0 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000 INDOXXI Support dengan like & share :) 1 00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:07,674 [The Dubs' "Chapel of Dreams" playing] 2 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:25,567 ♪ In the chapel of dreams ♪ 3 00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:31,782 ♪ Every dream will come true ♪ 4 00:00:33,951 --> 00:00:39,873 ♪ In the chapel of dreams ♪ 5 00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:47,047 ♪ There's a dream there for you ♪ 6 00:00:48,674 --> 00:00:55,180 ♪ Through the dark of the night ♪ 7 00:00:56,348 --> 00:01:02,354 ♪ Though as strange as it seems ♪ 8 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:10,279 ♪ Every heart finds delight ♪ 9 00:01:10,821 --> 00:01:12,739 [Mom] All right. Let's go. 10 00:01:13,824 --> 00:01:14,825 Doug. 11 00:01:15,784 --> 00:01:16,827 Come on. 12 00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:19,538 [car doors close] 13 00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:20,622 Doug. 14 00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:23,000 He can stay in the car for all I care. 15 00:01:24,793 --> 00:01:26,086 [Doug] You really want to start there? 16 00:01:26,169 --> 00:01:28,630 Nobody cares about my fucked up family. 17 00:01:28,714 --> 00:01:30,674 -Everybody has a fucked up family. -[interviewer] Okay, but-- 18 00:01:30,757 --> 00:01:32,426 There's got to be a better way to start a movie. 19 00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,094 Could you just introduce yourself? 20 00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:37,597 My name is Doug Kenney, and you probably have never heard of me. 21 00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:38,724 Maybe say something like, 22 00:01:38,807 --> 00:01:41,018 "I'm the creative force that redefined comedy." 23 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:43,270 No, that's blowing smoke up my own ass. 24 00:01:43,353 --> 00:01:44,438 I can't do that. 25 00:01:44,521 --> 00:01:47,024 I would say you did redefine comedy for a generation. 26 00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,525 I redefined comedy. Okay. 27 00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:50,611 Yeah, I started The National Lampoon. 28 00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:53,614 I did Animal House. I did Caddyshack, and I-- 29 00:01:54,031 --> 00:01:55,324 Well, that's the main stuff. 30 00:01:55,407 --> 00:01:58,118 What if you say, "I was the man who changed comedy forever, 31 00:01:58,201 --> 00:02:00,370 but I couldn't change myself." 32 00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:02,581 Really? Blow me. 33 00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:05,709 I was the man who changed comedy forever... 34 00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:08,420 but I couldn't change myself. 35 00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,756 -I liked that. That was great. -Oh, fuck. 36 00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:14,509 -We can start at whatever point you want. -Let's start this film at Harvard 37 00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:16,261 'cause that's where the fun stuff was. 38 00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:18,263 Okay. Perfect. We're rolling, so go ahead. 39 00:02:18,347 --> 00:02:20,474 Oh, okay. [clears throat] 40 00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:25,312 [Doug] It was the fall of 1964 when I first met Henry Beard. 41 00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:29,232 Henry was from the right kind of family on the Upper East Side. 42 00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:31,526 He belonged at a place like Harvard. 43 00:02:32,027 --> 00:02:34,780 I was a middle class Midwestern dork. 44 00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:37,741 I got in, but it took a while to fit in. 45 00:02:39,368 --> 00:02:40,786 Doug Kenney, Chagrin Falls. 46 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:43,372 Jesus Christ, not that one. 47 00:02:43,455 --> 00:02:44,331 Ah. 48 00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:47,250 -My name tag is a picture of a penis. -[Henry] Hmm. 49 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:49,294 [laughing] 50 00:02:49,378 --> 00:02:51,671 [Doug] What's up with the Barry Goldwater fan club? 51 00:02:51,755 --> 00:02:54,883 They're double majoring in white collar crime and applied hubris. 52 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:56,176 Oh. 53 00:02:57,719 --> 00:02:58,970 Fuck those guys. 54 00:02:59,054 --> 00:03:00,013 [cheering] 55 00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:06,186 ♪ Louie, Louie, oh, no... ♪ 56 00:03:06,269 --> 00:03:07,312 [man] Doug! 57 00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:10,065 [Doug] The crowd at Wimbledon gasps. He charges the net. 58 00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:15,237 Fucking Lampoon. 59 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:19,157 [Doug] Turns out Henry and I weren't the only troublemakers at Harvard. 60 00:03:19,241 --> 00:03:21,785 We found the rest of them at the campus publication 61 00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:26,456 that had been around for a century, run out of this strange little castle. 62 00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:29,376 This is The Harvard Lampoon, the only place on campus 63 00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:32,712 that a goofy kid from Chagrin Falls can feel like a king. 64 00:03:33,463 --> 00:03:36,758 It's a humor magazine, but mostly an excuse to party. 65 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:41,847 It's where I learned that being funny is how I could fit in and meet girls. 66 00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:45,392 In fact, I met my wife there. We'll get back to her in a minute. 67 00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:48,311 The person who really mattered the most was Henry, 68 00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,814 the oldest guy who was ever a teenager. 69 00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:52,399 -[Doug] Your shot. -Hmm. 70 00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,069 Tough spot. 71 00:03:56,153 --> 00:03:57,404 What most people don't realize 72 00:03:57,487 --> 00:04:00,949 is that sidespin has no appreciable effect on the tangent line 73 00:04:01,032 --> 00:04:03,660 unless the cue ball has sufficient forward roll. 74 00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:09,875 Impressive. 75 00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:12,794 But can you do this? 76 00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:18,800 -Exceptional lift. -It's all in the wrist. 77 00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:20,218 Hmm. 78 00:04:20,343 --> 00:04:21,511 Oh, Henry. 79 00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:25,474 -I think I should, uh... -I think you should... 80 00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:28,977 [Doug] Peter, you look gorgeous. 81 00:04:29,060 --> 00:04:30,979 -Lucy, you'll fill out some day. -Thanks. 82 00:04:31,062 --> 00:04:33,648 -And who is this? -This is Alex. She's a friend of ours. 83 00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:34,691 We take Psych together. 84 00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:36,568 Doug Kenney, Chagrin Falls, Ohio. 85 00:04:36,651 --> 00:04:37,986 Alex Garcia-Mata. 86 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:41,156 A lot of vowels. You know, they are the most sensual of letters. 87 00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:42,073 I did not know that. 88 00:04:42,157 --> 00:04:45,744 So, this is the super-secret castle I've heard so much about? 89 00:04:45,827 --> 00:04:47,621 Would you like to see the dungeon? 90 00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:49,664 How scared should I be? 91 00:04:49,748 --> 00:04:51,583 -Don't worry, you'll be fine. -Reasonably. 92 00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:58,298 [Alex] "Does sex sell magazines?" Huh. 93 00:04:58,381 --> 00:05:00,634 The answer, by the way, is yes. 94 00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:02,719 That's how we afford the finer things here. 95 00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:03,845 Spree-tay? 96 00:05:04,346 --> 00:05:06,348 You don't have to try so hard to impress me. 97 00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:07,390 Oh. 98 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:10,060 If I was trying to impress you, I would just do this. 99 00:05:10,936 --> 00:05:13,730 Oh, my God. That is horrible. [laughs] 100 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:16,191 I learned that from my mom. It's a true story. 101 00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:17,859 -Wow. -You guys should meet. 102 00:05:17,943 --> 00:05:20,320 -Yeah, maybe sometime. -I would like that. 103 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,989 You're not really a preppy, are you? 104 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:25,408 You're not a hippie, either. 105 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:26,660 Well, I'm both. 106 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:28,787 -I'm a prippy. -Mmm. 107 00:05:29,704 --> 00:05:32,499 I think what you are is a kid from Chagrin Falls, Ohio, 108 00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,918 who borrowed his roommate's tuxedo 109 00:05:35,001 --> 00:05:37,420 to look like he grew up on the Upper East Side. 110 00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:39,673 You do? Well, that is... 111 00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:42,551 exactly right. Yeah. 112 00:05:42,634 --> 00:05:44,469 -No, you nailed it, in fact. -[chuckles] 113 00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:45,929 Well, you wear it well. 114 00:05:49,724 --> 00:05:52,185 [door squeaks] 115 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:57,566 I hate to interrupt your mating ritual, but we're about to be adulated upstairs. 116 00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:01,236 -And I know how you feel about adulation. -Oh, remind me how I feel? 117 00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,238 -You like it. -Oh, I love adulation. 118 00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,948 -You love it. -We should go upstairs then. 119 00:06:06,408 --> 00:06:09,160 We call this the William Randolph Hearst staircase. 120 00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:11,288 -It's named after John Updike. -Here they are! 121 00:06:11,913 --> 00:06:13,623 Super-sirs, special guests. 122 00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:17,252 As you know, the parodies that Doug and Henry have been churning out 123 00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:20,213 have paid for everything you drunks are enjoying here tonight. 124 00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:21,506 [cheering] 125 00:06:21,590 --> 00:06:26,011 So it is my honor to unveil their latest, 126 00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:28,305 with apologies to JRR Tolkien, 127 00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,098 hot off the presses, 128 00:06:30,181 --> 00:06:33,101 -Bored of the Rings! -[cheering] 129 00:06:33,184 --> 00:06:35,937 -They wrote a book? -And all of their term papers. 130 00:06:36,021 --> 00:06:37,063 And some of mine. 131 00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:40,275 So, I'm guessing like a speech would be in order at this point. 132 00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:43,528 -Speech! Speech! Speech! Speech! -That's enough. That's enough. 133 00:06:43,612 --> 00:06:45,739 Little bit more than that though because I get-- 134 00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,407 [cheering and applause] 135 00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:49,743 Yeah, that's enough. That's enough. Okay. 136 00:06:49,826 --> 00:06:54,456 What is it about filling 200 pages with atrocious Lord of the Rings puns 137 00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:57,709 that feels so right and yet Saur-on? 138 00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:01,504 I'm sorry, once I start punning about these little guys, 139 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,632 it's tough to kick the hobbit. 140 00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:04,841 [crowd groans] 141 00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:08,136 That was bad, but we only have our elves to blame. 142 00:07:08,219 --> 00:07:11,681 Okay. Okay, always leave them wanting more... dor. 143 00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:13,224 [crowd boos] 144 00:07:13,308 --> 00:07:14,726 Pretty good. It was pretty good. 145 00:07:14,809 --> 00:07:16,269 Or fantastic. 146 00:07:27,989 --> 00:07:30,200 That's what I call a book party. 147 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,953 Things get crazy when the jackets come off. 148 00:07:33,036 --> 00:07:34,329 Hmm? 149 00:07:34,412 --> 00:07:36,289 Jackets. Book jackets? 150 00:07:37,666 --> 00:07:40,543 That's the kind of joke that would slay 'em at the legion hall back home. 151 00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:44,714 -That's what you call a book party. -That's what I call a book party. 152 00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:48,093 -If the book is How to Ruin a Castle. -No, it's not. 153 00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:53,431 We had a fine run here, you and I. 154 00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:56,351 You got in. 155 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:58,478 Columbia? Georgetown? 156 00:07:58,561 --> 00:08:00,355 Both. All of them. 157 00:08:01,064 --> 00:08:03,483 I guess law school's not that hard to get into. 158 00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:06,444 Yeah. I'm almost done with my applications, too. 159 00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:09,239 Just need to find a pen, paper. 160 00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:13,410 So I guess the comedy train is rolling to a halt. 161 00:08:14,786 --> 00:08:16,413 I'm gonna miss this place. 162 00:08:16,871 --> 00:08:18,415 -Hmm. -Yeah. 163 00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:20,709 [Doug] I said I just need to find a pen, Mom. 164 00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:24,421 Doug, this is serious. You didn't apply anywhere? 165 00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:25,880 For the love of Christ. 166 00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:28,842 -I've been busy. I did write a book. -Most of a book. 167 00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:31,845 Well, Henry helped... with the spelling. Uh, did you like it? 168 00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:35,473 -She didn't read it. -The book? Yes, it's very nice. 169 00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:37,142 Um... 170 00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:40,061 Interesting cover. 171 00:08:40,145 --> 00:08:41,187 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 172 00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:42,772 -Loves the cover. -How is Henry? 173 00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,941 -He's going to law school, that's how. -Henry's okay. 174 00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:48,278 We were supposed to hang out today, but he got arrested. Arson again. 175 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:49,195 It's the gentleman's crime. 176 00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:50,613 -[Mom] What? -I have to bail him out. 177 00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:52,782 -Doug, is that a joke? -Doug, is that a joke? 178 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,325 Here, give me this. Give me this. 179 00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:56,244 -Doug. -Hey, Dad. 180 00:08:56,327 --> 00:08:57,954 -What'd you think of the book? -He didn't read it. 181 00:08:58,038 --> 00:08:59,247 It's very nice. Listen. 182 00:08:59,330 --> 00:09:01,541 You got a month till graduation, and we're still waiting to hear. 183 00:09:01,624 --> 00:09:03,543 Do you have any kind of plan? [chuckles] 184 00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:06,337 I mean, we spent a lot of money to get what? An English degree? 185 00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:07,839 Harvard education and you throw it all away. 186 00:09:07,922 --> 00:09:10,341 -[sighs] -What's your plan, Doug? 187 00:09:10,425 --> 00:09:12,135 We can't take care of you anymore. 188 00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:15,221 There's a war going on. You want to wait to get picked in the draft? 189 00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:17,807 Or do you want to graduate Harvard and then move back home, 190 00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:19,267 teach tennis with me at the club? 191 00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:22,228 If I teach, do I have to wear shorts? 'Cause that's a deal-breaker. 192 00:09:22,312 --> 00:09:23,146 What do you want? 193 00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:25,523 You want to write your little joke books your whole life? 194 00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:29,194 -Hello, Doug? -I'll just keep doing The Lampoon. 195 00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:31,446 -What? -What? 196 00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:33,073 If you think I'm gonna pay for another year of college-- 197 00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:35,325 No, no, no. I'm gonna start a real magazine. 198 00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:37,160 A national one, with Henry. 199 00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:39,287 -I'm not doing that. -I don't have all the details, 200 00:09:39,370 --> 00:09:41,623 but Henry does have a few questions about his backhand. 201 00:09:41,706 --> 00:09:43,875 Come on. He needs help with the topspin. 202 00:09:44,542 --> 00:09:46,753 -Yes, Mr. Kenney, hello. -Yeah, hi, Henry. 203 00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:50,256 -Well, I usually play on clay, you see. -Yeah, on a hard court, you-- 204 00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:52,300 Strike one. 205 00:09:52,383 --> 00:09:54,427 [Henry] You want me to put off law school for some half-assed scheme? 206 00:09:54,511 --> 00:09:58,139 Oh, this scheme is full-assed. Why settle for real jobs? 207 00:09:58,223 --> 00:10:00,517 You know, just wind up behind a desk somewhere? 208 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:02,227 You know, a magazine needs desks. 209 00:10:02,310 --> 00:10:06,564 The world doesn't need more lawyers or insurance executives or doctors. 210 00:10:06,648 --> 00:10:11,152 I mean, yeah, okay, it needs doctors. Thousands. But it also needs us. 211 00:10:11,236 --> 00:10:12,821 [umpire] Strike two. 212 00:10:12,904 --> 00:10:16,658 Seriously? You assholes are gonna have kids play for you the whole game? 213 00:10:16,741 --> 00:10:18,326 [Henry] A magazine's a tough business, Doug. 214 00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:20,578 You want to be a writer, write a novel on the side, 215 00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:22,789 something your parents can show off on their credenza. 216 00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:25,291 I don't need to impress my parents or their credenza. 217 00:10:25,375 --> 00:10:27,836 -[grunts] -Strike three! 218 00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:29,546 The kid's got an arm. 219 00:10:30,004 --> 00:10:31,214 [Henry] Nice job, guys. 220 00:10:32,090 --> 00:10:34,300 I have things I want to do with my life. 221 00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:36,970 No, you have things you think you're supposed to do. 222 00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:39,764 What you want to do is keep on doing The Lampoon. 223 00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:41,808 -Oh, Biomechanics of the Human Bladder. - Thanks. 224 00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:43,434 I've been looking everywhere for that. 225 00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:47,814 You want me to give up a career in law to rely on you 226 00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:50,775 and start a humor magazine which will undoubtedly fail. 227 00:10:50,859 --> 00:10:53,570 It won't. Or it might. It might. 228 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:56,823 -But this will be big. I can feel it. -How big? 229 00:10:56,906 --> 00:10:57,949 This big. 230 00:10:58,032 --> 00:11:00,743 You're thinking too small. It should be a big magazine size. 231 00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:03,746 See? That's better. I threw something out, you made it better. 232 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,374 That's our partnership. You don't want to throw that away. 233 00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:09,878 If we're running our own magazine, we can do anything we want. 234 00:11:09,961 --> 00:11:12,172 -We could publish knock-knock jokes. -Knock knock. 235 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:13,298 -Who's there? -Me. 236 00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:14,757 -Me who? -Me not doing the magazine. 237 00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:17,719 -That can go in issue one. -Let me ask you this: 238 00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:20,680 with The Harvard Lampoon, how many deadlines have we missed? 239 00:11:21,264 --> 00:11:22,181 -None. -All of them. 240 00:11:22,265 --> 00:11:23,933 -All of them? -We've never made a deadline. 241 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:25,852 You really don't think you can rely on me? 242 00:11:25,935 --> 00:11:27,437 -No. -I challenge you, 243 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,188 name a thousand times I let you down. 244 00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,983 -Number one-- -Okay, that's not the point. 245 00:11:32,066 --> 00:11:35,153 Look, I know it's risky, okay, but why let it end here? 246 00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:38,323 The truth is I can't do this without you, man. 247 00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:41,159 -Half the time I feel like a fraud. -And the other half? 248 00:11:41,242 --> 00:11:44,037 The other half, I feel like the second-smartest guy in the room. 249 00:11:45,455 --> 00:11:46,414 I'm the smartest? 250 00:11:46,497 --> 00:11:47,540 Yeah. 251 00:11:48,291 --> 00:11:50,543 I promise you, it'll be fun. 252 00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:54,464 And the day that it stops being fun, we'll walk away. 253 00:11:58,927 --> 00:12:00,053 -Tempting. -[claps] 254 00:12:00,136 --> 00:12:01,971 Tempting. Yes! 255 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:04,849 [Dyke and the Blazers' "Funky Broadway Part One" playing] 256 00:12:07,101 --> 00:12:08,102 ♪ Yeah ♪ 257 00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:09,854 ♪ Come on now ♪ 258 00:12:11,606 --> 00:12:15,818 ♪ Yeah, come on, baby ♪ 259 00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:17,862 ♪ Let me tell you ♪ 260 00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:18,947 ♪ Now, now... ♪ 261 00:12:19,030 --> 00:12:22,075 I looked at your proposal for Harvard Lampoon. 262 00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:23,534 National Lampoon. 263 00:12:23,618 --> 00:12:25,620 We would license the Lampoon name from Harvard. 264 00:12:25,703 --> 00:12:28,581 As we say in the proposal, there is a huge underserved audience 265 00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:30,416 for comedy that speaks to our generation. 266 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:34,462 Oh, and you think that's what this country needs is a comedy magazine. 267 00:12:34,545 --> 00:12:37,048 Kids need something to read while getting tear-gassed. 268 00:12:38,216 --> 00:12:39,050 Ha. 269 00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:42,053 [man] Shouldn't Harvard boys like you be working on Wall Street 270 00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:44,639 or at some law firm that overcharges me? 271 00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:46,641 What do you want to do with your life? 272 00:12:46,724 --> 00:12:49,811 There's a vast gap between Mad magazine and the New Yorker -- 273 00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:51,270 I'm gonna stop you right here. 274 00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:53,189 -Okay. -I don't want to waste your time. 275 00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:56,109 -I don't want to waste your time. -We don't want to waste your time. 276 00:12:56,192 --> 00:12:59,445 We publish Life, Fortune, Sports Illustrated. 277 00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:00,446 Right. 278 00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:02,073 Magazines about what people are interested in. 279 00:13:02,156 --> 00:13:03,700 There's no business here. 280 00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:06,953 You'll never sell a magazine. No one will ever go to a newsstand. 281 00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:08,204 [Henry] I-- I disagree. 282 00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:11,791 Our Time parody, right there, sold over half a million copies. 283 00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:14,752 -Bored of the Rings sold even more-- -They don't want to waste our time. 284 00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:17,505 Obviously, this Lampoon thing is not gonna fly here. 285 00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:21,426 So, let's talk about our other idea, huh? 286 00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:26,139 Huh? You want to go first or should I? 287 00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:27,724 -You should take it. -Okay. 288 00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:30,059 Sandwiches. 289 00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:33,479 -I'm sorry? -Modern Sandwich. 290 00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:38,192 A monthly magazine devoted to sandwiches and the sandwich lifestyle. 291 00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:39,569 Henry's idea. 292 00:13:40,862 --> 00:13:44,032 Hey, we are a country divided in so many ways: 293 00:13:44,115 --> 00:13:47,326 politically, economically, geographically. 294 00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:50,455 But two slices of bread, some meat, a condiment or two? 295 00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:52,206 That's something we can all agree on. Right, Jim? 296 00:13:52,290 --> 00:13:54,417 -I'm Frank. -Let's all be frank. 297 00:13:54,500 --> 00:14:00,089 There is a huge under-served audience for investigative sandwich journalism. 298 00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:03,468 I-- You know, why is it so hard to find a good tomato? 299 00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:06,095 Are club sandwiches too exclusive? 300 00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:07,180 Modern Sandwich! 301 00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:10,475 We'll run short fiction and shorter recipes. 302 00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:13,644 Show pictures of pickles and things that look like pickles, 303 00:14:13,728 --> 00:14:15,480 because Jim, other Jim, 304 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,815 -let's open-face it-- -I don't see the point of this. 305 00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:21,110 The point is, you don't have a fucking clue. 306 00:14:21,903 --> 00:14:25,990 You're the kind of people who commute back and forth from Westport, Connecticut. 307 00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:29,619 And we have nothing to do with you. Fucking pieces of shit. 308 00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,371 [door opens] 309 00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:32,497 [door slams shut] 310 00:14:33,456 --> 00:14:34,832 You have our information. 311 00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:38,795 Oh. 312 00:14:40,254 --> 00:14:41,464 I'm gonna take it. 313 00:14:43,674 --> 00:14:45,802 [Henry] That one, I would say, was less promising. 314 00:14:45,885 --> 00:14:47,512 Maybe we need to rethink our pitch. 315 00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:50,431 Fuck those guys, you know? They're just like my dad. 316 00:14:50,515 --> 00:14:53,643 They jerk off to Eisenhower biographies. 317 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,479 Yes, but, and this is what I love about them, 318 00:14:56,562 --> 00:14:57,605 they have money. 319 00:14:57,688 --> 00:15:02,276 So can we please just pretend for a second that they and we are on the same side 320 00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:03,945 until after the check clears. 321 00:15:05,363 --> 00:15:07,490 Fine, who's next? 322 00:15:07,698 --> 00:15:09,409 Hmm. Last stop. 323 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:13,913 We've come to you first 324 00:15:13,996 --> 00:15:17,125 because we are so impressed by what you've built with your magazine. 325 00:15:17,208 --> 00:15:18,709 [Doug] Yogurt instead of sour cream. 326 00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:20,670 So simple, yet so brilliant. 327 00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:23,631 You know, they said a Weight Watcher's magazine would never work. 328 00:15:23,714 --> 00:15:26,592 Now we're moving 500,000 copies a month. 329 00:15:27,051 --> 00:15:28,261 God bless the fatties. 330 00:15:28,344 --> 00:15:29,470 -God bless 'em. -Yes. 331 00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:32,390 -Listen, I don't want to waste your time. -[sighs] Here we go. 332 00:15:32,473 --> 00:15:36,185 Most magazines fail within the first year. And a laugh rag? 333 00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,312 Even Hefner couldn't make that work. 334 00:15:38,396 --> 00:15:40,898 Okay. Look, Mr. Simmons. Matty. 335 00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:43,901 The truth is, we've already got some offers from the big publishers. 336 00:15:43,985 --> 00:15:46,821 -Your friend just said I was the first-- -No, I was-- 337 00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:50,533 But you're our choice to publish a National Lampoon. 338 00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:51,576 -Yeah. -Yes. 339 00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:53,661 The big publishers, they don't get the youth market. 340 00:15:53,744 --> 00:15:55,204 And we checked around, they said, 341 00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:59,292 "Hey, you want funny, you go to Matty Simmons because he gets funny." 342 00:15:59,917 --> 00:16:01,043 They said that? 343 00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:02,753 Every single one. 344 00:16:03,254 --> 00:16:06,424 You know, I used to write one-liners for Walter Winchell. 345 00:16:06,757 --> 00:16:08,801 We wuv Winchell. 346 00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:10,720 -[Matty] Hmm. -Yeah. Hey. 347 00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:18,144 [Doug] We were in business, with contracts and everything, 348 00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:19,479 like real grown-ups. 349 00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:22,148 And remember Alex from Harvard? 350 00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:23,983 Beautiful, out of my league? 351 00:16:24,066 --> 00:16:26,402 Well, we got married and moved in together. 352 00:16:26,486 --> 00:16:28,821 I promised it'd be the two of us against the world. 353 00:16:28,905 --> 00:16:29,780 It's charming. 354 00:16:29,864 --> 00:16:32,450 It may not be the palatial estate you grew up in. 355 00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,035 You know I don't care about that. 356 00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:37,371 There's no jockeys' quarters or chocolate covered chandeliers-- 357 00:16:37,455 --> 00:16:39,832 There's still no running water. Toilet's a mess. 358 00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:43,753 What is Henry doing here? 359 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,463 -He lives here. -We live here. 360 00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:47,006 It's fun, right? 361 00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:52,261 Look, it's not ideal right now, 362 00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:54,597 but hopefully we'll build the business up over time, 363 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:58,392 and in five years, Matty has to buy our share of the magazine, okay? 364 00:16:58,476 --> 00:17:00,728 And then we can each afford our own apartment. 365 00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:03,940 And don't worry, Henry and I will wave to you from across the park. 366 00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:05,525 [chuckles] Okay. 367 00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,276 Fine. 368 00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:10,738 But can the two of us at least try to have fun now, 369 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:12,698 not wait five years to be happy? 370 00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:17,620 Of course. First few months will be crazy busy, but I'll pencil you in. 371 00:17:26,587 --> 00:17:27,421 [sighs] 372 00:17:28,214 --> 00:17:32,093 Two pencils and a pad of paper. That's all Matty said we could afford. 373 00:17:32,176 --> 00:17:34,929 Well, then. Please, I insist. 374 00:17:35,513 --> 00:17:37,348 -Oh, thank you. -You're welcome. 375 00:17:37,431 --> 00:17:39,016 Hey, thank you. 376 00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:40,351 No, thank you. 377 00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:44,063 -No, I think I thanked you first and-- -Well, I think I'm a little more thankful. 378 00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,898 -But thank you. -Okay, well... 379 00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:47,984 [Doug] Did you do something new with your hair today? 380 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:50,903 Can you blame me? We called her Mary Marshmallow 381 00:17:50,987 --> 00:17:52,613 because of her enormous breasts. 382 00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:54,073 They were like marshmallows. 383 00:17:55,533 --> 00:17:57,159 Hey, what are you up to later? 384 00:17:58,411 --> 00:18:02,039 What! So he's a charming stud, and I'm a dirty old man? That's ageism! 385 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,084 Hey, man. 386 00:18:08,004 --> 00:18:10,047 Those are the art directors you hired? 387 00:18:10,131 --> 00:18:12,216 They're cool. They know R. Crumb. 388 00:18:13,009 --> 00:18:15,386 So, day one. 389 00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:18,139 -Let's get started, huh? -Yeah. 390 00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:21,017 Ideas for a magazine. 391 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:23,019 Fill up a magazine with words and sentences. 392 00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:26,814 -Humorous. Humorous magazine. -Preferably funny. Preferably funny. 393 00:18:27,690 --> 00:18:29,483 [trills lips] 394 00:18:32,862 --> 00:18:34,447 I'm gonna write down "comedy." 395 00:18:34,989 --> 00:18:37,908 That's good. Let's build on that. 396 00:18:38,534 --> 00:18:40,369 I bet Chris and George have a few ideas. 397 00:18:40,703 --> 00:18:43,289 Maybe we should find some writers who didn't go to Harvard. 398 00:18:44,248 --> 00:18:47,335 I'm sorry, I don't quite understand. You mean like a Yalie? 399 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:48,919 [Doug] Oh, they were out there. 400 00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:50,796 One of the first guys we brought on board 401 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:53,466 wrote dirty comic strips for underground papers 402 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,301 and aspired to be the Antichrist. 403 00:18:55,384 --> 00:18:58,304 I am going to send you a canister of nerve gas 404 00:18:58,387 --> 00:19:01,390 that will explode upon opening, you mongoloid twat! 405 00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:06,520 You sent me the wrong records. 406 00:19:07,271 --> 00:19:09,565 You're the Columbia Fucking Record Club! 407 00:19:15,029 --> 00:19:18,157 [Doug] We had a comedian from England named Tony Hendra. 408 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,785 Mr. Sullivan would find jokes about the Tet Offensive. 409 00:19:20,868 --> 00:19:22,495 -Don't you say it. -Offensive? 410 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:26,999 Do you know what I find offensive? Being a traitor to one's generation. 411 00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:31,921 Know what? I am done sucking chuckles from blue-haired septuagenarians. 412 00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:35,216 Tell Mr. Sullivan he can take his bloody show and shove it. 413 00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:40,262 [Doug] Then there was a woman who managed to crash our little boy's club. 414 00:19:40,346 --> 00:19:43,307 A refugee from the advertising world, Anne Beatts. 415 00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:46,268 Hey, baby! Why don't you bring those jugs back around? 416 00:19:46,352 --> 00:19:48,604 [chuckling] 417 00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:52,149 [Doug] She was tough. She had to be to deal with all our caveman bullshit. 418 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:53,776 [Anne] Look at you. 419 00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:55,277 Where'd you get those pecs, butch? 420 00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:57,780 Come on, little juicy buns, huh? 421 00:19:57,863 --> 00:20:00,032 Mmm, mmm, mmm. Come on, spin around. 422 00:20:00,116 --> 00:20:03,369 -Let me see that ass. Show Mama that ass. -What? No. 423 00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,038 Sorry, I was just trying to prove a point. 424 00:20:07,123 --> 00:20:09,542 To show there's no hard feelings, let me give you a hand job. 425 00:20:09,625 --> 00:20:11,085 [man] Whoa. 426 00:20:11,168 --> 00:20:12,002 Really? 427 00:20:12,086 --> 00:20:13,254 [chuckles] 428 00:20:13,337 --> 00:20:14,964 [men laugh] 429 00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:19,844 Excuse me? Story idea, Amish in Space. 430 00:20:20,803 --> 00:20:21,971 Hmm? 431 00:20:22,054 --> 00:20:23,889 Secret Letters of the Alphabet. 432 00:20:23,973 --> 00:20:25,391 I'll get the check. 433 00:20:25,975 --> 00:20:28,644 [Doug] Brian McConnachie. Straight-up weirdo. 434 00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:30,354 Brian made more sense 435 00:20:30,438 --> 00:20:34,442 once you understood that he came to us from the planet Mogdar. 436 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:38,028 We also had Sean Kelly, Rick Meyerowitz. 437 00:20:38,112 --> 00:20:39,989 So many great contributors. 438 00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:43,784 But four is all that really fit our story, so I'm sorry, guys. 439 00:20:43,868 --> 00:20:45,119 Hmm. 440 00:20:45,202 --> 00:20:48,998 You know, maybe if one of you had been black, we could've included you. 441 00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:52,460 So there were no funny black writers in the '70s? 442 00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:54,295 And just one funny woman? 443 00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:58,466 Oh, I'm sure they were out there. It's just that we didn't think to look. 444 00:20:58,549 --> 00:21:00,426 You know, it was a different time. 445 00:21:00,509 --> 00:21:01,469 -Hmm... -Hmm... 446 00:21:01,552 --> 00:21:04,180 In our defense, we also had very few Jews. 447 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:05,973 -Oh. -Oh. 448 00:21:06,056 --> 00:21:07,141 [chatter] 449 00:21:07,224 --> 00:21:09,685 Okay, everyone. Take a seat. Take a seat. 450 00:21:10,436 --> 00:21:11,687 Gather 'round. 451 00:21:11,771 --> 00:21:16,567 Welcome, everyone, to the National Lampoon. 452 00:21:16,650 --> 00:21:17,943 I'm still working on that. 453 00:21:18,027 --> 00:21:20,696 Mm-hmm. We have eight weeks to put out the first issue, 454 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,698 and so far we have... 455 00:21:23,741 --> 00:21:24,950 nothing. 456 00:21:25,034 --> 00:21:27,995 So please remember that there are no bad ideas. 457 00:21:28,412 --> 00:21:31,290 -Apart from ideas we don't like. -Yeah, do not pitch those. 458 00:21:31,373 --> 00:21:33,042 -[Anne] Yeah. -I had a few thoughts. 459 00:21:35,586 --> 00:21:37,129 [Anne] Were we all supposed to bring those? 460 00:21:37,213 --> 00:21:38,923 -[man] Yes. -[Tony] I left mine on the bus. 461 00:21:39,006 --> 00:21:41,217 "Hitler's device for gassing Rube Goldberg." 462 00:21:41,592 --> 00:21:46,055 A Dr. Seuss story concerning the sexual awakening of a young Toucan. 463 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:47,890 A Concrete Jungle Book, 464 00:21:47,973 --> 00:21:52,520 a young white baby comes of age above 125th Street. 465 00:21:52,603 --> 00:21:53,771 That's tempting. 466 00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:57,149 One of those baby books, but for a war baby in Vietnam. 467 00:21:58,234 --> 00:22:00,027 Baby's First Wound, that kind of thing. Adorable. 468 00:22:00,110 --> 00:22:02,863 How about this? The Joys of Wife-Tasting. 469 00:22:02,947 --> 00:22:05,574 This wife has a fruity flavor, exceptional finish. 470 00:22:05,658 --> 00:22:08,160 This wife had a vinegary bouquet. 471 00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:10,454 Tarzan of the Cows. 472 00:22:10,538 --> 00:22:12,581 Nancy Reagan's Dating Dos and Don'ts. 473 00:22:12,665 --> 00:22:15,042 -You're a Good Man, Charlie Manson. -Tempting. 474 00:22:15,125 --> 00:22:18,045 "Upon seeing his condition, Ms. Braddock said, 'Winston, you're drunk.' 475 00:22:18,462 --> 00:22:21,173 Mustering all his dignity, Churchill cocked an eyebrow and rejoined, 476 00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:24,927 with that famous Churchill wit, 'Shove it up your ass, you ugly cunt.'" 477 00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:26,887 [laughing] 478 00:22:26,971 --> 00:22:28,430 [Doug] Yeah, really great, guys. 479 00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:30,558 -Matty, where you going? -That's history. 480 00:22:30,641 --> 00:22:32,810 -Come on! -[Tony] Here's a cover idea. 481 00:22:32,893 --> 00:22:35,312 Nixon with a long wooden nose. 482 00:22:35,396 --> 00:22:36,564 [chuckles] 483 00:22:36,647 --> 00:22:39,316 [chair squeaks] 484 00:22:40,568 --> 00:22:42,570 You know, like Pinocchio. 485 00:22:44,780 --> 00:22:45,948 It's really hard-hitting. 486 00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:47,491 [Doug] Boo! 487 00:22:47,575 --> 00:22:48,701 [laughing] 488 00:22:48,784 --> 00:22:51,829 You know, I hear The Village Voice has very good benefits. 489 00:22:51,912 --> 00:22:54,415 [Doug] We talked about bad ideas. We had a whole conversation-- 490 00:22:54,498 --> 00:22:56,834 -So much for the free exchange of ideas. -[Anne] No, wait, wait, wait! 491 00:22:56,917 --> 00:22:59,211 What if Nixon is just like the emperor? 492 00:22:59,295 --> 00:23:01,297 But he's got no clothes, so-- 493 00:23:01,380 --> 00:23:03,090 [laughing] 494 00:23:03,173 --> 00:23:05,593 What was his name? I've literally already forgotten who that was. 495 00:23:05,676 --> 00:23:08,387 Hey, hey, despite Tony's horrible idea, 496 00:23:08,470 --> 00:23:10,889 I think this magazine is gonna hit it out of the park. 497 00:23:10,973 --> 00:23:11,932 [clamoring] 498 00:23:12,016 --> 00:23:13,100 -[Doug] Come on! -[Brian] Shit. 499 00:23:13,183 --> 00:23:16,228 It's a total failure, we're selling less than half our print run. 500 00:23:16,312 --> 00:23:18,314 And what is with the goddamn duck? 501 00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:20,899 -I never did get the duck. -The duck is our mascot. 502 00:23:20,983 --> 00:23:23,652 Do you know what the cigarette companies are telling me? 503 00:23:23,736 --> 00:23:26,905 "I'm not putting my ad in this underground piece of shit!" 504 00:23:26,989 --> 00:23:28,073 It's ugly! 505 00:23:28,157 --> 00:23:32,369 It makes me physically ill to say this, but I agree with Matty. 506 00:23:32,453 --> 00:23:33,704 [Matty] Thank you, Henry. 507 00:23:37,207 --> 00:23:39,668 Okay, who cares if it's ugly? 508 00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:41,295 Comedy doesn't have to be pretty. 509 00:23:41,378 --> 00:23:42,546 It should be raw. 510 00:23:42,922 --> 00:23:43,756 Fucking rock and roll. 511 00:23:43,839 --> 00:23:45,966 Doug, we have to fire the art directors. 512 00:23:46,467 --> 00:23:48,802 What? But they hang out with David Bowie! 513 00:23:48,886 --> 00:23:52,139 I know that might not impress an heir to Canadian woolen mills-- 514 00:23:52,222 --> 00:23:54,224 -Hurtful. -But their stuff is funny. 515 00:23:54,308 --> 00:23:56,810 No, it looks funny. 516 00:23:56,894 --> 00:23:58,479 Doug, there's a difference. 517 00:24:00,731 --> 00:24:03,942 Matty and I had a meeting with the art director for Family Health. 518 00:24:04,026 --> 00:24:06,695 Oh, Family Health! Oh, that's a funny magazine. 519 00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:08,113 Are you kidding me? 520 00:24:08,197 --> 00:24:09,031 Look. 521 00:24:11,116 --> 00:24:12,493 Okay. What am I looking at? 522 00:24:12,576 --> 00:24:16,330 He redesigned their old material. Straight. Deadpan. 523 00:24:16,413 --> 00:24:18,332 So the art isn't fighting the joke. 524 00:24:18,957 --> 00:24:21,085 This is what your friends down the hall did. 525 00:24:21,168 --> 00:24:22,461 And this is the new guy. 526 00:24:22,586 --> 00:24:23,462 Nostalgia 527 00:24:23,545 --> 00:24:24,797 I see what you're saying. 528 00:24:25,547 --> 00:24:26,590 It is pretty good. 529 00:24:27,925 --> 00:24:29,301 It's better. 530 00:24:32,054 --> 00:24:33,180 And the duck? 531 00:24:33,972 --> 00:24:35,099 No duck. 532 00:24:40,813 --> 00:24:44,024 Tempting. I'm glad you finally saw the light. 533 00:24:44,108 --> 00:24:45,609 I can be very persuasive. 534 00:24:46,568 --> 00:24:47,903 If I fire those guys, 535 00:24:47,986 --> 00:24:50,280 they're gonna make me do so much acid with them. 536 00:24:50,364 --> 00:24:52,366 -Then I'll fire them. -No, I'll do it. 537 00:24:52,449 --> 00:24:54,451 Hey, guys. I got some bad news. 538 00:24:55,828 --> 00:24:56,662 Stay. 539 00:24:56,745 --> 00:24:58,247 Ladies, let's lift those drinks. 540 00:25:01,041 --> 00:25:01,959 Perfect. 541 00:25:05,087 --> 00:25:07,715 No, the arms should be like slightly bent. 542 00:25:22,980 --> 00:25:23,981 [Matty] Kenney, Beard! 543 00:25:24,064 --> 00:25:27,192 We are being sued by Disney for $8 million! 544 00:25:27,276 --> 00:25:29,361 Well, Matty, maybe it wasn't such a hot idea 545 00:25:29,445 --> 00:25:31,363 to have Minnie Mouse flashing her tits. 546 00:25:31,447 --> 00:25:33,073 This was not my idea. 547 00:25:33,157 --> 00:25:34,742 I distinctly remember you saying, 548 00:25:34,825 --> 00:25:38,662 "Boys, it'll be fine, she has pasties on. This is completely my idea." 549 00:25:38,746 --> 00:25:40,038 That does sound like Matty. 550 00:25:40,789 --> 00:25:41,874 You having fun yet? 551 00:25:41,957 --> 00:25:43,959 One could say fun is being had. 552 00:25:45,210 --> 00:25:46,837 Okay, Michael, let's do this. 553 00:25:49,047 --> 00:25:50,799 This is for the magazine, right? 554 00:25:54,928 --> 00:25:59,600 Volkswagen! Volkswagen is suing us for $30 million over your ad. 555 00:26:00,350 --> 00:26:02,311 [chuckles] My ad! 556 00:26:02,394 --> 00:26:04,897 I can't tell you how great it feels to be valued like this. 557 00:26:12,654 --> 00:26:14,615 The Mormons are protesting! 558 00:26:15,365 --> 00:26:16,867 The feminists hate us! 559 00:26:17,743 --> 00:26:20,579 The Catholics. What did we do to the Catholics? 560 00:26:20,662 --> 00:26:22,080 Liza Minnelli? 561 00:26:22,164 --> 00:26:24,291 The American Nazi Party! 562 00:26:25,125 --> 00:26:27,002 Wait, this is fan mail. 563 00:26:27,085 --> 00:26:28,086 [Mary] Such a good boy. 564 00:26:28,170 --> 00:26:31,256 [Doug] He looks too happy. I know that look. That dog is in paradise. 565 00:26:31,340 --> 00:26:33,467 Mary, I have to ask you to step out of the shot. 566 00:26:33,550 --> 00:26:35,844 -You're not gonna hurt him, right? -No, why would I hurt him? 567 00:26:35,928 --> 00:26:37,095 -What are you doing? -Don't worry. 568 00:26:37,179 --> 00:26:38,847 -I don't think there's bullets in there. -Should I fire? 569 00:26:38,931 --> 00:26:40,474 -Step back. -Patches! 570 00:26:41,100 --> 00:26:44,311 ♪ Wanted: young man, single and free ♪ 571 00:26:45,687 --> 00:26:48,816 ♪ Experience in love preferred ♪ 572 00:26:48,899 --> 00:26:51,026 ♪ But we'll accept a young trainee ♪ 573 00:26:51,109 --> 00:26:54,863 ♪ Oh, I'm gonna put it in the want ads ♪ 574 00:26:56,031 --> 00:26:57,950 ♪ I need a love that's true ♪ 575 00:26:58,033 --> 00:27:00,494 ♪ Gonna put it in the want ads... ♪ 576 00:27:00,577 --> 00:27:02,079 [Doug] Kent Cigarettes. 577 00:27:02,162 --> 00:27:03,580 Panasonic Speakers. 578 00:27:03,664 --> 00:27:05,249 I sell dirty books. 579 00:27:05,332 --> 00:27:07,417 Okay. Well, have a seat. 580 00:27:09,336 --> 00:27:11,421 ♪ He tells me he's been lying ♪ 581 00:27:11,505 --> 00:27:13,340 ♪ I'm going to the evening news ♪ 582 00:27:13,423 --> 00:27:16,552 ♪ I'm gonna put it in the want ads ♪ 583 00:27:16,635 --> 00:27:18,554 ♪ I need somebody new ♪ 584 00:27:18,637 --> 00:27:21,473 ♪ I'm gonna put it in the want ads ♪ 585 00:27:21,557 --> 00:27:23,475 ♪ My man and I are through ♪ 586 00:27:23,559 --> 00:27:26,144 ♪ Gonna put it in the want ads ♪ 587 00:27:26,228 --> 00:27:28,939 ♪ Ooh, this girl's in misery ♪ 588 00:27:29,022 --> 00:27:31,316 ♪ Gonna put it in the want ads ♪ 589 00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:34,069 ♪ Please, somebody rescue me ♪ 590 00:27:34,152 --> 00:27:36,405 ♪ Gonna put it in the want ads ♪ 591 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:45,914 I know, I wasn't around. 592 00:27:45,998 --> 00:27:49,585 Sometimes to create something special, you need to stay in the office 593 00:27:49,668 --> 00:27:52,212 as long as it takes to get the work done. 594 00:27:57,009 --> 00:27:57,843 [Henry] Hey. 595 00:27:58,385 --> 00:27:59,261 [Doug] Yeah. 596 00:27:59,344 --> 00:28:01,138 [Henry] I have a confession to make. 597 00:28:02,347 --> 00:28:03,515 When we started, I never thought 598 00:28:03,599 --> 00:28:06,768 it would be much more than the two of us writing jokes. 599 00:28:08,270 --> 00:28:09,438 Now it's turned into... 600 00:28:10,898 --> 00:28:11,940 all this. 601 00:28:13,942 --> 00:28:18,864 But as long as at the center of it, it's you and me working together... 602 00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:29,708 McSorley's is still open. 603 00:28:30,876 --> 00:28:34,212 You want to grab a drink and watch sailors hit on runaway teens? 604 00:28:38,300 --> 00:28:39,426 Doug? 605 00:28:42,054 --> 00:28:43,055 Doug. 606 00:28:59,947 --> 00:29:01,073 This one's funnier. 607 00:29:06,787 --> 00:29:09,831 Is there such a thing as "over the line" to you? 608 00:29:09,915 --> 00:29:12,084 A lot of people think your material goes too far. 609 00:29:12,167 --> 00:29:14,253 Well, a lot of people voted for Nixon. 610 00:29:15,379 --> 00:29:17,673 And I suppose those people aren't "your people." 611 00:29:20,300 --> 00:29:21,969 Is that a marijuana cigarette? 612 00:29:25,597 --> 00:29:26,515 No. 613 00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:32,813 Let's talk about this, the "Sexual Frustration" issue. 614 00:29:32,896 --> 00:29:35,440 There's a picture in here that we can't even show 615 00:29:35,524 --> 00:29:37,985 of a naked black woman. 616 00:29:38,068 --> 00:29:39,236 You mean this? 617 00:29:41,613 --> 00:29:42,906 We'll have to cut that out. 618 00:29:42,990 --> 00:29:44,950 Oh, because of the size of her bush? 619 00:29:45,033 --> 00:29:48,412 Mr. Kenney, it's a fine line between being clever and offensive, isn't it? 620 00:29:48,495 --> 00:29:51,581 Look, if I could just say something in defense of National Lampoon 621 00:29:51,665 --> 00:29:53,417 -for one moment. -Please. 622 00:29:54,042 --> 00:29:56,795 We come from a tradition of truth-tellers. 623 00:29:57,337 --> 00:30:01,591 Long time ago, there was someone else society found offensive. 624 00:30:01,675 --> 00:30:05,387 They thought that what he did was radical, dangerous. 625 00:30:05,470 --> 00:30:08,223 They persecuted him and eventually killed him. 626 00:30:09,016 --> 00:30:10,809 Of course, I'm referring to Dracula. 627 00:30:15,355 --> 00:30:18,775 This is Doug Kenney, folks, of National Lampoon. 628 00:30:18,859 --> 00:30:20,110 That's a humor magazine. 629 00:30:20,819 --> 00:30:22,237 Doing very well. 630 00:30:23,280 --> 00:30:25,157 Maybe we can do something about that. 631 00:30:26,325 --> 00:30:28,118 -You play tennis? -Fuck you. 632 00:30:33,540 --> 00:30:34,458 Wow. 633 00:30:34,875 --> 00:30:35,917 Rough evening? 634 00:30:36,001 --> 00:30:38,712 No, Tony and I swapped vices for the night. 635 00:30:38,795 --> 00:30:42,132 He smoked a joint, and I drank a bottle of port. [sighs] 636 00:30:42,215 --> 00:30:45,385 And what was the result of this highly scientific experiment? 637 00:30:45,469 --> 00:30:48,764 Oh, we attacked a subway cop with a sword. Where'd we get a sword? 638 00:30:48,847 --> 00:30:50,640 He has a deadline tomorrow. 639 00:30:50,724 --> 00:30:53,018 The cop? Don't worry, I'll fill his pages. 640 00:30:53,101 --> 00:30:56,021 That's funny. You're already filling six pages. 641 00:30:56,104 --> 00:30:58,190 So? I can do ten. You know? 642 00:30:58,273 --> 00:31:00,942 Oh, O'Donoghue has this great idea! 643 00:31:01,026 --> 00:31:02,903 He thinks that we should do our own radio show. 644 00:31:02,986 --> 00:31:07,407 Like this 1930s old-timey operation, you know, with sketches and song parodies. 645 00:31:07,491 --> 00:31:08,325 What do you think? 646 00:31:09,326 --> 00:31:10,243 Tempting. 647 00:31:11,203 --> 00:31:13,872 Tempting good or tempting I hate everything about it? 648 00:31:13,955 --> 00:31:15,624 We're barely able to put out a magazine. 649 00:31:15,707 --> 00:31:17,501 Then let's barely be able to do something else. 650 00:31:17,584 --> 00:31:19,211 No, Doug. Radio? 651 00:31:19,878 --> 00:31:21,296 We're literary people. 652 00:31:21,380 --> 00:31:22,506 It'll be fine. 653 00:31:22,589 --> 00:31:24,549 -Don't I always come through? -No. 654 00:31:24,633 --> 00:31:26,510 Well, someday I will. 655 00:31:26,593 --> 00:31:28,929 Are you worried about your little Dougie? 656 00:31:29,012 --> 00:31:30,013 [Alex] I'm worried. 657 00:31:30,806 --> 00:31:32,974 Oh, hey, sweetie! What are you still doing up? 658 00:31:33,058 --> 00:31:34,684 Have you been grading papers? 659 00:31:34,768 --> 00:31:36,770 You're taking on something else. 660 00:31:38,105 --> 00:31:42,859 [scoffs] Well, would you rather I just stop then, not be successful? 661 00:31:43,318 --> 00:31:45,070 You are successful, Doug. 662 00:31:45,612 --> 00:31:47,072 -Alex-- -Good night. 663 00:31:47,781 --> 00:31:50,992 Oh, okay, just for the record, you're the one who's walking away! 664 00:31:56,581 --> 00:31:59,167 You made Mary Marshmallow a managing editor? 665 00:31:59,543 --> 00:32:01,586 Mary's been with us since day one. 666 00:32:01,670 --> 00:32:05,507 She is a secretary who happens to have enormous breasts. 667 00:32:05,590 --> 00:32:06,591 That's just sexist. 668 00:32:06,675 --> 00:32:08,969 You wrote a piece called "Marshmallows" 669 00:32:09,052 --> 00:32:11,721 about people having sex with marshmallows. 670 00:32:12,055 --> 00:32:13,056 Coincidence. 671 00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:14,641 You're fucking her. 672 00:32:14,724 --> 00:32:15,934 That's coincidence, too. 673 00:32:16,643 --> 00:32:19,646 -I'll figure it out. I'm gonna tell Alex. -No, don't-- 674 00:32:21,064 --> 00:32:22,274 That's not my business. 675 00:32:24,151 --> 00:32:25,777 The Lampoon is my business. 676 00:32:26,403 --> 00:32:27,529 And you're my friend. 677 00:32:28,447 --> 00:32:29,448 So... 678 00:32:30,574 --> 00:32:32,701 if you're gonna take on all this extra stuff, 679 00:32:32,784 --> 00:32:35,162 just remember there's only one of you. 680 00:32:36,663 --> 00:32:41,084 The radio show will be O'Donoghue's thing. I won't be involved. 681 00:32:42,794 --> 00:32:44,129 [Michael O'Donoghue] We have a lot of fun, 682 00:32:44,212 --> 00:32:47,591 but Ed Sullivan is one of our great entertainers... 683 00:32:47,674 --> 00:32:50,677 and I had a thought in the cab on the way to the studio tonight, 684 00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:54,514 and that was this: what if Ed Sullivan were tortured? 685 00:32:54,598 --> 00:32:56,516 And when I say tortured, I mean, 686 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,478 what if steel needles, say six-inches long, 687 00:32:59,561 --> 00:33:02,230 were plunged into his eyeballs? 688 00:33:02,689 --> 00:33:06,067 I think it would go something like this. 689 00:33:07,694 --> 00:33:10,238 [screaming] 690 00:33:11,907 --> 00:33:12,824 Oh, my God! 691 00:33:12,908 --> 00:33:14,451 [screaming] 692 00:33:14,534 --> 00:33:16,495 [laughing] 693 00:33:19,122 --> 00:33:22,918 This National Lampoon Radio Hour contains sexually explicit material 694 00:33:23,001 --> 00:33:26,213 and other adult content that children should not be exposed to. 695 00:33:26,296 --> 00:33:29,132 We probably should have warned you of that at the top of the show. 696 00:33:29,841 --> 00:33:31,927 Okay, so I was involved. 697 00:33:32,010 --> 00:33:34,346 We built our own studio on Madison Avenue 698 00:33:34,429 --> 00:33:37,265 and hired some talented performers who would work for bus fare. 699 00:33:37,349 --> 00:33:39,726 Could I have Flexie the Pocket Monkey? 700 00:33:40,936 --> 00:33:44,314 No, you may not have Flexie the Pocket Monkey. 701 00:33:45,357 --> 00:33:48,902 I'd like a sandwich with mayo and red lettuce on rye, 702 00:33:48,985 --> 00:33:50,529 with a little bacon and egg, 703 00:33:50,612 --> 00:33:53,114 like a dream, with a lot of ketchup and mustard. 704 00:33:54,533 --> 00:33:57,369 Guys, I think Coach is talking about the Big Man. 705 00:33:58,745 --> 00:33:59,704 The league commissioner. 706 00:33:59,788 --> 00:34:02,082 No, what I mean is you've got leukoplakia. 707 00:34:03,458 --> 00:34:06,086 You start off with cute jokes and you end up with atheistic trash, 708 00:34:06,169 --> 00:34:08,964 like this December issue of The National Lampoon! 709 00:34:10,006 --> 00:34:13,301 Yeah, so these actors don't look exactly like the real people. 710 00:34:13,385 --> 00:34:17,264 But come on, do you think I looked like Will Forte when I was 27? 711 00:34:17,347 --> 00:34:19,391 You think Will Forte is 27? 712 00:34:20,016 --> 00:34:22,102 Here's some other things we changed from real life 713 00:34:22,185 --> 00:34:24,062 for pacing, dramatic impact, 714 00:34:24,145 --> 00:34:26,022 or just 'cause we felt like it. 715 00:34:27,482 --> 00:34:29,317 Hey, here, I'm coming in right here. 716 00:34:29,401 --> 00:34:30,694 ♪ I am a woman ♪ 717 00:34:30,777 --> 00:34:33,697 Wait. Wait, uh, Gilda. So do that again. 718 00:34:33,780 --> 00:34:35,407 Start the band up, make them go, 719 00:34:35,490 --> 00:34:37,158 and then all you guys stop her immediately. 720 00:34:37,242 --> 00:34:38,618 Okay. 721 00:34:40,745 --> 00:34:42,330 ♪ I am a woman ♪ 722 00:34:42,414 --> 00:34:44,291 -No! Stop! -It's not right. 723 00:34:44,374 --> 00:34:45,292 ♪ I'm a singer-- ♪ 724 00:34:45,375 --> 00:34:47,586 [Doug] Between the magazine and the radio show, 725 00:34:47,669 --> 00:34:50,046 I barely had time for my other hobbies, 726 00:34:50,130 --> 00:34:51,923 like being a terrible husband. 727 00:34:52,924 --> 00:34:55,093 "Doug Kenney is the handsomest man in comedy"? 728 00:34:55,594 --> 00:34:56,970 Their words, not mine. 729 00:34:57,053 --> 00:34:59,222 Actually, it's a direct quote from you. 730 00:34:59,306 --> 00:35:01,516 Hmm, I'm sure they fact-checked it. 731 00:35:02,225 --> 00:35:04,686 "The staff considers Henry to be the dad of the magazine, 732 00:35:04,769 --> 00:35:08,106 while Doug is like the mom who keeps hitting the cooking sherry." 733 00:35:08,189 --> 00:35:11,401 Oh, Sherry does more than cook, and I would never hit her. 734 00:35:12,902 --> 00:35:14,988 Do you only talk in one-liners? 735 00:35:15,071 --> 00:35:16,865 I also know some dirty limericks. 736 00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:20,994 I thought you were with Mary. 737 00:35:21,077 --> 00:35:22,537 I'm with a lot of people. 738 00:36:07,415 --> 00:36:09,167 -[Alex] Goodbye, Doug. -[door closes] 739 00:36:33,274 --> 00:36:34,734 [typewriter clacking] 740 00:36:34,818 --> 00:36:35,819 [knock on door] 741 00:36:36,361 --> 00:36:37,278 Hey, Doug. 742 00:36:37,362 --> 00:36:38,446 [typewriter clacking] 743 00:36:38,530 --> 00:36:42,659 Uh... I left a sketch to punch up, but... 744 00:36:43,535 --> 00:36:46,121 Don't worry about it. I know you have a lot on your mind right now. 745 00:36:46,204 --> 00:36:48,081 Thank you, but it's okay. It's okay. 746 00:36:52,877 --> 00:36:55,004 -Are you sure? -Yeah, I'm fine. 747 00:36:56,339 --> 00:36:57,716 I mean, with Alex. 748 00:36:58,174 --> 00:37:02,303 If you want to talk about it, I am a licensed chiropractor. 749 00:37:02,721 --> 00:37:04,723 In Honduras. Parts of Honduras. 750 00:37:04,806 --> 00:37:06,349 I appreciate that. Yeah. 751 00:37:06,433 --> 00:37:09,352 -Doug, if you want my advice-- -Hold that thought. 752 00:37:09,436 --> 00:37:10,353 [typewriter clacking] 753 00:37:13,106 --> 00:37:16,317 Done. Here's your sketch. I was stuck on that last line. 754 00:37:17,277 --> 00:37:21,906 You were punching up my sketch while I was attempting to be earnest? 755 00:37:21,990 --> 00:37:26,244 Look, I know I fucked up. I'm fucked up, all right? 756 00:37:26,327 --> 00:37:29,080 But there's just too much work to be done, huh? 757 00:37:29,164 --> 00:37:31,416 I mean, we have a nation to amuse. 758 00:37:31,499 --> 00:37:35,253 We're at war, son, and it's our duty to serve. 759 00:37:35,336 --> 00:37:36,504 Doug, we can't afford any-- 760 00:37:36,588 --> 00:37:40,008 [Doug] Now, let me tell you what it's like to run a successful comedy empire. 761 00:37:40,091 --> 00:37:43,136 The more ads you sell in the magazine, the more pages you print. 762 00:37:43,219 --> 00:37:45,138 Someone has to write those pages. 763 00:37:45,221 --> 00:37:47,640 Then there's the other pieces to edit, art to commission, 764 00:37:47,724 --> 00:37:50,393 headlines, captions and cartoons to fix, 765 00:37:50,477 --> 00:37:51,686 all on a deadline. 766 00:37:51,770 --> 00:37:54,481 On top of that, you expand into books, albums, 767 00:37:54,564 --> 00:37:55,774 then, oh, the radio show 768 00:37:55,857 --> 00:37:58,026 based on your successful magazine is also successful. 769 00:37:58,109 --> 00:38:00,945 And holy shit, an hour is a lot of time to fill. 770 00:38:01,029 --> 00:38:03,531 Couldn't we have called it The National Lampoon Radio Half-Hour? 771 00:38:03,615 --> 00:38:05,200 If we don't cut that gag about Nixon's daughter, 772 00:38:05,283 --> 00:38:06,951 RCA is gonna drop the album! 773 00:38:07,035 --> 00:38:08,912 [Doug] Then you start a live show. 774 00:38:08,995 --> 00:38:10,705 And that's a hit, too. 775 00:38:10,789 --> 00:38:13,583 Yes, I know success is a great thing, that we all want, 776 00:38:13,666 --> 00:38:16,920 but I'm trying to explain why maybe you can't handle it. 777 00:38:17,003 --> 00:38:19,047 To deal with the stress, you smoke dope, 778 00:38:19,130 --> 00:38:20,840 but that makes it harder to meet the deadlines, 779 00:38:20,924 --> 00:38:22,634 and someone else has to pick up the slack. 780 00:38:23,968 --> 00:38:26,137 Doug! How much time did you spend on this coupon? 781 00:38:26,221 --> 00:38:29,432 [Doug] Well, shit, maybe a little LSD for inspiration would help, 782 00:38:29,516 --> 00:38:32,185 but now it's five hours later, and you're still tripping, 783 00:38:32,268 --> 00:38:35,605 and that thing you wrote makes no sense, even to you. 784 00:38:35,688 --> 00:38:38,024 You feel bad about letting your partner down. 785 00:38:38,107 --> 00:38:40,777 Not that one. No, that one. Well, that one, too. 786 00:38:40,860 --> 00:38:43,154 -Doug! -[Mary] Are you even listening to me? 787 00:38:43,238 --> 00:38:45,406 [Doug] You probably shouldn't stay out so late, 788 00:38:45,490 --> 00:38:48,243 but you want to prove that you can run with Chevy and Belushi. 789 00:38:49,160 --> 00:38:52,163 Tony slept with O'Donoghue's girl, and now O'Donoghue won't work with him. 790 00:38:52,247 --> 00:38:55,750 Anne says you're all sexist, which is true, but that's not the point. 791 00:38:55,834 --> 00:38:58,753 And oh, right, the magazine circulation is how high now? 792 00:38:58,837 --> 00:39:01,422 -Doug. Doug. Doug. -You'll just be over here in your office. 793 00:39:04,592 --> 00:39:06,094 -[Mary] Doug? -[knocking on door] 794 00:39:06,177 --> 00:39:08,346 [Henry] Doug? Come on, Doug. 795 00:39:08,429 --> 00:39:09,305 -[Mary] Doug! -[Henry] Doug! 796 00:39:09,889 --> 00:39:10,807 -[Michael] Doug! -[Brian] Doug! 797 00:39:23,778 --> 00:39:26,531 [whirring] 798 00:39:33,997 --> 00:39:34,998 Doug? 799 00:39:36,124 --> 00:39:38,001 Doug, did you break the machine again? 800 00:39:39,961 --> 00:39:40,962 Doug? 801 00:40:01,399 --> 00:40:03,192 [harmonica playing] 802 00:40:03,276 --> 00:40:04,485 [knock on door] 803 00:40:10,867 --> 00:40:11,701 [Lucy] Doug? 804 00:40:11,784 --> 00:40:14,787 [Doug] Peter, Lucy, is this where the college reunion is? 805 00:40:14,871 --> 00:40:16,956 [Peter] Hey, man, good to see you. 806 00:40:19,125 --> 00:40:22,337 "To produce a mighty book, you must choose a mighty theme. 807 00:40:22,921 --> 00:40:26,507 No great and enduring volume can ever be written on the flea, 808 00:40:27,175 --> 00:40:29,636 though many there be who have tried it. 809 00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:32,597 'Ere entering upon the subject of fossil whales. 810 00:40:33,348 --> 00:40:34,849 I present my credentials." 811 00:40:50,782 --> 00:40:52,617 [Mom] All right. Let's go. 812 00:40:53,701 --> 00:40:54,702 Doug. 813 00:40:55,787 --> 00:40:56,746 Come on. 814 00:40:56,829 --> 00:40:58,665 [car doors close] 815 00:40:59,499 --> 00:41:00,541 Doug. 816 00:41:00,625 --> 00:41:02,919 He can stay in the car for all I care. 817 00:41:08,007 --> 00:41:10,051 Thanks for coming. He'll be missed. 818 00:41:11,552 --> 00:41:15,264 My brother. Dad's favorite. Kidney failure. 819 00:41:15,348 --> 00:41:17,892 "The golden boy who died too soon." 820 00:41:18,768 --> 00:41:22,647 See why I didn't want to start the movie with this stuff? It's a total bummer. 821 00:41:23,815 --> 00:41:25,817 You know the nice thing about dying young? 822 00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:28,194 You stay perfectly frozen in time. 823 00:41:28,277 --> 00:41:30,154 You never have to grow up. 824 00:41:30,238 --> 00:41:32,532 [Lucy] "Entering upon the subject of fossil whales, 825 00:41:32,615 --> 00:41:34,784 I present my credentials as a geologist." 826 00:41:34,867 --> 00:41:35,702 Lucy? 827 00:41:37,120 --> 00:41:37,954 Yeah? 828 00:41:38,579 --> 00:41:40,081 I did the right thing, right? 829 00:41:41,374 --> 00:41:42,625 I had to leave. 830 00:41:42,709 --> 00:41:44,460 -I know. -Right? 831 00:41:44,544 --> 00:41:47,130 I just didn't-- I didn't know how to do it anymore. 832 00:41:49,340 --> 00:41:50,967 How do you think they're doing without you? 833 00:41:51,050 --> 00:41:53,845 Oh, they're big boys. They can handle themselves. 834 00:41:53,928 --> 00:41:55,847 Michael, you're being unreasonable. 835 00:41:55,930 --> 00:41:57,974 Somebody really didn't like The Vietnamese Baby Book. 836 00:41:58,057 --> 00:41:59,475 Is it wrong that I'm jealous? 837 00:41:59,559 --> 00:42:02,145 I always knew I'd die from dynamite being sent to an office, 838 00:42:02,228 --> 00:42:03,062 but not like this. 839 00:42:03,146 --> 00:42:06,065 Guys, we have to evacuate. Come on, everybody, move, move, move! 840 00:42:06,149 --> 00:42:07,567 -[Anne] Michael. -[Henry] Come on. 841 00:42:07,650 --> 00:42:11,195 -To think, Tom Jones only gets panties. -Stop smoking. That's not safe. 842 00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:13,781 If you put it down, I'll let you take me to dinner. 843 00:42:14,157 --> 00:42:16,325 -I'm listening. -Hi, is this the city desk? 844 00:42:16,409 --> 00:42:18,953 -I have a story for you. -Don't be a bunch of sissies. 845 00:42:19,037 --> 00:42:22,248 If the nitroglycerin hasn't leaked out, it's harmless. I could eat it. 846 00:42:22,331 --> 00:42:23,416 But it has leaked out. 847 00:42:23,499 --> 00:42:26,794 That's what I'm telling you, is that the nitroglycerin, it's leaked out. 848 00:42:26,878 --> 00:42:28,838 -Shit. -[Henry] All right, come on. Come on. 849 00:42:28,921 --> 00:42:31,340 -[officer] Let's get him out of here -That is my dynamite! 850 00:42:31,758 --> 00:42:32,759 It was addressed to me. 851 00:42:32,842 --> 00:42:35,261 You can't have my dynamite, you fascist goons! 852 00:42:35,344 --> 00:42:37,805 -That's L-a-m-p-o-o-n. -[Michael] That is mine! Mine! 853 00:42:37,889 --> 00:42:39,974 -Oh, he's coming back. -Mine! 854 00:42:40,058 --> 00:42:41,601 It's mine! Mine! Gimme! Gimme! 855 00:42:41,684 --> 00:42:43,019 -Rape! -[officer] Stay back, sir. 856 00:42:43,102 --> 00:42:45,521 I'm warning you that I'm going to rape you. Ow! 857 00:42:47,023 --> 00:42:48,983 I don't want to kick him out, but he's been here for weeks. 858 00:42:49,067 --> 00:42:52,070 He needs us right now. Maybe we should take him to the carousel again. 859 00:42:52,153 --> 00:42:53,404 No. Hey. 860 00:42:55,281 --> 00:42:56,282 What's this? 861 00:42:56,824 --> 00:42:59,744 Oh, this is Teenage Commies From Outer Space. 862 00:42:59,827 --> 00:43:01,829 The great American novel. I finally started writing it. 863 00:43:02,246 --> 00:43:04,415 -That's great, Doug. -[chuckles] Yeah. Thank you. 864 00:43:04,499 --> 00:43:06,751 It's 1956 and aliens attack. 865 00:43:06,834 --> 00:43:09,462 It's like Salinger meets Mark Twain on acid. 866 00:43:09,837 --> 00:43:10,713 -Wow. -Yeah. 867 00:43:10,797 --> 00:43:13,674 They're sharing a drink with Bukowski while going down on Jane Austen. 868 00:43:13,758 --> 00:43:15,551 Just stay with that metaphor for a second. 869 00:43:15,635 --> 00:43:18,638 Oh, no, here comes James Joyce. He's got some baby oil. [laughs] 870 00:43:21,265 --> 00:43:23,935 As you go through it, pay attention to what you're doing 871 00:43:24,018 --> 00:43:26,312 so I don't have to deal with it. That's the whole point. 872 00:43:26,395 --> 00:43:27,480 Where's my stuff? 873 00:43:27,605 --> 00:43:29,941 -I know what a dictionary is. -Henry, where's my stuff? 874 00:43:30,024 --> 00:43:33,027 -I don't know where your stuff is. -Okay, cut the bullshit, I want an answer! 875 00:43:33,111 --> 00:43:35,279 -Whose stuff is on my desk? -I don't know whose stuff-- 876 00:43:35,363 --> 00:43:37,949 We were gone for two days, and you gave her desk away? 877 00:43:38,032 --> 00:43:40,034 [Anne] Doug's gone for months, but you don't touch his desk. 878 00:43:40,118 --> 00:43:41,744 You won't put my stuff in the magazine, 879 00:43:41,828 --> 00:43:43,704 now you really want to send a message, right? 880 00:43:43,788 --> 00:43:46,791 -Clearly, you hate women. -Look, it was probably the cleaners. 881 00:43:46,874 --> 00:43:48,417 -Then fire those bitches, okay? -Henry. 882 00:43:48,501 --> 00:43:51,420 Because here's the option, either they go or we go. 883 00:43:51,504 --> 00:43:55,925 Henry. Henry. This water fountain hasn't been operational in 15 days. 884 00:43:58,344 --> 00:43:59,720 That's what you've been saying "Henry" for? 885 00:43:59,804 --> 00:44:00,638 I'm very thirsty. 886 00:44:00,721 --> 00:44:05,143 Look, you're not quitting. We'll talk to Matty. He'll smooth it over. 887 00:44:05,226 --> 00:44:07,436 I would rather butt-fuck cancer... 888 00:44:07,937 --> 00:44:09,897 -God. -than shake hands with Matty Simmons. 889 00:44:09,981 --> 00:44:12,066 -It's called-- -This is half what you owe me, 890 00:44:12,150 --> 00:44:13,234 you cheap fuck. 891 00:44:13,317 --> 00:44:15,278 Between the ticket sales and the albums-- 892 00:44:15,361 --> 00:44:18,906 It's National Lampoon's Lemmings not Tony Hendra's Lemmings. 893 00:44:18,990 --> 00:44:19,907 What are you doing? 894 00:44:21,868 --> 00:44:23,494 I'd like to report a robbery, please. 895 00:44:23,578 --> 00:44:24,453 Okay, come on. 896 00:44:24,537 --> 00:44:28,583 A man called Matty Simmons, whom I have apprehended at 635 Madison, 897 00:44:28,666 --> 00:44:30,001 has stolen money from me. 898 00:44:30,084 --> 00:44:31,252 And another thing. 899 00:44:31,752 --> 00:44:34,547 If I choose to bring a grenade to work, 900 00:44:34,630 --> 00:44:37,300 that is my right as an Irish-American! 901 00:44:37,842 --> 00:44:38,885 -You people. -What the hell, man? 902 00:44:39,594 --> 00:44:41,846 You people. You're dangerous. 903 00:44:41,929 --> 00:44:43,347 -Let's go. -[man] Are you all right? 904 00:44:43,431 --> 00:44:44,682 [groans] 905 00:44:47,393 --> 00:44:48,769 Holy shit. 906 00:44:52,773 --> 00:44:57,361 I left a half-empty grape Fanta here. Has anyone seen it? 907 00:44:58,446 --> 00:44:59,280 No? 908 00:45:00,781 --> 00:45:02,116 It was about yay big. 909 00:45:09,749 --> 00:45:12,460 Should I be for the Black Panthers or against? 910 00:45:16,756 --> 00:45:19,425 So, uh... what's going on? 911 00:45:20,176 --> 00:45:21,218 What's going on? 912 00:45:22,762 --> 00:45:24,055 Well... 913 00:45:24,138 --> 00:45:25,556 O'Donoghue quit again. 914 00:45:26,223 --> 00:45:28,851 He and Anne are now dating, so she quit, too. 915 00:45:28,935 --> 00:45:32,355 Tony stole a sketch from Monty Python and used it in Lemmings, 916 00:45:32,438 --> 00:45:33,981 which is fantastic. 917 00:45:34,523 --> 00:45:38,027 And Matty is claiming he can't afford to buy us out next year, 918 00:45:38,110 --> 00:45:40,529 in flagrant violation of our contract. 919 00:45:41,530 --> 00:45:43,324 Oh. Gosh. 920 00:45:43,991 --> 00:45:47,328 But, you know, I meant, what's going on with you? 921 00:45:47,745 --> 00:45:49,580 That is what's going on with me. 922 00:45:50,831 --> 00:45:52,583 This is what you left me with. 923 00:45:54,335 --> 00:45:57,171 Well, it wasn't a completely wasted breakdown. 924 00:45:57,755 --> 00:45:58,881 I finished the novel. 925 00:46:11,936 --> 00:46:14,605 -You want me to read this now? -Would you? 926 00:46:19,527 --> 00:46:21,028 Teenage Commies From Outer Space. 927 00:46:40,673 --> 00:46:41,674 It's... 928 00:46:45,344 --> 00:46:46,887 -It sucks. -[Henry] Yeah. 929 00:46:49,432 --> 00:46:51,183 It's done. It's not worth talking about. 930 00:46:54,145 --> 00:46:55,980 It's good to have you back, Doug. 931 00:46:58,774 --> 00:47:00,818 And then February can be the Strange Sex issue. 932 00:47:00,901 --> 00:47:05,489 Yes. The Strange Sex-- And we should do an issue within the issue, 933 00:47:05,573 --> 00:47:06,782 The National Lampoof. 934 00:47:06,866 --> 00:47:07,742 [chuckling] 935 00:47:07,825 --> 00:47:10,911 Instead of Our Bodies, Ourselves, Our Bodies, None of Your Business. 936 00:47:10,995 --> 00:47:12,580 [Tony] None of your business. 937 00:47:12,663 --> 00:47:14,415 A magazine, Playdead. 938 00:47:14,498 --> 00:47:18,919 Erotic photos of women's corpses 939 00:47:19,003 --> 00:47:21,672 hanging from nooses, head in the oven, 940 00:47:21,756 --> 00:47:24,341 -maybe one of them fell down the stairs. -[Tony] Jesus Christ. 941 00:47:24,425 --> 00:47:27,470 I was thinking we could write up Nixon's resume, 942 00:47:27,553 --> 00:47:29,764 you know, now that he's back on the job market? 943 00:47:31,057 --> 00:47:33,893 Yes, like the piece PJ has in the current issue, 944 00:47:33,976 --> 00:47:36,645 which is available on newsstands, if you want to buy a copy, 945 00:47:36,729 --> 00:47:38,981 -you could use it as research. -Okay, Tony. Yeah. 946 00:47:39,065 --> 00:47:41,275 We had something like that in the last issue. It's not important. 947 00:47:41,358 --> 00:47:44,945 -I think "play dead" is the way to go. -We'll let Brian get all the dead bodies. 948 00:47:45,029 --> 00:47:47,782 -A braille version of The Joy of Sex. -Oh, my gosh. 949 00:47:47,865 --> 00:47:50,284 Hey, where's my tennis racket? 950 00:47:51,368 --> 00:47:54,205 I used to keep my tennis racket behind the filing cabinet. 951 00:47:54,288 --> 00:47:55,122 [Henry] Hey, Doug. 952 00:47:55,623 --> 00:47:57,124 Doug. One second. 953 00:47:57,708 --> 00:47:58,918 [Tony] Glory hole page 954 00:47:59,001 --> 00:48:02,797 and have an illustration of a lavatory cubicle on the back. 955 00:48:02,880 --> 00:48:04,715 -[Brian] A lavatory cubicle. -[Tony] And... 956 00:48:05,508 --> 00:48:07,009 Is this about the tennis racket? 957 00:48:07,093 --> 00:48:08,761 [chuckles] Uh, no. 958 00:48:08,844 --> 00:48:13,224 Um... listen, I was thinking maybe you could do another special project. 959 00:48:13,307 --> 00:48:14,141 -You know? -Yeah? 960 00:48:14,225 --> 00:48:16,102 Away from normal deadlines. 961 00:48:16,185 --> 00:48:17,686 You'll get out of the office. 962 00:48:17,770 --> 00:48:20,564 You could do it with PJ. What do you think? 963 00:48:21,607 --> 00:48:23,067 -Sound good? -Do you need smokes? 964 00:48:23,150 --> 00:48:24,443 -Yeah. -He's gonna go get smokes. 965 00:48:25,694 --> 00:48:27,780 What about a map to glory holes in your neighborhood? 966 00:48:27,863 --> 00:48:29,406 -It just says, "Your house." -[Henry] What'd I miss? 967 00:48:29,490 --> 00:48:30,825 These people don't need encouragement. 968 00:48:31,492 --> 00:48:33,828 A cartoon, "Jewish Moon Landing." 969 00:48:33,911 --> 00:48:34,954 [chuckling] 970 00:48:35,037 --> 00:48:36,705 [Brian] Sort of a differently-shaped helmet. 971 00:48:36,789 --> 00:48:39,708 [Doug] I'm not sure if Henry was trying to save me from embarrassment 972 00:48:39,792 --> 00:48:43,254 or if he truly believed I could still create the great American-- 973 00:48:43,337 --> 00:48:44,755 I don't know, something. 974 00:48:45,339 --> 00:48:47,424 But either way, we found it. 975 00:48:47,508 --> 00:48:50,761 An idea full of paranoia and nostalgia, 976 00:48:50,845 --> 00:48:53,848 the meaningless cruelty of being young in America. 977 00:48:54,515 --> 00:48:56,475 The high school yearbook. 978 00:48:56,642 --> 00:48:58,144 They're all the same. 979 00:48:58,227 --> 00:49:01,105 It's like every single shop teacher went to the same barber. 980 00:49:01,188 --> 00:49:02,857 It's authoritarian government, man. 981 00:49:02,940 --> 00:49:04,900 It's like we're living in an oppressed nation. 982 00:49:04,984 --> 00:49:06,152 Yes, it is. 983 00:49:06,235 --> 00:49:08,445 [PJ] Salute to the seniors. Yes, this is exactly-- 984 00:49:08,529 --> 00:49:10,072 They make you salute these people. 985 00:49:10,156 --> 00:49:12,700 They all have thousand-yard stares, you know what I mean? 986 00:49:18,539 --> 00:49:21,792 You wonder why Nixon's the way he is, it's because he went to high school, man. 987 00:49:22,793 --> 00:49:26,213 Chess club, glee club, future homemakers. 988 00:49:26,297 --> 00:49:29,967 Everything screwed up about our culture, it all begins right here. 989 00:49:30,050 --> 00:49:31,135 All these forced smiles. 990 00:49:31,218 --> 00:49:32,970 You know, whether we know it or not, 991 00:49:33,053 --> 00:49:36,182 every high school sorts us into the same exact types. 992 00:49:36,265 --> 00:49:38,309 It's Nazi social engineering. 993 00:49:38,392 --> 00:49:39,393 Bully, 994 00:49:39,476 --> 00:49:40,477 introvert, 995 00:49:40,561 --> 00:49:41,770 teacher's pet, 995 00:47:40,561 --> 00:49:41,770 .:: HDMovie8.Com ::. Watch Movies and Series Free! 996 00:49:41,854 --> 00:49:42,813 delinquent, 997 00:49:42,897 --> 00:49:44,023 foreign exchange student, 998 00:49:44,106 --> 00:49:45,357 virgin, 999 00:49:45,441 --> 00:49:47,651 perfect perky princess, 1000 00:49:47,735 --> 00:49:49,278 Spazzy McSpaz, 1001 00:49:49,361 --> 00:49:51,155 wacky class clown. 1002 00:49:53,991 --> 00:49:55,326 [Doug] There's a type for everyone. 1003 00:49:55,409 --> 00:49:57,036 Whether you're the rich dick, 1004 00:49:57,119 --> 00:49:58,412 future homosexual, 1005 00:49:58,495 --> 00:50:00,080 beatnik, tramp, 1006 00:50:00,164 --> 00:50:01,373 overlooked black kid, 1007 00:50:01,457 --> 00:50:02,583 the dictator, 1008 00:50:02,666 --> 00:50:03,667 the nobody, 1009 00:50:03,751 --> 00:50:05,836 and, of course, the kid who died. 1010 00:50:06,545 --> 00:50:09,965 This was the best Senior Year ever, except for the tragic deaths 1011 00:50:10,049 --> 00:50:12,968 of Howard Havermeyer and President Kennedy, 1012 00:50:13,052 --> 00:50:14,595 and the car accident after prom. 1013 00:50:15,179 --> 00:50:16,347 All right, ready, girls? 1014 00:50:16,972 --> 00:50:19,683 Three, two, one. 1015 00:50:23,729 --> 00:50:26,523 [Tony] "The Lampoon's hit parody of the high school yearbook, 1016 00:50:26,607 --> 00:50:29,693 now on track to sell over one million copies, 1017 00:50:29,777 --> 00:50:34,323 is the greatest example of group writing since the King James Bible." 1018 00:50:34,406 --> 00:50:36,867 -And you didn't write a word of it. -I'm in the group. 1019 00:50:36,951 --> 00:50:40,162 We all work together. I mean, I gave everyone credit for "Lemmings." 1020 00:50:40,246 --> 00:50:42,456 -[man] I must have missed that. -[Doug] Matty. 1021 00:50:42,539 --> 00:50:44,124 Those two look armed for battle. 1022 00:50:44,208 --> 00:50:46,794 Well, it's been five years. Matty has to buy them out. 1023 00:50:47,461 --> 00:50:49,797 Time to feast on the fatted calf. 1024 00:50:53,342 --> 00:50:55,177 Matty, we need to talk about this now. 1025 00:50:55,261 --> 00:50:57,805 Look, I know why you're here. I know what day it is. 1026 00:50:58,639 --> 00:50:59,723 Let me explain this. 1027 00:50:59,807 --> 00:51:01,976 You boys are victims of your own success. 1028 00:51:02,059 --> 00:51:04,603 I don't have the cash to pay you ten times earnings. 1029 00:51:04,979 --> 00:51:07,731 We got too much earnings. I can't cover it. 1030 00:51:07,815 --> 00:51:10,943 My apologies for making the yearbook such a hit. I'll aim lower next time. 1031 00:51:11,026 --> 00:51:12,278 You signed a contract. 1032 00:51:12,361 --> 00:51:15,322 He didn't fulfill his contract, did he? He disappeared on us. 1033 00:51:15,406 --> 00:51:18,117 I still put out the fucking magazine. Every month. 1034 00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:20,119 We just want to be paid what we deserve. 1035 00:51:20,202 --> 00:51:22,705 I know. Here's what I can do now. Okay? 1036 00:51:22,788 --> 00:51:24,790 More stock. A lot more stock, 1037 00:51:24,873 --> 00:51:28,043 and I pay the entire sum off in ten years. Okay? 1038 00:51:28,127 --> 00:51:31,088 I mean, doesn't that sound better than fucking Matty over a barrel? 1039 00:51:34,049 --> 00:51:35,092 I knew it. 1040 00:51:35,175 --> 00:51:36,844 [Doug] I had to get Henry what he deserved. 1041 00:51:36,927 --> 00:51:38,887 And the only way to change Matty's mind 1042 00:51:38,971 --> 00:51:42,933 was a well thought out argument, delivered clearly and calmly. 1043 00:51:44,226 --> 00:51:45,811 No, no, no, no, no! 1044 00:51:45,894 --> 00:51:46,854 We want our money! 1045 00:51:46,937 --> 00:51:49,732 I fucked up, fine. But Henry kept it going. 1046 00:51:49,815 --> 00:51:51,317 And we want our money! Now! 1047 00:51:51,817 --> 00:51:52,651 Henry. 1048 00:51:55,070 --> 00:51:56,488 Come on. Let's go! Do it! 1049 00:51:58,907 --> 00:52:00,451 -[Matty] Hey! -[Doug] We want our money! 1050 00:52:00,534 --> 00:52:01,994 I think it's going well. 1051 00:52:02,077 --> 00:52:03,620 I'm going for the checks. 1052 00:52:06,373 --> 00:52:07,708 You two are pirates. 1053 00:52:08,417 --> 00:52:09,460 [Doug] Here's a pen. 1054 00:52:13,589 --> 00:52:14,757 [Matty] You assholes. 1055 00:52:15,257 --> 00:52:16,884 Do you know what you've done? 1056 00:52:16,967 --> 00:52:17,885 You've ruined me. 1057 00:52:17,968 --> 00:52:20,137 You've ruined this company. You know that. 1058 00:52:21,221 --> 00:52:22,639 We made this company. 1059 00:52:28,020 --> 00:52:29,646 We should celebrate, huh? 1060 00:52:30,439 --> 00:52:32,608 Come on, let's go buy you a new pipe. 1061 00:52:33,692 --> 00:52:34,902 Henry? 1062 00:52:35,402 --> 00:52:36,779 Tempting? 1063 00:52:36,862 --> 00:52:38,906 They're all expecting a slice of the pie. 1064 00:52:42,159 --> 00:52:43,869 It could get rather awkward. 1065 00:52:43,952 --> 00:52:46,121 I don't get it. What's the bit? 1066 00:52:48,916 --> 00:52:50,167 You might need those. 1067 00:52:51,418 --> 00:52:53,003 I'm digging the commitment. 1068 00:52:55,381 --> 00:52:57,591 You said if it ever stopped being fun... 1069 00:52:58,884 --> 00:52:59,718 So... 1070 00:52:59,802 --> 00:53:00,677 [scoffs] 1071 00:53:00,761 --> 00:53:03,055 We just got the money. I just got us the money. 1072 00:53:03,138 --> 00:53:05,432 No, you got Matty to write us a check, Doug. 1073 00:53:05,933 --> 00:53:07,101 I earned that money. 1074 00:53:08,644 --> 00:53:11,271 -I'm done. -Okay, look, we can hire more editors. 1075 00:53:11,355 --> 00:53:13,273 -We'll focus on the writing. -I don't want to go back. 1076 00:53:13,357 --> 00:53:15,776 -Just you and me, like it used to be. -I want to move on. 1077 00:53:15,859 --> 00:53:19,238 Wait. What's that supposed to mean? You want to move on from us? 1078 00:53:19,321 --> 00:53:21,156 It means I'm tired of taking care of you. 1079 00:53:24,535 --> 00:53:26,578 What are you gonna do all day, huh? 1080 00:53:28,330 --> 00:53:29,164 Come on. 1081 00:53:30,833 --> 00:53:32,042 You can't leave. 1082 00:53:33,293 --> 00:53:34,294 You did. 1083 00:53:39,883 --> 00:53:40,884 You'll be fine. 1084 00:53:42,428 --> 00:53:44,388 Don't forget to feed and water them. 1085 00:53:45,431 --> 00:53:46,265 Henry. 1086 00:53:48,183 --> 00:53:51,019 Good luck. Fuck you. Goodbye. 1087 00:54:00,154 --> 00:54:01,238 [door closes] 1088 00:54:03,407 --> 00:54:04,700 Who gets his office? 1089 00:54:05,617 --> 00:54:08,787 -[chattering] -[typewriters clacking] 1090 00:54:10,622 --> 00:54:13,917 PJ, this Esquire parody's a mess. 1091 00:54:14,001 --> 00:54:16,587 [PJ] I gotta run into a meeting. Can you do a quick rewrite? 1092 00:54:24,470 --> 00:54:25,846 [man] Does this sound familiar? 1093 00:54:25,929 --> 00:54:27,723 [coughs] I feel terrible. 1094 00:54:27,806 --> 00:54:31,101 [woman] Oh, honey. Just a few days ago you were feeling swell. 1095 00:54:31,185 --> 00:54:33,061 [man] Gee, Dad, kind of like what happened to Doug Kenney. 1096 00:54:33,145 --> 00:54:36,231 Exactly, son. I feel just like that piece of garbage Doug Kenney. 1097 00:54:36,315 --> 00:54:40,194 Feeling like Doug Kenney, a chronic condition with no known cure. 1098 00:54:40,277 --> 00:54:43,489 Symptoms include loneliness, uselessness 1099 00:54:43,572 --> 00:54:45,324 and a crushing sense of regret. 1100 00:54:45,407 --> 00:54:48,035 [woman] I heard Matty Simmons, you know, the publisher? 1101 00:54:48,118 --> 00:54:49,620 [man] Sure, I know Matty. Great guy. 1102 00:54:49,703 --> 00:54:52,748 [woman] Well, he put PJ O'Rourke in charge of the magazine 1103 00:54:52,831 --> 00:54:55,667 because Doug couldn't handle something like that. 1104 00:54:55,751 --> 00:54:59,338 [man] It could happen to you or someone in your church or Masonic Lodge. 1105 00:54:59,421 --> 00:55:00,923 Feeling like Doug Kenney. 1106 00:55:01,006 --> 00:55:06,595 Seek treatment before you become permanently, irreversibly unlovable. 1107 00:55:10,015 --> 00:55:13,435 ♪ Don't give up what's in you ♪ 1108 00:55:14,353 --> 00:55:15,562 [woman laughs] 1109 00:55:15,646 --> 00:55:17,272 -[woman] It's hereditary! -[woman 2] I'm telling you. 1110 00:55:17,356 --> 00:55:20,901 -Have you ever heard of anybody like this? -No. [laughs] 1111 00:55:20,984 --> 00:55:22,194 [woman 2] I'll see you outside. 1112 00:55:22,277 --> 00:55:23,612 [woman] Right behind you. 1113 00:55:24,363 --> 00:55:28,325 Excuse me. Did you play Abigail Adams on PBS? 1114 00:55:28,408 --> 00:55:31,411 Oh, I didn't play Abigail Adams. 1115 00:55:32,162 --> 00:55:34,289 I became Abigail Adams. 1116 00:55:35,040 --> 00:55:36,833 I didn't think there were any PBS viewers here. 1117 00:55:36,917 --> 00:55:40,295 Oh, no, I don't watch. Somebody had just described it in great detail. 1118 00:55:40,379 --> 00:55:43,382 You seem like generally what they were describing. 1119 00:55:43,465 --> 00:55:46,426 -Mm-hmm. -Like an Abigail Adams type. 1120 00:55:46,510 --> 00:55:48,971 Kathryn. I'm the woman you're hitting on. 1121 00:55:49,054 --> 00:55:52,683 Doug Kenney, Chagrin Falls, Ohio. I'm the woman who's hitting on you. 1122 00:55:53,267 --> 00:55:55,727 What do you say we get out of here? Get something to eat, huh? 1123 00:55:55,811 --> 00:55:57,354 At three a.m.? 1124 00:55:57,437 --> 00:56:00,023 Yeah, you're right. We should probably just eat here, huh? 1125 00:56:02,234 --> 00:56:03,443 Oh, fuck. 1126 00:56:03,527 --> 00:56:05,904 What's wrong? Do I have glass in my teeth? 1127 00:56:05,988 --> 00:56:06,989 [laughs] 1128 00:56:07,072 --> 00:56:08,699 I kind of conquered the publishing thing. 1129 00:56:08,782 --> 00:56:11,952 I'm probably gonna release an album of Gregorian chants next. 1130 00:56:12,536 --> 00:56:14,079 I'm gonna make an epic movie, 1131 00:56:14,162 --> 00:56:17,165 kind of Gone With The Wind meets Citizen Kane, but better. 1132 00:56:17,708 --> 00:56:19,167 -And longer. -You're going Hollywood. 1133 00:56:19,251 --> 00:56:21,461 Oh, I'm so Hollywood, you don't even know. 1134 00:56:21,545 --> 00:56:24,131 I'm gonna change my name to Charlton Hepburn. 1135 00:56:27,884 --> 00:56:31,972 ♪ Beautiful dreamer ♪ 1136 00:56:32,055 --> 00:56:35,642 ♪ Wake unto me ♪ 1137 00:56:36,393 --> 00:56:39,938 ♪ Starlight and dew ♪ 1138 00:56:40,564 --> 00:56:42,733 ♪ Waiting for thee ♪ 1139 00:56:44,067 --> 00:56:47,529 ♪ Sounds of the hmm, hmm ♪ 1140 00:56:47,613 --> 00:56:51,408 ♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo ♪ 1141 00:56:51,491 --> 00:56:55,579 ♪ Huh, da, doo, hoo ♪ 1142 00:56:55,662 --> 00:56:57,706 ♪ Have all passed away ♪ 1143 00:56:59,082 --> 00:57:00,250 I remembered something. 1144 00:57:12,262 --> 00:57:14,306 I don't usually kiss on the first date. 1145 00:57:14,389 --> 00:57:16,266 Well, I don't consider this a date. 1146 00:57:16,350 --> 00:57:18,435 Then let's go back to my place and screw. 1147 00:57:22,147 --> 00:57:25,108 [Doug] So Kathryn came into my life just when I needed her, 1148 00:57:25,192 --> 00:57:28,403 but nobody can just swoop in and fix you right away. 1149 00:57:28,487 --> 00:57:30,989 I was still struggling with the same anxieties, 1150 00:57:31,073 --> 00:57:33,700 but now with millions of dollars that frankly... 1151 00:57:34,117 --> 00:57:37,371 [yelling] frankly I had no idea what I was going to do with them. 1152 00:57:37,454 --> 00:57:38,580 [rock music blaring] 1153 00:57:44,836 --> 00:57:45,963 ♪ Hey ♪ 1154 00:57:49,174 --> 00:57:50,384 You bought your parents this? 1155 00:57:51,009 --> 00:57:52,678 Way to establish dominance. 1156 00:57:52,761 --> 00:57:54,137 Surprise! 1157 00:57:54,221 --> 00:57:57,265 What are you doing here? Is that a Porsche? 1158 00:57:57,349 --> 00:57:59,518 Gorgeous. Just gorgeous. 1159 00:57:59,601 --> 00:58:02,270 You know, she was the first member of her tribe to wear shoes. 1160 00:58:02,354 --> 00:58:03,689 What is that? 1161 00:58:03,772 --> 00:58:06,817 Well, Dad complained about the lawn. Told me it was too much to mow. 1162 00:58:06,900 --> 00:58:08,235 So... 1163 00:58:08,318 --> 00:58:10,237 Get out of here, lawnmowers. 1164 00:58:10,320 --> 00:58:13,115 -Here we go. Come on. That's it. -Really fun, Doug. 1165 00:58:13,198 --> 00:58:15,617 Now the mower will be shitting on my lawn. 1166 00:58:15,701 --> 00:58:19,371 Yeah. It's called fertilizer, Dad. They threw that in for free. 1167 00:58:19,454 --> 00:58:20,622 -[Doug] You stay here. -[goat bleats] 1168 00:58:20,706 --> 00:58:24,251 So, you work with Doug, doing the comedy? 1169 00:58:24,334 --> 00:58:27,295 Oh... it never feels like work with Doug. 1170 00:58:28,255 --> 00:58:30,632 But now I'm about to star in a new TV show. 1171 00:58:30,716 --> 00:58:32,509 How wonderful. 1172 00:58:32,592 --> 00:58:34,261 We'll have to watch, won't we? 1173 00:58:34,344 --> 00:58:35,345 Mm-hmm. 1174 00:58:36,596 --> 00:58:40,767 You must be so proud of him. All his success at such a young age... 1175 00:58:41,226 --> 00:58:42,769 all the while being color-blind. 1176 00:58:44,479 --> 00:58:45,981 You call this success? 1177 00:58:47,149 --> 00:58:49,526 Publishing a dirty magazine? Making fun of the president? 1178 00:58:49,609 --> 00:58:52,070 -[Mom] Okay, Harry. -What is there to be proud of? 1179 00:59:01,455 --> 00:59:03,040 I'm gonna get a gimlet. 1180 00:59:07,002 --> 00:59:08,170 -Oh, dear. -Sorry. Got it. 1181 00:59:10,255 --> 00:59:11,548 I'm fine. Let me just-- 1182 00:59:12,758 --> 00:59:13,842 Oh, I got it. 1183 00:59:17,512 --> 00:59:20,015 Okay. I see what I did. I see what I did. 1184 00:59:20,474 --> 00:59:21,558 Good evening. 1185 00:59:21,641 --> 00:59:22,601 Good evening. 1186 00:59:25,645 --> 00:59:27,022 Good evening. 1187 00:59:27,105 --> 00:59:29,649 They put O'Donoghue on live TV? 1188 00:59:30,192 --> 00:59:32,486 O'Donoghue, Belushi. 1189 00:59:32,569 --> 00:59:35,113 They got Gilda, Anne, Chevy. 1190 00:59:35,197 --> 00:59:37,824 Those fuckers probably hired our accountants, too. 1191 00:59:37,908 --> 00:59:39,618 -I would like... -I would like... 1192 00:59:40,285 --> 00:59:42,996 -...to feed your fingertips... -...to feed your fingertips... 1193 00:59:43,080 --> 00:59:45,165 -...to the wolverines. -...to the Wolverines. 1194 00:59:45,248 --> 00:59:46,541 -[Kathryn laughs] -[Michael] Next. 1195 00:59:47,209 --> 00:59:48,126 I'm afraid... 1196 00:59:48,210 --> 00:59:49,878 Come on, that's funny. 1197 00:59:50,921 --> 00:59:54,091 You know, NBC asked Matty to do a Lampoon TV show. 1198 00:59:54,591 --> 00:59:57,511 Really? That's great! Are you gonna work on it? 1199 00:59:57,594 --> 01:00:01,181 They asked him eight months ago. He said that we were too busy. 1200 01:00:02,891 --> 01:00:05,602 Babe, who cares? This is on in the middle of the night. 1201 01:00:05,685 --> 01:00:07,187 I care! All right? 1202 01:00:07,270 --> 01:00:09,648 This should've been ours. It basically is ours. 1203 01:00:10,190 --> 01:00:11,858 You could just be flattered, 1204 01:00:12,359 --> 01:00:14,402 because it shows how influential you are. 1205 01:00:16,029 --> 01:00:17,322 [gasps] 1206 01:00:20,784 --> 01:00:22,536 [Kathryn] You gonna be okay about this? 1207 01:00:22,619 --> 01:00:23,578 Well... 1208 01:00:24,162 --> 01:00:26,206 tell me again how influential I am. 1209 01:00:26,957 --> 01:00:31,795 You are the most influentialest. 1210 01:00:36,424 --> 01:00:39,886 Live from New York, it's Saturday Night! 1211 01:00:39,970 --> 01:00:42,013 [cheering and applause] 1212 01:00:45,392 --> 01:00:48,812 [Doug] Turns out Saturday Night Live was canceled after only three weeks. 1213 01:00:48,895 --> 01:00:51,815 Oh, I'm sorry, I meant to say it was an instant sensation 1214 01:00:51,898 --> 01:00:54,109 that is still going four decades later. 1215 01:00:54,192 --> 01:00:55,235 Hi, Doug. 1216 01:00:55,318 --> 01:00:58,113 So I went to one of their parties to congratulate my friends 1217 01:00:58,196 --> 01:01:00,532 on the success they were having... without me. 1218 01:01:00,615 --> 01:01:02,284 [Anne] Oh, Doug! Hey! 1219 01:01:02,868 --> 01:01:03,702 -Hey. -Hi. 1220 01:01:04,161 --> 01:01:05,704 -How you doing? -Hey. 1221 01:01:05,787 --> 01:01:06,997 Look what the cat dragged in. 1222 01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:10,167 Hey, I've been enjoying your little show, along with the rest of the country. 1223 01:01:10,250 --> 01:01:13,336 Yeah. Yeah, it's fun. It's like The Lampoon used to be. 1224 01:01:14,629 --> 01:01:17,007 Is. Like, don't listen to me. 1225 01:01:17,090 --> 01:01:19,259 Television, the napalm of culture. 1226 01:01:19,718 --> 01:01:22,387 Burns you down to nothing, but the glow is awful pretty. 1227 01:01:22,470 --> 01:01:23,722 Okay, so he's just upset 1228 01:01:23,805 --> 01:01:26,516 because Lorne wants us to write sketches for the Muppets. 1229 01:01:26,600 --> 01:01:28,143 I don't write for felt. 1230 01:01:28,727 --> 01:01:30,770 Oh, not you too, Brian. 1231 01:01:30,854 --> 01:01:32,772 They offered me 30 pieces of silver. 1232 01:01:33,356 --> 01:01:34,858 You know how I feel about silver. 1233 01:01:34,941 --> 01:01:37,194 [Doug] They were like ships leaving a sinking rat. 1234 01:01:37,277 --> 01:01:38,445 Doug. 1235 01:01:38,528 --> 01:01:39,821 Oh, jeez. 1236 01:01:40,363 --> 01:01:43,116 And yeah, Chevy did this every time I saw him. 1237 01:01:43,200 --> 01:01:44,784 Right. There we are. 1238 01:01:46,036 --> 01:01:47,287 -Hi, Doug. -Hey, lover. 1239 01:01:47,996 --> 01:01:49,164 You should meet Lorne. 1240 01:01:49,539 --> 01:01:50,916 Oh, the comedy boy-wonder, huh? 1241 01:01:50,999 --> 01:01:54,753 No. Hey, there can be two boy-wonders. Boys-wonder. 1242 01:01:55,670 --> 01:01:57,005 What do boys wonder? Excuse you. 1243 01:01:57,088 --> 01:02:00,050 Lorne, this is Doug Kenney from The National Lampoon. 1244 01:02:00,133 --> 01:02:01,760 Hi, Doug. Pleasure to meet you. 1245 01:02:01,843 --> 01:02:04,679 Thanks. I like the show. It's great stuff. 1246 01:02:04,763 --> 01:02:06,890 Right. Well, you know, we do what we can. 1247 01:02:07,390 --> 01:02:10,977 Doug, uh, you get the kind of comedy we're doing here. 1248 01:02:11,061 --> 01:02:13,730 You and I, you know, we share a sensibility. 1249 01:02:13,813 --> 01:02:15,941 Yeah, and a cast and writers. Yeah. 1250 01:02:16,024 --> 01:02:18,902 Spotting talent is the most important job I have. 1251 01:02:18,985 --> 01:02:20,987 -You can understand that. -Yeah. 1252 01:02:21,071 --> 01:02:23,990 I was wondering, would you be interested in joining us? 1253 01:02:24,074 --> 01:02:26,201 [scoffs] You want me to write for you? 1254 01:02:26,868 --> 01:02:29,537 That sounds great! Yeah, I'd get to be your employee? 1255 01:02:29,621 --> 01:02:31,665 Well, that's a fairly narrow way to put that, Doug. 1256 01:02:31,748 --> 01:02:34,209 -You think I've flamed out. -That's not what I'm saying at all. 1257 01:02:34,292 --> 01:02:35,293 It sounds like it is. 1258 01:02:35,377 --> 01:02:39,172 What I'm saying is I think you could make this show even better than it is. 1259 01:02:40,340 --> 01:02:42,092 Okay, well, I don't need a handout. 1260 01:02:43,551 --> 01:02:46,596 Oh, here. You're probably gonna steal it from me anyway. 1261 01:02:49,182 --> 01:02:51,309 Game show sketch, Name Those Bats. 1262 01:02:51,393 --> 01:02:53,520 Contestants are in a barn, bats flying at them, 1263 01:02:53,603 --> 01:02:55,146 they have to name the bats. 1264 01:02:55,230 --> 01:02:58,149 [Doug] I wasn't gonna let some TV show steal my thunder. 1265 01:02:58,233 --> 01:03:00,026 I had to set my sights higher. 1266 01:03:00,110 --> 01:03:02,028 So Harold and I came up with the perfect idea 1267 01:03:02,112 --> 01:03:04,906 for the first National Lampoon movie. 1268 01:03:04,990 --> 01:03:07,117 Laser Orgy Girls. 1269 01:03:07,909 --> 01:03:08,743 [Doug] Huh? 1270 01:03:08,827 --> 01:03:11,538 It's about Charles Manson in the tenth grade, huh? 1271 01:03:11,621 --> 01:03:14,124 The man's visited by aliens or a UFO, whatever you want-- 1272 01:03:14,207 --> 01:03:15,875 Guys, Manson in high school? 1273 01:03:15,959 --> 01:03:16,876 You're right. 1274 01:03:17,711 --> 01:03:19,546 We'll put him in college. That's funnier. 1275 01:03:19,629 --> 01:03:21,464 No, forget Manson. It's a bad idea. 1276 01:03:21,548 --> 01:03:23,216 So what are you saying, Matty? 1277 01:03:23,300 --> 01:03:24,926 You don't want a movie about Charles Manson? 1278 01:03:25,010 --> 01:03:26,261 We got one shot for a movie. 1279 01:03:26,344 --> 01:03:29,264 Manson in high school is a parody ad for the magazine. 1280 01:03:29,347 --> 01:03:31,182 -If it's a rights issue-- -We need a big idea. 1281 01:03:31,266 --> 01:03:33,059 -My uncle's a lawyer. -A big movie idea. 1282 01:03:33,143 --> 01:03:34,936 We could find a way to get Manson involved. 1283 01:03:35,020 --> 01:03:37,439 Harold. I think Matty might actually have a point here. 1284 01:03:40,233 --> 01:03:42,944 -What's the bit we're doing? -No, this isn't a bit. 1285 01:03:43,028 --> 01:03:45,280 Look, what's the most popular thing in the magazine? 1286 01:03:45,363 --> 01:03:46,489 -The tits. -Yes, the tits. 1287 01:03:46,573 --> 01:03:50,035 But also, like, you know, Night of the Seven Fires. 1288 01:03:50,577 --> 01:03:52,245 Pinto's First Lay. All the Chris Miller stuff. 1289 01:03:52,329 --> 01:03:53,747 -The fraternity stories. -Yeah. 1290 01:03:53,830 --> 01:03:58,251 We have a chance to make the great American college movie here, plus tits. 1291 01:03:59,669 --> 01:04:01,087 Matty, get Chris Miller on the line. 1292 01:04:01,546 --> 01:04:03,298 One second. I like this. 1293 01:04:05,175 --> 01:04:07,469 God damn it. I'm not your secretary! 1294 01:04:08,803 --> 01:04:10,180 [Doug] Together with Chris Miller, 1295 01:04:10,263 --> 01:04:12,515 we wrote down every funny college story, 1296 01:04:12,599 --> 01:04:14,601 every crazy character we could think of. 1297 01:04:15,894 --> 01:04:17,520 Then we hooked up with Ivan Reitman, 1298 01:04:17,604 --> 01:04:20,690 a Canadian filmmaker who'd produced a stage show for us. 1299 01:04:20,774 --> 01:04:24,235 Delta was by far the craziest frat at Dartmouth. 1300 01:04:24,319 --> 01:04:26,196 They use to call us the "Animal House." 1301 01:04:26,279 --> 01:04:27,572 That's a good title! 1302 01:04:27,655 --> 01:04:28,782 Yeah! 1303 01:04:29,199 --> 01:04:30,700 The craziest frat. 1304 01:04:31,409 --> 01:04:33,536 [secretary] Brad Zotti from Universal is on. 1305 01:04:33,620 --> 01:04:34,954 -Brad. -Yeah. 1306 01:04:35,038 --> 01:04:36,790 I got you on speakerphone here with Ivan. 1307 01:04:36,873 --> 01:04:38,124 -Look, guys. -Hey, Brad. 1308 01:04:38,208 --> 01:04:41,378 Movie treatments are 20 pages long. This is 114. 1309 01:04:41,461 --> 01:04:42,962 Well, this is their first movie, Brad. 1310 01:04:43,046 --> 01:04:45,632 -I would never make this. -I'm surprised to hear you say that. 1311 01:04:45,715 --> 01:04:48,051 I mean, you know the Lampoon brand is hot right now. 1312 01:04:48,134 --> 01:04:50,637 A very strong demographic with the young people. 1313 01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:54,140 Okay, look, I couldn't do this unless it was, like, for under $2 million. 1314 01:04:54,224 --> 01:04:55,975 -We can do that. -Really? 1315 01:04:56,643 --> 01:04:57,936 I guarantee it. 1316 01:04:58,019 --> 01:04:59,187 -Okay. -We got a deal. 1317 01:04:59,270 --> 01:05:00,480 -Great. Bye. -Thank you, Brad. 1318 01:05:00,563 --> 01:05:02,315 You are not gonna regret this. 1319 01:05:02,399 --> 01:05:03,358 Oh, he hung up. 1320 01:05:03,441 --> 01:05:05,235 [Doug] So with the studio's ringing endorsement, 1321 01:05:05,318 --> 01:05:08,488 we started shooting in the fall of 1976. 1322 01:05:08,988 --> 01:05:10,698 St. Louis, Missouri. 1323 01:05:13,243 --> 01:05:14,494 Close enough. 1324 01:05:14,828 --> 01:05:17,956 [Doug] It was a classic tale of slobs versus snobs. 1325 01:05:18,039 --> 01:05:19,916 The Deltas versus the Omegas. 1326 01:05:19,999 --> 01:05:22,627 We hired an ensemble of mostly unknown actors. 1327 01:05:22,710 --> 01:05:24,587 There's Tim Matheson in the orange sweater. 1328 01:05:24,671 --> 01:05:26,464 He's about to say the title of this movie. 1329 01:05:26,548 --> 01:05:28,967 A futile and stupid gesture be done-- 1330 01:05:29,050 --> 01:05:30,802 But we also needed a heavy hitter, 1331 01:05:30,885 --> 01:05:33,888 a comic superstar that we knew could deliver the goods. 1332 01:05:33,972 --> 01:05:36,433 And that's why we brought in this guy. 1333 01:05:36,516 --> 01:05:39,185 "Well, what the hell we supposed to do, you moron?" 1334 01:05:40,145 --> 01:05:41,771 I just memorized my one line. 1335 01:05:41,855 --> 01:05:43,064 You cannot shoot a scene 1336 01:05:43,148 --> 01:05:46,067 where they leave their dates behind at a black nightclub! 1337 01:05:46,151 --> 01:05:47,610 I'm not having this discussion. 1338 01:05:47,694 --> 01:05:48,611 -Okay, Doug. -Chris. 1339 01:05:48,695 --> 01:05:51,406 I can't stand by while someone refuses to have a discussion. 1340 01:05:51,489 --> 01:05:53,908 -Just calm down, Brad. -This goes too far. 1341 01:05:53,992 --> 01:05:56,661 You put this in front of an audience, we'll have race riots. 1342 01:05:56,744 --> 01:05:59,622 -More like laugh riots, am I right? -Doug, we're handling it. 1343 01:05:59,706 --> 01:06:02,459 -Who the fuck is this? -Doug Kenney, Chagrin Falls, Ohio. 1344 01:06:02,542 --> 01:06:05,378 -Hey, nice arm. You play tennis? -Damn right I play tennis. 1345 01:06:05,462 --> 01:06:08,173 -Doug is one of the writers. -And why is he annoying me? 1346 01:06:08,256 --> 01:06:09,674 I ask myself the same thing. 1347 01:06:09,757 --> 01:06:11,801 Actually, you wouldn't pay to have writers on set. 1348 01:06:11,885 --> 01:06:13,553 I'm here as an actor. It's a loophole. 1349 01:06:13,636 --> 01:06:17,307 Now, as for this nightclub scene, hey, it's funny and it's honest. 1350 01:06:17,390 --> 01:06:21,352 And I say this not only as a writer of the film, but as a black man. 1351 01:06:21,436 --> 01:06:24,647 I'm not risking the studio's reputation over a college movie! 1352 01:06:24,731 --> 01:06:27,150 Period, end of conversation, no. 1353 01:06:28,401 --> 01:06:29,360 Doug. 1354 01:06:45,168 --> 01:06:46,503 Food fight! 1355 01:06:47,462 --> 01:06:51,424 [Doug] Needless to say, the studio suits didn't like us, but fuck 'em. 1356 01:06:51,508 --> 01:06:52,842 We were making a movie. 1357 01:06:52,926 --> 01:06:55,678 ♪ Oh, no, baby, me gotta go ♪ 1358 01:06:55,762 --> 01:06:57,639 Animal House was the culmination 1359 01:06:57,722 --> 01:06:59,849 of everything we had written about in the magazine. 1360 01:07:00,475 --> 01:07:02,769 It was about power and class, 1361 01:07:02,852 --> 01:07:05,104 the individual versus authority. 1362 01:07:05,563 --> 01:07:09,484 Nostalgia for some innocent time that never really existed. 1363 01:07:09,567 --> 01:07:12,403 It was subversive. It celebrated chaos. 1364 01:07:12,487 --> 01:07:14,614 It was America in a nutshell. 1365 01:07:14,697 --> 01:07:16,366 Also, tits. 1366 01:07:17,534 --> 01:07:18,660 ♪ Let's go ♪ 1367 01:07:19,452 --> 01:07:21,204 [laughing] 1368 01:07:21,287 --> 01:07:24,707 [Doug] It shot to the top of the box office and stayed there, 1369 01:07:24,791 --> 01:07:27,544 becoming the biggest comedy in movie history. 1370 01:07:27,627 --> 01:07:30,880 [chanting] Toga. Toga. Toga. 1371 01:07:30,964 --> 01:07:33,341 [cheering and screaming] 1372 01:07:37,387 --> 01:07:39,722 [Doug] How did it feel to make a smash hit movie? 1373 01:07:40,306 --> 01:07:41,516 Pretty fucking great. 1374 01:07:42,850 --> 01:07:44,185 There was just one problem. 1375 01:07:44,894 --> 01:07:46,312 Where do you go from there? 1376 01:07:48,898 --> 01:07:50,608 I went for the full fondue set this time. 1377 01:07:50,692 --> 01:07:53,069 Comes with eight forks. It's cast-iron. 1378 01:07:53,152 --> 01:07:55,863 Wow, sounds like it's all really finally happening for you. 1379 01:07:55,947 --> 01:07:58,366 ♪ I'm talking to you ♪ 1380 01:07:58,449 --> 01:08:01,411 Doug. You. You, get over here. 1381 01:08:01,494 --> 01:08:02,620 Come here. 1382 01:08:02,704 --> 01:08:04,747 I knew it. I knew we had something special. 1383 01:08:04,831 --> 01:08:08,126 -I always knew that you would know that. -The kids were rioting in the aisles. 1384 01:08:08,209 --> 01:08:10,545 -Yeah, at least they weren't race riots. -Gimme a break. 1385 01:08:10,628 --> 01:08:12,630 You thought I was worried about that? I wasn't worried about that. 1386 01:08:12,714 --> 01:08:15,925 In fact, we had a screening for Richard Pryor. He thought it was fine. 1387 01:08:16,009 --> 01:08:17,552 -I mean, that's one cool cat. -Yeah. 1388 01:08:17,635 --> 01:08:19,137 He's a cool, cool cat. 1389 01:08:19,220 --> 01:08:21,639 -Hey, what are we doing next? -Well, you're a tool. 1390 01:08:21,723 --> 01:08:22,599 Great title! 1391 01:08:22,682 --> 01:08:24,183 Write it up. That's funny. 1392 01:08:25,018 --> 01:08:26,352 ♪ Whoa ♪ 1393 01:08:26,436 --> 01:08:28,313 Oh, it's nothing but a college movie. 1394 01:08:31,316 --> 01:08:34,444 They couldn't ask me for a rewrite? A couple of jokes? 1395 01:08:35,069 --> 01:08:36,654 Did I tell you how much I loved your movie? 1396 01:08:36,738 --> 01:08:38,323 Oh, the movie's not important. 1397 01:08:38,406 --> 01:08:40,074 What's important is you... 1398 01:08:40,158 --> 01:08:41,659 and how much you loved my movie. 1399 01:08:41,743 --> 01:08:45,371 Okay, now, listen. I made a big decision in the last 40 seconds. 1400 01:08:45,455 --> 01:08:47,624 I feel very strongly about it. 1401 01:08:47,707 --> 01:08:49,709 You are gonna come live with me in LA. 1402 01:08:49,792 --> 01:08:51,461 You want to move to Los Angeles? 1403 01:08:51,544 --> 01:08:55,340 No, no, no, LA. You know, Louisiana. They got gator on a stick down there. 1404 01:08:55,423 --> 01:08:58,551 -Think about it. A stick! -There he is! You crazy son of a bitch. 1405 01:08:59,552 --> 01:09:05,391 Listen, Matty. I wanted to tell you first. I think it's time to move to Hollywood. 1406 01:09:05,475 --> 01:09:08,394 We are thinking alike. I'm gonna open an office in Beverly Hills. 1407 01:09:08,478 --> 01:09:09,354 We are gonna hit it. 1408 01:09:09,437 --> 01:09:14,442 No. No, I'm leaving National Lampoon... for good this time. 1409 01:09:14,525 --> 01:09:18,154 Whoa. We got a hit movie. Okay? Now is not the time to leave. 1410 01:09:18,237 --> 01:09:19,822 Now's the time to make more. 1411 01:09:19,906 --> 01:09:22,992 You'll make other movies. They just won't involve me. 1412 01:09:23,660 --> 01:09:25,286 What about the magazine? 1413 01:09:25,745 --> 01:09:27,413 Weight Watchers will be fine without me. 1414 01:09:27,497 --> 01:09:29,415 -What about our magazine? -I know, I'm sorry. 1415 01:09:29,499 --> 01:09:32,126 Come on! You need me, Doug! You need me! 1416 01:09:32,210 --> 01:09:33,544 I do! I do! You're wonderful. 1417 01:10:01,114 --> 01:10:02,907 All right, what do you say, kid? 1418 01:10:02,990 --> 01:10:04,409 Let's make a picture, huh? 1419 01:10:05,576 --> 01:10:10,039 Himalayan Zen Buddhists who can down airplanes with their minds? 1420 01:10:10,123 --> 01:10:12,250 You can't tell me that's not a movie you wouldn't see. 1421 01:10:12,333 --> 01:10:14,335 -That's a lot of negatives. -I don't disagree. 1422 01:10:14,419 --> 01:10:17,588 Okay. Well, we could also talk about the prep school script, 1423 01:10:17,672 --> 01:10:20,675 or the treatment from Jules Feiffer, 1424 01:10:20,758 --> 01:10:23,219 or the, you know, Chris's thing about the resort. 1425 01:10:23,302 --> 01:10:26,639 I've got some work we should get to first. 1426 01:10:27,348 --> 01:10:29,142 Here, let me just move these. 1427 01:10:38,860 --> 01:10:39,944 If I must. 1428 01:10:41,779 --> 01:10:44,949 ♪ Yeah ♪ 1429 01:10:45,032 --> 01:10:48,077 ♪ They were soaring into the night ♪ 1430 01:10:48,911 --> 01:10:52,165 ♪ Won't touch ground ♪ 1431 01:11:00,590 --> 01:11:02,508 Hey, Mom! Hey! 1432 01:11:04,135 --> 01:11:07,096 Yeah. No, no, no. Kathryn's out of town. She's shooting a movie. 1433 01:11:07,722 --> 01:11:11,684 Uh... Yeah. Hey, so, listen, did they finish building the pool? 1434 01:11:13,603 --> 01:11:16,773 Does Dad like it? Like, is it big enough? 1435 01:11:17,940 --> 01:11:21,444 Like, you know, I made sure they were gonna do it nice and big. 1436 01:11:23,112 --> 01:11:26,032 Has he, like, been out there yet? Is that... 1437 01:11:28,201 --> 01:11:30,036 Oh, no, no, no. 1438 01:11:30,453 --> 01:11:31,829 Oh, uh... 1439 01:11:31,913 --> 01:11:33,831 Yeah. No, no, no, tomorrow's fine. 1440 01:11:33,915 --> 01:11:36,876 No, no, no. I mean-- Well... uh... 1441 01:11:36,959 --> 01:11:38,127 Mom. Mom. Mom. 1442 01:11:46,761 --> 01:11:48,888 Hey, Doug, I got your notes. 1443 01:11:48,971 --> 01:11:51,557 Also it kind of feels like you didn't really read the whole script. 1444 01:11:52,892 --> 01:11:53,768 Doug. 1445 01:11:55,603 --> 01:11:56,521 Hey. 1446 01:11:57,271 --> 01:11:59,565 Hey, you want to see what $2,000 of cocaine looks like? 1447 01:11:59,649 --> 01:12:01,442 No, I really want to talk about the script. 1448 01:12:01,526 --> 01:12:03,528 Wow, that's a lot of cocaine. 1449 01:12:03,611 --> 01:12:05,488 Got to spend my money on something. 1450 01:12:06,572 --> 01:12:07,657 Gotta go. 1451 01:12:08,366 --> 01:12:10,493 Are we really not gonna talk about the script? 1452 01:12:10,576 --> 01:12:12,411 Always go with your worst instincts. 1453 01:12:26,884 --> 01:12:28,845 Have you ever seen a person make their hand disappear? 1454 01:12:28,928 --> 01:12:30,012 Mm-hmm. 1455 01:12:30,096 --> 01:12:31,222 All right. 1456 01:12:32,056 --> 01:12:34,267 -Whoa! -[grunts] 1457 01:12:34,350 --> 01:12:35,810 [Kathryn] Wow, don't choke on that. 1458 01:12:36,644 --> 01:12:37,687 [mumbles] Kathryn! 1459 01:12:38,354 --> 01:12:40,273 I waited at the airport for two hours. 1460 01:12:40,773 --> 01:12:42,608 Oh, shit. I thought that was tomorrow. 1461 01:12:42,692 --> 01:12:44,402 Oh, that's all right. 1462 01:12:44,485 --> 01:12:46,904 You were busy planning this, uh... 1463 01:12:47,363 --> 01:12:48,531 A welcome home party? 1464 01:12:49,156 --> 01:12:50,449 Exactly! [chuckles] 1465 01:12:50,533 --> 01:12:53,911 Here, let me introduce you to my new friends. This is Missy? 1466 01:12:53,995 --> 01:12:55,413 If you want it to be. 1467 01:12:56,706 --> 01:12:57,540 It's Missy. 1468 01:12:59,542 --> 01:13:00,960 See you later, Missy. 1469 01:13:05,590 --> 01:13:07,508 Can you explain to me what is going on? 1470 01:13:07,592 --> 01:13:09,760 'Cause I haven't been able to reach you all week. 1471 01:13:09,844 --> 01:13:12,763 What? You know, I'm busy. I'm Hollywood's It Girl. 1472 01:13:12,847 --> 01:13:16,017 -That's hilarious. -It's-- Thank you. 1473 01:13:17,560 --> 01:13:20,187 This is a check for a $186,000. 1474 01:13:20,271 --> 01:13:22,398 Oh, I was wondering what happened to that. 1475 01:13:22,481 --> 01:13:23,399 That's great. 1476 01:13:23,482 --> 01:13:26,485 Good to find 186K, you know? 1477 01:13:26,569 --> 01:13:28,863 Put that right there in the check zone. Right there. 1478 01:13:28,946 --> 01:13:30,656 Oh, look at this. Have you seen this? 1479 01:13:30,740 --> 01:13:32,992 Super weird. I would've thought that Dwight D. Eisenhower 1480 01:13:33,075 --> 01:13:36,037 would have had like brains in his head, but no, it's just all cocaine. 1481 01:13:36,120 --> 01:13:37,079 [chuckles] 1482 01:13:37,163 --> 01:13:39,165 Oh, come on! [scoffs] 1483 01:13:39,248 --> 01:13:40,458 Come on. 1484 01:13:40,541 --> 01:13:45,087 Okay, you're very clearly upset that I'm having a party, is that it? 1485 01:13:45,546 --> 01:13:48,257 -I'll tell them all to leave. -No, we're talking right now. 1486 01:13:48,341 --> 01:13:51,093 -No, I'm gonna tell them to leave. -No, we're talking right now! 1487 01:13:55,056 --> 01:13:55,932 [sighs] 1488 01:14:00,645 --> 01:14:01,979 You need to see someone. 1489 01:14:02,563 --> 01:14:04,440 [scoffs] Oh, a shrink? 1490 01:14:04,523 --> 01:14:06,984 Oh, if I can tell him all about how little Dougie 1491 01:14:07,068 --> 01:14:08,819 needs to be the center of attention? 1492 01:14:08,903 --> 01:14:10,988 No. I just need to write another movie 1493 01:14:11,072 --> 01:14:13,658 so I can be the center of attention. 1494 01:14:13,741 --> 01:14:14,742 [sighs] 1495 01:14:18,579 --> 01:14:20,039 You're going to work right now? 1496 01:14:20,122 --> 01:14:24,210 There's a force in the universe that makes things happen. 1497 01:14:26,045 --> 01:14:26,879 What? 1498 01:14:26,963 --> 01:14:30,216 "Be the ball, Danny. 1499 01:14:31,050 --> 01:14:33,511 Be the ball." 1500 01:14:43,187 --> 01:14:44,689 [Chevy] In one model of the universe, 1501 01:14:44,772 --> 01:14:47,942 the shortest distance between two points is a straight line... 1502 01:14:49,151 --> 01:14:50,653 in the opposite direction, Danny. 1503 01:14:51,070 --> 01:14:53,322 -Unbelievable. -Thank you very little. 1504 01:14:53,698 --> 01:14:54,991 And... cut! 1505 01:14:56,075 --> 01:14:59,453 That's 48 takes. Maybe we should move on? 1506 01:14:59,537 --> 01:15:00,746 Couple more. 1507 01:15:00,830 --> 01:15:02,832 Chevy, let's go again. 1508 01:15:03,582 --> 01:15:04,709 [Chevy] Excuse you. 1509 01:15:04,792 --> 01:15:07,003 Harold's never directed. Doug's never produced. 1510 01:15:07,086 --> 01:15:08,713 Rodney's never acted. 1511 01:15:08,796 --> 01:15:10,089 What could possibly go wrong? 1512 01:15:11,090 --> 01:15:14,885 [Doug] Sure, it was a comedy about golf, but Caddyshack was personal. 1513 01:15:14,969 --> 01:15:18,973 A chance to get back at all the snobs and idiots my dad worked for 1514 01:15:19,056 --> 01:15:21,642 using some of America's finest comic actors. 1515 01:15:22,184 --> 01:15:24,270 And... action! 1516 01:15:25,938 --> 01:15:29,442 Rodney, when I call action, you need to start the scene. 1517 01:15:30,026 --> 01:15:31,902 -Okay, fine. -All right. 1518 01:15:32,570 --> 01:15:33,529 Action! 1519 01:15:34,697 --> 01:15:36,782 Hi, is this your first movie, too? 1520 01:15:36,866 --> 01:15:39,660 -I told my wife I was gonna be in a movie. -[Doug] No pressure, right? 1521 01:15:39,744 --> 01:15:42,580 All I had to do was top Animal House 1522 01:15:42,663 --> 01:15:44,957 and make the next biggest comedy of all time. 1523 01:15:46,625 --> 01:15:48,377 Oh, farts! 1524 01:15:48,878 --> 01:15:51,005 [Doug] It takes a lot of energy to make a hit movie. 1525 01:15:51,088 --> 01:15:54,592 Thankfully, to keep us going, we had energy powder. 1526 01:15:56,218 --> 01:15:59,013 [snorting] 1527 01:15:59,096 --> 01:16:00,056 ♪ Los Angeles ♪ 1528 01:16:00,139 --> 01:16:02,641 [Doug] Taking heavy fire! 1529 01:16:03,059 --> 01:16:05,603 You'll never catch me! 1530 01:16:06,270 --> 01:16:08,064 -Mayday! Mayday! -Whoo! 1531 01:16:08,147 --> 01:16:09,565 We're taking fire! 1532 01:16:09,648 --> 01:16:10,941 Hey, hold on. 1533 01:16:11,025 --> 01:16:12,902 Whoa! Ha ha! 1534 01:16:12,985 --> 01:16:14,278 [sighs] 1535 01:16:14,361 --> 01:16:20,034 ♪ Hey, Doug Kenney, there he is ♪ 1536 01:16:20,117 --> 01:16:21,577 Hey, buddy, how are you? 1537 01:16:21,660 --> 01:16:26,082 The handsomest man in comedy. Some call him the king of nostalgia. 1538 01:16:26,165 --> 01:16:29,752 ♪ A beautiful dreamer ♪ 1539 01:16:29,835 --> 01:16:31,921 He lives his life close to the edge. 1540 01:16:32,004 --> 01:16:36,342 He once wrote a novel and threw it in the trash. Who does that? 1541 01:16:36,425 --> 01:16:41,305 Doug Kenney! And here to tell Doug just how proud he is, 1542 01:16:41,388 --> 01:16:44,517 fresh from teaching tennis at the Chagrin Falls Country Club, 1543 01:16:44,600 --> 01:16:46,185 this guy's sharper than a dentist's drill. 1544 01:16:46,268 --> 01:16:49,396 Harry Kenney, what do you got to say, soul brother? 1545 01:16:49,480 --> 01:16:53,901 Son, you're a lefty weirdo. Huge disappointment. 1546 01:16:53,984 --> 01:16:55,069 [both laugh] 1547 01:16:55,736 --> 01:16:58,114 [Michael O'Keefe] Uh-oh, sounds bad. 1548 01:16:58,197 --> 01:16:59,365 You heard it here first. 1549 01:16:59,448 --> 01:17:02,660 He did not like his son. The wrong one died. 1550 01:17:02,743 --> 01:17:03,744 Bummer-ski. 1551 01:17:03,828 --> 01:17:05,621 Painful, baby, painful. 1552 01:17:05,704 --> 01:17:07,540 Oh, is that-- Could it be? 1553 01:17:07,623 --> 01:17:10,126 Live from New York, it's Henry Beard! 1554 01:17:10,209 --> 01:17:12,002 [applause] 1555 01:17:12,086 --> 01:17:14,338 We had a fine run, you and I. 1556 01:17:14,421 --> 01:17:19,426 Oh, no. I bet you wish you still had Beardy around to pick up the slack, 1557 01:17:19,510 --> 01:17:21,095 but you drove him out of your life, 1558 01:17:21,178 --> 01:17:24,682 just like you drove away Alex and will most likely drive away Kathryn. 1559 01:17:24,765 --> 01:17:26,308 Sensing a pattern. 1560 01:17:26,392 --> 01:17:28,227 It's not a pattern. 1561 01:17:28,310 --> 01:17:30,646 ♪ Oh, Dougie boy, the pipes ♪ 1562 01:17:30,729 --> 01:17:32,731 ♪ The pipes are calling ♪ 1563 01:17:32,815 --> 01:17:34,066 [Harold] You need to decide, Doug. 1564 01:17:35,442 --> 01:17:36,610 Doug! 1565 01:17:38,028 --> 01:17:41,490 Doug! We need to decide, is it clear he's jerking his dick off here? 1566 01:17:41,574 --> 01:17:44,827 Yeah, we could make it higher or lower, depending on the size of my dong. 1567 01:17:46,078 --> 01:17:48,414 We can get rid of these two scenes and move this down, 1568 01:17:48,497 --> 01:17:52,293 but then we need a transition, which we did not shoot. 1569 01:17:53,961 --> 01:17:56,130 We watched your first cut, all four hours of it. 1570 01:17:56,213 --> 01:17:57,590 Hi, Brad. How are you? 1571 01:17:57,673 --> 01:18:00,843 You know, I'm a friend of comedy. You guys know that. Okay? 1572 01:18:00,926 --> 01:18:04,763 But you are over budget, over schedule. This is not how we make movies here. 1573 01:18:04,847 --> 01:18:08,017 Brad. Brad, you better come back with a different attitude 1574 01:18:08,100 --> 01:18:09,268 or don't come back at all. 1575 01:18:09,351 --> 01:18:12,313 -[scoffs] Excuse me? -The fuck is that doing here? 1576 01:18:12,396 --> 01:18:15,024 That is the star of this movie, okay? 1577 01:18:15,107 --> 01:18:17,067 I want more scenes with this little guy. 1578 01:18:17,151 --> 01:18:18,235 That's not what we talked about. 1579 01:18:18,319 --> 01:18:21,197 I hired a guy from Star Wars to build this. People are gonna love this. 1580 01:18:23,699 --> 01:18:25,492 This isn't a fucking kid's movie. 1581 01:18:25,576 --> 01:18:28,204 I paid for this gopher, and he's gonna go in my picture. 1582 01:18:28,287 --> 01:18:29,455 Oh, "your" picture? 1583 01:18:29,538 --> 01:18:32,333 Kenney, this isn't your little magazine. I'm in charge. 1584 01:18:32,416 --> 01:18:35,169 Is that what you told your wife when you caught her fucking Peter Falk? 1585 01:18:35,252 --> 01:18:36,378 [Harold chuckles] 1586 01:18:36,879 --> 01:18:38,005 That's just a rumor. 1587 01:18:38,088 --> 01:18:41,717 Is his cock all squinty, too? Huh? 1588 01:18:41,800 --> 01:18:42,885 Oh, I'm gonna come! 1589 01:18:42,968 --> 01:18:44,595 [makes explosion sound] 1590 01:18:45,095 --> 01:18:47,890 [woman] How many of you have seen National Lampoon's Animal House? 1591 01:18:49,391 --> 01:18:51,936 Okay. Well, inside that bungalow to your right, 1592 01:18:52,019 --> 01:18:55,439 some of the creators of Animal House are working on their next movie. 1593 01:18:55,522 --> 01:18:57,608 And I'm sure it's gonna be just as crazy-- 1594 01:18:59,944 --> 01:19:00,945 Get off my lot! 1595 01:19:01,028 --> 01:19:02,905 -Doug! -You're crazy! 1596 01:19:05,032 --> 01:19:06,659 Get off! 1597 01:19:07,243 --> 01:19:08,911 -Cool! -[Doug] Ah! 1598 01:19:11,372 --> 01:19:12,206 Okay. 1599 01:19:13,415 --> 01:19:15,042 [yelling] 1600 01:19:15,125 --> 01:19:16,335 [Doug] I threw a few punches, 1601 01:19:16,418 --> 01:19:18,629 and the studio sidelined me from my own movie. 1602 01:19:18,712 --> 01:19:20,547 So much for Hollywood glamour. 1603 01:19:21,674 --> 01:19:23,592 And from there, things got worse. 1604 01:19:23,676 --> 01:19:26,971 I had an experience that shook me to my very core. 1605 01:19:27,054 --> 01:19:28,264 I saw this. 1606 01:19:28,806 --> 01:19:30,683 Can you fly this plane and land it? 1607 01:19:31,767 --> 01:19:33,143 Surely you can't be serious. 1608 01:19:33,227 --> 01:19:34,603 I am serious. 1609 01:19:34,687 --> 01:19:35,980 And don't call me Shirley. 1610 01:19:36,063 --> 01:19:37,439 [laughing] 1611 01:19:39,149 --> 01:19:40,609 [woman] Mr. Striker's the only one. 1612 01:19:45,239 --> 01:19:46,490 What's the matter? 1613 01:19:46,573 --> 01:19:48,284 Nothing. Everything's great. 1614 01:19:48,784 --> 01:19:51,370 Surely you're not upset because someone else made a funny movie. 1615 01:19:51,453 --> 01:19:52,788 Don't you get it? 1616 01:19:52,871 --> 01:19:54,790 That's the movie that everyone's gonna love, 1617 01:19:54,873 --> 01:19:56,875 not fucking Caddyshack. 1618 01:19:56,959 --> 01:19:58,127 I've been replaced. 1619 01:19:59,670 --> 01:20:01,547 [Doug] What the fuck am I gonna do now? 1620 01:20:02,089 --> 01:20:04,341 You're supposed to say, "Don't call me Shirley." 1621 01:20:06,051 --> 01:20:07,344 [answering machine beeps] 1622 01:20:08,304 --> 01:20:10,306 Um, hi, it's Doug. 1623 01:20:10,389 --> 01:20:12,141 I'm gonna be in town for a couple days. 1624 01:20:12,224 --> 01:20:16,770 I'd love to see you for, I don't know, a drink? 1625 01:20:16,854 --> 01:20:18,022 Maybe a beverage? 1626 01:20:19,023 --> 01:20:22,359 You know? I was right the first time. Let's make it a drink. 1627 01:20:31,785 --> 01:20:32,995 Hey! 1628 01:20:33,454 --> 01:20:35,622 -Look at you! -[chuckles] 1629 01:20:37,291 --> 01:20:39,209 You look great. You join a cult? 1630 01:20:39,710 --> 01:20:42,338 -I'm actually between cults right now. -Oh, okay. Okay. 1631 01:20:42,421 --> 01:20:43,339 A beer? 1632 01:20:45,382 --> 01:20:46,759 [sighs] 1633 01:20:48,510 --> 01:20:50,512 [chuckles] 1634 01:20:50,596 --> 01:20:51,513 Thank you. 1635 01:20:53,098 --> 01:20:54,266 You here for the movie? 1636 01:20:55,768 --> 01:20:57,353 Uh, yeah. 1637 01:20:58,562 --> 01:21:00,898 I have this press thing I got to do. 1638 01:21:00,981 --> 01:21:05,736 Oh, I can't wait for everyone to see the big fucking gopher extravaganza. 1639 01:21:07,029 --> 01:21:08,113 Proud day. 1640 01:21:09,031 --> 01:21:09,907 Thank you. 1641 01:21:11,033 --> 01:21:12,076 You all right? 1642 01:21:12,159 --> 01:21:14,036 I'm fine. I'm fine. 1643 01:21:14,703 --> 01:21:16,830 I'm better than the fucking movie. 1644 01:21:16,914 --> 01:21:18,916 -I'm sure it's great. -Ah. 1645 01:21:18,999 --> 01:21:22,836 You wrote the most successful comedy movie of all time on your first try. So... 1646 01:21:23,462 --> 01:21:25,381 Yeah, that was two years ago. 1647 01:21:26,465 --> 01:21:27,800 [chuckles] 1648 01:21:31,345 --> 01:21:34,056 So how about you? You still writing? 1649 01:21:34,890 --> 01:21:35,808 Uh... 1650 01:21:35,891 --> 01:21:36,725 Yeah. 1651 01:21:36,809 --> 01:21:37,976 Mm-hmm. 1652 01:21:38,685 --> 01:21:41,980 Little bit. I got a couple book ideas. 1653 01:21:42,940 --> 01:21:44,274 How about a movie? Huh? 1654 01:21:45,234 --> 01:21:48,904 I mean, we could write one together. 1655 01:21:49,863 --> 01:21:53,033 -I don't know, you're the movie guy now. -Oh, no, no, no. 1656 01:21:53,117 --> 01:21:55,035 Why don't you just come out and stay with me? 1657 01:21:55,119 --> 01:21:57,788 And we can, you know, throw around some ideas. 1658 01:21:58,956 --> 01:22:01,375 We're not really LA people. 1659 01:22:02,167 --> 01:22:04,294 Of course we are. What are you talking about? 1660 01:22:04,378 --> 01:22:05,504 It's beautiful. 1661 01:22:06,630 --> 01:22:08,715 There's the palm trees. 1662 01:22:14,680 --> 01:22:16,765 Oh. [chuckles] 1663 01:22:16,849 --> 01:22:19,435 You weren't talking about us. Okay. 1664 01:22:19,518 --> 01:22:20,853 I meant a lady. 1665 01:22:21,478 --> 01:22:23,397 -A woman. -Oh, my God, no. 1666 01:22:23,480 --> 01:22:25,732 -Henry Beard has a girlfriend. -Yep. 1667 01:22:25,816 --> 01:22:28,360 -Henry Beard! -You would like her. 1668 01:22:28,444 --> 01:22:31,530 She knows a lot about atomic energy. So... 1669 01:22:31,613 --> 01:22:33,198 -So sexy. -Mm-hmm. 1670 01:22:33,282 --> 01:22:35,284 Yeah, well, why don't you both come stay? 1671 01:22:36,201 --> 01:22:37,578 Both of you come out. 1672 01:22:37,661 --> 01:22:40,122 Now's not a good time. We're getting the house renovated, 1673 01:22:40,205 --> 01:22:42,833 and her daughter's in day camp. 1674 01:22:42,916 --> 01:22:44,334 Her daughter? 1675 01:22:45,210 --> 01:22:47,045 You have, like, a family. 1676 01:22:47,629 --> 01:22:50,632 You're an adult. [chuckles] 1677 01:22:50,716 --> 01:22:54,136 Oh, God. That must be a lot. 1678 01:22:55,095 --> 01:22:57,556 It's actually easier than running a magazine. 1679 01:22:59,224 --> 01:23:01,894 Yeah, I guess so. 1680 01:23:06,398 --> 01:23:09,693 -I'm so-- I'm-- I'd pick those up... -No, don't worry about it. It's all right. 1681 01:23:09,776 --> 01:23:11,445 -Don't worry about it. -What time's your-- 1682 01:23:12,237 --> 01:23:13,572 What time's your press thing? 1683 01:23:15,908 --> 01:23:16,992 [scoffs] 1684 01:23:17,075 --> 01:23:19,328 -I'm fine, okay? -I know. 1685 01:23:19,411 --> 01:23:20,704 I see what you're, uh... 1686 01:23:20,787 --> 01:23:25,417 No, I don't need you to take care of me, okay? 1687 01:23:25,501 --> 01:23:29,338 [chuckles] Now he wants to take care of me. Yeah. 1688 01:23:32,508 --> 01:23:34,092 I do care about you, Doug. 1689 01:23:38,388 --> 01:23:39,389 Well... 1690 01:23:39,932 --> 01:23:41,016 too late. 1691 01:23:43,060 --> 01:23:45,604 You know what? I'm happy that you reached out. 1692 01:23:47,314 --> 01:23:51,527 Yeah. Well, maybe I shouldn't have. I don't know how this feels. 1693 01:23:51,610 --> 01:23:54,196 -What are you talking about? -I-- I should go. 1694 01:23:54,863 --> 01:23:56,490 -Really? -Yeah. 1695 01:23:57,199 --> 01:24:00,202 Doug, you can call me anytime. 1696 01:24:02,621 --> 01:24:04,706 Thank you. Yeah, I will. 1697 01:24:06,291 --> 01:24:07,417 -I'm gonna take this. -Hey! 1698 01:24:07,918 --> 01:24:09,628 [Henry] It's all right. I got it. 1699 01:24:09,711 --> 01:24:12,297 -Should we call you a cab? -I'm a cab. 1700 01:24:14,132 --> 01:24:15,551 He called himself a cab. 1701 01:24:22,266 --> 01:24:23,392 [Brad] All right, folks. 1702 01:24:23,475 --> 01:24:27,896 Get your questions ready for the cast and crew of Caddyshack. 1703 01:24:31,275 --> 01:24:34,152 Okay, yeah. Okay, I think we're gonna get started. 1704 01:24:35,362 --> 01:24:38,282 You've all seen the movie. It's great, isn't it? 1705 01:24:38,865 --> 01:24:40,742 Yeah, it's a funny movie. 1706 01:24:41,618 --> 01:24:42,578 Really funny movie. 1707 01:24:42,661 --> 01:24:45,080 Oh, it sucked! 1708 01:24:45,706 --> 01:24:47,374 Didn't everybody think it was terrible? 1709 01:24:47,457 --> 01:24:50,836 Okay, this is-- Everyone, this is the hilarious Doug Kenney, our writer. 1710 01:24:50,919 --> 01:24:52,337 Douglas Kenney, everyone. 1711 01:24:53,171 --> 01:24:54,631 Okay, he's joking. 1712 01:24:54,715 --> 01:24:56,091 I'm not joking. 1713 01:24:56,174 --> 01:24:58,260 Fuck this fucking movie. 1714 01:24:58,343 --> 01:24:59,177 Fuck the gopher. 1715 01:24:59,261 --> 01:25:02,264 There was a mechanical gopher. It's not even a real gopher. 1716 01:25:02,764 --> 01:25:04,725 It's a piece of shit. 1717 01:25:04,808 --> 01:25:08,061 I don't know, I think this guy's a couple sandwiches short of a picnic. 1718 01:25:08,145 --> 01:25:08,979 [laughing] 1719 01:25:09,062 --> 01:25:11,607 That's the kind of shit that's in the movie! 1720 01:25:11,690 --> 01:25:13,025 -Hey. -[Doug stammers] 1721 01:25:13,108 --> 01:25:14,985 You guys, come on. What are you doing up there? 1722 01:25:15,068 --> 01:25:17,321 Are you talking about what a piece of shit it is? 1723 01:25:17,404 --> 01:25:19,323 -Honey, let's go. -Is that-- No, no, no. 1724 01:25:19,406 --> 01:25:23,410 I know I'm saying what a piece of shit it is a bunch, but I'm very proud of it. 1725 01:25:23,493 --> 01:25:25,829 This-- 'Cause I-- It's like my baby. 1726 01:25:25,912 --> 01:25:29,791 It's like a shit baby that I laid out there. 1727 01:25:29,875 --> 01:25:32,419 And I'm really proud of it. And I know we all are. 1728 01:25:32,502 --> 01:25:35,547 Doug! That's enough. 1729 01:25:36,882 --> 01:25:38,258 What are you guys doing here? 1730 01:25:38,342 --> 01:25:41,470 -You tell us. -Doug, you begged us to come. 1731 01:25:42,971 --> 01:25:43,889 I did? 1732 01:25:48,268 --> 01:25:51,480 Well, I guess you were right all along, huh? 1733 01:25:52,022 --> 01:25:54,524 It's just big fucking waste of time. 1734 01:25:56,652 --> 01:25:58,737 I'm a fucking piece of shit. 1735 01:25:59,988 --> 01:26:01,323 -[Kathryn] Oh! -[audience gasps] 1736 01:26:01,406 --> 01:26:02,532 [Kathryn] Okay. Hey. Hey. 1737 01:26:02,616 --> 01:26:04,576 Get him the hell out of here, please. 1738 01:26:06,912 --> 01:26:09,039 [Brad] Okay, sorry, everybody. 1739 01:26:09,122 --> 01:26:11,249 Yeah, well, just-- Let's-- 1740 01:26:11,333 --> 01:26:14,169 [Chevy] Buddy, why don't we go get some rest somewhere? 1741 01:26:15,379 --> 01:26:18,006 We should work together again, huh? 1742 01:26:27,474 --> 01:26:29,017 [grunts] 1743 01:26:29,101 --> 01:26:29,935 Blowjob! 1744 01:26:30,560 --> 01:26:31,561 Cocksucker! 1745 01:26:32,270 --> 01:26:33,230 Rim licker! 1746 01:26:33,313 --> 01:26:34,481 Cum-on-my-face! 1747 01:26:34,564 --> 01:26:35,565 Swollen balls! 1748 01:26:35,649 --> 01:26:37,317 -Balls-on-my-face! -Ronald Reagan! 1749 01:26:38,026 --> 01:26:39,152 Chevy! 1750 01:26:43,490 --> 01:26:44,533 What's today? 1751 01:26:46,201 --> 01:26:48,870 Well, it's Russian solstice, so... 1752 01:26:51,873 --> 01:26:52,874 Six. 1753 01:26:53,291 --> 01:26:55,127 No. It's a two. 1754 01:26:55,210 --> 01:26:56,211 Hmm. 1755 01:26:57,504 --> 01:26:58,547 I-- I-- 1756 01:26:58,630 --> 01:27:01,133 Dinah Shore is-- No. 1757 01:27:02,926 --> 01:27:04,636 Oh, I got it. Doug... 1758 01:27:06,763 --> 01:27:07,806 It's Thursday. 1759 01:27:10,183 --> 01:27:12,352 -That's six days clean. -Feels good. 1760 01:27:12,436 --> 01:27:13,854 It feels great. 1761 01:27:14,563 --> 01:27:16,314 I haven't felt this healthy in years. 1762 01:27:16,398 --> 01:27:17,941 I feel like myself again. 1763 01:27:19,443 --> 01:27:20,527 [Doug sighs] 1764 01:27:23,947 --> 01:27:25,365 -You think we should-- -I'll call my guy. 1765 01:27:34,374 --> 01:27:36,501 We'll just have the one ball, right? 1766 01:27:37,085 --> 01:27:37,919 One ball. 1767 01:27:42,132 --> 01:27:44,718 -You're the handsomest man in comedy. -Second handsomest. 1768 01:27:44,801 --> 01:27:48,430 ...96, 97, 98, 99, 93, 94, 95, 96... 1769 01:27:49,097 --> 01:27:50,515 -Am I bothering you? -No. 1770 01:27:52,350 --> 01:27:53,393 93, 94, 95... 1771 01:27:53,477 --> 01:27:55,312 182, 83, 84, 85. 1772 01:27:57,564 --> 01:27:58,398 You win. 1773 01:27:58,482 --> 01:28:02,319 "Caddyshack never finds a consistent comic note of its own, 1774 01:28:02,402 --> 01:28:05,739 but it plays host to all sorts of approaches from its stars, 1775 01:28:06,364 --> 01:28:09,618 who sometimes hardly seem to be occupying the same movie." 1776 01:28:10,076 --> 01:28:13,413 I just think it's weird the Pope is weighing in on this at all. 1777 01:28:13,497 --> 01:28:14,539 You know? 1778 01:28:18,293 --> 01:28:20,796 Oh, that was so rude of me. I never even offered you any nuts. 1779 01:28:23,423 --> 01:28:25,634 So what else did the Pope have to say? 1780 01:28:26,593 --> 01:28:28,053 Anything worth note? 1781 01:28:29,304 --> 01:28:30,347 [Kathryn] Doug? 1782 01:28:35,310 --> 01:28:36,937 -Hey! Babe. -Hi. 1783 01:28:37,020 --> 01:28:39,648 -What's up, babe? Hey, hey, hey. -Hi. 1784 01:28:39,731 --> 01:28:40,690 [Doug] Mmm. 1785 01:28:40,774 --> 01:28:41,608 -Oh. -[Kathryn] Hi. 1786 01:28:43,235 --> 01:28:45,320 Wait, where's, uh... Chevy? 1787 01:28:46,321 --> 01:28:48,031 I thought he left last night. 1788 01:28:49,199 --> 01:28:52,661 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, last night. Of course. Yeah. 1789 01:28:52,744 --> 01:28:53,578 Oh, hey. 1790 01:28:53,662 --> 01:28:57,374 God, look at this place. He forgot to-- Chevy forgot to-- 1791 01:28:57,457 --> 01:29:02,921 I asked him to, like, vacuum and stuff, and he obviously did not vacuum. 1792 01:29:03,004 --> 01:29:05,006 He forgot to do it, so let me clean up a little. 1793 01:29:05,090 --> 01:29:07,050 There. There we go. 1794 01:29:07,133 --> 01:29:10,762 And then let's-- You know, let's go, snorkeling. Right? 1795 01:29:10,846 --> 01:29:12,430 Oh, it's good to see you. 1796 01:29:14,933 --> 01:29:19,521 Once the new house is furnished, I thought maybe we could throw a party. 1797 01:29:20,105 --> 01:29:21,815 Maybe over Labor Day. 1798 01:29:22,941 --> 01:29:25,902 -You'll be back home by then. -Yeah, of course. 1799 01:29:26,278 --> 01:29:27,445 I think so. 1800 01:29:29,281 --> 01:29:30,198 Doug. 1801 01:29:32,576 --> 01:29:33,869 You need to decide. 1802 01:29:36,621 --> 01:29:37,956 On the furniture? 1803 01:29:38,039 --> 01:29:40,625 Don't make me choose between Pennsylvania Dutch and Colonial. 1804 01:29:40,709 --> 01:29:41,710 -You know I'm torn. -Doug. 1805 01:29:41,793 --> 01:29:44,254 You need to decide if you're serious about getting better. 1806 01:29:44,337 --> 01:29:46,673 You can't just stay here forever. 1807 01:29:47,507 --> 01:29:51,219 It's a tropical paradise. I mean, the coconuts literally grow on trees here. 1808 01:29:51,303 --> 01:29:52,220 Stop. 1809 01:29:55,765 --> 01:29:57,183 -You don't understand. -Tell me. 1810 01:29:57,267 --> 01:29:58,810 What don't I understand? Tell me. 1811 01:29:59,352 --> 01:30:00,395 Well, I'm-- 1812 01:30:01,271 --> 01:30:04,983 I'm not good at, you know, this. 1813 01:30:05,483 --> 01:30:07,068 -What is this? -This. 1814 01:30:07,152 --> 01:30:10,155 You know. This. Relationships. 1815 01:30:10,238 --> 01:30:12,490 You know, talking about my feelings. 1816 01:30:12,574 --> 01:30:14,743 You want me to come back. I want to come back. 1817 01:30:14,826 --> 01:30:16,578 I can't come back a failure. 1818 01:30:17,704 --> 01:30:19,831 In what world are you a failure? 1819 01:30:22,292 --> 01:30:24,127 You need to get it together, okay? 1820 01:30:24,836 --> 01:30:26,588 Definitely. Yes. Yes. 1821 01:30:29,591 --> 01:30:33,261 If you can't have a real conversation with me, you got to talk to someone. 1822 01:30:34,346 --> 01:30:36,181 Yeah, well, who would I talk to? 1823 01:30:37,098 --> 01:30:38,850 I don't know. Can you call Henry? 1824 01:30:42,395 --> 01:30:43,855 Just call him, okay? 1825 01:31:08,797 --> 01:31:11,758 [TV playing] 1826 01:31:26,064 --> 01:31:27,315 [knock on door] 1827 01:31:27,774 --> 01:31:29,025 [woman] Beautiful day today. 1828 01:31:29,109 --> 01:31:30,402 -Yeah. -You going surfing? 1829 01:31:30,985 --> 01:31:33,363 I was thinking about going hiking, actually. 1830 01:31:33,446 --> 01:31:35,657 Sounds nice. Where are you from? 1831 01:31:38,535 --> 01:31:40,245 Chagrin Falls, Ohio. 1832 01:32:14,362 --> 01:32:16,406 [phone ringing] 1833 01:32:16,489 --> 01:32:18,158 [Henry] No, I'll pass. 1834 01:32:18,241 --> 01:32:22,120 Isn't downhill skiing just a competition to see who can get to the hospital first? 1835 01:32:22,203 --> 01:32:23,830 [laughing] 1836 01:32:26,374 --> 01:32:27,375 Excuse me. 1837 01:32:27,876 --> 01:32:29,335 [woman] Henry's more of a sailor. 1838 01:32:29,419 --> 01:32:32,255 He's gonna take my daughter on his boat for her sixth birthday. 1839 01:32:32,338 --> 01:32:33,506 Right, Henry? 1840 01:32:33,590 --> 01:32:34,674 It's tempting. 1841 01:32:56,571 --> 01:32:58,573 [chattering] 1842 01:32:58,656 --> 01:33:00,325 No, he fell. 1843 01:33:00,408 --> 01:33:02,285 -I was with him two days before. -Right. 1844 01:33:02,368 --> 01:33:04,913 -That's not the state he was in. -Well, I think he jumped. 1845 01:33:04,996 --> 01:33:08,958 No, he got high, and he went too far like he always does, and he fell. 1846 01:33:09,042 --> 01:33:12,170 He probably fell while he was looking for a place to jump. 1847 01:33:15,757 --> 01:33:17,217 [harmonica playing] 1848 01:33:18,218 --> 01:33:19,177 Hi. 1849 01:33:20,762 --> 01:33:22,222 Well, he's in heaven now, 1850 01:33:22,305 --> 01:33:24,766 sticking his dick in Eleanor Roosevelt's ear. 1851 01:33:25,350 --> 01:33:27,060 He was just so young. 1852 01:33:27,143 --> 01:33:28,394 Can't believe he's gone. 1853 01:33:30,814 --> 01:33:33,483 How can you eat shrimp at a time like this? 1854 01:33:35,485 --> 01:33:36,444 Yeah. 1855 01:33:37,195 --> 01:33:39,197 We gave them our golden boy, 1856 01:33:40,198 --> 01:33:41,741 and they sent back his body. 1857 01:33:42,158 --> 01:33:44,494 You know, the saddest part of this whole thing 1858 01:33:46,287 --> 01:33:49,791 is that he wasn't holding hands with Chevy when he went off that cliff. 1859 01:33:50,542 --> 01:33:53,461 He was like a son to me. I loved him. Although, sometimes I wanted... 1860 01:33:53,545 --> 01:33:55,505 -to cut the brakes on his car. -Mm-hmm. 1861 01:33:55,588 --> 01:33:56,923 You know, without telling him. 1862 01:33:57,465 --> 01:34:00,885 A boxing phenomenon who desperately wants to work at a brassiere factory. 1863 01:34:01,553 --> 01:34:02,887 This is a movie idea? 1864 01:34:04,681 --> 01:34:05,598 Yes. 1865 01:34:06,182 --> 01:34:07,892 [man] He was one of the nicest guys. 1866 01:34:13,356 --> 01:34:14,190 [Doug] Nice suit. 1867 01:34:16,067 --> 01:34:17,777 -You can see me? -Mm-hmm. 1868 01:34:17,861 --> 01:34:19,153 I'm the older you. 1869 01:34:19,654 --> 01:34:21,531 If you didn't... you know. 1870 01:34:21,614 --> 01:34:22,866 So you're... 1871 01:34:22,949 --> 01:34:25,410 Yeah. A narrative device. 1872 01:34:25,493 --> 01:34:27,036 -It's a choice. Yeah. -Mm-hmm. 1873 01:34:28,705 --> 01:34:29,831 Wow, look at this. 1874 01:34:31,082 --> 01:34:33,751 You were beloved by so many white people. 1875 01:34:37,338 --> 01:34:42,176 If it's any consolation, years from now people really like Caddyshack. 1876 01:34:42,760 --> 01:34:44,762 They're kind of annoying about it, actually. 1877 01:34:51,644 --> 01:34:53,146 Go ahead. Talk to 'em. 1878 01:35:03,239 --> 01:35:06,200 Well, now you have a matched set. 1879 01:35:10,204 --> 01:35:11,664 He was so loved. 1880 01:35:17,420 --> 01:35:18,963 And all these people... 1881 01:35:20,465 --> 01:35:21,674 they all loved him. 1882 01:35:24,135 --> 01:35:25,386 [sobs] 1883 01:35:33,144 --> 01:35:36,898 Every funny person in the world is here, and no one's laughing. 1884 01:35:40,193 --> 01:35:41,778 You know, he's right. 1885 01:35:42,403 --> 01:35:44,989 Come on, people. Laugh, God damn it! 1886 01:35:45,615 --> 01:35:47,325 Come on! Somebody! 1887 01:35:49,994 --> 01:35:50,995 Henry. 1888 01:35:58,419 --> 01:35:59,337 Henry... 1889 01:36:00,505 --> 01:36:02,006 I'm sorry about everything. 1890 01:36:04,217 --> 01:36:05,969 I know you accept my apology. 1891 01:36:06,052 --> 01:36:09,597 I mean, you were wrong, too. We don't have to get into that now. 1892 01:36:10,431 --> 01:36:14,978 But this situation absolutely requires 1893 01:36:15,061 --> 01:36:17,480 a really futile and stupid gesture. 1894 01:36:22,944 --> 01:36:24,278 Do it, Henry. 1895 01:36:32,370 --> 01:36:33,496 [woman] Oh. 1896 01:36:37,583 --> 01:36:39,544 Food fight! 1897 01:36:39,627 --> 01:36:41,087 [cheering] 1898 01:36:46,968 --> 01:36:50,847 ♪ Beautiful dreamer ♪ 1899 01:36:51,764 --> 01:36:54,976 ♪ Wake unto me ♪ 1900 01:36:55,059 --> 01:36:57,979 ♪ Starlight and dew drops ♪ 1901 01:36:58,062 --> 01:37:01,190 ♪ Waiting for thee ♪ 1902 01:37:02,150 --> 01:37:05,695 ♪ Sounds of the rude world ♪ 1903 01:37:05,778 --> 01:37:09,073 ♪ Heard in the day ♪ 1904 01:37:09,157 --> 01:37:12,035 ♪ Led by the moonlight ♪ 1905 01:37:12,118 --> 01:37:14,746 ♪ Have all passed away ♪ 1906 01:37:16,831 --> 01:37:20,585 ♪ Beautiful dreamer ♪ 1907 01:37:20,668 --> 01:37:23,713 ♪ Queen of my song ♪ 1908 01:37:24,505 --> 01:37:29,052 ♪ List' while I woo thee ♪ 1909 01:37:29,135 --> 01:37:34,515 ♪ With soft melodies ♪ 1910 01:37:35,016 --> 01:37:38,603 ♪ Gone are the cares of ♪ 1911 01:37:38,686 --> 01:37:42,482 ♪ Life's busy throng ♪ 1912 01:37:42,565 --> 01:37:45,068 ♪ Beautiful dreamer ♪ 1913 01:37:45,151 --> 01:37:47,987 ♪ Wake unto me ♪ 1914 01:37:50,031 --> 01:37:55,453 ♪ Beautiful dreamer ♪ 1915 01:37:55,536 --> 01:37:58,372 ♪ Wake un... ♪ 1916 01:38:01,167 --> 01:38:04,170 ♪ To me ♪ 1917 01:38:07,173 --> 01:38:10,760 ♪ If I woke up to find That it's all been a joke ♪ 1918 01:38:11,344 --> 01:38:13,471 ♪ And I was deaf, dumb and blind ♪ 1919 01:38:14,263 --> 01:38:16,099 ♪ And homeless and broke ♪ 1920 01:38:18,101 --> 01:38:21,854 ♪ I hope I've learned Not to be too concerned ♪ 1921 01:38:23,856 --> 01:38:26,317 ♪ It isn't as if I died ♪ 1922 01:38:27,693 --> 01:38:29,529 ♪ But let's say I had ♪ 1923 01:38:30,279 --> 01:38:32,281 ♪ Would that be all that bad? ♪ 1924 01:38:33,908 --> 01:38:37,161 ♪ Hey, I've had a hell of a ride ♪ 1925 01:38:40,039 --> 01:38:42,959 ♪ I've had the time of my life ♪ 1926 01:38:43,042 --> 01:38:46,170 ♪ It's all been milk and honey ♪ 1927 01:38:48,798 --> 01:38:50,633 ♪ A walk in the park ♪ 1928 01:38:50,716 --> 01:38:53,886 ♪ A stroll down Easy Street ♪ 1929 01:38:56,389 --> 01:38:58,558 ♪ And a beautiful wife ♪ 1930 01:38:58,641 --> 01:39:01,519 ♪ And pockets full of money ♪ 1931 01:39:04,313 --> 01:39:07,984 ♪ Me oh my, did we get high ♪ 1932 01:39:08,693 --> 01:39:10,695 ♪ Life was oh so sweet ♪ 1933 01:39:12,405 --> 01:39:15,241 ♪ And every morning when I'd awake ♪ 1934 01:39:15,324 --> 01:39:18,369 ♪ Was a smile upon my face ♪ 1935 01:39:19,912 --> 01:39:22,707 ♪ I'd take a look around And I'd say ♪ 1936 01:39:23,416 --> 01:39:26,252 ♪ I fucking own this place ♪ 1937 01:39:26,335 --> 01:39:28,254 ♪ And if I fall off a cliff ♪ 1938 01:39:28,337 --> 01:39:30,089 ♪ And I'm saying if ♪ 1939 01:39:30,173 --> 01:39:32,967 ♪ It was just what I wanted to do ♪ 1940 01:39:34,802 --> 01:39:37,722 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1941 01:39:38,556 --> 01:39:40,933 ♪ All my dreams came true ♪ 1942 01:39:48,357 --> 01:39:50,401 ♪ Never had a problem ♪ 1943 01:39:50,484 --> 01:39:51,736 ♪ Unh-unh ♪ 1944 01:39:51,819 --> 01:39:53,738 ♪ I never had a care ♪ 1945 01:39:55,573 --> 01:39:58,201 ♪ Still can wear my high school jeans ♪ 1946 01:39:58,284 --> 01:40:01,245 ♪ And I still have all my hair ♪ 1947 01:40:01,787 --> 01:40:03,915 ♪ And when they lower the lid ♪ 1948 01:40:03,998 --> 01:40:05,541 ♪ On all that I did ♪ 1949 01:40:05,625 --> 01:40:08,669 ♪ Well, I promise you, kid That it's true ♪ 1950 01:40:10,213 --> 01:40:13,716 ♪ I've had the time of my life ♪ 1951 01:40:13,799 --> 01:40:16,052 ♪ 'Cause that's what dreamers do ♪ 1952 01:40:20,139 --> 01:40:22,141 ♪ All my dreams ♪ 1953 01:40:22,934 --> 01:40:24,352 ♪ Came true ♪ 1954 01:40:29,815 --> 01:40:32,985 -♪ 'Cause I've had the time of my life ♪ -[group] ♪ Whoo! ♪ 1955 01:40:33,069 --> 01:40:34,820 [group] ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1956 01:40:34,904 --> 01:40:36,989 ♪ Just the time of my life ♪ 1957 01:40:37,073 --> 01:40:38,783 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1958 01:40:38,866 --> 01:40:40,785 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1959 01:40:40,868 --> 01:40:42,495 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1960 01:40:42,578 --> 01:40:44,455 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1961 01:40:44,538 --> 01:40:46,374 -[Doug] What did you have? -[group] ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1962 01:40:46,457 --> 01:40:48,376 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1963 01:40:48,459 --> 01:40:50,419 -[Doug] Uh-huh. -[group] ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1964 01:40:50,503 --> 01:40:52,129 -[Doug] What did you have? -♪ The time of my life ♪ 1965 01:40:52,213 --> 01:40:54,298 -[Doug] Good! -♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1966 01:40:54,382 --> 01:40:56,592 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1967 01:40:56,676 --> 01:40:58,135 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1968 01:40:58,219 --> 01:41:00,471 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1969 01:41:00,554 --> 01:41:01,973 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1970 01:41:02,056 --> 01:41:03,975 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1971 01:41:04,058 --> 01:41:05,643 ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1972 01:41:05,726 --> 01:41:07,728 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1973 01:41:07,812 --> 01:41:09,355 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1974 01:41:09,438 --> 01:41:11,315 ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1975 01:41:11,399 --> 01:41:13,234 ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1976 01:41:13,317 --> 01:41:14,860 ♪ It was the time of my life ♪ 1977 01:41:14,944 --> 01:41:17,989 [Doug] ♪ I had the time of my life ♪ 1978 01:41:20,491 --> 01:41:21,617 [laughing] 1979 01:41:21,701 --> 01:41:23,786 [cheers and applause]