1
00:01:50,333 --> 00:01:51,301
Yo.

2
00:01:51,502 --> 00:01:53,530
Hey, I Was doing some research
for next year...

3
00:01:53,741 --> 00:01:56,645
...and I think I figured out
Which Website I Wanna subscribe to.

4
00:01:56,847 --> 00:01:59,877
- The Vag-tastic Voyage.
- Which one is the Vag-tastic Voyage?

5
00:02:00,087 --> 00:02:01,852
<i>The Vag-tastic Voyage</i>
<i>is the one where...</i>

6
00:02:02,058 --> 00:02:05,361
<i>... they find random girls on the street,</i>
<i>and they invite them into a van...</i>

7
00:02:05,566 --> 00:02:07,331
...and then they bang them
in the van.

8
00:02:07,536 --> 00:02:08,800
It's like 13 bucks a month...

9
00:02:09,006 --> 00:02:10,669
...and you get access
to other sites.

10
00:02:10,877 --> 00:02:15,182
Like one's Latina, one's Asian,
you knoW, there's one for fetishes...

11
00:02:15,386 --> 00:02:17,880
...like feet and pee-pee and shit
and stuff like that.

12
00:02:18,092 --> 00:02:19,857
That's disgusting.
You're like an animal.

13
00:02:20,063 --> 00:02:22,534
I'm... What? I'm disgusting?
You're the Weird one, man.

14
00:02:22,736 --> 00:02:24,706
Don't make me feel Weird
because I like porn.

15
00:02:24,907 --> 00:02:27,208
You're Weird for not liking porn.
I'm normal as shit.

16
00:02:27,412 --> 00:02:29,177
Peeing on people. That's normal?

17
00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:31,718
Evan, I'm not saying
I'm gonna look at it.

18
00:02:31,922 --> 00:02:34,290
I'm just saying that
it comes With the site, okay?

19
00:02:34,494 --> 00:02:36,862
I don't knoW What I'm gonna be into
10 years from noW.

20
00:02:37,066 --> 00:02:38,763
I'm just sick of all the amateur stuff.

21
00:02:38,970 --> 00:02:42,136
I mean, like, if I'm paying top dollar,
I Want a little production value.

22
00:02:42,344 --> 00:02:45,077
Like some editing, transition,
something. Some music.

23
00:02:45,284 --> 00:02:49,122
Yeah, Well, I'm sorry the Coen brothers
don't direct the porn that I Watch.

24
00:02:49,325 --> 00:02:50,885
They're hard to get ahold of, okay?

25
00:02:51,095 --> 00:02:53,932
Plus your parents are gonna be
looking at the bill, dipshit.

26
00:02:54,136 --> 00:02:58,544
Yeah, you're right. I probably should
pick the one With the least dirty name.

27
00:03:00,749 --> 00:03:02,845
What about, like, Perfect Ten?

28
00:03:03,055 --> 00:03:04,854
Something like that, you knoW?

29
00:03:05,059 --> 00:03:06,619
Like Perfect Ten?

30
00:03:06,829 --> 00:03:08,662
Because that could be
any number of things.

31
00:03:08,866 --> 00:03:12,237
They can't really get you for that.
That could be, like, a boWling Website.

32
00:03:12,976 --> 00:03:16,472
Yeah, but they don't really shoW dick
going in, Which is a huge concern.

33
00:03:16,683 --> 00:03:17,651
I didn't realize that.

34
00:03:17,852 --> 00:03:20,415
Plus, have you ever seen
a vagina by itself?

35
00:03:21,761 --> 00:03:23,024
Not for me.

36
00:03:23,231 --> 00:03:24,665
Hi.

37
00:03:25,535 --> 00:03:28,667
- Thanks for taking him, Seth.
- No... No problem, Jane.

38
00:03:28,876 --> 00:03:31,108
- HoW are you?
- Good.

39
00:03:31,315 --> 00:03:32,908
Beautiful.

40
00:03:33,887 --> 00:03:35,515
- Don't touch that.
- What are you...?

41
00:03:35,724 --> 00:03:37,819
- I'm not a piece of meat.
- You tWo are funny.

42
00:03:38,630 --> 00:03:41,796
I can't imagine What you're gonna do
Without each other next year.

43
00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:44,031
Evan told me
you didn't get into Dartmouth.

44
00:03:44,877 --> 00:03:48,908
I got into some schools, some
pretty good ones. So I'll be fine.

45
00:03:49,119 --> 00:03:52,114
- You gonna miss each other?
- No. Miss each other? No, thank you.

46
00:03:52,325 --> 00:03:53,885
I don't... I don't miss each other.

47
00:03:54,096 --> 00:03:55,895
I'm gonna cry myself
to sleep every night.

48
00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:57,660
- Me too.
- When I'm out partying.

49
00:03:57,870 --> 00:03:59,464
Go to school, boys.

50
00:04:00,042 --> 00:04:02,639
- Bye, Mom.
- Bye, Jane.

51
00:04:03,983 --> 00:04:08,688
I am truly jealous you got to suck
on those tits When you Were a baby.

52
00:04:08,894 --> 00:04:11,798
Yeah, Well, at least you got to
suck on your dad's dick.

53
00:04:24,127 --> 00:04:26,154
Hey, Seth,
you can't park in the faculty lot.

54
00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:29,269
Don't be such a vagine, man.
I gotta get a Red Bull before class.

55
00:04:30,941 --> 00:04:33,434
You're being an idiot.
You shouldn't have parked there.

56
00:04:33,647 --> 00:04:35,172
Fuck it. I'm about to graduate.

57
00:04:35,384 --> 00:04:38,151
They should be sucking
on my ball sac.

58
00:04:38,958 --> 00:04:42,089
It's the least they could do
for stealing three years of my life.

59
00:04:45,205 --> 00:04:48,770
- Oh, fuck me.
- Look at those nipples.

60
00:04:48,979 --> 00:04:50,915
They're like little baby toes.

61
00:04:51,117 --> 00:04:53,179
It's not fair
they get to flaunt that stuff...

62
00:04:53,389 --> 00:04:55,484
...and I have to hide
every erection I get.

63
00:04:55,694 --> 00:04:58,324
You knoW What I do?
I flip my boner up into my Waistband.

64
00:04:58,533 --> 00:05:00,526
It hides it and it feels aWesome.

65
00:05:00,737 --> 00:05:03,174
I almost bleW a load
into my bellybutton.

66
00:05:03,376 --> 00:05:06,348
I mean, just imagine if girls Weren't
Weirded out by our boners...

67
00:05:06,550 --> 00:05:08,213
...and just, like,
Wanted to see them.

68
00:05:08,421 --> 00:05:11,518
I mean, that's the World
I one day Wanna live in.

69
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:14,859
It's been tWo years since I've seen
an actual human female nipple.

70
00:05:15,068 --> 00:05:17,039
Shauna?
Shauna Was tWo years ago noW?

71
00:05:17,240 --> 00:05:18,208
Yeah.

72
00:05:18,408 --> 00:05:20,845
Yeah, I guess so.
But she Was insanely hot.

73
00:05:21,047 --> 00:05:24,248
Exactly. She Was too hot, okay?
That's What sucks.

74
00:05:24,455 --> 00:05:26,721
HoW can that suck?
I'd be psyched if I got With her.

75
00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:28,418
You got, like, tWo dozen handjobs.

76
00:05:28,631 --> 00:05:31,330
Yes, and three-quarters of a bloWjob,
but Who's counting?

77
00:05:31,536 --> 00:05:33,631
Look, it Was the peak
of my ass-getting career...

78
00:05:33,841 --> 00:05:35,401
...and it happened Way too early.

79
00:05:35,611 --> 00:05:37,548
- You're like Orson Welles.
- Exactly!

80
00:05:37,750 --> 00:05:40,244
If I'd paced myself,
I'd be having at least steady sex...

81
00:05:40,455 --> 00:05:41,753
...With a decent-looking girl.

82
00:05:41,959 --> 00:05:44,931
I honestly see noW Why Orson Welles
ate his fat ass to death.

83
00:05:45,132 --> 00:05:46,931
You'll have sex in college,
everyone does.

84
00:05:47,136 --> 00:05:50,234
But the point is to be good at sex
by the time you get to college.

85
00:05:50,443 --> 00:05:53,279
You don't Want girls thinking
you suck dick at fucking pussy.

86
00:05:53,482 --> 00:05:55,453
I still think you have
a chance With Jules.

87
00:05:55,654 --> 00:05:57,453
She got incredibly hot over
last summer...

88
00:05:57,658 --> 00:05:59,628
...and she obviously
hasn't realized it yet...

89
00:05:59,830 --> 00:06:02,495
...because she's still talking to you
and flirting With you.

90
00:06:02,703 --> 00:06:05,732
Are you out of your mind?
Look at Jules' dating record, okay?

91
00:06:05,942 --> 00:06:09,279
She dated Dan Remick, Who's had
a six-pack since, like, kindergarten.

92
00:06:09,483 --> 00:06:13,048
Jason Stone, Who looks like
fucking Zack Morris. And Matt Muir.

93
00:06:13,258 --> 00:06:15,524
Matt Muir.
He's the sWeetest guy ever.

94
00:06:15,731 --> 00:06:17,564
Have you ever stared into his eyes?

95
00:06:17,768 --> 00:06:20,331
It Was like the first time
I heard the Beatles.

96
00:06:21,509 --> 00:06:23,604
Why Would she end
her high school career With me?

97
00:06:23,814 --> 00:06:25,841
Becca dated Eric Rosecrantz
for like tWo years.

98
00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:29,355
Yeah, but he's a fucking idiot.
You're a step up from that dick-load.

99
00:06:29,559 --> 00:06:31,654
That's Why you need to stop...
Will you get this?

100
00:06:31,865 --> 00:06:34,267
That's Why you need to stop
being a pussy and nail her.

101
00:06:34,470 --> 00:06:36,235
You could bang her
before you leave.

102
00:06:36,441 --> 00:06:39,379
And I'm not gonna dance around it,
she looks like a good fucker.

103
00:06:39,580 --> 00:06:41,983
I'm tired of you talking
about her like that, man.

104
00:06:42,186 --> 00:06:45,648
What, you can talk about her all day
and if I say one thing, it's blasphemy?

105
00:06:45,860 --> 00:06:47,420
Well, I don't constantly insult her.

106
00:06:47,631 --> 00:06:49,032
I'm not trying to insult her.

107
00:06:49,234 --> 00:06:51,762
I'm just saying that
she looks like a good fucker, okay?

108
00:06:51,973 --> 00:06:53,499
She looks like she can take a dick.

109
00:06:53,710 --> 00:06:56,273
Some Women pride themselves
on their dick-taking abilities.

110
00:06:56,483 --> 00:06:59,388
Dick-taking abilities? You think
that's good to say about someone?

111
00:06:59,590 --> 00:07:01,787
The fucked-up thing is,
I actually do, okay?

112
00:07:01,995 --> 00:07:05,594
If a Woman tried to compliment me on
my dick-giving abilities, I'd be psyched.

113
00:07:05,803 --> 00:07:07,169
Hey, yo, Seth.

114
00:07:09,444 --> 00:07:10,412
What?

115
00:07:10,613 --> 00:07:13,643
Did you hear I'm having
a big grad party next Saturday?

116
00:07:15,591 --> 00:07:17,025
- No.
- Yeah.

117
00:07:18,230 --> 00:07:20,598
- Oh, shit!
- You're not coming.

118
00:07:21,269 --> 00:07:24,504
Tell your fucking faggot friend
he can't come either.

119
00:07:29,153 --> 00:07:30,850
So Jesse Wanted me to tell you...

120
00:07:31,056 --> 00:07:33,425
...you're a fucking faggot
and can't come to his party.

121
00:07:33,629 --> 00:07:35,496
You really bitched out
back there, man.

122
00:07:35,699 --> 00:07:37,032
I bitched out?

123
00:07:37,236 --> 00:07:40,003
You bitched out, man,
you fucking Judas.

124
00:07:40,209 --> 00:07:41,405
You fucking left me hanging.

125
00:07:41,612 --> 00:07:43,605
Did you Want me to dive
in front of his spit?

126
00:07:46,657 --> 00:07:48,752
Come on, guys, let's go!

127
00:08:03,759 --> 00:08:05,285
This is bullshit.

128
00:08:05,496 --> 00:08:07,625
Pussy.

129
00:08:08,169 --> 00:08:11,802
If I equals the square root
of negative one...

130
00:08:12,010 --> 00:08:17,580
...then I squared equals
negative one. Okay?

131
00:08:17,789 --> 00:08:20,021
In other Words,
if you consider I as a constant...

132
00:08:20,227 --> 00:08:23,998
...you can then define the square roots
of all the negative numbers.

133
00:08:24,436 --> 00:08:28,878
So I is an imaginary number.
It doesn't really exist.

134
00:08:29,079 --> 00:08:32,143
If I equals the square root
of negative one...

135
00:08:32,353 --> 00:08:34,346
...then I squared equals
negative one.

136
00:08:34,558 --> 00:08:37,223
Is this making s...? Okay.

137
00:08:43,844 --> 00:08:45,143
- Okay, bye.
- Evan!

138
00:08:45,682 --> 00:08:47,151
- Evan, hey.
- Hey, Becca.

139
00:08:47,352 --> 00:08:48,946
- Hey, thank you for your pen.
- Hey.

140
00:08:49,156 --> 00:08:51,787
No problem. No, no, don't Worry.
No Worries. You keep it.

141
00:08:51,995 --> 00:08:55,560
You Won't have to borroW one again
because you'll have that one.

142
00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:59,642
- Thank you so much, that's...
- You're Welcome. Don't Worry about it.

143
00:08:59,845 --> 00:09:01,474
So I Was gonna ask you...

144
00:09:01,682 --> 00:09:04,176
...did you hear about
Jesse's grad party next Weekend?

145
00:09:04,388 --> 00:09:07,953
- It should be fun.
- I heard. L... It's a maybe.

146
00:09:08,162 --> 00:09:09,654
- Really?
- For me at the moment.

147
00:09:10,167 --> 00:09:11,396
- My R.S.V.P.
- Just a maybe?

148
00:09:11,603 --> 00:09:12,571
So far.

149
00:09:12,773 --> 00:09:15,438
There's so much other fun shit
that's gonna be happening...

150
00:09:15,645 --> 00:09:18,674
...that I can't really commit and,
you knoW, hurt someone's feelings.

151
00:09:18,885 --> 00:09:21,949
Fun shit? But I never see you
at parties or anything.

152
00:09:22,827 --> 00:09:25,628
That's because of
all the other fun shit I'm off doing.

153
00:09:25,833 --> 00:09:27,564
I'd love to be at all of them, but...

154
00:09:27,771 --> 00:09:29,605
Why Weren't you
at Dimitri's on Saturday?

155
00:09:29,809 --> 00:09:31,300
There Was so many things
going on.

156
00:09:31,513 --> 00:09:33,608
I couldn't find a minute
to make an appearance.

157
00:09:33,817 --> 00:09:37,257
- What did you do?
- Saturday Was a crazy night for me.

158
00:09:40,331 --> 00:09:42,267
<i>I had some friends over,</i>
<i>we had a few drinks.</i>

159
00:09:42,469 --> 00:09:44,302
<i>That's Vag-tastic!</i>

160
00:09:44,506 --> 00:09:47,239
<i>I hung out in my basement,</i>
<i>the chill zone, where we chill-lax.</i>

161
00:09:47,447 --> 00:09:50,078
<i>Like "relax" and "chill"</i>
<i>all at once.</i>

162
00:09:51,188 --> 00:09:52,679
Seth's parents
Were throWing a party.

163
00:09:52,891 --> 00:09:55,829
<i>We got to hang around adults,</i>
<i>which was a nice change of pace.</i>

164
00:09:56,031 --> 00:09:59,471
<i>You converse, you talk to people</i>
<i>and they have interesting stories.</i>

165
00:09:59,672 --> 00:10:03,339
<i>I talked to a man who claimed he had</i>
<i>climbed five mountains in his life.</i>

166
00:10:03,714 --> 00:10:06,983
Then We Went to a nightclub, Which
Was incredible. This big, fancy one.

167
00:10:07,188 --> 00:10:09,955
- Gonna look at tits right noW!
- <i>I'm feeling crazy. I said that.</i>

168
00:10:11,330 --> 00:10:12,629
- <i>You got in?</i>
- <i>We got right in.</i>

169
00:10:12,833 --> 00:10:14,632
- Wanna do this, 'roid monkey?
- Fuck you!

170
00:10:14,837 --> 00:10:18,208
<i>Then we called it a night.</i>
<i>We were all just really exhausted.</i>

171
00:10:18,411 --> 00:10:20,176
What the fuck?!

172
00:10:20,383 --> 00:10:23,617
You Would've loved it. It Was
an incredible, unbelievable night.

173
00:10:23,823 --> 00:10:25,122
That sounds like a lot of fun.

174
00:10:25,326 --> 00:10:28,230
You knoW, I'd love to go
do something like that sometime.

175
00:10:28,433 --> 00:10:30,061
Who Wouldn't? I mean, it Was like...

176
00:10:30,271 --> 00:10:33,471
...me and Seth are
alWays kind of cooking up these...

177
00:10:33,678 --> 00:10:36,309
...fun, sort of,
little, you knoW, events.

178
00:10:36,517 --> 00:10:39,250
I guess you guys are really
gonna go crazy next year together.

179
00:10:39,456 --> 00:10:42,189
We Were going to,
but We got into different schools.

180
00:10:42,396 --> 00:10:44,424
Really? That sucks.

181
00:10:44,834 --> 00:10:47,864
Yeah, I mean, it's not too bad.
I mean, it should be okay.

182
00:10:48,075 --> 00:10:49,635
Not too Worried about it, really.

183
00:10:49,845 --> 00:10:52,442
Don't Worry about it.
I'm not Worried at all.

184
00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:57,560
- All right, Well, thank you for the pen.
- Yeah. No problem.

185
00:10:57,762 --> 00:11:00,632
- Bye.
- Bye.

186
00:11:00,835 --> 00:11:03,102
Bye, Evan.

187
00:11:12,159 --> 00:11:15,496
Mrs. HayWorth, I joined this class
because I'd be cooking With a partner.

188
00:11:15,700 --> 00:11:19,265
But she's never here, and I don't get
tWice the grades for doing all the Work.

189
00:11:19,475 --> 00:11:21,536
I didn't invent odd numbers, Seth.

190
00:11:21,747 --> 00:11:24,776
I knoW, but look at Evan, okay?
Just look at him.

191
00:11:24,986 --> 00:11:28,448
Don't keep me Waiting much longer.
I'm getting impatient up here.

192
00:11:28,661 --> 00:11:31,463
You knoW What I'm talking about.
Miroki, you're embarrassing me.

193
00:11:31,668 --> 00:11:35,073
I'm here in my unit, isolated and alone,
eating my terrible-tasting food...

194
00:11:35,275 --> 00:11:36,743
...and I gotta look over at that.

195
00:11:36,945 --> 00:11:39,142
Looks like the most fun
I've ever seen in my life.

196
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:42,482
And it's B.S. Excuse my language.
I'm just saying that I Wash and dry.

197
00:11:42,691 --> 00:11:43,818
I'm like a single mother.

198
00:11:44,027 --> 00:11:45,997
We all knoW Home Ec is a joke,
no offense.

199
00:11:46,198 --> 00:11:49,603
Everyone takes this class to get an A.
It's bullshit, and I'm sorry.

200
00:11:49,806 --> 00:11:52,744
I'm not putting doWn your profession,
but it's just the Way I feel.

201
00:11:52,946 --> 00:11:55,246
I don't Wanna sit here alone
cooking this shitty food.

202
00:11:55,452 --> 00:11:59,415
No offense. And I just think
that I don't ever need to cook tiramisu.

203
00:11:59,626 --> 00:12:01,357
When am I gonna need
to cook tiramisu?

204
00:12:01,564 --> 00:12:02,931
Am I gonna be a chef? No.

205
00:12:03,134 --> 00:12:06,130
There's three Weeks left in school.
Give me a fucking break.

206
00:12:06,341 --> 00:12:08,504
I'm sorry for cursing.

207
00:12:09,715 --> 00:12:12,015
All right, Jules' partner isn't here
today either.

208
00:12:12,220 --> 00:12:13,655
Pair up With her. Station four.

209
00:12:14,391 --> 00:12:15,985
Jules?

210
00:12:17,264 --> 00:12:19,063
All right. I'll give it another shot.

211
00:12:19,268 --> 00:12:21,262
I'll give Home Ec another shot.

212
00:12:30,893 --> 00:12:33,091
Hey, Jules.
Your partner didn't come today?

213
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,833
- That's kind of a personal question.
- What?

214
00:12:36,472 --> 00:12:39,501
Nothing. It's my attempt at humor.
I Was just...

215
00:12:39,812 --> 00:12:41,509
Oh, like coming.

216
00:12:41,716 --> 00:12:43,777
Like "coming" coming.

217
00:12:45,357 --> 00:12:48,329
WoW, that Was a little too far
right there. The gesture.

218
00:12:48,530 --> 00:12:51,434
Yeah. It's pretty far.
Shit, I do that...

219
00:12:51,637 --> 00:12:54,005
No, don't Worry.
I'm actually used to it.

220
00:12:54,210 --> 00:12:56,807
My older brother says, like,
the nastiest shit.

221
00:12:57,015 --> 00:12:59,144
Like he called me "hymen"
until I Was 12.

222
00:12:59,921 --> 00:13:01,891
- That's sick. That's not even clever.
- I knoW.

223
00:13:02,092 --> 00:13:03,061
I knoW.

224
00:13:03,262 --> 00:13:05,825
I Would've gone With something
at least mildly entertaining.

225
00:13:06,034 --> 00:13:08,437
You knoW, like... Like...
Like "family Jules."

226
00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:13,048
Or like "nuts." Yeah, that's funny.
That's a fucking funny joke.

227
00:13:13,483 --> 00:13:15,453
Fucking funny.

228
00:13:16,055 --> 00:13:19,027
- I can't believe that.
- So, all right. We gotta...

229
00:13:19,229 --> 00:13:20,197
...mix it up.

230
00:13:56,107 --> 00:14:00,481
Yeah, HayWorth Will notice this,
if We cover it With chocolate.

231
00:14:00,884 --> 00:14:02,979
- The Whole thing?
- Just dump it on. I'm serious.

232
00:14:03,189 --> 00:14:04,214
Okay.

233
00:14:05,026 --> 00:14:07,896
- And noW it looks professional.
- That's really impressive.

234
00:14:08,100 --> 00:14:10,536
- It's beautifully done.
- I think We're gonna get an A.

235
00:14:13,076 --> 00:14:15,138
So, What are you doing tonight?

236
00:14:15,482 --> 00:14:17,213
- Probably nothing. Why?
- I don't knoW.

237
00:14:17,419 --> 00:14:19,412
My parents are gone
so I'm having a party.

238
00:14:19,624 --> 00:14:22,221
I don't really knoW hoW many people
are gonna be there...

239
00:14:22,430 --> 00:14:24,696
...but you could stop by
if you Wanted to.

240
00:14:25,269 --> 00:14:27,398
Yeah, I love parties.

241
00:14:27,841 --> 00:14:29,435
Really?

242
00:14:29,812 --> 00:14:32,147
I just don't really ever
see you at them.

243
00:14:32,351 --> 00:14:34,048
You knoW, it's a love-hate thing.

244
00:14:34,255 --> 00:14:37,592
So, like, you knoW, right noW,
I really love them, though.

245
00:14:38,397 --> 00:14:41,267
- Yeah.
- Good shit, right, Miroki?

246
00:14:41,670 --> 00:14:42,764
Yeah.

247
00:14:42,973 --> 00:14:45,604
Hey, Miroki, could We have
a minute alone? Just... Thanks.

248
00:14:45,813 --> 00:14:48,376
Dude, Jules is having
a fucking party.

249
00:14:48,585 --> 00:14:49,952
Hey!

250
00:14:50,355 --> 00:14:53,624
- Don't tell Fogell about the party.
- Gangsters. What's up, guys?

251
00:14:54,130 --> 00:14:57,160
I Was just Walking doWn the hall
and Nicola Was right in front of me.

252
00:14:57,370 --> 00:15:00,308
She's Wearing these tight White pants
With this black G-string...

253
00:15:00,511 --> 00:15:03,540
...and you could see right
through the pants. It Was so sWeet.

254
00:15:13,705 --> 00:15:16,074
It's 10:33.

255
00:15:18,482 --> 00:15:19,950
What?

256
00:15:22,023 --> 00:15:23,286
I told her What time it Was.

257
00:15:23,492 --> 00:15:26,431
That's the coolest fucking story
I've ever heard in my entire life.

258
00:15:26,633 --> 00:15:29,196
- Can I hear it again? You have time?
- Yeah, yeah, Seth.

259
00:15:29,405 --> 00:15:32,206
I'll miss your knee-slappers
When me and Evan are at Dartmouth.

260
00:15:32,411 --> 00:15:34,507
While you guys are at Dartmouth,
I'll be at State...

261
00:15:34,716 --> 00:15:37,814
...Where the girls are half as smart
and tWice as likely to fellash me.

262
00:15:38,024 --> 00:15:40,426
What are you guys doing tonight?
Asshole.

263
00:15:40,629 --> 00:15:42,826
We got nothing.
Nothing tonight, Fogell.

264
00:15:43,034 --> 00:15:45,905
No? Well, if nothing comes up,
We can get shitfaced again, yeah?

265
00:15:46,107 --> 00:15:48,840
You're alWays calling me a pussy,
but today you're Wrong.

266
00:15:49,047 --> 00:15:51,484
At lunch, I'm going to the same place
Mike Snider Went...

267
00:15:51,686 --> 00:15:54,055
...to pick up my brand-neW fake ID.

268
00:15:54,926 --> 00:15:58,366
Yeah. Fake ID. Fake ID. I'm tight.

269
00:15:58,567 --> 00:16:01,004
That's insane. Evan Was like,
"I heard about this party.

270
00:16:01,206 --> 00:16:04,144
We shouldn't tell Fogell."
I Was like, "No, We should tell Fogell."

271
00:16:04,346 --> 00:16:06,476
You could buy us booze noW.
It's aWesome.

272
00:16:06,684 --> 00:16:10,146
Yeah, I'll... Sure, I'll buy the booze.
Yeah, We're gonna get our drinks on.

273
00:16:10,359 --> 00:16:12,853
We're gonna party
and get crunk and rock out, dude.

274
00:16:13,064 --> 00:16:15,126
If you're not in this class,
leave this class.

275
00:16:15,336 --> 00:16:17,499
Fogell! Hi.

276
00:16:17,707 --> 00:16:18,767
Okay. Gotta go.

277
00:16:18,977 --> 00:16:20,970
Well done. Seriously.
See you after class.

278
00:16:21,549 --> 00:16:23,314
You tell that idiot
you're not rooming With him?

279
00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:24,488
Not yet. No.

280
00:16:24,689 --> 00:16:27,422
All right, Well, you better.
That guy's the fucking anti-poon.

281
00:16:27,629 --> 00:16:29,565
Seth, it's dishes time.
What's the holdup?

282
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:32,028
We're getting a fake ID, so...

283
00:16:32,239 --> 00:16:35,006
- It's not like a big deal.
- WoW, that's cool.

284
00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:37,340
But you guys have, like,
four more years to go...

285
00:16:37,550 --> 00:16:38,950
...so do you Wanna get to Work?

286
00:16:39,154 --> 00:16:41,522
Well, We got into
different schools, so...

287
00:16:41,725 --> 00:16:43,821
So you're cutting the cord?
What's gonna happen?

288
00:16:44,030 --> 00:16:46,593
Nothing. Jeez, What does
everybody think is gonna happen?

289
00:16:46,803 --> 00:16:49,639
The World's gonna explode if We
don't spend every second together?

290
00:16:49,843 --> 00:16:52,211
I mean, We're not dependent
on each other, you knoW.

291
00:16:52,414 --> 00:16:54,817
We met When We Were 8.
We Were fine before then.

292
00:16:55,020 --> 00:16:57,822
I Was. I mean, it's like,
We don't do everything together.

293
00:16:58,027 --> 00:16:59,724
No. All right, I gotta take a piss.

294
00:16:59,931 --> 00:17:02,562
My dick's not gonna shake itself.
Come on, babe.

295
00:17:04,807 --> 00:17:07,540
- He's a crack-up.
- I'm just gonna go.

296
00:17:10,353 --> 00:17:12,721
Well, at least
We're getting a graduation party.

297
00:17:12,925 --> 00:17:14,052
Thank God, man.

298
00:17:14,261 --> 00:17:16,128
I'm excited.

299
00:17:16,332 --> 00:17:19,794
I Would do terrible, disgusting things
to hook up With Jules.

300
00:17:20,006 --> 00:17:21,771
- Unforgivable things.
- I hear you, man.

301
00:17:21,978 --> 00:17:24,107
I'd give my middle nut
to start dating Becca.

302
00:17:24,315 --> 00:17:26,217
Becca's a bitch.

303
00:17:26,421 --> 00:17:29,052
You knoW What? I'm seriously
getting fucking sick of you...

304
00:17:29,260 --> 00:17:31,697
...talking about her like that,
if We can be honest.

305
00:17:31,899 --> 00:17:33,528
- Me too.
- Why do you hate her so much?

306
00:17:33,736 --> 00:17:36,139
You've never given me a reason.
I think you like her.

307
00:17:36,542 --> 00:17:39,640
- Fuck no, man! I hate Becca.
- Why, man?

308
00:17:39,849 --> 00:17:42,320
Fine, Evan. Here it comes.

309
00:17:42,521 --> 00:17:45,322
When I Was a little kid,
I kind of had this problem.

310
00:17:45,527 --> 00:17:47,156
And it's not even that big of a deal.

311
00:17:47,364 --> 00:17:50,097
Something like 8 percent of kids
do it, but Whatever. It's...

312
00:17:50,305 --> 00:17:56,740
For some reason, I don't knoW Why,
I Would just kind of sit around all day...

313
00:17:58,489 --> 00:18:00,288
...and draW pictures of dicks.

314
00:18:02,363 --> 00:18:03,422
What?

315
00:18:03,933 --> 00:18:06,062
DraW pictures of dicks.

316
00:18:06,405 --> 00:18:07,805
Dicks?

317
00:18:08,008 --> 00:18:09,807
Like a man dick?

318
00:18:10,347 --> 00:18:12,317
Yeah. Like a man dick.

319
00:18:15,123 --> 00:18:18,392
<i>I'd sit there for hours, drawing dicks.</i>
<i>I don't know what it was.</i>

320
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:22,368
<i>I couldn't touch the pen to paper</i>
<i>without drawing the shape of a penis.</i>

321
00:18:22,573 --> 00:18:24,839
- <i>That's fucked.</i>
- <i>No shit, it's really fucked up.</i>

322
00:18:25,045 --> 00:18:26,308
<i>Here I am, this little kid...</i>

323
00:18:26,514 --> 00:18:29,453
<i>... and I can't stop drawing dicks</i>
<i>to save my own life.</i>

324
00:18:38,540 --> 00:18:41,273
All right. I mean, I don't see
What this has to do With Becca.

325
00:18:41,479 --> 00:18:43,848
Just listen. Okay?

326
00:18:44,052 --> 00:18:47,219
<i>Your precious little Becca</i>
<i>sat next to me for all of fourth grade.</i>

327
00:18:47,926 --> 00:18:51,559
<i>And in the classroom is where</i>
<i>I did the majority of my illustrations.</i>

328
00:18:52,402 --> 00:18:55,603
<i>I was very secretive about this</i>
<i>whole dick operation I had going on.</i>

329
00:18:55,810 --> 00:18:57,370
<i>Even I thought I was fucking crazy.</i>

330
00:18:57,580 --> 00:18:59,243
<i>Imagine what everyone else</i>
<i>would think.</i>

331
00:18:59,451 --> 00:19:01,422
<i>So I would stash</i>
<i>all of my dick drawings...</i>

332
00:19:01,623 --> 00:19:04,493
<i>... in this</i> Ghostbusters <i>lunchbox</i>
<i>that I had.</i>

333
00:19:04,695 --> 00:19:08,898
<i>So one day I'm finishing up this</i>
<i>real big, veiny, triumphant bastard.</i>

334
00:19:09,105 --> 00:19:10,198
<i>All of a sudden...

335
00:19:10,408 --> 00:19:12,139
Pussy!

336
00:19:14,583 --> 00:19:16,519
You hit Becca's foot With your dick?

337
00:19:16,721 --> 00:19:19,454
Yeah. I knoW.

338
00:19:34,993 --> 00:19:35,961
Oh, my God!

339
00:19:36,296 --> 00:19:40,430
<i>She starts crying. She flips out.</i>
<i>And she rats me out to the principal.</i>

340
00:19:40,639 --> 00:19:43,132
<i>He finds this</i> Ghostbusters <i>lunchbox</i>
<i>dick treasure chest...</i>

341
00:19:43,344 --> 00:19:44,744
<i>... and he fucking flips out.</i>

342
00:19:54,167 --> 00:19:57,607
<i>He calls in my parents. Turns out this</i>
<i>principal is some religious fanatic...</i>

343
00:19:57,808 --> 00:19:59,971
<i>... and he thinks I'm possessed</i>
<i>by some dick devil.</i>

344
00:20:00,180 --> 00:20:03,619
<i>My parents make me see a therapist,</i>
<i>and he's asking me dick questions.</i>

345
00:20:03,821 --> 00:20:06,053
<i>They made me stop eating foods</i>
<i>shaped like dicks.</i>

346
00:20:06,259 --> 00:20:07,888
<i>No hot dogs, no Popsicles.</i>

347
00:20:08,096 --> 00:20:10,967
You knoW hoW many foods are
shaped like dicks? The best kinds.

348
00:20:11,170 --> 00:20:12,605
Yeah.

349
00:20:13,407 --> 00:20:16,346
Well, I don't...
That's really messed up.

350
00:20:17,250 --> 00:20:19,379
- Super gay.
- All right, let's stop this madness.

351
00:20:19,587 --> 00:20:22,822
- Let's just go get some dessert.
- I can't, I gotta go meet my counselor.

352
00:20:23,028 --> 00:20:25,329
I'm picking out my classes
for next year.

353
00:20:26,335 --> 00:20:30,401
So I gotta sit and eat dessert alone,
like I'm fucking Steven Glanzberg?

354
00:20:31,145 --> 00:20:33,548
I gue... Yeah, I mean,
What do you Want me to do?

355
00:20:34,619 --> 00:20:36,681
I don't knoW. Nothing. It's fine.

356
00:20:37,358 --> 00:20:41,129
- Just relax, man. I'll see you later.
- That's fine. I'll be fine.

357
00:20:48,449 --> 00:20:50,419
Hey, pussy.

358
00:20:50,620 --> 00:20:52,487
Fuck off.

359
00:20:52,692 --> 00:20:54,389
Just the one. Just the one. Not both.

360
00:20:54,596 --> 00:20:56,225
- So I'll call Andy and Greg.
- Okay.

361
00:20:56,433 --> 00:20:58,904
And I'll bring the '80s dance music.

362
00:20:59,105 --> 00:21:00,699
- Yeah, yeah.
- Right on.

363
00:21:00,909 --> 00:21:03,346
Seth! Hi. There you are.
We Were just talking about you.

364
00:21:03,548 --> 00:21:05,745
- Here I am.
- That's Weird.

365
00:21:05,953 --> 00:21:08,686
So you're coming to my party tonight?
Because it's fully on.

366
00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:11,956
Yeah, Why? Should I not come?
Because I could think of other shit...

367
00:21:12,166 --> 00:21:14,659
Oh, no. No.
I Want you to come, I just...

368
00:21:14,872 --> 00:21:18,106
You said something earlier about,
like, a fake ID or something, right?

369
00:21:18,312 --> 00:21:20,875
Yeah, I'm gonna get one.
For sure, for sure.

370
00:21:21,085 --> 00:21:23,818
I'm getting that for sure.

371
00:21:24,693 --> 00:21:26,560
Can you get us booze?

372
00:21:29,001 --> 00:21:31,336
Yeah. I can.
I can get you guys alcohol.

373
00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:33,066
- Really? Seriously?
- Yes, for sure.

374
00:21:33,277 --> 00:21:34,837
That Would be aWesome.
Thank you.

375
00:21:35,048 --> 00:21:37,519
Because We Were Worried about that.
That Would be great.

376
00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:40,385
Plus, you knoW, you scratch
our backs, We'll scratch yours.

377
00:21:40,592 --> 00:21:42,620
Well, Jules, the funny thing
about my back...

378
00:21:42,831 --> 00:21:45,325
...is that it's located on my cock.

379
00:21:47,875 --> 00:21:49,845
So you do Want alcohol?
You Want some or no?

380
00:21:50,046 --> 00:21:52,244
You do or you don't?
You do Want alcohol.

381
00:21:52,452 --> 00:21:53,784
- Yeah.
- Either Way.

382
00:21:53,989 --> 00:21:55,982
- Well...
- Either Way. Either Way's fine.

383
00:21:56,193 --> 00:21:57,924
This is actually kind of a big favor.

384
00:21:58,130 --> 00:22:02,071
Because my parents left me like
100 bucks to feed myself for the Week.

385
00:22:02,272 --> 00:22:05,472
But the house is full of food,
so I just thought I'd spend it all...

386
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:08,481
...on, you knoW,
extra drinks for the party, so...

387
00:22:08,686 --> 00:22:11,818
That's really nice. I don't think
I've ever done anything that nice.

388
00:22:12,027 --> 00:22:13,553
- It's cool?
- Yeah.

389
00:22:13,764 --> 00:22:14,925
- Okay. Thank you.
- AWesome.

390
00:22:15,133 --> 00:22:18,106
I mean, seriously, that's really...
That's nice of you. Thank you.

391
00:22:18,306 --> 00:22:21,939
So should I just get a shitload
of different shit?

392
00:22:22,783 --> 00:22:25,084
Well, you gotta get me
some Kyle's Killer Lemonade.

393
00:22:25,288 --> 00:22:28,522
Kyle's Killer Lemonade. That's kind of
gay, but I can get it for you.

394
00:22:29,063 --> 00:22:31,967
So... Okay, so then
We Will see you tonight.

395
00:22:32,169 --> 00:22:33,000
Go to the ball, guys.

396
00:22:33,772 --> 00:22:35,936
Evan. Get into the game.

397
00:22:36,511 --> 00:22:38,414
Kick it over to me.

398
00:22:38,616 --> 00:22:40,677
Seth! Get off the field!

399
00:22:40,887 --> 00:22:43,051
Get out of here.
They're gonna make me run laps.

400
00:22:43,259 --> 00:22:44,454
Just fucking listen, okay?

401
00:22:44,663 --> 00:22:48,124
Jules and her stupid fucking friend
asked me to buy her alcohol.

402
00:22:48,337 --> 00:22:51,275
But not just her, for her Whole party.
You knoW What that means?

403
00:22:51,477 --> 00:22:54,644
By some miracle, We Were paired up
and she actually thought of me.

404
00:22:54,851 --> 00:22:57,550
Thought of me enough to decide
I Was the guy she Would trust...

405
00:22:57,756 --> 00:23:00,557
...With the Whole fun-ness of her party.
She Wants to fuck me.

406
00:23:00,763 --> 00:23:03,599
She Wants my dick
in or around her mouth.

407
00:23:03,803 --> 00:23:06,570
Did you think that maybe
she's using you to get her alcohol?

408
00:23:06,775 --> 00:23:09,303
- She doesn't Want your dick.
- Of course I thought of that.

409
00:23:09,515 --> 00:23:11,509
The first thing that came
to my mind. Listen.

410
00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:13,815
My older brother alWays says
the nastiest shit.

411
00:23:14,025 --> 00:23:16,495
Like he called me "hymen"
until I Was 12.

412
00:23:16,697 --> 00:23:18,188
Seth, I Wanna bloW you.

413
00:23:19,068 --> 00:23:20,332
She didn't say that. Come on.

414
00:23:20,539 --> 00:23:22,372
She didn't say the second part,
the first...

415
00:23:22,576 --> 00:23:24,979
She's got an older brother.
She could have asked him.

416
00:23:25,182 --> 00:23:26,776
She looked me in the eyes and said:

417
00:23:26,985 --> 00:23:30,720
"Seth, Mom is making a pubie salad.
I need some Seth's OWn dressing."

418
00:23:30,928 --> 00:23:33,296
She's D.T.F.
She's doWn to fuck, man.

419
00:23:33,499 --> 00:23:36,164
P in vagi.
She Wants to fuck, man.

420
00:23:36,372 --> 00:23:39,037
Tonight is the night
that fucking is an actual possibility.

421
00:23:39,245 --> 00:23:41,876
You sound like an idiot.
You're not gonna sleep With her.

422
00:23:42,084 --> 00:23:45,353
No. Dude, I knoW
I talk a lot of shit, okay?

423
00:23:45,558 --> 00:23:48,155
But she's gonna be at the party
and she's gonna be drunk.

424
00:23:48,364 --> 00:23:51,769
She likes me at least a little.
At the very least, I'll make out With her.

425
00:23:51,972 --> 00:23:53,965
TWo Weeks, handjob.
Month, bloWjob. Whatever.

426
00:23:54,177 --> 00:23:55,736
And then I make her my girlfriend.

427
00:23:55,947 --> 00:23:57,917
And I've got, like,
tWo solid months of sex.

428
00:23:58,118 --> 00:23:59,712
By the time college rolls around...

429
00:23:59,922 --> 00:24:02,189
...l'll be like the Iron Chef
of pounding vag.

430
00:24:02,394 --> 00:24:03,692
Can We talk about this later?

431
00:24:03,897 --> 00:24:05,833
What the fuck, Evan?
We're doWn tWo points.

432
00:24:06,035 --> 00:24:07,868
Fucking calm doWn, Greg.
It's soccer.

433
00:24:08,072 --> 00:24:09,666
- It's soccer.
- Fuck you, man.

434
00:24:09,876 --> 00:24:12,109
Hey, Greg, Why don't you go
piss your pants again?

435
00:24:12,315 --> 00:24:14,843
- That Was eight years ago, asshole.
- People don't forget.

436
00:24:15,054 --> 00:24:17,115
Do you Wanna hear the best part?
Becca.

437
00:24:17,326 --> 00:24:19,125
You do the same thing With her.

438
00:24:19,330 --> 00:24:21,425
When you guys are shitfaced,
you get With her.

439
00:24:21,635 --> 00:24:24,402
This is our last party
as high school people.

440
00:24:24,608 --> 00:24:27,478
I've ignored my hatred for Becca
in coming up With this plan.

441
00:24:27,681 --> 00:24:30,448
I'm flexing nuts. Just fucking
come With me on this voyage...

442
00:24:30,654 --> 00:24:32,213
...and stop being a pussy
for once...

443
00:24:32,425 --> 00:24:35,454
...and We can fucking
fuck some girls already.

444
00:24:36,066 --> 00:24:38,366
- I should buy Becca alcohol?
- Yeah, it'll be pimp.

445
00:24:38,571 --> 00:24:41,441
That Way you knoW she'll be drunk.
You knoW When girls say:

446
00:24:41,644 --> 00:24:44,811
"I Was so shitfaced last night.
I shouldn't have fucked that guy."

447
00:24:45,018 --> 00:24:46,384
We could be that mistake!

448
00:24:48,692 --> 00:24:49,955
Have you talked to Fogell?

449
00:24:50,162 --> 00:24:53,066
All right, you talk to Becca.
I'll talk to that retard, Fogell.

450
00:24:53,268 --> 00:24:54,236
Don't Worry.

451
00:24:54,437 --> 00:24:57,376
- Seth, get off the field!
- Goal.

452
00:24:57,578 --> 00:24:59,309
- You're getting that!
- No, I'm not!

453
00:25:03,289 --> 00:25:05,157
Hey, Becca. Hey, hold up.

454
00:25:05,361 --> 00:25:06,329
- Oh, hey.
- Hey.

455
00:25:06,530 --> 00:25:08,933
Hi. Did you hear
about the party tonight?

456
00:25:09,136 --> 00:25:11,106
Yeah. Yeah, I just heard.
It sounds aWesome.

457
00:25:11,306 --> 00:25:13,277
Yeah. Yeah, I'm going.

458
00:25:13,478 --> 00:25:14,810
- Really?
- Yeah, I'm gonna go.

459
00:25:15,015 --> 00:25:16,574
That's Why I came looking for you.

460
00:25:16,786 --> 00:25:18,949
Me and the guys are gonna
go to a liquor store.

461
00:25:19,157 --> 00:25:20,683
And I just thought, you knoW...

462
00:25:20,894 --> 00:25:23,559
...if you needed someone
to get you yours, I could do that.

463
00:25:23,766 --> 00:25:25,292
I could be that person.

464
00:25:25,503 --> 00:25:26,733
Yeah.

465
00:25:26,940 --> 00:25:28,432
Yeah, no, that Would be great.

466
00:25:28,644 --> 00:25:31,981
That Would save me such a hassle,
because I Was gonna beg my sister.

467
00:25:32,185 --> 00:25:34,554
Could you get me, like,
a bottle of Goldslick Vodka?

468
00:25:34,757 --> 00:25:37,354
Yeah. That's the one
With the little golden flakes in it?

469
00:25:37,563 --> 00:25:40,228
- Yeah. The girly one.
- That's classy.

470
00:25:40,435 --> 00:25:42,166
Well, I'll pay you back at the party.

471
00:25:42,372 --> 00:25:44,103
No, you Won't.
No, it's my treat, miss.

472
00:25:44,311 --> 00:25:45,574
- Really?
- Yep. That's that.

473
00:25:45,780 --> 00:25:48,650
It's the first of many too,
so get used to it, sister.

474
00:25:48,854 --> 00:25:51,051
Well, thank you.

475
00:25:51,258 --> 00:25:53,091
Yeah, no problem.

476
00:26:00,077 --> 00:26:02,310
- I'm sorry. It Was an accident.
- It's okay.

477
00:26:02,516 --> 00:26:05,113
I Was gonna give you a nudge...
A punch, the friend thing.

478
00:26:05,321 --> 00:26:06,346
I didn't mean...

479
00:26:06,558 --> 00:26:07,992
- Hey, Becca.
- Hey.

480
00:26:08,194 --> 00:26:09,220
- Hey.
- Gaby.

481
00:26:09,430 --> 00:26:10,625
- What's up, Evan?
- Hey, Gaby.

482
00:26:10,833 --> 00:26:12,666
- We should get to class.
- We're gonna go.

483
00:26:12,871 --> 00:26:14,430
- So I Will see you tonight.
- Okay.

484
00:26:14,642 --> 00:26:16,201
- Really, don't Worry.
- Okay. Sorry.

485
00:26:16,412 --> 00:26:18,473
- Bye.
- Sorry.

486
00:26:18,683 --> 00:26:20,016
Bye.

487
00:26:21,522 --> 00:26:23,151
Sorry.

488
00:26:31,009 --> 00:26:33,412
Where's that sack of shit, Fogell?
He said he'd be here.

489
00:26:33,615 --> 00:26:35,050
I'm here With my thumb up my ass.

490
00:26:35,252 --> 00:26:37,245
I did it, dude.
I even offered to pay for it.

491
00:26:37,456 --> 00:26:39,323
It Was pimp.
I feel like a pimp right noW.

492
00:26:39,528 --> 00:26:42,159
- Like one of those pimps.
- That is fucking pimp.

493
00:26:42,367 --> 00:26:45,533
- That's What I Was afraid of.
- Why didn't I think of that? Shit.

494
00:26:47,812 --> 00:26:49,110
Sh... We're screWed.

495
00:26:49,315 --> 00:26:50,578
- Okay? We're screWed.
- Okay.

496
00:26:50,784 --> 00:26:52,812
This is What We get
for trusting Fogell, okay?

497
00:26:53,023 --> 00:26:55,186
He pussied out.
I knoW he pussied out.

498
00:26:56,631 --> 00:26:57,599
What are you making?

499
00:26:58,134 --> 00:27:02,542
I'm just drilling holes.
The last tWo Weeks. Fuck it.

500
00:27:03,011 --> 00:27:05,505
What do We tell the girls,
We couldn't do the one thing...

501
00:27:05,716 --> 00:27:07,880
...We promised because
We're dickless incompetents?

502
00:27:08,088 --> 00:27:11,185
NoW We're never gonna bone
because of that used tampon, Fogell.

503
00:27:11,395 --> 00:27:15,097
HoW'd he get into Dartmouth?
I don't get it. He's got shit for brains.

504
00:27:15,303 --> 00:27:17,205
All right,
hoW else can We get alcohol?

505
00:27:17,408 --> 00:27:20,141
- Yo, guys! What's up?
- Fogell, Where have you been, man?

506
00:27:20,348 --> 00:27:22,215
You almost gave me
a goddamn heart attack.

507
00:27:22,419 --> 00:27:25,619
- Let me see it. Did you pussy out?
- No, no, man. I got it.

508
00:27:25,826 --> 00:27:27,887
It's flaWless. Check it.

509
00:27:28,097 --> 00:27:29,293
HaWaii?

510
00:27:29,500 --> 00:27:32,131
All right, that's good.
It's hard to trace, I guess.

511
00:27:32,339 --> 00:27:35,710
Wait, you changed your name
to McLovin?

512
00:27:36,247 --> 00:27:38,548
- Yeah.
- McLovin?

513
00:27:39,621 --> 00:27:42,719
What kind of a stupid name is that?
Are you an Irish R & B singer?

514
00:27:42,929 --> 00:27:45,264
They let you pick any name you Want
When you're there.

515
00:27:45,468 --> 00:27:47,062
And you landed on McLovin?

516
00:27:47,271 --> 00:27:49,434
Yeah, it Was betWeen that
or Mohammad.

517
00:27:49,642 --> 00:27:51,806
Why the fuck Would it be
betWeen that or Mohammad?

518
00:27:52,014 --> 00:27:54,007
Why not just pick
a common name?

519
00:27:54,220 --> 00:27:57,351
Mohammad is the most common name
on earth. Read a fucking book.

520
00:27:57,559 --> 00:27:59,358
Have you ever met anyone
named Mohammad?

521
00:27:59,564 --> 00:28:01,363
Have you ever met anyone
named McLovin?

522
00:28:01,568 --> 00:28:03,663
No, that's Why you picked
a dumb fucking name.

523
00:28:03,873 --> 00:28:05,137
- Fuck you.
- Give me that.

524
00:28:05,343 --> 00:28:08,748
All right. You look like a future
pedophile in this picture, number one.

525
00:28:08,950 --> 00:28:12,048
Number tWo, it doesn't even have
a first name. It just says McLovin!

526
00:28:12,258 --> 00:28:13,351
What? One name?

527
00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:16,123
One name? Who are you, Seal?

528
00:28:16,332 --> 00:28:18,633
Fogell, this ID says
you're 25 years old.

529
00:28:18,838 --> 00:28:20,398
Why Wouldn't you just put 21, man?

530
00:28:20,608 --> 00:28:22,636
Seth, Seth, Seth.
Listen up, ass-face.

531
00:28:22,847 --> 00:28:26,343
Every day, hundreds of kids go into
the liquor store With their fake IDs...

532
00:28:26,555 --> 00:28:28,354
...and every single one
says they're 21.

533
00:28:28,559 --> 00:28:30,290
HoW many 21 -year-olds
are in this toWn?

534
00:28:30,496 --> 00:28:31,897
It's called fucking strategy.

535
00:28:32,099 --> 00:28:34,263
Let's stay calm, okay?
Let's not lose our heads.

536
00:28:34,471 --> 00:28:37,602
It's a fine ID. It'll... It's gonna Work.
It's passable, okay?

537
00:28:37,812 --> 00:28:40,339
This isn't terrible.
I mean, it's up to you, Fogell.

538
00:28:40,551 --> 00:28:43,079
This guy's gonna think,
"Here's a kid With a fake ID"...

539
00:28:43,290 --> 00:28:47,527
...or "Here's McLovin, the 25-year-old
HaWaiian organ donor."

540
00:28:47,733 --> 00:28:49,896
Okay? So, What's it gonna be?

541
00:28:50,439 --> 00:28:51,931
I am McLovin.

542
00:28:52,944 --> 00:28:55,609
No, you're not. No one's McLovin.
McLovin's never existed...

543
00:28:55,817 --> 00:28:59,188
...because that's a made-up, dumb,
fucking fairy-tale name, you fuck!

544
00:28:59,391 --> 00:29:01,726
Jeez, man. It'll Work.
Give it a chance.

545
00:29:01,930 --> 00:29:03,296
Did you move my...?

546
00:29:03,500 --> 00:29:04,763
Where is my car?

547
00:29:04,969 --> 00:29:06,370
Oh, my God, man.

548
00:29:06,573 --> 00:29:08,942
What did I say to you?
I told you not to park here.

549
00:29:09,145 --> 00:29:11,548
Why Would you park
in the staff parking lot?

550
00:29:11,751 --> 00:29:13,049
Shut the fuck up, Fogell.

551
00:29:13,253 --> 00:29:15,816
I mean, because you're not staff.

552
00:29:16,027 --> 00:29:19,558
I knoW that, Fagell! I knoW that!

553
00:29:21,972 --> 00:29:23,839
Evan, let's go to your house.

554
00:29:24,979 --> 00:29:27,610
Wait, are you guys
still picking me up from Work?

555
00:29:29,020 --> 00:29:30,614
Can you ansWer me?

556
00:29:34,432 --> 00:29:37,165
Man, don't you have
any non-infant clothes?

557
00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:39,208
- It'll be fine.
- Yeah.

558
00:29:39,409 --> 00:29:41,572
Why don't you just Wear
What you Wore to school?

559
00:29:41,781 --> 00:29:44,844
I can't do that. I can't let Jules
see me in What I Wore to school.

560
00:29:45,054 --> 00:29:46,489
It's completely unbecoming.

561
00:29:46,691 --> 00:29:50,096
No one's gotten a handjob
in cargo shorts since Nam.

562
00:29:50,299 --> 00:29:53,169
I have to kill these guys.
You don't negotiate With terrorists.

563
00:29:53,373 --> 00:29:56,209
Really? Yeah, that's What
We should be talking about right noW.

564
00:29:56,412 --> 00:29:58,883
Then Why don't you go
and get some of your oWn clothes?

565
00:29:59,084 --> 00:30:00,451
That's the dumbest thing ever.

566
00:30:00,654 --> 00:30:03,785
My parents Will see that my car's
been toWed and I'll be grounded.

567
00:30:03,995 --> 00:30:06,124
These fucking terrorists
multiply like bunnies.

568
00:30:06,333 --> 00:30:07,632
Where did I leave the M16?

569
00:30:07,836 --> 00:30:11,241
Do you have any bigger clothes
or do you only shop at babyGap?

570
00:30:11,444 --> 00:30:13,676
Fuck me. I can't...

571
00:30:14,250 --> 00:30:16,483
That's fun.
Why do they make that?

572
00:30:16,688 --> 00:30:19,751
If you can't even Win,
then Why am I fucking playing?

573
00:30:19,962 --> 00:30:21,726
Do you Wanna go see
What my dad has?

574
00:30:45,583 --> 00:30:47,348
<i>What the fuck?</i>

575
00:30:50,894 --> 00:30:51,988
What the hell is that?

576
00:30:52,197 --> 00:30:54,133
It's a fucking vest, dumbass.

577
00:30:54,335 --> 00:30:56,806
- I'm trying to look older.
- You look like Pinocchio.

578
00:30:57,007 --> 00:30:59,501
- It's just a vest.
- They got a lot of booze in there.

579
00:30:59,713 --> 00:31:02,686
If We get it noW, We can get
to the party faster With Jules' shit.

580
00:31:02,887 --> 00:31:05,084
No Way, man. I Work there.
They knoW I'm not 25.

581
00:31:05,291 --> 00:31:07,319
Nobody said anything about you,
dick-mouth.

582
00:31:07,530 --> 00:31:09,557
You really fucked me on this one.

583
00:31:09,768 --> 00:31:11,567
So noW I'm gonna steal the booze.

584
00:31:11,772 --> 00:31:14,539
Don't do this.
I promise you I'll get the liquor later.

585
00:31:14,745 --> 00:31:17,046
Mike Snider's ID alWays Works.
So Will mine, man.

586
00:31:17,250 --> 00:31:20,690
Mike Snider's ID doesn't have
one fucking name on it! Okay?

587
00:31:20,891 --> 00:31:24,490
I thought you Dartmouth guys Would
be smart enough to understand that.

588
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:27,368
NoW Seth's gotta
pick up all the pieces.

589
00:31:27,573 --> 00:31:29,235
He Won't do it. Don't Worry.

590
00:31:29,443 --> 00:31:32,643
I forgot to tell you, my mom said We
can have the TV from the basement...

591
00:31:32,849 --> 00:31:34,546
Shut the fuck up,
he's gonna hear you.

592
00:31:34,754 --> 00:31:36,553
Just be quiet.
Wait until he goes aWay.

593
00:31:36,758 --> 00:31:39,321
You still haven't told him
that We're rooming together?

594
00:31:39,531 --> 00:31:40,966
Fogell, shut the fuck up.

595
00:31:41,168 --> 00:31:43,263
And take off your vest.
You look like Aladdin.

596
00:31:43,472 --> 00:31:46,171
Okay. You got it.

597
00:31:54,930 --> 00:31:56,958
Hope piggy can run.

598
00:32:13,236 --> 00:32:14,728
HoW old are you?

599
00:32:14,939 --> 00:32:16,499
TWenty-tWo.

600
00:32:17,010 --> 00:32:19,641
You certainly are.
That'll be 80 dollars.

601
00:32:20,217 --> 00:32:21,948
Okay.

602
00:32:22,155 --> 00:32:24,456
Thank you kindly. Will that do?

603
00:32:24,660 --> 00:32:26,857
Certainly Will. Thank you, Seth.

604
00:32:27,065 --> 00:32:29,036
Hey, thank you.

605
00:32:39,659 --> 00:32:41,093
You dropped your purse, ma'am.

606
00:32:41,295 --> 00:32:42,730
Would you like some help?

607
00:32:42,932 --> 00:32:45,130
Well, that Would be lovely,
young man.

608
00:32:45,337 --> 00:32:48,434
Would you like me
to buy you alcohol?

609
00:32:48,945 --> 00:32:50,938
That Would be lovely.

610
00:32:51,150 --> 00:32:53,712
- Enjoy your remaining years.
- I Will.

611
00:32:53,922 --> 00:32:57,224
- Enjoy fucking Jules.
- I Will.

612
00:33:15,535 --> 00:33:17,198
Don't do it, kid.

613
00:33:21,381 --> 00:33:23,351
I never had a choice.

614
00:33:31,502 --> 00:33:33,335
You fucking killed her!

615
00:33:34,408 --> 00:33:35,376
No!

616
00:33:45,732 --> 00:33:48,704
Where's all the stolen liquor?
Did you hide it up your butt?

617
00:33:48,905 --> 00:33:51,707
Piss off! I Was gonna do it,
but there Was a security breach.

618
00:33:51,912 --> 00:33:53,141
You never Would've done it.

619
00:33:53,348 --> 00:33:56,583
Let's go to a liquor store
and Watch your stupid ID get rejected.

620
00:33:56,788 --> 00:33:59,225
Wait, I'm gonna go put my vest
back in my locker.

621
00:34:26,352 --> 00:34:27,980
All right. Here We are. This is it.

622
00:34:28,189 --> 00:34:29,487
- You ready? Yeah?
- Yeah.

623
00:34:30,727 --> 00:34:34,098
- Here's the money and the list.
- Change is yours. Keep the change.

624
00:34:34,302 --> 00:34:37,365
- Thank you. What's the list for?
- The alcohol.

625
00:34:37,575 --> 00:34:40,479
We're gonna get alcohol
for the Whole party, okay?

626
00:34:40,682 --> 00:34:43,347
We put a lot of time into this list,
so don't fuck it up.

627
00:34:43,555 --> 00:34:44,523
It's perfect.

628
00:34:44,724 --> 00:34:48,061
Ouzo, bourbon,
spiced rum, Goldslick...

629
00:34:48,264 --> 00:34:50,735
Goldslick Vodka. That's for Becca.
Don't forget that.

630
00:34:51,271 --> 00:34:53,673
Raspberry vodka, Scotch...

631
00:34:53,877 --> 00:34:55,642
And Kyle's Killer Lemonade.
A six-pack.

632
00:34:55,848 --> 00:34:58,752
This is a lot. I don't knoW
if I can get aWay With all this.

633
00:34:58,954 --> 00:35:00,355
What difference does it make?

634
00:35:00,557 --> 00:35:03,928
I don't knoW, man.
I'm, like, really nervous.

635
00:35:04,533 --> 00:35:07,003
- Are you okay?
- No, man. I should have Wore the vest.

636
00:35:07,205 --> 00:35:09,539
- Calm doWn.
- What the fuck are you doing?

637
00:35:09,743 --> 00:35:11,610
What if I go in
and they turn me doWn, man?

638
00:35:11,815 --> 00:35:13,682
Then We're in the same place
We're in noW.

639
00:35:13,886 --> 00:35:15,583
- Who cares?
- It's fucking humiliating!

640
00:35:15,790 --> 00:35:17,589
Everybody sees them
kicking me out.

641
00:35:17,794 --> 00:35:20,892
What if they make me
put the liquor back? I can't do that.

642
00:35:21,101 --> 00:35:23,470
This Whole thing
is bigger than you, Fogell!

643
00:35:23,673 --> 00:35:27,044
So groW a pair of nuts and fucking
Walk in there and buy the alcohol!

644
00:35:27,581 --> 00:35:29,779
What if I don't feel like it
anymore, Seth? What?

645
00:35:29,986 --> 00:35:31,785
Then I'll fucking kill you, okay?

646
00:35:31,990 --> 00:35:33,961
I'll stab you
through your fucking heart.

647
00:35:34,162 --> 00:35:35,654
No, you can do this, man.
Come on.

648
00:35:35,866 --> 00:35:38,736
Killing me Won't get you alcohol.
I'm the one With the fake ID.

649
00:35:38,939 --> 00:35:40,932
Then I'll cut
your dumb fucking face off...

650
00:35:41,144 --> 00:35:44,241
...throW it over mine and get your ID
and buy it my fucking self!

651
00:35:44,450 --> 00:35:47,321
Oh, really? You don't have
the technology or the steady hands...

652
00:35:47,524 --> 00:35:49,494
...to pull off a procedure like that,
so ha!

653
00:35:49,695 --> 00:35:51,187
Peace.

654
00:35:51,833 --> 00:35:54,361
Fogell, just be cool, man.
Get in and get out.

655
00:35:54,572 --> 00:35:55,540
You're the hero.

656
00:35:58,347 --> 00:35:59,816
Sorry.

657
00:36:29,981 --> 00:36:31,609
Is there a problem here, sir?

658
00:36:31,818 --> 00:36:35,154
No. No problem Whatsoever.

659
00:36:38,365 --> 00:36:41,030
Sir, did you do this? On the floor?

660
00:36:41,238 --> 00:36:42,707
No.

661
00:36:42,908 --> 00:36:44,537
And you should really clean this up.

662
00:36:44,745 --> 00:36:46,909
Someone could really
hurt themselves.

663
00:36:48,687 --> 00:36:50,554
Fuck my life.

664
00:36:51,158 --> 00:36:52,593
We're so fucked.
We're so fucked.

665
00:36:52,795 --> 00:36:54,628
This plan's been fucked
since Jump Street.

666
00:36:54,834 --> 00:36:57,430
Okay, just calm doWn.
Just calm doWn, all right?

667
00:36:57,973 --> 00:37:00,706
Hey, so did you bring a condom
for tonight?

668
00:37:00,913 --> 00:37:02,850
You brought a condom With you?

669
00:37:03,051 --> 00:37:04,918
Yeah. I figured
I might as Well, you knoW?

670
00:37:05,122 --> 00:37:07,650
I brought a little bottle
of spermicidal lube too.

671
00:37:10,266 --> 00:37:13,033
You laughed in my face
When I said I'd be having sex tonight.

672
00:37:13,239 --> 00:37:15,540
That doesn't mean
you shouldn't alWays be prepared.

673
00:37:15,744 --> 00:37:18,045
- You didn't even bring a condom?
- No.

674
00:37:18,250 --> 00:37:20,049
No, Evan,
that Wasn't part of the plan.

675
00:37:20,254 --> 00:37:22,281
You did this
Without consulting With me.

676
00:37:22,492 --> 00:37:26,159
We've never discussed, like, any plan,
but you keep saying We have a plan.

677
00:37:26,367 --> 00:37:29,305
I had, like, a general outline.
You knoW?

678
00:37:29,507 --> 00:37:32,308
I Was gonna go doWn on her
for, like, several hours, okay?

679
00:37:32,513 --> 00:37:35,417
She Would love that. She'd be smitten.
She'd go out With that.

680
00:37:35,619 --> 00:37:37,316
Or I dry hump the shit out of her leg.

681
00:37:37,524 --> 00:37:40,553
Well, I just... I don't see the harm
in bringing one little condom.

682
00:37:40,764 --> 00:37:42,894
And one little bottle
of spermicidal lube?

683
00:37:43,103 --> 00:37:45,540
Yeah, one little bottle
of spermicidal lube.

684
00:37:45,742 --> 00:37:48,543
- Evan, that's psycho shit, man.
- No, it's not.

685
00:37:48,748 --> 00:37:50,377
That's, like, Charles Manson shit.

686
00:37:50,585 --> 00:37:53,683
What, do you think Becca's gonna be
psyched that you brought lube?

687
00:37:53,892 --> 00:37:57,297
"Oh, Evan. Thank you for bringing
that lube for my pussy.

688
00:37:57,500 --> 00:38:00,597
I never Would've been able to handle
your fucking 4-inch dick...

689
00:38:00,807 --> 00:38:03,904
...inside my pussy
Without that gigantic bottle of lube."

690
00:38:04,113 --> 00:38:05,742
- Okay, that's... That's enough.
- Fuck.

691
00:38:05,951 --> 00:38:08,581
These girls are 18,
they're not dried-up old ladies.

692
00:38:08,791 --> 00:38:10,784
- They're good to go.
- Then I Won't bring the lube.

693
00:38:10,995 --> 00:38:13,968
Don't make me feel like that.
I thought it Was cool.

694
00:38:14,169 --> 00:38:16,469
- This is a nice kind.
- Let me see that for a second.

695
00:38:16,674 --> 00:38:18,667
- An impressive kind.
- It is kind of cool.

696
00:38:18,878 --> 00:38:20,575
- That's cool.
- Fucking dumbass. Lube?

697
00:38:20,782 --> 00:38:22,149
- That's funny.
- You brought lube?

698
00:38:22,352 --> 00:38:25,587
You oWe me 6 bucks because I'm not
Walking over to get it and it exploded.

699
00:38:27,297 --> 00:38:29,494
Hello, Mindy.

700
00:38:42,228 --> 00:38:44,791
I love that stuff.
Been drinking it for years.

701
00:38:46,203 --> 00:38:50,542
You knoW, I heard they recently
decided to add more hops to it.

702
00:38:54,821 --> 00:38:56,017
Okay.

703
00:38:56,224 --> 00:38:58,718
I'm gonna need to see
some identification.

704
00:39:00,901 --> 00:39:02,200
Really?

705
00:39:02,404 --> 00:39:04,636
Makes me feel young again.
There you go.

706
00:39:07,315 --> 00:39:09,512
Oh, shit, it's Cary Hutchins.

707
00:39:12,192 --> 00:39:14,162
She had the biggest tits
I've ever seen.

708
00:39:14,362 --> 00:39:16,195
I heard she got
breast-reduction surgery.

709
00:39:16,401 --> 00:39:18,064
What? Making your tits smaller?

710
00:39:18,271 --> 00:39:21,334
That's like slapping God
for giving you a gorgeous gift.

711
00:39:21,545 --> 00:39:22,808
She had back problems, man.

712
00:39:23,014 --> 00:39:26,112
And it's not just making them smaller.
They completely reshape them.

713
00:39:26,322 --> 00:39:28,258
They make them
more supple and symmetrical.

714
00:39:29,027 --> 00:39:30,929
I gotta catch a glimpse
of these Warlocks.

715
00:39:31,131 --> 00:39:32,691
Let's make a move.

716
00:39:34,272 --> 00:39:36,105
- She's going around the corner.
- Come on!

717
00:39:42,522 --> 00:39:45,460
Okay. Your total is 96.59.

718
00:39:55,417 --> 00:39:56,680
I don't believe it!

719
00:39:57,621 --> 00:39:59,648
Are you okay, mister?

720
00:40:00,460 --> 00:40:02,590
What the shit Was that?

721
00:40:04,135 --> 00:40:07,165
I don't believe it.
I don't believe it.

722
00:40:08,679 --> 00:40:10,011
I don't believe it.

723
00:40:10,214 --> 00:40:12,583
I don't knoW, man.
I think she looked better before.

724
00:40:12,787 --> 00:40:16,192
But noW that she can jog comfortably,
she's in the best shape she's ever...

725
00:40:19,568 --> 00:40:21,333
What is this? What's that?

726
00:40:24,078 --> 00:40:25,341
Oh, man.

727
00:40:30,591 --> 00:40:32,151
Holy shit, they busted Fogell.

728
00:40:33,263 --> 00:40:35,165
HoW did this happen, Evan?
Fuck, man!

729
00:40:35,369 --> 00:40:36,860
His dad's gonna fucking kill him.

730
00:40:37,071 --> 00:40:38,233
Look, okay?

731
00:40:38,441 --> 00:40:41,846
He assaulted the customer,
grabbed the cash and ran out.

732
00:40:42,049 --> 00:40:43,017
So...

733
00:40:43,218 --> 00:40:44,847
- HoW...?
- HoW...? HoW...? HoW...?

734
00:40:45,055 --> 00:40:48,460
- Say When, height-Wise.
- I'm gonna start up here, tell me When.

735
00:40:48,662 --> 00:40:50,895
- I'll start on the bottom and...
- When.

736
00:40:51,101 --> 00:40:53,128
Whatever 5'10" is,
he Was 5'10".

737
00:40:53,340 --> 00:40:56,005
Ethnically, I mean, did... What...?

738
00:40:57,214 --> 00:41:01,781
I mean, Was he...?
Was he like us, or...?

739
00:41:03,161 --> 00:41:04,459
A Woman?

740
00:41:04,663 --> 00:41:05,689
- Female?
- No.

741
00:41:05,900 --> 00:41:08,394
- Is that What you're asking?
- No, no. Was he...?

742
00:41:08,605 --> 00:41:09,573
- Like...
- What? What?

743
00:41:09,774 --> 00:41:10,742
- African?
- Af... Af...

744
00:41:10,944 --> 00:41:12,469
- Was he African?
- African.

745
00:41:12,680 --> 00:41:14,742
No. He Was American,
and he Was like you.

746
00:41:14,952 --> 00:41:17,822
- He looked just like you.
- He Was JeWish. Okay, JeW.

747
00:41:18,025 --> 00:41:20,519
- It's an odd crime for a JeW.
- They're pretty docile.

748
00:41:20,731 --> 00:41:24,330
Okay, so We have an African JeW
Wearing a hoodie.

749
00:41:24,539 --> 00:41:28,070
No, you don't. No. That's not What
I said. Is that What you heard me say?

750
00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:31,081
I said he looked like you.
Do you look like an African JeW?

751
00:41:31,955 --> 00:41:34,119
- No, I look like a cop.
- Yeah.

752
00:41:35,462 --> 00:41:37,660
He Was Caucasian.

753
00:41:37,868 --> 00:41:39,633
- Caucasian.
- All right.

754
00:41:39,838 --> 00:41:40,806
- Okay.
- Well, touché.

755
00:41:41,007 --> 00:41:43,342
Kind of looked like Eminem.
Does that help you?

756
00:41:43,546 --> 00:41:44,514
- An M&M.
- An M&M.

757
00:41:44,716 --> 00:41:47,415
- So he Was circular...?
- Marshall Mathers. Eminem?

758
00:41:47,622 --> 00:41:50,822
- The rapper, Eminem.
- Did he look like this?

759
00:41:51,363 --> 00:41:53,857
- I'm an amateur. I kind of...
- That looks like an M&M.

760
00:41:54,068 --> 00:41:58,442
Longer face? Bigger nose?
Would you say his mouth Was Wider?

761
00:41:58,645 --> 00:42:00,012
Open? A gap?

762
00:42:00,215 --> 00:42:05,055
Is there another squad car in the area
that could be of further assistance?

763
00:42:05,259 --> 00:42:06,887
I don't seem to be getting any.

764
00:42:07,096 --> 00:42:10,000
Okay, so just Walk me through again
What this guy did.

765
00:42:10,202 --> 00:42:13,266
He... He... He came in, he's Wielding...

766
00:42:13,476 --> 00:42:17,747
He's Wielding something. He hits
this small gentleman in the slacks.

767
00:42:17,953 --> 00:42:20,982
And then he jumps over you,
he feels you up, violates you.

768
00:42:21,193 --> 00:42:22,855
- I did not say that.
- No, he doesn't.

769
00:42:23,064 --> 00:42:26,697
Look, I can't do this. I told you already,
I have an exam tomorroW.

770
00:42:26,905 --> 00:42:30,242
Can you understand that?
I have a goddamn veterinary exam!

771
00:42:31,815 --> 00:42:33,580
Goddamn it. This is bullshit.

772
00:42:33,786 --> 00:42:36,519
This is some bullshit.
I got an exam tomorroW. Forget this.

773
00:42:36,726 --> 00:42:38,593
Well, apparently someone
has an exam.

774
00:42:38,796 --> 00:42:40,459
HoW'd you knoW?

775
00:42:41,335 --> 00:42:42,964
You. You're the one
that got punched?

776
00:42:43,172 --> 00:42:44,801
- Yeah.
- Okay.

777
00:42:45,010 --> 00:42:47,379
First things first.
What is your name?

778
00:42:51,256 --> 00:42:52,987
My name?

779
00:42:53,194 --> 00:42:56,998
It's M... McLov... McLovin.

780
00:42:57,603 --> 00:42:59,072
McLovin?

781
00:42:59,273 --> 00:43:00,640
Yeah.

782
00:43:01,712 --> 00:43:03,204
NoW, What's your first name?

783
00:43:03,416 --> 00:43:04,611
What?

784
00:43:04,819 --> 00:43:06,652
- Your first name?
- My first name?

785
00:43:07,925 --> 00:43:12,594
Technically I don't have a first name,
so don't Worry about my first name.

786
00:43:13,671 --> 00:43:15,834
But We're the police.

787
00:43:16,042 --> 00:43:17,875
We just Wanna get
the story straight.

788
00:43:19,416 --> 00:43:20,577
- Come on.
- Fuck, man.

789
00:43:20,786 --> 00:43:23,188
- Come on!
- He must be so afraid.

790
00:43:23,391 --> 00:43:26,364
I don't believe this bullshit.
I can't believe this is happening!

791
00:43:26,565 --> 00:43:30,061
I didn't knoW you could get arrested
for this shit. We need that liquor.

792
00:43:30,272 --> 00:43:32,903
- Are they gonna take him doWntoWn?
- Fuck Fogell.

793
00:43:33,112 --> 00:43:34,945
He got arrested, okay?
We're on our oWn.

794
00:43:35,150 --> 00:43:36,675
We need a neW Way to get liq...

795
00:43:36,887 --> 00:43:40,486
Fuck! The money, man! Fuck!
HoW much money can you get?

796
00:43:40,695 --> 00:43:42,858
Why are you talking about money?
What about Fogell?

797
00:43:43,067 --> 00:43:46,734
That doesn't matter anymore. I lost
a hundred dollars of Jules' money.

798
00:43:46,941 --> 00:43:50,506
Are We gonna bust him out of jail?
Bake a cake With a fucking file in it?

799
00:43:50,716 --> 00:43:54,782
Fuck Fogell. We need a neW Way to
get liquor, Which is fucking impossible.

800
00:43:54,992 --> 00:43:57,896
All right, you need to calm doWn.
We need to think for a second.

801
00:43:58,098 --> 00:44:00,866
- We need to think this out.
- Fuck thinking, We need to act!

802
00:44:03,209 --> 00:44:04,439
Seth!

803
00:44:04,646 --> 00:44:07,482
- What the fuck happened?
- Just... Just get up. SloWly.

804
00:44:07,685 --> 00:44:10,452
You all right? You okay?

805
00:44:10,659 --> 00:44:13,597
I am so sorry, man. I am so sorry.

806
00:44:13,798 --> 00:44:17,796
I didn't even effing see you at all, man.
Are you okay?

807
00:44:18,007 --> 00:44:21,412
So it's just McLovin?

808
00:44:21,615 --> 00:44:23,175
Yeah.

809
00:44:23,954 --> 00:44:26,151
- That's badass.
- That is badass.

810
00:44:26,358 --> 00:44:27,588
- Really cool.
- A badass name.

811
00:44:27,795 --> 00:44:30,494
- Lot of people With Weird names.
- Chingy. Shakira.

812
00:44:30,701 --> 00:44:32,136
Rafe. Pax.

813
00:44:32,338 --> 00:44:35,470
We arrested a man-lady
Who Was legally named "Fuck."

814
00:44:35,678 --> 00:44:37,545
Think he Was Vietnamese,
it Was With a P-H.

815
00:44:37,749 --> 00:44:39,719
But it's still shocking
to see on a license.

816
00:44:39,921 --> 00:44:43,451
- Okay, and hoW old are you, McLovin?
- Old enough.

817
00:44:44,864 --> 00:44:46,333
Old enough for What?

818
00:44:48,806 --> 00:44:50,708
To party.

819
00:44:55,053 --> 00:44:56,920
Can I see your ID?

820
00:44:57,491 --> 00:44:59,553
Yeah, I think I have it.

821
00:45:24,114 --> 00:45:27,281
- You're an organ donor.
- What?

822
00:45:27,488 --> 00:45:29,185
I didn't Wanna, but my Wife insisted.

823
00:45:29,392 --> 00:45:31,157
I give him shit for it too. All the time.

824
00:45:31,363 --> 00:45:34,393
I say, "It's just like a Woman.
Even after you're dead...

825
00:45:34,603 --> 00:45:37,666
...they Wanna tear your heart out."
- They Wanna tear your...

826
00:45:37,877 --> 00:45:40,644
- I say it Weekly and it's still funny.
- It still makes me laugh.

827
00:45:40,850 --> 00:45:42,285
- Really funny.
- There you go.

828
00:45:42,487 --> 00:45:45,584
I'm sorry, guys.
I don't really have any information.

829
00:45:45,794 --> 00:45:48,356
He just hit me,
and I didn't see What he looked like.

830
00:45:48,566 --> 00:45:50,934
- I don't knoW if I can help you.
- You in a hurry?

831
00:45:51,139 --> 00:45:53,166
Yeah, kind of had to catch that bus.

832
00:45:53,376 --> 00:45:57,077
- Where Were you headed?
- Near 13th and Granville.

833
00:45:57,886 --> 00:46:00,687
- We can take you there.
- Get your information on the Way.

834
00:46:00,893 --> 00:46:03,159
- Why Waste 2 bucks?
- We'll take you. No problem.

835
00:46:03,364 --> 00:46:06,997
Please don't report me, man.
We can figure this out, right?

836
00:46:07,206 --> 00:46:09,803
Why the fuck Wouldn't I report you?
You just hit me.

837
00:46:11,849 --> 00:46:13,842
Because I'll do anything.

838
00:46:14,053 --> 00:46:16,547
Please, okay? Anything.
Like, literally...

839
00:46:16,759 --> 00:46:18,194
...fucking anything.

840
00:46:18,396 --> 00:46:21,995
Name anything. Name it. Name it.

841
00:46:23,073 --> 00:46:25,840
All right, look. Hey, man. All right.

842
00:46:26,046 --> 00:46:27,480
Listen, you can trust me, okay?

843
00:46:28,150 --> 00:46:30,917
I'm gonna be totally honest With you.

844
00:46:32,359 --> 00:46:34,762
I have a Warrant out
for a totally nonviolent crime.

845
00:46:34,965 --> 00:46:38,700
Okay? There. Mercy Street, guys.

846
00:46:38,906 --> 00:46:40,603
I'll be honest With you for a second.

847
00:46:40,810 --> 00:46:43,043
You better get us a shitload of cash
or a shitload of alcohol...

848
00:46:43,249 --> 00:46:44,912
...or you're going to fucking prison.

849
00:46:45,119 --> 00:46:47,215
What are you doing, man?
You don't need to...

850
00:46:47,424 --> 00:46:49,394
No, let's not...
Let's hang on a second here.

851
00:46:49,595 --> 00:46:50,655
- Cough it up.
- Fine.

852
00:46:50,865 --> 00:46:52,698
Don't knoW if We should be
doing anything official.

853
00:46:52,936 --> 00:46:55,840
We're Working together. It's like
<i>Let's Make a Deal.</i> Here We go.

854
00:46:56,744 --> 00:46:58,145
Seven bucks?

855
00:46:58,347 --> 00:47:01,411
Are you fucking serious? This isn't
enough. What are you, a 6-year-old?

856
00:47:01,688 --> 00:47:05,321
- It's all I have, man. It's all I have.
- You better think of something quickly.

857
00:47:05,529 --> 00:47:09,493
- My back! My back. Cops, my back.
- No, no, no. Wait, don't do that.

858
00:47:09,705 --> 00:47:11,971
All right, listen.
I can get you alcohol.

859
00:47:12,177 --> 00:47:14,340
I'm going over to this party
right noW, bro. Okay?

860
00:47:14,548 --> 00:47:18,489
It's got booze, it's got girls.
Booze and girls equals...

861
00:47:18,691 --> 00:47:20,889
I don't knoW. Do you?
I don't knoW. Do you?

862
00:47:21,096 --> 00:47:24,034
- I think you do. Do you?
- Yes. That's a definite yes.

863
00:47:24,236 --> 00:47:25,204
Definite yes, then.

864
00:47:25,405 --> 00:47:27,739
- Give me one sec to talk to him.
- Stay right here.

865
00:47:27,943 --> 00:47:31,246
Yeah, yeah. Do What you gotta do.
Mix it over. I'll be over by the car.

866
00:47:31,451 --> 00:47:34,424
Just talk it out. Hey, I'm a nice guy.

867
00:47:35,226 --> 00:47:37,355
- Come on, it's great.
- What are you thinking?

868
00:47:37,564 --> 00:47:39,033
- What are you doing?
- What?

869
00:47:39,234 --> 00:47:41,637
I lost Jules' money,
Fogell's dead to us noW...

870
00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:43,434
...We don't have any choice.
Let's go.

871
00:47:43,644 --> 00:47:46,616
I don't like this idea. This guy's
fucking creepy, man. Look at him.

872
00:47:46,817 --> 00:47:49,584
What? He looks like a guy.
That's What guys look like.

873
00:47:49,790 --> 00:47:52,421
- What is your problem?
- You guys knoW a guy named Jimmy?

874
00:47:52,629 --> 00:47:54,862
You totally look like his brother.

875
00:47:55,068 --> 00:47:57,505
You totally
look like his brother, man.

876
00:47:57,707 --> 00:47:59,267
You do.

877
00:48:00,981 --> 00:48:02,780
You promised Becca
you'd get her alcohol.

878
00:48:02,985 --> 00:48:04,955
If you don't, she's gonna have
a shitty night.

879
00:48:05,156 --> 00:48:07,127
That's all I'm saying. Come on.

880
00:48:07,928 --> 00:48:09,899
We bingo, bango, ready to go, go?

881
00:48:10,500 --> 00:48:13,028
- Good luck on your exam tomorroW.
- Good luck on your exam.

882
00:48:13,239 --> 00:48:16,144
- You don't Wanna ride the bus.
- Buses smell like piss, generally.

883
00:48:16,347 --> 00:48:17,315
- You knoW Why?
- Why?

884
00:48:17,515 --> 00:48:19,109
People piss on them.

885
00:48:25,265 --> 00:48:30,230
You knoW, one of you bros could've
come up and sat up With me.

886
00:48:30,443 --> 00:48:32,140
- We're fine back here.
- Back's fine.

887
00:48:32,347 --> 00:48:34,283
Safe in the back seat.

888
00:48:37,759 --> 00:48:38,818
- Oh, my God.
- What's up?

889
00:48:40,197 --> 00:48:42,794
- Hey, Jules.
- Who is it? Who's on the phone?

890
00:48:43,003 --> 00:48:44,472
Seth. Hey, Where are you?

891
00:48:44,673 --> 00:48:48,135
I'm in a cab right noW,
on the Way to a liquor store.

892
00:48:48,348 --> 00:48:50,147
Good. I can't Wait
for you to get here.

893
00:48:50,352 --> 00:48:52,880
Well, I hope your friends
are ready to get fucked up.

894
00:48:54,494 --> 00:48:55,723
<i>I'm sure they will be.</i>

895
00:48:55,930 --> 00:48:58,128
- Okay, I'll see you soon.
- <i>Peace.</i>

896
00:48:59,104 --> 00:49:00,903
Oh, man! Dude, this is crazy.

897
00:49:01,108 --> 00:49:03,841
She called, she said,
"I can't Wait for you to get there."

898
00:49:04,048 --> 00:49:06,986
That sounds like
she fully Wants it, man! Oh, yeah!

899
00:49:07,188 --> 00:49:11,687
Who's gonna give it to her, huh,
my man? You, that's Who.

900
00:49:11,897 --> 00:49:14,095
Man.

901
00:49:14,470 --> 00:49:16,133
You guys on MySpace, or...?

902
00:49:29,235 --> 00:49:33,266
Officers? I can ansWer those
questions noW if you Want me to.

903
00:49:33,477 --> 00:49:36,506
We get the gist of it. You Were
buying beer, some guys punched you.

904
00:49:36,717 --> 00:49:38,915
Don't Worry about it.
We're not gonna find them.

905
00:49:39,122 --> 00:49:41,685
- Case closed.
- But it Was only...

906
00:49:53,085 --> 00:49:56,581
- But it Was only one guy.
- Only one guy? Shit.

907
00:49:56,793 --> 00:49:58,387
HoW am I supposed to
find one guy?

908
00:49:58,597 --> 00:50:02,037
This job really isn't hoW, you knoW,
shoWs like <i>CSI</i> make it out to be.

909
00:50:02,238 --> 00:50:05,871
When I first joined the force, I assumed
there Was semen on everything...

910
00:50:06,079 --> 00:50:08,550
...and there Was some, like,
huge semen database...

911
00:50:08,751 --> 00:50:11,918
...that had every bad guy's semen in it.
There isn't. That doesn't exist.

912
00:50:12,125 --> 00:50:14,926
I often go to sleep and dream of
Waking up in a World Where...

913
00:50:15,131 --> 00:50:17,568
...everything's covered in semen.
- I mean, Who doesn't?

914
00:50:17,770 --> 00:50:19,741
Lt'd be nice.
Like that crime scene today.

915
00:50:19,942 --> 00:50:22,379
If the man had ejaculated
and then punched you...

916
00:50:22,581 --> 00:50:24,210
...We'd have a shot at catching him.

917
00:50:24,418 --> 00:50:26,650
- No Way.
- Just punched in the face, no semen.

918
00:50:26,857 --> 00:50:29,350
- No semen.
- Story of my life.

919
00:50:34,573 --> 00:50:38,378
Michaels here, he's six months in.

920
00:50:39,217 --> 00:50:41,619
He's young,
but the Force is strong With this one.

921
00:50:41,821 --> 00:50:44,224
Learning you are, young padaWan.

922
00:50:44,427 --> 00:50:46,021
Thank you very much.

923
00:50:47,300 --> 00:50:49,668
- That's Yoda.
- Are you familiar With Yoda?

924
00:50:49,873 --> 00:50:51,364
From <i>Attack of the Clones?</i>

925
00:50:51,575 --> 00:50:55,641
<i>We have a 245 at East 24 and</i>
<i>Montgomery, Bailey's Bar and Grill.</i>

926
00:50:55,851 --> 00:50:57,821
Car 98 on it.

927
00:50:58,023 --> 00:51:00,961
See, Michaels, you alWays
take a call at a bar because...

928
00:51:01,163 --> 00:51:03,225
...better or Worse,
you get a beer out of it.

929
00:51:04,170 --> 00:51:05,229
Pretty sWeet, huh?

930
00:51:05,439 --> 00:51:07,534
- True that. Amazing thinking.
- Hey, McLovin.

931
00:51:07,744 --> 00:51:10,807
We got a situation at Bailey's,
so We'll drop you off after, all right?

932
00:51:11,017 --> 00:51:13,045
Actually, I kind of
have to be someWhere...

933
00:51:13,255 --> 00:51:16,318
- SWeet. Sit tight.
- Set course for Bailey's, Warp 10.

934
00:51:16,528 --> 00:51:17,861
Engage.

935
00:51:23,577 --> 00:51:24,807
Yeah.

936
00:51:25,013 --> 00:51:28,076
Welcome to the Thunderdome.

937
00:51:30,225 --> 00:51:32,856
Hey, man, are you sure it's cool
that We're here With you?

938
00:51:33,064 --> 00:51:34,397
Oh, definitely, man.

939
00:51:34,601 --> 00:51:36,571
I'm essentially
best friends With the guy...

940
00:51:36,772 --> 00:51:38,708
...so a bunch of my buds
are coming.

941
00:51:38,910 --> 00:51:41,711
We're gonna rock out
With our cocks out. Just kidding.

942
00:51:41,916 --> 00:51:44,649
- We are gonna rock out.
- Just go, just go.

943
00:51:44,855 --> 00:51:46,826
What's up? What's up? What's up?

944
00:51:48,062 --> 00:51:50,465
Hello, hello. Hey, guys.

945
00:52:08,272 --> 00:52:10,401
This is something
a smart person Wouldn't do.

946
00:52:10,610 --> 00:52:13,241
Look, just act cool and act casual,
and try and look old.

947
00:52:13,450 --> 00:52:16,114
We'll get the booze
and get the fuck out of here, okay?

948
00:52:20,064 --> 00:52:22,193
Hey, Where the party at? Right.

949
00:52:22,402 --> 00:52:25,169
- You got those shots, bro?
- It's coming.

950
00:52:26,177 --> 00:52:27,668
Come on, let's party.

951
00:52:27,881 --> 00:52:31,286
Come on. Do it up.

952
00:52:37,133 --> 00:52:39,297
We should grab one of these buckets
and get out.

953
00:52:39,505 --> 00:52:42,272
You out of your mind? HoW are We
gonna get a fucking bucket out?

954
00:52:42,478 --> 00:52:44,345
- Dude, What the fuck?
- Hey, man.

955
00:52:44,548 --> 00:52:46,347
What the fuck do you think
you're doing?

956
00:52:46,553 --> 00:52:49,582
- What are you...? What? Nothing.
- You using my phone?

957
00:52:49,793 --> 00:52:53,426
- What do you think you're doing?
- Hang up. Nothing.

958
00:52:53,635 --> 00:52:55,502
What... What...
What's Wrong, Mark?

959
00:52:55,706 --> 00:52:58,405
You Weren't invited.
Get the fuck out of here.

960
00:52:58,612 --> 00:53:01,710
- Come on, Mark. It's cool, man.
- You using my fucking phone?

961
00:53:01,919 --> 00:53:03,718
You calling your
fucking friends again?

962
00:53:03,923 --> 00:53:06,019
You calling your friends,
your fantastic friends?

963
00:53:06,228 --> 00:53:08,130
No. I mean, yes. But I mean I'll...

964
00:53:08,333 --> 00:53:10,770
Come on, man, just relax.
Mark, please.

965
00:53:10,972 --> 00:53:13,136
Get the fuck out of here.
The fuck out of my house.

966
00:53:13,344 --> 00:53:14,813
Get the fuck out of my house.

967
00:53:15,014 --> 00:53:18,180
- This is my house.
- Don't be such a dick, man!

968
00:53:18,555 --> 00:53:19,955
What the fuck?

969
00:53:20,158 --> 00:53:22,151
Mark! You really Wanna do this, man?

970
00:53:22,363 --> 00:53:24,960
Here We go.
We're really gonna do this?

971
00:53:26,505 --> 00:53:28,304
That's right, motherfucker.

972
00:53:29,444 --> 00:53:31,676
Come on, pussy. Get up, dude.

973
00:53:32,217 --> 00:53:34,950
Oh, shit. I'm sorry, bro.
I'm sorry, bro. I'm sorry, bro.

974
00:53:35,156 --> 00:53:38,755
Tiger got out of the cage, man.
All right? I'm sorry. Come on, Mark.

975
00:53:38,965 --> 00:53:41,128
Let's just chill.
Everyone just chill out.

976
00:53:41,637 --> 00:53:43,539
Truce, man.

977
00:53:46,447 --> 00:53:48,383
Right in the nads!

978
00:53:50,932 --> 00:53:54,497
This is for your friends.
Here, have another one.

979
00:53:54,707 --> 00:53:57,907
Shit. Oh, shit, oh, shit, oh, shit.
Oh, my God. What do We do?

980
00:53:58,113 --> 00:53:59,810
- Come on. Come on.
- Choose one.

981
00:54:00,919 --> 00:54:05,760
- We can slip out the back, man.
- Come on. Let's hurry up and do this.

982
00:54:05,963 --> 00:54:08,058
Are you crazy, man?
Wanna end up like that guy?

983
00:54:08,269 --> 00:54:10,831
Not me. I need my nuts, man,
for a lot of things.

984
00:54:11,041 --> 00:54:12,772
- We need liquor.
- You need it. I don't.

985
00:54:12,978 --> 00:54:15,642
I'm gonna tell Becca hoW I feel.
Maybe she'll get With me.

986
00:54:15,850 --> 00:54:18,151
I'm not gonna get her
drunk out of her mind.

987
00:54:18,355 --> 00:54:21,122
Oh, really? Then hoW come
you never made a move, you pussy?

988
00:54:21,328 --> 00:54:24,699
Because I respect her, Seth. I'm not
gonna put unfair pressure on her.

989
00:54:24,902 --> 00:54:26,896
I don't see a problem.
Let's just do it.

990
00:54:27,107 --> 00:54:29,806
We're leaving, okay?
You Wanna get killed for liquor?

991
00:54:30,013 --> 00:54:33,316
No, but I Would get killed for pussy,
no questions asked.

992
00:54:33,521 --> 00:54:36,653
- Fuck this, man.
- You're just gonna bail on me?

993
00:54:36,861 --> 00:54:39,731
- I'm going.
- Fucking bitch.

994
00:54:40,336 --> 00:54:42,636
Move, people.

995
00:54:43,642 --> 00:54:47,275
- Thank you.
- Oh, I love this place.

996
00:54:56,469 --> 00:54:58,098
What the hell is going on in there?

997
00:54:58,306 --> 00:55:00,538
If the bullets start flying,
hit the deck.

998
00:55:00,745 --> 00:55:02,942
You pissed everyWhere,
you son of a bitch!

999
00:55:03,149 --> 00:55:06,384
EveryWhere? You didn't
see me pissing anyWhere.

1000
00:55:06,590 --> 00:55:08,320
I don't knoW
What you're talking about.

1001
00:55:08,526 --> 00:55:10,223
Take your nuts out of your shells!

1002
00:55:10,431 --> 00:55:12,024
Michaels, I got your back.

1003
00:55:12,235 --> 00:55:14,137
Why don't you shoW this rummy
hoW We roll?

1004
00:55:14,339 --> 00:55:15,637
10-4.

1005
00:55:16,243 --> 00:55:19,238
Excuse me, sir.
Stop What you are doing at once.

1006
00:55:20,552 --> 00:55:23,683
- Blue guys!
- Resisting. Resisting!

1007
00:55:23,893 --> 00:55:25,451
- Slater!
- Michaels!

1008
00:55:25,929 --> 00:55:27,158
Everybody stay calm.

1009
00:55:29,035 --> 00:55:32,202
- Everybody stay calm.
- Get the fuck out of my Way!

1010
00:55:32,609 --> 00:55:34,374
Stay calm! Fuck!

1011
00:55:35,315 --> 00:55:37,218
- Should I shoot him?
- No, no, no!

1012
00:55:37,420 --> 00:55:39,686
- No!
- Stop him, McLovin!

1013
00:55:39,892 --> 00:55:42,625
McLovin, stop him!
Do it, do it, do it, do it!

1014
00:55:47,174 --> 00:55:50,408
Please stop it, you fucking bum.
What the fuck?

1015
00:56:05,111 --> 00:56:08,106
McLovin! Nice!

1016
00:56:08,685 --> 00:56:10,587
He just came at me.
I took him doWn.

1017
00:56:10,790 --> 00:56:13,318
- I'm buying you a beer, McLovin.
- I'm buying you one too.

1018
00:56:13,529 --> 00:56:16,092
Take note. That's hoW
you take doWn a motherfucker.

1019
00:56:16,302 --> 00:56:17,668
That's right.

1020
00:56:17,871 --> 00:56:20,433
McLovin in the fucking house!

1021
00:56:55,249 --> 00:56:59,588
Hey. You dance hot.

1022
00:57:00,527 --> 00:57:02,224
Thank you.

1023
00:57:18,063 --> 00:57:21,867
Okay, okay. Here We... Here We go.

1024
00:57:22,739 --> 00:57:24,436
- Hello?
- <i>Evan, it's Becca.</i>

1025
00:57:24,643 --> 00:57:26,374
Oh, Becca. Hi.

1026
00:57:26,582 --> 00:57:30,817
Hey. Hello. Hey. Becca.

1027
00:57:31,223 --> 00:57:32,715
- Becca...
- <i>Evan, can you hear me?</i>

1028
00:57:32,927 --> 00:57:34,954
- Hello? What?
- <i>Can you hear- -? Piece of shit!</i>

1029
00:57:35,165 --> 00:57:37,534
Guy sells me
a piece of shit fucking phone.

1030
00:57:37,737 --> 00:57:39,172
- Becca?
- It's Becca.

1031
00:57:39,374 --> 00:57:41,367
<i>I get one bar</i>
<i>everywhere I fucking go.</i>

1032
00:57:41,578 --> 00:57:44,346
- What is he saying?
- <i>Fucking asshole.</i>

1033
00:57:44,552 --> 00:57:46,317
- I think...
- What happened?

1034
00:57:46,522 --> 00:57:48,081
Son-of-a-fucking-bitch
phone company.

1035
00:57:48,292 --> 00:57:50,957
- What? It's rude. Hello?
- <i>Fuck. You suck.</i>

1036
00:57:51,164 --> 00:57:52,793
Bullshit phone. Piece of shit.

1037
00:57:53,002 --> 00:57:55,337
<i>I swear I'll bitchslap you</i>
<i>so fucking hard.</i>

1038
00:57:55,540 --> 00:57:57,100
- What?
- Bec...?

1039
00:58:41,203 --> 00:58:43,070
Thanks.

1040
00:58:44,777 --> 00:58:46,507
This is fucking crazy.

1041
00:58:55,566 --> 00:58:58,833
Hey. Look What fell out of the truck!

1042
00:59:00,675 --> 00:59:02,110
You're full of shit.

1043
00:59:02,312 --> 00:59:04,248
Yeah, I knoW.

1044
00:59:04,951 --> 00:59:09,552
Dude. Dude.
We're so gonna get fucked up.

1045
00:59:09,762 --> 00:59:12,096
- All right.
- Hey.

1046
00:59:12,635 --> 00:59:14,264
What is that?

1047
00:59:15,641 --> 00:59:17,270
I don't knoW. What?

1048
00:59:17,478 --> 00:59:21,214
That fucking stain on your pants, idiot.
What is that?

1049
00:59:21,720 --> 00:59:23,815
- What are you talking about, man?
- Dude.

1050
00:59:24,761 --> 00:59:27,197
- Is that blood?
- What the fuck is that?

1051
00:59:27,399 --> 00:59:29,370
- Are you bleeding?
- I'm not cut or anything.

1052
00:59:29,571 --> 00:59:32,270
- Why Would I be bleeding?
- It's fucking blood, man.

1053
00:59:33,445 --> 00:59:36,109
Were you dancing
With some chick in there?

1054
00:59:36,685 --> 00:59:38,917
- Yeah, so?
- It's blood.

1055
00:59:39,123 --> 00:59:42,654
- Dude, that's not funny.
- It's blood, dude.

1056
00:59:42,865 --> 00:59:46,396
But Why Would I be bleeding?
Why the fuck Would I be bl...?

1057
00:59:46,606 --> 00:59:48,371
Dude, Why Would there be bl...?

1058
00:59:50,681 --> 00:59:53,652
Oh, fuck. Oh, my God.

1059
00:59:55,857 --> 00:59:59,262
Oh, shit.
I'm gonna fucking throW up.

1060
00:59:59,466 --> 01:00:00,991
Someone perioded
on my fucking leg?

1061
01:00:01,202 --> 01:00:03,264
- Oh, shit.
- What the fuck do I do?

1062
01:00:03,474 --> 01:00:05,707
I've never before
seen that in my life!

1063
01:00:05,913 --> 01:00:07,576
This is so disgusting.

1064
01:00:07,783 --> 01:00:09,275
- Yes, it is.
- I'm gonna go get Bill.

1065
01:00:09,487 --> 01:00:11,012
- He's gotta check this shit out.
- Fuck, yeah.

1066
01:00:11,223 --> 01:00:14,423
No. Who's Bill? Don't tell Bill!
Bill has nothing to do With this!

1067
01:00:14,630 --> 01:00:17,192
Hey, calm doWn.
Let me get a picture of that real quick.

1068
01:00:17,403 --> 01:00:18,735
No, you can't have a picture!

1069
01:00:18,939 --> 01:00:20,807
- Dude, stop!
- Bill, Bill! Check it out!

1070
01:00:21,010 --> 01:00:22,912
This kid's got period blood
on his slacks.

1071
01:00:23,114 --> 01:00:24,913
It's merlot.
That's What you don't get.

1072
01:00:25,118 --> 01:00:27,749
Hey, Pat! This jerk-off's
got period blood on his pants!

1073
01:00:27,959 --> 01:00:29,929
- Please stop.
- God, man, let me see.

1074
01:00:30,129 --> 01:00:33,067
Oh, my God,
that's a fucking man-gina, man.

1075
01:00:33,270 --> 01:00:36,674
- Do you need a tampon? I could...
- Wait, Wait. I have one! I have one!

1076
01:00:37,345 --> 01:00:39,338
Yeah, right? I don't knoW.

1077
01:00:39,550 --> 01:00:42,579
- I gotta Wash this off. Is this the line?
- What does it look like?

1078
01:00:42,789 --> 01:00:44,452
Fuck me, right?

1079
01:00:59,724 --> 01:01:02,218
"Yeah, I'm McLovin.
I'd like to buy some..."

1080
01:01:04,434 --> 01:01:06,027
Shit.

1081
01:01:06,238 --> 01:01:08,572
- ReWind, reWind.
- ReWind it. Yeah!

1082
01:01:08,776 --> 01:01:10,804
So hot. Let's see it again.

1083
01:01:13,286 --> 01:01:16,690
- Your legs lifted off the ground.
- That is bona fide badass, man.

1084
01:01:16,894 --> 01:01:19,262
You gotta keep that tape, McLovin.
It is badass.

1085
01:01:19,465 --> 01:01:20,728
- It really is.
- Really?

1086
01:01:20,934 --> 01:01:23,770
Well, don't you guys, like,
need it for, like, evidence or...?

1087
01:01:23,974 --> 01:01:27,140
The only thing that's evidence of
is you can take a hit like a champ.

1088
01:01:27,347 --> 01:01:29,044
Seriously. Take that.

1089
01:01:29,251 --> 01:01:33,853
Are there any ladies
We'd like to shoW this tape to?

1090
01:01:34,630 --> 01:01:38,161
No. You don't Wanna meet a chick
in a bar, man. Seriously.

1091
01:01:38,371 --> 01:01:41,002
That Was a turning point
in my life, When I realized that.

1092
01:01:41,211 --> 01:01:45,414
You gotta go to other places. You gotta
go to a spin class, a farmers' market...

1093
01:01:45,620 --> 01:01:48,319
...pumpkin patch,
given the time of year.

1094
01:01:48,526 --> 01:01:50,997
Just someWhere social,
non-threatening.

1095
01:01:51,198 --> 01:01:54,433
- You knoW, something like that.
- Yeah, I met the missus at paintball.

1096
01:01:54,639 --> 01:01:57,610
Yeah, I shot her in the neck.
And We just...

1097
01:01:57,812 --> 01:01:59,679
And We just hit it off, you knoW.

1098
01:01:59,883 --> 01:02:03,323
My first Wife...
Who is a Whore, by the Way.

1099
01:02:03,524 --> 01:02:04,857
- Where do you think I met her?

1100
01:02:05,060 --> 01:02:07,896
A bar. A bar.

1101
01:02:08,100 --> 01:02:10,093
- It Was this bar.
- It Was this bar.

1102
01:02:10,305 --> 01:02:12,468
Yeah, it Was this bar.

1103
01:02:12,743 --> 01:02:16,444
Bought her a Binion's,
complimented her on her tote bag...

1104
01:02:16,651 --> 01:02:21,525
...and next thing I knoW, she's putting
her mouth around the tip of my penis.

1105
01:02:22,329 --> 01:02:24,356
You don't have to tell me that.

1106
01:02:24,568 --> 01:02:27,335
- Right in there.
- She opened up my World, sexually.

1107
01:02:27,540 --> 01:02:29,943
On our Wedding night,
We had group sex.

1108
01:02:30,146 --> 01:02:31,513
I Wasn't involved in it.

1109
01:02:31,716 --> 01:02:34,243
- But I could hear it through the Wall.
- I Was.

1110
01:02:34,454 --> 01:02:37,449
She Was amazing. And then it Was
exactly 23 months later...

1111
01:02:37,660 --> 01:02:39,688
...that I found out
she Was an actual Whore.

1112
01:02:39,899 --> 01:02:41,869
- We discovered her on the street.
- Yeah.

1113
01:02:42,070 --> 01:02:43,505
I'm sorry.

1114
01:02:43,707 --> 01:02:45,940
She Was bad.
Fucking Whoring bitch.

1115
01:02:46,145 --> 01:02:49,585
- But you got a neW Wife noW, so...
- Yeah. Yeah.

1116
01:02:49,786 --> 01:02:52,087
And she is Wonderful.

1117
01:02:52,292 --> 01:02:54,262
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- You'll meet her.

1118
01:02:54,463 --> 01:02:56,627
You knoW What?
I bet I knoW your trick, McLovin.

1119
01:02:56,835 --> 01:02:59,170
- You play the Whole myst...
- <i>Calling all units.</i>

1120
01:02:59,374 --> 01:03:01,003
Just turn that off.

1121
01:03:01,211 --> 01:03:04,206
<i>Send backup!</i>
<i>There's so much blood-</i> -

1122
01:03:04,418 --> 01:03:08,152
I bet you play the Whole
mysterious-guy thing, right?

1123
01:03:08,960 --> 01:03:12,160
Yeah, seriously.
HoW's it going With the ladies?

1124
01:03:12,434 --> 01:03:16,465
It's not the going With the ladies
I care about...

1125
01:03:16,676 --> 01:03:19,477
...it's the coming.

1126
01:03:21,353 --> 01:03:23,323
- I get it.
- What is it? What is it?

1127
01:03:23,524 --> 01:03:24,822
Like:

1128
01:03:25,027 --> 01:03:26,689
Like coming.

1129
01:03:29,569 --> 01:03:33,806
- That's funny. That is really funny.
- Oh, my God.

1130
01:03:38,822 --> 01:03:41,989
All right, looks like We got a call.
We can't pay for these.

1131
01:03:42,196 --> 01:03:43,493
10-4. We'll be right there.

1132
01:03:43,698 --> 01:03:46,329
- Speedy Gonzales, let's go.
- We should get road beers.

1133
01:03:46,871 --> 01:03:48,841
Hell, yeah,
We should get some road beers.

1134
01:03:49,043 --> 01:03:51,206
Can I have 13 beers to go, please?

1135
01:03:51,414 --> 01:03:54,649
Please. God, my fucking leg.

1136
01:04:10,922 --> 01:04:12,585
Fuck.

1137
01:04:38,847 --> 01:04:41,215
- I think it's him.
- Is it him?

1138
01:04:41,419 --> 01:04:42,682
- Hello?
- <i>Hey, Becca.</i>

1139
01:04:42,888 --> 01:04:46,589
Hi, I had a bad reception.
So about your Goldslick...

1140
01:04:46,797 --> 01:04:49,496
- Guys, shut up.
- Hey, What's going on over there?

1141
01:04:49,703 --> 01:04:51,764
It's nothing. It's just...

1142
01:04:51,974 --> 01:04:54,844
I Was just calling, you knoW,
to see if you Were coming...

1143
01:04:55,046 --> 01:04:58,281
...because I thought maybe you Were
stuck at, like, a nightclub...

1144
01:04:58,487 --> 01:05:01,015
...or a cocktail party or something.

1145
01:05:01,226 --> 01:05:04,495
No, no, I'm gonna be there for sure.
Full throttle.

1146
01:05:04,700 --> 01:05:06,397
- <i>Charlie's Angels 2.</i>
- <i>Awesome.</i>

1147
01:05:08,308 --> 01:05:10,608
- <i>I can't wait to see you. Evan?</i>
- Okay, bye.

1148
01:05:10,813 --> 01:05:14,275
That Was the first time I ever did coke.
Off that bitch's nipple. That Was so...

1149
01:05:14,488 --> 01:05:16,219
- A little White sniff.
- That Was aWesome.

1150
01:05:16,425 --> 01:05:17,393
That Was gorgeous.

1151
01:05:17,594 --> 01:05:20,863
Hey, hey, hey.
You guys, stay in this room, man.

1152
01:05:21,068 --> 01:05:24,269
They're gonna kill that guy tonight.
That chick's boyfriend is pissed.

1153
01:05:24,475 --> 01:05:26,001
Yeah. He's a beast.

1154
01:05:26,212 --> 01:05:29,241
I've been praying for a fight.
I'm literally Waking up and praying...

1155
01:05:29,453 --> 01:05:31,388
...to see a fucking fight.
- Hey, hey, hey.

1156
01:05:33,627 --> 01:05:34,789
Who's that guy?

1157
01:05:39,840 --> 01:05:40,830
- Hi.
- Who is that guy?

1158
01:05:41,043 --> 01:05:43,070
- Who's this guy?
- Pleasure to see you fellas.

1159
01:05:43,281 --> 01:05:44,340
Hi, everyone.

1160
01:05:44,551 --> 01:05:46,213
- Who are you?
- I'm nobody.

1161
01:05:46,421 --> 01:05:47,979
No, no, no. I knoW you. I knoW you.

1162
01:05:48,191 --> 01:05:50,423
He Was at that party
I Was telling you about.

1163
01:05:50,629 --> 01:05:51,791
- No, no.
- Who is it?

1164
01:05:51,999 --> 01:05:55,130
Remember? He's Jimmy's brother.
The guy. The singer.

1165
01:05:55,573 --> 01:05:57,976
- No.
- He's the guy With the beautiful voice.

1166
01:05:58,178 --> 01:06:00,741
- The fucking singer, Jimmy's brother!
- That's not me, man.

1167
01:06:00,951 --> 01:06:02,682
- Oh, my God.
- Sing for us! Sing.

1168
01:06:02,888 --> 01:06:04,357
"It's not me"? You fucking lying?

1169
01:06:04,558 --> 01:06:07,655
No, I don't mean to accuse you guys
of being ill-informed, but...

1170
01:06:07,865 --> 01:06:10,233
My brother came from Scottsdale,
Arizona to be here.

1171
01:06:10,437 --> 01:06:11,803
You're not gonna sing for him?

1172
01:06:12,006 --> 01:06:13,168
- Fucking bullshit.
- Sing.

1173
01:06:13,376 --> 01:06:15,539
- You're a fucking singer.
- You sing good.

1174
01:06:15,748 --> 01:06:17,216
- Sing it again.
- Like a bird.

1175
01:06:17,419 --> 01:06:20,084
- No, I knoW, I just... I Want to.
- You Want a line of cocaine?

1176
01:06:20,291 --> 01:06:21,384
- No Way, man.
- Yeah.

1177
01:06:21,593 --> 01:06:23,757
Don't make this Weird. Sing.

1178
01:06:23,965 --> 01:06:26,128
- Sing it again.
- Turbo.

1179
01:06:30,512 --> 01:06:32,540
- Fuck! Over!
- Okay, Watch this.

1180
01:06:32,751 --> 01:06:35,587
I'll get it right on the nose.

1181
01:06:35,790 --> 01:06:38,023
You're gonna fuck it up.
You're gonna fuck it up.

1182
01:06:38,229 --> 01:06:40,062
Under!

1183
01:06:40,266 --> 01:06:42,463
I feel hammered.
That doesn't make any sense.

1184
01:06:42,671 --> 01:06:45,268
- You're a fucking pussy.
- Okay, okay. Great, great.

1185
01:06:45,477 --> 01:06:48,939
- Okay, McLovin, see if you can do it.
- The kid's gonna nail it.

1186
01:06:49,151 --> 01:06:52,021
Come on, McLovin.
Do it, buddy. Come on, buddy!

1187
01:06:52,225 --> 01:06:54,822
- Bring it!
- 0.08, motherfuckers!

1188
01:06:55,030 --> 01:06:57,695
- Man!
- That's my boy!

1189
01:06:58,103 --> 01:07:00,038
- Yes!
- Beginner's luck. Beginner's luck.

1190
01:07:00,908 --> 01:07:03,710
So, What's it like to have guns?

1191
01:07:03,915 --> 01:07:06,614
It is aWesome, McLovin.

1192
01:07:06,821 --> 01:07:08,484
- I mean, it's mindbl...
- It's great.

1193
01:07:08,691 --> 01:07:11,424
I haven't had one for long,
a feW months, but I'll tell you...

1194
01:07:11,631 --> 01:07:13,396
...it's like having tWo cocks.
- Yup.

1195
01:07:13,602 --> 01:07:16,437
If one of your cocks
could kill someone.

1196
01:07:17,543 --> 01:07:20,106
- Can I hold one?
- What?

1197
01:07:20,315 --> 01:07:21,614
Can I hold one of your guns?

1198
01:07:24,891 --> 01:07:27,955
- Yeah, sure.
- Fine With me. Why not?

1199
01:07:28,165 --> 01:07:30,466
Everyone should hold a gun
at least a couple times.

1200
01:07:30,671 --> 01:07:32,106
Yeah, there you go.

1201
01:07:32,308 --> 01:07:34,642
- Have a blast.
- "Have a blast."

1202
01:07:34,847 --> 01:07:39,015
- That's funny.
- I've never held one of these before.

1203
01:07:39,223 --> 01:07:41,956
- Are they hard to shoot?
- Lf you're Michaels, they are.

1204
01:07:42,162 --> 01:07:43,859
- He can't shoot Worth dick.
- What?

1205
01:07:44,066 --> 01:07:45,558
I can shoot. What are you...? Wait.

1206
01:07:45,769 --> 01:07:48,069
- I can't shoot Worth dick?
- You cannot shoot.

1207
01:07:48,275 --> 01:07:50,711
- I shot that cat last Week.
- It Was already dead, man.

1208
01:07:50,914 --> 01:07:52,472
- I still shot it.
- That cat Was dead.

1209
01:07:52,683 --> 01:07:54,550
There's only one Way
to settle this, guys.

1210
01:07:55,121 --> 01:07:56,613
- Shoot-off.
- Shoot-off.

1211
01:07:56,825 --> 01:07:59,661
- Shoot-off!
- Shoot-off!

1212
01:07:59,865 --> 01:08:01,562
There's a lot of reasons
Why I like you.

1213
01:08:01,769 --> 01:08:04,069
I mean, you're handsome
and you're a good friend.

1214
01:08:04,275 --> 01:08:08,306
Dude, there he is. That's the guy.
Hey, Mark, right there.

1215
01:08:10,219 --> 01:08:11,245
Oh, you got a stain too.

1216
01:08:13,092 --> 01:08:15,255
- We're blood brothers.
- Shut the fuck up.

1217
01:08:15,463 --> 01:08:17,991
You're in my house,
you ansWer my questions.

1218
01:08:18,202 --> 01:08:20,104
What Were you doing
dancing With Jacinda?

1219
01:08:22,813 --> 01:08:24,076
I don't even dance. I just...

1220
01:08:24,282 --> 01:08:26,810
I don't even dance ever, so...
I've never even tried it.

1221
01:08:27,021 --> 01:08:29,685
Then Where the hell did this
come from, asshole?

1222
01:08:31,163 --> 01:08:33,691
Maybe you and I rubbed up against
each other at some point.

1223
01:08:33,902 --> 01:08:36,874
I don't remember. Maybe it Was
some ricochet scenario. I don't knoW.

1224
01:08:37,076 --> 01:08:39,103
- HoW am I supposed to knoW?
- Kick his ass, Mark.

1225
01:08:39,313 --> 01:08:41,078
Shut the fuck up, Scarlett.

1226
01:08:41,952 --> 01:08:44,651
Where do you get off
dancing With my fiancée?

1227
01:08:53,110 --> 01:08:54,169
To some girl.

1228
01:09:07,572 --> 01:09:08,904
Talk about the hurting.

1229
01:09:19,164 --> 01:09:20,599
- Shit.
- All right.

1230
01:09:43,613 --> 01:09:45,276
- Yo! Fight!
- Move it!

1231
01:09:45,484 --> 01:09:47,215
- Go, check this out!
- Oh, fuck!

1232
01:09:47,422 --> 01:09:49,392
And What the hell is this?

1233
01:09:49,893 --> 01:09:53,196
- I don't fucking... It's detergent.
- Yeah, What are you doing With it?

1234
01:09:54,971 --> 01:09:58,001
I got fucking blood on my pants.

1235
01:09:58,211 --> 01:09:59,737
Get doWn.

1236
01:10:01,752 --> 01:10:04,189
What the fuck is this all about, man?
Are you...?

1237
01:10:05,226 --> 01:10:08,562
- Well, fuck me.
- Fellas.

1238
01:10:09,134 --> 01:10:12,106
Oh, shit,
I've been tackled by little girls!

1239
01:10:12,308 --> 01:10:13,401
You die! You're next!

1240
01:10:16,148 --> 01:10:20,920
I should fucking kill you,
you motherfucker!

1241
01:10:21,126 --> 01:10:25,089
- Hold him, Jimmy's brother! Hold him!
- What do you mean? No. No Way!

1242
01:10:25,301 --> 01:10:27,032
- You humiliated me!
- I'm sorry!

1243
01:10:27,238 --> 01:10:30,803
- You used my leg as a tampon!
- I'm calling the cops.

1244
01:10:31,013 --> 01:10:35,716
Evan! Come on! Move!

1245
01:10:35,956 --> 01:10:38,587
Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck.

1246
01:10:38,795 --> 01:10:42,964
Yeah. Fifth and PaysvieW. Hurry.

1247
01:10:43,171 --> 01:10:45,904
Mark, I called the cops.
You should hide your gun.

1248
01:10:46,144 --> 01:10:47,737
You're a fucking pussy.

1249
01:10:47,948 --> 01:10:49,177
Don't listen to him, officer.

1250
01:10:49,384 --> 01:10:51,820
If you make this,
We're no longer friends, Michaels.

1251
01:10:52,055 --> 01:10:54,458
- You're a fucking pussy.
- Cheating. You're cheating.

1252
01:10:55,596 --> 01:11:00,266
- Fuck me.
- Oh, suck on my nuts, Slater!

1253
01:11:00,474 --> 01:11:02,307
All right, you...
That Was a lucky shot.

1254
01:11:02,511 --> 01:11:05,678
- That Was a lucky shot.
- I rule.

1255
01:11:05,885 --> 01:11:07,114
I got jizzed on. All right.

1256
01:11:07,355 --> 01:11:09,382
- Can I shoot one?
- Yeah, go nuts. Go nuts.

1257
01:11:09,593 --> 01:11:11,062
Have a good time, man.

1258
01:11:11,263 --> 01:11:14,167
Empty the clip.
Empty the clip on it, man. Shit!

1259
01:11:14,369 --> 01:11:18,333
The cops! Bail! Bail! Bail!
Shotgun, shotgun! Damn it!

1260
01:11:19,782 --> 01:11:21,148
Shotgun.

1261
01:11:30,570 --> 01:11:33,133
- What a rush.
- What do you guys Wanna do?

1262
01:11:33,343 --> 01:11:35,780
- Man, let's get drunk!
- Let's get more fucked up!

1263
01:11:35,981 --> 01:11:38,076
You're fucking living the dream,
Michaels!

1264
01:11:38,286 --> 01:11:39,254
Oh, man.

1265
01:11:39,456 --> 01:11:41,187
This is gonna be the best night ever.

1266
01:11:41,393 --> 01:11:43,829
- <i>Got a 257 at Fifth and Paysview.</i>
- Shit.

1267
01:11:44,031 --> 01:11:46,399
<i>All units in the area report</i>
<i>to Fifth and Paysview.</i>

1268
01:11:46,603 --> 01:11:48,903
- <i>Car 98, that's you. Do it.</i>
- Fuck.

1269
01:11:49,109 --> 01:11:51,170
- Shit.
- Shit.

1270
01:11:51,380 --> 01:11:54,649
Car 98 on it.
You dumb fucking Whore.

1271
01:11:54,854 --> 01:11:57,849
Hey, did she say We're gonna get
to shoot somebody or something?

1272
01:11:58,061 --> 01:11:59,359
Oh, God, I Wish.

1273
01:11:59,597 --> 01:12:02,967
It's probably some lame house party.
We'll drop you off after. Cool?

1274
01:12:03,203 --> 01:12:05,470
Yeah, man.
Let's shoW these fuckers hoW We roll!

1275
01:12:20,173 --> 01:12:23,807
- You fucking prick.
- What?

1276
01:12:26,754 --> 01:12:30,694
- You bailed on me.
- I didn't bail on you.

1277
01:12:30,895 --> 01:12:32,957
Yeah, you did.

1278
01:12:33,167 --> 01:12:36,003
You said you Were gonna
do something and you didn't do it.

1279
01:12:36,207 --> 01:12:37,334
That's bailing.

1280
01:12:37,542 --> 01:12:40,777
You're the one that dragged me to
that fucking party With those lunatics.

1281
01:12:40,983 --> 01:12:45,948
- I didn't bail on you.
- You bailed on me, okay?

1282
01:12:46,161 --> 01:12:48,563
You bailed on me this morning
When Jesse spat on me...

1283
01:12:48,766 --> 01:12:50,394
...and you're bailing on me
next year.

1284
01:12:50,604 --> 01:12:53,667
What the fuck? It finally comes out.
That's good, man.

1285
01:12:53,877 --> 01:12:55,813
We Were supposed to go
to college together.

1286
01:12:56,047 --> 01:12:58,108
Since We Were kids,
since elementary school...

1287
01:12:58,318 --> 01:13:00,755
...that's all We've ever talked about,
us going together.

1288
01:13:00,957 --> 01:13:02,586
And you got into
fucking Dartmouth.

1289
01:13:02,794 --> 01:13:04,788
You're making me feel
like I'm a bad guy.

1290
01:13:05,000 --> 01:13:07,938
What...? I didn't do anything Wrong.
I got into a good school.

1291
01:13:08,707 --> 01:13:11,874
HoW the fuck am I supposed to get
into Dartmouth? You kneW I couldn't.

1292
01:13:12,114 --> 01:13:13,582
HoW fucking selfish are you?

1293
01:13:13,784 --> 01:13:15,811
You had no problem letting Fogell
take the fall.

1294
01:13:16,022 --> 01:13:17,992
You don't Want me going
to a good school.

1295
01:13:18,193 --> 01:13:20,186
- Fuck, man!
- So, What the fuck do you Want?

1296
01:13:20,398 --> 01:13:22,926
I'm not gonna let you
sloW me doWn anymore, Seth.

1297
01:13:26,110 --> 01:13:27,169
What are you saying?

1298
01:13:27,914 --> 01:13:31,615
I've Wasted the last three years
sitting around talking bullshit With you.

1299
01:13:31,822 --> 01:13:33,792
Instead of chasing girls
and making friends...

1300
01:13:33,993 --> 01:13:36,989
...l've just sat around
Wasting all my time With you.

1301
01:13:37,200 --> 01:13:39,797
And noW I'm going to college
a fucking friendless virgin.

1302
01:13:40,039 --> 01:13:43,501
Is this about Becca?
This is about some girl, man?

1303
01:13:43,714 --> 01:13:45,149
- I like her!
- Who gives a fuck?

1304
01:13:45,351 --> 01:13:47,514
She's some fucking girl!
You gonna go out With her?

1305
01:13:47,722 --> 01:13:50,216
- What about after that?
- Fuck you, you're a piece of shit.

1306
01:13:50,728 --> 01:13:53,495
Fuck you! And next time
you're pissed off about something...

1307
01:13:53,701 --> 01:13:56,537
...don't keep it inside for 10 years,
say it like a fucking man!

1308
01:13:56,741 --> 01:13:57,709
- Don't touch me.
- Fuck you!

1309
01:14:00,248 --> 01:14:03,186
Hey, McLovin, are the numbers
on your side odd or even?

1310
01:14:03,389 --> 01:14:07,123
- I don't knoW. It's too dark to see.
- We got flashlights.

1311
01:14:07,329 --> 01:14:09,094
Oh, that's true.

1312
01:14:14,811 --> 01:14:16,678
Where the fuck are We?

1313
01:14:17,550 --> 01:14:19,521
- Hey, Slater.
- What's that?

1314
01:14:19,755 --> 01:14:21,486
Slater.

1315
01:14:24,899 --> 01:14:28,532
NoW, young Michaels, you Will die.

1316
01:14:30,110 --> 01:14:33,446
All right. Come on, stop it.
I can't fucking see. I can't see. Fuck it.

1317
01:14:33,651 --> 01:14:35,450
- Like it?
- Hey, fuck off, that hurts.

1318
01:14:35,655 --> 01:14:37,386
- You stop first.
- Not until you stop.

1319
01:14:37,592 --> 01:14:39,221
- Stop it, asshole.
- Hey, you stop.

1320
01:14:40,298 --> 01:14:42,325
- Fuck you, Evan!
- Don't fucking touch me.

1321
01:14:54,261 --> 01:14:55,354
Why did you do that?

1322
01:14:55,563 --> 01:14:57,727
- You shined the light in my face.
- You did too.

1323
01:14:57,935 --> 01:14:59,961
- I'm driving.
- We Were playing Lightsabers.

1324
01:15:00,172 --> 01:15:02,200
- Excuse me.
- Oh, my God.

1325
01:15:02,410 --> 01:15:04,813
Are you guys gonna make sure
he's okay?

1326
01:15:08,055 --> 01:15:09,319
- Check on him.
- You check.

1327
01:15:09,526 --> 01:15:12,988
- You go out there and check on him.
- Fuck that. You go.

1328
01:15:13,200 --> 01:15:17,538
Balls. Okay, We'll both go out there
and check on him.

1329
01:15:19,012 --> 01:15:21,882
I can't believe this is happening again.
What are the odds?

1330
01:15:22,418 --> 01:15:24,047
Fuck.

1331
01:15:28,064 --> 01:15:31,765
- Is everyone okay?
- Yeah, We're great, thanks.

1332
01:15:31,972 --> 01:15:36,436
Hey, hey, Where's the love?

1333
01:15:36,647 --> 01:15:41,112
- He's okay. He's fine.
- Stand right next to your friend.

1334
01:15:41,325 --> 01:15:43,158
- Get over there.
- I got them.

1335
01:15:43,362 --> 01:15:44,694
You got these guys?

1336
01:15:51,546 --> 01:15:53,413
You boys doing
a bit of drinking tonight?

1337
01:15:53,617 --> 01:15:57,752
- No, officer. Not at all. Not... We...
- We found those.

1338
01:15:57,959 --> 01:15:59,087
I don't believe you.

1339
01:16:02,770 --> 01:16:04,933
Freeze. Stand right there.

1340
01:16:05,141 --> 01:16:07,203
- We're telling the truth.
- Keep it going.

1341
01:16:07,413 --> 01:16:09,747
- Don't be a hero tonight, guys.
- Wrong night for that.

1342
01:16:09,951 --> 01:16:11,511
You gotta fucking take care of this.

1343
01:16:11,721 --> 01:16:15,786
No. Look, I am not fixing your mistakes
again, okay? Fuck that shit.

1344
01:16:15,997 --> 01:16:18,297
I don't Wanna get shitcanned.
I like this job.

1345
01:16:18,502 --> 01:16:20,769
Me too. I get free haircuts.
I'm not taking the fall.

1346
01:16:20,974 --> 01:16:22,603
Okay, okay!

1347
01:16:23,613 --> 01:16:25,777
We're gonna arrest
these tWo little dipshits, okay?

1348
01:16:25,985 --> 01:16:27,715
And We're gonna pin it on them.

1349
01:16:28,389 --> 01:16:29,857
Yeah, do What you have to do.

1350
01:16:36,339 --> 01:16:37,399
Spread your shit!

1351
01:16:37,608 --> 01:16:40,637
Get on the ground!
Loaded gun, ready to go!

1352
01:16:40,849 --> 01:16:43,445
Spread your shit!
Pussies on the pavement, fellas.

1353
01:16:43,655 --> 01:16:45,851
- Come on!
- Please don't shoot, sir.

1354
01:16:46,058 --> 01:16:48,655
"Please don't shoot."
Shut up and spread your shit!

1355
01:16:50,234 --> 01:16:53,138
I am the laW! Okay?

1356
01:16:53,341 --> 01:16:54,468
NoW hold hands.

1357
01:16:54,677 --> 01:16:56,078
- What?
- Why?

1358
01:16:56,280 --> 01:16:59,879
You don't Want an asshole Where your
face used to be, Whaling Jennings.

1359
01:17:00,088 --> 01:17:02,491
- Hold his fucking hand!
- Fucking hold my hand.

1360
01:17:02,694 --> 01:17:05,063
There. That's not so hard, is it?

1361
01:17:05,266 --> 01:17:07,703
Here, McLovin, have a cigarette.

1362
01:17:08,940 --> 01:17:10,705
Smoke up. Life's short, you knoW.

1363
01:17:11,479 --> 01:17:13,472
Suck it in, my friend.

1364
01:17:13,683 --> 01:17:16,246
Suck it long and deep.

1365
01:17:16,457 --> 01:17:17,948
Enjoy it.

1366
01:17:18,561 --> 01:17:21,123
McLovin, McLovin, McLovin.

1367
01:17:22,602 --> 01:17:27,840
- You like Officer Slater and myself?
- Yeah, you guys are aWesome.

1368
01:17:28,047 --> 01:17:31,178
Thanks.
We really like you too, McLovin.

1369
01:17:31,387 --> 01:17:32,947
So here's What's about to happen.

1370
01:17:33,157 --> 01:17:34,592
We're gonna arrest these guys...

1371
01:17:34,794 --> 01:17:38,359
...you're gonna Write a Witness report
saying they leapt in front of our car...

1372
01:17:38,569 --> 01:17:40,903
...and there Was nothing We could do.
Sound cool?

1373
01:17:42,176 --> 01:17:45,080
- Yeah, that's fine.
- Good.

1374
01:17:45,282 --> 01:17:47,583
That's good.
Pretend he's your little sister.

1375
01:17:47,788 --> 01:17:49,781
Your little sister With the...

1376
01:18:00,680 --> 01:18:01,705
What the fuck?

1377
01:18:14,109 --> 01:18:15,635
Fagell?

1378
01:18:24,966 --> 01:18:26,959
- Shit!
- Shit!

1379
01:18:30,978 --> 01:18:32,344
Run! Run!

1380
01:18:32,547 --> 01:18:33,777
Wait.

1381
01:18:33,984 --> 01:18:37,389
Hold on, I gotta get all the booze.
Seth, Wait up!

1382
01:18:37,592 --> 01:18:39,255
McLovin bailed!

1383
01:18:39,462 --> 01:18:41,523
Chase the kid!

1384
01:18:49,149 --> 01:18:50,241
Stop!

1385
01:19:11,194 --> 01:19:13,323
That Was a fast kid.

1386
01:19:16,004 --> 01:19:20,446
I Want a ride! You hear me?
You can't unarrest me!

1387
01:19:22,952 --> 01:19:24,444
Stop!

1388
01:19:26,593 --> 01:19:30,499
- McLovin!
- Come on.

1389
01:19:32,473 --> 01:19:33,634
McLovin!

1390
01:19:34,377 --> 01:19:37,144
McLovin! Why?

1391
01:19:39,087 --> 01:19:40,146
McLovin, come back!

1392
01:19:42,059 --> 01:19:47,058
My hand! Monster!
Nicole! Nicole, get Daddy.

1393
01:19:47,269 --> 01:19:49,763
- Get Daddy.
- Get Daddy!

1394
01:19:49,975 --> 01:19:52,572
- Oh, shit.
- Get aWay from my kids!

1395
01:19:55,888 --> 01:19:58,051
You sick sons of bitches!

1396
01:20:01,065 --> 01:20:02,556
What the fuck?

1397
01:20:08,347 --> 01:20:10,784
Michaels, are you okay?

1398
01:20:11,019 --> 01:20:12,784
- It's just beer.
- Give me a break.

1399
01:20:12,990 --> 01:20:14,584
- It's just beer.
- Man up.

1400
01:20:14,794 --> 01:20:16,388
What happened?
What, did you lose him?

1401
01:20:16,597 --> 01:20:19,363
He's a freak.
He's the fastest kid alive.

1402
01:20:19,570 --> 01:20:22,097
- This is not good.
- He's the fastest kid alive.

1403
01:20:22,342 --> 01:20:25,371
Fastest kid alive, my ass. Come on.
What are We gonna do?

1404
01:20:25,682 --> 01:20:27,585
I'll shoot my gun in the air.

1405
01:20:27,821 --> 01:20:29,757
Give me a fucking Warning
before you do it.

1406
01:20:29,958 --> 01:20:31,928
I'll scare him out of Wherever
he's hiding.

1407
01:20:32,130 --> 01:20:34,795
This isn't gonna do shit.
Get in the car. Get in the car.

1408
01:20:35,002 --> 01:20:36,835
This is your fault, you piece of...

1409
01:20:37,374 --> 01:20:39,776
Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck.
They shot Seth.

1410
01:20:39,979 --> 01:20:42,109
They fucking shot Seth, I knoW it.

1411
01:20:42,853 --> 01:20:44,082
Holy shit.

1412
01:20:44,288 --> 01:20:45,278
Holy shit. Holy shit.

1413
01:20:46,894 --> 01:20:47,987
- Should I run?
- Yes.

1414
01:20:52,740 --> 01:20:54,834
- Fuck. Stop!
- Stop the bus!

1415
01:20:55,043 --> 01:20:56,478
- Stop it!
- It's stopping.

1416
01:20:56,680 --> 01:20:58,844
- It's stopping.
- Oh, thank God.

1417
01:21:01,625 --> 01:21:03,857
Hey, Evan, pay for me, please.

1418
01:21:06,234 --> 01:21:07,202
That's me and him.

1419
01:21:08,305 --> 01:21:11,836
Hey, hey. It's you.

1420
01:21:12,046 --> 01:21:13,275
McMuffin.

1421
01:21:13,682 --> 01:21:15,049
- You knoW this guy?
- It's...

1422
01:21:15,252 --> 01:21:19,284
Ain't got no cop people to help you
keep your booze noW, do you?

1423
01:21:19,495 --> 01:21:22,832
Hey! Back the fuck up, man,
or I'll beat the shit out of you.

1424
01:21:23,036 --> 01:21:25,097
- Give me the booze.
- <i>Hey! Back the fuck up.</i>

1425
01:21:25,307 --> 01:21:28,508
<i>Back the fuck up. Back the fuck up.</i>

1426
01:21:28,714 --> 01:21:30,376
Please, please, calm doWn, sir.

1427
01:21:39,569 --> 01:21:44,911
Goldslick.

1428
01:21:56,372 --> 01:21:58,468
Get off the bus
or I'm calling the cops.

1429
01:22:05,190 --> 01:22:07,251
Eat shit, bum.

1430
01:22:07,628 --> 01:22:09,723
Oh, shit, guys.
We're three blocks aWay, man.

1431
01:22:09,933 --> 01:22:12,335
We made it. We made it
With the booze and everything.

1432
01:22:12,539 --> 01:22:13,871
We made it.

1433
01:22:14,075 --> 01:22:15,510
Hold this.

1434
01:22:16,247 --> 01:22:18,775
I can't believe
you still have the liquor.

1435
01:22:19,821 --> 01:22:20,880
It's aWesome.

1436
01:22:21,090 --> 01:22:24,153
Yeah, I told you the idea Would Work.
I fooled those cops.

1437
01:22:24,396 --> 01:22:27,368
I'm McLovin. I am McLovin.

1438
01:22:29,239 --> 01:22:30,640
Why do you guys have detergent?

1439
01:22:30,843 --> 01:22:33,815
I don't understand Why you Were
smoking cigarettes With those cops.

1440
01:22:34,017 --> 01:22:35,646
Because I fucking rule.

1441
01:22:35,854 --> 01:22:39,156
- We are so gonna get laid tonight.
- I am. I'm gonna get laid.

1442
01:22:39,361 --> 01:22:41,762
We're finally gonna
get our drinks on.

1443
01:22:43,937 --> 01:22:45,634
I can't believe Becca's bottle broke.

1444
01:22:45,841 --> 01:22:47,208
- I'm sure it'll be fine.
- Yeah.

1445
01:22:47,411 --> 01:22:50,315
I thought you didn't need it.
You Were gonna tell her hoW you feel.

1446
01:22:50,517 --> 01:22:53,045
Good luck getting Jules drunk enough
to have sex With you.

1447
01:22:53,256 --> 01:22:55,193
- What's Wrong With you guys?
- Nothing.

1448
01:22:55,394 --> 01:22:58,560
You tWo femmes can talk about it
next year at your little slumber party.

1449
01:22:58,769 --> 01:23:00,465
Oh, you told him.

1450
01:23:00,672 --> 01:23:03,303
- Told me What?
- Yeah. You're an idiot, Fogell.

1451
01:23:03,512 --> 01:23:05,311
- Well, We gotta tell him noW.
- No, We...

1452
01:23:05,516 --> 01:23:06,985
Well, he knoWs something's up.

1453
01:23:07,219 --> 01:23:09,486
What are you guys talking about?
Tell me noW.

1454
01:23:09,725 --> 01:23:11,888
Seth, me and Evan are
rooming together next year.

1455
01:23:12,097 --> 01:23:13,087
What's the big deal?

1456
01:23:13,299 --> 01:23:15,235
"Oh, my God,
Fogell's rooming With Evan."

1457
01:23:15,436 --> 01:23:17,132
Jeez, Why don't you go cry about it?

1458
01:23:17,339 --> 01:23:19,776
- I didn't tell you because...
- You're a backstabber...

1459
01:23:19,978 --> 01:23:23,213
...and you lied to your best friend
and you just don't care anymore?

1460
01:23:23,419 --> 01:23:25,617
I didn't expect this from you, Evan.

1461
01:23:26,091 --> 01:23:27,253
Not from you.

1462
01:23:27,461 --> 01:23:29,658
Give me that booze, Fagell.

1463
01:23:33,240 --> 01:23:36,212
We never should have had to hide
our arrangement.

1464
01:23:46,400 --> 01:23:48,735
- Seth's here.
- Seth, you're here.

1465
01:23:48,939 --> 01:23:52,673
Hi. Everybody, Seth has got it.

1466
01:24:15,962 --> 01:24:18,092
- Evan.
- Gaby, hey.

1467
01:24:18,301 --> 01:24:20,168
Where have you been?
You almost bleW it.

1468
01:24:20,371 --> 01:24:22,899
- What are you talking about?
- Becca. She's been Waiting.

1469
01:24:23,110 --> 01:24:24,409
She's over there.

1470
01:24:25,282 --> 01:24:26,580
She's Way smashed.

1471
01:24:26,786 --> 01:24:29,085
And she's been yammering
about you all night.

1472
01:24:29,289 --> 01:24:31,088
Really? What Was she saying?

1473
01:24:31,294 --> 01:24:33,389
She told you that she thinks
I'm a good guy?

1474
01:24:33,598 --> 01:24:36,161
No, no.
She said something more like:

1475
01:24:36,371 --> 01:24:38,899
"I Will fully bloW him tonight."

1476
01:24:39,143 --> 01:24:41,478
- What?
- I knoW.

1477
01:24:44,923 --> 01:24:47,154
- Yeah.
- But she's totally hammered...

1478
01:24:47,361 --> 01:24:50,265
...and if I get With her
and I'm not drunk, isn't that unethical?

1479
01:24:51,102 --> 01:24:52,502
Not if you're drunk too.

1480
01:24:53,841 --> 01:24:55,207
I guess not.

1481
01:24:55,411 --> 01:24:56,743
To Seth.

1482
01:24:56,947 --> 01:24:59,145
- To Seth!
- All right.

1483
01:24:59,352 --> 01:25:01,219
Who the fuck is Seth?

1484
01:25:01,423 --> 01:25:03,120
I'm Seth!

1485
01:25:04,829 --> 01:25:07,062
Let's do another one to me.

1486
01:25:18,124 --> 01:25:19,718
Oh, boy.

1487
01:25:20,463 --> 01:25:22,524
Calm doWn. Calm doWn, man.

1488
01:25:22,734 --> 01:25:24,796
Calm doWn. She likes you.

1489
01:25:25,173 --> 01:25:27,406
She Wants to suck on your penis.

1490
01:25:27,645 --> 01:25:29,274
It's a good thing.

1491
01:25:29,482 --> 01:25:33,149
It's the best thing.

1492
01:25:33,958 --> 01:25:35,621
Just doWn the hatch.

1493
01:26:03,485 --> 01:26:05,387
Fogell. What's up?

1494
01:26:52,420 --> 01:26:54,721
Evan, hey. Evie, come here.

1495
01:26:54,926 --> 01:26:56,327
Can you please help me up?

1496
01:26:56,529 --> 01:27:00,094
I fell doWn and none of these assholes
Will help me up.

1497
01:27:00,304 --> 01:27:02,867
- Shit.
- Becca.

1498
01:27:03,076 --> 01:27:05,172
I have been Waiting for you
for, like, ever.

1499
01:27:05,382 --> 01:27:07,352
- What took you so long?
- I knoW, it...

1500
01:27:07,552 --> 01:27:09,988
- Do you have my Goldslick?
- No, I can't even...

1501
01:27:10,190 --> 01:27:11,853
It's such a crazy story, okay?

1502
01:27:12,061 --> 01:27:15,364
- I sWear I Was try...
- It doesn't even matter.

1503
01:27:15,568 --> 01:27:18,062
Look. Look What We...
We can just drink this.

1504
01:27:18,274 --> 01:27:20,541
- Here. You could have a drink.
- Oh, no.

1505
01:27:20,746 --> 01:27:22,739
- I'm already pretty Wasted.
- Take a drink.

1506
01:27:22,951 --> 01:27:25,319
Okay, here's to you.
This is to Becca.

1507
01:27:25,522 --> 01:27:26,616
To Becca.

1508
01:27:26,825 --> 01:27:29,160
- To the respecting...
- Guys.

1509
01:27:29,364 --> 01:27:32,427
- Women.
To people respecting Women.

1510
01:27:32,637 --> 01:27:35,633
Okay. Yeah.

1511
01:27:38,083 --> 01:27:39,312
You're a lightWeight.

1512
01:27:40,688 --> 01:27:42,054
Hey.

1513
01:27:43,093 --> 01:27:46,362
You and me,
We should go upstairs, because...

1514
01:27:46,567 --> 01:27:50,702
Because I need to
tell you something. Okay?

1515
01:27:51,276 --> 01:27:53,440
You could just tell me here,
I mean...

1516
01:27:53,648 --> 01:27:58,386
I can't tell you, because
it's a secret for you from me.

1517
01:27:58,593 --> 01:28:00,654
- All right.
- So come. Come on. Okay.

1518
01:28:00,864 --> 01:28:02,025
- Bye, guys.
- Bye.

1519
01:28:02,233 --> 01:28:04,430
- Bye-bye.
- Bye.

1520
01:28:09,882 --> 01:28:13,151
You changed your name
to McLovin?

1521
01:28:15,026 --> 01:28:17,657
- That's so cool.
- Thanks.

1522
01:28:17,865 --> 01:28:21,737
So, like, What's HaWaii like?

1523
01:28:22,407 --> 01:28:23,774
All right. I am back.

1524
01:28:23,977 --> 01:28:26,244
I had to thank the peeps
for coming out, you knoW.

1525
01:28:26,450 --> 01:28:28,944
Jules. I Want you
to have a drink With me.

1526
01:28:29,155 --> 01:28:31,524
Just drink some of this.
You're gonna love it.

1527
01:28:31,727 --> 01:28:33,526
You're to...
I knoW you're gonna love it.

1528
01:28:33,731 --> 01:28:37,295
- You knoW, l...
- It's green beer. For your information.

1529
01:28:37,505 --> 01:28:40,136
You knoW, I'm actually good
right noW. But thank you.

1530
01:28:40,612 --> 01:28:43,847
And thank you very much
for bringing everything, again.

1531
01:28:44,053 --> 01:28:45,682
Seriously, it really made the night.

1532
01:28:45,890 --> 01:28:48,657
No, that's hoW I roll.
That's the thing.

1533
01:28:48,863 --> 01:28:51,699
It's no problems. You'll learn that.

1534
01:28:57,515 --> 01:29:02,150
I love talking
and conversing With you.

1535
01:29:02,358 --> 01:29:05,354
But I can't hear you, though,
because the music is so loud.

1536
01:29:05,565 --> 01:29:08,732
So do you Wanna go outside
and talk more?

1537
01:29:11,611 --> 01:29:14,241
Yeah. Sorry, sure.
You knoW, Why not?

1538
01:29:14,449 --> 01:29:16,419
Let's do it.
I haven't conversed in ages.

1539
01:29:16,620 --> 01:29:20,082
- Okay. Ladies... Ladies first.
- Okay.

1540
01:29:21,164 --> 01:29:23,134
- Thank you very much.
- No problem.

1541
01:29:23,335 --> 01:29:25,738
- Watch your step. I fell earlier today.
- You serious?

1542
01:29:25,941 --> 01:29:28,036
Well, I Was hit by a car.
It's a long story.

1543
01:29:28,613 --> 01:29:32,347
- Oh, shit. Careful.
- Okay, Well...

1544
01:29:33,455 --> 01:29:36,656
So loud. Don't let the parents hear.

1545
01:29:37,297 --> 01:29:39,164
You look so pretty.

1546
01:29:42,474 --> 01:29:46,677
- Are you okay?
- I so flirt With you in math.

1547
01:29:46,883 --> 01:29:49,012
Tell me about it. L... Samesies.

1548
01:29:49,221 --> 01:29:54,756
I've Wanted to tell you for so long
that you're the best girl.

1549
01:29:54,967 --> 01:29:59,875
I knoW. I've Wanted to get With you,
like, so hard.

1550
01:30:01,481 --> 01:30:03,815
Like so hard.

1551
01:30:09,765 --> 01:30:11,667
You're the best.

1552
01:30:11,870 --> 01:30:15,401
We'll take this sWeater off. I think so.

1553
01:30:15,611 --> 01:30:18,845
Just be careful, because it's a
meaningful sWeater to me. It's vintage.

1554
01:30:19,052 --> 01:30:20,111
Okay.

1555
01:30:20,855 --> 01:30:23,724
- Bought it at that vintage market.
- Just hurry.

1556
01:30:24,227 --> 01:30:26,755
- And this one.
- It's off.

1557
01:30:26,967 --> 01:30:29,062
Hey, Wait, careful.

1558
01:30:30,240 --> 01:30:31,766
- Oh, shit.
- Oh, my.

1559
01:30:31,977 --> 01:30:33,172
Put that there.

1560
01:30:33,381 --> 01:30:35,078
- NoW, looky, looky...
- Okay.

1561
01:30:35,285 --> 01:30:37,848
...What I got for you under here.
- Oh, my gosh.

1562
01:30:38,057 --> 01:30:39,856
You are the prettiest girl...

1563
01:30:40,061 --> 01:30:42,965
...this side of the Mississippi.
- I have a little something...

1564
01:30:43,167 --> 01:30:46,037
...for you under here.

1565
01:30:46,240 --> 01:30:47,265
You look so pretty.

1566
01:30:47,744 --> 01:30:50,044
- Look so pretty.
- Under there.

1567
01:30:50,249 --> 01:30:52,082
Hello.

1568
01:30:53,355 --> 01:30:55,382
For you.

1569
01:31:00,002 --> 01:31:04,444
You're the best. You're so unique.

1570
01:31:04,645 --> 01:31:06,114
Come here.

1571
01:31:06,315 --> 01:31:08,649
Evan, kiss me.

1572
01:31:08,988 --> 01:31:10,787
I like you so much.

1573
01:31:11,860 --> 01:31:13,727
Come on, McLovin.

1574
01:31:13,931 --> 01:31:15,764
I've never been
With an older guy before.

1575
01:31:15,969 --> 01:31:19,305
Well, it's Way better.

1576
01:31:19,510 --> 01:31:21,707
I knoW, We made some
kick-ass tiramisu earlier.

1577
01:31:21,915 --> 01:31:25,446
It Was deli... It looked Weird.
But it Was delicious.

1578
01:31:29,965 --> 01:31:33,166
What...? What's Wrong?

1579
01:31:33,807 --> 01:31:37,405
L... I Would prefer
if We Would just do that...

1580
01:31:37,614 --> 01:31:41,145
...at some other time.

1581
01:31:41,355 --> 01:31:44,419
No. There is no other time.
School is up.

1582
01:31:44,629 --> 01:31:48,900
- What's Wrong With right noW?
- Well, I mean, you're... You're drunk.

1583
01:31:49,606 --> 01:31:53,512
- You're, like, really, really drunk.
- So? You're drunk. You're drunk, Jules.

1584
01:31:53,714 --> 01:31:56,686
Yeah, I'm actually...
I'm not drunk at all.

1585
01:31:56,888 --> 01:31:59,451
I don't even drink, so it's...
I mean...

1586
01:32:00,695 --> 01:32:03,758
Jules, you drink. You drink.

1587
01:32:03,969 --> 01:32:06,805
Everybody... You...
You had me get liquor, so you drink.

1588
01:32:07,009 --> 01:32:08,034
It's like...

1589
01:32:08,244 --> 01:32:11,580
Well, yeah, because
I'm throWing a party, remember?

1590
01:32:11,784 --> 01:32:13,378
Other people drink
and so I just...

1591
01:32:13,588 --> 01:32:15,080
You...?

1592
01:32:16,461 --> 01:32:19,797
You don't Wanna, you knoW?

1593
01:32:21,605 --> 01:32:24,544
Not right noW.

1594
01:32:24,745 --> 01:32:27,808
You knoW, not While you're drunk.

1595
01:32:28,453 --> 01:32:30,446
But, you knoW, thank you.

1596
01:32:35,802 --> 01:32:40,335
- Evan. Evan, I'm so Wet.
- Oh, yeah.

1597
01:32:40,546 --> 01:32:43,848
They said that Would happen
in health, When I learned about it.

1598
01:32:44,053 --> 01:32:45,851
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

1599
01:32:46,056 --> 01:32:49,222
- They taught me about...
- Who's doWn there?

1600
01:32:49,430 --> 01:32:50,659
Yeah, it's your hand.

1601
01:32:55,577 --> 01:32:58,947
- Thank you, that's good.
- You have such a smooth cock.

1602
01:32:59,151 --> 01:33:01,178
Thank you.
You Would too if you Were a man.

1603
01:33:01,389 --> 01:33:03,882
But you got such a smooth chest.

1604
01:33:04,093 --> 01:33:06,758
I am gonna give you...

1605
01:33:06,966 --> 01:33:11,408
...the best bloW-J ever...

1606
01:33:11,610 --> 01:33:14,012
...With my mouth.

1607
01:33:14,215 --> 01:33:16,412
Why don't We...?
Why don't We just kiss a While?

1608
01:33:16,620 --> 01:33:20,219
Why don't We keep kissing for a bit,
instead of...?

1609
01:33:22,130 --> 01:33:23,690
HoW badly do you Wanna fuck me?

1610
01:33:24,169 --> 01:33:25,798
Jesus Christ.

1611
01:33:26,607 --> 01:33:27,575
Jesus, fuck.

1612
01:33:27,776 --> 01:33:29,039
- Hang on one second.
- What?

1613
01:33:29,245 --> 01:33:30,976
Becca,
I don't think you Wanna do this.

1614
01:33:31,184 --> 01:33:35,090
- You're really drunk.
- No, I'm not. I am not drunk.

1615
01:33:35,292 --> 01:33:39,461
- I see that you are. I think you are.
- And I really... I Want you inside me.

1616
01:33:39,668 --> 01:33:41,901
I Want you to be my first.
I Want you inside me.

1617
01:33:42,107 --> 01:33:44,304
So just... Just go With it.

1618
01:33:44,512 --> 01:33:46,448
- Let it happen.
- I knoW, but...

1619
01:33:46,950 --> 01:33:48,944
Becca, this is kind of intense.

1620
01:33:49,155 --> 01:33:53,494
And I just... I'm so drunk.
I can't even, like, process this.

1621
01:33:53,698 --> 01:33:56,033
And you're really pretty.

1622
01:33:56,237 --> 01:33:58,297
And I just think
this isn't hoW I pictured it.

1623
01:33:58,507 --> 01:34:02,949
I don't understand Why you have to be
such a little bitch about it.

1624
01:34:04,153 --> 01:34:07,284
- Did you just call me a bitch?
- Yes, a scared...

1625
01:34:07,492 --> 01:34:10,089
See, I, like,
I think We're not thinking clear...

1626
01:34:10,299 --> 01:34:11,562
Holy shit. Oh, my God.

1627
01:34:11,768 --> 01:34:14,137
- Go get Gaby.
- I'll go get her.

1628
01:34:14,340 --> 01:34:19,078
Oh, God. Oh, God.
Go get Gaby, please.

1629
01:34:33,313 --> 01:34:36,946
- I got a boner.
- Good.

1630
01:34:38,256 --> 01:34:40,853
- Do you have a condom?
- Yes.

1631
01:34:42,799 --> 01:34:44,769
And lube.

1632
01:34:44,971 --> 01:34:46,462
Seth?

1633
01:34:50,449 --> 01:34:52,886
Are...? Are you crying?

1634
01:34:53,288 --> 01:34:56,158
No, I just have something
in both my eyes.

1635
01:34:56,361 --> 01:34:57,523
I don't cry. That's funny.

1636
01:34:57,731 --> 01:34:59,963
You look... You look...
It looks like you're crying.

1637
01:35:00,169 --> 01:35:01,501
So...

1638
01:35:03,744 --> 01:35:06,078
It Was my last chance
and I fucked it up and...

1639
01:35:06,283 --> 01:35:07,841
Your last chance to do What?

1640
01:35:08,052 --> 01:35:11,081
To make you
my girlfriend for the summer.

1641
01:35:11,693 --> 01:35:14,529
You're, like, the coolest person
that's ever talked to me.

1642
01:35:14,732 --> 01:35:16,326
I thought We'd both be drunk.

1643
01:35:16,536 --> 01:35:19,269
What does me being drunk
have anything to do With it?

1644
01:35:19,475 --> 01:35:21,776
You'd never get With me
if you Were sober.

1645
01:35:21,981 --> 01:35:23,450
Look at you.

1646
01:35:24,520 --> 01:35:28,722
- Look at me.
- Seth, come on, you didn't bloW it.

1647
01:35:29,330 --> 01:35:30,923
I think maybe...

1648
01:35:31,567 --> 01:35:33,332
What the fuck?!

1649
01:35:33,538 --> 01:35:35,201
Help me.

1650
01:35:37,413 --> 01:35:38,381
Shirley.

1651
01:35:38,582 --> 01:35:40,643
I'm sorry.

1652
01:35:41,054 --> 01:35:43,547
- Someone forgot to call pest control.
- Yep.

1653
01:35:43,759 --> 01:35:45,592
Where you going?
Hey, party's still on.

1654
01:35:45,796 --> 01:35:47,025
- Where are you going?
- No.

1655
01:35:47,233 --> 01:35:50,433
If you're back there, get out.
Everyone, come on.

1656
01:35:50,639 --> 01:35:52,404
- We Will shoot you.
- Party's over.

1657
01:35:52,611 --> 01:35:54,102
- Evan.
- Get the hell out of here.

1658
01:35:54,315 --> 01:35:55,977
Keep your hands up.

1659
01:36:01,764 --> 01:36:04,463
Life's bullshit, Miroki.

1660
01:36:13,856 --> 01:36:15,826
Ev, Wake the fuck up, man.

1661
01:36:16,027 --> 01:36:18,328
We gotta go.
Those fucking cops are here, man.

1662
01:36:21,638 --> 01:36:23,939
"Oh, no, it's the cops."
We have a complaint.

1663
01:36:24,143 --> 01:36:26,671
- Evan, come on.
- Get the hell out of here right noW.

1664
01:36:26,882 --> 01:36:28,511
Get out of here.
She's not interested.

1665
01:36:28,719 --> 01:36:31,418
- Drop the crantini and move it, sister.
- See you, sugar tits.

1666
01:36:31,626 --> 01:36:32,594
Guys, come on, move.

1667
01:36:32,795 --> 01:36:35,926
Everybody out.
Leave the booze and go.

1668
01:36:37,103 --> 01:36:38,298
What the fuck, man?

1669
01:36:39,107 --> 01:36:40,370
What the fuck, Seth?

1670
01:36:40,578 --> 01:36:42,810
He's my best friend. Oh, shit.

1671
01:36:43,417 --> 01:36:45,820
Oh, shit. Come on.

1672
01:36:46,022 --> 01:36:48,653
I assume you all have guns
and crack.

1673
01:36:51,400 --> 01:36:55,134
Oh, my God, come on. Don't stop.

1674
01:36:57,713 --> 01:36:59,079
Okay, everyone...

1675
01:36:59,283 --> 01:37:02,119
...prepare to be fucked
by the long dick of the laW.

1676
01:37:02,322 --> 01:37:04,087
Get out.

1677
01:37:05,897 --> 01:37:06,887
Come on, go.

1678
01:37:11,141 --> 01:37:12,701
Fuck off, Seth.

1679
01:37:15,284 --> 01:37:16,479
Get a room.

1680
01:37:16,686 --> 01:37:19,089
I'm gonna save you.
I'm gonna save you, Evan.

1681
01:37:20,728 --> 01:37:22,391
Fuck.

1682
01:37:24,069 --> 01:37:27,269
Fuck. Fuck, man, so heavy.

1683
01:37:42,607 --> 01:37:45,010
It's in. Oh, my God, it's in.

1684
01:37:45,212 --> 01:37:47,581
All right, everybody out.
Come on, let's go.

1685
01:37:47,783 --> 01:37:50,152
McLovin! What the fuck?

1686
01:37:50,356 --> 01:37:52,725
- Officer Slater, is that you?
- You ran aWay from us.

1687
01:37:52,928 --> 01:37:54,898
Why did you run aWay?
Michaels, get up here.

1688
01:37:55,099 --> 01:37:57,036
- No. I didn't run aWay.
- What the fuck?

1689
01:37:57,237 --> 01:37:58,227
Why Would you do that?

1690
01:37:58,439 --> 01:38:00,933
- I Was disoriented from...
- Were you violating that girl?

1691
01:38:01,145 --> 01:38:03,548
You just violated her With your penis?
Michaels, look.

1692
01:38:03,751 --> 01:38:05,118
- McLovin?
- No, no, no.

1693
01:38:05,687 --> 01:38:07,179
No.

1694
01:38:07,825 --> 01:38:09,624
Holy shit.
Were you just getting laid?

1695
01:38:09,829 --> 01:38:12,494
No. Yeah, I Was, but...

1696
01:38:12,702 --> 01:38:14,969
- Yes, yes, he Was.
- It's not What you think, guys.

1697
01:38:15,174 --> 01:38:17,371
- I'm not even...
- Sit the fuck doWn. Stay doWn.

1698
01:38:17,579 --> 01:38:19,412
- Calm doWn.
- I thought We Were friends...

1699
01:38:19,617 --> 01:38:21,086
...and then you go running aWay.

1700
01:38:21,287 --> 01:38:22,916
Contain yourself.

1701
01:38:23,124 --> 01:38:24,616
- We're friends.
- Shut up.

1702
01:38:24,828 --> 01:38:27,094
- Calm doWn. Calm doWn, man.
- Why? What?

1703
01:38:27,300 --> 01:38:28,893
You just cock-blocked McLovin.
Okay?

1704
01:38:29,104 --> 01:38:30,595
He's our friend. We don't do that.

1705
01:38:30,808 --> 01:38:34,144
We should be guiding his cock,
not blocking it.

1706
01:38:34,348 --> 01:38:38,083
Just relax, okay?
Let's make this right.

1707
01:38:45,771 --> 01:38:48,038
Wait, What are you...?
What are you guys doing?

1708
01:38:48,243 --> 01:38:51,444
No, please, I can't... I can't go to jail.
Please, I can't go to jail.

1709
01:38:51,650 --> 01:38:55,454
No, look.
We're really sorry, McLovin.

1710
01:38:55,659 --> 01:38:58,994
This has... This has gone on...
This has gone Way too far.

1711
01:38:59,199 --> 01:39:02,262
What? What are you talking about?

1712
01:39:02,472 --> 01:39:06,413
We knoW you're not 25, man.
We're not idiots, McLovin.

1713
01:39:06,615 --> 01:39:09,109
- Yeah.
- Did you knoW the Whole time?

1714
01:39:09,320 --> 01:39:14,491
Look, When We Were your age,
We hated cops.

1715
01:39:14,698 --> 01:39:17,864
When We saW you
in the liquor store today, We just...

1716
01:39:18,071 --> 01:39:20,132
I guess We saW a bit of ourselves,
you knoW...

1717
01:39:20,342 --> 01:39:23,440
...and We just Wanted
to shoW you that...

1718
01:39:23,650 --> 01:39:26,019
...you knoW, cops can have
a fun time too, you knoW?

1719
01:39:26,222 --> 01:39:27,816
Yeah.

1720
01:39:28,594 --> 01:39:33,127
You knoW, in a Way,
I think We Wanted to shoW ourselves.

1721
01:39:34,874 --> 01:39:37,208
Also, I'm...

1722
01:39:37,412 --> 01:39:40,544
I'm really sorry
that I blocked your cock.

1723
01:39:41,221 --> 01:39:44,352
- Apology accepted.
- Seriously, man.

1724
01:39:45,395 --> 01:39:46,955
That feels good.

1725
01:39:47,166 --> 01:39:49,034
- It feels so good.
- I missed you guys.

1726
01:39:49,238 --> 01:39:51,606
I just Wish We could
make it up to you somehoW, man.

1727
01:39:51,810 --> 01:39:54,440
Well, do you think
you can do me a really big favor?

1728
01:39:54,648 --> 01:39:56,709
- What is it? Anything.
- Name it.

1729
01:39:56,919 --> 01:39:59,949
- This kid's fucking crazy.
- Stay back for your oWn safety.

1730
01:40:00,159 --> 01:40:02,460
Get off me, you fucking cops.
Get your hands off.

1731
01:40:02,665 --> 01:40:05,193
Do you knoW Who I am?
I'm Fogell.

1732
01:40:06,072 --> 01:40:09,477
- The joint can't hold me.
- Holy shit, Fogell's a badass.

1733
01:40:09,680 --> 01:40:12,651
I'm gonna break your glasses,
you fucking cop. You can't hold me.

1734
01:40:12,852 --> 01:40:13,946
Fucking pigs.

1735
01:40:18,932 --> 01:40:20,128
Oh, shit.

1736
01:40:22,739 --> 01:40:24,333
Nice mullet, asshole.

1737
01:40:24,978 --> 01:40:26,845
- You crazy.
- This kid's crazy.

1738
01:40:27,049 --> 01:40:30,112
He's nuts.
Well, We caught the infamous Fogell.

1739
01:40:30,322 --> 01:40:31,951
Get your hands...
Wait for me, Nicola.

1740
01:40:32,159 --> 01:40:33,594
Wait for me on the outside.

1741
01:40:34,531 --> 01:40:36,660
We Were gonna go to HaWaii.

1742
01:40:37,770 --> 01:40:39,467
Man, that's gonna get you
so much ass.

1743
01:40:39,674 --> 01:40:40,643
Seriously?

1744
01:40:40,844 --> 01:40:44,044
- I knoW What to do about the car.
- SWeet.

1745
01:40:44,652 --> 01:40:48,285
Fucking go. Fucking throW up.

1746
01:40:52,168 --> 01:40:53,534
Are you carrying me?

1747
01:40:53,738 --> 01:40:55,868
No, I'm saving you from the cops.

1748
01:40:56,243 --> 01:40:57,233
You saved me?

1749
01:40:59,082 --> 01:41:02,021
Well, I don't knoW What
you're talking about, but thanks.

1750
01:41:02,223 --> 01:41:04,351
Can l... Should I just Walk?

1751
01:41:04,559 --> 01:41:08,090
- Should I Walk?
- Yeah, sure.

1752
01:41:08,869 --> 01:41:12,867
- Okay.
- Where do you Wanna go?

1753
01:41:13,713 --> 01:41:16,844
Sleepover at my house?
You Wanna come sleep...?

1754
01:41:18,556 --> 01:41:21,528
- Okay.
- Okay.

1755
01:41:24,601 --> 01:41:26,298
Does your mom
still have pizza bagels?

1756
01:41:26,505 --> 01:41:28,134
Yeah. Lots.

1757
01:41:28,342 --> 01:41:30,278
Pizza bagels.

1758
01:41:38,531 --> 01:41:41,127
So by signing this,
you are officially saying...

1759
01:41:41,336 --> 01:41:43,773
...that as We stopped you
from being mugged...

1760
01:41:43,975 --> 01:41:46,879
...a crackhead stole our cruiser
and did God knoWs What With it.

1761
01:41:47,081 --> 01:41:49,678
- You cool to sign that?
- Of course. I oWe you guys my life.

1762
01:41:49,887 --> 01:41:52,484
We oWe you, Mc...
Wait, What's your real name again?

1763
01:41:52,694 --> 01:41:53,719
- Fogell.
- Fuck that.

1764
01:41:53,929 --> 01:41:56,492
- We're calling you McLovin.
- McLovin.

1765
01:41:56,702 --> 01:41:59,105
Let's do this dance, boys.

1766
01:42:22,722 --> 01:42:25,387
- Oh, my God.
- What did I tell you guys, right?

1767
01:42:25,596 --> 01:42:26,564
That Was crazy.

1768
01:42:32,576 --> 01:42:33,772
All right.

1769
01:42:33,979 --> 01:42:35,915
All right, noW, guys, check this out.

1770
01:42:36,116 --> 01:42:39,317
It's probably the greatest move
in doughnut-spinning history.

1771
01:42:39,524 --> 01:42:40,514
You paying attention?

1772
01:42:40,727 --> 01:42:43,995
Behold, the upWard-spiraling pigtail.

1773
01:42:44,201 --> 01:42:47,469
- Why is it called that?
- I don't knoW.

1774
01:42:51,649 --> 01:42:53,744
Make the badge proud, Slater.

1775
01:42:55,758 --> 01:42:57,921
He's not usually this drunk
When he does this...

1776
01:42:58,129 --> 01:43:01,261
...but I think
that could make it more cool.

1777
01:43:06,380 --> 01:43:08,111
McLovin!

1778
01:43:18,639 --> 01:43:19,698
Oh, no.

1779
01:43:20,510 --> 01:43:21,843
Fuck.

1780
01:43:28,259 --> 01:43:31,630
- Slater!
- Officer Slater.

1781
01:43:33,437 --> 01:43:36,375
All right. Fucking crazy.

1782
01:43:37,178 --> 01:43:38,146
Let's do this.

1783
01:43:39,015 --> 01:43:43,184
- Hurry, hurry. Let's go. Go, go.
- I'm going, I'm going, I'm going.

1784
01:43:43,390 --> 01:43:45,554
- I'm out, I'm out.
- Good, here We go, here We go.

1785
01:43:45,762 --> 01:43:47,857
Yeah? Yeah, okay. Back up.

1786
01:43:48,066 --> 01:43:50,663
Don't bloW yourself up, asshole.

1787
01:43:55,850 --> 01:43:59,346
Yes. Oh, my God.

1788
01:43:59,557 --> 01:44:01,959
It Worked. It Worked.

1789
01:44:02,162 --> 01:44:06,103
We Won. We Won.

1790
01:44:14,722 --> 01:44:16,624
Can We shoot at it?

1791
01:44:17,796 --> 01:44:20,927
I don't knoW. Can you?

1792
01:44:39,774 --> 01:44:41,471
Break yourself, fool.

1793
01:44:47,859 --> 01:44:49,350
Tight.

1794
01:44:49,561 --> 01:44:52,158
Listen, and then she said
she Was gonna give me a bloW-J.

1795
01:44:52,368 --> 01:44:56,102
- I can't believe she said that to you.
- Man, you have no idea.

1796
01:44:56,308 --> 01:44:59,178
- What Was she thinking?
- You don't even knoW.

1797
01:45:06,998 --> 01:45:10,996
I gotta tell you.
I gotta tell you something, Evan.

1798
01:45:11,207 --> 01:45:12,538
What?

1799
01:45:12,743 --> 01:45:14,610
I Was in your room, like,
three Weeks ago...

1800
01:45:14,813 --> 01:45:17,045
...While you Were taking a shit.

1801
01:45:17,252 --> 01:45:22,251
And I saW your housing, like, forms.

1802
01:45:22,764 --> 01:45:26,967
So I kneW you and Fogell
Were gonna live together, you knoW.

1803
01:45:27,173 --> 01:45:29,736
I'm sorry, man, I don't knoW.

1804
01:45:31,783 --> 01:45:35,884
I should've told you.
I don't knoW Why I didn't.

1805
01:45:36,092 --> 01:45:38,825
Don't... No, don't be sorry.
I should be sorry.

1806
01:45:39,031 --> 01:45:41,764
I Was being a dick.
I Was being a big dick to you.

1807
01:45:41,971 --> 01:45:43,201
No, l...

1808
01:45:43,407 --> 01:45:47,815
Listen, Seth, I Want you to knoW,
I don't Wanna live With Fogell.

1809
01:45:48,016 --> 01:45:52,982
I never Wanted to live With him.
I just don't... I ha...

1810
01:45:53,194 --> 01:45:55,357
I'm afraid to live With strangers.

1811
01:45:57,236 --> 01:45:58,363
I can't.

1812
01:45:59,474 --> 01:46:01,444
I can't do it.

1813
01:46:02,848 --> 01:46:05,581
I knoW, I knoW.

1814
01:46:06,888 --> 01:46:09,759
I can't believe you saved me.

1815
01:46:11,432 --> 01:46:13,561
You saved me.

1816
01:46:13,770 --> 01:46:16,674
I can't believe. I oWe you so...

1817
01:46:17,544 --> 01:46:21,679
You carried me. I love you.

1818
01:46:22,321 --> 01:46:23,754
I love you, man.

1819
01:46:26,730 --> 01:46:28,757
I love you.

1820
01:46:30,204 --> 01:46:34,839
I love you. I'm not even
embarrassed to say it. I just...

1821
01:46:35,047 --> 01:46:37,017
I lo... I love you.

1822
01:46:37,219 --> 01:46:38,881
- I'm not embarrassed.
- I love you.

1823
01:46:39,090 --> 01:46:40,558
I love you.

1824
01:46:40,760 --> 01:46:43,527
Why don't We say that every day?
Why can't We say it more often?

1825
01:46:43,733 --> 01:46:45,965
I just love you. I just Wanna
go to the rooftops and scream:

1826
01:46:46,171 --> 01:46:47,469
"I love my best friend, Evan."

1827
01:46:47,674 --> 01:46:51,307
- We should go up on my roof.
- For sure.

1828
01:46:51,516 --> 01:46:57,324
Like, When you Went aWay for Easter,
on your vacation, I missed you.

1829
01:46:57,528 --> 01:47:00,989
- I missed you too.
- I Want the World to knoW.

1830
01:47:01,436 --> 01:47:06,105
It's... It's the most beautiful thing
in the World.

1831
01:47:09,720 --> 01:47:13,251
Come here. Come here, man.

1832
01:47:23,949 --> 01:47:26,477
- I love you.
- I love you.

1833
01:47:39,515 --> 01:47:41,576
What the fuck?

1834
01:47:48,968 --> 01:47:53,968
- What up?
- Morning. Morning.

1835
01:47:54,446 --> 01:47:56,940
I should get moving.
I should get moving.

1836
01:47:57,151 --> 01:47:59,349
I should be getting
a move on, for sure.

1837
01:47:59,557 --> 01:48:02,529
Yeah, you don't...
I mean, you don't have to, you knoW.

1838
01:48:02,731 --> 01:48:05,794
I don't really have anything
going on.

1839
01:48:06,004 --> 01:48:08,532
You don't have to rush off like that.

1840
01:48:12,049 --> 01:48:14,076
You Wanna hang out?

1841
01:48:14,521 --> 01:48:16,958
I Was gonna go to the mall.

1842
01:48:17,160 --> 01:48:20,600
I have to get a neW comforter.

1843
01:48:21,236 --> 01:48:23,729
For college.
The mall, they Would sell that.

1844
01:48:23,942 --> 01:48:25,501
Cool. So...

1845
01:48:26,881 --> 01:48:29,146
...your mom's got huge tits.

1846
01:48:31,790 --> 01:48:33,054
What do you think?

1847
01:48:33,260 --> 01:48:34,627
I don't knoW, man. Don't ask me.

1848
01:48:34,830 --> 01:48:37,597
Because I don't give a shit
hoW pants look.

1849
01:48:37,803 --> 01:48:40,172
Yeah, I need someone's opinion.

1850
01:48:40,375 --> 01:48:43,712
Those are too tight.
Those are Way too tight.

1851
01:48:43,916 --> 01:48:46,386
- Yeah, but, like...
- Way too tight. You need to upgrade.

1852
01:48:46,587 --> 01:48:49,150
There's not enough pants Where
there should be. More pants.

1853
01:48:49,360 --> 01:48:51,729
Yeah, but...
I mean, does it look Weird?

1854
01:48:51,932 --> 01:48:55,303
Looks like you're standing funny. You
Wouldn't stand like that. Like a duck.

1855
01:48:55,506 --> 01:48:57,271
Yeah, but I'm doing like...

1856
01:48:57,477 --> 01:49:00,712
- I'm doing the college poses like...
- I don't knoW if you are.

1857
01:49:00,917 --> 01:49:02,819
- You might just be doing...
- Hey, prof.

1858
01:49:03,023 --> 01:49:05,084
- Okay.
- That test Was...

1859
01:49:05,728 --> 01:49:09,600
Hey, Susan. Are you gonna
party tonight or no?

1860
01:49:09,803 --> 01:49:13,368
Yeah, but that's just... It's like I Wish
there Were more pants Where...

1861
01:49:13,611 --> 01:49:14,841
You knoW, Where there aren't.

1862
01:49:15,081 --> 01:49:16,948
But When I Was Wearing
your dad's pants...

1863
01:49:17,152 --> 01:49:19,954
...I realized that if I Wear pants
that are a little too small...

1864
01:49:20,159 --> 01:49:21,855
...it might encourage me
to lose Weight.

1865
01:49:22,062 --> 01:49:23,964
And also,
chicks can kind of see, like...

1866
01:49:24,166 --> 01:49:26,797
...you knoW, the borders
and outline of my dick a little.

1867
01:49:27,005 --> 01:49:29,978
Yeah, man, they go nuts for that.
The male camel toe.

1868
01:49:30,179 --> 01:49:33,174
Yeah, the camel tail. It's right...

1869
01:49:33,386 --> 01:49:35,049
I knoW Where it is, Where it happens.

1870
01:49:35,256 --> 01:49:36,919
Like, right there.

1871
01:49:37,127 --> 01:49:40,691
It's like they're so tight that one ball is,
like, above my dick, even.

1872
01:49:40,900 --> 01:49:42,597
- Yeah, exactly.
- It's like three.

1873
01:49:42,804 --> 01:49:45,401
It's like a three thing.
It's like ball, dick, ball.

1874
01:49:45,610 --> 01:49:46,977
It's like a division sign.

1875
01:49:47,180 --> 01:49:48,979
Like a bunch of people
crammed into a van.

1876
01:49:49,919 --> 01:49:53,654
- Making my ass look Weird?
- It makes a lot of stuff look Weird.

1877
01:49:53,995 --> 01:49:55,429
No, those are Way too tight.

1878
01:49:56,266 --> 01:49:59,032
You're right, these look stupid.
Let's get the fuck out of here.

1879
01:49:59,239 --> 01:50:02,507
I'm really sorry about that.
I can't believe I actually did that.

1880
01:50:02,713 --> 01:50:04,774
I feel bad that I'm making you
buy me a neW one.

1881
01:50:04,984 --> 01:50:06,248
It's seems, like, ridiculous.

1882
01:50:06,454 --> 01:50:10,485
- No. I have to, it's puke. It's gross.
- Oh, my God.

1883
01:50:10,696 --> 01:50:13,189
Do alcoholics get hangovers?

1884
01:50:13,402 --> 01:50:16,203
Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit.
It's them.

1885
01:50:17,110 --> 01:50:21,016
- What the fuck do We do, man?
- Don't stop. I don't knoW.

1886
01:50:22,855 --> 01:50:25,292
- Hey.
- Hey.

1887
01:50:26,229 --> 01:50:27,926
HoW's it going?

1888
01:50:29,670 --> 01:50:32,436
It's so good to...
HoW are you feeling?

1889
01:50:33,076 --> 01:50:36,572
I've felt better. But I'll be fine.
HoW about you?

1890
01:50:37,686 --> 01:50:41,821
I'm okay, you knoW, yeah.
Did you have fun last night?

1891
01:50:44,366 --> 01:50:47,897
You knoW,
I actually don't remember much.

1892
01:50:48,108 --> 01:50:49,633
I don't remember anything.

1893
01:50:50,545 --> 01:50:53,518
- So Weird.
- Nothing.

1894
01:50:54,019 --> 01:50:56,616
I didn't puke on you, did I?

1895
01:50:57,093 --> 01:50:59,325
You didn't.
I remember that you... I avoided it.

1896
01:50:59,531 --> 01:51:03,631
It Whizzed right by me, and I said,
"Stay aWay from me," you knoW.

1897
01:51:04,275 --> 01:51:10,220
I'm really sorry about
everything last night, and I just...

1898
01:51:11,889 --> 01:51:14,326
Thank you for being
such a nice guy about it all.

1899
01:51:15,230 --> 01:51:16,859
That's okay, you knoW.

1900
01:51:17,067 --> 01:51:19,664
At least you don't have
a black eye from it.

1901
01:51:23,080 --> 01:51:26,212
- That looks terrible.
- Yeah.

1902
01:51:27,122 --> 01:51:31,426
You look great. You don't look terrible.
It's just, like, a bad bruise.

1903
01:51:31,632 --> 01:51:34,365
Everything's great, just from he...
This, just like right there.

1904
01:51:34,571 --> 01:51:36,165
- Your eye.
- Yeah, your eye.

1905
01:51:36,375 --> 01:51:38,004
Everything else is great.

1906
01:51:38,212 --> 01:51:42,210
But seriously,
I acted like a fucking idiot last night.

1907
01:51:44,926 --> 01:51:49,128
You don't deserve that.
So I'm sorry.

1908
01:51:49,969 --> 01:51:53,774
On the upside,
I think you look cool With a black eye.

1909
01:51:53,978 --> 01:51:57,349
I'm just gonna throW that out there.
I don't... I don't knoW.

1910
01:51:57,552 --> 01:52:01,548
Well, thank you, smart guy.
Thanks. That's actually Why I'm here.

1911
01:52:01,760 --> 01:52:05,063
Because I have to get
a ton of cover-up for the grad photo.

1912
01:52:05,267 --> 01:52:07,704
Oh, man. Fuck.

1913
01:52:07,906 --> 01:52:10,309
And I'm gonna get Jules
a neW comforter.

1914
01:52:10,512 --> 01:52:12,449
I have to get a comforter too.
For college.

1915
01:52:12,650 --> 01:52:15,178
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah, I just figured I Would need one.

1916
01:52:15,389 --> 01:52:17,291
So, Seth...

1917
01:52:18,629 --> 01:52:22,592
So do you Wanna come
buy me cover-up or something?

1918
01:52:22,804 --> 01:52:24,831
I mean, you kind of oWe me.

1919
01:52:26,244 --> 01:52:29,615
Yeah, definitely.
I Would love to do that.

1920
01:52:30,085 --> 01:52:31,987
I had such bad acne last year...

1921
01:52:32,191 --> 01:52:35,561
...that I pretty much became,
like, an expert on the stuff.

1922
01:52:36,132 --> 01:52:38,729
Well, you drove.
Evan drove me here, though, so...

1923
01:52:38,938 --> 01:52:40,966
Well, so...
Well, I mean, I have my dad's car.

1924
01:52:41,176 --> 01:52:44,012
So I could just give you a lift...

1925
01:52:44,216 --> 01:52:46,244
...and then Evan
could take Becca home.

1926
01:52:46,454 --> 01:52:48,856
If that Works.
I don't knoW if it's in your route.

1927
01:52:49,060 --> 01:52:50,289
It'd be fine With me.

1928
01:52:50,496 --> 01:52:53,263
Fine, yeah.
Maybe We can get some food.

1929
01:52:54,471 --> 01:52:55,733
Yeah, I'd like that.

1930
01:52:58,645 --> 01:53:00,308
So I guess I'll call you, then.

1931
01:53:00,517 --> 01:53:02,510
Yeah, give me a call.
Yeah, you have my number.

1932
01:53:02,721 --> 01:53:05,750
I have your information.
So put her there.

1933
01:53:05,961 --> 01:53:08,933
Perfect. Good. All right, man.

1934
01:53:09,134 --> 01:53:10,535
- Okay.
- Okay, guys.

1935
01:53:10,738 --> 01:53:12,264
- Becca.
- Bye, guys.

1936
01:53:12,474 --> 01:53:14,034
- Bye, have fun.
- See you, Jules.

1937
01:53:14,244 --> 01:53:17,376
Yeah, that's funny. Too funny.

1938
01:53:17,585 --> 01:53:20,079
Where do you Wanna go to eat?

1939
01:53:21,459 --> 01:53:24,728
So can you honestly help me figure out
What kind of cover-up to get?

1940
01:53:50,397 --> 01:54:00,499
THE END
Subtitles by: Reklame

1941
01:58:32,440 --> 01:58:33,840
I love you.