> 01:00:16,091
That's why
I got an ice cream.
1032
01:00:16,960 --> 01:00:18,727
And a sweater in me bag.
1033
01:00:19,728 --> 01:00:21,096
Good work with the coat.
1034
01:00:21,129 --> 01:00:22,464
Good move, smart.
1035
01:00:24,934 --> 01:00:27,436
You don't have anywhere to
stay, do you, around here?
1036
01:00:27,469 --> 01:00:29,671
It's just, the last place
I was at was, um...
1037
01:00:29,705 --> 01:00:30,940
Well, it wasn't very nice.
1038
01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:33,809
There was a big shit
on the floor.
1039
01:00:34,911 --> 01:00:37,012
It was like a French stick.
1040
01:00:37,045 --> 01:00:38,882
I haven't
seen anything like it.
1041
01:00:40,015 --> 01:00:41,985
I've had a pretty shitty
couple of days.
1042
01:00:43,151 --> 01:00:44,820
Found out
my girlfriend's pregnant.
1043
01:00:45,721 --> 01:00:46,956
That's amazing.
1044
01:00:47,856 --> 01:00:49,893
It's pretty good news.
1045
01:00:49,926 --> 01:00:51,493
Then she caught me
kissing another girl
1046
01:00:51,527 --> 01:00:52,962
and ran off.
1047
01:00:53,897 --> 01:00:54,863
Well, I wasn't
kissing another girl,
1048
01:00:54,898 --> 01:00:56,265
she was kissing me,
1049
01:00:56,865 --> 01:00:59,134
but she doesn't know that.
1050
01:00:59,167 --> 01:01:02,271
So, I'm pretty much just wandering
around Venice like a prick.
1051
01:01:03,505 --> 01:01:05,140
She's beautiful, my Lucy.
1052
01:01:06,608 --> 01:01:07,809
She's amazing.
1053
01:01:09,111 --> 01:01:12,514
Like you... You were probably
beautiful when you were younger.
1054
01:01:12,548 --> 01:01:14,816
You're still all right now,
you know.
1055
01:01:19,154 --> 01:01:20,890
I know I'm not much
to look at.
1056
01:01:21,757 --> 01:01:23,525
But I'm funny.
1057
01:01:23,559 --> 01:01:25,627
I've got pretty
good-sized penis,
1058
01:01:25,661 --> 01:01:27,296
medium-sized.
1059
01:01:28,697 --> 01:01:29,865
You'll never know, though.
1060
01:01:31,968 --> 01:01:35,939
Yeah, so that's me,
just wandering around Venice.
1061
01:01:35,972 --> 01:01:38,440
Let me know if you fancy doing
anything later 'cause
1062
01:01:38,473 --> 01:01:39,976
I'm at a loose end.
1063
01:01:41,176 --> 01:01:45,514
Probably go out,
dinner, dance, you know.
1064
01:01:47,050 --> 01:01:49,451
All right, well,
it's been nice chatting.
1065
01:01:50,485 --> 01:01:51,853
I love a good chat.
1066
01:01:53,689 --> 01:01:55,223
So I'll get off now.
1067
01:01:55,257 --> 01:01:56,358
See you later, old lady.
1068
01:02:37,532 --> 01:02:38,533
Mia!
1069
01:03:18,975 --> 01:03:21,176
- I think he fancies you.
- Oh, my God, Mia!
1070
01:03:21,209 --> 01:03:22,277
He doesn't fancy me.
1071
01:03:22,310 --> 01:03:23,779
- I think he fancies you.
- He doesn't. He fancies you.
1072
01:03:23,812 --> 01:03:25,982
Everyone fucking fancies you. You're kidding me.
1073
01:03:26,015 --> 01:03:28,784
- Oh, my God!
- Oh!
1074
01:03:32,688 --> 01:03:33,890
Hello.
1075
01:03:40,163 --> 01:03:44,433
This is Chris and Lucy's
trip to Europe.
1076
01:03:46,368 --> 01:03:47,469
Here's Chris.
1077
01:03:49,538 --> 01:03:51,406
It's not Lucy, is it?
1078
01:03:51,440 --> 01:03:53,109
No, it's a big fucking bag,
1079
01:03:55,610 --> 01:03:57,312
not Lucy.
1080
01:03:57,345 --> 01:03:59,182
Do you know where she is?
1081
01:03:59,214 --> 01:04:01,516
Do you know why
I don't know where she is?
1082
01:04:01,550 --> 01:04:03,852
'Cause she fucked off.
1083
01:04:04,519 --> 01:04:05,821
Walked off,
1084
01:04:06,488 --> 01:04:10,358
because... because of me.
1085
01:04:15,363 --> 01:04:18,000
Because of how I behave.
1086
01:04:18,034 --> 01:04:20,469
Because I don't think.
1087
01:04:24,673 --> 01:04:25,707
I don't...
1088
01:04:25,741 --> 01:04:27,509
I don't think
about her enough.
1089
01:04:28,510 --> 01:04:30,113
But all she does
is think about me.
1090
01:04:33,815 --> 01:04:36,919
So, you stayed here
even though he left you?
1091
01:04:36,953 --> 01:04:39,956
Hell, yeah. This is my home.
1092
01:04:39,989 --> 01:04:42,024
Not just gonna run away.
Fuck that.
1093
01:04:43,126 --> 01:04:44,894
Yeah, but weren't you scared?
1094
01:04:45,827 --> 01:04:48,330
Oh, my God. Terrified.
1095
01:04:49,598 --> 01:04:52,300
But that's how I knew I was
doing the right thing.
1096
01:04:54,836 --> 01:04:57,272
If you're not
living on the edge
1097
01:04:58,340 --> 01:05:00,475
then you're taking up
too much space.
1098
01:05:02,744 --> 01:05:05,547
I mean, I'm not saying that's how
everyone should live their lives
1099
01:05:05,580 --> 01:05:07,917
but it worked for me.
1100
01:05:10,019 --> 01:05:11,853
I'm a fucking wanker.
1101
01:05:12,955 --> 01:05:14,322
I don't even see it.
1102
01:05:15,724 --> 01:05:18,094
I walked
around in Venice.
1103
01:05:19,461 --> 01:05:21,063
I went on a gondolier.
1104
01:05:21,097 --> 01:05:24,299
Only it's not a gondolier,
it's called a gondola.
1105
01:05:25,101 --> 01:05:26,668
And I know
it's called a gondola
1106
01:05:26,701 --> 01:05:28,905
but I say gondolier
1107
01:05:28,938 --> 01:05:30,539
'cause I think
it'll make her laugh.
1108
01:05:30,572 --> 01:05:32,175
And it does.
1109
01:05:32,208 --> 01:05:33,842
'Cause I do all the
other stuff.
1110
01:05:34,676 --> 01:05:36,511
I don't say,
I don't...
1111
01:05:36,545 --> 01:05:38,047
Doesn't make
her laugh.
1112
01:05:38,080 --> 01:05:41,284
I don't... think.
1113
01:05:45,787 --> 01:05:47,455
So I went on it
on my own.
1114
01:05:47,489 --> 01:05:50,826
I sat next to an old lady
on a bench on my own.
1115
01:05:50,859 --> 01:05:53,595
And she was lovely.
1116
01:05:55,898 --> 01:05:58,100
Couldn't understand
a fucking work I was saying.
1117
01:06:00,136 --> 01:06:01,803
But Lucy
does understand...
1118
01:06:02,337 --> 01:06:04,539
the words I say.
1119
01:06:04,573 --> 01:06:06,608
That's why I should
think what I say
1120
01:06:06,641 --> 01:06:08,211
before I say it.
1121
01:06:10,445 --> 01:06:13,015
I couldn't be more terrified
right now if I tried.
1122
01:06:13,815 --> 01:06:15,717
Fuck him,
he's a dick...
1123
01:06:15,750 --> 01:06:17,119
I'm pregnant.
1124
01:06:17,719 --> 01:06:18,553
So...
1125
01:06:21,523 --> 01:06:22,892
there's that.
1126
01:06:22,925 --> 01:06:24,426
Let me ask you
a question.
1127
01:06:26,262 --> 01:06:27,429
Do you love him?
1128
01:06:33,269 --> 01:06:34,337
Yeah.
1129
01:06:35,570 --> 01:06:37,039
Fucking hell.
Look at the rain.
1130
01:06:39,208 --> 01:06:41,143
I deserve this,
I deserve to be...
1131
01:06:42,912 --> 01:06:44,247
out in the rain...
1132
01:06:45,447 --> 01:06:46,949
on my own.
1133
01:06:46,983 --> 01:06:49,151
And she deserves
to be in somewhere...
1134
01:06:50,052 --> 01:06:52,420
nice,
with nice people.
1135
01:06:55,291 --> 01:06:57,026
But we're meant to be.
1136
01:06:57,059 --> 01:07:00,528
You know,
when canals go
1137
01:07:00,562 --> 01:07:03,632
in Venice,
go to places.
1138
01:07:03,665 --> 01:07:05,734
We're supposed
to go to a place.
1139
01:07:05,767 --> 01:07:07,535
So I'm gonna go
on a canal tomorrow
1140
01:07:07,569 --> 01:07:08,803
and find her.
1141
01:07:12,807 --> 01:07:15,378
And also I'll behave,
1142
01:07:15,410 --> 01:07:16,511
and say sorry.
1143
01:07:19,547 --> 01:07:20,983
And I'll call it a gondola.
1144
01:07:26,923 --> 01:07:29,892
Lucy... I'll see you
tomorrow.
1145
01:07:31,060 --> 01:07:32,061
Bye.
1146
01:08:36,192 --> 01:08:37,159
Excuse me.
1147
01:08:38,928 --> 01:08:42,398
Um, you haven't seen
this girl, have you?
1148
01:08:45,001 --> 01:08:45,968
No.
1149
01:08:47,036 --> 01:08:48,471
But you're not
really looking.
1150
01:08:48,503 --> 01:08:50,538
- No.
- No?
1151
01:08:51,706 --> 01:08:54,410
- No.
- No?
1152
01:08:54,776 --> 01:08:55,777
No.
1153
01:08:56,879 --> 01:08:58,247
It's nice, this place,
isn't it?
1154
01:09:00,582 --> 01:09:01,917
Got you there,
didn't I?
1155
01:09:12,395 --> 01:09:13,362
Excuse me.
1156
01:09:18,833 --> 01:09:20,869
- Hello.
- Hello.
1157
01:09:21,203 --> 01:09:22,038
Um...
1158
01:09:23,072 --> 01:09:24,507
You haven't seen
this girl, have you?
1159
01:09:24,539 --> 01:09:26,142
Is she
staying here?
1160
01:09:30,146 --> 01:09:31,414
No.
1161
01:09:32,781 --> 01:09:34,083
Are you sure?
1162
01:09:35,750 --> 01:09:37,953
Yes, I'm sure.
I'm sorry, mate.
1163
01:09:37,987 --> 01:09:40,489
Aw.
That's all right, mate.
1164
01:09:40,523 --> 01:09:42,058
- Have a good day.
- You too.
1165
01:10:02,777 --> 01:10:04,113
- Hi.
- Hello.
1166
01:10:04,146 --> 01:10:05,847
Um, I'd like
a room please.
1167
01:10:07,416 --> 01:10:09,518
I've seen
you before.
1168
01:10:10,352 --> 01:10:12,188
Do we know
each other?
1169
01:10:12,221 --> 01:10:14,890
I'm not sure,
but I've seen you before.
1170
01:10:14,924 --> 01:10:16,724
On a...
on a film.
1171
01:10:17,759 --> 01:10:18,793
I'm not
an actress.
1172
01:10:18,827 --> 01:10:20,096
Um...
1173
01:10:20,129 --> 01:10:22,730
Can I just
get a room, please?
1174
01:10:22,764 --> 01:10:24,133
Certainly.
1175
01:11:49,218 --> 01:11:51,086
Helloo!
1176
01:11:51,753 --> 01:11:53,222
Helloo!
1177
01:12:05,733 --> 01:12:06,969
Hello.
1178
01:12:07,002 --> 01:12:08,938
- Hello.
- Can I help you?
1179
01:12:09,905 --> 01:12:11,773
Yes, you can.
1180
01:12:11,806 --> 01:12:14,043
I'd like a room, please.
1181
01:12:14,076 --> 01:12:15,644
- Oh, fine...
- Tala-ba-da-da.
1182
01:12:16,912 --> 01:12:18,180
Before you ask...
1183
01:12:21,951 --> 01:12:23,552
Mmm-hmm
1184
01:12:23,586 --> 01:12:25,087
This ain't my first rodeo.
1185
01:12:25,888 --> 01:12:28,190
- There you go.
- Thank you.
1186
01:12:30,960 --> 01:12:32,561
Zom-zom.
1187
01:12:32,595 --> 01:12:35,231
Can I...
can I just say...
1188
01:12:35,264 --> 01:12:37,832
that you have
beautiful eyes.
1189
01:12:38,267 --> 01:12:39,468
Both of them.
1190
01:12:40,369 --> 01:12:42,304
Contacts?
1191
01:12:43,172 --> 01:12:45,074
- No.
- Amazing.
1192
01:12:46,175 --> 01:12:48,477
So, how much
is it for the old?
1193
01:12:48,510 --> 01:12:51,146
So, that'll be 69 euro.
1194
01:12:51,180 --> 01:12:53,282
Stone the fucking
crows, mate.
1195
01:12:53,649 --> 01:12:54,917
'Struth!
1196
01:12:55,750 --> 01:12:57,852
I want a room,
not the building.
1197
01:12:57,886 --> 01:12:59,488
Would you like
the room or not?
1198
01:12:59,854 --> 01:13:01,624
Yeah, I do.
1199
01:13:01,657 --> 01:13:03,959
- Fine.
- I was just being funny.
1200
01:13:03,993 --> 01:13:06,128
- So...
- There you go old girl.
1201
01:13:06,161 --> 01:13:08,631
Count it out,
old bean.
1202
01:13:08,664 --> 01:13:10,832
There you go, mate.
1203
01:13:10,865 --> 01:13:13,135
- Thank you very much...
- Keep the fucking change.
1204
01:13:13,168 --> 01:13:16,572
That's um...
room 11, 3rd floor.
1205
01:13:22,344 --> 01:13:24,480
Good evening.
Have a good night's sleep.
1206
01:13:24,513 --> 01:13:26,448
- Good night.
- You'll need it.
1207
01:13:27,316 --> 01:13:28,450
I love you.
1208
01:13:57,246 --> 01:13:58,080
What's that?
1209
01:13:58,813 --> 01:13:59,814
Ah!
1210
01:14:00,316 --> 01:14:01,984
What the fuck?
1211
01:14:03,818 --> 01:14:04,920
Ah, shit!
1212
01:14:07,423 --> 01:14:08,590
Whose that?
1213
01:14:08,624 --> 01:14:09,857
Whose that?
1214
01:14:10,959 --> 01:14:13,128
I'm on a merry go round
and I don't like it.
1215
01:15:03,645 --> 01:15:05,748
- Oh, good morning.
- Morning.
1216
01:15:05,781 --> 01:15:07,516
- Did you have a good stay?
- I did, yeah.
1217
01:15:07,549 --> 01:15:09,985
There was a very loud guy
this morning, though.
1218
01:15:10,018 --> 01:15:11,887
Oh, I think I know
who you mean.
1219
01:15:11,920 --> 01:15:13,522
I hope he wasn't too much
of a nuisance.
1220
01:15:13,555 --> 01:15:14,356
Just drunk, was he?
1221
01:15:14,390 --> 01:15:16,892
Yeah. Bit of a
flirt too, actually.
1222
01:15:16,925 --> 01:15:18,727
- Brilliant.
- Harmless enough, though.
1223
01:15:18,761 --> 01:15:20,596
I think he had
a rough day.
1224
01:15:20,629 --> 01:15:22,631
Ah, yeah.
I know the feeling.
1225
01:15:22,664 --> 01:15:24,233
Is there anything
I can help you with?
1226
01:15:24,266 --> 01:15:27,102
Can you tell me the way
to the Piazza Della Liberta?
1227
01:15:27,136 --> 01:15:30,172
Sure. Um, at the door
turn left
1228
01:15:30,205 --> 01:15:31,907
and at the end
of the street turn right
1229
01:15:31,940 --> 01:15:33,409
and it's about
four blocks away.
1230
01:15:33,442 --> 01:15:35,511
- Okay, perfect. Thank you.
- Okay. You have a great day.
1231
01:15:35,544 --> 01:15:37,179
- You too, Ciao.
- Bye.
1232
01:15:58,801 --> 01:16:00,102
Excuse me.
1233
01:16:02,404 --> 01:16:03,907
Excuse me!
1234
01:16:04,706 --> 01:16:07,242
- Ah, good morning.
- Good morning.
1235
01:16:07,276 --> 01:16:08,677
How are you
this morning?
1236
01:16:08,710 --> 01:16:11,680
Um, well I feel my
head's gonna explode.
1237
01:16:11,713 --> 01:16:13,015
Other than that,
great thanks.
1238
01:16:13,048 --> 01:16:14,716
But you found
your girl, though?
1239
01:16:14,750 --> 01:16:16,385
- What?
- You found her?
1240
01:16:16,418 --> 01:16:18,387
The girl in the film.
You found her?
1241
01:16:18,420 --> 01:16:22,691
No. I've pretty much checked
every hostel in Florence.
1242
01:16:22,724 --> 01:16:23,759
No luck.
1243
01:16:23,792 --> 01:16:25,994
- She was here at breakfast.
- What?
1244
01:16:26,028 --> 01:16:27,563
At breakfast
I saw her.
1245
01:16:27,596 --> 01:16:28,864
- At breakfast?
- Yes.
1246
01:16:28,898 --> 01:16:29,832
- Here?
- Yes.
1247
01:16:29,865 --> 01:16:31,800
- Is she still here?
- I think so.
1248
01:16:31,834 --> 01:16:33,302
Uh, I will
just check.
1249
01:16:33,335 --> 01:16:35,871
Emma, could you help
this gentleman, please?
1250
01:16:36,738 --> 01:16:38,173
My girl, you saw my girl?
1251
01:16:38,207 --> 01:16:40,342
- Um, the pretty one?
- Yes, the pretty one.
1252
01:16:40,375 --> 01:16:41,844
- My Lucy.
- She's your girlfriend?
1253
01:16:41,878 --> 01:16:42,946
Yes, all right,
I know I'm punching
1254
01:16:42,978 --> 01:16:43,979
but where...
where is she?
1255
01:16:44,012 --> 01:16:45,314
She left
five minutes ago.
1256
01:16:45,347 --> 01:16:46,448
Where did she go?
1257
01:16:46,482 --> 01:16:48,150
Piazza Della Liberta.
1258
01:16:48,984 --> 01:16:49,852
How do I get there?
1259
01:16:49,886 --> 01:16:51,320
Walk out, turn left,
1260
01:16:51,353 --> 01:16:52,922
at the end of the street,
turn right
1261
01:16:52,956 --> 01:16:54,790
and then it's about
four blocks from there.
1262
01:16:54,823 --> 01:16:56,458
- You better hurry, though.
- Thank you.
1263
01:16:57,961 --> 01:16:59,461
Don't lose her, mate.
1264
01:17:05,601 --> 01:17:08,270
♪ Been here
once or twice
1265
01:17:08,303 --> 01:17:11,039
♪ Never seen you
Let's decide
1266
01:17:11,073 --> 01:17:13,575
♪ Though I hope
1267
01:17:13,609 --> 01:17:16,144
♪ So I hope
1268
01:17:22,317 --> 01:17:25,153
♪ Still, something
Just right
1269
01:17:25,187 --> 01:17:27,823
♪ Won't find out,
We'll see what happens
1270
01:17:27,856 --> 01:17:30,158
♪ Though I hope
1271
01:17:30,592 --> 01:17:32,896
♪ So I hope
1272
01:17:33,729 --> 01:17:35,564
♪ Oh
1273
01:17:36,331 --> 01:17:38,500
♪ You're still
The one I want
1274
01:17:38,534 --> 01:17:41,503
♪ Yeah, it's been
This way too long
1275
01:17:41,537 --> 01:17:44,039
♪ I'll give you
Everything
1276
01:17:44,072 --> 01:17:46,876
♪ I'll give you
Everything
1277
01:17:47,877 --> 01:17:49,811
♪ Past the point,
I know
1278
01:17:49,845 --> 01:17:52,814
♪ But it seems
I've gone too far
1279
01:17:52,848 --> 01:17:55,250
♪ I'll give you
Everything
1280
01:17:55,284 --> 01:17:56,218
Lucy!
1281
01:17:56,251 --> 01:17:57,386
♪ I'll give you everything
1282
01:17:58,320 --> 01:17:59,221
Lucy!
1283
01:18:01,256 --> 01:18:02,524
Lucy.
1284
01:18:18,574 --> 01:18:19,408
Chris?
1285
01:18:22,778 --> 01:18:23,947
Lucy.
1286
01:18:29,919 --> 01:18:31,320
How did you find me?
1287
01:18:32,754 --> 01:18:34,323
We were staying
at the same hostel.
1288
01:18:35,390 --> 01:18:36,926
- Really?
- Yeah.
1289
01:18:38,627 --> 01:18:40,029
Oh, my God!
1290
01:18:40,063 --> 01:18:41,797
You were the drunk guy
from last night.
1291
01:18:41,830 --> 01:18:43,599
Guilty.
1292
01:18:43,632 --> 01:18:45,467
You were the drunk
guy who flirted
1293
01:18:45,500 --> 01:18:47,202
with the receptionist,
again.
1294
01:18:47,235 --> 01:18:49,104
That hag?
Not my cup of tea.
1295
01:18:49,137 --> 01:18:51,306
No. She's really
not your type, is she?
1296
01:18:51,340 --> 01:18:53,175
Look, you're my type.
1297
01:18:54,810 --> 01:18:56,612
Do you want to kneel down
or shall I get up?
1298
01:18:57,546 --> 01:18:58,948
What do you think?
1299
01:18:59,481 --> 01:19:00,549
I'll get up.
1300
01:19:05,520 --> 01:19:06,990
Oh!
1301
01:19:10,726 --> 01:19:12,194
I don't want
to let go.
1302
01:19:13,997 --> 01:19:15,497
You might
run off again.
1303
01:19:20,003 --> 01:19:21,837
You're not gonna
run off, are you?
1304
01:19:30,846 --> 01:19:32,347
I've been thinking.
1305
01:19:34,216 --> 01:19:36,284
I'm sorry for acting
like such a...
1306
01:19:37,319 --> 01:19:39,122
A twat.
1307
01:19:39,154 --> 01:19:40,455
What's twat
in Italian?
1308
01:19:41,523 --> 01:19:42,357
Twat.
1309
01:19:43,158 --> 01:19:44,159
Is it?
1310
01:19:45,260 --> 01:19:48,563
So, um...
I've been everywhere.
1311
01:19:50,432 --> 01:19:51,533
On my own.
1312
01:19:52,401 --> 01:19:53,535
But I brought me bag.
1313
01:19:55,537 --> 01:19:57,073
- How is your bag?
- It's fine.
1314
01:19:57,773 --> 01:19:59,108
Nice. Good.
1315
01:20:00,809 --> 01:20:02,210
How you've been?
1316
01:20:03,178 --> 01:20:04,212
Been okay.
1317
01:20:05,114 --> 01:20:06,548
You look
like you have.
1318
01:20:07,349 --> 01:20:08,985
Me.
1319
01:20:10,153 --> 01:20:12,421
Made friends
with a little old lady.
1320
01:20:12,454 --> 01:20:13,689
Had a good old chat.
1321
01:20:13,722 --> 01:20:15,490
Told her
all about you.
1322
01:20:16,591 --> 01:20:18,027
She was nice.
1323
01:20:18,794 --> 01:20:20,495
Had a ride on a gondolier.
1324
01:20:21,663 --> 01:20:23,032
Sing a song with a guy.
1325
01:20:24,399 --> 01:20:25,834
Ate a couple of pizzas.
1326
01:20:28,537 --> 01:20:30,106
Jesus Christ!
Listen to me.
1327
01:20:31,807 --> 01:20:33,608
Me, me, me.
1328
01:20:35,544 --> 01:20:36,578
I'm sorry.
1329
01:20:39,481 --> 01:20:40,983
I'm sorry I'm such an idiot.
1330
01:20:45,320 --> 01:20:46,388
Yeah.
1331
01:20:48,891 --> 01:20:50,325
But you're my idiot.
1332
01:20:52,828 --> 01:20:54,296
Am I?
1333
01:20:56,231 --> 01:20:57,232
Yeah.
1334
01:20:58,901 --> 01:21:00,469
And look, we...
1335
01:21:00,502 --> 01:21:02,838
Neither of us should be
doing this on our own.
1336
01:21:04,406 --> 01:21:05,841
This trip was meant
to be about...
1337
01:21:05,874 --> 01:21:07,275
You haven't been
on your own, though.
1338
01:21:08,443 --> 01:21:09,478
What?
1339
01:21:10,312 --> 01:21:12,447
I found
the pregnancy test.
1340
01:21:13,916 --> 01:21:15,151
It was yours, wasn't it?
1341
01:21:17,120 --> 01:21:17,954
Yeah.
1342
01:21:19,554 --> 01:21:20,756
Yeah, it's mine.
1343
01:21:20,789 --> 01:21:22,125
Holy shit!
1344
01:21:23,092 --> 01:21:26,162
Does that mean we
gonna be, like, parents?
1345
01:21:26,195 --> 01:21:28,396
- Yeah.
- Proper adults.
1346
01:21:29,232 --> 01:21:30,133
Yup.
1347
01:21:30,166 --> 01:21:31,633
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1348
01:21:31,666 --> 01:21:33,435
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1349
01:21:33,468 --> 01:21:34,971
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1350
01:21:37,806 --> 01:21:39,708
Oh, sorry.
1351
01:21:39,741 --> 01:21:40,977
Watch out.
1352
01:21:41,010 --> 01:21:42,879
Chris, it's literally
like a raisin right now.
1353
01:21:42,912 --> 01:21:45,148
I know, but I sat
on a raisin once.
1354
01:21:46,249 --> 01:21:47,884
And I'm gonna
protect that raisin.
1355
01:21:50,119 --> 01:21:52,821
I'm gonna start tucking
my shirts in.
1356
01:21:52,854 --> 01:21:55,323
- Brilliant.
- Well, it is.
1357
01:21:56,625 --> 01:21:58,493
I want to be
a good dad.
1358
01:21:58,527 --> 01:22:00,796
That's what
good dads do.
1359
01:22:00,829 --> 01:22:02,864
I know you don't
believe that now, but...
1360
01:22:02,899 --> 01:22:04,466
- There's two of...
- No. I do.
1361
01:22:05,767 --> 01:22:07,003
I believe that.
1362
01:22:07,502 --> 01:22:09,738
- You do?
- Yeah.
1363
01:22:09,771 --> 01:22:11,974
Of course I do.
Come here.
1364
01:22:21,184 --> 01:22:22,484
Sorry I'm such a dick.
1365
01:22:22,517 --> 01:22:25,087
Oh!
It's okay.
1366
01:22:25,121 --> 01:22:27,622
It's not okay.
It's not okay.
1367
01:22:29,391 --> 01:22:33,196
It's not okay to be a dick
to something so good.
1368
01:22:36,165 --> 01:22:38,567
My dick days are over.
1369
01:22:39,768 --> 01:22:41,336
Maybe let's work
on that. Shall we?
1370
01:22:43,906 --> 01:22:45,407
So what do we do now?
1371
01:22:49,811 --> 01:22:51,214
Let's just make tracks.
1372
01:22:52,848 --> 01:22:54,917
What? What does that mean?
1373
01:22:55,617 --> 01:22:57,920
You know,
let's make tracks.
1374
01:22:57,954 --> 01:22:59,322
I've never heard
that before.
1375
01:22:59,354 --> 01:23:00,388
Of course you have.
1376
01:23:00,422 --> 01:23:02,490
I've literally never heard
anyone say that, ever.
1377
01:23:02,524 --> 01:23:03,926
Well, it's a saying, isn't it?
1378
01:23:03,960 --> 01:23:07,163
No. Let's make like sheep
and get the flock out of here.
1379
01:23:07,196 --> 01:23:09,065
- That's a saying.
- Okay.
1380
01:23:09,098 --> 01:23:10,266
Let's mate
like a tampon
1381
01:23:10,299 --> 01:23:11,334
and get out
of this bloody hole...
1382
01:23:11,366 --> 01:23:13,269
- Oh, my God! Chris.
- That's a saying.
1383
01:23:14,136 --> 01:23:15,637
Let's make
like a donkey dick
1384
01:23:15,670 --> 01:23:16,872
and hit the road.
1385
01:23:16,906 --> 01:23:18,673
Okay. I get it.
1386
01:23:18,707 --> 01:23:20,076
Let's make like a tree
and leave.
1387
01:23:20,109 --> 01:23:22,577
- Chris?
- Let's make tracks?
1388
01:23:23,578 --> 01:23:25,081
What a load of shit.
1389
01:23:29,584 --> 01:23:32,021
♪ Long hot days
1390
01:23:32,054 --> 01:23:35,423
♪ In the shade
Of some big old tree
1391
01:23:36,725 --> 01:23:38,160
♪ Making daisy chains
1392
01:23:38,194 --> 01:23:41,364
♪ And watching
All the honey bees
1393
01:23:44,100 --> 01:23:46,635
♪ Endless nights
1394
01:23:46,668 --> 01:23:50,339
♪ Underneath starry skies
1395
01:23:51,207 --> 01:23:53,009
♪ Everyday is summer
1396
01:23:53,042 --> 01:23:55,477
♪ When you spend it
Here with me
1397
01:24:05,187 --> 01:24:08,190
♪ So I call you up
1398
01:24:08,224 --> 01:24:11,493
♪ Whenever I'm
Feeling down
1399
01:24:12,228 --> 01:24:15,197
♪ 'Cause it feels so good
1400
01:24:15,231 --> 01:24:17,900
♪ Just to have you around
1401
01:24:19,601 --> 01:24:22,437
♪ And you might not be
1402
01:24:22,470 --> 01:24:26,841
♪ The richest boy
in this town
1403
01:24:26,876 --> 01:24:29,678
♪ But it feels so good
1404
01:24:29,711 --> 01:24:32,214
♪ Just to have you around
1405
01:24:34,183 --> 01:24:39,355
♪ Yeah it feels so good
Just to have you around
1406
01:24:41,623 --> 01:24:48,596
♪ Now yesterday
Is all but a distant dream
1407
01:24:48,630 --> 01:24:53,235
♪ Tomorrow hasn't happened yet
So let's just wait and see
1408
01:24:55,770 --> 01:24:58,840
♪ Because we're here
right now
1409
01:24:58,873 --> 01:25:03,179
♪ It's all that I'll ever
Need anyhow
1410
01:25:03,212 --> 01:25:07,984
♪ Being in the present with you
Lord I'm so free
1411
01:25:10,019 --> 01:25:12,955
♪ And I'll call you up
1412
01:25:12,989 --> 01:25:17,126
♪ Whenever I'm
Feeling down
1413
01:25:17,159 --> 01:25:22,431
♪ 'Cause it feels so good
Just to have you around
1414
01:25:24,799 --> 01:25:27,269
♪ And you might not be
1415
01:25:27,303 --> 01:25:31,539
♪ The smartest boy
In this crowd
1416
01:25:31,573 --> 01:25:36,544
♪ But it feels so good
Just to have you around
1417
01:25:38,680 --> 01:25:44,320
♪ Yeah it feels so good
Just to have you around
1418
01:25:46,422 --> 01:25:51,327
♪ It feels so good
Just to have you around
1419
01:25:53,162 --> 01:25:58,934
♪ Yeah it feels so good
Just to have you around
1420
01:26:01,070 --> 01:26:05,540
♪ It feels so good
Just to have you around ♪