1
00:01:10,837 --> 00:01:12,202
Hey, sleepy head!

2
00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,601
- You up?
- What time is it?

3
00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:18,904
Almost noon.

4
00:01:19,546 --> 00:01:21,411
I'm afraid you've got to go.

5
00:01:22,148 --> 00:01:24,275
- Excuse me?
- You've got to go.

6
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:27,386
I have friends coming over
for brunch.

7
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,480
What? In My apartment?

8
00:01:39,632 --> 00:01:40,690
Sorry.

9
00:01:42,235 --> 00:01:45,204
3 years and you still treat me
like a one-night stand!

10
00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:04,784
Babies! Sorry, I'm late.
I had to deal with James.

11
00:02:04,924 --> 00:02:06,585
James? I thought you
broke up with James.

12
00:02:06,726 --> 00:02:09,388
I did. He's just not
taking it very well.

13
00:02:09,529 --> 00:02:11,997
What? All alone in his big,
empty castle?

14
00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:13,292
Be nice.

15
00:02:13,433 --> 00:02:15,697
Anyway, I had to give
his ego CPR.

16
00:02:16,236 --> 00:02:17,703
How tiresome.
What did you say?

17
00:02:17,837 --> 00:02:19,202
Oh you know, how great he is,
how he's going to make

18
00:02:19,339 --> 00:02:21,102
the right girl so happy,
how it's really not him,

19
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:23,106
- it's blah blah blah...
- And he believed you?

20
00:02:23,243 --> 00:02:26,007
Of course not!
So then I had to fuck him.

21
00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:27,204
Right.

22
00:02:28,047 --> 00:02:29,105
Where's Peter?

23
00:02:43,530 --> 00:02:45,191
Babies, we missed you
at brunch!

24
00:02:45,331 --> 00:02:47,595
Sorry, I had to finish
1500 words for Empire.

25
00:02:47,734 --> 00:02:49,395
- Talullah sends her love.
- How is she?

26
00:02:49,536 --> 00:02:52,004
In love! With this Jamaican model
I set her up with.

27
00:02:52,138 --> 00:02:54,402
Apparently, he shags her
4 times a day

28
00:02:54,541 --> 00:02:56,509
and inspires her to write
volumes of new poetry!

29
00:02:56,643 --> 00:02:59,111
- Isn't that great?
- No, I hate Talullah's poetry.

30
00:02:59,245 --> 00:03:01,611
Speaking of shags,
how was your date with Doug?

31
00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:03,982
- Fine.
- Fine? Just fine?

32
00:03:04,117 --> 00:03:05,084
Look, Jacks!

33
00:03:05,218 --> 00:03:07,482
I really appreciate you
trying to set me up with Doug

34
00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:08,985
And Phil and John.

35
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:11,181
- What's wrong with Doug?
- Nothing, I just...

36
00:03:11,324 --> 00:03:12,586
I just don't see much of
a future together.

37
00:03:12,725 --> 00:03:14,488
How do you know that
after one dinner?

38
00:03:14,627 --> 00:03:16,288
Maybe because we have
nothing in common?

39
00:03:16,429 --> 00:03:18,294
That's not true.
You're an artist, Doug's an artist.

40
00:03:18,431 --> 00:03:19,398
Doug's a florist!

41
00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:20,999
He's a horticultural designer.

42
00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:23,295
Yeah, whose 'life goal' is
to create a sculpture of

43
00:03:23,436 --> 00:03:25,996
Princess Diana entirely of
bougainvillea.

44
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:27,197
You are such a snob!

45
00:03:27,340 --> 00:03:29,205
I am not a snob!
I have hay fever.

46
00:03:29,342 --> 00:03:30,400
I'd be allergic to Doug's work.

47
00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:32,306
Look, Doug deserves better
than me.

48
00:03:32,445 --> 00:03:34,606
You're never going to find
anyone with that attitude.

49
00:03:34,747 --> 00:03:36,612
What attitude?
I'm just being realistic.

50
00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:39,082
If you're realistic,
then I'm the Queen of England.

51
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:41,779
Hey! I'm the Queen of England!

52
00:03:41,921 --> 00:03:44,287
Hello, your Majesty!

53
00:04:18,224 --> 00:04:20,283
Oh Daphne, you poor thing!

54
00:04:20,426 --> 00:04:22,189
Of course, I'll deal
with the shoot.

55
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,396
I can handle Sasha.

56
00:04:25,131 --> 00:04:28,794
OK. Lots of love, big kiss.
Bye bye.

57
00:04:30,136 --> 00:04:33,196
Since when do you say 'lots of
love, big kiss' to your boss?

58
00:04:33,339 --> 00:04:35,603
Since Daphne's going through
a nasty divorce.

59
00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:37,607
She needs positive affirmation.

60
00:04:38,745 --> 00:04:39,803
Babies, what's wrong?

61
00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:41,413
Nothing.
I'm just a little nervous.

62
00:04:41,547 --> 00:04:43,014
He's meant to have
a ferocious temper.

63
00:04:43,149 --> 00:04:44,081
Who?

64
00:04:44,217 --> 00:04:46,981
Marvin Bernstein.
The man I'm interviewing today.

65
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:49,384
Since when do you get nervous
about celebrity profiles?

66
00:04:49,522 --> 00:04:52,491
Since we're not talking about
some two-bit British TV presenter.

67
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:55,185
Marvin Bernstein is
a living legend!

68
00:04:55,328 --> 00:04:56,989
The man's produced some of
the best films

69
00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:58,188
in the last 20 years!

70
00:04:58,331 --> 00:05:00,299
He's a giant among
the film industry!

71
00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:02,799
- A giant?
- Maybe I should call in sick.

72
00:05:02,935 --> 00:05:04,402
Maybe that's what's
bothering you.

73
00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:05,504
That I'm not feeling well?

74
00:05:05,638 --> 00:05:07,503
No, that Marvin Bernstein
reminds you

75
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:10,200
that these celebrity profiles
are meant to pay the rent.

76
00:05:10,343 --> 00:05:12,311
While you're focusing on
your screenplays.

77
00:05:12,445 --> 00:05:14,913
Can we not talk about my
nonexistent film career right now?

78
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,777
I'm feeling small enough
as it is.

79
00:05:23,222 --> 00:05:24,780
Babies? Just remember.

80
00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:29,691
Marvin Bernstein may be a giant.
But You are a giant in waiting.

81
00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:31,694
Yes, yes I am.

82
00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:33,890
- I have no idea what that means.
- Neither do I.

83
00:05:45,845 --> 00:05:47,608
I'm here to see
Mr. Marvin Bernstein.

84
00:05:47,747 --> 00:05:49,214
- Your name?
- Peter Simon.

85
00:05:51,117 --> 00:05:53,881
Peter Simon.
Any relation to Neil?

86
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:54,577
Excuse me?

87
00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:58,088
Neil Simon! Great writer.
You a great writer?

88
00:05:58,224 --> 00:05:59,486
Oh, I don't know.

89
00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:00,990
You'd know if you were great.

90
00:06:01,828 --> 00:06:04,388
Mr Bernstein?
Kenneth Branagh on line 2.

91
00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:06,293
Kenneth Branagh!
Another great writer!

92
00:06:06,432 --> 00:06:07,490
Kenny B!

93
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:11,003
I loved the script!
I loved it!

94
00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:12,195
Fuckin' brilliant dialogue!

95
00:06:15,742 --> 00:06:17,607
Well, hat's off to
Shakespeare then!

96
00:06:17,744 --> 00:06:19,507
- No answer.
- What?

97
00:06:19,645 --> 00:06:24,378
I said no answer in
Mr. Bernstein's room.

98
00:06:26,018 --> 00:06:27,178
Oh, right.

99
00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:29,979
Fine. I'll just wait.

100
00:06:30,123 --> 00:06:31,181
Please.

101
00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:45,101
OK, ladies, arms around
each other.

102
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,604
OK, now, Jade look into
BenG's eyes, please.

103
00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:50,004
Thank you very much, OK.
No! With love.

104
00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:51,508
Pandora. How's it going?

105
00:06:51,644 --> 00:06:54,704
Oh, you know, BenG hates Jade.
Jade hates BenG.

106
00:06:54,847 --> 00:06:56,405
And Sasha hates everyone.

107
00:06:56,549 --> 00:06:57,880
Nothing like a happy set.

108
00:07:01,020 --> 00:07:02,282
Hello? I'm waiting!

109
00:07:03,222 --> 00:07:05,690
Paolo, when I have to ask for it,
it's too late!

110
00:07:07,326 --> 00:07:09,089
Who's the cutie?

111
00:07:09,529 --> 00:07:12,794
Sasha's latest squeeze.
Argentinean.

112
00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:16,390
Apparently, Sasha picked him up
at lpanema Beach.

113
00:07:16,536 --> 00:07:19,699
Amazing how Sasha always finds
his 'assistants' at the beach.

114
00:07:19,839 --> 00:07:20,806
Isn't it?

115
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:24,000
I suppose it allows him to
examine their 'qualifications'.

116
00:07:35,621 --> 00:07:36,485
Talullah? What's wrong?

117
00:07:36,622 --> 00:07:38,681
Oh God! I just had
a huge row with Freedom

118
00:07:38,825 --> 00:07:39,689
and I think it's over.

119
00:07:39,826 --> 00:07:41,589
OK, I'm in the middle of
a shoot...

120
00:07:41,727 --> 00:07:43,695
Oh God! I feel like dying!

121
00:07:43,830 --> 00:07:46,196
OK. Tell me exactly
what happened.

122
00:07:46,332 --> 00:07:48,391
Well, he came over
and we shagged.

123
00:07:48,534 --> 00:07:50,593
And then I asked him
what he thought about monogamy.

124
00:07:50,736 --> 00:07:52,897
You don't talk about monogamy
After you shag a guy...

125
00:07:53,039 --> 00:07:55,303
- No, no but he said he liked monogamy.
- He did?

126
00:07:55,441 --> 00:07:59,707
Then he said he also likes
oak and pine and maple...

127
00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:01,211
So he's got a sense of humour.

128
00:08:01,347 --> 00:08:02,609
Monogamy is not a laughing matter.

129
00:08:02,748 --> 00:08:05,273
If Freedom ever cheated on me,
I don't think I could go on!

130
00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:07,079
Talullah! You've known
the guy for a week.

131
00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:09,381
Stop talking like you're
in some kind of a movie.

132
00:08:09,522 --> 00:08:11,183
I can't help it.
I'm naturally dramatic.

133
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:12,985
Excuse me.
Sasha needs you.

134
00:08:13,125 --> 00:08:15,389
Oh, right.
I'll be right there.

135
00:08:17,230 --> 00:08:20,597
- Who is that?
- Sasha's assistant. He's gay.

136
00:08:20,733 --> 00:08:21,597
- What?
- Gay!

137
00:08:21,734 --> 00:08:23,395
- How can you tell?
- Trust me.

138
00:08:23,536 --> 00:08:24,798
I have the best gaydar
in London.

139
00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:26,598
That boy gay as a goose.

140
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:30,002
Lucky fucking geese.

141
00:08:33,246 --> 00:08:34,304
Excuse me, sir.

142
00:08:34,447 --> 00:08:37,883
We've just got word Mr. Bernstein
had to fly back to New York.

143
00:08:39,018 --> 00:08:41,384
Oh, right. Thank you.

144
00:08:54,634 --> 00:08:56,397
I'm so sorry!

145
00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:57,798
I'm so sorry.

146
00:09:03,743 --> 00:09:05,404
Now you love her!
Feed a grape.

147
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,604
With love! Real love!
Excellent!

148
00:09:07,747 --> 00:09:09,214
And crush a grape on her mouth.

149
00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:12,482
Excellent!
Make it sexy! More sexy!

150
00:09:12,618 --> 00:09:13,778
Make the grape sexy!

151
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:17,083
Yes! Yes! And kiss her.
On the mouth.

152
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:20,681
Excellent! Sexy love!
Yeah, I think we have it!

153
00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:31,099
Jacks, would it be all right
if I borrowed an outfitjust for tonight?

154
00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:32,397
I kind of have a date.

155
00:09:32,538 --> 00:09:34,802
- A date? With who?
- Oh, just this guy.

156
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:36,499
I mean, I'm not sure
it's even technically a date.

157
00:09:36,642 --> 00:09:37,506
It's just dinner.

158
00:09:37,643 --> 00:09:40,908
Pandora. Pick out the sexiest
outfit and go home immediately!

159
00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:43,311
- But what about the wrap?
- I'll cover for you!

160
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,781
What's more important?
True love or fashion?

161
00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:45,884
It's just a dinner...

162
00:09:46,018 --> 00:09:46,882
OK. Let me rephrase that.

163
00:09:47,019 --> 00:09:49,180
What's more important,
anything or fashion?

164
00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:50,289
Thanks, Jacks.

165
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:52,481
Paolo, querido.

166
00:09:52,625 --> 00:09:54,593
Dinner, 9 o'clock, Nobu.
Don't be late.

167
00:09:54,727 --> 00:09:55,989
I can't face them on my own.

168
00:09:56,128 --> 00:09:58,096
- No problem.
- Gracias, carino!

169
00:10:03,035 --> 00:10:05,094
Katie from Purple will be
picking these up in the morning.

170
00:10:05,237 --> 00:10:06,295
Alright.

171
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:10,099
James!

172
00:10:13,245 --> 00:10:14,303
How was your day?

173
00:10:24,824 --> 00:10:26,883
- Anybody home?
- In here!

174
00:10:27,026 --> 00:10:29,392
So how'd it go with
the legendary giant?

175
00:10:29,829 --> 00:10:32,195
- It didn't. He stood me up.
- I'm sorry, Babies.

176
00:10:32,331 --> 00:10:33,696
Why are you reading
a cookbook in the nude?

177
00:10:33,833 --> 00:10:34,891
It's 'The Naked Chef.'

178
00:10:35,034 --> 00:10:37,400
- What? You're keeping him company?
- I'm waiting for the shower.

179
00:10:37,536 --> 00:10:39,800
You're almost out of shampoo
so I had to use soap.

180
00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:43,704
- Oh hi, Peter.
- Hello, James. How are you?

181
00:10:43,843 --> 00:10:47,210
- Good, yes. You?
- Yes, good. Thanks.

182
00:10:49,048 --> 00:10:50,276
Well, I better be off.

183
00:10:51,017 --> 00:10:53,076
My flight's at 9
and I've still got to pack.

184
00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:55,178
Right.

185
00:10:55,921 --> 00:10:57,684
- I'll call you when I land.
- Have fun in New York!

186
00:10:57,823 --> 00:10:58,790
Thank you.

187
00:10:58,924 --> 00:11:00,585
- Bye, Peter.
- Bye, James.

188
00:11:08,734 --> 00:11:09,792
Jacks?

189
00:11:11,737 --> 00:11:12,897
What are you doing?

190
00:11:13,039 --> 00:11:15,507
Reading this delicious recipe
for Beetroot Salad

191
00:11:15,641 --> 00:11:17,506
with marjoram
and balsamic vinegar dressing!

192
00:11:17,643 --> 00:11:20,009
- What are you doing with James?
- Nothing.

193
00:11:20,146 --> 00:11:22,011
You broke up with him
a month ago!

194
00:11:22,148 --> 00:11:24,480
I know, it's just sex.
He fills a void.

195
00:11:24,617 --> 00:11:25,379
Literally.

196
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:26,985
I don't see how you expect
to meet someone new

197
00:11:27,119 --> 00:11:28,984
if you spend all your time
with your ex.

198
00:11:29,121 --> 00:11:30,179
Good point!

199
00:11:30,322 --> 00:11:31,687
Maybe I should get back
together with James

200
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:33,485
so I spend less time with him.

201
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:35,693
I don't think it's funny.

202
00:11:35,828 --> 00:11:36,988
Neither do I.

203
00:11:37,129 --> 00:11:39,393
What's the point of shagging
someone ad nauseam

204
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:40,794
if you know you're never
going to love them?

205
00:11:40,933 --> 00:11:42,093
It's not so simple.

206
00:11:42,234 --> 00:11:44,600
He's in love with you, Jacks.
You're not in love with him.

207
00:11:44,737 --> 00:11:45,795
It doesn't get more simple than that.

208
00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:49,101
That's not fair! I happen to
care about James. A lot.

209
00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:51,209
And I hate the fact
that he feels more than me.

210
00:11:51,343 --> 00:11:53,208
And I hate the fact
that I'm not in love with him.

211
00:11:53,345 --> 00:11:54,607
Because I know I should be.

212
00:11:54,747 --> 00:11:57,375
Because he's smart and sweet
and decent

213
00:11:57,516 --> 00:11:59,074
and I don't want to hurt him.

214
00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:01,277
So I keep hoping that
I'll grow into it.

215
00:12:01,420 --> 00:12:04,184
That maybe one day
I'll wake up and I'll feel...

216
00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:06,291
- What?
- In love!

217
00:12:06,425 --> 00:12:08,791
You know, dizzy and
feverish and nauseous...

218
00:12:08,928 --> 00:12:10,486
That's not love, Jacks.
That's the flu.

219
00:12:10,629 --> 00:12:12,494
Well, at least I'm trying!
You big cynic.

220
00:12:12,631 --> 00:12:13,791
I'm not a cynic!

221
00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:15,696
When's the last time you even
considered falling in love?

222
00:12:15,835 --> 00:12:16,995
Today!

223
00:12:17,136 --> 00:12:20,003
I'm not talking about some
character in a novel or a movie.

224
00:12:20,139 --> 00:12:21,197
Neither am I.

225
00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:25,006
- What?
- What?

226
00:12:25,144 --> 00:12:27,203
What? Peter!

227
00:12:27,947 --> 00:12:29,812
So, tell me everything!
What's his name?

228
00:12:30,516 --> 00:12:31,881
David Williams.

229
00:12:32,017 --> 00:12:35,475
- David Williams, and?
- And what?

230
00:12:35,621 --> 00:12:39,079
And, who is he?
Where'd you meet him?

231
00:12:39,225 --> 00:12:40,886
How'd you meet?
Tell me everything!

232
00:12:42,328 --> 00:12:43,386
Well...

233
00:12:43,529 --> 00:12:46,191
I was on my way out of the hotel.
And he was walking in.

234
00:12:47,733 --> 00:12:50,395
He had these two paintings under his arm
and a Sotheby's catalogue

235
00:12:50,536 --> 00:12:53,505
and we just sort of bumped
into each other.

236
00:12:53,639 --> 00:12:55,402
I can't explain it, but...

237
00:12:56,842 --> 00:12:58,002
It was amazing.

238
00:12:58,144 --> 00:13:01,511
Because it was like I was
finally seeing the person.

239
00:13:01,647 --> 00:13:03,979
I'd been waiting for
my entire life.

240
00:13:05,518 --> 00:13:08,078
Oh my God!
That's so romantic!

241
00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,590
So when do I get to meet him?

242
00:13:13,526 --> 00:13:14,788
Right after I do?

243
00:13:15,728 --> 00:13:17,286
- What?
- Well... We didn't actually meet.

244
00:13:17,429 --> 00:13:19,090
Per se. As it were...

245
00:13:19,532 --> 00:13:21,397
But you know his name.

246
00:13:21,534 --> 00:13:23,798
Yes, it was on
the Sotheby's catalogue.

247
00:13:24,937 --> 00:13:26,802
He dropped it
and I picked it up.

248
00:13:28,340 --> 00:13:30,103
And you didn't say anything?

249
00:13:31,043 --> 00:13:32,203
You didn't speak?

250
00:13:40,519 --> 00:13:43,181
And this is the person you
think you could be in love with?

251
00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:46,189
Someone that you've never
even spoken to?

252
00:13:46,325 --> 00:13:47,383
Someone that you've
never even met?

253
00:13:47,526 --> 00:13:49,391
Look, Jacks, I know
it sounds crazy.

254
00:13:49,528 --> 00:13:50,995
I just...

255
00:13:51,931 --> 00:13:53,990
I really think he's the one.

256
00:13:56,135 --> 00:13:57,500
Of course he is...

257
00:14:08,547 --> 00:14:09,707
I don't think I can face this.

258
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,374
Of course you can!
We're here to support Finlay!

259
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,076
Besides, you can't stay
at home every night,

260
00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:16,279
pining for someone
you've never even met!

261
00:14:16,422 --> 00:14:17,480
Thank you.

262
00:14:28,334 --> 00:14:30,996
I thought this whole dead
animal thing was 10 years ago.

263
00:14:31,136 --> 00:14:32,899
In formaldehyde, yes.

264
00:14:33,038 --> 00:14:35,199
But Finlay says this stuff
isn't preserved.

265
00:14:35,341 --> 00:14:38,105
- It rots right in front of your eyes!
- Nice!

266
00:14:38,844 --> 00:14:42,007
Where is Fin anyway?
Say our hellos before I turn vegan.

267
00:14:43,249 --> 00:14:44,375
Hello? Hello.

268
00:14:44,516 --> 00:14:47,178
I'm Finlay McMillan
and I would like to

269
00:14:47,319 --> 00:14:49,879
welcome all of you
to Unicorn & Gallagher's

270
00:14:50,022 --> 00:14:51,080
LIFE IS DEATH exhibit.

271
00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:53,885
Freedom, get me a glass of champagne.
My throat's parched.

272
00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:55,794
Do I look like a slave?

273
00:14:55,928 --> 00:14:57,691
Before I introduce
the artist himself,

274
00:14:57,830 --> 00:15:02,494
Talullah Wentworth has very kindly
agreed to read one of her poems.

275
00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:04,000
Talullah Wentworth!

276
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,104
God help us!

277
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,107
I think it's sweet.
Talullah wanting to be Sylvia Plath.

278
00:15:11,243 --> 00:15:13,302
Well, she should fast forward
and find an oven.

279
00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:15,714
Thank you, Finlay.

280
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:21,582
And thank you Unicorn for
this truly moving exhibit!

281
00:15:22,421 --> 00:15:26,687
I'd like to dedicate this poem
to Finlay's lover

282
00:15:26,825 --> 00:15:29,487
and my best friend,
Troy Johnson,

283
00:15:29,628 --> 00:15:31,687
who's birthday it is today!

284
00:15:32,831 --> 00:15:35,095
Troy would have loved
to come tonight,

285
00:15:35,234 --> 00:15:38,499
but thanks to the conspiracy
of silence

286
00:15:38,637 --> 00:15:41,003
between the Catholic Church
and the Tories

287
00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:43,506
in the face of Aids, he can't.

288
00:15:43,642 --> 00:15:45,610
Because he's dead.

289
00:15:45,744 --> 00:15:48,611
- I'm not drunk enough for this.
- Neither is Finlay.

290
00:15:51,517 --> 00:15:52,575
MEAT.

291
00:15:53,919 --> 00:15:58,583
Big black dick
in nice soft chick.

292
00:15:58,724 --> 00:16:01,386
I never knew
the thrill I'd feel,

293
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:04,189
knowing how you had to steal.

294
00:16:04,330 --> 00:16:07,493
You dangled your worm,
I took the bait.

295
00:16:07,633 --> 00:16:10,693
This fish is caught.
It's only fate.

296
00:16:11,437 --> 00:16:16,602
DIE DIE DIE
White lmperialist Pigs.

297
00:16:16,742 --> 00:16:20,405
Aristocracy is pale and weak.

298
00:16:20,546 --> 00:16:23,208
You can't kill my love.

299
00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:27,183
He's black.
He's MEAT.

300
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,496
Jacks! What are you doing here?

301
00:16:42,634 --> 00:16:45,603
I just came back to
make sure you're OK.

302
00:16:45,738 --> 00:16:47,899
- I'm fine. Sure.
- Yeah?

303
00:16:48,741 --> 00:16:50,208
Yeah! Absolutely.

304
00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:54,608
I just hate this day,
you know?

305
00:16:54,747 --> 00:16:56,009
10 years.

306
00:16:56,915 --> 00:16:58,576
How come I still miss
him so much?

307
00:16:58,717 --> 00:17:01,379
Because you are an amazing
human being.

308
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:03,988
And because he was
an amazing human being.

309
00:17:04,123 --> 00:17:06,489
And because I'm a silly
old queen.

310
00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:07,683
That too.

311
00:17:09,428 --> 00:17:11,692
- Thanks, Jacks.
- For what?

312
00:17:11,830 --> 00:17:13,297
For always remembering.

313
00:17:13,432 --> 00:17:15,593
And for being there for me.
For all of us.

314
00:17:15,734 --> 00:17:18,294
I'm a superficial assistant
at a major fashion magazine.

315
00:17:18,437 --> 00:17:20,200
You'll ruin my reputation.

316
00:17:20,339 --> 00:17:21,897
Come on.
I'll give you a ride home.

317
00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:23,099
Besides, I need your help
with Peter.

318
00:17:23,242 --> 00:17:24,709
He's fallen madly in love.

319
00:17:24,843 --> 00:17:27,209
- Yeah? With who?
- I don't know. Neither does he.

320
00:17:27,346 --> 00:17:28,404
Right!

321
00:17:30,015 --> 00:17:32,483
Speaking of boyfriends,
how's what's his name?

322
00:17:32,618 --> 00:17:34,176
- You mean Freedom?
- Freedom.

323
00:17:34,319 --> 00:17:36,583
- What kind of name is Freedom?
- Jamaican, darling.

324
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,589
- Why didn't he come to brunch?
- We had a row about his car.

325
00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:41,488
I told him I don't generally
get into vehicles

326
00:17:41,627 --> 00:17:43,094
that cost less than my handbag.

327
00:17:43,228 --> 00:17:44,991
And he accused me of
being a spoiled bitch

328
00:17:45,130 --> 00:17:46,995
who's only in love
with his skin color.

329
00:17:47,132 --> 00:17:48,599
Which is surprisingly
insightful for someone

330
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:50,599
who's stoned 24 hours a day.

331
00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:53,899
- Oh, and the creep keeps calling.
- What creep?

332
00:17:54,039 --> 00:17:56,405
From the phone company.
His name's Tony.

333
00:17:56,542 --> 00:17:59,306
He calls me 5 times a day
begging me to go out with him.

334
00:17:59,445 --> 00:18:01,413
Apparently my voice haunts him.

335
00:18:01,547 --> 00:18:03,981
You have an obscene caller
from British Telecom?

336
00:18:04,116 --> 00:18:06,277
I told her she should
report him to the police.

337
00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:10,184
I would, but he promised me
free broadband.

338
00:18:10,322 --> 00:18:11,880
- What is broadband?
- Hi, guys, sorry I'm late.

339
00:18:12,024 --> 00:18:13,491
- Hi, Fin. How are you?
- Hello, darling!

340
00:18:13,625 --> 00:18:15,183
Hi, just a cappuccino please.

341
00:18:15,327 --> 00:18:17,295
So, I made a few calls
and I'm pretty certain

342
00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:18,191
it's who I thought.

343
00:18:18,330 --> 00:18:19,092
Are you serious?

344
00:18:19,231 --> 00:18:21,995
Well, he was definitely at
the Chancery Hotel last Monday.

345
00:18:22,134 --> 00:18:23,795
- Oh, my God!
- What are we talking about?

346
00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:25,301
Finlay's figured out
who Peter fell in love

347
00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:26,096
with last week.

348
00:18:26,238 --> 00:18:28,900
He was at the Chancery Hotel,
monday morning, seeing a client!

349
00:18:29,041 --> 00:18:30,508
- Who was?
- David Williams!

350
00:18:30,642 --> 00:18:33,008
- You know the guy I bumped into?
- I know David!

351
00:18:33,145 --> 00:18:34,510
I love biblical names.

352
00:18:34,646 --> 00:18:36,978
I used to have a cat
named David. King David!

353
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,380
- What's he like?
- He's dead, fell out of a tree.

354
00:18:39,518 --> 00:18:41,486
He's head of Sotheby's
Contemporary Art Department.

355
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:44,987
He's smart, charming, kind.
Attractive, as you know.

356
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:46,887
All the rich ladies
have crushes on him!

357
00:18:47,025 --> 00:18:48,492
During his auctions,
they all try and outbid

358
00:18:48,627 --> 00:18:49,594
each otherjust to impress him!

359
00:18:49,728 --> 00:18:51,389
I bet my Mother's one of
those rich old women.

360
00:18:51,530 --> 00:18:52,792
- Is he gay?
- He's gay!

361
00:18:52,931 --> 00:18:53,795
So was my cat.

362
00:18:53,932 --> 00:18:56,492
Actually, I can't believe
I haven't tried to fix you up ages ago.

363
00:18:56,635 --> 00:18:57,602
He's perfect for you!

364
00:18:57,736 --> 00:19:00,204
And he was very intrigued by
what I told him.

365
00:19:00,339 --> 00:19:02,398
What you told him?
What did you tell him?

366
00:19:02,541 --> 00:19:03,599
Nothing.

367
00:19:05,744 --> 00:19:06,608
OK, everything.

368
00:19:06,745 --> 00:19:08,007
- But he was really flattered.
- Oh God!

369
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:10,081
- There's no way I can meet him now.
- What? Why not?

370
00:19:10,215 --> 00:19:11,273
Because it's too set up!

371
00:19:11,416 --> 00:19:13,577
There's no way he'll be
into me knowing I'm so into him.

372
00:19:13,719 --> 00:19:15,482
David's not like that!
Trust me!

373
00:19:15,621 --> 00:19:17,179
I have to agree with Peter.

374
00:19:17,322 --> 00:19:19,187
I think accidental meets
are much better.

375
00:19:19,324 --> 00:19:22,088
Take me and Freedom.
We met in a launderette.

376
00:19:22,227 --> 00:19:24,695
After I told you
he was going to be there!

377
00:19:25,731 --> 00:19:28,097
Which isn't to say
accidents can't be planned.

378
00:19:43,815 --> 00:19:44,975
Are you OK?

379
00:19:45,817 --> 00:19:46,875
I'm fine.

380
00:19:47,219 --> 00:19:49,278
I'm always like this
when I have to see my mother.

381
00:19:49,421 --> 00:19:50,786
Would you rather not go?

382
00:19:51,723 --> 00:19:53,190
No, don't be silly!

383
00:19:53,325 --> 00:19:54,986
This is your big night!

384
00:19:55,127 --> 00:19:57,994
Besides Mother loves you.
She loves this David.

385
00:19:58,130 --> 00:20:01,293
Her theme song is
'Matchmaker, Matchmaker.'

386
00:20:03,435 --> 00:20:06,700
Do you want a brownie?
I made them myself.

387
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:08,998
Thank you.

388
00:20:11,243 --> 00:20:12,608
These are very good.

389
00:20:12,744 --> 00:20:15,008
Yes, they've got quite
a lot of hash in them.

390
00:20:19,918 --> 00:20:21,283
Talullah! What's wrong?

391
00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:25,190
Freedom's having an affair.

392
00:20:25,324 --> 00:20:27,690
An affair?
You've only been going out for 2 weeks!

393
00:20:27,826 --> 00:20:29,384
Who's he having an affair with?

394
00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:33,289
Me, I just found out
he's married.

395
00:20:48,747 --> 00:20:51,477
- Are you OK?
- Oh! Yes, fine.

396
00:20:51,617 --> 00:20:55,178
I just lost my keys
and they're playing hard to get.

397
00:20:56,221 --> 00:20:57,279
Tada!

398
00:20:57,422 --> 00:21:00,289
We haven't met properly.
I'm Paolo Sarmiento by the way.

399
00:21:00,425 --> 00:21:01,483
Emily Jackson.

400
00:21:01,627 --> 00:21:03,595
But all my friends
just call me 'Jacks.'

401
00:21:03,729 --> 00:21:06,892
OK. All my friends
just call me Paolo.

402
00:21:08,033 --> 00:21:09,091
OK.

403
00:21:09,234 --> 00:21:11,293
You look very beautiful.

404
00:21:12,838 --> 00:21:15,898
Oh! Well, I'm going to this
black tie thing for my roommate.

405
00:21:16,041 --> 00:21:18,009
Well, it's not exactly
for my roommate.

406
00:21:18,143 --> 00:21:20,703
But... I mean, thanks.

407
00:21:22,147 --> 00:21:23,205
Take care.

408
00:21:23,515 --> 00:21:24,777
Can I give you a lift?

409
00:21:24,916 --> 00:21:26,076
Oh! That's OK.

410
00:21:26,218 --> 00:21:27,879
I have to meet Sasha
in Bloomsbury so...

411
00:21:28,020 --> 00:21:29,180
That's where I'm headed!

412
00:21:29,821 --> 00:21:31,083
OK.

413
00:21:31,323 --> 00:21:32,984
- Get in!
- Thank you.

414
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:44,295
Oh, Talullah! There you are!

415
00:21:44,436 --> 00:21:46,404
This is Klaus Fassbinder.

416
00:21:46,538 --> 00:21:48,301
Klaus, this is
my daughter Talullah.

417
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:49,907
And this is her best friend, Paul.

418
00:21:50,042 --> 00:21:52,306
- It's Peter, Mother!
- It's all right.

419
00:21:52,444 --> 00:21:55,004
Darling, you could have
worn something nicer.

420
00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:57,274
You could have worn something.
Full stop.

421
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:01,878
Sorry, Fassbinder, are you
related to the director?

422
00:22:02,020 --> 00:22:05,080
- Who?
- Oh, never mind.

423
00:22:05,223 --> 00:22:07,487
Mrs. Wentworth, thank you
so much for this invitation.

424
00:22:07,626 --> 00:22:09,890
Oh please! Call me Felicity!

425
00:22:10,028 --> 00:22:11,586
David is perfect
for you, darling!

426
00:22:11,730 --> 00:22:14,699
I can't think why I didn't
set you two up earlier!

427
00:22:14,833 --> 00:22:17,199
So, you're Felicity's daughter?

428
00:22:17,336 --> 00:22:19,497
Only by birth.
So don't hold it against me.

429
00:22:19,638 --> 00:22:21,697
Donatella!
Excuse me.

430
00:22:24,743 --> 00:22:27,803
Whoever designed those heels
must really hate women.

431
00:22:28,447 --> 00:22:30,381
I designed those heels.

432
00:22:31,216 --> 00:22:32,774
And thank goodness you did!

433
00:22:32,918 --> 00:22:35,887
Otherwise Mother's arse
would be dusting the floor.

434
00:22:41,426 --> 00:22:43,894
So how long have you
and Sasha been together?

435
00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:44,893
3 months.

436
00:22:45,030 --> 00:22:46,895
Really?
How did you two meet?

437
00:22:48,033 --> 00:22:51,491
- It's a bit embarrassing actually.
- Oh go on. Tell me.

438
00:22:52,637 --> 00:22:55,003
We met at a beach party
at lpanema.

439
00:22:56,742 --> 00:22:59,609
Sasha wanted to take my picture.
I said no.

440
00:22:59,745 --> 00:23:01,804
He pestered me.
And one thing led to another.

441
00:23:01,947 --> 00:23:03,107
And...

442
00:23:04,015 --> 00:23:05,277
Well, here I am.

443
00:23:05,417 --> 00:23:07,476
Sasha's a wonderful photographer.

444
00:23:07,619 --> 00:23:08,984
Yes. So everyone says.

445
00:23:09,121 --> 00:23:10,884
You're not interested in
photography?

446
00:23:11,022 --> 00:23:14,389
Oh, very much.
I studied it at university.

447
00:23:14,526 --> 00:23:18,292
But I'm more into reportage.
Capturing real moments.

448
00:23:18,430 --> 00:23:20,295
Sasha's brilliant at capturing
real moments.

449
00:23:20,432 --> 00:23:21,490
Don't you think?

450
00:23:22,834 --> 00:23:24,096
Not really.

451
00:23:24,236 --> 00:23:27,399
I think Sasha's brilliant
at creating moments.

452
00:23:27,539 --> 00:23:29,097
Most of which aren't real.

453
00:23:29,241 --> 00:23:31,004
But then again,
fashion isn't real,

454
00:23:31,143 --> 00:23:34,010
so maybe he's capturing
reality after all.

455
00:23:34,146 --> 00:23:35,113
What do you think?

456
00:23:37,516 --> 00:23:40,383
I think people shouldn't bite
the hand that feeds them.

457
00:23:41,219 --> 00:23:42,777
Excuse me?

458
00:23:42,921 --> 00:23:46,084
I mean, thanks to a chance
encounter at a beach party,

459
00:23:46,224 --> 00:23:49,091
you hook up with one of
the world's top fashion photographers.

460
00:23:49,227 --> 00:23:51,286
First class travel,
exotic locations.

461
00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:53,694
You really hit quite the jackpot.

462
00:23:53,832 --> 00:23:54,992
You think that's why I'm with him?

463
00:23:55,133 --> 00:23:57,795
Well, it's obviously not
out of respect for his work.

464
00:23:58,537 --> 00:24:00,505
Do you always judge people
so quickly?

465
00:24:00,639 --> 00:24:01,606
I'm notjudging you.

466
00:24:01,740 --> 00:24:02,707
No?

467
00:24:02,841 --> 00:24:04,706
Then maybe you're judging Sasha.

468
00:24:04,843 --> 00:24:06,003
You seem to think
the only reason

469
00:24:06,144 --> 00:24:08,704
someone might be with him is
for this 'jackpot.'

470
00:24:12,417 --> 00:24:13,475
This is fine.

471
00:24:18,824 --> 00:24:19,882
Thanks for the ride.

472
00:24:27,132 --> 00:24:30,590
I would like to welcome you
all to this year's

473
00:24:30,735 --> 00:24:34,603
'Fashion Against the lmpending
Threat of Global Warming.'

474
00:24:37,843 --> 00:24:42,212
There is nothing more important
right now, than global poverty.

475
00:24:42,347 --> 00:24:45,874
I mean in the warming sense.

476
00:24:46,017 --> 00:24:48,485
Actually, I was just talking
to Donatella.

477
00:24:49,221 --> 00:24:52,190
- Sorry, I'm late. So is he here?
- Not yet.

478
00:24:52,324 --> 00:24:53,985
- Where's Talullah?
- In the bathroom.

479
00:24:54,125 --> 00:24:56,389
She's been eating large
quantities of hash brownies.

480
00:24:56,528 --> 00:24:57,495
- Again?
- Yeah.

481
00:24:57,629 --> 00:25:01,793
So with no further ado,
I would like to introduce

482
00:25:01,933 --> 00:25:03,798
any available
British celebrity!

483
00:25:05,537 --> 00:25:08,995
I mean...
Angus Deaton!

484
00:25:20,619 --> 00:25:22,587
- Bitch!
- Wanker!

485
00:25:22,721 --> 00:25:24,985
Thank you and thank you
to Felicity for all her.

486
00:25:25,123 --> 00:25:29,685
Jacks! You look so pretty!

487
00:25:29,828 --> 00:25:32,888
I think you're very,
very pretty Jacks.

488
00:25:33,031 --> 00:25:34,396
Thank you, Talullah.

489
00:25:34,533 --> 00:25:36,296
I think you're very pretty too.

490
00:25:36,434 --> 00:25:38,994
But not as pretty as
Freedom's wife!

491
00:25:39,137 --> 00:25:41,196
I'm sure you're far prettier
than Freedom's wife.

492
00:25:41,339 --> 00:25:43,705
You're just saying that
because you're a POOF!

493
00:25:43,842 --> 00:25:45,810
Talullah!
What's wrong with you?

494
00:25:45,944 --> 00:25:47,104
Genetics.

495
00:25:48,246 --> 00:25:50,874
- Hello, Jones.
- It's Jacks, Mother!

496
00:25:51,016 --> 00:25:54,281
- You look lovely!
- Thank you. So do you!

497
00:25:54,419 --> 00:25:55,477
I don't!

498
00:25:55,620 --> 00:25:57,281
I'm pasty white.

499
00:25:58,723 --> 00:26:00,691
Why wasn't I born black?

500
00:26:01,126 --> 00:26:03,686
OK, first up then
we have an outfit called

501
00:26:03,828 --> 00:26:07,696
Ice Dream donated by
Klaus Fassbinder!

502
00:26:10,135 --> 00:26:13,502
Let's start the bidding.
If you would at 1,000 pounds.

503
00:26:13,638 --> 00:26:14,297
Thank you, sir.

504
00:26:14,439 --> 00:26:16,805
David's flight from New York
must have been delayed.

505
00:26:16,942 --> 00:26:19,001
But he should be here
at any minute.

506
00:26:19,945 --> 00:26:22,004
He was very intrigued by
what I told him!

507
00:26:22,147 --> 00:26:23,774
What, what you told him?

508
00:26:23,915 --> 00:26:25,678
You know, about how you saw
him at the hotel

509
00:26:25,817 --> 00:26:28,786
and it was love at first sight!
And what a catch you are.

510
00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:31,889
How it's about time you found
yourself a nice boyfriend!

511
00:26:33,725 --> 00:26:35,090
You told him all that?

512
00:26:35,927 --> 00:26:38,293
He seemed very flattered Paul!

513
00:26:38,430 --> 00:26:40,091
1,500 pounds.

514
00:26:40,231 --> 00:26:44,292
Any advance on 1,500 pounds?

515
00:26:44,436 --> 00:26:47,303
Going once, going twice...

516
00:26:47,439 --> 00:26:49,907
10,000 pounds!

517
00:26:51,643 --> 00:26:55,409
10,000 pounds!

518
00:26:55,547 --> 00:26:56,980
Don't touch the dress!

519
00:26:58,416 --> 00:27:00,577
Any advance on 10,000 pounds.

520
00:27:01,219 --> 00:27:02,481
No?

521
00:27:02,621 --> 00:27:04,987
Going once. Going twice!

522
00:27:06,124 --> 00:27:07,489
10,000 pounds!

523
00:27:13,732 --> 00:27:16,599
I was only joking.
I was just kidding!

524
00:27:17,936 --> 00:27:22,396
I was only joking.
It was a joke.

525
00:27:23,441 --> 00:27:24,499
Charity!

526
00:27:34,619 --> 00:27:36,883
Hello?
Oh, hi James.

527
00:27:37,022 --> 00:27:39,786
- Do I live here?
- No, I live here.

528
00:27:39,924 --> 00:27:41,585
Oh, how do you do?

529
00:27:48,233 --> 00:27:50,292
Oh, Peter, I feel so bad.

530
00:27:50,435 --> 00:27:51,595
C'mon, drink this.

531
00:27:51,736 --> 00:27:52,998
No, I mean about you.

532
00:27:53,138 --> 00:27:56,596
Not getting to meet
Robbie Williams because of me.

533
00:27:56,741 --> 00:27:57,799
It's OK.

534
00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:12,681
<i>#I'm loving angels instead...</i>

535
00:28:12,824 --> 00:28:14,985
- How's our patient?
- She'll live.

536
00:28:15,126 --> 00:28:18,186
- Well, I have great news!
- Oh yes, what?

537
00:28:18,329 --> 00:28:21,196
- You know James is in New York.
- Yes, that is great news.

538
00:28:21,332 --> 00:28:24,790
Who guess he ran into at one of
the Art Auctions over there.

539
00:28:25,537 --> 00:28:28,199
- Who?
- David Williams!

540
00:28:28,339 --> 00:28:31,103
OK! Please, please tell me
he didn't say anything!

541
00:28:31,242 --> 00:28:33,301
- Was he not meant to say anything?
- Oh, my god!

542
00:28:33,445 --> 00:28:34,810
News of my crush has just
travelled across

543
00:28:34,946 --> 00:28:36,106
the Atlantic Ocean!

544
00:28:36,247 --> 00:28:38,977
David Williams must think
I'm a needy, desperate freak!

545
00:28:39,117 --> 00:28:41,881
Well, there's no point in pretending
to be something you're not!

546
00:28:43,621 --> 00:28:44,986
Where do you think you're going?

547
00:28:45,423 --> 00:28:48,085
I just remembered.
I need a pedicure.

548
00:28:48,226 --> 00:28:52,185
Talullah. I think just this once,
you should paint your own toenails.

549
00:28:52,330 --> 00:28:53,797
Don't be ridiculous!

550
00:28:53,932 --> 00:28:57,493
I need a lot more incentive
to bend over that far.

551
00:29:02,140 --> 00:29:03,607
There's nail polish here.

552
00:29:03,742 --> 00:29:07,303
- Oh, are we at the salon?
- Yes.

553
00:29:29,033 --> 00:29:31,297
- Ready for lunch?
- Sure am!

554
00:29:31,436 --> 00:29:33,597
Is everything OK?

555
00:29:33,738 --> 00:29:36,104
Oh yeah. Fine.
T-cells unchanged.

556
00:29:36,241 --> 00:29:37,606
Liver holding up.
Everything's great.

557
00:29:37,742 --> 00:29:40,108
So despite your fragile beauty,
you're actually built like an ox.

558
00:29:40,245 --> 00:29:41,212
Go figure.

559
00:29:41,346 --> 00:29:43,109
Did you hear the news
about David?

560
00:29:43,248 --> 00:29:45,273
Yes. Talullah's Mother told me
he never even showed.

561
00:29:45,416 --> 00:29:47,179
Which actually proves
my theory he must think

562
00:29:47,318 --> 00:29:48,182
I'm a stalker freak.

563
00:29:48,319 --> 00:29:50,480
I'm sure he doesn't think that.

564
00:29:50,622 --> 00:29:53,386
Fin, in 3 short weeks he's heard
about my desperate obsession

565
00:29:53,525 --> 00:29:55,789
from you, from Talullah's mother,
and now from James,

566
00:29:55,927 --> 00:29:57,292
all the way in New York!

567
00:29:57,428 --> 00:29:58,486
Read this!

568
00:30:00,131 --> 00:30:01,996
David didn't show because
he had to stay in New York.

569
00:30:02,133 --> 00:30:05,000
Because he was promoted to
Sotheby's New York office.

570
00:30:05,136 --> 00:30:06,103
Satisfied?

571
00:30:07,539 --> 00:30:09,598
I can't believe I drove him
out the country.

572
00:30:09,741 --> 00:30:10,799
Come on.

573
00:30:20,018 --> 00:30:21,076
Jacks.

574
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:23,987
Have you ever thought
this whole 'true love' thing

575
00:30:24,122 --> 00:30:25,180
might be a conspiracy?

576
00:30:25,323 --> 00:30:27,791
- A conspiracy?
- Yeah, a capitalist conspiracy.

577
00:30:27,926 --> 00:30:31,487
A lie concocted by the Film,
Publishing and Music industries.

578
00:30:31,629 --> 00:30:34,393
All pushing this thing, this
concept that doesn't even exist!

579
00:30:34,532 --> 00:30:36,397
True love doesn't exist?

580
00:30:36,835 --> 00:30:37,802
Well, think about it.

581
00:30:37,936 --> 00:30:39,904
Where is it besides songs,
books and films?

582
00:30:40,038 --> 00:30:43,007
I mean, who can honestly say
'I will always love you? '

583
00:30:43,141 --> 00:30:45,200
- Whitney Houston?
- Yeah, when she's high on crack.

584
00:30:45,343 --> 00:30:47,709
The point is, Everyone's miserable
because they're looking for

585
00:30:47,846 --> 00:30:49,814
this nonexistent 'thing,'
or else they're miserable

586
00:30:49,948 --> 00:30:51,882
because they think they've
settled for less.

587
00:30:52,016 --> 00:30:54,484
I'm not miserable.
And I believe in true love.

588
00:30:54,619 --> 00:30:57,179
Yeah, which is why you're still
sleeping with your ex-boyfriend.

589
00:30:57,322 --> 00:30:59,586
'Breakfast at Tiffany's' is on.
Wanna watch?

590
00:30:59,724 --> 00:31:02,887
I just told you films have
destroyed my ability to love.

591
00:31:03,027 --> 00:31:04,494
I thought that was your mother.

592
00:31:05,129 --> 00:31:06,892
Good point. Shove over.

593
00:31:15,039 --> 00:31:16,700
This is your favorite film?

594
00:31:16,841 --> 00:31:18,308
Look at me. Can't you tell?

595
00:31:46,838 --> 00:31:48,203
- Where's Daphne?
- Out.

596
00:31:48,339 --> 00:31:49,897
Can I give her a message?

597
00:31:50,041 --> 00:31:52,100
These are the contact sheets
from the shoot.

598
00:31:52,243 --> 00:31:53,210
I've marked my selects.

599
00:31:53,344 --> 00:31:55,403
Tell Daphne my assistant
Paolo is handling the retouching,

600
00:31:55,546 --> 00:31:57,377
so if she needs any other prints,
she can call him at the lab.

601
00:31:57,515 --> 00:31:58,174
OK.

602
00:31:58,316 --> 00:32:01,080
And if she needs me,
I'll be at my boyfriend's in Paris.

603
00:32:01,219 --> 00:32:03,687
- Paolo?
- What about him?

604
00:32:04,122 --> 00:32:05,885
Paolo isn't your boyfriend?

605
00:32:06,024 --> 00:32:08,686
Why would you think
he was my boyfriend?

606
00:32:08,826 --> 00:32:11,488
I just assumed.
Talking to Paolo.

607
00:32:11,629 --> 00:32:13,392
- Really?
- I'm sorry.

608
00:32:14,332 --> 00:32:16,095
No need to be sorry, carino!

609
00:32:16,234 --> 00:32:18,998
You're not the first person
who gets this impression from Paolo.

610
00:32:19,137 --> 00:32:22,698
To be honest, I think maybe
he had a little crush on me.

611
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:26,799
I'm very flattered of course,
and if I wasn't already involved.

612
00:32:26,945 --> 00:32:28,606
But, you know,
it's all about timing, no?

613
00:32:28,746 --> 00:32:31,681
And right now, I have a train
to catch! Ciao ciao!

614
00:32:34,419 --> 00:32:35,886
Ciao, ciao.

615
00:32:45,930 --> 00:32:47,591
These look great.

616
00:32:47,732 --> 00:32:48,892
Paolo.

617
00:32:50,335 --> 00:32:52,599
Look, I'm sorry about
the other night.

618
00:32:52,737 --> 00:32:55,797
Sasha told me everything
and I feel like an idiot.

619
00:32:56,741 --> 00:32:58,299
Could you please forgive me?

620
00:32:59,944 --> 00:33:01,002
Yes.

621
00:33:01,646 --> 00:33:02,510
You don't know me.

622
00:33:02,647 --> 00:33:04,877
If you did, you'd know
I'd never take advantage of Sasha.

623
00:33:05,817 --> 00:33:07,079
Anyway. I should go.

624
00:33:07,919 --> 00:33:08,977
Have a good weekend.

625
00:33:10,421 --> 00:33:11,479
You, too.

626
00:33:21,332 --> 00:33:24,301
- So how do I get to know you?
- What?

627
00:33:24,435 --> 00:33:26,995
- How about over a cup of coffee?
- A cup of coffee?

628
00:33:27,138 --> 00:33:28,696
It's the least I could do
after the other day!

629
00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:32,105
Besides, we can't have you all
alone in London on a Friday night!

630
00:33:32,243 --> 00:33:34,006
You make me sound like
an exchange student.

631
00:33:34,145 --> 00:33:36,113
- I didn't mean it like that.
- No?

632
00:33:36,247 --> 00:33:39,375
Then why else would someone like
you want to have a coffee with me?

633
00:33:39,517 --> 00:33:40,575
Someone like me?

634
00:33:40,718 --> 00:33:42,879
It's OK. Really.
I forgive you.

635
00:33:43,021 --> 00:33:46,582
So you can stop feeling sorry
for me or guilty or whatever.

636
00:33:46,724 --> 00:33:48,885
I'm sure you have better things
to do on a Friday night.

637
00:33:51,729 --> 00:33:56,189
Actually, 'someone like me' has
nothing to do on a Friday night. OK?

638
00:33:56,334 --> 00:33:59,303
Oh, but wait, now you're going to
say 'someone like me'

639
00:33:59,437 --> 00:34:02,998
only wants to have
coffee with you

640
00:34:03,141 --> 00:34:05,701
because I've got nothing
better to do.

641
00:34:05,843 --> 00:34:09,973
I just can't win can I?
Never mind.

642
00:34:10,114 --> 00:34:14,175
To tell you the truth,
'someone like me' hates coffee.

643
00:34:14,318 --> 00:34:16,183
I hate coffee too.

644
00:34:17,121 --> 00:34:18,679
Este...

645
00:34:18,823 --> 00:34:20,586
Where did you learn to
speak Spanish like that?

646
00:34:20,725 --> 00:34:23,285
What? Not what you'd expect
from 'someone like me? '

647
00:34:24,028 --> 00:34:25,393
I find you very confusing.

648
00:34:25,530 --> 00:34:28,499
So does my boyfriend.
My ex-boyfriend.

649
00:34:30,535 --> 00:34:32,002
Do you want to get a drink?

650
00:34:32,136 --> 00:34:33,603
There's this amazing place
near here.

651
00:34:33,738 --> 00:34:35,501
Tonight's South American night.

652
00:34:38,543 --> 00:34:41,910
OK. But only because I feel
sorry for myself,

653
00:34:42,046 --> 00:34:43,980
and I know you must feel guilty.

654
00:34:46,717 --> 00:34:49,481
I really appreciate you
seeing me on such short notice.

655
00:34:49,620 --> 00:34:50,985
Finlay thinks the world of you.

656
00:34:51,122 --> 00:34:53,590
And I think THE WORLD of Finlay!

657
00:34:56,828 --> 00:34:58,295
Yes, well...

658
00:34:58,429 --> 00:35:01,398
He said you really sorted him
out on the relationship front.

659
00:35:01,532 --> 00:35:03,693
And I could certainly use
some help there.

660
00:35:03,835 --> 00:35:07,498
You see I've never actually
been in a relationship

661
00:35:07,638 --> 00:35:08,798
except in my own head.

662
00:35:08,940 --> 00:35:10,407
And how long did that last?

663
00:35:11,042 --> 00:35:13,510
- What?
- The relationship in your head.

664
00:35:14,345 --> 00:35:15,903
No. I mean,
it's an ongoing problem.

665
00:35:16,047 --> 00:35:19,778
They only last in my head.
For varying amounts of time.

666
00:35:19,917 --> 00:35:21,976
So you have a problem
with monogamy?

667
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:26,786
No, no that.
No, that's not my problem.

668
00:35:26,924 --> 00:35:30,690
Denial is not a river in Egypt!

669
00:35:31,329 --> 00:35:34,787
Not a river in Egypt.
D'you see what I did there?

670
00:35:34,932 --> 00:35:38,390
Just that's a little therapistjoke.
Doesn't always work.

671
00:35:38,536 --> 00:35:40,504
- OK, right. Paul?
- Peter.

672
00:35:40,638 --> 00:35:42,196
- Sorry?
- Peter.

673
00:35:42,340 --> 00:35:45,503
Peter. Peter. Yes, it is.
You're absolutely right. Peter.

674
00:35:45,643 --> 00:35:49,010
That's a good start.
Well done you!

675
00:35:49,147 --> 00:35:50,580
I think I can help you.

676
00:35:50,715 --> 00:35:52,683
- You do?
- I do.

677
00:35:52,817 --> 00:35:55,479
I think you are stuck in
that pre relationship

678
00:35:55,620 --> 00:35:58,783
moment of infatuation
and you need to be reminded

679
00:35:58,923 --> 00:36:02,689
that a real relationship has
many, many, many more stages.

680
00:36:02,827 --> 00:36:04,590
Stages. I like that.

681
00:36:04,729 --> 00:36:09,189
Relationships are best measured
by farting.

682
00:36:10,635 --> 00:36:11,602
Excuse me?

683
00:36:11,736 --> 00:36:15,297
The stages of a relationship
can be defined by farting.

684
00:36:15,439 --> 00:36:18,306
Stage 1 is the conspiracy of silence.

685
00:36:18,442 --> 00:36:22,310
This is a fantasy period
where both parties pretend

686
00:36:22,446 --> 00:36:25,074
that they have no bodily waste.

687
00:36:25,216 --> 00:36:27,878
This illusion is very quickly
shattered by that first shy

688
00:36:28,019 --> 00:36:32,683
'ooh did you fart? ' followed by
the sheepish admission of truth.

689
00:36:32,823 --> 00:36:35,986
This heralds a period of
deeper intimacy.

690
00:36:36,127 --> 00:36:39,893
A period I like to call
the 'fart honeymoon'.

691
00:36:40,031 --> 00:36:44,092
Where both parties find each
other's gas just the cutest thing

692
00:36:44,235 --> 00:36:45,702
in the world.

693
00:36:45,836 --> 00:36:49,602
But of course no honeymoon
can last forever.

694
00:36:51,242 --> 00:36:55,201
And so we reach the critical
fork in the fart.

695
00:36:55,346 --> 00:36:58,975
Either the fart loses its power
to amuse and embarrass,

696
00:36:59,116 --> 00:37:02,483
thereby signifying
true love or else,

697
00:37:02,620 --> 00:37:06,078
it begins to annoy and disgust.

698
00:37:06,224 --> 00:37:11,287
Thereby symbolizing all
that is blocked and rancid

699
00:37:11,429 --> 00:37:12,987
in the formerly beloved.

700
00:37:13,130 --> 00:37:14,688
Do you see what I'm getting at?

701
00:37:16,033 --> 00:37:18,797
Peter? Peter?

702
00:37:18,936 --> 00:37:19,994
Earth to Peter?

703
00:37:20,137 --> 00:37:20,694
- What?
- Sorry I'm late.

704
00:37:20,838 --> 00:37:23,204
I was talking to Tony.

705
00:37:23,341 --> 00:37:24,308
Who's Tony?

706
00:37:24,442 --> 00:37:27,309
You know. Tony.
From the phone company.

707
00:37:27,445 --> 00:37:29,310
You're seeing your
obscene phone caller?

708
00:37:29,447 --> 00:37:31,176
Of course I'm not
'seeing him', darling.

709
00:37:31,315 --> 00:37:34,375
We're having a strictly
phone-based relationship.

710
00:37:34,518 --> 00:37:35,678
So what's going on?

711
00:37:36,721 --> 00:37:38,985
Finlay thinks I should
see his therapist.

712
00:37:39,123 --> 00:37:40,283
Finlay sees a therapist?

713
00:37:40,424 --> 00:37:43,188
Yeah, some woman he says is
really good with relationships.

714
00:37:43,327 --> 00:37:44,692
Maybe I should see her.

715
00:37:44,829 --> 00:37:47,798
I think I need to get in touch
with my inner child.

716
00:37:48,432 --> 00:37:50,093
Talullah, if you get in touch
with your inner child

717
00:37:50,234 --> 00:37:51,701
you're going to need
an inner nanny.

718
00:37:51,836 --> 00:37:54,396
Oh, I don't trust nannies.
They're all whores!

719
00:37:54,538 --> 00:37:56,802
- What about Mary Poppins?
- Slut!

720
00:37:56,941 --> 00:37:58,602
What are you talking about?

721
00:37:58,743 --> 00:38:00,711
She left the convent,
married Christopher Plummer,

722
00:38:00,845 --> 00:38:02,904
and then took all his children
up the Alps.

723
00:38:04,315 --> 00:38:06,579
Speaking of The Sound of Music,
where's Jacks?

724
00:38:11,922 --> 00:38:14,390
The riots completely
shut down Buenos Aires.

725
00:38:14,525 --> 00:38:16,083
It was unbelievable!

726
00:38:16,227 --> 00:38:18,593
The whole country,
rich, poor, young, old,

727
00:38:18,729 --> 00:38:20,890
everyone for this one moment,
came together.

728
00:38:21,032 --> 00:38:24,001
- These are incredible!
- The moment was incredible.

729
00:38:24,135 --> 00:38:25,898
You captured the moment.

730
00:38:26,037 --> 00:38:29,097
My friend Finlay owns an art gallery.
I'd love to show these to him.

731
00:38:29,240 --> 00:38:31,299
- That's very kind of you but...
- Very kind of me? What?

732
00:38:31,442 --> 00:38:33,103
You think you're some
kind of charity case?

733
00:38:33,244 --> 00:38:36,407
- No, but... I just...
- Don't tell me you're afraid.

734
00:38:37,415 --> 00:38:38,473
I'm afraid you're drunk.

735
00:38:38,616 --> 00:38:39,878
Because I think you're talented?

736
00:38:40,017 --> 00:38:42,577
Because you've had
3 caiperinhas.

737
00:38:44,021 --> 00:38:47,479
- Do you know how to tango?
- Yeah. Why?

738
00:38:47,625 --> 00:38:49,593
Because, everyone knows
you can't be drunk and tango.

739
00:38:49,727 --> 00:38:51,592
So if I can tango,
then I'm not drunk.

740
00:38:51,729 --> 00:38:55,392
And I get to show your pictures
to Finlay.

741
00:38:55,533 --> 00:38:57,501
Well, then you're right
and I won't tell a soul.

742
00:39:00,338 --> 00:39:01,396
Tambien...

743
00:39:29,233 --> 00:39:31,292
So about my friend Finlay.

744
00:40:09,740 --> 00:40:11,708
- So tell me your secret.
- What secret?

745
00:40:11,842 --> 00:40:14,208
How an American can speak
like a Spaniard and dance

746
00:40:14,345 --> 00:40:15,607
like an Argentinean.

747
00:40:16,647 --> 00:40:18,672
- I'm not American.
- No?

748
00:40:18,816 --> 00:40:21,979
Well, not technically.
I was born in England.

749
00:40:22,119 --> 00:40:24,679
My Father was English.
My Mother was Spanish.

750
00:40:24,822 --> 00:40:28,383
I grew up with my Mother's
family in America.

751
00:40:28,526 --> 00:40:30,391
After my parents died.

752
00:40:34,932 --> 00:40:38,197
How old were you
when you moved to America?

753
00:40:38,335 --> 00:40:39,393
Five.

754
00:40:39,537 --> 00:40:42,005
- I'm sorry I didn't mean to pry.
- It's not that.

755
00:40:42,940 --> 00:40:46,706
It's just I don't want to be
one of those awful characters

756
00:40:46,844 --> 00:40:51,474
out of a movie that gushes out
their past while the violins play.

757
00:40:52,917 --> 00:40:56,080
I mean I had a bad age five.

758
00:40:56,220 --> 00:40:58,688
I had a terrible age five,
actually.

759
00:40:59,523 --> 00:41:04,187
But all in all, since then,
my life's been pretty blessed.

760
00:41:18,042 --> 00:41:20,408
- So do you live alone?
- No, I live with Peter.

761
00:41:20,544 --> 00:41:23,479
- Oh? Your boyfriend?
- Oh God no! He's my best friend.

762
00:41:23,614 --> 00:41:26,981
We went to college together.
He's gay.

763
00:41:27,117 --> 00:41:28,584
All the good ones are...

764
00:41:31,522 --> 00:41:34,286
You should meet him actually.
He's a brilliant writer.

765
00:41:34,425 --> 00:41:36,393
Screenplays.
Well, that's the goal at least.

766
00:41:36,527 --> 00:41:39,496
He's just the sweetest,
funniest, kindest guy I know.

767
00:41:39,630 --> 00:41:41,598
If he wasn't gay, I'd have
married him years ago.

768
00:41:41,732 --> 00:41:43,597
- He sounds wonderful.
- He is!

769
00:41:45,636 --> 00:41:47,194
What are you doing tomorrow?

770
00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:50,102
Tomorrow? Nothing.

771
00:41:50,241 --> 00:41:51,503
You wanna have dinner?

772
00:41:52,243 --> 00:41:53,301
Oh, sure!

773
00:41:53,444 --> 00:41:55,605
Great!
Come over at 8!

774
00:41:58,716 --> 00:41:59,876
Ta da!

775
00:42:00,718 --> 00:42:02,686
Well, I had an amazing
time tonight.

776
00:42:02,820 --> 00:42:03,878
Me, too.

777
00:42:05,322 --> 00:42:06,380
Bye!

778
00:42:16,333 --> 00:42:18,494
<i>I've never been for a walk</i>
<i>in the morning before.</i>

779
00:42:18,636 --> 00:42:20,297
<i>At least, not since I've been</i>
<i>in New York...</i>

780
00:42:20,638 --> 00:42:21,900
- Hey, babies!
- Hi!

781
00:42:22,039 --> 00:42:24,007
- What are you doing?
- Watching 'Breakfast at Tiffany's.'

782
00:42:24,141 --> 00:42:26,006
- Again?
- Yeah, I'm doing research.

783
00:42:26,143 --> 00:42:27,508
Stop doing research
and would you write

784
00:42:27,645 --> 00:42:29,112
your goddamn screenplay!

785
00:42:29,246 --> 00:42:31,680
Did you realize, in the book,
the male character's gay?

786
00:42:31,815 --> 00:42:33,373
That's why they have such
an amazing friendship.

787
00:42:33,517 --> 00:42:35,075
Because she feels safe with him.

788
00:42:35,219 --> 00:42:38,677
Whereas in the film, he's straight
and she just wears gorgeous hats.

789
00:42:38,822 --> 00:42:42,781
Speaking of gorgeous, I just met
the cutest Argentinean boy.

790
00:42:42,927 --> 00:42:44,189
Oh, yeah?

791
00:42:44,328 --> 00:42:46,091
He's absolutely gorgeous.

792
00:42:46,230 --> 00:42:48,994
And sweet and smart.
And an amazing tango dancer!

793
00:42:49,133 --> 00:42:50,600
That's very useful
in today's world.

794
00:42:50,734 --> 00:42:53,703
Who also happens to be
an exceptionally talented photographer.

795
00:42:53,837 --> 00:42:56,499
Oh! Does this mean
we're finally over James?

796
00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:59,006
- James? He's gay!
- James is gay?!

797
00:42:59,143 --> 00:43:01,304
No, Paolo.
Paolo is gay.

798
00:43:01,445 --> 00:43:04,380
He's been assisting for Sasha,
you know the fashion photographer

799
00:43:04,515 --> 00:43:06,676
and I thought that they were,
you know, sleeping together

800
00:43:06,817 --> 00:43:07,784
but now they're not.

801
00:43:07,918 --> 00:43:10,182
And he really wants to meet you.
He doesn't know anyone in London.

802
00:43:10,321 --> 00:43:11,982
And I told him that you'd
have dinner with him...

803
00:43:12,122 --> 00:43:13,885
- What?
- Tomorrow. It'll be good for you.

804
00:43:14,024 --> 00:43:15,491
It'll take your mind off.

805
00:43:15,626 --> 00:43:18,094
Jacks! There is absolutely
no way I am going

806
00:43:18,228 --> 00:43:19,695
on another blind date.
The answer's no!

807
00:43:22,833 --> 00:43:23,993
Paolo! Hi!

808
00:43:24,134 --> 00:43:25,499
Come in! Come in!

809
00:43:26,637 --> 00:43:28,298
I'm afraid I'm running late!

810
00:43:28,439 --> 00:43:31,306
Oh, these are lovely,
but Peter hates flowers.

811
00:43:31,442 --> 00:43:32,306
We'll pretend they're for me.

812
00:43:32,443 --> 00:43:33,808
Can I get you something to drink?

813
00:43:33,944 --> 00:43:35,206
Champagne?

814
00:43:35,346 --> 00:43:36,677
Sure.

815
00:43:36,814 --> 00:43:38,281
So, how was your Saturday?

816
00:43:39,016 --> 00:43:40,074
- Paolo?
- What?

817
00:43:40,217 --> 00:43:41,980
What did you do today?

818
00:43:42,119 --> 00:43:44,280
Oh, yeah.
I went to the Tate.

819
00:43:44,421 --> 00:43:46,787
The Museum.
The Tate Modern Museum.

820
00:43:46,924 --> 00:43:48,789
- Your first time?
- Yep.

821
00:43:48,926 --> 00:43:50,484
And? What did you think?

822
00:43:50,628 --> 00:43:53,688
I mean, it's pretty
amazing visually. Right?

823
00:43:53,831 --> 00:43:55,389
The way it's built.

824
00:43:55,532 --> 00:43:58,000
Isn't itjust visually stunning?

825
00:43:58,135 --> 00:43:59,397
Don't you think, Paolo?

826
00:44:00,437 --> 00:44:01,199
Yeah!

827
00:44:01,338 --> 00:44:03,704
Paolo, I can't hear you.
Can you come back here?

828
00:44:03,841 --> 00:44:05,308
I don't want to have to scream.

829
00:44:11,915 --> 00:44:14,383
So what else did you?
After the Tate Modern?

830
00:44:14,518 --> 00:44:16,782
I'm sorry, I didn't...
I'll just close the door.

831
00:44:16,920 --> 00:44:17,682
Oh, it's fine!

832
00:44:17,821 --> 00:44:19,482
Peter and I always have
our best conversations

833
00:44:19,623 --> 00:44:20,487
when I'm in the bath.

834
00:44:20,624 --> 00:44:21,886
- Peter?
- Jacks?

835
00:44:22,026 --> 00:44:23,186
Shit!

836
00:44:23,327 --> 00:44:25,192
- Jacks!
- I'll be right out!

837
00:44:25,329 --> 00:44:27,695
- Is that Peter?
- No. James. Do me a favour.

838
00:44:27,831 --> 00:44:28,991
Go out and tell him
I'll be out in 5.

839
00:44:29,133 --> 00:44:30,498
And close the door behind you.

840
00:44:36,140 --> 00:44:38,199
Hi, sorry, I...
Jacks is in the bath.

841
00:44:38,342 --> 00:44:39,809
She says she'll be out in 5.

842
00:44:39,943 --> 00:44:41,808
- Who are you?
- Paolo Sarmiento.

843
00:44:41,945 --> 00:44:43,378
I, I work with Jacks.

844
00:44:45,115 --> 00:44:47,379
- James!
- Peter. Hi.

845
00:44:47,518 --> 00:44:50,078
- Hello?
- Hi, Peter. I'm Paolo.

846
00:44:50,220 --> 00:44:51,084
Paolo. Hi.

847
00:44:51,221 --> 00:44:53,280
Hi! I've heard so much about you.

848
00:44:53,424 --> 00:44:54,482
Really?

849
00:44:55,225 --> 00:44:58,194
- Where's, where's Jacks?
- In the bath, apparently.

850
00:44:58,328 --> 00:45:01,092
Right. Excuse me for a second?

851
00:45:10,741 --> 00:45:12,902
- What's he doing here?
- He just flew back from New York.

852
00:45:13,043 --> 00:45:14,010
Not James. Paolo!

853
00:45:14,144 --> 00:45:17,079
- He's having dinner with you.
- No! No. No way.

854
00:45:17,214 --> 00:45:18,476
Why not?
Give me one good reason.

855
00:45:18,615 --> 00:45:20,276
- It's too soon.
- Too soon?

856
00:45:20,417 --> 00:45:22,681
- I'm still not over David.
- You don't even know David.

857
00:45:22,820 --> 00:45:23,582
That's a technicality.

858
00:45:23,721 --> 00:45:25,086
Besides, after everything
everyone's said,

859
00:45:25,222 --> 00:45:26,280
I feel like I know him very well.

860
00:45:26,423 --> 00:45:28,687
Babies, David doesn't even live
in London anymore.

861
00:45:28,826 --> 00:45:29,884
Oh, so you're saying
I should forget about him

862
00:45:30,027 --> 00:45:31,085
purely for geographic reasons?

863
00:45:31,228 --> 00:45:33,093
I'm saying that I don't think
it's healthy for you to have

864
00:45:33,230 --> 00:45:34,288
a long distance relationship
with someone

865
00:45:34,431 --> 00:45:36,194
you've never even met!

866
00:45:36,333 --> 00:45:37,994
How does that look?
More blush?

867
00:45:38,135 --> 00:45:39,796
- No, you're good.
- Thank you.

868
00:45:41,638 --> 00:45:45,301
I'm afraid Jacks sort of
surprised me with this.

869
00:45:45,442 --> 00:45:47,000
Yes. She surprised me too.

870
00:45:47,144 --> 00:45:50,079
Yeah, well, that's our Jacks!
Full of surprises!

871
00:45:51,115 --> 00:45:54,676
So is James...
Are they together?

872
00:45:56,620 --> 00:45:57,587
Well, technically no.

873
00:45:57,721 --> 00:45:59,780
But for all practical purposes, yes.

874
00:45:59,923 --> 00:46:01,686
- I don't understand.
- Join the club.

875
00:46:01,825 --> 00:46:04,885
When it comes to love, Jacks is
completely incomprehensible.

876
00:46:05,529 --> 00:46:08,293
So does she love him?

877
00:46:09,733 --> 00:46:10,700
I suppose, in a way, she must.

878
00:46:10,834 --> 00:46:13,598
I just don't think
she likes him very much.

879
00:46:13,737 --> 00:46:15,500
But come to think of it,
Jacks never goes out with men

880
00:46:15,639 --> 00:46:16,901
she actually likes.

881
00:46:19,543 --> 00:46:20,407
You're insane.

882
00:46:20,544 --> 00:46:22,512
Why, because I don't like you
having strange men with you

883
00:46:22,646 --> 00:46:23,578
while you're in the bath?

884
00:46:23,714 --> 00:46:27,775
- Jams, he's gay, for God sakes!
- Great, another poof.

885
00:46:27,918 --> 00:46:29,283
Since when did you
become homophobic?

886
00:46:29,419 --> 00:46:31,979
Since I realized being gay is
the only way to be intimate with you.

887
00:46:32,122 --> 00:46:33,589
Don't be absurd.

888
00:46:36,326 --> 00:46:38,988
I can't believe I've just
vomited the entire saga of

889
00:46:39,129 --> 00:46:41,495
my imaginary love life
with David Williams.

890
00:46:41,632 --> 00:46:43,099
I enjoyed it.
It's like a movie.

891
00:46:43,233 --> 00:46:45,895
- Yeah, but you must think I'm crazy.
- Yes.

892
00:46:46,036 --> 00:46:47,594
But I like crazy people.

893
00:46:47,738 --> 00:46:50,400
Yeah? So do I.

894
00:46:53,343 --> 00:46:56,403
But enough about me.
What do you think about me?

895
00:46:57,214 --> 00:47:00,980
No, I'm joking.
No, I'm not. No, I was.

896
00:47:07,324 --> 00:47:09,690
Sam, can we have some
sambucca, please?

897
00:47:25,242 --> 00:47:26,800
- Don't answer.
- I really should.

898
00:47:26,944 --> 00:47:28,912
- Why?
- It might be somebody.

899
00:47:31,014 --> 00:47:34,780
Hello? Talullah! Oh sweetie.
Hold on a sec.

900
00:47:34,918 --> 00:47:36,886
It's Talullah.
She's having a crisis.

901
00:47:37,020 --> 00:47:38,487
How bloody unusual.

902
00:47:39,623 --> 00:47:42,888
OK. Tell me exactly
what happened.

903
00:47:43,026 --> 00:47:44,994
He's stopped calling.

904
00:47:45,128 --> 00:47:46,789
- Freedom?
- Tony.

905
00:47:46,930 --> 00:47:47,988
Who's Tony?

906
00:47:48,131 --> 00:47:51,498
You know.
Tony from the phone company.

907
00:47:51,635 --> 00:47:54,103
The psycho who was
making obscene calls?

908
00:47:54,238 --> 00:47:57,696
They weren't obscene!
They were sweet.

909
00:47:57,841 --> 00:48:00,105
It was the perfect relationship.

910
00:48:00,244 --> 00:48:04,772
I never felt ugly or fat.
I knew he wasn't with me for my money.

911
00:48:04,915 --> 00:48:07,383
- I miss him, Jacks!
- Talullah, don't be ridiculous.

912
00:48:07,517 --> 00:48:09,178
I can't help how I feel!

913
00:48:09,319 --> 00:48:11,378
Why is it as soon as
I fall in love with a man,

914
00:48:11,521 --> 00:48:13,079
he abandons me?

915
00:48:13,223 --> 00:48:15,088
You don't love Tony!

916
00:48:15,225 --> 00:48:17,989
Yes I do!
I do love Tony.

917
00:48:19,129 --> 00:48:20,289
What did I do wrong?

918
00:48:20,430 --> 00:48:23,490
OK. Let's indulge this
sick fantasy.

919
00:48:23,634 --> 00:48:26,603
What's the last thing
you said to Prince Charming?

920
00:48:26,737 --> 00:48:29,103
'Stop pestering me
or I'll call the police! '

921
00:48:35,646 --> 00:48:36,874
Oh, this is us.

922
00:48:38,415 --> 00:48:41,077
Do you want to come upstairs
for another drink?

923
00:48:41,218 --> 00:48:43,379
I want to,
but I probably shouldn't.

924
00:48:43,520 --> 00:48:45,283
I have to be at the lab at 7.

925
00:48:46,223 --> 00:48:50,785
- Oh, OK. Well...
- But I really enjoyed meeting you.

926
00:48:52,729 --> 00:48:53,787
So did I.

927
00:48:56,033 --> 00:48:57,091
So did I.

928
00:49:00,737 --> 00:49:02,796
- Are you OK here?
- Oh my God! Oh God!

929
00:49:02,940 --> 00:49:04,202
- You don't! I...
- I'm so sorry!

930
00:49:04,341 --> 00:49:06,901
I'm so sorry!
I'm so sorry. I was just...

931
00:49:07,044 --> 00:49:09,205
- I'm really embarrassed.
- No, no, no, listen, Peter.

932
00:49:09,346 --> 00:49:10,677
I really like you a lot, but...

933
00:49:10,814 --> 00:49:12,076
But you don't like me
in that way.

934
00:49:12,215 --> 00:49:13,580
Look, I know that speech.

935
00:49:13,717 --> 00:49:15,878
I use that speech because
I actually wrote that speech...

936
00:49:16,019 --> 00:49:17,486
I'm not gay.

937
00:49:17,621 --> 00:49:20,089
- I didn't write that part!
- I'm straight.

938
00:49:21,825 --> 00:49:22,883
Since when?

939
00:49:24,227 --> 00:49:27,094
I suppose I first noticed
when I was around 8.

940
00:49:27,230 --> 00:49:29,494
I thought it was just a phase,
you know, but eventually

941
00:49:29,633 --> 00:49:32,693
I had to accept the truth.
I like women.

942
00:49:34,137 --> 00:49:36,901
Oh this is good!
This is really good.

943
00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:39,099
You know, Jacks is useless at
fixing people up...

944
00:49:39,242 --> 00:49:41,301
- Jacks thought I was gay?
- Oh she sure did.

945
00:49:41,445 --> 00:49:43,777
And I'm really going to enjoy
making her feel stupid about this one.

946
00:49:43,914 --> 00:49:46,075
No! Please don't.

947
00:49:47,718 --> 00:49:49,379
I think I should tell her myself.

948
00:49:54,524 --> 00:49:55,889
You and Jacks?

949
00:49:57,227 --> 00:49:58,888
You and, you and Jacks?

950
00:49:59,629 --> 00:50:00,493
Oh my God!

951
00:50:00,630 --> 00:50:03,997
Oh, look, I... I...
I won't say a word. I promise.

952
00:50:04,134 --> 00:50:05,795
- Thanks.
- Cross my heart.

953
00:50:07,337 --> 00:50:10,602
- I should go.
- Yeah. Yes.

954
00:50:10,741 --> 00:50:12,709
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight.

955
00:50:23,320 --> 00:50:25,083
So what did you say to Jacks
when you got back?

956
00:50:25,222 --> 00:50:27,383
- Nothing, she wasn't there.
- But you're going to tell her.

957
00:50:27,524 --> 00:50:28,286
Sorry, I'm late!

958
00:50:28,425 --> 00:50:31,189
I was in the middle of
an absolutely gripping book.

959
00:50:31,328 --> 00:50:32,090
I couldn't put it down.

960
00:50:32,229 --> 00:50:33,287
Oh, what book's that?

961
00:50:33,430 --> 00:50:36,194
My memoirs, darling.
I've decided to publish.

962
00:50:37,034 --> 00:50:38,899
Bloody Mary please.
Light on the bloody.

963
00:50:39,036 --> 00:50:40,799
- Where's Jacks?
- Spending the weekend with James.

964
00:50:40,937 --> 00:50:43,303
- Oh God, how disgusting!
- Be nice.

965
00:50:43,440 --> 00:50:46,898
I'm sorry, but James Wildstone stands
for absolutely everything I despise.

966
00:50:47,044 --> 00:50:48,511
I thought he was
a good friend of your family?

967
00:50:48,645 --> 00:50:49,407
Exactly my point.

968
00:50:49,546 --> 00:50:51,173
Well, we shouldn'tjudge.
Maybe he's good sex.

969
00:50:51,314 --> 00:50:53,782
Oh, don't be absurd.
He's public school.

970
00:50:53,917 --> 00:50:55,578
So he probably likes
being spanked.

971
00:50:55,719 --> 00:50:57,277
Or buggered. Or both.

972
00:50:57,421 --> 00:51:00,185
- Sounds like good sex to me.
- And me!

973
00:51:00,323 --> 00:51:01,688
And me actually.

974
00:51:03,527 --> 00:51:06,985
I can't believe he's so late!
Pandora, try Sasha's mobile.

975
00:51:07,130 --> 00:51:08,597
- I tried it 5 minutes ago.
- Try again.

976
00:51:08,732 --> 00:51:10,290
And leave another message.

977
00:51:10,434 --> 00:51:11,992
Do you have his boyfriend's
number in Paris?

978
00:51:12,135 --> 00:51:13,796
He got back from Paris
last night.

979
00:51:13,937 --> 00:51:15,495
He broke up with his boyfriend
this weekend.

980
00:51:15,639 --> 00:51:17,504
- He did? Is he OK?
- Not really.

981
00:51:17,641 --> 00:51:20,405
But Jacks, look, it'll be fine.
Sasha always turns up.

982
00:51:20,544 --> 00:51:23,104
- I left another message.
- Thanks, Pandora.

983
00:51:24,514 --> 00:51:27,381
So I had a nice evening
with Peter the other night.

984
00:51:27,517 --> 00:51:29,781
Oh my God! Really?
Isn't he great?

985
00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:32,286
Smart, funny and cute.

986
00:51:32,422 --> 00:51:34,890
Yes, he's absolutely lovely.

987
00:51:35,025 --> 00:51:35,889
Where's Daphne?

988
00:51:36,026 --> 00:51:38,290
She had to go to court today.
She left me in charge.

989
00:51:38,428 --> 00:51:40,089
Who put up those lights?

990
00:51:40,230 --> 00:51:41,891
I did, I thought you
might want them in the shot.

991
00:51:42,032 --> 00:51:45,399
You're not here to think!
You're here to do what I think! OK?

992
00:51:45,535 --> 00:51:48,197
So now you take all this down
and you bring me a ring light.

993
00:51:50,540 --> 00:51:53,703
Pandora?
Where is Pandora? Where is it?

994
00:51:53,844 --> 00:51:54,902
Here.

995
00:51:55,245 --> 00:51:56,212
What's yourjob?

996
00:51:57,214 --> 00:51:58,681
I'm a wardrobe assistant.

997
00:51:58,815 --> 00:52:01,784
A wardrobe assistant?
No, you're a piece of shit!

998
00:52:01,918 --> 00:52:03,886
How dare you call my mobile
every 10 minutes

999
00:52:04,020 --> 00:52:04,782
and leave me endless messages.

1000
00:52:04,921 --> 00:52:07,185
I told her to call, Sasha!
We were worried.

1001
00:52:07,324 --> 00:52:09,189
- You were late.
- I know I was late!

1002
00:52:09,326 --> 00:52:11,294
I just don't need
a nobody leaving me

1003
00:52:11,428 --> 00:52:12,793
endless messages about it!

1004
00:52:12,929 --> 00:52:15,193
- I understand you had a rough weekend...
- No, you don't understand!

1005
00:52:15,332 --> 00:52:16,697
You understand nothing!

1006
00:52:16,833 --> 00:52:18,892
And I suggest you stop
meddling with things

1007
00:52:19,035 --> 00:52:20,593
you don't understand,
and just do yourjob!

1008
00:52:20,737 --> 00:52:21,704
Whatever the hell that is.

1009
00:52:21,838 --> 00:52:23,100
I don't know,
go steam something!

1010
00:52:23,240 --> 00:52:24,207
Sasha!

1011
00:52:24,341 --> 00:52:25,308
Jacks, he doesn't mean that...

1012
00:52:25,442 --> 00:52:28,309
- Don't you tell her what I mean!
- Don't speak to her like that.

1013
00:52:31,715 --> 00:52:33,979
Get out! You're fired!
You heard me? You're fired!

1014
00:52:34,117 --> 00:52:35,277
Go back to Argentina!

1015
00:52:35,418 --> 00:52:37,784
You and your little
pathetic snapshots!

1016
00:52:37,921 --> 00:52:38,979
Bye bye!

1017
00:52:40,223 --> 00:52:42,783
Anyone else have
something to say?

1018
00:52:43,426 --> 00:52:44,893
I have something to say.

1019
00:52:46,630 --> 00:52:48,598
- Apologize!
- I'm sorry?

1020
00:52:48,732 --> 00:52:50,996
I said apologize!

1021
00:52:51,735 --> 00:52:53,600
- Are you insane?
- Obviously!

1022
00:52:53,737 --> 00:52:56,103
I work at Vogue!
But don't change the subject!

1023
00:52:56,239 --> 00:52:58,104
- Apologize.
- Or else?

1024
00:52:58,241 --> 00:53:00,801
Or else, I'm walking out
with all those dresses.

1025
00:53:01,945 --> 00:53:04,880
Oh! I have a better idea.
I will do the walking out thing.

1026
00:53:05,015 --> 00:53:07,381
And let's see what Daphne
has to say about that!

1027
00:53:16,526 --> 00:53:18,585
Paolo, can I ask a favour?

1028
00:53:19,229 --> 00:53:22,494
Ah, the classic movie moment
when the underdog gets to prove

1029
00:53:22,632 --> 00:53:25,192
his real worth and win
the heart of his true love!

1030
00:53:25,335 --> 00:53:26,302
Don't give away the ending!

1031
00:53:26,436 --> 00:53:28,802
It's a romantic comedy!
How do you think it ends?

1032
00:53:30,040 --> 00:53:31,803
Hi, sunshine, how are you?

1033
00:53:31,942 --> 00:53:34,206
I just had the most surreal day.

1034
00:53:34,344 --> 00:53:35,504
I had a huge fight with Sasha.

1035
00:53:35,645 --> 00:53:38,079
Paolo took over the shoot,
and he was absolutely brilliant.

1036
00:53:38,215 --> 00:53:39,682
I'm probably going to
get fired tomorrow,

1037
00:53:39,816 --> 00:53:41,681
but it was so worth itjust
to see Paolo in action.

1038
00:53:41,818 --> 00:53:44,082
Oh my God! This is so scary!

1039
00:53:44,221 --> 00:53:45,586
What's she watching?

1040
00:53:45,722 --> 00:53:46,882
Notting Hill.

1041
00:53:48,225 --> 00:53:49,385
So what did you think
about Paolo?

1042
00:53:49,526 --> 00:53:50,788
Was I right or was I right?

1043
00:53:50,927 --> 00:53:52,485
Are those my only options?

1044
00:53:52,629 --> 00:53:54,187
Oh no, don't tell me
you didn't like him.

1045
00:53:54,331 --> 00:53:56,492
I liked him a lot!
I'm just not sure I'm his type.

1046
00:53:56,633 --> 00:53:57,600
Of course, you're his type!

1047
00:53:57,734 --> 00:53:59,793
He told me himself
he thought you were 'lovely.'

1048
00:53:59,936 --> 00:54:01,403
Well, I didn't see that coming!

1049
00:54:01,538 --> 00:54:02,402
What?

1050
00:54:02,539 --> 00:54:05,702
Julia Roberts ending up
with Hugh Grant!

1051
00:54:12,415 --> 00:54:14,679
You know, Jacks. When I told you
to take care of the shoot,

1052
00:54:14,818 --> 00:54:17,378
I was thinking more along
the lines of ordering the sushi,

1053
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:19,488
not enraging
our top photographer.

1054
00:54:19,623 --> 00:54:21,887
I can't help it if Sasha's
an overpampered monster.

1055
00:54:22,025 --> 00:54:25,392
We work in fashion.
Everyone's an overpampered monster.

1056
00:54:25,528 --> 00:54:28,190
Yes, but that isn't an excuse
to be so vile to people.

1057
00:54:28,331 --> 00:54:31,789
Besides, his pictures don't
have an ounce of truth to them.

1058
00:54:31,935 --> 00:54:35,393
But since when does truth have
anything to do with fashion?

1059
00:54:35,538 --> 00:54:38,302
Well, it doesn't.

1060
00:54:38,441 --> 00:54:39,806
But maybe it should.

1061
00:54:42,445 --> 00:54:44,970
- So you were Sasha's assistant?
- Yes.

1062
00:54:45,115 --> 00:54:46,673
How very 'All About Eve.'

1063
00:54:46,816 --> 00:54:48,579
'All About Eve? '

1064
00:54:48,718 --> 00:54:49,878
It's a movie, darling.

1065
00:54:50,020 --> 00:54:52,079
It's about an assistant
who seems all sweet and innocent

1066
00:54:52,222 --> 00:54:54,884
but is really quite
ambitious and ruthless.

1067
00:54:55,025 --> 00:54:56,083
You should rent it sometime.

1068
00:54:56,226 --> 00:54:57,591
Daphne, he was doing me
a favour.

1069
00:54:57,727 --> 00:54:59,388
- I've seen it.
- You have?

1070
00:54:59,529 --> 00:55:00,791
And what did you think?

1071
00:55:00,930 --> 00:55:03,091
I found it rather silly actually.

1072
00:55:03,233 --> 00:55:06,600
The idea that Bette Davis could be
the victim of anyone is absurd.

1073
00:55:18,415 --> 00:55:19,882
Pick 4 and run it.

1074
00:55:29,326 --> 00:55:31,590
Oh my God, Paolo!
You were amazing!

1075
00:55:31,728 --> 00:55:32,888
Thanks. So were you!

1076
00:55:33,029 --> 00:55:34,087
The way you handled Daphne!

1077
00:55:34,230 --> 00:55:36,790
I mean I knew you were talented,
but I had no idea that under

1078
00:55:36,933 --> 00:55:41,097
that shy, sweet exterior was
such steely confidence!

1079
00:55:41,237 --> 00:55:43,705
What other secrets are
you keeping from me?

1080
00:55:44,941 --> 00:55:47,501
Actually, Jacks,
I did want to talk to you about...

1081
00:55:47,644 --> 00:55:50,374
- Ah, Jacks! There you are!
- James?

1082
00:55:50,513 --> 00:55:51,775
Hello, Darling!

1083
00:55:51,915 --> 00:55:53,280
Hello?

1084
00:55:53,416 --> 00:55:55,077
James, you remember Paolo?

1085
00:55:55,218 --> 00:55:56,583
Yes. Hello, Paolo?

1086
00:55:56,720 --> 00:55:57,584
James?

1087
00:55:57,721 --> 00:55:58,881
What are you doing here?

1088
00:55:59,022 --> 00:56:00,785
Well, actually, I was just
having lunch across the street

1089
00:56:00,924 --> 00:56:02,789
and I came to tell you
the good news in person.

1090
00:56:02,926 --> 00:56:03,688
What good news?

1091
00:56:03,827 --> 00:56:06,796
Peter is finally going to meet
the love of his life!

1092
00:56:06,930 --> 00:56:08,898
- What?
- David Williams is in town.

1093
00:56:09,032 --> 00:56:10,590
He's leading a special auction
at Sotheby's.

1094
00:56:10,734 --> 00:56:11,701
And he and I were just
having lunch together,

1095
00:56:11,835 --> 00:56:12,995
and I just happened to mention
Peter's name.

1096
00:56:13,136 --> 00:56:16,105
And he suggested that we bring
Peter to the auction tonight!

1097
00:56:16,239 --> 00:56:17,706
- He did?
- Well, actually, I suggested it.

1098
00:56:17,841 --> 00:56:19,706
But he thinks it's a great idea!

1099
00:56:19,843 --> 00:56:22,403
So did I do good
or did I do good?

1100
00:56:22,545 --> 00:56:23,978
You did great.

1101
00:56:26,316 --> 00:56:28,580
I should probably go.

1102
00:56:29,018 --> 00:56:32,476
Paolo, congratulations on today.

1103
00:56:34,524 --> 00:56:36,890
Tell Peter I wish him
good luck with David.

1104
00:56:41,631 --> 00:56:42,791
Jacks?

1105
00:56:43,733 --> 00:56:44,893
What are you thinking?

1106
00:56:45,735 --> 00:56:48,704
I'm thinking about
Peter and David living

1107
00:56:48,838 --> 00:56:50,499
happily ever after.

1108
00:56:56,045 --> 00:56:58,172
What if I've written
the worst script ever?

1109
00:56:58,314 --> 00:56:59,975
What if everyone hates it?

1110
00:57:00,116 --> 00:57:03,085
Look, most great artists have to
deal with rejection in their lifetime.

1111
00:57:03,219 --> 00:57:04,686
Yes, I'm not a great artist!

1112
00:57:04,821 --> 00:57:07,381
Look, I know I'm not
some genius like Van Gogh.

1113
00:57:07,524 --> 00:57:09,583
Thank God.
I like my men with 2 ears.

1114
00:57:09,726 --> 00:57:11,387
I'm, I'm being serious.

1115
00:57:11,528 --> 00:57:14,395
What if I'm not any good?
What if I have no talent?

1116
00:57:14,531 --> 00:57:16,795
Are you asking
if I'll still love you?

1117
00:57:17,934 --> 00:57:19,299
- Snap out of it will you?
- What?

1118
00:57:19,836 --> 00:57:20,894
We're here.

1119
00:57:26,142 --> 00:57:27,700
There you are!
You guys are late.

1120
00:57:27,844 --> 00:57:29,311
Fin, I'm not sure
this is such a good idea.

1121
00:57:29,446 --> 00:57:30,674
It's an excellent idea.

1122
00:57:30,814 --> 00:57:32,179
He's perfect for you,
Paul, darling!

1123
00:57:32,315 --> 00:57:34,783
Peter! His name is Peter!

1124
00:57:34,918 --> 00:57:36,579
You're about to meet the
love of your life!

1125
00:57:36,719 --> 00:57:37,276
To the left!

1126
00:57:37,420 --> 00:57:38,887
There is no need to be
so nasty to me

1127
00:57:39,022 --> 00:57:39,886
just because I don't remember
people's names.

1128
00:57:40,023 --> 00:57:41,888
550 with you madam,
thank you very much.

1129
00:57:42,025 --> 00:57:44,585
- That's him!
- 580. Anything further on 580?

1130
00:57:44,727 --> 00:57:46,092
- I can't see him.
- There!

1131
00:57:46,229 --> 00:57:48,288
I have �600,000.

1132
00:57:48,431 --> 00:57:49,898
Back to the telephone bank.

1133
00:57:50,033 --> 00:57:51,500
That's not him.
That's not him!

1134
00:57:51,634 --> 00:57:52,896
- You're kidding?
- No!

1135
00:57:53,036 --> 00:57:54,799
- That's David?
- No!

1136
00:57:54,938 --> 00:57:55,597
- Are you sure?
- Yes!

1137
00:57:55,738 --> 00:57:56,397
I have no idea!

1138
00:57:56,539 --> 00:57:58,803
Of course that's David!
He's just cut his hair.

1139
00:57:58,942 --> 00:57:59,704
What hair?

1140
00:57:59,843 --> 00:58:01,003
He's got a lovely smile!

1141
00:58:01,144 --> 00:58:03,476
- He's just cut his hair!
- And he's lost some weight.

1142
00:58:03,613 --> 00:58:05,877
- I don't think so, Fergus...
- It's Finlay!

1143
00:58:06,015 --> 00:58:07,573
- What?
- That is not him! OK?

1144
00:58:07,717 --> 00:58:10,083
That is not the man
I bumped into at the Chancery Hotel.

1145
00:58:10,220 --> 00:58:11,482
That is not him!

1146
00:58:11,621 --> 00:58:13,282
Well, he's good enough!

1147
00:58:13,423 --> 00:58:15,186
Oh no! No, he's not good enough!

1148
00:58:15,325 --> 00:58:19,091
Because, that man right there,
the real David Williams actually exists!

1149
00:58:19,229 --> 00:58:23,495
The real David Williams happens
to be a living, breathing,

1150
00:58:23,633 --> 00:58:25,794
on-the-market gay man!

1151
00:58:43,119 --> 00:58:46,088
Morning, sunshine.
How you feeling?

1152
00:58:46,222 --> 00:58:48,986
- Exhausted. You?
- Fine.

1153
00:58:49,125 --> 00:58:51,685
I'm going to brunch with Finlay
and the wrong David.

1154
00:58:51,828 --> 00:58:53,386
I'm so sorry.

1155
00:58:53,530 --> 00:58:54,792
Sorry you outed
a total stranger

1156
00:58:54,931 --> 00:58:56,694
or sorry it's the wrong
total stranger?

1157
00:58:56,833 --> 00:58:57,800
Both.

1158
00:58:57,934 --> 00:58:59,094
I'm quite relieved, to be honest.

1159
00:58:59,235 --> 00:59:00,497
At least it's over and done with.

1160
00:59:01,437 --> 00:59:03,302
- You OK?
- I'm fine.

1161
00:59:03,439 --> 00:59:06,602
I was just up most of
the night thinking...

1162
00:59:06,743 --> 00:59:07,801
About?

1163
00:59:07,944 --> 00:59:11,471
Oh, love and other disasters.

1164
00:59:12,515 --> 00:59:14,380
- That must be Finlay.
- Send him my love.

1165
00:59:14,517 --> 00:59:16,985
- I don't have to go to this thing.
- Go!

1166
00:59:25,228 --> 00:59:26,286
I'll be right down.

1167
00:59:32,135 --> 00:59:34,501
- Morning.
- Morning.

1168
00:59:35,438 --> 00:59:38,202
- Would you like some coffee?
- No, thank you.

1169
00:59:40,043 --> 00:59:42,511
That's Peter, he must have
forgotten his keys.

1170
00:59:43,813 --> 00:59:45,178
I'm going to take a bath.

1171
00:59:49,519 --> 00:59:50,884
Paolo, hi!

1172
00:59:51,020 --> 00:59:52,885
- Hi.
- Are you OK?

1173
00:59:53,823 --> 00:59:56,189
Not really.
I haven't slept all night.

1174
00:59:56,326 --> 00:59:58,294
Come in. Come in.

1175
00:59:59,629 --> 01:00:00,687
It's just...

1176
01:00:01,831 --> 01:00:03,799
I've been wanting to talk to you
about the other night with Peter.

1177
01:00:03,933 --> 01:00:08,097
But it seems every time I'm about to,
something or someone gets in the way.

1178
01:00:08,237 --> 01:00:09,295
I'm sorry.

1179
01:00:09,439 --> 01:00:12,203
No! It's not your fault.
It's just...

1180
01:00:13,743 --> 01:00:17,076
- He's not here, is he?
- No. No, he's out.

1181
01:00:17,213 --> 01:00:18,077
Good.

1182
01:00:18,214 --> 01:00:21,081
- I feel terrible.
Why should you feel terrible?

1183
01:00:21,217 --> 01:00:23,378
I had no idea how you felt.

1184
01:00:25,521 --> 01:00:26,579
What the hell is going on?

1185
01:00:26,723 --> 01:00:28,782
- I don't believe it.
- No, wait!

1186
01:00:28,925 --> 01:00:30,483
- I shouldn't have come.
- Wait!

1187
01:00:30,627 --> 01:00:32,288
- James, what's wrong with you?
- Nothing's wrong with me!

1188
01:00:32,428 --> 01:00:33,690
He needs to talk!
What's your problem?

1189
01:00:33,830 --> 01:00:34,694
He's my problem!

1190
01:00:34,831 --> 01:00:36,992
Excuse me? Paolo!

1191
01:00:39,636 --> 01:00:41,695
I may not speak Spanish,
but I'm not an idiot.

1192
01:00:41,838 --> 01:00:42,702
What are you talking about?

1193
01:00:42,839 --> 01:00:44,306
I'm talking about you
and that bloody Paolo.

1194
01:00:44,440 --> 01:00:46,305
He was upset about Peter.
He wanted to talk.

1195
01:00:46,442 --> 01:00:47,500
Bullshit!

1196
01:00:47,644 --> 01:00:49,111
- What?
- I want him out of your life!

1197
01:00:49,245 --> 01:00:51,372
- Or else?
- Or else we're through!

1198
01:00:51,514 --> 01:00:54,779
See. This is exactly why I don't
want to be in a relationship with you!

1199
01:00:55,518 --> 01:00:56,985
Oh really?

1200
01:00:57,120 --> 01:00:58,883
Then what the hell is this?
What the hell are we in?

1201
01:00:59,622 --> 01:01:00,680
I don't know.

1202
01:01:02,125 --> 01:01:03,990
This is just some sort of
fucking game to you, isn't it?

1203
01:01:04,127 --> 01:01:04,684
What's a game?

1204
01:01:04,827 --> 01:01:07,295
This. We fuck and then you say
you don't want a relationship.

1205
01:01:07,430 --> 01:01:09,489
- It's not a game.
- Oh no? Then what is it?

1206
01:01:10,333 --> 01:01:11,391
It's...

1207
01:01:12,435 --> 01:01:13,197
It's the truth.

1208
01:01:13,336 --> 01:01:15,497
Bullshit!
I don't believe it is the truth!

1209
01:01:15,638 --> 01:01:17,105
For the last six months
you've been saying one thing

1210
01:01:17,240 --> 01:01:18,901
and then doing another.
You've been playing me!

1211
01:01:19,042 --> 01:01:20,100
No!

1212
01:01:21,144 --> 01:01:22,509
But I am sorry.

1213
01:01:22,645 --> 01:01:23,873
What are you sorry about?

1214
01:01:24,714 --> 01:01:26,181
I didn't mean to hurt you!

1215
01:01:27,917 --> 01:01:29,680
Fucking condescending!

1216
01:01:29,819 --> 01:01:31,582
I didn't mean it like that.

1217
01:01:31,721 --> 01:01:34,281
I just... I want...

1218
01:01:34,424 --> 01:01:35,482
What do you want?

1219
01:01:37,527 --> 01:01:39,290
I want this to end.

1220
01:01:54,744 --> 01:01:57,178
So after all that,
I'm not the one?

1221
01:01:57,313 --> 01:01:58,780
Bit of a relief, huh?

1222
01:01:58,915 --> 01:01:59,973
I suppose so.

1223
01:02:00,116 --> 01:02:01,481
You must have thought
I was a stalker freak.

1224
01:02:01,617 --> 01:02:02,879
Thanks to my discreet friends.

1225
01:02:03,019 --> 01:02:03,883
We were just trying to help.

1226
01:02:04,020 --> 01:02:05,681
Yes, by making me out to be
a desperate fantasist?

1227
01:02:05,822 --> 01:02:07,483
You are a desperate fantasist.

1228
01:02:07,623 --> 01:02:08,988
- No, I'm not actually.
- He is.

1229
01:02:09,125 --> 01:02:11,593
I'm a fantasist,
I'm not desperate.

1230
01:02:11,728 --> 01:02:13,696
Well, I suppose I'd never have
lived up to your fantasy anyway.

1231
01:02:13,830 --> 01:02:15,991
Trust me, David.
Nobody could.

1232
01:02:16,132 --> 01:02:18,191
- Tom!
- Sorry, I'm late!

1233
01:02:19,936 --> 01:02:22,404
- Tom, this is Peter and Finlay.
- Hey, Tom. I think we've met.

1234
01:02:22,538 --> 01:02:25,996
- Finlay! How have you been?
- Great! And you?

1235
01:02:26,142 --> 01:02:28,110
Can't complain.
Can't complain.

1236
01:02:28,244 --> 01:02:29,711
Finally out of the art world!

1237
01:02:29,846 --> 01:02:30,870
Tom's acting now.

1238
01:02:31,013 --> 01:02:32,275
- Acting?
- Yeah, that's why I'm late.

1239
01:02:32,415 --> 01:02:34,076
Had an audition for
a new drama at the BBC.

1240
01:02:34,217 --> 01:02:36,276
- How'd it go?
- Good! Well, great actually.

1241
01:02:36,419 --> 01:02:39,388
I was so inside
the character. You know?

1242
01:02:39,522 --> 01:02:40,580
And then they asked for a monologue

1243
01:02:40,723 --> 01:02:42,987
so I did that one from
Streetcar which everyone loves.

1244
01:02:43,126 --> 01:02:46,095
The actress I was doing it with,
she was hopeless.

1245
01:02:46,229 --> 01:02:47,196
I was doing my best...

1246
01:02:47,330 --> 01:02:48,388
Are you OK?

1247
01:02:50,032 --> 01:02:51,397
- That's him.
- Who?

1248
01:02:51,534 --> 01:02:53,399
That's the guy I bumped into
at the Hotel!

1249
01:02:53,536 --> 01:02:54,594
What?

1250
01:02:55,738 --> 01:02:56,397
Sorry.

1251
01:02:56,539 --> 01:03:00,305
Excuse me, I just need to use
the loo, actually.

1252
01:03:00,443 --> 01:03:02,502
- Finlay?
- Right! I'll just...

1253
01:03:03,246 --> 01:03:04,270
Give you a hand!

1254
01:03:07,517 --> 01:03:09,178
I can't believe you said
'I'll give you a hand! '

1255
01:03:09,318 --> 01:03:10,580
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

1256
01:03:10,720 --> 01:03:12,881
But listen, I think
I know what happened!

1257
01:03:13,022 --> 01:03:15,081
Tom used to be
David's assistant.

1258
01:03:15,224 --> 01:03:16,486
They both must have gone
to the hotel,

1259
01:03:16,626 --> 01:03:18,389
but Tom arrived with
the paintings on his own.

1260
01:03:18,528 --> 01:03:19,688
Which is when you bumped
into him!

1261
01:03:19,829 --> 01:03:21,592
Great! So, now what do I do?

1262
01:03:22,231 --> 01:03:24,096
Well, I'd probably zip up.

1263
01:03:24,934 --> 01:03:26,401
Mustn't seem over-eager.

1264
01:03:27,637 --> 01:03:30,401
I can't believe you're cooking dinner
for some guy you just met yesterday!

1265
01:03:30,540 --> 01:03:32,303
His name is Tom.
You know what they say.

1266
01:03:32,441 --> 01:03:34,102
'The way to a man's heart is
through his stomach.'

1267
01:03:34,243 --> 01:03:35,608
Don't you think that's aiming
a bit high?

1268
01:03:35,745 --> 01:03:37,474
Don't you think you should
applaud my courage?

1269
01:03:37,613 --> 01:03:39,376
I would but my hands are full.

1270
01:03:39,715 --> 01:03:40,875
Anyway, I'm off.

1271
01:03:41,017 --> 01:03:42,279
Don't you at least
want to meet Tom?

1272
01:03:42,418 --> 01:03:44,386
Why? I prefer Paolo.

1273
01:03:44,520 --> 01:03:46,681
Maybe that's something
worth considering.

1274
01:03:46,823 --> 01:03:47,983
Little late for that.

1275
01:03:56,632 --> 01:03:58,395
I've been trying to call you
since yesterday

1276
01:03:58,534 --> 01:03:59,899
but your mobile isn't working.

1277
01:04:00,036 --> 01:04:01,799
I, I ran out of credit.

1278
01:04:02,738 --> 01:04:05,002
- Can I come in?
- Yeah, sure.

1279
01:04:05,942 --> 01:04:06,909
What are you doing?

1280
01:04:07,043 --> 01:04:09,511
I have to fly back to
Argentina tomorrow.

1281
01:04:09,645 --> 01:04:11,977
- What? Why?
- I don't belong here.

1282
01:04:12,114 --> 01:04:13,274
What are you talking about?

1283
01:04:13,416 --> 01:04:15,077
Your career's about to
take off in London.

1284
01:04:15,218 --> 01:04:17,277
You have 4 pages in the new Vogue!

1285
01:04:17,420 --> 01:04:18,887
OK, I know how you feel
about fashion.

1286
01:04:19,021 --> 01:04:19,680
And I agree with you!

1287
01:04:19,822 --> 01:04:21,585
But at least it'll pay the rent.
While you do your own work.

1288
01:04:21,724 --> 01:04:25,490
And I've spoken to Finlay.
And he wants to meet you.

1289
01:04:25,628 --> 01:04:27,892
Maybe put a show on at
his gallery for you.

1290
01:04:28,030 --> 01:04:30,294
- You can'tjust go home now!
- I'm being deported.

1291
01:04:31,534 --> 01:04:33,502
Immigration got a tip
I was working here illegally.

1292
01:04:33,636 --> 01:04:36,605
- A tip? From who?
- Does it matter?

1293
01:04:38,040 --> 01:04:39,098
James.

1294
01:04:39,842 --> 01:04:41,002
It was James.

1295
01:04:41,143 --> 01:04:42,405
We don't know that.

1296
01:04:44,714 --> 01:04:47,376
- You're not going.
- Jacks, I don't have a choice.

1297
01:04:48,417 --> 01:04:49,884
Yes, you do.

1298
01:04:50,019 --> 01:04:51,179
You can marry me!

1299
01:04:54,523 --> 01:04:57,686
Jacks. I can't ask you
to do that.

1300
01:04:57,827 --> 01:04:59,089
Then it's a good thing I'm asking!

1301
01:04:59,228 --> 01:05:02,197
Yes. And it's very kind of you.
But...

1302
01:05:02,632 --> 01:05:04,293
It's not fair to you.

1303
01:05:05,434 --> 01:05:07,902
Look. I know you think I'm
doing this out of guilt or pity.

1304
01:05:08,037 --> 01:05:09,095
But that's just not true.

1305
01:05:09,238 --> 01:05:11,798
I'm doing this
because I want to.

1306
01:05:11,941 --> 01:05:14,501
Because I know that you're on the
verge of fulfilling your dreams!

1307
01:05:14,644 --> 01:05:17,374
And if I could be a part of that,
that would make me happy.

1308
01:05:17,513 --> 01:05:21,176
And I don't want you to go.
So please. Marry me!

1309
01:05:24,220 --> 01:05:26,188
I don't know what to say.

1310
01:05:26,322 --> 01:05:30,281
Well, unless you want me to feel
totally humiliated say yes.

1311
01:05:33,930 --> 01:05:37,593
I'm like, fuck that.
I know I'm talented.

1312
01:05:37,733 --> 01:05:39,792
I don't need some RADA degree
to tell me.

1313
01:05:39,936 --> 01:05:40,800
You know what I mean?

1314
01:05:41,437 --> 01:05:42,699
And besides,
I'm not interested in

1315
01:05:42,838 --> 01:05:44,703
being some luvvie
character actor.

1316
01:05:44,840 --> 01:05:47,308
I am a leading man,
for fuck's sake.

1317
01:05:47,443 --> 01:05:49,809
So why waste my time studying
during my peak years.

1318
01:05:49,946 --> 01:05:50,776
You know what I mean?

1319
01:05:52,014 --> 01:05:55,177
Yes, yes.
Well, I, I think I do.

1320
01:05:55,318 --> 01:05:57,786
I mean sometimes studying can
become a way of avoiding doing...

1321
01:05:57,920 --> 01:06:00,081
I'm just not sure whether
I should cut my hair.

1322
01:06:00,923 --> 01:06:03,289
I mean, my agent thinks I should,
but I think it's what makes me

1323
01:06:03,426 --> 01:06:05,087
distinctive.
You know what I mean?

1324
01:06:05,828 --> 01:06:07,193
Yeah. I think I do.

1325
01:06:07,830 --> 01:06:09,798
So... you wanna go to bed?

1326
01:06:10,833 --> 01:06:11,390
What?

1327
01:06:11,534 --> 01:06:14,196
Do you want to go to bed?
You know, have sex?

1328
01:06:14,337 --> 01:06:15,395
I...

1329
01:06:16,238 --> 01:06:18,206
I don't like wasting time
when I know what I want.

1330
01:06:24,313 --> 01:06:25,871
Is everything OK?

1331
01:06:26,015 --> 01:06:29,075
Yes, I was just trying Peter,
but he didn't answer.

1332
01:06:29,218 --> 01:06:31,880
Oh, you ordered me another drink.
Thanks, Babies!

1333
01:06:32,021 --> 01:06:33,488
You're so thoughtful!

1334
01:06:35,825 --> 01:06:37,486
So what happened
with you and James?

1335
01:06:37,626 --> 01:06:39,992
The same thing that happens
with all straight men.

1336
01:06:40,129 --> 01:06:42,791
They pretend that they're fine
with you having a career

1337
01:06:42,932 --> 01:06:43,796
and being independent.

1338
01:06:43,933 --> 01:06:47,391
But deep down, they resent it.
Or they want to change it.

1339
01:06:47,536 --> 01:06:49,504
Well, not all straight men.

1340
01:06:49,638 --> 01:06:52,106
Trust me! All of them!

1341
01:06:52,241 --> 01:06:55,301
At the end of the day, all
straight men just want one thing.

1342
01:06:55,444 --> 01:06:56,502
You know what that is?

1343
01:06:57,213 --> 01:06:58,475
Sex?

1344
01:06:58,614 --> 01:06:59,672
Control!

1345
01:06:59,815 --> 01:07:01,680
The problem with straight men
is that no matter how hard

1346
01:07:01,817 --> 01:07:04,183
they try, they still
need to control, to dominate.

1347
01:07:04,320 --> 01:07:05,787
Thank God you're gay!

1348
01:07:06,722 --> 01:07:08,280
- Jacks.
- I mean think about it!

1349
01:07:08,424 --> 01:07:10,085
Why do you think we feel
so comfortable together?

1350
01:07:10,226 --> 01:07:12,387
Because I know you're not
trying to score.

1351
01:07:12,528 --> 01:07:15,691
Anyway. I'm through
with straight men!

1352
01:07:15,831 --> 01:07:17,298
A toast!

1353
01:07:17,433 --> 01:07:19,901
No more straight men!

1354
01:07:20,036 --> 01:07:21,901
Good riddance I say!

1355
01:07:22,738 --> 01:07:25,605
And now, we have a very special
dedication for Paolo.

1356
01:07:25,741 --> 01:07:28,403
Paolo, this one's from
your future wife!

1357
01:07:35,718 --> 01:07:37,982
Happy Wedding, Babies!

1358
01:08:22,531 --> 01:08:26,399
I just remembered that Peter
might have a boy at the house.

1359
01:08:26,535 --> 01:08:29,902
Can I stay at yours?
Sunderland Terrace!

1360
01:08:34,143 --> 01:08:35,201
Thanks.

1361
01:08:41,317 --> 01:08:43,581
Oh my god, I just used
your toothbrush.

1362
01:08:43,719 --> 01:08:44,981
No problem.

1363
01:08:45,121 --> 01:08:46,486
I think I'm drunk.

1364
01:08:48,324 --> 01:08:50,588
The room's sloshing.

1365
01:08:52,128 --> 01:08:54,096
You going to stand up all night?

1366
01:08:54,930 --> 01:08:57,398
- No.
- Good. Come.

1367
01:08:59,935 --> 01:09:02,995
I think my parents would
have really liked you.

1368
01:09:03,139 --> 01:09:10,477
You're so smart and kind
and you're so really talented.

1369
01:09:11,413 --> 01:09:12,880
- Jacks!
- I think you're exactly

1370
01:09:13,015 --> 01:09:15,279
the kind of person they would
have wanted me to marry.

1371
01:09:15,417 --> 01:09:17,885
Well, not exactly.

1372
01:09:18,020 --> 01:09:20,682
But not in terms of what counts.

1373
01:09:23,025 --> 01:09:26,688
I know that I don't know
you very well,

1374
01:09:26,829 --> 01:09:29,093
but I feel safe with you.

1375
01:09:29,231 --> 01:09:31,199
Is that crazy?

1376
01:09:31,333 --> 01:09:33,301
No. It's not crazy.

1377
01:09:34,136 --> 01:09:35,398
I trust you.

1378
01:09:36,839 --> 01:09:39,000
Jacks, I need to tell
you something.

1379
01:09:39,141 --> 01:09:41,507
- Get into bed and tell me.
- I can't.

1380
01:09:41,644 --> 01:09:44,477
I promise I won't make a pass.

1381
01:09:44,613 --> 01:09:47,582
- It's not you I'm worried about.
- What, Paolo?

1382
01:10:01,931 --> 01:10:03,694
You're so drunk!

1383
01:10:28,624 --> 01:10:29,682
Tom.

1384
01:10:32,328 --> 01:10:35,092
Tom! It's time to get up.

1385
01:10:36,232 --> 01:10:38,894
- What time is it?
- Almost 9.

1386
01:10:40,936 --> 01:10:42,198
You gotta go.

1387
01:10:43,339 --> 01:10:45,307
- Excuse me?
- You gotta go.

1388
01:10:45,441 --> 01:10:48,410
I've got some friends
coming over for brunch.

1389
01:10:49,945 --> 01:10:51,469
Tom, you're in my apartment.

1390
01:11:18,841 --> 01:11:20,502
Talullah, I can't get
into it now.

1391
01:11:20,643 --> 01:11:22,304
Just meet me at the Registry.

1392
01:11:22,444 --> 01:11:24,776
I'm not getting married
without a maid of honour.

1393
01:11:24,913 --> 01:11:28,280
No! Sweetie, you don't need
to write a poem.

1394
01:11:29,318 --> 01:11:31,684
Look, I have to try Peter again.

1395
01:11:31,820 --> 01:11:33,685
He hasn't been answering
the phone all night.

1396
01:11:34,323 --> 01:11:35,984
OK, bye.

1397
01:11:41,830 --> 01:11:43,593
- Hello?
- Peter! Finally!

1398
01:11:43,732 --> 01:11:46,098
- Hi, Jacks.
- I've been calling you all night!

1399
01:11:46,235 --> 01:11:48,203
I know, I'm sorry.
I turned my phone off.

1400
01:11:48,337 --> 01:11:50,100
- Tim spend the night?
- Tom!

1401
01:11:50,239 --> 01:11:53,208
- Whatever.
- I agree. Reality crashes in.

1402
01:11:53,342 --> 01:11:55,708
I'm sorry, Babies.
Now listen.

1403
01:11:55,844 --> 01:11:58,779
I need you to come down to
the Islington Registry right away.

1404
01:11:58,914 --> 01:12:01,178
- I'm getting married.
- What? Jacks!

1405
01:12:01,317 --> 01:12:02,875
I'll tell you everything
when you get there.

1406
01:12:03,018 --> 01:12:05,486
I just managed to get
a cancellation at 11 sharp.

1407
01:12:05,621 --> 01:12:06,485
That's in 20 minutes!

1408
01:12:06,622 --> 01:12:08,180
And I still need to
buy a wedding outfit!

1409
01:12:08,324 --> 01:12:09,985
- Gotta run. Bye!
- Oh, wait!

1410
01:12:11,226 --> 01:12:12,784
Oh, pull over right there!

1411
01:12:15,631 --> 01:12:16,689
I'll be right back!

1412
01:12:36,018 --> 01:12:37,485
Paolo! Thank God you're here!

1413
01:12:37,619 --> 01:12:38,779
- Have they called our names yet?
- No.

1414
01:12:38,921 --> 01:12:42,880
Emily Jackson
and Paolo Sar-mentio?

1415
01:12:52,735 --> 01:12:54,896
Are you all here for
the Jackson wedding party?

1416
01:13:11,920 --> 01:13:13,581
If anyone knows why these
two individuals before me

1417
01:13:13,722 --> 01:13:15,383
should not be married,
let them speak now

1418
01:13:15,524 --> 01:13:16,491
or forever hold their peace.

1419
01:13:16,625 --> 01:13:18,991
- I'm not gay.
- Excuse me?

1420
01:13:19,128 --> 01:13:20,186
I'm not gay!

1421
01:13:23,732 --> 01:13:25,791
Of course you're not gay!

1422
01:13:25,934 --> 01:13:28,698
He's not! Gay. I mean.

1423
01:13:30,038 --> 01:13:31,300
How nice for both of you.

1424
01:13:32,040 --> 01:13:33,803
Now, if there's any other
reason why...

1425
01:13:33,942 --> 01:13:35,705
And I think I'm
in love with you.

1426
01:13:35,844 --> 01:13:37,778
- What?
- I mean, I'm in love with her.

1427
01:13:37,913 --> 01:13:39,574
- Paolo, what are you doing?
- Telling the truth.

1428
01:13:39,715 --> 01:13:42,582
I'm not gay and I think
I'm in love with you.

1429
01:13:42,718 --> 01:13:44,276
I know I should have said
something before.

1430
01:13:44,420 --> 01:13:46,581
But every time when I started,
it seemed like the wrong time.

1431
01:13:46,722 --> 01:13:50,283
Or maybe I didn't
have the courage.

1432
01:13:50,426 --> 01:13:52,087
But then when you suggested
getting married.

1433
01:13:52,227 --> 01:13:54,991
I just got swept up with the idea
because I wanted more than

1434
01:13:55,130 --> 01:13:58,497
anything to stay.
I wanted to stay with you.

1435
01:13:58,634 --> 01:14:00,795
I know I should have said
something but...

1436
01:14:00,936 --> 01:14:04,303
But, What? You wanted to make a fool?
Out of me first?

1437
01:14:04,440 --> 01:14:06,101
Jacks. You know that's not true.

1438
01:14:06,241 --> 01:14:08,209
I have no idea what's true!

1439
01:14:08,343 --> 01:14:11,073
- Oh, Jacks.
- I trusted you!

1440
01:14:11,213 --> 01:14:14,182
I told you things.
I was naked in your bed!

1441
01:14:14,316 --> 01:14:15,874
Did you know about this?

1442
01:14:16,718 --> 01:14:17,685
- Yes.
- You?

1443
01:14:17,820 --> 01:14:18,787
- No!
- I told you!

1444
01:14:18,921 --> 01:14:20,889
Yes! And now I've lied.

1445
01:14:21,924 --> 01:14:23,983
I can't believe
I trusted any of you!

1446
01:14:25,527 --> 01:14:27,586
Jacks! Please...

1447
01:14:31,834 --> 01:14:32,892
Next.

1448
01:14:39,341 --> 01:14:41,605
- Go away!
- I'm coming in.

1449
01:14:43,412 --> 01:14:45,676
I should be very mad at you.

1450
01:14:45,814 --> 01:14:46,781
I'm sorry.

1451
01:14:48,617 --> 01:14:51,177
I'm just so stupid!
How could I be so stupid?

1452
01:14:51,320 --> 01:14:53,788
You're not stupid, you just saw
what you wanted to see.

1453
01:14:53,922 --> 01:14:55,480
I can't believe I trusted him!

1454
01:14:55,624 --> 01:14:57,592
I can. He's a great guy.
He deserves your trust.

1455
01:14:57,726 --> 01:14:58,886
Don't you dare defend him!

1456
01:14:59,027 --> 01:15:01,587
Look, all I'm saying is what's
really changed about Paolo

1457
01:15:01,730 --> 01:15:02,992
since he told you he was straight?

1458
01:15:03,131 --> 01:15:04,996
- Everything!
- Yes, everything you're used to.

1459
01:15:05,133 --> 01:15:06,395
Everything you're
comfortable with.

1460
01:15:06,535 --> 01:15:07,297
What's that supposed to mean?

1461
01:15:07,436 --> 01:15:09,404
Have you ever considered you
didn't want to see

1462
01:15:09,538 --> 01:15:11,096
how Paolo really felt about you?

1463
01:15:11,240 --> 01:15:12,605
Because that would have
meant breaking your rule.

1464
01:15:12,741 --> 01:15:14,299
- What rule?
- To only have sex with people

1465
01:15:14,443 --> 01:15:17,776
you don't love and to only really
love people you don't have sex with.

1466
01:15:18,714 --> 01:15:20,079
- That's not true.
- Yes, it is.

1467
01:15:20,215 --> 01:15:23,082
Because that way you know
you can't really get hurt.

1468
01:15:24,219 --> 01:15:27,484
Look, Paolo hasn't changed.
He's still the same person.

1469
01:15:27,623 --> 01:15:30,183
He's still the same person
you know and believe in.

1470
01:15:30,325 --> 01:15:33,988
And think is kind and smart
and sweet and bloody sexy.

1471
01:15:35,330 --> 01:15:38,390
The only thing that's changed is
what might happen between you.

1472
01:15:42,938 --> 01:15:44,405
And he can tango!

1473
01:15:55,117 --> 01:15:56,675
God, babies. You were so right!

1474
01:15:56,818 --> 01:15:59,480
I mean when I think about it now,
he tried to tell me so many times.

1475
01:15:59,621 --> 01:16:01,782
And I just wouldn't let him.
I didn't want to hear it.

1476
01:16:01,924 --> 01:16:03,585
I didn't want to see it!
I was so blind!

1477
01:16:03,725 --> 01:16:04,783
Watch out!

1478
01:16:09,831 --> 01:16:12,391
- What time is it?
- 5:30. What time's his flight?

1479
01:16:12,534 --> 01:16:14,297
6! Hold on, babies.

1480
01:16:38,927 --> 01:16:40,690
- Ticket?
- Oh, I'm not flying.

1481
01:16:40,829 --> 01:16:42,387
Only ticketed passengers
past this point.

1482
01:16:42,531 --> 01:16:44,192
Yes, but I need to speak to
someone on the BA flight

1483
01:16:44,333 --> 01:16:45,994
to Buenos Aires.
It's an emergency!

1484
01:16:46,134 --> 01:16:47,795
Try the BA's customer
service counter.

1485
01:16:47,936 --> 01:16:50,200
- They can call the gate.
- You're a genius!

1486
01:16:52,541 --> 01:16:55,009
I have an emergency message for someone
on your flight to Buenos Aires.

1487
01:16:55,143 --> 01:16:57,077
Flight to Buenos Aires?

1488
01:17:00,215 --> 01:17:03,378
I'm sorry but that flight's
already pulled out of the gate.

1489
01:17:03,518 --> 01:17:05,179
It had an early departure.

1490
01:17:05,320 --> 01:17:06,981
An early departure?

1491
01:17:11,526 --> 01:17:14,290
An early departure?
What are the chances of that?

1492
01:17:14,429 --> 01:17:17,398
If this was a movie, there
wouldn't be an early departure.

1493
01:17:18,533 --> 01:17:21,093
If this was a movie,
you'd be blonde!

1494
01:17:21,236 --> 01:17:23,397
If this was a movie,
you'd be famous!

1495
01:17:24,239 --> 01:17:26,707
That's the problem with life,
it's nothing like the movies.

1496
01:17:31,513 --> 01:17:33,276
I can't believe
you're really going.

1497
01:17:33,415 --> 01:17:35,383
I'm following your advice.
I'm breaking my rules.

1498
01:17:35,517 --> 01:17:36,575
Good for you!

1499
01:17:36,718 --> 01:17:37,980
Are you sure you're
going to be OK?

1500
01:17:38,120 --> 01:17:40,486
Jacks! I'm not a child,
I'll be fine.

1501
01:17:40,622 --> 01:17:42,681
- I worry about you, Babies.
- You worry about everyone.

1502
01:17:42,824 --> 01:17:44,689
No, I worry about you more.

1503
01:17:44,826 --> 01:17:46,384
I just don't want you
to end up alone.

1504
01:17:46,528 --> 01:17:49,588
Well, neither do I.
And stop being so dramatic!

1505
01:17:49,731 --> 01:17:52,199
So stop living your life
like you're in some kind of movie.

1506
01:17:52,334 --> 01:17:53,301
Excuse me?

1507
01:17:53,435 --> 01:17:56,097
Stop trying to cast your true
love instead ofjust meeting him.

1508
01:17:56,238 --> 01:17:58,604
- When I meet him, I'll know.
- I'm not so sure.

1509
01:17:58,740 --> 01:18:00,503
Love isn't always
a lightning bolt, you know?

1510
01:18:00,642 --> 01:18:02,701
Maybe sometimes
it's just a choice.

1511
01:18:02,844 --> 01:18:03,868
Well, that's easy for you to say!

1512
01:18:04,012 --> 01:18:06,173
You're flying to Argentina
to meet the love of your life!

1513
01:18:06,314 --> 01:18:08,874
That's just it. I don't know
that Paolo's the love of my life'

1514
01:18:09,017 --> 01:18:11,281
but I've decided to give him
the chance to be.

1515
01:18:12,921 --> 01:18:14,479
Maybe true love is a decision.

1516
01:18:14,623 --> 01:18:16,784
You know, a decision to take
a chance with somebody.

1517
01:18:16,925 --> 01:18:18,290
To give to somebody.
Without worrying whether

1518
01:18:18,427 --> 01:18:19,985
they'll give anything back.
Or if they're gonna hurt you,

1519
01:18:20,128 --> 01:18:21,891
or if they really are the one.

1520
01:18:22,030 --> 01:18:24,999
Maybe love isn't something
that happens to you.

1521
01:18:25,133 --> 01:18:27,499
Maybe it's something
you have to choose.

1522
01:18:27,636 --> 01:18:28,796
So what do I do?

1523
01:18:28,937 --> 01:18:31,098
Well, you could start by
putting all of those fantasies of

1524
01:18:31,239 --> 01:18:34,800
true love where they belong
into your work of fiction.

1525
01:18:58,834 --> 01:19:00,199
'Love and Other Disasters.'

1526
01:19:00,335 --> 01:19:01,802
Nice title. Catchy.

1527
01:19:01,937 --> 01:19:05,805
But it'll never fit on the marquee.
How aboutjust 'Love Disasters? '

1528
01:19:05,941 --> 01:19:07,101
What?

1529
01:19:07,242 --> 01:19:08,607
I love that Jacks.

1530
01:19:08,744 --> 01:19:11,372
She's got that British
quirkiness audiences love.

1531
01:19:11,513 --> 01:19:12,673
'Hello, Babies! '

1532
01:19:12,814 --> 01:19:15,180
Yes, but technically she speaks
with an American accent

1533
01:19:15,317 --> 01:19:16,375
because she's grown up
in America so...

1534
01:19:16,518 --> 01:19:18,782
Nah, it's too complicated.
Let's make her English.

1535
01:19:18,920 --> 01:19:21,184
- Perfect part for Gwyneth!
- Gwyneth Paltrow?

1536
01:19:21,323 --> 01:19:23,689
Finest English actress of
her generation!

1537
01:19:25,227 --> 01:19:27,787
Brainstorm!
Orlando Bloom as the Mexican.

1538
01:19:27,929 --> 01:19:28,987
Paolo's Argentinean!

1539
01:19:29,131 --> 01:19:32,498
And we'll cover the American
angle with Drew and Cameron.

1540
01:19:32,634 --> 01:19:35,194
Drew Barrymore and
Cameron Diaz? As who?

1541
01:19:35,337 --> 01:19:36,599
Playing David and Tom.

1542
01:19:37,339 --> 01:19:39,307
I'm sorry, you want me to
get rid of the gay story line?

1543
01:19:39,441 --> 01:19:40,305
I don't want you to
get rid of anything!

1544
01:19:40,442 --> 01:19:42,603
I'm just saying instead of
David and Tom,

1545
01:19:42,744 --> 01:19:44,268
we have Daisy and Tina.

1546
01:19:44,913 --> 01:19:46,380
- I...
- Also, you gotta fiddle with that ending.

1547
01:19:46,515 --> 01:19:50,383
We need a bigger movie moment
when Jacks finally connects

1548
01:19:50,519 --> 01:19:52,180
- with Paolo.
- Yes, but...

1549
01:19:52,821 --> 01:19:55,289
Sorry, the whole point is
there is no big movie moment

1550
01:19:55,423 --> 01:19:57,482
because they both discover
that true love is a process

1551
01:19:57,626 --> 01:19:58,888
not an event.

1552
01:20:00,428 --> 01:20:02,293
You know, Peter. I get it.

1553
01:20:02,430 --> 01:20:05,297
This script is like
your baby, isn't it?

1554
01:20:07,035 --> 01:20:08,900
Well, yes, I suppose it is...

1555
01:20:09,437 --> 01:20:12,497
I understand that.
Believe me, I understand that.

1556
01:20:13,241 --> 01:20:14,299
Come here.

1557
01:20:15,043 --> 01:20:16,977
I want to give you some advice!

1558
01:20:18,313 --> 01:20:22,079
You gotta kill your baby!
You gotta fuckin' kill your baby!

1559
01:20:24,719 --> 01:20:27,279
Right. Thank you. Thank you.

1560
01:20:36,431 --> 01:20:37,398
Sorry.

1561
01:20:37,532 --> 01:20:39,193
- Peter!
- David! Hi!

1562
01:20:39,334 --> 01:20:42,497
- How are you?
- Good, good. You?

1563
01:20:42,637 --> 01:20:44,696
Great, I've managed to convince
Sotheby's to transfer me

1564
01:20:44,840 --> 01:20:47,308
back to London.
How's the writing going?

1565
01:20:47,442 --> 01:20:50,070
Good, thanks, I've finally
finished a screenplay.

1566
01:20:50,212 --> 01:20:51,770
Great! What's it about?

1567
01:20:51,913 --> 01:20:54,381
Oh, it's just about some guy
who realizes he's been

1568
01:20:54,516 --> 01:20:56,381
looking for love in
all the wrong places.

1569
01:20:56,518 --> 01:20:59,282
- Like in hotel lobbies?
- Yes, or in his head.

1570
01:21:00,021 --> 01:21:02,182
- Well, congratulations!
- Thank you, thank you.

1571
01:21:02,324 --> 01:21:03,882
You may want to wait
until you've seen the film.

1572
01:21:04,025 --> 01:21:07,688
I don't need to. I'm congratulating you
for having the courage to write it.

1573
01:21:07,829 --> 01:21:11,788
How it turns out or even if
it turns out that's out of your hands.

1574
01:21:12,734 --> 01:21:16,602
- Anyway, take care.
- Yes. You, too.

1575
01:21:30,819 --> 01:21:32,787
It's on the left when we get out.

1576
01:22:02,217 --> 01:22:03,275
David!

1577
01:22:05,520 --> 01:22:06,578
Peter?

1578
01:22:07,322 --> 01:22:08,289
Are you OK?

1579
01:22:08,423 --> 01:22:10,584
No. Actually, I'm very out of
shape and that nearly killed me.

1580
01:22:10,725 --> 01:22:13,387
But I needed to tell you two things.

1581
01:22:14,029 --> 01:22:17,590
First, I'm really sorry
I was so self-absorbed

1582
01:22:17,732 --> 01:22:19,290
when I first met you at brunch.

1583
01:22:19,434 --> 01:22:20,799
You don't have to
apologize to me.

1584
01:22:20,936 --> 01:22:23,700
Oh, no, I'm not apologizing to you.
I'm sorry for my own sake.

1585
01:22:23,838 --> 01:22:26,602
You see, I was so caught up
in my own head.

1586
01:22:26,741 --> 01:22:29,005
I missed out on getting
to know you.

1587
01:22:29,144 --> 01:22:33,274
And I would like to
get to know you.

1588
01:22:33,415 --> 01:22:36,077
I mean if you'd be willing
to give me another chance?

1589
01:22:36,217 --> 01:22:40,779
Maybe let me take you
out for dinner?

1590
01:22:43,325 --> 01:22:44,383
Oh, I don't know.

1591
01:22:45,226 --> 01:22:48,684
See, I've had this fantasy in my
head about having dinner with you.

1592
01:22:49,531 --> 01:22:50,896
What if you don't live up to it?

1593
01:22:56,137 --> 01:22:59,800
Oh well, then I'd just have
to keep taking you out

1594
01:22:59,941 --> 01:23:01,499
until I get it right.

1595
01:23:04,913 --> 01:23:06,278
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

1596
01:23:06,414 --> 01:23:08,279
- French or Italian?
- I think Italian.

1597
01:23:08,416 --> 01:23:09,474
Good.

1598
01:23:30,438 --> 01:23:31,496
Paolo!

1599
01:23:32,841 --> 01:23:33,899
Jacks!

1600
01:23:54,029 --> 01:23:56,395
Paolo, I've been such
a bloody fool!

1601
01:23:56,531 --> 01:23:57,896
Can you ever forgive me?

1602
01:23:58,433 --> 01:24:02,392
Love means always forgiving.

1603
01:24:03,238 --> 01:24:06,298
And I do love you, Paolo!
I do!

1604
01:24:16,518 --> 01:24:18,679
They made me write that ending.

1605
01:24:18,820 --> 01:24:21,084
Apparently, audiences demanded
that Jacks and Paolo have

1606
01:24:21,222 --> 01:24:23,190
this big Hollywood moment.

1607
01:24:23,324 --> 01:24:25,087
I loved that ending.

1608
01:24:26,528 --> 01:24:28,894
How can you love that ending?
It's so artificial!

1609
01:24:29,030 --> 01:24:30,793
It's a lot better than
what really happened!

1610
01:24:30,932 --> 01:24:32,991
I agree, I don't think having
Jacks arrive in Argentina

1611
01:24:33,134 --> 01:24:35,796
with a bad case of diarrhoea
would have had the same impact.

1612
01:24:35,937 --> 01:24:37,302
I loved how I came across.

1613
01:24:37,439 --> 01:24:39,304
You were played
by Drew Barrymore!

1614
01:24:39,441 --> 01:24:41,705
Who totally captured my essence.

1615
01:24:41,843 --> 01:24:44,277
Name was absolutely
brilliant in that.

1616
01:24:45,814 --> 01:24:48,578
Well, I don't like to brag but
I really think I stole the movie!

1617
01:24:48,716 --> 01:24:52,083
I mean, I was funny.
Touching. Eccentric. Real.

1618
01:24:52,220 --> 01:24:54,381
If a little old for the part.

1619
01:24:54,522 --> 01:24:56,683
And I have to applaud your decision
not to show me ending up with James.

1620
01:24:56,825 --> 01:24:58,292
Why? Are you ashamed of
our relationship?

1621
01:24:58,426 --> 01:24:59,188
No, of course not, darling.

1622
01:24:59,327 --> 01:25:00,385
It's just that you were
the villain

1623
01:25:00,528 --> 01:25:02,689
and itjust wouldn't have
felt very believable.

1624
01:25:02,831 --> 01:25:05,299
- What a clever boy you are!
- Thank you.

1625
01:25:05,433 --> 01:25:07,993
Making Talullah and her mother
look the same age!

1626
01:25:08,136 --> 01:25:10,195
That's very modern, Paul!

1627
01:25:10,338 --> 01:25:12,397
I'm so sorry!
My shoot went over!

1628
01:25:12,540 --> 01:25:14,007
You just missed
the story of our lives.

1629
01:25:14,142 --> 01:25:15,200
But with better lighting!

1630
01:25:15,343 --> 01:25:17,971
Everyone knows I wasn't the one
who reported Paolo to immigration, right?

1631
01:25:18,113 --> 01:25:18,772
Yes, darling, we know.

1632
01:25:18,913 --> 01:25:19,971
Well, I think this calls for champagne!

1633
01:25:20,115 --> 01:25:22,675
Oh, right! Claridge's, turn left!

1634
01:25:32,327 --> 01:25:34,192
- Babies, what's wrong?
- Nothing.

1635
01:25:34,329 --> 01:25:37,093
You wrote a screenplay.
And they made a movie out of it!

1636
01:25:37,232 --> 01:25:39,496
I know and I should be grateful.
Look, I'm very lucky.

1637
01:25:39,634 --> 01:25:41,693
It's just...
I don't know.

1638
01:25:41,836 --> 01:25:43,997
I just wanted to tell the truth
and somewhere along the line

1639
01:25:44,139 --> 01:25:45,299
it got mixed up with
a bunch of lies.

1640
01:25:45,440 --> 01:25:49,399
Nobody goes to the movies for
truth except possibly the French!

1641
01:25:49,544 --> 01:25:52,479
The truth is way too complicated.
And unsatisfying.

1642
01:25:52,614 --> 01:25:54,081
And hard to believe.

1643
01:25:55,016 --> 01:25:56,381
- Oh, my God!
- What?

1644
01:25:56,518 --> 01:25:58,281
- I think my waterjust broke.
- What?

1645
01:25:58,419 --> 01:26:02,082
I know, it's impossible, right?
I'm not due for another 3 weeks!

1646
01:26:03,224 --> 01:26:05,283
Paolo! Paolo!
She's having the baby now!

1647
01:26:05,426 --> 01:26:07,894
Call an ambulance!
Call a taxi!