1
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:03,400
So, what's new, Eddie?
Anything exciting?
2
00:01:04,100 --> 00:01:07,000
Yeah, we just got those new Nike
SasQuatch drivers into the store,
3
00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:08,500
so that's been kind of cool.
4
00:01:08,600 --> 00:01:12,300
Let me rephrase the question.
You been crushing any pussy?
5
00:01:13,100 --> 00:01:15,500
No, Dad,
I haven't been crushing any pussy.
6
00:01:15,600 --> 00:01:17,100
Seriously, who you booming?
7
00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:19,000
Dad, seriously,
I'm not "booming" anybody,
8
00:01:19,100 --> 00:01:21,000
I'm just kind of dating a little right now.
9
00:01:21,100 --> 00:01:23,100
I don't get you.
You refuse to get married,
10
00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:26,400
yet you don't really enjoy the fruits
of bachelor life.
11
00:01:26,500 --> 00:01:29,400
It's like you're living
in a purgatory over here.
12
00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:31,300
Dad, I don't refuse to get married.
13
00:01:31,500 --> 00:01:34,000
It's just I wanna do it
with the right person, okay?
14
00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:36,200
I'm sorry to ride you, pal.
I just want you to be happy.
15
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:38,800
I hate you to be alone
on Valentine's Day.
16
00:01:38,900 --> 00:01:40,600
I won't be. I'm going to a wedding.
17
00:01:40,700 --> 00:01:42,000
Oh. Now you're talking.
18
00:01:42,100 --> 00:01:44,300
Weddings are a great place
to meet women.
19
00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:46,100
Who's getting married?
20
00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:47,300
Jodi.
21
00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:49,700
Jodi?
22
00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:51,700
What are you...
23
00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:53,200
What?
24
00:01:53,300 --> 00:01:55,000
- Are you serious?
- Dad. Come on.
25
00:01:55,100 --> 00:01:58,800
- Eddie, don't do this to yourself.
- We're still friends.
26
00:01:58,900 --> 00:02:01,300
I'm just saying, watching
your ex-fiancée walk down the aisle
27
00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:04,100
on Valentine's Day might sting a little.
28
00:02:04,700 --> 00:02:06,700
No. We're way past that.
29
00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:09,400
Really. I mean, if anything,
it's gonna be cathartic.
30
00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:10,700
Give me a little closure.
31
00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:14,500
I think it's flat-out wrong,
but maybe I'm just old-fashioned.
32
00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:17,100
Come on, skip the wedding.
You and me, we'll head to Vegas.
33
00:02:17,200 --> 00:02:20,000
Maybe we'll get lucky and tag-team
a couple of broads.
34
00:02:20,100 --> 00:02:22,100
Yeah, I have to say the idea
of a tag team
35
00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:25,000
with my 77-year-old father
is extremely tempting,
36
00:02:25,100 --> 00:02:27,500
but I already RSVP'd, so...
I appreciate the offer.
37
00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:28,600
Come on, come on.
38
00:02:35,900 --> 00:02:37,600
Hey, can I get a beer, please?
39
00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:41,100
- And I will get a Cosmopolitan.
- No problem.
40
00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:44,500
Cosmopolitan?
Isn't that sort of a female-type drink?
41
00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:47,000
Oh yeah. Yeah.
Tammy turned me on to them.
42
00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:49,800
And I pretty much drink
what she drinks, so...
43
00:02:49,900 --> 00:02:51,300
Oh. Really?
44
00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:54,200
Yeah. Happy wife, happy life.
45
00:02:56,500 --> 00:02:58,800
That's a good one.
"Happy wife, happy life." I like that.
46
00:02:58,900 --> 00:03:01,600
- Rhymes. Must be true.
- Yeah. Thank you.
47
00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:05,100
Wow. Look at Jodi.
She looks great, huh?
48
00:03:06,300 --> 00:03:07,400
Yeah, she looks really good.
49
00:03:07,500 --> 00:03:09,500
And she's got the kind of looks
that are gonna last, you know?
50
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:10,900
Look at her mom.
51
00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:12,600
Oh, what a cougar.
52
00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,600
Some good genes there.
53
00:03:16,900 --> 00:03:18,400
Hey. Come on.
54
00:03:18,900 --> 00:03:22,300
Look, you had five years to pull
the trigger with Jodi, okay?
55
00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:25,100
And if I recall, you had plenty
of reasons for calling it off.
56
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,600
Yeah. I know. I'm just trying
to remember what they were.
57
00:03:27,700 --> 00:03:30,100
God, there was a million of them.
58
00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:34,900
"She doesn't like my fantasy football
league. She never shares her food.
59
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:36,800
"She doesn't try anything new."
60
00:03:36,900 --> 00:03:38,900
Man, what are you...
That's not my voice.
61
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:41,500
That's you. That's exactly you.
That's spot-on you.
62
00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:43,100
I don't sound like an Italian mouse.
63
00:03:43,700 --> 00:03:44,600
Little bit.
64
00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:46,300
I do not-a talk-a like this.
65
00:03:46,500 --> 00:03:50,300
Oh, yeah? Okay, remember this one?
"She hates-a Caddyshack-a."
66
00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:52,800
Yeah, and you know why
she hates-a Caddyshack?
67
00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:55,200
'Cause she said that
the gopher looked too fake.
68
00:03:55,300 --> 00:03:56,600
Come on, that would bother you.
69
00:03:56,700 --> 00:03:58,100
Oh, totally. Totally.
70
00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:00,700
Throw away a chance at happiness
because the gopher looks fake.
71
00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,700
Come on, man.
You've never been married.
72
00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:03,900
You're 40 years old.
73
00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:06,900
Eddie, at some point you're just gonna
have to close your eyes and jump.
74
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:09,500
I did it. I'm the happiest guy I know.
75
00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:11,900
- Hey, Eddie.
- Oh, hey.
76
00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:13,600
- How are you?
- I'm good. How are you doing?
77
00:04:13,700 --> 00:04:15,300
Good, good. Are you sad?
78
00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:16,400
No.
79
00:04:16,500 --> 00:04:18,100
Oh, good. Good.
80
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,100
Mac, come on, honey, we gotta go.
Everyone's already at our table.
81
00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:22,600
- Lead the way, gorgeous.
- Is that for me?
82
00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:25,500
- No, that's his.
- Oh. Well, it's mine now.
83
00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:29,500
What table you at, Eddie?
84
00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:33,200
I am at table 34.
85
00:04:33,300 --> 00:04:35,500
- Oh, too bad. We're at 11.
- We're at 11.
86
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:37,100
- Okay. See you later.
- All right.
87
00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:38,400
- Save me a dance.
- Okay.
88
00:04:38,500 --> 00:04:39,500
- Don't forget.
- I won't.
89
00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:41,700
- Mac, come on.
- Bye. Gotta go.
90
00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:53,900
Cheers!
91
00:04:55,700 --> 00:04:57,300
And that was that!
92
00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:10,100
- Excuse me.
- Yeah.
93
00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:12,800
Hey, are you running this whole thing?
94
00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:14,700
Oh, sure.
95
00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:16,700
Walk up to the first homo you see
96
00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:19,200
and assume he's
the wedding coordinator, right? Nice.
97
00:05:19,300 --> 00:05:21,700
- No, no. I didn't mean that.
- Nice stereotype, buddy, nice.
98
00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,100
Did I hear someone
say "wedding coordinator"?
99
00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:25,700
That would be moi.
100
00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:27,300
So, how can I help you?
101
00:05:27,300 --> 00:05:27,700
So, how can I help you?
102
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:37,600
I think there's been a mistake, 'cause
I'm at table 34, but that's the kids' table.
103
00:05:37,700 --> 00:05:41,600
Oh, oh. That's not the kids' table.
That's the singles' table. Enjoy.
104
00:05:49,700 --> 00:05:51,800
Wife couldn't make it, huh?
105
00:05:52,300 --> 00:05:53,600
No wife.
106
00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:55,600
Oh. Divorced?
107
00:05:57,700 --> 00:05:58,700
No.
108
00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,300
Girlfriend?
109
00:06:01,700 --> 00:06:03,700
Kind of in-between right now.
110
00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,900
Sort of playing the field and
keeping my options open, you know?
111
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,600
Hey, mister.
112
00:06:08,700 --> 00:06:10,400
- What?
- Are you gay?
113
00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:13,300
- No.
- Yes! You owe me 10 bucks.
114
00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:15,900
Hold on, hold on. Are you bi?
115
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:18,500
No. No, I'm not bi.
116
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,700
See? It's a tie. We both lose.
117
00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:23,300
Are you like a widow or something?
118
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,200
Yeah. I'm a widow. That's... Yeah.
119
00:06:26,300 --> 00:06:28,800
- Sorry.
- He's full of it. He's gay.
120
00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:30,800
No. I'm not gay.
121
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,800
- Let's play five-in-five, then.
- What is that?
122
00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:36,300
It's where I ask you five questions
in five seconds.
123
00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:38,500
If you're telling the truth,
then you shouldn't have to think.
124
00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:40,400
Yeah. I don't wanna play your game.
Sorry.
125
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:42,100
- Quick. How'd your wife die?
- Murdered.
126
00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:43,400
- How?
- Ice pick.
127
00:06:43,500 --> 00:06:44,700
- They get the guy?
- Yeah.
128
00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:46,300
- What was his name?
- Ronald.
129
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:47,900
Brad Pitt, Russell Crowe. Who's hotter?
130
00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:49,100
Brad Pitt.
131
00:06:49,300 --> 00:06:50,600
- What? I thought you...
- Yeah, we got you.
132
00:06:50,700 --> 00:06:53,300
No, I thought you meant
who's hotter career-wise.
133
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:54,700
You're totally busted.
134
00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,300
- Gay.
- Gay.
135
00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:57,900
You're gay.
136
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,500
And I just want you all to know that
137
00:07:01,300 --> 00:07:04,000
Jodi is the only woman I've ever loved.
138
00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:09,600
And I wanna thank her for letting me
into her fairytale life.
139
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:17,800
And that's not to say I didn't have to
kiss a few frogs before I met my prince.
140
00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:21,200
Cantrow! Did you hear that?
141
00:07:21,300 --> 00:07:26,700
But seriously, Michael has been
the answer to all my prayers.
142
00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:31,700
And quite frankly, he's the only guy
my father ever approved of.
143
00:07:33,100 --> 00:07:35,700
And that's because he's
the first guy she ever went out with
144
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,200
who wasn't a total asshole.
145
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:44,000
All right, all right, okay.
Look, thank you all for coming.
146
00:07:44,100 --> 00:07:45,700
We're gonna have some fun
today, right?
147
00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:40,600
Stop him, he's got my purse!
Somebody stop him!
148
00:08:40,700 --> 00:08:43,100
Hey, stop! Hey, stop! Stop!
149
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:45,100
Fuck off, man!
This has nothing to do with you!
150
00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:46,700
Calm down, buddy, give me the purse.
151
00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:50,500
Back off, man! I swear to God,
I'll cut your fucking head off!
152
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:52,500
- Give me the...
- I will snap you!
153
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:57,900
No, man, that's mine. It's mine!
Hey, man, man, it's mine. It's mine!
154
00:08:58,000 --> 00:08:59,700
It's mine!
155
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:04,700
Shit.
156
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:06,100
Shit!
157
00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:08,200
Oh, God, are you okay?
158
00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:09,800
No, it stings. He Maced me.
159
00:09:09,900 --> 00:09:11,900
It's just my perfume.
160
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:13,400
Shit, I can't believe this!
161
00:09:13,500 --> 00:09:16,700
I've got everything in there.
My credit card, my wallet.
162
00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:20,100
Everything is in that bag.
My license, my keys,
163
00:09:20,300 --> 00:09:22,400
my life.
164
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,800
Yeah, that guy, he's like a freak.
165
00:09:24,900 --> 00:09:27,600
I mean, I just... I tried to stop him, but...
166
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:29,000
Sorry. I almost had him.
167
00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:31,500
No, no, it's not your fault.
168
00:09:33,300 --> 00:09:36,900
I should have, like, punched him
or something. I'm sorry.
169
00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:44,400
Thank you.
It was really cool of you to get involved.
170
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:55,200
- Here. Let me help you with this stuff.
- Oh, thank you.
171
00:09:58,900 --> 00:10:01,200
Oh. I'm sorry. I don't wanna...
172
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:03,600
I don't know what the protocol there is.
173
00:10:03,700 --> 00:10:06,200
It's okay. I got it. No problem.
174
00:10:06,300 --> 00:10:08,600
Okay. Nice undergarment there.
So, there you go.
175
00:10:08,700 --> 00:10:09,900
So, you live around here?
176
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:14,300
Yes, I do. Yeah, I do.
I actually live a couple blocks down.
177
00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:17,400
- Over by Bay City Sports?
- Bay City Sports? I...
178
00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:21,700
Yeah, a big sports... Sort of sporting
goods emporium, over on Van Ness.
179
00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:24,300
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I know that.
- I actually own the place, so...
180
00:10:24,400 --> 00:10:27,000
- Oh, cool.
- Yeah. Yeah, it's fun.
181
00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:30,100
- That's great. Oh, this is me.
- That's you? Okay.
182
00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:32,800
I don't have any money.
He took my wallet.
183
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:34,200
Wait a minute. Here. I got it.
184
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:36,300
Oh, no. I wasn't saying it to...
You've done enough. Really.
185
00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:39,100
No. Here. Please. Please.
I got a five-spot. Here you go.
186
00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:42,300
Go ahead. Take it. I got like hundreds
of dollars in the bank, so I'm good.
187
00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:45,700
- I can't take it, then.
- No, I'm kidding. I do fine.
188
00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:49,100
I mean, I'm not rich, I'm comfortable.
I'm good. Go ahead. Get on the thing.
189
00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:51,200
- Got it.
- All right.
190
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:53,600
- Take it easy.
- Thank you.
191
00:10:53,700 --> 00:10:55,100
All right.
192
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,800
Hey, what's your name?
193
00:10:57,900 --> 00:10:58,900
Lila!
194
00:10:59,100 --> 00:11:03,000
Lila, I'm Eddie! Eddie... Eddie Cantrow!
195
00:11:03,100 --> 00:11:04,100
Okay!
196
00:11:05,500 --> 00:11:06,600
Shit.
197
00:11:16,700 --> 00:11:18,600
Oh, yeah. This is your girl, Eddie.
198
00:11:18,700 --> 00:11:22,200
I've always said you can tell a lot
about a woman by her panties.
199
00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:23,800
When have you ever said that?
200
00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:26,900
I've said it like a mantra.
You just don't pay attention.
201
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:28,000
So, did you get her digits?
202
00:11:28,100 --> 00:11:29,400
No, I didn't get her digits.
203
00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:31,600
The girl had just gotten mugged.
I wasn't gonna hit on her.
204
00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:36,700
Wait a second. She's hot, friendly,
it's Valentine's Day, she's all alone...
205
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:40,300
She has David Bowie, your all-time
favorite musician, pasted on her undies.
206
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:41,700
And you don't think to ask her out?
207
00:11:41,900 --> 00:11:43,700
It was... A lot was going on.
208
00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:47,100
I mean, I had just gotten sprayed
in the eye by a very sting-y perfume.
209
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:48,400
I was disoriented. I was...
210
00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:51,800
And it never occurred to you
to chase the trolley down the street,
211
00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:54,900
waving her underwear
and calling out her name?
212
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:57,900
No! I mean, look,
this girl was incredibly gorgeous.
213
00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,100
There's no way in hell she's single.
214
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:03,100
I'm sure she's got, like, a dot-com
billionaire boyfriend.
215
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:04,900
A billionaire
who makes her do the wash
216
00:12:05,100 --> 00:12:06,800
at a laundromat on Valentine's Day.
217
00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:10,500
Come on, Eddie! She was available.
You wimped out.
218
00:12:11,500 --> 00:12:13,200
Oh, that's my wife.
219
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:14,600
Okay.
220
00:12:16,500 --> 00:12:17,900
Hey, honey.
221
00:12:18,100 --> 00:12:19,100
Yeah.
222
00:12:20,100 --> 00:12:22,600
Okay, sure, you got it. Right away.
223
00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:25,300
All right, guys. I'm on husband duty.
224
00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:27,500
Aunt Flo just arrived at our house.
225
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:28,800
Who's Aunt Flo?
226
00:12:28,900 --> 00:12:31,400
Tammy just got her period,
so gotta pick her up some Maxibons.
227
00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:35,100
Is there anything that she asks you to
do that you don't jump to attention for?
228
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:39,100
No. Why? I wanna make her happy.
That's why I grew out the bangs.
229
00:12:40,500 --> 00:12:42,500
Sorry you let that girl go, Eddie.
Sounded like a keeper.
230
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:44,400
- Thank you, makes me feel better.
- You're welcome.
231
00:12:44,500 --> 00:12:45,500
He speaketh the truth.
232
00:12:45,700 --> 00:12:49,800
All you had to do was ask her out
for coffee or a goddamn piece of pie.
233
00:12:49,900 --> 00:12:52,600
Oh, pie. Yeah, pie really would've
clinched the deal, Dad.
234
00:12:52,700 --> 00:12:55,400
I'm just saying, when you
happen on ass-floss like these,
235
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:56,700
you don't let them get away.
236
00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:59,400
I'm late for a root canal. Be good.
237
00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:07,400
All right, Ralphie, let's go.
238
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,500
Shit. Eddie, what am I doing wrong?
239
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:12,600
All right. First of all, don't ever swing
at the first pitch. You gotta be patient.
240
00:13:12,700 --> 00:13:15,300
- But the ball was right down the middle.
- It was a little high and inside.
241
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:17,500
Hey, pussydick, can you break away
for nine holes?
242
00:13:17,700 --> 00:13:18,900
You know what?
I'm in the middle of something, Dad.
243
00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:21,000
Listen, everybody wants
to hit homers, right?
244
00:13:21,100 --> 00:13:23,100
But the fact is,
a walk's as good as a hit.
245
00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:24,000
- It is?
- Yeah.
246
00:13:24,300 --> 00:13:26,000
That's the worst piece of advice
I ever heard.
247
00:13:26,100 --> 00:13:27,900
- Swing at the next one, slugger.
- No, wait.
248
00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:29,400
You want me to swing or wait?
249
00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:31,800
Listen to me, I'm older than him. Swing!
250
00:13:31,900 --> 00:13:33,000
- Wait.
- Swing!
251
00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:35,700
No, Dad, now you're screwing him up.
252
00:13:37,300 --> 00:13:38,700
Oh, my God.
253
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,500
- Dad, that's her.
- Who?
254
00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:43,200
That's the girl I was telling you
about, Lila. You gotta get out of here.
255
00:13:43,300 --> 00:13:47,100
- Go. Go, go, go.
- Relax. I'm not gonna blow your cover.
256
00:13:47,900 --> 00:13:50,600
But it's nice to put a face to the panties.
257
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:51,800
Where did you get those?
258
00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:56,200
Will you calm down? They're not for me.
I was just gonna bring them by the club!
259
00:13:56,300 --> 00:13:58,500
What?
A guy can't brag about his own kid?
260
00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:02,100
- No, Dad. Dad.
- Give me. Give me.
261
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,500
- Hi.
- Hey.
262
00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:09,000
I was in the neighborhood
looking for a fleece.
263
00:14:09,100 --> 00:14:10,300
What do you think?
264
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:11,900
Excellent taste.
265
00:14:12,500 --> 00:14:14,000
That's my dad.
266
00:14:14,200 --> 00:14:16,100
Hi, Dad.
267
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:18,900
Nice to meet you, Lila.
268
00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:21,500
How do you know my name?
269
00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:23,300
Okay, cat's out of the bag.
270
00:14:24,100 --> 00:14:26,000
My son found your panties
on the sidewalk,
271
00:14:26,100 --> 00:14:28,900
and we've been talking
about you all week.
272
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:31,700
Eddie, give her back
her undies, will you?
273
00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:37,000
Here you go.
I was watching those for you,
274
00:14:37,100 --> 00:14:41,400
hoping you'd come in and claim them.
It worked out.
275
00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:43,400
- Okay.
- We're good now.
276
00:14:43,700 --> 00:14:45,800
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
277
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:48,300
Okay. My work here is done.
278
00:14:49,500 --> 00:14:50,800
Let me go.
279
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:53,100
He's so cute.
280
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,200
Yeah, he is. He's a cutie.
281
00:14:56,700 --> 00:14:58,700
- So, what do you think?
- Well, what are you looking to do?
282
00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:02,700
You looking to just go hiking,
or bopping around town, or...
283
00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:04,600
Little bit of both, probably.
284
00:15:04,700 --> 00:15:07,200
Okay, well, they're both
quick-dry material, which is good,
285
00:15:07,300 --> 00:15:08,900
'cause it wicks away the sweat
from the surface,
286
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:10,300
allows it to evaporate quickly.
287
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:12,800
But if I was gonna go with one,
I'd probably go with the Patagonia,
288
00:15:12,900 --> 00:15:14,900
'cause it's 100% recycled material.
289
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:18,200
Hey, you a pie fan?
290
00:15:21,100 --> 00:15:24,000
A fan of pie? Do you like pie? The...
Pie? Food? Pie.
291
00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:28,200
Oh, pie. Like apple pie, and...
Yeah, I love pie.
292
00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:30,800
Get out of town.
293
00:15:31,100 --> 00:15:33,700
So you're an environmental researcher.
294
00:15:34,700 --> 00:15:36,200
Why do you sound so surprised?
295
00:15:36,300 --> 00:15:40,100
No, it's just, I mean, you know,
you don't really look like
296
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,900
the prototypical scientist type.
297
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:46,100
Well, it's not really that scientific.
It's more, you know...
298
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:49,100
- It's just researching.
- Right. I know. Just research.
299
00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:50,600
Well, it is.
300
00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:54,100
Well, I'm sure you make it sound
much simpler than it is, but...
301
00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:57,100
For us knuckleheads who, you know,
sell baseball gloves...
302
00:15:57,200 --> 00:15:59,400
No, you're not a knucklehead.
303
00:16:00,300 --> 00:16:01,500
Eddie...
304
00:16:03,100 --> 00:16:05,000
Can I be honest with you?
305
00:16:05,100 --> 00:16:06,400
Yeah, sure.
306
00:16:07,900 --> 00:16:12,100
I didn't really need that fleece
that I bought today.
307
00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:15,300
I came in the store today to see you.
308
00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:17,100
Really?
309
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:20,200
- Yeah.
- Oh, cool.
310
00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:23,800
I mean, if you wanna return the fleece,
it's fine, seriously.
311
00:16:23,900 --> 00:16:26,100
Oh, no, Eddie, I don't.
I don't wanna return it.
312
00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:27,700
Okay, but just know
that that's okay, too.
313
00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:29,900
- No, I love it.
- I mean, aside from all of this other...
314
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:33,700
Eddie, I think it's perfect for me.
315
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:43,600
You're not mad?
316
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:45,600
Of course I'm not mad.
317
00:17:45,700 --> 00:17:48,600
I don't want you to do anything
you're not comfortable with. Come on.
318
00:17:48,700 --> 00:17:51,800
I know it's silly. I mean,
it's not like I'm a virgin or anything.
319
00:17:51,900 --> 00:17:55,000
Lila, you don't owe me
any explanations, okay? Really.
320
00:17:55,100 --> 00:17:58,100
I know, but I just want you
to understand where I'm coming from.
321
00:17:58,200 --> 00:17:59,400
I just...
322
00:17:59,500 --> 00:18:02,800
I've seen how sleeping together
too soon can ruin a relationship,
323
00:18:02,900 --> 00:18:05,700
and I don't wanna risk what we have.
324
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:09,200
'Cause what we have
is really, really nice.
325
00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:12,800
Last time I checked,
we're not in a race, right?
326
00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:14,300
Cool.
327
00:18:21,700 --> 00:18:23,500
- All right.
- All right.
328
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:25,700
- Good night.
- Night.
329
00:18:26,100 --> 00:18:27,500
Sleep well.
330
00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:29,100
I will.
331
00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:39,700
Eddie, phone call, Line 3. It's Lila.
332
00:18:42,100 --> 00:18:44,100
Hey, baby, how you doing?
333
00:18:46,300 --> 00:18:47,700
What's wrong?
334
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:51,000
How long do they want you
to live in Rotterdam?
335
00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:52,900
I don't know,
it depends on the restructuring.
336
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,700
- I mean, at least two years.
- Two years?
337
00:18:55,800 --> 00:18:57,100
Maybe more.
338
00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:02,700
Two years?
339
00:19:04,900 --> 00:19:06,300
Why Germany?
340
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:08,300
Holland.
341
00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:12,300
Can't you just tell them,
"I won't do it. I can't do it.
342
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:14,800
"I wanna be a researcher, but I'm not,
you know, I'm not gonna..."
343
00:19:14,900 --> 00:19:17,600
Eddie, this is my career.
I can't say that.
344
00:19:17,700 --> 00:19:20,300
I understand that,
but can't you, like, just say, you know...
345
00:19:20,500 --> 00:19:22,100
Isn't there somebody else
who wants to go?
346
00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:25,000
No, it's either me or this other
researcher, and he's married.
347
00:19:25,100 --> 00:19:26,100
So what?
348
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:29,300
So, they don't move married people.
It's policy.
349
00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:35,800
So what are the negatives?
350
00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:38,700
Well, for one thing,
I've only known her for six weeks.
351
00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:40,200
That's half a summer, Eddie.
352
00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:42,800
I proposed to your mother
after three dates.
353
00:19:42,900 --> 00:19:45,500
She gave me 18
of the best years of my life.
354
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:48,200
You were engaged to Jodi for five years.
What good did that do you?
355
00:19:48,300 --> 00:19:50,000
All right, yeah,
but there's other stuff, too.
356
00:19:50,100 --> 00:19:51,300
Such as?
357
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:54,000
She doesn't have
a great sense of humor.
358
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:55,500
Are you out of your mind?
359
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,600
Funny's a male gene, you idiot.
360
00:19:57,700 --> 00:20:00,400
Haven't you ever noticed,
whenever you see a really funny girl,
361
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:01,700
she's a little mannish?
362
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:06,400
Think about it. Lily Tomlin,
Evelyn DeGeneres, Rosie O'Donnell...
363
00:20:06,500 --> 00:20:08,500
Oh, I got a thing
for Ellen DeGeneres, though.
364
00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:10,400
I do. I have to admit it.
365
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:13,600
I think she's great. I think she's hot.
Great ass.
366
00:20:14,100 --> 00:20:15,100
Check it out.
367
00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:17,500
All right, you know what?
Forget that stuff, okay? She's wonderful.
368
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:20,100
She's an incredible girl.
There's no better. Okay?
369
00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:23,900
Still, just the idea of marriage.
It's just so permanent. You know?
370
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:25,300
It's like...
371
00:20:25,500 --> 00:20:26,500
It's like at the end of the day,
372
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:29,600
I'm choosing between Lila
and all the other women in the world.
373
00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:32,700
You've barely nailed
any of the other women in the world.
374
00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:35,900
You haven't crushed more than three
pussies since you broke off with Jodi.
375
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:39,500
Dad, what is this obsession
with pussy-crushing counting?
376
00:20:39,600 --> 00:20:42,200
I really, I just...
I'm not comfortable with that term.
377
00:20:42,300 --> 00:20:44,400
Sorry. Snatch. Whatever.
378
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:48,100
- Who do you think you are?
- Huh?
379
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:51,400
Just who the hell
do you think you are, Eddie, huh?
380
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:55,500
Sitting here, trying to come up
with reasons not to marry this girl?
381
00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:56,700
You should be thanking God
382
00:20:56,800 --> 00:21:00,000
that a woman this fantastic
would even consider you.
383
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:02,200
Now, unless you wanna be
the 75-year-old dad
384
00:21:02,300 --> 00:21:03,300
at the Little League game,
385
00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:07,400
I suggest you get on with your life,
'cause that's what this is, Eddie. It's life!
386
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:09,800
Life, Eddie. Goes like that.
387
00:21:17,700 --> 00:21:21,200
I now pronounce you man and wife.
You may kiss the bride.
388
00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:43,300
Congratulations, buddy.
You hit a home run.
389
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:45,200
Can you believe it? I did it!
390
00:21:45,300 --> 00:21:49,200
I finally took the plunge.
And you know what? It feels great.
391
00:21:50,100 --> 00:21:51,300
I told you it would.
392
00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:54,100
Thank you. Thank you for talking
some sense into me, man.
393
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,300
I mean, look at this! Look at this.
I'm married to this amazing girl.
394
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:58,600
I got the next three weeks off.
395
00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:00,800
- We're road-tripping it down to Cabo.
- Cabo.
396
00:22:00,900 --> 00:22:01,900
That's it.
397
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,400
- You're in the club.
- I'm in the club.
398
00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:08,100
Hey, when you get down to the hotel,
ask for Uncle Tito.
399
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:10,400
And give him this as a thank you.
400
00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:12,600
Okay, look, remind me again,
who's Uncle Tito?
401
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:13,800
He's a friend of mine.
402
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,200
You know. I always take care of him.
403
00:22:15,300 --> 00:22:17,400
He gives me a big discount
when I go down there.
404
00:22:17,500 --> 00:22:18,800
He knows you're coming.
405
00:22:18,900 --> 00:22:20,500
That's awesome, man. Thank you.
406
00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,400
Honey! My mom finally arrived!
407
00:22:23,500 --> 00:22:25,300
Oh, great! Where is she?
408
00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:28,300
There's my tiger!
409
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:33,000
Give me a hug.
410
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,900
I am so sorry I missed the ceremony.
411
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:42,000
Look at her, so beautiful.
412
00:22:42,100 --> 00:22:45,500
That's the same dress
I wore on my wedding day.
413
00:22:46,500 --> 00:22:47,800
Same designer?
414
00:22:47,900 --> 00:22:50,100
No, it's the very same dress.
415
00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:10,900
Spread out now, Rosie doctor
416
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:13,900
Come cut loose her mama's reins
417
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:17,600
You know playin' blind man's bluff
418
00:23:17,700 --> 00:23:20,300
is a little baby's game
419
00:23:21,300 --> 00:23:23,700
You pick up Little Dynamite
420
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:26,900
I'm gonna pick up Little Gun
421
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:29,700
And together we're gonna go out tonight
422
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:32,700
And make that highway run
423
00:23:34,100 --> 00:23:35,700
You got a pretty good voice there.
424
00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:37,800
Why, thank you, soul mate.
425
00:23:37,900 --> 00:23:38,800
I'm glad you like it,
426
00:23:38,900 --> 00:23:42,600
'cause you're gonna be hearing
a lot of it for the next 40 or 50 years.
427
00:23:43,300 --> 00:23:45,000
Forty or fifty years.
428
00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:47,600
Hey, you know what I was thinking
when we get down there?
429
00:23:47,700 --> 00:23:49,800
We should go out sport fishing.
430
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:52,200
I've always wanted to catch a marlin,
put it up in the store.
431
00:23:52,300 --> 00:23:55,600
- No, baby, I can't do that.
- Why not?
432
00:23:55,700 --> 00:23:59,300
Because I can't do boats.
I get really, really seasick.
433
00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,500
- I'm sorry.
- That's all right.
434
00:24:02,100 --> 00:24:04,200
That's okay. There's a lot of other
fun stuff we can do down there.
435
00:24:04,300 --> 00:24:05,300
Yeah.
436
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,400
I definitely wanna get out of the hotel
a couple of days.
437
00:24:07,500 --> 00:24:09,500
Maybe get a burro, you know?
438
00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:11,700
A Mexican burro? Donkey?
439
00:24:11,800 --> 00:24:14,400
Go up into the mountains?
You know, just have a little adventure.
440
00:24:14,500 --> 00:24:16,000
- Really?
- Yeah.
441
00:24:16,700 --> 00:24:21,200
I kind of thought it would be nice
to just relax on the beach, you know?
442
00:24:22,500 --> 00:24:24,900
I mean, remember, honey,
this is a Third World country.
443
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:26,900
It can be really dangerous.
444
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:30,400
Yeah. Well, I mean, you know.
It's Cabo.
445
00:24:30,500 --> 00:24:32,000
Yeah, exactly.
446
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:35,400
Come on, shake your body, baby
Do that conga
447
00:24:35,500 --> 00:24:37,600
I know you can't control yourself
any longer
448
00:24:37,700 --> 00:24:39,600
Come on, shake your body, baby
Do that conga
449
00:24:39,700 --> 00:24:42,300
I know you can't control yourself
any longer
450
00:24:46,100 --> 00:24:48,300
Fab Five Freddy told me everybody's fly
451
00:24:48,300 --> 00:24:50,400
The DJ's spinning
I said, my my
452
00:24:50,500 --> 00:24:54,500
Flash is fast, Flash is cool
François sez fas, Flashé no do
453
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:59,300
And you don't stop
Sure shot, go out to the parking lot
454
00:25:00,700 --> 00:25:06,300
And I'm ready to take a chance again
455
00:25:07,100 --> 00:25:13,000
Ready to put my love
on the line with you
456
00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:15,700
I'll tell you what I want
What I really, really want
457
00:25:15,800 --> 00:25:18,200
So, tell me what you want
What you really, really want
458
00:25:18,300 --> 00:25:20,400
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna
459
00:25:20,500 --> 00:25:23,100
I wanna really, really, really
Wanna zigazig ha
460
00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:26,900
Muskrat Suzie, Muskrat Sam
461
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:31,800
Do the jitterbug out in muskrat land
And they shimmy
462
00:25:31,900 --> 00:25:33,000
Hey, baby? Honey?
463
00:25:33,100 --> 00:25:36,200
Why don't we turn off the radio
for a little bit, and just sort of...
464
00:25:36,300 --> 00:25:38,800
Sort of vibe out on the wind
465
00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:41,700
and chill out a little?
466
00:25:42,700 --> 00:25:44,500
I've got a better idea.
467
00:25:45,300 --> 00:25:48,100
- Why don't we go find a room and fuck?
- Okay.
468
00:25:52,500 --> 00:25:54,300
- You like that, Eddie?
- Yeah.
469
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,800
- Yeah, you like that, don't you?
- I do.
470
00:25:57,900 --> 00:25:59,500
Tell me how much you like it.
471
00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:03,400
- I like it.
- Then tell me how much you like it!
472
00:26:03,500 --> 00:26:05,000
I like it a lot!
473
00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:09,100
- Do you like that?
- Whoa, yeah. Yeah, I like that.
474
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:10,700
How about that?
475
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:15,000
Ow! No, no, no, no. Oh, no, no. No, no.
No, no, don't like that.
476
00:26:15,100 --> 00:26:18,300
Now I know what to do
when Eddie's a bad boy.
477
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:22,100
Do you think maybe we can switch up
the position a little bit?
478
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:24,200
'Cause I'm starting to get cramped here.
479
00:26:24,300 --> 00:26:25,800
- Yeah.
- Okay, good.
480
00:26:25,900 --> 00:26:28,400
You wanna do the Inverted Corkscrew?
481
00:26:29,100 --> 00:26:30,800
Remind me, again, what's that?
482
00:26:30,900 --> 00:26:34,600
It's just like the Swedish Helicopter,
except you spin me.
483
00:26:35,100 --> 00:26:38,900
Okay. You know what?
I don't... I'm not a big helicopter guy.
484
00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:41,600
No, never mind.
Just Jackhammer me, Eddie.
485
00:26:41,700 --> 00:26:43,400
Okay, I... What's a...
486
00:26:43,500 --> 00:26:45,300
Jackhammer me, Eddie!
Jackhammer me!
487
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:47,700
- What is a...
- Jackhammer me! Jackhammer me!
488
00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:50,600
Hey, hey, I got an idea. You know what?
Guess what. Guess what.
489
00:26:50,700 --> 00:26:53,900
Why don't we just, you know,
do, like, a little missionary position
490
00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:55,500
for a little bit?
491
00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:56,900
What's that?
492
00:26:57,900 --> 00:26:59,300
Missionary position. You know.
493
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:02,300
It's like, you know,
when I'm on top of you,
494
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:05,800
just a regular guy on top of a girl?
Yeah?
495
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:07,300
- Okay.
- Yeah?
496
00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:10,700
Can you Pile Drive me
from that position?
497
00:27:15,400 --> 00:27:17,200
That was so beautiful.
498
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:36,500
Could you not make those little circles?
499
00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:40,200
Just... My skin's kind of
sensitive right now.
500
00:27:42,600 --> 00:27:45,900
Well, what if I made little squares?
501
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,400
I don't think any shapes...
502
00:27:50,500 --> 00:27:53,400
I don't wanna do any shapes
right now, okay?
503
00:27:56,600 --> 00:28:00,600
Is my Eddie Bear gonna be grouchy
for the next 40 to 50 years?
504
00:28:01,900 --> 00:28:04,400
I'm not being grouchy. Honey.
505
00:28:05,300 --> 00:28:06,900
Where you going?
506
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:08,600
Pee-pee.
507
00:28:20,100 --> 00:28:22,500
That wasn't what you think it was!
508
00:28:24,500 --> 00:28:26,300
What? I didn't hear anything.
509
00:28:26,400 --> 00:28:27,700
Oh, good.
510
00:28:28,300 --> 00:28:30,600
'Cause I just queefed, big-time.
511
00:28:35,900 --> 00:28:37,000
Okay.
512
00:28:45,900 --> 00:28:48,500
Mr. Cantrow's awfully quiet
this morning.
513
00:28:49,900 --> 00:28:52,800
Nah, I'm always quiet
in the morning, sort of.
514
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:57,700
I take a little while to get up to steam.
515
00:28:59,100 --> 00:29:02,500
Will you hold my hand while we eat?
I really like that.
516
00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:07,100
Hold your hand? Of course, of course.
517
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,400
Baby. Baby, look.
518
00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:25,100
They're so cute. That's us in 10 years.
519
00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:29,500
Ten? I don't know about that.
I mean, it seems like a little...
520
00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:31,900
I hope it's more than 10 years.
521
00:29:33,100 --> 00:29:35,500
You're probably right.
I'm really bad at math.
522
00:29:35,500 --> 00:29:36,100
You're probably right.
I'm really bad at math.
523
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:40,000
- Eddie, can I ask you something?
- Yeah.
524
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:44,500
Last night,
525
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:50,200
you didn't think I was too hairy
down there, did you?
526
00:29:50,300 --> 00:29:53,500
I know a lot of women shave completely,
but I don't like that.
527
00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:55,500
You know, it makes me feel
like a little girl.
528
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:57,200
But if you want, I could trim it.
529
00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:00,300
And that way you'd be able
to see my kitty ring better.
530
00:30:01,700 --> 00:30:06,100
I don't think so. I mean, I think...
No, that's a good... I could see it.
531
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:09,000
- Was good visibility on it.
- Okay.
532
00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:20,400
You okay?
533
00:30:20,500 --> 00:30:22,400
- Oh, God.
- You all right?
534
00:30:22,900 --> 00:30:24,700
There's the apple juice out the nose.
535
00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:30,100
It's just this stupid deviated septum that
I have, and it just... Everything just...
536
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:31,700
You've got a deviated septum?
537
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:34,100
There was a kid at my camp
who had a deviated septum.
538
00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:36,800
- Oh, really?
- Yeah. He used to snore like a pig.
539
00:30:36,900 --> 00:30:38,000
- Well, I don't snore.
- Good.
540
00:30:38,100 --> 00:30:42,400
But I do have a lot of fluids coming
out of my nose, more than I'd like.
541
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:44,900
We just have to keep you
away from liquids, huh?
542
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:48,300
Baby, look at them. They are so cute.
543
00:30:52,500 --> 00:30:54,000
They are adorable.
544
00:30:54,700 --> 00:30:56,800
Chicken in the bread pan
pickin' out dough
545
00:30:57,700 --> 00:31:00,700
"Granny, does your dog bite?"
"No, child, no"
546
00:31:46,100 --> 00:31:50,100
This is amazing!
It's even better than the brochure.
547
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:51,900
Baby, look at this!
548
00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:55,100
Not too shabby.
549
00:31:57,300 --> 00:31:58,300
Eddie?
550
00:31:58,400 --> 00:31:59,500
Yeah?
551
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:03,200
I need to say something.
552
00:32:05,900 --> 00:32:08,200
I've never been married before,
553
00:32:08,300 --> 00:32:12,000
and I've been wanting everything
to be so perfect that
554
00:32:12,100 --> 00:32:14,700
I think I've been acting a little off.
555
00:32:16,200 --> 00:32:18,900
- Oh... No!
- Yes.
556
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:20,000
Really, I have.
557
00:32:20,100 --> 00:32:23,500
I've been trying so hard to act like
I'm all comfortable with everything
558
00:32:23,600 --> 00:32:27,000
that I think I've gone too far
the other way.
559
00:32:28,500 --> 00:32:30,100
Well, maybe a little.
560
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,400
I mean, but you know what?
I'm nervous, too.
561
00:32:32,500 --> 00:32:35,500
I mean, here we are.
We, you know... We're married.
562
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:38,300
I've never been married before.
We're both new at this.
563
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:39,600
I'm glad you said something.
564
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:43,300
Good. Well, what do you say
we just reset?
565
00:32:43,500 --> 00:32:46,200
I like that. Yeah. Let's just... Reset.
566
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:48,500
Press the TiVo button.
567
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:52,800
- Look at this!
- Oh, my God!
568
00:32:52,900 --> 00:32:57,500
El Mariachi! I love it.
This is the real Mexico, baby!
569
00:33:02,100 --> 00:33:03,100
Here you go.
570
00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:07,900
Por favor, stay close this week with us.
It's our honeymoon.
571
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:11,700
Oh, my God.
They have some major happy hour.
572
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:14,600
Eddie Bear, you go check us in.
I'll get a snack.
573
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:15,800
Okay.
574
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:19,800
Do me a favor, play for her. Go.
Yes, serenade her.
575
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:26,500
Hey look, it's that fruit from the wedding.
576
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:29,500
Hey. What are you guys doing here?
577
00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:32,000
I don't know.
We're on vacation with our parents.
578
00:33:32,100 --> 00:33:33,500
You look disappointed to see us.
579
00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:35,900
What? Did you think
this was a gays-only resort?
580
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:40,000
For your information,
the hot blond over there, she's with me.
581
00:33:40,100 --> 00:33:41,500
That's who I'm gonna
be sleeping with tonight, so...
582
00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:43,400
I'll give you this. It's impressive.
583
00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:45,500
- Yeah.
- How does he do it?
584
00:33:45,600 --> 00:33:48,600
Does he tuck his balls under
or does he tape them up real high?
585
00:33:48,700 --> 00:33:51,000
You know what? Why don't you take
your little Human Genome Project
586
00:33:51,100 --> 00:33:52,200
and hit the road?
587
00:33:52,300 --> 00:33:54,300
You homophobic hobbits.
588
00:33:54,500 --> 00:33:55,600
Punks.
589
00:33:57,900 --> 00:34:00,700
Do you think you could tell me
where I could find Uncle Tito?
590
00:34:00,800 --> 00:34:02,900
Yes. May I ask who is inquiring?
591
00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:05,700
Yeah, my name's Eddie Cantrow,
and I'm a friend of a friend of his.
592
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:07,800
I'm supposed to give him something.
593
00:34:07,900 --> 00:34:09,900
I'm sorry to tell you this,
but he no longer works here.
594
00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:13,100
He's actually in jail
serving six to ten years.
595
00:34:13,700 --> 00:34:15,100
He was caught running cock fights,
596
00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:18,300
and I'm not speaking about
the kind with roosters.
597
00:34:19,500 --> 00:34:20,600
Really?
598
00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:22,800
Screw off! I'm joking, man!
599
00:34:23,500 --> 00:34:26,200
Come on! I am Uncle Tito!
600
00:34:26,300 --> 00:34:27,400
Pleasure to meet you.
601
00:34:27,500 --> 00:34:28,800
You're Uncle Tito! Okay.
602
00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:31,200
You should have seen
the look on your face.
603
00:34:31,300 --> 00:34:33,000
Did you bring the present from Mac?
604
00:34:33,100 --> 00:34:36,400
Yes, I did. Yes.
Here... Yeah, here you go.
605
00:34:36,500 --> 00:34:40,800
It's funny, I... Uncle Tito. I was thinking
of, like, an older, gray-haired...
606
00:34:40,900 --> 00:34:42,200
- Yes.
- I don't know why.
607
00:34:42,300 --> 00:34:45,100
- You like the hair?
- I like it. You got a whole...
608
00:34:52,200 --> 00:34:56,800
Pardon me.
I was wanting to know if we could...
609
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:03,300
Here is the adult sex tape you ordered,
Señor Cantrow.
610
00:35:05,700 --> 00:35:07,500
I will bill it to your room.
611
00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:10,200
Would you like me
to bring up any more?
612
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:13,100
No. Thank you.
613
00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:16,600
Perfecto!
You will have a fun night tonight.
614
00:35:19,500 --> 00:35:21,700
Baby, you've gotta try this Mind Eraser.
615
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:24,300
The guy put in, like,
four shots of Patrón.
616
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:26,900
You are even more sexier
than Mac described.
617
00:35:27,100 --> 00:35:28,300
Thank you.
618
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:30,500
I was not talking to you,
I was talking to him.
619
00:35:30,700 --> 00:35:35,500
Screw off! I'm joking, man!
Come on. You are unbelievably hot.
620
00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:38,200
By the way, please put your jewelry
inside the safe.
621
00:35:38,300 --> 00:35:40,400
I cannot tell you how many
honeymooners come down here
622
00:35:40,500 --> 00:35:41,900
and they lose their rings on the beach.
623
00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:44,400
- It's very sad.
- Okay, thanks for the tip.
624
00:35:44,500 --> 00:35:48,400
Also, Mac's a pal, so I want you to know
I totally set you guys up.
625
00:35:48,500 --> 00:35:50,200
I got you the honeymoon suite.
626
00:35:50,300 --> 00:35:52,000
Hey, all right, thank you!
627
00:35:52,900 --> 00:35:54,500
This is amazing!
628
00:35:55,500 --> 00:35:57,300
How beautiful is this?
629
00:35:57,800 --> 00:36:00,000
Man. Look at that view.
630
00:36:02,700 --> 00:36:04,100
Eddie, think fast!
631
00:36:04,900 --> 00:36:06,700
Honey, come on! Babe!
632
00:36:07,100 --> 00:36:08,500
You could take out an eye
with that thing.
633
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:11,100
Oh, hush, I didn't come close.
634
00:36:11,700 --> 00:36:13,300
Man, look at this place.
635
00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:15,700
Jeez. Wonder how much
the room costs.
636
00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:19,700
Oh, honey, stop worrying about money.
This is our honeymoon.
637
00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:23,200
We're gonna remember this
for the next 40 to 50 years.
638
00:36:23,900 --> 00:36:26,500
You're right.
I'm thinking like a single guy.
639
00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:29,100
I gotta remember
we're a two-income family now.
640
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:31,600
Really? You have a second job?
641
00:36:31,700 --> 00:36:34,200
No, I mean my salary, your salary.
642
00:36:34,300 --> 00:36:36,700
- My salary?
- Yeah. Oh, what?
643
00:36:36,900 --> 00:36:39,100
You wanna keep our finances
separate now?
644
00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:41,400
Honey, I'm a volunteer.
645
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:44,800
Oh, yeah?
Well, how much do volunteers make?
646
00:36:45,900 --> 00:36:47,600
A volunteer is a volunteer.
647
00:36:47,700 --> 00:36:51,600
I help raise money for my
environmental group. I told you this.
648
00:36:55,400 --> 00:36:59,000
So they force volunteers
to move to Rotterdam?
649
00:36:59,500 --> 00:37:01,100
Unmarried volunteers?
650
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:03,100
They don't force them.
651
00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:06,800
But if you wanna get in good with
the company, you gotta play the game.
652
00:37:06,900 --> 00:37:10,500
You told me
you're an environmental researcher.
653
00:37:11,300 --> 00:37:12,600
Yeah, I am.
654
00:37:13,400 --> 00:37:16,800
Unless you don't count wading in
the freezing-cold San Francisco Bay
655
00:37:16,900 --> 00:37:20,100
for three months, measuring PCBs
and getting stung by jellyfish,
656
00:37:20,200 --> 00:37:22,700
which I won't even tell you what
they had to do to take the pain away.
657
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:24,600
They had to pee on me.
658
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:28,400
You get stung by a jellyfish, that makes
you an environmental researcher?
659
00:37:28,500 --> 00:37:31,700
You know what, Eddie? I love my job
and I don't have to defend it to you.
660
00:37:31,800 --> 00:37:34,500
Job? No, no, no. I don't think
you're allowed to call it a job.
661
00:37:34,500 --> 00:37:34,800
Job? No, no, no. I don't think
you're allowed to call it a job.
662
00:37:34,900 --> 00:37:36,800
Oh, really?
And what am I supposed to call it?
663
00:37:36,900 --> 00:37:38,100
A hobby?
664
00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:40,900
- A hobby?
- A hobby. You get paid for a job.
665
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:42,700
- Says who?
- Says the dictionary.
666
00:37:42,800 --> 00:37:45,200
Well, who reads the dictionary?
Not everybody.
667
00:37:45,300 --> 00:37:48,200
Yeah, apparently not! A "job" is a word.
There is a definition for it!
668
00:37:48,300 --> 00:37:50,400
You married me for my money.
669
00:37:50,600 --> 00:37:53,200
What? No, wait a minute, wait a minute.
Don't turn this around.
670
00:37:53,300 --> 00:37:57,000
What's next? You're gonna steal
my purse, like my last boyfriend did?
671
00:37:57,100 --> 00:37:59,000
Your last boyfriend stole your purse?
672
00:37:59,100 --> 00:38:00,800
Duh! You were there!
673
00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:06,000
That was your boyfriend?
That maniac mugger guy?
674
00:38:06,100 --> 00:38:07,300
That was my ex-boyfriend.
675
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:09,700
The crazy guy on the bike
was your ex-boyfriend?
676
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:11,800
- Yes.
- And you didn't tell me this. Why?
677
00:38:11,900 --> 00:38:14,200
Why would I?
You and I were complete strangers.
678
00:38:14,400 --> 00:38:17,000
So... And why was he
stealing your purse?
679
00:38:17,700 --> 00:38:20,300
Because he owed me money,
so I took his wallet.
680
00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:22,000
And I'm not about to leave it
in my apartment,
681
00:38:22,100 --> 00:38:23,500
because then he'd break in
and steal it back.
682
00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:26,700
So I kept it in my purse,
along with his keys and his cell phone.
683
00:38:26,800 --> 00:38:29,500
And let me tell you something else
about my little "hobby."
684
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,500
One day, our kids are gonna
inhabitate this Earth.
685
00:38:32,600 --> 00:38:33,800
And I'm just trying to make sure
686
00:38:33,900 --> 00:38:35,700
that there's some aqua life
left for when they do!
687
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:37,600
- That's not a word.
- What's not a word?
688
00:38:37,700 --> 00:38:39,100
"Inhabitate." Not a word.
689
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:42,600
Oh, really? Why don't you look it up
in your little "dictionary,"
690
00:38:42,700 --> 00:38:46,100
and why don't you look up "shitfuck"
while you're at it?
691
00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:47,700
I will look it up with "shitfuck"!
692
00:38:47,800 --> 00:38:51,300
And guess what?
I won't find "inhabitate" or "shitfuck"!
693
00:38:52,700 --> 00:38:54,100
Fuck! Shit!
694
00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:04,900
Lila?
695
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:26,300
Lila?
696
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:46,400
This is stupid.
697
00:39:46,500 --> 00:39:48,100
Excuse me.
698
00:39:48,300 --> 00:39:49,700
A little help?
699
00:39:50,300 --> 00:39:52,100
Sorry, I dropped my camera.
700
00:39:58,500 --> 00:40:00,200
Doesn't look broken.
701
00:40:00,700 --> 00:40:03,200
No, don't throw it. I'll be right down.
702
00:40:03,300 --> 00:40:04,400
Okay.
703
00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:08,000
- Here you go.
- Thanks.
704
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:10,800
I didn't mean to sneak up on you.
I was...
705
00:40:10,900 --> 00:40:12,700
Oh, yeah. No problem.
706
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:16,600
Was that you this morning
at Reception?
707
00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:18,200
Yeah.
708
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:20,800
That wasn't what it looked like.
709
00:40:20,900 --> 00:40:22,600
Just looked like
you were renting a videotape.
710
00:40:22,700 --> 00:40:26,100
No, no, I know, but I wasn't.
I mean, that wasn't... I wasn't.
711
00:40:26,200 --> 00:40:29,300
You don't have to explain to me.
All right? Boys will be boys.
712
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:33,600
I got a cousin who drives a truck with
a bumper sticker that says "Born Hard."
713
00:40:33,700 --> 00:40:36,100
Right. Okay, but I'm not that guy.
I mean, I'm not...
714
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:37,400
Miranda!
715
00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:41,900
We're getting ready to play Parcheesi!
Please come upstairs.
716
00:40:42,100 --> 00:40:44,000
I'm coming, I'm coming.
717
00:40:45,700 --> 00:40:47,900
- That's my cousin.
- That's your cousin?
718
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:49,900
- We're down here for a family reunion.
- Oh, yeah?
719
00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:54,100
Yeah. My aunt and uncle renew
their wedding vows every year.
720
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:57,400
It's a little hokey, but they're still in love
after 42 years, God bless them.
721
00:40:57,500 --> 00:40:59,300
- So we go along with it.
- That's nice.
722
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:02,900
Yeah. What about you? What's got you
standing out here mumbling to yourself?
723
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:05,300
Running low on your medication?
724
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:06,800
Was I mumbling?
725
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:08,500
- Yeah.
- Audibly?
726
00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:12,200
Miranda!
We are all ready to play Parcheesi.
727
00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:14,100
I'm coming!
728
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:18,100
All right, okay.
Hope your camera's okay.
729
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:19,700
Happy mumbling.
730
00:41:27,100 --> 00:41:28,100
Hey.
731
00:41:28,200 --> 00:41:30,200
I am so sorry.
732
00:41:30,300 --> 00:41:32,600
- No, no, no. Honey, I'm sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.
733
00:41:32,700 --> 00:41:33,700
No, no, no. I'm sorry.
734
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:39,100
Look, really. Look, first of all,
I love that you love the fishes, okay?
735
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:43,500
And I think it's great that you wanna
clean up the ocean, okay?
736
00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:44,900
- Really?
- Yeah.
737
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:47,300
Yeah, I'm just, you know...
738
00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:48,800
- Eddie.
- I got all worked up.
739
00:41:48,900 --> 00:41:50,800
- But you were right, Eddie.
- No, no.
740
00:41:50,900 --> 00:41:53,700
Yes. They should have been paying me
a long time ago.
741
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:55,000
Whatever. Whatever.
742
00:41:55,100 --> 00:41:57,400
No, but really, I mean...
743
00:41:57,500 --> 00:42:01,000
How am I ever gonna get out of debt
if I keep letting them do this to me?
744
00:42:01,100 --> 00:42:03,900
- How are you gonna what?
- Get out of debt.
745
00:42:04,000 --> 00:42:06,400
You're in debt? What kind of debt?
746
00:42:07,100 --> 00:42:10,100
You know, the kind where you owe
a lot of money to people.
747
00:42:10,300 --> 00:42:11,900
How much money?
748
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:16,000
Well, it's not so bad. I mean,
ever since I stopped doing the blow,
749
00:42:16,100 --> 00:42:19,100
it's down to about 26 K.
750
00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:22,500
You had a... You snorted...
751
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:25,000
You had a cocaine problem?
752
00:42:25,400 --> 00:42:27,500
That's how I got
the deviated septum, remember?
753
00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:29,900
You said you had a deviated septum.
You didn't say that you had a...
754
00:42:30,000 --> 00:42:31,000
You know...
755
00:42:31,100 --> 00:42:32,500
Snorting the cocaine.
756
00:42:32,600 --> 00:42:34,400
Yeah, but that's how you get
a deviated septum.
757
00:42:34,500 --> 00:42:36,200
I didn't... Okay.
758
00:42:36,300 --> 00:42:40,600
That kid at camp, he didn't have
a blow problem, you know. He was...
759
00:42:40,700 --> 00:42:42,200
Well, how do you know?
760
00:42:42,300 --> 00:42:45,200
Because he was eight
and he was my bunkmate.
761
00:42:45,300 --> 00:42:47,300
I mean, you know,
I would have been aware...
762
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:49,400
Tell me a little bit more
about this, though.
763
00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:53,500
You know, it's a chapter of my life
that I'm not particularly proud of.
764
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:55,400
Right, right.
765
00:42:55,500 --> 00:42:57,100
But you know what?
766
00:42:57,500 --> 00:43:02,100
If I had to do it all over again,
I wouldn't change a darn thing.
767
00:43:02,200 --> 00:43:04,700
Because it made me who I am today.
768
00:43:04,800 --> 00:43:07,300
And do you know
who I am today, Eddie?
769
00:43:08,500 --> 00:43:10,300
No. Who are you?
770
00:43:10,900 --> 00:43:12,800
I'm Mrs. Edmund Cantrow.
771
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:15,200
Edward.
772
00:43:15,500 --> 00:43:17,700
"Edward"? You didn't tell me that!
773
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:19,700
I... Yeah, Edward.
774
00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:21,800
Well, Mr. Cantrow.
775
00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:25,900
Are there any other dark, dirty secrets
that I should know about?
776
00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:32,300
Cock me. Cock me.
777
00:43:33,500 --> 00:43:35,700
Yeah, you like that, don't you?
778
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:37,600
- You bet.
- Yeah.
779
00:43:37,700 --> 00:43:39,200
Tell me how much you like it.
780
00:43:39,300 --> 00:43:40,900
I still like it a lot.
781
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,000
Yeah. Hit me.
782
00:43:43,700 --> 00:43:44,700
What?
783
00:43:44,800 --> 00:43:45,900
Hit me!
784
00:43:46,300 --> 00:43:48,100
I don't wanna hit you.
785
00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:51,600
Come on, Eddie. I've been a bad girl.
Now hit me!
786
00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:55,300
You've been fine.
I don't wanna hit you, Lila, really.
787
00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:57,800
What's the matter, Eddie,
you a little girl?
788
00:43:57,900 --> 00:43:59,500
- You a little girl?
- No.
789
00:43:59,600 --> 00:44:02,500
- What, love? You got a little pussy?
- What? No!
790
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:06,100
- A pussy! Do you have a pussy?
- No, I don't have a pussy!
791
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:07,600
Well, what are you, a faggot, Eddie?
792
00:44:07,700 --> 00:44:09,300
- Are you a faggot?
- I'm not a faggot!
793
00:44:09,400 --> 00:44:12,000
Well, then, slap me! Slap me like this!
794
00:44:12,100 --> 00:44:14,500
That's right!
795
00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:17,800
What's the matter? I thought little girls
liked getting their nipples pinched.
796
00:44:17,900 --> 00:44:19,000
Don't you...
797
00:44:19,100 --> 00:44:22,300
Yeah! Oh, I love it! Like it rough!
798
00:44:22,400 --> 00:44:27,200
Yes! Yes, Eddie, yes! Cock me!
799
00:44:27,500 --> 00:44:30,400
Cock me! Cock me, Eddie!
800
00:44:30,500 --> 00:44:32,900
I think I am cocking you!
801
00:44:34,700 --> 00:44:38,000
Fuck me like a black guy, Eddie!
Come on!
802
00:44:42,700 --> 00:44:45,600
No! You're not doing it!
803
00:45:06,500 --> 00:45:08,900
Here, put some of this on my back.
804
00:45:11,700 --> 00:45:13,800
- This is mineral oil.
- Yeah.
805
00:45:14,600 --> 00:45:16,600
No, you need sunblock down here.
806
00:45:16,700 --> 00:45:19,700
No, you gotta use oil
if you wanna get savage.
807
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:23,500
Babe, I'm telling you,
the sun's really strong down here.
808
00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:25,800
You need like a 30 or a 35. I got some.
809
00:45:25,900 --> 00:45:27,900
Are you becoming a control freak?
810
00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:32,200
I mean, first the thing about having
to tip the maid every day, and now this?
811
00:45:32,300 --> 00:45:36,100
Forget about it, Eddie. I'll just do it
myself if it's such a problem.
812
00:45:36,200 --> 00:45:38,700
I'm just saying
the sun's really different down here.
813
00:45:38,700 --> 00:45:39,200
I'm just saying
the sun's really different down here.
814
00:45:39,300 --> 00:45:41,300
The sun is the sun, Eddie.
815
00:46:15,300 --> 00:46:16,400
Honey!
816
00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:18,900
Oh, Grouchy Marx, calm down.
817
00:46:25,900 --> 00:46:27,800
Hey, look. He really is with that babe.
818
00:46:27,900 --> 00:46:29,700
Man, she is banging.
819
00:46:30,000 --> 00:46:34,200
That means he was telling the truth
about his wife getting ice-picked.
820
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:36,000
That's messed up.
821
00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:45,600
Eddie, make them go away.
822
00:46:45,700 --> 00:46:47,500
Thank you, no.
823
00:46:47,600 --> 00:46:49,700
- Not now.
- Thank you. We're okay.
824
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:53,100
- We don't want any. Thank you, though.
- Give them money. Give them money.
825
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:56,700
Okay. Here you go. Here you go.
Thank you, but we're fine.
826
00:46:56,800 --> 00:47:00,000
We're just gonna take a little snoozelito.
We snooze, huh?
827
00:47:00,100 --> 00:47:02,100
No, no, no, no. No.
828
00:47:02,200 --> 00:47:05,500
You stop. Stop. No?
829
00:47:11,100 --> 00:47:12,900
It's not my fault.
830
00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:15,400
It's the stupid Mexican ozone!
831
00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:17,600
No. The Mexican ozone
isn't stupid, Lila.
832
00:47:17,700 --> 00:47:19,500
You just needed to wear
some sunscreen.
833
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:21,900
I was trying to get a tan.
834
00:47:22,000 --> 00:47:24,300
No, you were trying to get "savage."
835
00:47:24,400 --> 00:47:26,300
Whose side are you on, Eddie?
836
00:47:26,400 --> 00:47:30,200
- What? What sides are there?
- Mine or the ozone's? Choose one!
837
00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:32,600
I'm on your side, all right?
Just calm down.
838
00:47:32,700 --> 00:47:35,800
Now look, I'm gonna put a little
of this aloe on your back, okay?
839
00:47:35,900 --> 00:47:37,500
Should make you feel better.
840
00:47:38,300 --> 00:47:39,900
You fucking cunt!
841
00:47:41,500 --> 00:47:42,400
Or not.
842
00:47:42,700 --> 00:47:43,600
Hello?
843
00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:46,200
Hey, Pop, it's me.
Listen, is this a good time?
844
00:47:46,300 --> 00:47:48,900
I'm in Vegas. Flew out for the weekend.
845
00:47:50,000 --> 00:47:52,700
Here, I want you to say hi to somebody.
846
00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:56,400
Hi, Eddie, this is Patty!
847
00:47:56,500 --> 00:48:00,100
Yeah, I met your father playing keno.
What a hot ticket.
848
00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:03,700
Hey, I heard you got married.
Congratulations.
849
00:48:03,800 --> 00:48:05,400
Your father says she's amazing.
850
00:48:05,500 --> 00:48:07,500
Not really. Can I talk to my dad?
851
00:48:07,700 --> 00:48:09,000
All right.
852
00:48:09,100 --> 00:48:10,500
What's up? You okay, kid?
853
00:48:10,600 --> 00:48:13,200
No, I'm not okay.
Dad, I got big, big problems here.
854
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:16,000
I think Lila might be...
I think she might be a little off.
855
00:48:19,900 --> 00:48:22,400
Kitty ring? So, let me get this straight.
856
00:48:22,600 --> 00:48:26,000
You think your wife's a nutcase
because on your honeymoon,
857
00:48:26,100 --> 00:48:28,800
in a tropical paradise,
she's singing a lot,
858
00:48:28,900 --> 00:48:31,100
wanting to have sex around the clock,
859
00:48:31,200 --> 00:48:33,800
and, accidentally,
she got a little too much sun?
860
00:48:33,900 --> 00:48:36,200
Well, yeah, but it's a lot worse
than it sounds.
861
00:48:36,200 --> 00:48:38,500
Now listen to me,
and listen to me good!
862
00:48:38,600 --> 00:48:41,900
When your wife on her honeymoon
asks you to cock her,
863
00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:44,300
you cock her good, God damn it!
864
00:48:57,400 --> 00:49:00,400
- Señor Eddie, are you finished?
- Yeah. Thanks, Tito.
865
00:49:00,500 --> 00:49:02,600
Where is your lovely wife this evening?
866
00:49:02,700 --> 00:49:06,200
She got a little too much sun,
so she decided to crash out early.
867
00:49:06,300 --> 00:49:10,100
Are you sure it was the sun
that made her tired, and not you?
868
00:49:11,300 --> 00:49:12,400
You.
869
00:49:13,100 --> 00:49:14,800
- Tito!
- Yes, señorita.
870
00:49:14,900 --> 00:49:17,400
All right, I want another round,
but make it Flytails this time.
871
00:49:17,500 --> 00:49:18,500
No problem.
872
00:49:18,600 --> 00:49:19,700
Hey.
873
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:22,300
Hey! What are you doing
down here at the bar?
874
00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:23,900
VCR break down?
875
00:49:24,600 --> 00:49:27,000
I was starting to chafe. So...
876
00:49:27,100 --> 00:49:29,000
Well, that's the way it goes.
877
00:49:29,100 --> 00:49:30,700
- You're Miranda, right?
- I am.
878
00:49:30,800 --> 00:49:32,100
I'm Eddie.
879
00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:35,700
- Nice to meet you, officially.
- Nice to meet you, too.
880
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:37,200
What's a Flytail?
881
00:49:37,300 --> 00:49:40,200
I've got no idea,
but it's got tequila and a cool name,
882
00:49:40,300 --> 00:49:42,500
so I thought I'd give it a whirl.
883
00:49:42,600 --> 00:49:44,400
I like your thinking.
884
00:49:45,400 --> 00:49:47,400
You know who figured out
how to do it right?
885
00:49:47,500 --> 00:49:50,900
The people who live in the spots
where the rest of us vacation.
886
00:49:51,000 --> 00:49:53,700
Oh, yeah. You mean
like those perma-vacationers.
887
00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:55,100
- Yeah.
- Though, I don't know.
888
00:49:55,200 --> 00:49:56,700
You think they're really having
that good a time?
889
00:49:56,900 --> 00:49:57,900
- Oh, hell yeah.
- Really?
890
00:49:58,000 --> 00:49:59,800
- Oh, of course.
- Really? I don't know.
891
00:49:59,900 --> 00:50:02,600
I mean, I always feel like those people,
like, must be running from something.
892
00:50:02,700 --> 00:50:04,500
They're running from their boring lives.
893
00:50:04,600 --> 00:50:07,500
You know, most people get two or three
weeks of vacation to have fun.
894
00:50:07,600 --> 00:50:10,200
These people, man,
they party all year round.
895
00:50:10,300 --> 00:50:12,400
Yeah. Where are you from?
896
00:50:12,500 --> 00:50:14,800
- Oxford, Mississippi.
- Really?
897
00:50:15,600 --> 00:50:16,600
You don't have an accent.
898
00:50:16,700 --> 00:50:18,300
- Excuse me?
- Yeah?
899
00:50:18,800 --> 00:50:21,100
Are you here on your honeymoon?
900
00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:23,100
Actually, I am.
901
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:25,900
Are you having a good time?
902
00:50:28,500 --> 00:50:33,400
We're having an incredible time.
We're having the time of our lives.
903
00:50:33,500 --> 00:50:36,200
What the hell are you doing down here?
Why don't you go to your room?
904
00:50:38,900 --> 00:50:40,300
She's...
905
00:50:40,400 --> 00:50:42,300
Here are your Flytails.
906
00:50:43,100 --> 00:50:44,000
Thank you!
907
00:50:44,100 --> 00:50:45,800
Sweetheart, will you help me
with the drinks?
908
00:50:45,900 --> 00:50:50,600
Yeah, sure, Dream Weaver.
No problem. Just gonna help her.
909
00:50:51,300 --> 00:50:52,800
Take it easy.
910
00:50:54,300 --> 00:50:57,100
Hey, next time you tell people
we're married,
911
00:50:57,200 --> 00:51:00,000
I'd appreciate
if you at least acted happy.
912
00:51:00,200 --> 00:51:02,500
Yeah, well, actually...
913
00:51:02,600 --> 00:51:04,800
Miranda! Where have you been?
914
00:51:04,900 --> 00:51:07,400
Relax, everybody, I got more booze.
915
00:51:08,200 --> 00:51:10,400
- This is my friend, Eddie.
- Hi.
916
00:51:10,500 --> 00:51:13,500
Hey, how'd you manage
to make a friend down here, Miranda?
917
00:51:13,600 --> 00:51:15,400
I put an ad in the paper.
918
00:51:15,500 --> 00:51:19,200
Eddie, this is my family, starting with
my aunt and uncle, Beryl and Boo.
919
00:51:19,300 --> 00:51:21,300
Beryl and Boo.
It's your anniversary, right?
920
00:51:21,400 --> 00:51:22,900
- That's right.
- Congratulations.
921
00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:24,000
Thank you.
922
00:51:24,100 --> 00:51:27,500
I think that's a beautiful name, Boo.
Is that short for something?
923
00:51:27,600 --> 00:51:28,800
I'm Boo.
924
00:51:29,400 --> 00:51:30,400
Sorry.
925
00:51:30,500 --> 00:51:33,100
- Yeah, it's short for Buford.
- Buford?
926
00:51:33,600 --> 00:51:36,300
Okay.
But why don't they call you "Byoo"?
927
00:51:39,100 --> 00:51:41,600
Byoo! Why didn't we ever think of that?
928
00:51:41,700 --> 00:51:45,100
It's been sitting there for 30 years
and we never even noticed it.
929
00:51:45,200 --> 00:51:49,100
And then you walk up, and boom!
You are a hair-trigger is what you are.
930
00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:51,000
That is too funny.
931
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:55,100
These are my cousins, Buzz and Martin.
932
00:51:55,200 --> 00:51:56,800
- Hello, Mr. Funny, I'm Buzz.
- Pleasure to meet you.
933
00:51:56,900 --> 00:51:59,100
And their lovely wives,
Deborah and Gayla.
934
00:51:59,200 --> 00:52:02,700
I remember you, Eddie.
You're the film buff, right?
935
00:52:02,800 --> 00:52:06,800
And the lovely man in the back is
my Grandpa Anderson.
936
00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:09,100
Hi there.
937
00:52:09,200 --> 00:52:10,400
Well, nice to meet all of you guys.
938
00:52:10,500 --> 00:52:12,700
I'm gonna get running,
but have a great night.
939
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:14,200
- Excuse me, señor.
- Yeah?
940
00:52:14,300 --> 00:52:17,400
You have a round of shots
from your new friends.
941
00:52:18,900 --> 00:52:20,200
Oh! Well!
942
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:22,100
Thank you.
943
00:52:23,400 --> 00:52:25,700
Nope. Deborah and myself will not
be having any, thank you.
944
00:52:25,800 --> 00:52:30,100
Yeah, I think I'm gonna pass also.
I just... Yeah. I think I'm gonna...
945
00:52:30,200 --> 00:52:34,100
Yeah, I don't think you're gonna
get off that easy, sweetheart.
946
00:52:34,600 --> 00:52:35,600
Thank you!
947
00:52:35,700 --> 00:52:38,900
Well, might as well give them
their money's worth. Thank you.
948
00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:41,100
Hey, here's to Beryl and Byoo.
949
00:52:42,100 --> 00:52:43,700
He did it again!
950
00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:46,800
You are too much.
951
00:52:47,900 --> 00:52:52,300
All right, everybody. Are you ready?
Bottoms up!
952
00:52:54,700 --> 00:52:56,800
This is awful! That's, like, awful!
953
00:52:56,900 --> 00:52:58,600
It's like somebody
gets inside your chest
954
00:52:58,700 --> 00:53:00,900
and just like, a guy with, like, a bongo.
955
00:53:01,000 --> 00:53:03,700
And we gotta pay for it!
That's the punchline. Oh, man.
956
00:53:03,800 --> 00:53:05,900
So, Martin, you're
a high school baseball coach.
957
00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:07,900
- Yeah.
- That is so cool.
958
00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:10,200
Boo actually coached the team
before Martin did.
959
00:53:10,300 --> 00:53:12,800
Never missed a game in 28 years.
960
00:53:12,900 --> 00:53:16,000
Well, there were a few games
I wish I had missed.
961
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:19,900
And Miranda coaches
the women's lacrosse team at Ole Miss.
962
00:53:20,000 --> 00:53:20,900
That's right.
963
00:53:21,100 --> 00:53:22,600
- I do.
- You're a lacrosse coach?
964
00:53:22,700 --> 00:53:25,400
- I am.
- That is... Wow. That's...
965
00:53:25,500 --> 00:53:28,000
- So you're a whole family of coaches.
- Yes, we are.
966
00:53:28,100 --> 00:53:30,700
You know, there was a big article about
them in the Oxford Eagle.
967
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:32,900
You could still probably find that online.
968
00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:35,600
That's amazing.
And what about you, Buzz?
969
00:53:35,700 --> 00:53:36,800
I'm not a coach.
970
00:53:36,900 --> 00:53:39,800
I have a couple Subway sandwich shops
in the Oxford area.
971
00:53:39,900 --> 00:53:42,400
And we're about to open up
a third on Route 122.
972
00:53:42,500 --> 00:53:45,800
We find if you keep the tuna fresh,
they'll keep coming back.
973
00:53:45,900 --> 00:53:47,400
At Subway. Oh, I love Subway.
974
00:53:47,500 --> 00:53:49,300
We're also gonna open
a Ruby Tuesday's.
975
00:53:49,500 --> 00:53:50,700
We're gonna take it to the next level.
976
00:53:50,800 --> 00:53:51,900
But that's this, okay?
977
00:53:52,000 --> 00:53:55,000
That's right. Don't let it leave this circle.
978
00:53:55,100 --> 00:53:56,400
That's exciting. That's great.
979
00:53:56,500 --> 00:53:59,100
We wanna keep it all,
you know, class organizations,
980
00:53:59,200 --> 00:54:00,900
good food, served in a hurry.
981
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:03,500
And with metal silverware this time.
982
00:54:03,600 --> 00:54:05,200
- That's cool.
- How about you, Eddie?
983
00:54:05,300 --> 00:54:06,700
You a sports fan?
984
00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:10,700
I am. Actually, I own a sporting goods
store up in San Francisco.
985
00:54:11,300 --> 00:54:12,900
Yeah. I love sports.
986
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:16,000
In fact, I even lost my virginity
on a baseball diamond.
987
00:54:16,100 --> 00:54:18,500
- You're too much. Really?
- Yeah, yeah.
988
00:54:18,600 --> 00:54:21,700
Couple of the older kids
pushed me down, and...
989
00:54:23,600 --> 00:54:25,200
It was not pretty.
990
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:30,300
Did you file charges?
991
00:54:31,100 --> 00:54:32,100
No.
992
00:54:32,200 --> 00:54:35,100
- He was making a joke, Gayla.
- Yeah, I was just...
993
00:54:35,200 --> 00:54:36,800
About anal rape?
994
00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:44,800
You are a pistol.
995
00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:49,700
My point is,
996
00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:51,000
why do we always assume
997
00:54:51,100 --> 00:54:54,200
that the aliens from the spaceships
are people?
998
00:54:55,300 --> 00:54:59,300
Why couldn't they be cows
from that planet?
999
00:54:59,500 --> 00:55:00,700
Right!
1000
00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:02,500
Do you understand what I'm saying?
1001
00:55:02,600 --> 00:55:04,700
So even if the cows are so evolved
1002
00:55:04,800 --> 00:55:08,500
to the point where they're smart enough
to build flying saucers,
1003
00:55:08,600 --> 00:55:11,600
the people on the planet
are probably so far past that
1004
00:55:11,700 --> 00:55:13,500
that they still look down at the cows.
1005
00:55:13,600 --> 00:55:14,600
Perhaps.
1006
00:55:14,700 --> 00:55:18,100
They're saying, "Look at the dumb cows
and their stupid UFOs."
1007
00:55:18,200 --> 00:55:20,900
Or "FO" to them,
because they know what it is.
1008
00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:24,800
- Yes, exactly.
- Hey. So... Here, okay.
1009
00:55:24,900 --> 00:55:28,300
Can I just say, about your family,
apropos of nothing?
1010
00:55:29,100 --> 00:55:31,100
I love them. They're awesome.
1011
00:55:31,200 --> 00:55:32,800
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
1012
00:55:34,200 --> 00:55:35,900
With one exception.
1013
00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:39,100
I get a weird vibe from... Marvin?
1014
00:55:39,200 --> 00:55:40,500
- Martin.
- Martin.
1015
00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:43,100
Yes, I feel like Martin is
1016
00:55:43,200 --> 00:55:46,600
maybe just a little bit of a big,
wet, flapping douchebag?
1017
00:55:46,700 --> 00:55:50,400
- Dude! That's my cousin!
- Just saying. JS.
1018
00:55:50,500 --> 00:55:51,900
- He's cool.
- Come on.
1019
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:56,100
He's... Martin's just got a burr
up his butt lately, 'cause he's...
1020
00:55:57,400 --> 00:56:02,100
'Cause there's this guy back home, Cal.
It's his best friend.
1021
00:56:03,200 --> 00:56:06,200
And up until about a month ago,
we were serious, so...
1022
00:56:06,400 --> 00:56:09,300
I guess it comes to a point where it's
gonna happen or it's not gonna happen.
1023
00:56:09,500 --> 00:56:10,600
Right, right.
1024
00:56:10,700 --> 00:56:14,100
And he or you did not want it
to happen, or...
1025
00:56:14,200 --> 00:56:18,600
He's like one of those guys who likes
his routine a lot, you know, so...
1026
00:56:18,700 --> 00:56:20,500
- So he didn't want...
- He didn't want to mess with that.
1027
00:56:20,600 --> 00:56:25,600
What... So, you mean, like... Marriage?
Like he didn't want to marry you?
1028
00:56:25,700 --> 00:56:27,200
- Can you believe that?
- No.
1029
00:56:27,300 --> 00:56:28,600
No, right?
1030
00:56:28,800 --> 00:56:32,400
What is his deal?
What the hell is wrong with Cal?
1031
00:56:32,500 --> 00:56:36,300
So, anyway, I told him that I thought
we should take a breather.
1032
00:56:36,500 --> 00:56:39,100
And now I'm realizing, with all the time
that we're spending apart,
1033
00:56:39,200 --> 00:56:41,300
how different we really are.
1034
00:56:42,300 --> 00:56:44,800
So, what about you, kind sir?
1035
00:56:45,900 --> 00:56:48,400
Do you have a girlfriend back home?
1036
00:56:49,900 --> 00:56:51,100
Miranda!
1037
00:56:52,900 --> 00:56:54,700
- Where the hell have you been?
- I've been here...
1038
00:56:54,800 --> 00:56:57,600
I've been stomping around
for 45 minutes looking for you.
1039
00:56:57,700 --> 00:57:00,200
Everybody up there in the suite
is passed-out drunk.
1040
00:57:00,300 --> 00:57:01,300
So?
1041
00:57:01,400 --> 00:57:03,600
So, nobody's looking after Peepaw.
1042
00:57:03,700 --> 00:57:05,600
I just caught him urinating
in the hallway.
1043
00:57:05,700 --> 00:57:07,000
Oh, shit!
1044
00:57:07,100 --> 00:57:08,200
You think that's funny, mister?
1045
00:57:08,300 --> 00:57:09,900
How about I have you go up there
and clean it up?
1046
00:57:10,100 --> 00:57:11,200
- Martin.
- Martin, relax.
1047
00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:12,300
Sorry.
1048
00:57:12,500 --> 00:57:14,800
We're gonna go deep-sea fishing
tomorrow. Do you wanna join us?
1049
00:57:14,900 --> 00:57:17,900
Now, hold up, all right? We can't just be
inviting anybody to come along.
1050
00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:20,600
Gotta talk to the captain.
There's weight capacity issues.
1051
00:57:20,700 --> 00:57:23,500
Point is moot.
I can't go anyway, so we're cool.
1052
00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:25,000
Good night.
1053
00:57:25,500 --> 00:57:26,600
Good night.
1054
00:57:26,700 --> 00:57:28,000
I'll see you. Okay.
1055
00:57:28,100 --> 00:57:29,600
I smell something weird out here.
1056
00:57:29,700 --> 00:57:33,200
Smells like somebody's
been hitting the devil's lettuce.
1057
00:57:50,700 --> 00:57:52,500
Where have you been?
1058
00:57:53,500 --> 00:57:55,100
Hi! Hey!
1059
00:57:56,600 --> 00:57:59,500
Honey, I was downstairs.
1060
00:57:59,600 --> 00:58:00,700
Downstairs.
1061
00:58:00,800 --> 00:58:02,800
You left here seven hours ago, Eddie.
1062
00:58:02,900 --> 00:58:04,300
You said you were just going
to have dinner.
1063
00:58:04,400 --> 00:58:06,200
I did! I did. I was right down at the bar.
1064
00:58:06,300 --> 00:58:09,700
I had the chimichangas
and the chalupa sampler on the side.
1065
00:58:09,800 --> 00:58:11,700
Chimichangas don't take that long.
1066
00:58:11,800 --> 00:58:14,800
No, no, they were quick. The chalupas
were a little slow coming out.
1067
00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:17,300
But, honey, what happened was
I met this great older couple
1068
00:58:17,400 --> 00:58:20,400
who found out it was our honeymoon,
and so they offered to buy me a shot
1069
00:58:20,500 --> 00:58:23,100
and this other group a shot, and then
we all ended up having shots, and...
1070
00:58:23,200 --> 00:58:24,400
What other group?
1071
00:58:24,500 --> 00:58:28,500
This other group. Just these rednecks
who were down at the bar.
1072
00:58:28,600 --> 00:58:31,700
But cool rednecks, you know,
like Jimmy Carter types.
1073
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:34,300
Eddie, that still doesn't explain
why you're coming in at 4:00 a.m.
1074
00:58:34,400 --> 00:58:35,800
when the bar closed at 2:00.
1075
00:58:35,900 --> 00:58:38,800
Honey, you said you wanted to sleep,
so I wanted to allow you to rest,
1076
00:58:38,900 --> 00:58:43,100
so I ended up just sitting on the beach
watching the waves all night.
1077
00:58:43,300 --> 00:58:45,500
You were on the beach all this time?
1078
00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:46,600
Yeah.
1079
00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:48,800
- Really?
- Yes. Honey.
1080
00:58:50,100 --> 00:58:51,800
- Eddie Bear.
- Honey.
1081
00:58:52,200 --> 00:58:54,500
I don't want you to be... Careful!
1082
00:58:54,600 --> 00:58:55,600
Okay.
1083
00:58:56,000 --> 00:58:59,300
I'm sorry, honey. I didn't mean
to take it out on you. I just...
1084
00:58:59,400 --> 00:59:01,400
I've been so miserable.
1085
00:59:01,500 --> 00:59:02,600
You know, I have this sunburn.
1086
00:59:02,700 --> 00:59:05,500
I have a pill stuck up my nose.
I can't sleep.
1087
00:59:05,600 --> 00:59:07,900
Wait, what?
You got a pill stuck up your nose?
1088
00:59:08,000 --> 00:59:11,000
Yeah. I tried to take a Tylenol
for the pain, you know,
1089
00:59:11,100 --> 00:59:14,400
and these Mexican pills are so big
that I started choking,
1090
00:59:14,500 --> 00:59:17,800
and then it got stuck
in my stupid deviated septum.
1091
00:59:17,900 --> 00:59:19,600
Wow. Did you try to get it out?
1092
00:59:19,700 --> 00:59:23,800
These crappy tweezers don't work.
It's just stuck.
1093
00:59:23,900 --> 00:59:25,900
Honey. I'm gonna take care
of this, all right?
1094
00:59:26,100 --> 00:59:28,500
- Okay.
- I'm gonna get rid of your little...
1095
00:59:28,600 --> 00:59:31,900
Your little unwanted visitor up there.
Here, go this way.
1096
00:59:32,000 --> 00:59:34,300
- Okay.
- Good. Now tilt back.
1097
00:59:34,400 --> 00:59:36,400
Hey, this is like that game Operation.
1098
00:59:36,500 --> 00:59:37,700
Oh, yeah.
1099
00:59:41,700 --> 00:59:43,600
- You touched my nose!
- Yes, I did.
1100
00:59:43,700 --> 00:59:46,800
- Okay, you gotta hold still, though.
- Okay, okay.
1101
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:54,700
Wow, that's big.
1102
00:59:54,900 --> 00:59:59,200
My face feels so swollen.
I should take the cream off, I think.
1103
00:59:59,300 --> 01:00:00,600
All right.
1104
01:00:01,900 --> 01:00:03,900
That feels so much better.
1105
01:00:04,400 --> 01:00:05,900
How do I look?
1106
01:00:07,300 --> 01:00:08,900
What, is it bad?
1107
01:00:09,500 --> 01:00:11,900
No. It's not that...
1108
01:00:14,400 --> 01:00:15,700
Oh, my God!
1109
01:00:16,700 --> 01:00:19,000
- Honey.
- It's awful!
1110
01:00:19,100 --> 01:00:22,100
Honey! It's not that bad! Babe!
1111
01:00:22,200 --> 01:00:23,800
Lila, come on!
1112
01:00:23,900 --> 01:00:27,000
Lila, they have our credit card.
We're liable for the damages.
1113
01:00:27,100 --> 01:00:30,200
Go away! This is all your fault!
1114
01:00:30,300 --> 01:00:31,600
How is it my fault?
1115
01:00:31,700 --> 01:00:35,100
You threw such a hissy fit
about your stupid sunblock
1116
01:00:35,200 --> 01:00:37,600
that I wanted to prove you wrong!
1117
01:00:38,000 --> 01:00:41,000
You won, okay? Are you happy now?
1118
01:00:41,100 --> 01:00:43,900
- Lila, that's crazy talk.
- I'm ugly!
1119
01:00:44,000 --> 01:00:46,100
Honey, it's just a sunburn!
1120
01:01:03,100 --> 01:01:04,100
Lila?
1121
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:09,100
Lila, come on.
1122
01:01:10,200 --> 01:01:13,300
This is ridiculous.
How long are you gonna stay in there?
1123
01:01:13,400 --> 01:01:17,600
None of your business.
Now leave me alone, Edward.
1124
01:01:19,100 --> 01:01:21,200
Babe, come on, I gotta pee.
1125
01:01:21,300 --> 01:01:22,800
- So?
- Let me in.
1126
01:01:23,400 --> 01:01:25,300
Go pee somewhere else.
1127
01:01:25,500 --> 01:01:27,600
Why don't you go explore Mexico
or something?
1128
01:01:27,700 --> 01:01:31,400
Honey, I don't want to explore Mexico
without you. Come on.
1129
01:01:31,800 --> 01:01:33,700
Well, I wanna be alone.
1130
01:01:34,400 --> 01:01:36,100
Well, you gotta eat.
1131
01:01:36,500 --> 01:01:38,500
Wanna have some breakfast?
1132
01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:40,000
Slide the menu under the door.
1133
01:01:43,800 --> 01:01:45,300
- Hey, you!
- Hey!
1134
01:01:45,400 --> 01:01:47,000
Hey.
1135
01:01:47,100 --> 01:01:49,500
I thought you guys were going
on that fishing expedition.
1136
01:01:49,600 --> 01:01:51,100
We slept in.
1137
01:01:51,200 --> 01:01:54,400
Yeah, I'm out a $150 deposit,
thanks to you, Mr. Party Boy.
1138
01:01:54,900 --> 01:01:57,000
Well, I guess that's how y'all do it
in California, huh?
1139
01:01:57,100 --> 01:02:00,300
You just rock on with no consideration
for other people's plans, right?
1140
01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:02,900
All right, Martin,
stop being such a tightwad.
1141
01:02:03,000 --> 01:02:04,500
We all gonna chip in for the boat.
1142
01:02:04,600 --> 01:02:07,700
I'm not gonna chip in
for no goddamn boat.
1143
01:02:07,800 --> 01:02:10,300
- You gotta hear this one. You tell him.
- No, you. All right.
1144
01:02:10,400 --> 01:02:12,800
Earlier today we were walking on
the beach, having our morning coffee,
1145
01:02:12,900 --> 01:02:14,500
and we got to talking about last night.
1146
01:02:14,600 --> 01:02:17,400
Anyhow, Buzz was just saying how
much fun it was getting to know you.
1147
01:02:17,500 --> 01:02:19,300
- It's really been a pleasure.
- Oh, yeah. Me, too.
1148
01:02:19,500 --> 01:02:20,600
By the way, for his birthday this year,
1149
01:02:20,800 --> 01:02:24,000
we're gonna get Boo
a license plate that says "Byoo"!
1150
01:02:24,100 --> 01:02:25,100
Can you imagine that?
Christmas morning,
1151
01:02:25,300 --> 01:02:27,000
he's gonna open it up,
it's gonna say "Byoo"!
1152
01:02:27,100 --> 01:02:28,500
- No numbers. "Byoo"!
- "Byoo"!
1153
01:02:28,600 --> 01:02:30,400
That's great. He'll love that.
He'll love that.
1154
01:02:30,500 --> 01:02:32,500
But that's a big secret.
Mum's the word, okay?
1155
01:02:32,600 --> 01:02:34,100
Who am I gonna tell?
1156
01:02:34,200 --> 01:02:36,400
- Good to see you.
- Take it easy.
1157
01:02:36,500 --> 01:02:38,800
Eddie, what do you have there?
It looks like you're eating for two.
1158
01:02:38,900 --> 01:02:41,400
Oh, no, no. Yeah. No, no. I just...
1159
01:02:41,500 --> 01:02:46,400
I just wanted to load up on some carbs
this morning, so...
1160
01:02:46,500 --> 01:02:50,000
And eggs, too. Eggs and carbs,
and, you know, full-on...
1161
01:02:50,100 --> 01:02:51,400
Hey, here's something to do.
1162
01:02:51,500 --> 01:02:55,600
There's a double-decker bus running
tours out to a town called Miraflores.
1163
01:02:55,800 --> 01:02:57,600
It's the basil capital of Mexico.
1164
01:02:57,700 --> 01:02:58,800
Let me see that.
1165
01:02:58,900 --> 01:03:00,500
- Did you say "bagel capital"?
- No.
1166
01:03:00,600 --> 01:03:03,200
I've always wondered how they cultivate
and harvest basil. That'd be great.
1167
01:03:03,300 --> 01:03:07,300
- Me, too. Education. No, it's a herb.
- It's a herb. Italian herb.
1168
01:03:07,400 --> 01:03:08,400
She puts it on a lot of
the food she cooks.
1169
01:03:08,500 --> 01:03:09,500
Everything.
1170
01:03:09,600 --> 01:03:11,800
- Oh, everything. I love it. Pesto.
- It's delicious.
1171
01:03:11,900 --> 01:03:14,400
- Is it spicy?
- No, it's not spicy.
1172
01:03:14,500 --> 01:03:16,000
You can order a whole box of it.
1173
01:03:17,300 --> 01:03:19,800
Uncle Tito will take care
of everything. Okay.
1174
01:03:19,900 --> 01:03:23,200
Hey. Listen, Tito, I need you
to do me a big, big favor.
1175
01:03:23,300 --> 01:03:24,800
300 pesos.
1176
01:03:24,900 --> 01:03:26,000
You don't even know what it is yet.
1177
01:03:26,100 --> 01:03:28,400
It is something nasty,
or you would be doing it yourself.
1178
01:03:28,500 --> 01:03:30,000
All right, fine.
1179
01:03:39,100 --> 01:03:41,900
Honey? Is that you?
1180
01:03:45,700 --> 01:03:49,500
Good. I'll open the door,
and you slide it in.
1181
01:04:04,300 --> 01:04:06,100
Thank you.
1182
01:04:07,800 --> 01:04:10,900
Thanks. Okay. A little bit of salsa.
1183
01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:12,000
Are you okay?
1184
01:04:40,300 --> 01:04:41,700
But he keeps nipping at me.
1185
01:05:21,900 --> 01:05:23,000
Lime!
1186
01:05:24,000 --> 01:05:25,400
Oh, my God.
1187
01:05:26,900 --> 01:05:27,900
Good.
1188
01:05:29,300 --> 01:05:30,400
Hello?
1189
01:05:32,800 --> 01:05:37,300
Hey, Mac! Listen, man,
I owe you, buddy. This place is like...
1190
01:05:37,700 --> 01:05:40,200
This is like my favorite place ever!
1191
01:05:40,400 --> 01:05:42,100
I told you you'd love it.
1192
01:05:42,200 --> 01:05:44,700
And the people, the people down here!
1193
01:05:46,000 --> 01:05:47,700
Oh, my God, I know. Aren't they great?
1194
01:05:47,800 --> 01:05:49,700
I'm seriously thinking
I should sell the store
1195
01:05:49,800 --> 01:05:51,100
and open up a place down here.
1196
01:05:51,200 --> 01:05:52,800
I mean, wouldn't that be incredible?
1197
01:05:53,700 --> 01:05:55,000
So, how's Lila?
1198
01:05:55,100 --> 01:05:57,800
- Oh, I'm sorry, your name's Joachim?
- Who?
1199
01:05:57,900 --> 01:05:59,100
Your wife. Lila.
1200
01:06:02,000 --> 01:06:05,300
She's not so good.
She got a little sunburned, so...
1201
01:06:06,200 --> 01:06:08,400
I've been hanging out
with this other girl.
1202
01:06:08,500 --> 01:06:09,600
Yeah.
1203
01:06:10,500 --> 01:06:12,600
Wait. What, are you serious?
1204
01:06:13,500 --> 01:06:16,200
Divorce lawyer?
What the hell are you talking about?
1205
01:06:16,600 --> 01:06:18,000
Do you get a buzz off it?
1206
01:06:28,900 --> 01:06:31,100
I'm telling you, the second we
got married it's like a switch flipped.
1207
01:06:31,200 --> 01:06:32,600
She's a nightmare, Mac.
1208
01:06:32,700 --> 01:06:35,400
Yeah, well, bitches be crazy, man.
You know that.
1209
01:06:35,500 --> 01:06:36,900
Tammy's always flipping switches.
1210
01:06:37,000 --> 01:06:38,100
What are you talking about?
1211
01:06:38,200 --> 01:06:40,200
You're always talking about
how happy you are with her.
1212
01:06:40,300 --> 01:06:43,400
Look, you wanna know the secret
to a happy marriage? Do what I do.
1213
01:06:43,500 --> 01:06:46,600
Plaster on a fake smile,
plow through the next half-century,
1214
01:06:46,800 --> 01:06:50,000
sit back, relax and wait
for the sweet embrace of death.
1215
01:06:50,100 --> 01:06:52,300
- Hey. Wow!
- What about my hips?
1216
01:06:52,900 --> 01:06:54,900
- And my butt?
- Great. I love it. Looks great.
1217
01:06:55,000 --> 01:06:56,400
Where is it?
1218
01:06:59,300 --> 01:07:01,400
- Come on back!
- Yes! I'm coming, Alfons!
1219
01:07:01,500 --> 01:07:04,900
So, this other girl. It doesn't bother her
that you're a newlywed?
1220
01:07:05,000 --> 01:07:08,900
No. I mean, I haven't exactly made it
clear to her yet, but I'm going to.
1221
01:07:09,000 --> 01:07:10,700
I just have to find
the right moment, you know?
1222
01:07:10,800 --> 01:07:11,900
Eddie. Eddie!
1223
01:07:12,000 --> 01:07:13,100
Hold on a second.
1224
01:07:13,200 --> 01:07:16,000
Eddie! Come on, there are sea lions
in the ocean!
1225
01:07:16,100 --> 01:07:17,800
Really? Okay, hang on!
1226
01:07:17,900 --> 01:07:21,700
She found sea lions now, come on!
Isn't that amazing? I gotta go!
1227
01:07:21,800 --> 01:07:25,700
Don't! Eddie, Eddie! Come home!
Come home! Come home, Eddie!
1228
01:07:26,700 --> 01:07:27,700
Wow.
1229
01:07:27,900 --> 01:07:31,800
Ashes to ashes, funk to funky
1230
01:07:31,900 --> 01:07:35,700
We know Major Tom's a junkie
1231
01:07:35,800 --> 01:07:38,900
Strung out in heaven's high
1232
01:07:39,000 --> 01:07:43,200
Hitting an all-time low
1233
01:07:44,400 --> 01:07:46,400
Wow, what a great day.
1234
01:07:46,500 --> 01:07:48,700
I had so much fun.
1235
01:07:49,900 --> 01:07:52,200
Here are your Mexican sombreros.
1236
01:07:54,300 --> 01:07:56,400
Look, the gang's back.
1237
01:07:56,500 --> 01:07:58,000
Basil sniffers.
1238
01:07:58,200 --> 01:07:59,200
Okay, let's hurry up.
1239
01:07:59,400 --> 01:08:01,700
We're supposed to meet everybody
on the veranda in 15 minutes, right?
1240
01:08:01,800 --> 01:08:03,800
Right, right. Okay, good.
1241
01:08:09,200 --> 01:08:10,400
Hey, Dad.
1242
01:08:10,600 --> 01:08:12,700
There's the guy from San Francisco
whose wife was murdered.
1243
01:08:12,800 --> 01:08:14,900
- Where?
- The guy right there.
1244
01:08:15,500 --> 01:08:18,800
Yeah, some crazy guy
hacked her up with an ice pick.
1245
01:08:20,000 --> 01:08:23,200
They caught the dude, though.
Some guy named Ronald.
1246
01:08:24,300 --> 01:08:25,600
Hey, baby!
1247
01:08:26,000 --> 01:08:29,300
Eddie Bear's home!
And boy, do I got a story for you.
1248
01:08:29,400 --> 01:08:31,700
Well, I hope so,
seeing that you've been gone all day.
1249
01:08:31,800 --> 01:08:34,800
Honey. Guess what happened?
I go downstairs to get your breakfast.
1250
01:08:35,000 --> 01:08:36,900
Who do I run into out of the clear blue?
1251
01:08:37,000 --> 01:08:38,800
- Who?
- Yvon Chouinard!
1252
01:08:38,900 --> 01:08:39,900
Who?
1253
01:08:40,000 --> 01:08:42,400
Yvon Chouinard,
big cheese at Patagonia.
1254
01:08:42,500 --> 01:08:43,800
- And?
- And?
1255
01:08:43,900 --> 01:08:46,200
Come on, honey,
Patagonia's like my biggest supplier.
1256
01:08:46,300 --> 01:08:47,800
I carry their entire line. You know that.
1257
01:08:47,900 --> 01:08:50,500
So, Yvon and his buddies
are going out golfing. Water?
1258
01:08:50,600 --> 01:08:51,800
- No.
- They ask me if I want to go.
1259
01:08:51,900 --> 01:08:54,600
So, what am I gonna do?
Say no? No. Right?
1260
01:08:54,700 --> 01:08:56,000
But you didn't bring your clubs.
1261
01:08:56,100 --> 01:08:57,900
I demoed a set! TaylorMade!
1262
01:08:58,000 --> 01:09:01,200
Sweet, too!
Added like 30 extra yards to my drives!
1263
01:09:01,400 --> 01:09:04,000
- Who were the buddies?
- Just a couple of guys.
1264
01:09:04,100 --> 01:09:08,000
This guy Lenny from Akron, insurance
guy. Kind of a stiff, but good golfer.
1265
01:09:08,200 --> 01:09:10,300
And the local Patagonia rep.
1266
01:09:10,500 --> 01:09:12,100
What was his name?
1267
01:09:14,200 --> 01:09:15,600
His name was Six-toe.
1268
01:09:15,700 --> 01:09:17,700
- Six-toe?
- Yeah, Six-toe.
1269
01:09:17,800 --> 01:09:20,700
Amputee.
Lost four toes scaling up Everest.
1270
01:09:20,800 --> 01:09:22,300
Did it without oxygen.
One of those guys.
1271
01:09:22,400 --> 01:09:25,300
By the way, amazingly, he showed me.
Retained the outer toes,
1272
01:09:25,400 --> 01:09:27,100
lost the middle stuff
but kept the balance points,
1273
01:09:27,200 --> 01:09:28,200
which are all you need.
1274
01:09:28,300 --> 01:09:30,200
In fact, he says
it gives him a better swing
1275
01:09:30,300 --> 01:09:31,500
because he swings
right through the ball,
1276
01:09:31,600 --> 01:09:34,000
less resistance. Fascinating guy.
1277
01:09:34,700 --> 01:09:37,700
Eddie, since when has golf
taken seven hours?
1278
01:09:37,900 --> 01:09:40,400
Yeah, well, we got behind
a Korean couple, so...
1279
01:09:40,500 --> 01:09:42,200
But I'll tell you, it actually worked
to my advantage,
1280
01:09:42,300 --> 01:09:44,000
because we got to talk shop,
1281
01:09:44,100 --> 01:09:45,700
and if things pan out
the way I think they might,
1282
01:09:45,800 --> 01:09:48,800
we could be talking about some
really sweet credit terms for the store.
1283
01:09:48,900 --> 01:09:51,800
Why didn't you call me?
I've been worried sick about you.
1284
01:09:51,900 --> 01:09:53,200
Honey, I did!
1285
01:09:53,300 --> 01:09:56,400
You get a mile outside of this place, it's
like trying to get reception on the moon!
1286
01:09:56,500 --> 01:09:59,200
What are you doing?
Are you going somewhere?
1287
01:09:59,300 --> 01:10:03,000
Lila, I just told you, I'm taking them
out to dinner in five minutes.
1288
01:10:03,100 --> 01:10:04,900
When did you say that?
1289
01:10:05,200 --> 01:10:08,500
Okay. First of all, these people...
Let me explain something to you.
1290
01:10:08,600 --> 01:10:12,100
These people, okay, they're primed.
This opportunity... Do you understand?
1291
01:10:12,200 --> 01:10:14,800
This is the head of an incredibly
important outerwear company.
1292
01:10:14,900 --> 01:10:16,100
International, okay?
1293
01:10:16,200 --> 01:10:19,100
They have taken the bait, and now
I just gotta gaff 'em, get 'em in the boat
1294
01:10:19,200 --> 01:10:21,700
and club 'em to death. Kill time, honey.
1295
01:10:21,800 --> 01:10:23,300
Kill time. I can't let the air out.
1296
01:10:23,400 --> 01:10:25,600
Then all the momentum I built up all day
just evaporates.
1297
01:10:25,700 --> 01:10:26,900
By the way, shouldn't take too long,
1298
01:10:27,000 --> 01:10:29,900
because they started dropping back
the shots about two hours ago.
1299
01:10:30,000 --> 01:10:34,000
So... Very interested
in anything anybody has to say.
1300
01:10:34,100 --> 01:10:35,800
So, you know, it's gonna be good.
1301
01:10:35,900 --> 01:10:39,400
All right. Well, hang on a sec.
Let me put on some makeup.
1302
01:10:39,500 --> 01:10:40,900
You're coming?
1303
01:10:41,100 --> 01:10:42,900
Of course I'm coming.
1304
01:10:44,200 --> 01:10:46,000
Yes! Good! Sweet!
1305
01:10:46,200 --> 01:10:50,700
I'll just call down and tell them
to make room for one more on the skiff.
1306
01:10:52,900 --> 01:10:54,300
On the skiff?
1307
01:10:54,900 --> 01:10:59,100
We're going out on this little 12-foot
Zodiac, inflatable job, twilight cruise.
1308
01:10:59,200 --> 01:11:01,100
No, Eddie, I can't go on a boat.
1309
01:11:01,200 --> 01:11:03,200
Oh, crap. That's right.
1310
01:11:03,800 --> 01:11:04,800
You sure?
1311
01:11:04,900 --> 01:11:07,900
Because really, honey, we're only going
a couple miles out past the breakwater.
1312
01:11:08,000 --> 01:11:11,500
Right to where the continental shelf
drops off? It's supposed to be amazing.
1313
01:11:11,600 --> 01:11:15,700
The guy said it's where they filmed
that movie, The Perfect Storm?
1314
01:11:16,900 --> 01:11:21,400
Honey, I'm sorry, I feel really bad,
but there's no way I'd last out there.
1315
01:11:22,200 --> 01:11:24,500
You know what? Screw it. Screw it!
1316
01:11:24,600 --> 01:11:26,400
What am I doing?
I'm on my honeymoon!
1317
01:11:26,500 --> 01:11:27,700
Thank you for getting my head straight.
1318
01:11:27,800 --> 01:11:31,900
- I'm gonna call and cancel. Right now.
- What about the credit terms?
1319
01:11:32,800 --> 01:11:36,500
All right. You know what? Fine. You win.
We do it your way.
1320
01:11:36,600 --> 01:11:40,500
I'll go, finish the deal quickly, come
back, take you out for a late dinner.
1321
01:11:40,600 --> 01:11:42,600
That sound good? All right?
1322
01:11:42,700 --> 01:11:43,700
- Okay.
- Good.
1323
01:11:43,800 --> 01:11:46,800
Also, there's some important stuff
I wanna talk to you about.
1324
01:11:47,000 --> 01:11:49,600
Oh, yeah? Like, good stuff or bad stuff?
1325
01:11:50,700 --> 01:11:53,100
Like, well, you know,
at first you might flinch,
1326
01:11:53,200 --> 01:11:56,600
but then, I think, in the long run,
great stuff.
1327
01:11:57,700 --> 01:12:00,000
- Okay.
- Okay, good.
1328
01:12:00,800 --> 01:12:02,500
- Oh, honey?
- Yeah?
1329
01:12:02,600 --> 01:12:04,500
I'm sorry I swatted you away
this morning.
1330
01:12:04,600 --> 01:12:07,000
I didn't mean to hit you so hard.
1331
01:12:07,500 --> 01:12:09,000
Swatted me away?
1332
01:12:09,600 --> 01:12:12,000
You know, when you were
sitting outside the bathroom door
1333
01:12:12,100 --> 01:12:16,200
after you dropped off the food,
and you put my hand on your schlong?
1334
01:12:16,600 --> 01:12:20,400
You just surprised me, you know?
And I wasn't feeling so well.
1335
01:12:20,900 --> 01:12:23,500
But I promise
I'll make it up to you tonight.
1336
01:12:23,500 --> 01:12:24,600
Super.
1337
01:12:31,300 --> 01:12:33,400
- Hey there, Tito.
- Hey, Señor Eddie.
1338
01:12:33,500 --> 01:12:34,600
How's it going, man?
1339
01:12:34,700 --> 01:12:36,300
- I'm okay.
- Yeah? Sure?
1340
01:12:36,400 --> 01:12:38,900
'Cause you look like you got
a little hitch in your giddyup.
1341
01:12:39,000 --> 01:12:41,600
Oh, that. No, it is a long story.
I will not bore you with it.
1342
01:12:41,700 --> 01:12:44,800
No, no, no. You bore me. Bore me.
Please. I got all the time in the world.
1343
01:12:44,900 --> 01:12:46,400
I'd love to hear. What happened?
1344
01:12:46,500 --> 01:12:49,200
Okay. After I dropped the food off
at your room this morning,
1345
01:12:49,300 --> 01:12:52,400
I placed my penis in your wife's hand
and she smacked it away.
1346
01:12:52,500 --> 01:12:54,800
She nailed me pretty good, too.
1347
01:12:55,700 --> 01:12:57,300
Are you for real?
1348
01:12:58,200 --> 01:13:01,900
What are you doing? You don't just...
You crossed a serious line there.
1349
01:13:02,000 --> 01:13:05,700
That's not acceptable.
You don't do that. Come on.
1350
01:13:07,800 --> 01:13:11,300
Screw off! You're joking, right?
You had me.
1351
01:13:11,400 --> 01:13:12,800
- No.
- That's good!
1352
01:13:12,900 --> 01:13:16,600
No, I'm not joking. That's outrageous!
That's not acceptable behavior.
1353
01:13:16,700 --> 01:13:20,800
You don't just go and take your penis
and put it in my wife's hand.
1354
01:13:21,800 --> 01:13:24,100
Well, when you put it that way...
1355
01:13:24,300 --> 01:13:28,100
Wow, I'm sorry. I feel really bad, okay?
1356
01:13:28,300 --> 01:13:29,900
What were you thinking?
1357
01:13:30,100 --> 01:13:31,100
It's just that, well...
1358
01:13:31,300 --> 01:13:34,700
You come down here and you try
to bribe me with your porno tapes,
1359
01:13:34,900 --> 01:13:38,600
and then I see you running around
with other women on your honeymoon,
1360
01:13:38,700 --> 01:13:43,000
and I just figured that,
"Anything goes with this guy, hey?"
1361
01:13:48,000 --> 01:13:49,600
All right, fine.
1362
01:13:49,800 --> 01:13:52,100
I am sorry
for the misunderstanding, señor!
1363
01:14:02,300 --> 01:14:03,900
- Hey!
- Hey!
1364
01:14:05,300 --> 01:14:07,200
Wow. You look beautiful.
1365
01:14:07,400 --> 01:14:08,500
Thanks.
1366
01:14:10,000 --> 01:14:13,800
- So, you gonna walk me over?
- Yeah. Yeah. Hey, listen.
1367
01:14:15,000 --> 01:14:17,000
I gotta tell you something.
1368
01:14:17,500 --> 01:14:21,300
And it's something I should have said
before, but I didn't, and...
1369
01:14:21,400 --> 01:14:23,200
I know about your wife.
1370
01:14:24,100 --> 01:14:25,300
You do?
1371
01:14:27,200 --> 01:14:28,200
How?
1372
01:14:28,300 --> 01:14:32,400
Beryl and everybody overheard some
people talking about it on the bus.
1373
01:14:32,500 --> 01:14:35,100
They were talking about it on the bus?
1374
01:14:35,200 --> 01:14:36,900
So it's true, then?
1375
01:14:37,300 --> 01:14:42,200
Yeah, but it's really important
for you to know that it is over.
1376
01:14:42,700 --> 01:14:44,400
And I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier.
It's just...
1377
01:14:44,500 --> 01:14:45,900
You know,
at first it didn't even occur to me
1378
01:14:46,000 --> 01:14:47,600
because, you know,
when I first met you...
1379
01:14:47,700 --> 01:14:52,300
And then... I don't know, I didn't realize
I was gonna like you so much.
1380
01:14:53,100 --> 01:14:56,400
And I didn't wanna freak you out, so...
1381
01:14:56,900 --> 01:14:58,700
You wouldn't have freaked me out.
1382
01:14:58,800 --> 01:15:01,200
Really? So you're not mad?
1383
01:15:01,700 --> 01:15:02,700
No.
1384
01:15:04,400 --> 01:15:05,600
I'm sad.
1385
01:15:06,200 --> 01:15:08,400
That must have been horrible.
1386
01:15:09,600 --> 01:15:13,600
It was. It is. I mean, it sucks.
1387
01:15:15,000 --> 01:15:18,800
You're like the coolest person
on the planet.
1388
01:15:20,600 --> 01:15:21,800
Really.
1389
01:15:22,700 --> 01:15:26,100
No, I mean,
I wasn't expecting this reaction.
1390
01:15:26,500 --> 01:15:29,100
- So your whole family knows?
- Yeah.
1391
01:15:32,000 --> 01:15:34,300
I can't imagine they're taking it
as well as you are.
1392
01:15:34,400 --> 01:15:36,100
Of course they are.
1393
01:15:36,500 --> 01:15:39,000
- They just wanna support you.
- Even Martin?
1394
01:15:39,100 --> 01:15:42,200
Boo instructed everybody
not to even bring it up.
1395
01:15:44,700 --> 01:15:45,900
Dynamite!
1396
01:15:50,600 --> 01:15:51,700
The burros.
1397
01:15:51,800 --> 01:15:54,700
You go to the top of a mountain and
they leave you there with a pack of...
1398
01:15:54,800 --> 01:15:56,400
No, all the way up
to the top of the mountain,
1399
01:15:56,500 --> 01:15:57,900
and you can camp out there overnight.
1400
01:15:58,000 --> 01:15:59,600
- By starlight, you make a fire...
- We should do that.
1401
01:15:59,700 --> 01:16:00,900
- Totally. Totally in.
- I'm serious.
1402
01:16:01,000 --> 01:16:03,100
- Anytime.
- We could do it the day after tomorrow.
1403
01:16:03,200 --> 01:16:06,300
That would be... Okay, I have some
things that I have to move around.
1404
01:16:06,400 --> 01:16:09,100
It will be a bit of a headache,
but I can make it happen.
1405
01:16:09,200 --> 01:16:10,200
Buzz.
1406
01:16:10,300 --> 01:16:13,500
Am I the only one who's still
a little bothered by this guy?
1407
01:16:13,600 --> 01:16:14,800
I believe you are.
1408
01:16:15,000 --> 01:16:17,500
All right.
Well, let me ask you this, okay?
1409
01:16:17,600 --> 01:16:20,000
This dude's supposed to be
down here in mourning.
1410
01:16:20,100 --> 01:16:21,900
What's he doing
canoodling with Miranda?
1411
01:16:22,000 --> 01:16:23,600
- And the goat was dead?
- No, no.
1412
01:16:23,700 --> 01:16:26,600
- Really?
- The goat got back up.
1413
01:16:26,700 --> 01:16:31,000
Everybody mourns in their own way.
Why don't you cut him some slack?
1414
01:16:31,100 --> 01:16:32,300
He likes her and she likes him.
1415
01:16:32,400 --> 01:16:34,400
And I don't think
they're breaking any rules, all right?
1416
01:16:34,500 --> 01:16:36,100
I don't trust him.
1417
01:17:18,300 --> 01:17:19,300
Hey.
1418
01:17:20,100 --> 01:17:21,400
- Hi.
- Hi.
1419
01:17:21,600 --> 01:17:22,600
How you doing?
1420
01:17:22,800 --> 01:17:25,600
Honey, I'm sorry
for ruining our honeymoon.
1421
01:17:26,300 --> 01:17:28,000
I'm such a sucky wife.
1422
01:17:28,100 --> 01:17:29,500
No, honey, you're not.
1423
01:17:29,600 --> 01:17:33,900
You're great.
You're an amazing, beautiful person.
1424
01:17:35,400 --> 01:17:38,000
However, I do think we should talk.
1425
01:17:38,800 --> 01:17:41,500
Hold on. I have something for you.
1426
01:17:46,400 --> 01:17:48,600
I love that. Thank you.
1427
01:17:50,200 --> 01:17:53,300
So anyway, I've been thinking...
1428
01:17:53,400 --> 01:17:55,100
Honey, turn it over.
1429
01:18:05,700 --> 01:18:07,400
Did you make this?
1430
01:18:08,100 --> 01:18:09,600
Before we left.
1431
01:18:10,200 --> 01:18:11,300
You made this?
1432
01:18:11,400 --> 01:18:14,300
- You sewed this yourself?
- Yeah.
1433
01:18:14,700 --> 01:18:16,200
And the hearts?
1434
01:18:16,300 --> 01:18:17,800
Your heart and my heart,
1435
01:18:17,900 --> 01:18:19,100
together
1436
01:18:20,200 --> 01:18:21,400
forever.
1437
01:18:23,600 --> 01:18:26,600
So, honey, what did you
wanna talk to me about?
1438
01:18:28,600 --> 01:18:33,200
I want to talk to you
about nothing right now.
1439
01:18:33,300 --> 01:18:37,700
I want you to get some rest
and we'll talk in the morning, okay?
1440
01:18:39,100 --> 01:18:40,600
Give me a kiss.
1441
01:18:40,800 --> 01:18:41,900
Okay.
1442
01:18:42,500 --> 01:18:44,400
Eddie Bear, I love you.
1443
01:18:46,700 --> 01:18:49,600
I love, love, love, love, love...
1444
01:18:50,400 --> 01:18:52,200
Love, love, love.
1445
01:18:53,700 --> 01:18:55,100
- Okay.
- Okay.
1446
01:18:57,500 --> 01:19:00,400
So, what's this important stuff
you wanted to talk to me about?
1447
01:19:00,500 --> 01:19:01,800
Yeah, okay.
1448
01:19:02,000 --> 01:19:03,300
Oh, my God!
1449
01:19:03,400 --> 01:19:05,900
This guac is fucking awesome!
1450
01:19:06,100 --> 01:19:08,200
Is it? That's good. Good.
1451
01:19:08,300 --> 01:19:10,300
Your hand, Eddie.
1452
01:19:13,500 --> 01:19:16,200
Look, I'm just gonna
lay this out there, all right?
1453
01:19:16,300 --> 01:19:19,800
I have not been a good husband.
I've been bad.
1454
01:19:21,700 --> 01:19:25,200
I am so glad to hear you say that, Eddie.
1455
01:19:25,300 --> 01:19:27,500
I mean, I thought I was losing my mind.
1456
01:19:27,600 --> 01:19:29,400
It's like the moment we got married,
1457
01:19:29,500 --> 01:19:33,200
a switch went off
and you became this loony bird.
1458
01:19:33,400 --> 01:19:34,500
Yes! Yes, you're right!
1459
01:19:34,700 --> 01:19:38,100
I did turn into... I've been a loony bird,
and it's not you, it's me.
1460
01:19:38,200 --> 01:19:39,800
This conversation
is all about my deficiencies,
1461
01:19:39,900 --> 01:19:43,900
because as a wife you've been spot-on.
You've been incredible.
1462
01:19:44,000 --> 01:19:46,500
You've been doing everything
a wife should do,
1463
01:19:46,600 --> 01:19:50,000
and any man would be happy
to have a wife like you,
1464
01:19:50,100 --> 01:19:52,700
and kudos to you for putting up with me
1465
01:19:52,800 --> 01:19:55,600
and all of my junk.
1466
01:19:55,700 --> 01:19:57,000
Thank you.
1467
01:19:57,400 --> 01:20:02,100
But the point is, honey, you shouldn't
have to put up with your husband.
1468
01:20:02,900 --> 01:20:05,900
You deserve so much better.
You understand what I'm saying?
1469
01:20:06,000 --> 01:20:08,500
Yeah, you're apologizing.
That's very sweet.
1470
01:20:08,700 --> 01:20:10,800
No. No, I'm not... I'm not...
1471
01:20:12,000 --> 01:20:15,000
Oh, God, that frigging stuff is hot.
1472
01:20:15,100 --> 01:20:16,500
Honey, look...
1473
01:20:17,600 --> 01:20:19,400
In life, sometimes...
1474
01:20:20,500 --> 01:20:21,900
Sometimes we make choices,
1475
01:20:22,000 --> 01:20:26,500
and in retrospect, we realize
the choice wasn't the right choice.
1476
01:20:27,300 --> 01:20:28,900
Not a bad choice, not a good choice,
1477
01:20:29,000 --> 01:20:35,100
just not the correct choice
for the people who are involved.
1478
01:20:35,900 --> 01:20:38,200
What are you getting at, Eddie?
1479
01:20:38,500 --> 01:20:39,500
Lila,
1480
01:20:40,800 --> 01:20:44,000
we're not gonna be happy together
in San Francisco.
1481
01:20:47,400 --> 01:20:51,400
Rotterdam! That's where you gotta be.
It hit me!
1482
01:20:51,500 --> 01:20:53,400
That's where your destiny is.
1483
01:20:53,500 --> 01:20:55,200
Cleaning up the bogs,
1484
01:20:55,300 --> 01:20:57,300
and getting the environment
right over there.
1485
01:20:57,400 --> 01:20:58,400
That's what you should be doing,
1486
01:20:58,600 --> 01:21:02,900
not hanging out in San Francisco
with me, some sporting-goods schmo...
1487
01:21:03,000 --> 01:21:04,300
Oh, my God!
1488
01:21:07,700 --> 01:21:10,400
Are you saying
what I think you're saying?
1489
01:21:10,800 --> 01:21:12,300
I'm saying...
1490
01:21:13,000 --> 01:21:14,000
Lila?
1491
01:21:14,200 --> 01:21:17,100
This is gonna be a good thing, Lila.
1492
01:21:17,200 --> 01:21:19,600
Lila, it's better. It's for the...
1493
01:21:22,500 --> 01:21:26,300
Lila, you got a little piece of tri-tip
coming out here.
1494
01:21:31,000 --> 01:21:34,000
This is so for the best. Do you hear me?
1495
01:21:34,100 --> 01:21:35,800
Can I call my mom?
1496
01:21:35,900 --> 01:21:39,300
Yes, of course!
You wanna call her, go ahead, call her.
1497
01:21:43,600 --> 01:21:45,700
- Hello?
- Mom, it's me.
1498
01:21:46,500 --> 01:21:48,700
No, no, I'm okay. It's just...
1499
01:21:49,700 --> 01:21:51,200
Something's happened.
1500
01:21:51,400 --> 01:21:52,700
Something huge.
1501
01:21:52,800 --> 01:21:55,600
Eddie's moving to Rotterdam with me.
1502
01:21:56,400 --> 01:21:58,100
No, no, wait! No, Lila, no.
1503
01:21:58,200 --> 01:22:01,100
He doesn't wanna be
a sporting-goods schmo anymore!
1504
01:22:01,200 --> 01:22:03,100
Hold on, he wants to tell you himself.
1505
01:22:03,200 --> 01:22:05,000
I didn't want... Hello?
1506
01:22:05,100 --> 01:22:06,100
Hey, Eddie! You having fun?
1507
01:22:06,200 --> 01:22:07,600
Yeah, yeah, we're having a ball.
1508
01:22:07,700 --> 01:22:09,400
And I hear you're moving to Germany?
1509
01:22:09,500 --> 01:22:10,600
No, no.
1510
01:22:10,700 --> 01:22:13,100
See, Lila got a little bit
ahead of herself on that one,
1511
01:22:13,200 --> 01:22:17,700
and I haven't actually gotten through
the entire plan with her, but she...
1512
01:22:18,100 --> 01:22:20,100
You know what? I gotta go.
1513
01:22:20,600 --> 01:22:21,800
I gotta say goodbye, okay?
1514
01:22:21,900 --> 01:22:23,900
- Okay. Yes.
- Love you! Bye!
1515
01:22:24,400 --> 01:22:27,000
- Hey!
- Isn't he the greatest?
1516
01:22:27,100 --> 01:22:28,500
What's that?
1517
01:22:29,500 --> 01:22:33,100
I know. I know.
1518
01:22:33,200 --> 01:22:35,400
- How you guys doing?
- Not too good, actually.
1519
01:22:35,500 --> 01:22:37,200
Beryl and Boo are set
to renew their vows on the terrace
1520
01:22:37,300 --> 01:22:38,600
and we can't find Miranda anywhere.
1521
01:22:38,700 --> 01:22:39,800
Have you seen her?
1522
01:22:39,900 --> 01:22:41,700
Hang on. Honey, who's Miranda?
1523
01:22:41,800 --> 01:22:44,600
Miranda, honey, is their cousin.
Their cousin.
1524
01:22:44,700 --> 01:22:47,700
You know what? Excuse me
for one second. Come here.
1525
01:22:47,800 --> 01:22:52,300
Sorry, Mom. Yeah, no. I don't know.
Just some guys.
1526
01:22:52,400 --> 01:22:55,900
Guys! Guys! What are you doing?
You're killing me here.
1527
01:22:56,400 --> 01:22:57,900
What is this? What's going on?
1528
01:22:58,000 --> 01:23:00,000
Look, Martin, I know you're upset
about this whole thing
1529
01:23:00,100 --> 01:23:01,000
with Cal, Miranda and me.
1530
01:23:01,200 --> 01:23:04,100
But there'll be a time and a place
we can talk about it, but not now.
1531
01:23:04,200 --> 01:23:06,100
I'm about to tell her.
1532
01:23:06,200 --> 01:23:07,600
Who is that?
1533
01:23:08,100 --> 01:23:09,500
It's my wife!
1534
01:23:11,200 --> 01:23:12,200
Wife?
1535
01:23:12,600 --> 01:23:16,000
Guys, what are you, like, snorting
peyote? Come on, it's me. It's Eddie.
1536
01:23:16,100 --> 01:23:18,700
- But your wife was murdered.
- What?
1537
01:23:19,500 --> 01:23:21,500
Those twins.
1538
01:23:22,100 --> 01:23:26,200
They said that your wife was murdered
by a maniac with an ice pick.
1539
01:23:27,100 --> 01:23:28,300
No, no, no, no, no.
1540
01:23:28,500 --> 01:23:30,300
Look, you guys, all you have to know
1541
01:23:30,400 --> 01:23:32,100
is that from the second
I fell in love with Miranda,
1542
01:23:32,200 --> 01:23:34,100
I have not once cheated on her
with my wife, okay?
1543
01:23:34,200 --> 01:23:35,700
And I'm not saying that
to toot my own horn, it's just...
1544
01:23:35,900 --> 01:23:37,600
- I really haven't...
- You sick little prick!
1545
01:23:37,700 --> 01:23:39,100
- Martin! Martin!
- Come here.
1546
01:23:39,200 --> 01:23:42,100
- No, stop!
- Here, take this.
1547
01:23:44,600 --> 01:23:46,000
Hey, what are you doing?
1548
01:23:46,100 --> 01:23:47,400
Get off me!
1549
01:23:47,500 --> 01:23:50,400
You gotta get yourself
right with God, buddy!
1550
01:23:51,800 --> 01:23:54,100
- He is not worth it!
- Get off me! Get off!
1551
01:23:55,000 --> 01:23:56,600
What is going on?
1552
01:23:57,500 --> 01:23:59,300
Eddie, who was that?
1553
01:24:00,000 --> 01:24:01,700
I have absolutely no idea.
1554
01:24:01,800 --> 01:24:04,200
How's your... How's your...
1555
01:24:04,300 --> 01:24:05,700
What do you mean, you have no idea?
1556
01:24:05,800 --> 01:24:07,800
They called you Eddie.
You knew their cousin!
1557
01:24:08,000 --> 01:24:10,900
No, I know. I mean, I know who
they were, they're the Patagonia guys.
1558
01:24:11,000 --> 01:24:14,400
I just didn't understand
why they were so...
1559
01:24:14,500 --> 01:24:16,700
You know, they get so...
Acting like that.
1560
01:24:16,700 --> 01:24:17,900
Eddie, are you okay?
1561
01:24:18,000 --> 01:24:19,600
No! I'm not okay!
1562
01:24:20,500 --> 01:24:23,100
Look, Lila, we're not okay. It's over!
1563
01:24:24,700 --> 01:24:25,700
No!
1564
01:24:26,200 --> 01:24:28,100
Could you please go away?
1565
01:24:28,200 --> 01:24:30,600
- What?
- We're over!
1566
01:24:30,700 --> 01:24:32,600
- What do you mean?
- Stop!
1567
01:24:32,700 --> 01:24:35,600
- What's over?
- Hang on a sec.
1568
01:24:35,700 --> 01:24:38,700
Here! Here you go. Fifty.
Fifty Americano. Please stop, okay?
1569
01:24:38,900 --> 01:24:41,900
Can you... No! No, stop!
1570
01:24:42,000 --> 01:24:45,600
Will you shut up?
We're trying to have lunch here!
1571
01:24:45,700 --> 01:24:49,200
Would you stop? I'm paying
a lot of money to stay at this hotel!
1572
01:24:49,300 --> 01:24:51,400
I'm on my honeymoon.
We just want to have a nice quiet lunch!
1573
01:24:51,500 --> 01:24:52,700
Eddie, Eddie. It's okay.
They're not bothering me.
1574
01:24:52,800 --> 01:24:53,900
No! It's not okay!
1575
01:24:54,000 --> 01:24:57,000
We're newlyweds! We just wanna have
a quiet time together!
1576
01:24:57,100 --> 01:25:00,400
How can we have any good memories
if you guys keep...
1577
01:25:01,200 --> 01:25:04,100
Eddie, Eddie.
It's okay, I am having good...
1578
01:25:06,100 --> 01:25:07,900
Eddie, please sit down!
1579
01:25:12,700 --> 01:25:16,900
Wow, I was starting to wonder
where all that passion had gone.
1580
01:25:17,600 --> 01:25:21,800
Lila, I'm sorry,
but you and I are finished.
1581
01:25:23,000 --> 01:25:27,100
What are you talking about, Eddie?
What about our Rotterdam plans?
1582
01:25:31,100 --> 01:25:33,000
I'm sorry. I'll be right back.
1583
01:25:33,000 --> 01:25:33,300
I'm sorry. I'll be right back.
1584
01:25:33,500 --> 01:25:36,400
Eddie!
You're acting like a loony bird again!
1585
01:25:38,400 --> 01:25:40,800
- Hey.
- Hey.
1586
01:25:41,700 --> 01:25:44,300
Oh, my God!
What happened to your nose?
1587
01:25:44,800 --> 01:25:47,100
- Martin stuck a pepper up it.
- What?
1588
01:25:47,200 --> 01:25:49,200
Look, there's been
a massive misunderstanding.
1589
01:25:49,300 --> 01:25:50,900
I don't mean to be rude, Eddie,
but can this wait?
1590
01:25:51,000 --> 01:25:51,900
No!
1591
01:25:52,100 --> 01:25:54,000
I'm gonna be late
for Beryl and Boo's ceremony.
1592
01:25:54,100 --> 01:25:56,500
Look, my wife was never murdered.
1593
01:25:56,800 --> 01:25:58,900
- What?
- Yeah, my wife, she never died.
1594
01:25:59,000 --> 01:26:02,600
In fact, I never actually said that,
it was just those stupid twins, they...
1595
01:26:02,700 --> 01:26:05,400
What are you saying?
You're not a widower?
1596
01:26:05,500 --> 01:26:07,400
- No...
- No, he's married!
1597
01:26:08,500 --> 01:26:10,200
Martin just told me.
1598
01:26:10,600 --> 01:26:13,500
He's been staying here with his wife
all week!
1599
01:26:14,800 --> 01:26:16,800
What is she talking about?
1600
01:26:17,800 --> 01:26:21,300
It's true, I'm...
But it's over, Miranda. I mean, it's...
1601
01:26:21,500 --> 01:26:22,400
Get away from me.
1602
01:26:22,600 --> 01:26:24,100
Miranda, it's okay.
Will you listen to me, please?
1603
01:26:24,200 --> 01:26:25,900
Get away from me. Leave me alone!
1604
01:26:26,000 --> 01:26:27,500
Miranda!
1605
01:26:29,600 --> 01:26:31,000
Hang on!
1606
01:26:34,200 --> 01:26:35,400
Eddie!
1607
01:26:43,700 --> 01:26:44,800
Shit!
1608
01:26:55,700 --> 01:26:58,300
- Eddie!
- I was trying to tell you before.
1609
01:26:58,400 --> 01:27:01,100
- Leave me alone! Get away from me!
- Miranda!
1610
01:27:01,200 --> 01:27:03,700
Eddie! What the hell is going on?
1611
01:27:03,800 --> 01:27:06,900
Lila, I was trying to tell you before,
and I...
1612
01:27:07,400 --> 01:27:10,100
Did I cut my back on the rocks?
1613
01:27:11,300 --> 01:27:12,800
Oh, my God!
1614
01:27:13,100 --> 01:27:14,600
Man-o'-war!
1615
01:27:14,700 --> 01:27:17,400
Get it off! Get it off!
1616
01:27:30,900 --> 01:27:32,000
Come on, do something.
1617
01:27:32,100 --> 01:27:33,100
I'm not doing anything.
This is what he gets.
1618
01:27:37,700 --> 01:27:41,000
- It's okay! I know what to do.
- What are you doing?
1619
01:27:44,400 --> 01:27:47,200
Get off of me! No! No!
1620
01:27:48,200 --> 01:27:49,300
Oh, my gosh!
1621
01:27:49,400 --> 01:27:50,600
I know what I'm doing!
1622
01:27:50,700 --> 01:27:53,000
- No!
- Eddie!
1623
01:27:54,200 --> 01:27:57,000
- Burning! Burning!
- It's okay!
1624
01:27:57,100 --> 01:27:59,200
It's okay. It's okay.
1625
01:28:00,600 --> 01:28:02,900
I know, honey. Isn't that nice?
1626
01:28:04,700 --> 01:28:05,700
Sick!
1627
01:28:08,500 --> 01:28:11,200
Oh, no! It's okay, I'm his wife.
1628
01:28:11,300 --> 01:28:14,300
- We're on our honeymoon!
- Honeymoon?
1629
01:28:14,400 --> 01:28:17,100
Miranda, it's not what it seems.
1630
01:28:18,800 --> 01:28:21,100
No. Wait, Miranda!
1631
01:28:22,300 --> 01:28:23,900
Miranda!
1632
01:28:33,200 --> 01:28:36,100
I think it was
a confluence of events, you know?
1633
01:28:36,200 --> 01:28:40,300
With my dad busting my balls
about my dating life,
1634
01:28:41,600 --> 01:28:42,900
then going to Jodi's wedding.
1635
01:28:43,000 --> 01:28:47,300
Why did I even go to Jodi's wedding,
you know? Just to torture myself?
1636
01:28:47,800 --> 01:28:51,900
Mac's all up in my grill about being
married. It's just...
1637
01:28:52,900 --> 01:28:55,000
I don't know, I jumped,
you know, I jumped.
1638
01:28:55,100 --> 01:28:59,000
I felt the heat and I jumped, and it was
like two days, three days early.
1639
01:28:59,100 --> 01:29:00,800
And I'll tell you something.
1640
01:29:00,900 --> 01:29:05,600
I should've just gone with my dad to
Vegas and double-teamed those girls.
1641
01:29:05,700 --> 01:29:07,800
That would've been
the decent thing to do.
1642
01:29:08,000 --> 01:29:09,300
Señor Eddie!
1643
01:29:09,800 --> 01:29:16,100
Hey, there he is! Señor Tito!
My Tito-Bandito!
1644
01:29:16,200 --> 01:29:18,100
Eddie, what are you doing?
1645
01:29:18,200 --> 01:29:21,900
I'm just hanging with my brother,
my brother Manuel.
1646
01:29:22,000 --> 01:29:24,000
Eddie, people are looking for you.
1647
01:29:24,100 --> 01:29:27,000
Your father keeps calling, and then Mac
is trying to track you down.
1648
01:29:27,100 --> 01:29:31,100
And what am I supposed to tell
the American girl, the... Miranda?
1649
01:29:31,200 --> 01:29:33,300
- What do I tell her?
- Miranda?
1650
01:29:33,400 --> 01:29:34,600
- Miranda?
- Yes!
1651
01:29:34,700 --> 01:29:37,900
- What?
- Her family flew home, but she didn't.
1652
01:29:38,100 --> 01:29:41,000
And she has been everywhere
searching for you.
1653
01:29:41,300 --> 01:29:42,500
She has?
1654
01:29:44,500 --> 01:29:46,600
Screw off! I'm joking, man!
1655
01:29:47,300 --> 01:29:49,700
That chick ran for the hills, huh?
1656
01:29:51,600 --> 01:29:54,700
You should've seen your face!
You were so happy!
1657
01:29:54,800 --> 01:29:57,000
For a moment, you were like...
1658
01:29:58,200 --> 01:30:00,600
I can't believe I got you again!
1659
01:30:04,100 --> 01:30:05,600
The funny man!
1660
01:30:07,200 --> 01:30:09,700
That's cool man, that's cool.
Don't worry about me.
1661
01:30:09,800 --> 01:30:12,100
Seriously, are you here for a reason?
1662
01:30:12,200 --> 01:30:13,300
Huh? What's the deal?
1663
01:30:13,400 --> 01:30:16,300
What, you want me to... You want
to tell me to, like, go back and get Lila?
1664
01:30:16,400 --> 01:30:18,900
Or go back to the States?
It's not gonna happen!
1665
01:30:19,000 --> 01:30:23,800
Look at you. Listen to you.
You are sounding loco!
1666
01:30:23,900 --> 01:30:25,500
- Oh, I'm loco?
- Yes.
1667
01:30:25,600 --> 01:30:26,800
No, you're loco!
1668
01:30:26,900 --> 01:30:30,500
Lila burned my wallet, she burned
my clothes, she burned my passport.
1669
01:30:30,600 --> 01:30:32,400
Okay? Even if I wanted
to go back, I couldn't!
1670
01:30:32,500 --> 01:30:35,900
I can't get papers
for like a month or something.
1671
01:30:36,900 --> 01:30:40,700
But you know what? I don't need papers
to hang with this guy,
1672
01:30:40,800 --> 01:30:42,300
'cause he doesn't want papers.
1673
01:30:42,400 --> 01:30:44,900
He just wants friendship, don't you?
1674
01:30:46,000 --> 01:30:47,300
And we're gonna stay here,
1675
01:30:47,400 --> 01:30:49,400
we're gonna keep talking it out
and talking it out,
1676
01:30:49,500 --> 01:30:51,900
until it feels right up in my head.
Right, Manny?
1677
01:30:52,000 --> 01:30:54,500
Even if it takes forever. Am I right?
1678
01:30:55,500 --> 01:30:57,800
Listen, you little gringo pussy,
1679
01:30:57,900 --> 01:31:03,500
you've been ear-fucking me for
two straight weeks about all this shit!
1680
01:31:03,600 --> 01:31:05,500
You wanna fix what you did?
1681
01:31:05,600 --> 01:31:07,700
Stop talking about it, just do it!
1682
01:31:07,800 --> 01:31:10,200
Get off your ass and do it!
1683
01:31:14,100 --> 01:31:16,100
Manuel is right, Señor Eddie.
1684
01:31:16,300 --> 01:31:20,200
You are going to have to go back and
fix this yourself, okay? Now, come on.
1685
01:31:20,400 --> 01:31:21,500
- Get up!
- Can't.
1686
01:31:21,600 --> 01:31:24,000
You can do it, come on! Listen.
1687
01:31:24,100 --> 01:31:28,800
I have connections. You know, people
that can sneak you back into California.
1688
01:31:30,200 --> 01:31:31,300
You're not joking?
1689
01:31:31,400 --> 01:31:33,700
No, I promise. I'm not kidding this time.
1690
01:31:33,800 --> 01:31:36,200
- Okay, good. Good, good.
- Yes!
1691
01:31:36,300 --> 01:31:39,900
But I don't wanna go to California.
I wanna go to Mississippi.
1692
01:31:49,800 --> 01:31:51,400
It's cool! It's cool, guys!
1693
01:31:51,600 --> 01:31:54,100
I'm an American. I just lost my passport.
1694
01:32:22,900 --> 01:32:24,100
America!
1695
01:32:37,900 --> 01:32:39,000
Stop right there!
1696
01:32:39,600 --> 01:32:40,600
I'm an American!
1697
01:33:23,700 --> 01:33:26,100
- Come on, grab his hand!
- You can do it!
1698
01:33:30,000 --> 01:33:31,900
Come on, buddy!
1699
01:33:33,800 --> 01:33:35,600
Come on! Grab it!
1700
01:34:01,400 --> 01:34:05,300
I'm going on the record here, Eddie.
I think this is a bad, bad idea.
1701
01:34:10,800 --> 01:34:14,400
Look, Pop, I appreciate your coming
down here and helping me out.
1702
01:34:14,500 --> 01:34:17,200
This is just something
that I have to do, okay?
1703
01:34:17,300 --> 01:34:19,500
I still don't understand
what happened with you and Lila.
1704
01:34:19,600 --> 01:34:21,500
She was such a sweet kid.
1705
01:34:22,400 --> 01:34:25,400
Dad, I love Miranda, okay?
1706
01:34:26,100 --> 01:34:28,000
I've never been more sure
of anything in my life.
1707
01:34:28,100 --> 01:34:30,400
All right, Eddie. Just be careful, okay?
1708
01:34:30,500 --> 01:34:34,100
Remember, this is the Bible Belt.
These people have guns.
1709
01:34:34,800 --> 01:34:37,200
This is it, right here! Stop! Stop!
1710
01:34:43,100 --> 01:34:46,100
Don't you think we should clean you up
or give you a shave or something?
1711
01:34:46,200 --> 01:34:48,000
No. Look. I've been working on
this speech for over a month.
1712
01:34:48,100 --> 01:34:49,900
I just want to go in and do it.
1713
01:34:50,000 --> 01:34:51,500
Knock 'em dead!
1714
01:35:07,000 --> 01:35:11,300
Seven pitches in a row over 90 miles
an hour? That boy hums that ball!
1715
01:35:12,700 --> 01:35:15,700
Byoo! Look what the cat dragged in!
1716
01:35:18,500 --> 01:35:21,500
I know, don't ask. Is Miranda around?
1717
01:35:22,200 --> 01:35:25,200
- You must be out of your mind.
- Well, no, I'm not.
1718
01:35:25,300 --> 01:35:29,300
Oh, my God! Why am I not surprised
that this moron's standing out here?
1719
01:35:29,400 --> 01:35:30,900
It's all right.
Look, I don't want any trouble, Martin.
1720
01:35:31,000 --> 01:35:33,300
Oh, you don't want any trouble?
You're about to get some trouble, boy!
1721
01:35:33,400 --> 01:35:35,400
You better get off my stoop!
You piece of shit!
1722
01:35:35,500 --> 01:35:37,700
That is a refreshingly honest response.
1723
01:35:37,800 --> 01:35:41,100
And let me just drop some of that
back on you,
1724
01:35:41,200 --> 01:35:45,100
and tell you I made
a huge mistake, okay? Guilty. Boom.
1725
01:35:45,200 --> 01:35:47,600
I stepped in it, big-time.
1726
01:35:47,700 --> 01:35:49,000
And I admit it, okay?
1727
01:35:49,100 --> 01:35:51,200
I jumped into a marriage
way too quickly.
1728
01:35:51,300 --> 01:35:53,300
I only knew my wife for a couple months
before we got married, okay?
1729
01:35:53,400 --> 01:35:55,800
So that's the back story.
1730
01:35:55,900 --> 01:36:00,100
And how long did you know Miranda
before you decided she was the one?
1731
01:36:01,600 --> 01:36:03,200
Two days, and I hear that.
1732
01:36:03,300 --> 01:36:05,000
Let me just say to you,
"That's my point."
1733
01:36:05,100 --> 01:36:07,300
I'm not gonna make
the same mistake again, okay?
1734
01:36:07,400 --> 01:36:10,000
You can rest assured,
I have got my act together.
1735
01:36:10,000 --> 01:36:11,700
And once my annulment is finalized,
1736
01:36:11,800 --> 01:36:14,100
I really believe that Miranda
and I should just go slow.
1737
01:36:14,200 --> 01:36:16,500
I mean, you know, date for a while.
1738
01:36:16,600 --> 01:36:19,000
Move in together for like a year, at least.
1739
01:36:19,100 --> 01:36:23,000
See what it feels like,
then go from there, okay? No promises.
1740
01:36:23,100 --> 01:36:25,400
- Really?
- I wanna do everything right this time.
1741
01:36:25,500 --> 01:36:29,200
There ain't gonna be a "this time,"
Eddie. The popcorn has popped.
1742
01:36:29,300 --> 01:36:32,300
Miranda and Cal got married
two weeks ago Saturday.
1743
01:36:32,400 --> 01:36:33,400
What?
1744
01:36:33,800 --> 01:36:36,200
What're you talking about?
1745
01:36:36,300 --> 01:36:38,800
She has finally come to her senses.
1746
01:36:39,200 --> 01:36:40,100
I don't believe you.
1747
01:36:40,200 --> 01:36:41,600
- Oh, you better believe it.
- Eddie...
1748
01:36:41,700 --> 01:36:43,900
- I don't believe you.
- Eddie...
1749
01:36:44,000 --> 01:36:45,300
It's true.
1750
01:36:47,000 --> 01:36:48,600
They got married?
1751
01:36:52,500 --> 01:36:55,100
Well, can I...
At least, can I talk to her in person...
1752
01:36:55,200 --> 01:36:57,000
- No, you cannot, all right?
- Martin! Martin! Calm down!
1753
01:36:57,100 --> 01:36:58,700
You will stay the hell away
from Miranda, okay?
1754
01:36:58,800 --> 01:37:00,300
I'm gonna put my fist through your face!
1755
01:37:00,400 --> 01:37:02,300
I'll put both of my fists
through your face!
1756
01:37:02,400 --> 01:37:05,300
I'm calm! I'm calm! I'm being calm.
You're holding me too tight!
1757
01:37:05,400 --> 01:37:07,200
Stop it. Eddie...
1758
01:37:07,300 --> 01:37:08,400
- Take it easy, boy.
- I'm fine.
1759
01:37:08,500 --> 01:37:12,700
Now, look, we ask you to respect
Miranda and Cal's privacy.
1760
01:37:13,700 --> 01:37:16,300
Give those kids a chance to be happy.
1761
01:37:17,000 --> 01:37:20,500
If you care about Miranda,
that's what you'll do.
1762
01:37:25,400 --> 01:37:26,800
Okay, Beryl.
1763
01:37:29,700 --> 01:37:30,900
I will.
1764
01:37:43,100 --> 01:37:44,700
Miranda!
1765
01:37:51,800 --> 01:37:54,100
It's okay!
1766
01:37:54,200 --> 01:37:56,200
It's me. It's just Eddie.
1767
01:37:57,200 --> 01:37:58,700
Are you crazy?
1768
01:37:59,800 --> 01:38:01,300
This is crazy!
1769
01:38:02,400 --> 01:38:03,300
Hi!
1770
01:38:03,500 --> 01:38:06,400
- What the hell are you doing here?
- It's okay, it's okay.
1771
01:38:06,500 --> 01:38:09,200
Beryl told me you got married.
I just wanted to talk to you.
1772
01:38:09,300 --> 01:38:11,700
This is my husband sleeping
right next to me. Do you see that?
1773
01:38:11,800 --> 01:38:12,700
Yes, I do.
1774
01:38:12,800 --> 01:38:14,700
This is not the time or the place
to do this!
1775
01:38:14,800 --> 01:38:17,900
Please, please. Look, I'll keep it quiet.
I'll be cool. Just hear me out.
1776
01:38:18,000 --> 01:38:21,000
No! I am not going to hear you out!
This is insane!
1777
01:38:21,100 --> 01:38:23,900
I'm begging you! You don't know
what I've been through to get here.
1778
01:38:24,000 --> 01:38:26,000
Please, just hear me out.
1779
01:38:27,900 --> 01:38:29,800
You got one minute. Go.
1780
01:38:30,100 --> 01:38:33,400
Okay, look. First of all, I'm so sorry
I didn't tell you I was married.
1781
01:38:33,500 --> 01:38:37,200
See, I tried to tell you a couple of times,
but we kept on getting interrupted.
1782
01:38:37,300 --> 01:38:39,800
And then there was this sort of
classic misunderstanding
1783
01:38:39,900 --> 01:38:41,900
about my wife being murdered.
1784
01:38:42,000 --> 01:38:43,100
Anyway, the point is...
1785
01:38:43,200 --> 01:38:45,800
No! The point is,
whether you tried to tell me or not,
1786
01:38:45,900 --> 01:38:48,500
you tried to pick me up
on your honeymoon!
1787
01:38:48,600 --> 01:38:49,800
Do you know how creepy that is?
1788
01:38:49,900 --> 01:38:53,600
Yes, I do. I do. It's repulsive,
and I owe you a massive apology.
1789
01:38:53,700 --> 01:38:56,600
But, on the other hand,
I'm glad it happened.
1790
01:39:10,600 --> 01:39:14,600
Look, it's not my fault the Lord works
in mysterious ways.
1791
01:39:14,700 --> 01:39:18,300
And so, yeah, I screwed up, okay?
I got married a week too early.
1792
01:39:18,400 --> 01:39:20,500
But you know what?
I wouldn't change any of it.
1793
01:39:20,600 --> 01:39:22,100
I don't regret marrying Lila
1794
01:39:22,200 --> 01:39:24,000
because if I hadn't,
then I wouldn't have gone to Cabo,
1795
01:39:24,100 --> 01:39:28,000
and I wouldn't have met you, and
I wouldn't have fallen in love with you,
1796
01:39:28,100 --> 01:39:30,600
and I will never apologize for that.
1797
01:39:31,500 --> 01:39:32,700
Not ever.
1798
01:39:34,900 --> 01:39:36,000
God damn it, Eddie.
1799
01:39:36,100 --> 01:39:37,300
I know.
1800
01:39:41,900 --> 01:39:43,200
Cal, it's fine.
1801
01:39:43,300 --> 01:39:45,700
Martin! Martin, put the bat down.
1802
01:39:45,800 --> 01:39:48,900
Just shush, all right?
This ain't about you, it's about him!
1803
01:39:49,000 --> 01:39:50,100
What?
1804
01:39:51,200 --> 01:39:52,500
Who the hell is that guy?
1805
01:39:52,600 --> 01:39:55,700
This the psychopath who's trying
to steal your woman, man!
1806
01:39:55,800 --> 01:39:58,400
I knew you wouldn't stay away from her,
you son of a bitch!
1807
01:39:58,500 --> 01:40:01,500
I can't help it.
The heart wants what it wants.
1808
01:40:01,900 --> 01:40:03,500
Eddie, you've gotta get out of here!
1809
01:40:03,600 --> 01:40:05,800
Not until you give me an answer.
1810
01:40:05,900 --> 01:40:07,800
No! There ain't gonna be no answer!
1811
01:40:07,900 --> 01:40:11,400
Damn you, Martin!
Damn, that hurts! Shit!
1812
01:40:11,500 --> 01:40:12,900
You... Martin, that hurts!
1813
01:40:13,000 --> 01:40:16,600
You wanna throw down, tough guy?
I will mess your shit up! Come on.
1814
01:40:16,700 --> 01:40:19,100
I don't want any trouble here.
Why don't you just back up, all right?
1815
01:40:19,200 --> 01:40:21,000
Well, trouble's found you, pussydick!
1816
01:40:21,100 --> 01:40:22,200
Dad! It's okay.
1817
01:40:22,300 --> 01:40:26,800
Look, Miranda, just tell me,
do you feel the same way, or not?
1818
01:40:29,200 --> 01:40:31,600
We can figure everything else out.
1819
01:40:35,900 --> 01:40:38,700
No, I don't, Eddie.
1820
01:40:40,000 --> 01:40:43,300
We had a connection in Mexico,
and that's all it was.
1821
01:40:45,500 --> 01:40:50,400
I love Cal, and everything that happened
in Cabo made me realize that.
1822
01:40:52,300 --> 01:40:53,600
I'm sorry.
1823
01:40:54,400 --> 01:40:56,000
That's the deal.
1824
01:40:57,100 --> 01:41:00,500
Come on, kid, let's get out of here.
Come on, come on.
1825
01:41:02,100 --> 01:41:04,800
Come on.
Bitches be crazy, you know that.
1826
01:41:06,700 --> 01:41:07,900
Come on.
1827
01:41:10,100 --> 01:41:12,000
Yeah, take care, Grandpa.
1828
01:41:12,400 --> 01:41:14,100
Come on, let's go.
1829
01:41:14,800 --> 01:41:15,900
Wow.
1830
01:41:20,800 --> 01:41:22,000
Hey, Dad?
1831
01:41:22,800 --> 01:41:24,200
Take a look.
1832
01:41:24,300 --> 01:41:27,400
If she's watching,
it means I still have a shot.
1833
01:41:30,200 --> 01:41:32,300
Your goose is cooked, Eddie.
1834
01:41:55,800 --> 01:41:58,700
Come on, man. You can't leave me now.
1835
01:41:58,900 --> 01:42:01,200
I finally straightened Tammy out.
1836
01:42:01,600 --> 01:42:03,000
What does that mean?
1837
01:42:03,100 --> 01:42:05,500
It means I stood up to her.
I told her that from now on,
1838
01:42:05,600 --> 01:42:08,100
Thursday through Sunday,
it's gonna be bros before hos.
1839
01:42:08,200 --> 01:42:10,400
I said, "I's needs my's alone time."
1840
01:42:10,500 --> 01:42:13,800
Really? You said that? Just like that?
Putting your hand up, like...
1841
01:42:13,900 --> 01:42:15,000
Like, half that, yeah.
1842
01:42:15,100 --> 01:42:16,900
And she bought that?
1843
01:42:21,100 --> 01:42:23,800
Honey, I'm conversing
with Edward right now.
1844
01:42:23,900 --> 01:42:25,600
I'll speak to you later.
1845
01:42:25,700 --> 01:42:26,900
Goodbye.
1846
01:42:28,100 --> 01:42:31,000
- Wow. Impressive.
- Yeah, see?
1847
01:42:31,100 --> 01:42:33,300
That's how it's gonna be from now on.
Please don't go.
1848
01:42:33,400 --> 01:42:34,600
Mac, we've been through this before.
1849
01:42:34,700 --> 01:42:36,600
There's no reason for me
to be here, okay?
1850
01:42:36,700 --> 01:42:40,900
Lila got the store in the divorce.
My dad's off in Vegas all the time.
1851
01:42:41,000 --> 01:42:43,500
I haven't really met anybody
in the last six months.
1852
01:42:43,600 --> 01:42:45,500
That's because you're still
hung up on that Miranda chick.
1853
01:42:45,600 --> 01:42:48,700
No, I'm not! I'm over her. I moved on.
1854
01:42:48,800 --> 01:42:50,600
In fact, I'm starting to think
there's a lot of good
1855
01:42:50,700 --> 01:42:51,800
that came out of that experience.
1856
01:42:51,900 --> 01:42:52,800
- Oh, really?
- Yeah!
1857
01:42:52,900 --> 01:42:56,100
Like, you got to sit around
for six months in your panties,
1858
01:42:56,200 --> 01:42:58,500
growing that funky beard.
That was awesome.
1859
01:42:58,700 --> 01:43:00,300
Yeah, which is why I need to change.
1860
01:43:00,500 --> 01:43:02,500
I can't just sit around
waiting for life to happen to me.
1861
01:43:02,600 --> 01:43:04,000
I need to follow my instincts,
1862
01:43:04,100 --> 01:43:07,300
and right now my instincts
are telling me that I...
1863
01:43:08,400 --> 01:43:11,400
Mac, get your ass
in the fucking car right now!
1864
01:43:11,500 --> 01:43:13,500
You got it, sweetie. Hi.
1865
01:43:13,600 --> 01:43:15,300
Eddie! Think about what I said.
1866
01:43:15,400 --> 01:43:17,000
Bros before hos!
1867
01:43:17,600 --> 01:43:19,800
How you doing, Eddie? You sad?
1868
01:43:20,800 --> 01:43:22,100
- No.
- Good.
1869
01:43:22,800 --> 01:43:24,100
Good. Okay.
1870
01:43:25,400 --> 01:43:27,100
Okay. Bye, Lester.
1871
01:43:40,700 --> 01:43:46,100
Now, for another $150,
I can give you the Uncle Tito special.
1872
01:43:46,200 --> 01:43:48,900
A guided tour to the island's best reef!
1873
01:43:49,000 --> 01:43:51,900
- $150?
- That's a little steep, isn't it?
1874
01:43:52,000 --> 01:43:54,300
Or you can find it yourself.
You guys are pretty big.
1875
01:43:54,400 --> 01:43:57,200
I don't think you're gonna have
a problem fending off the sharks.
1876
01:43:57,300 --> 01:44:00,500
Tito! Don't scare these people.
There's no sharks.
1877
01:44:00,600 --> 01:44:03,000
There's sand sharks,
but they don't have any teeth.
1878
01:44:03,100 --> 01:44:06,800
You see that attitude right there?
You have no business sense.
1879
01:44:07,000 --> 01:44:08,400
Hey, Manuelito! Do me a favor.
1880
01:44:08,500 --> 01:44:11,400
Help Tito give these folks
some snorkel gear, all right?
1881
01:44:11,500 --> 01:44:12,900
Throw in the fins for free.
1882
01:44:13,100 --> 01:44:15,900
- Oh, hey. Thanks, Eddie.
- Thanks again, Eddie.
1883
01:44:19,500 --> 01:44:21,400
How much for a skimboard?
1884
01:44:28,900 --> 01:44:30,800
Hey! Hi!
1885
01:44:31,600 --> 01:44:32,600
Hi.
1886
01:44:34,100 --> 01:44:36,000
What are you doing here?
1887
01:44:37,300 --> 01:44:40,600
Down here with the family.
It's that time of year again.
1888
01:44:40,700 --> 01:44:44,800
Beryl and Boo are renewing their vows
on the beach this afternoon, so...
1889
01:44:44,900 --> 01:44:45,900
Wow!
1890
01:44:46,200 --> 01:44:48,500
And, to be honest,
I had heard a rumor that
1891
01:44:48,600 --> 01:44:50,700
you'd opened a business down here.
1892
01:44:50,800 --> 01:44:53,000
Oh, yeah? How'd you hear that?
1893
01:44:54,000 --> 01:44:56,700
I got the e-vite for your grand opening.
1894
01:44:57,200 --> 01:45:02,200
Oh, right.
Yeah, I had a group e-mail list that I...
1895
01:45:03,900 --> 01:45:05,900
I can't believe you really moved here.
1896
01:45:06,000 --> 01:45:07,200
Yeah, I did it.
1897
01:45:07,300 --> 01:45:11,000
I became one of those
perma-vacationers,
1898
01:45:11,200 --> 01:45:12,500
like we talked about.
1899
01:45:12,600 --> 01:45:14,500
- Yeah, I remember.
- Yeah.
1900
01:45:14,700 --> 01:45:16,000
Suits you.
1901
01:45:18,400 --> 01:45:20,100
You look beautiful.
1902
01:45:21,500 --> 01:45:22,700
Thanks.
1903
01:45:23,800 --> 01:45:26,700
So, you down here with Cal
and the crew and...
1904
01:45:29,200 --> 01:45:30,900
Cal and I split up.
1905
01:45:32,300 --> 01:45:33,500
Split up.
1906
01:45:34,800 --> 01:45:39,200
He's a great guy, but we probably
should've never gotten married.
1907
01:45:41,000 --> 01:45:42,300
I'm sorry.
1908
01:45:44,200 --> 01:45:47,800
I guess now I know what you
went through on your honeymoon.
1909
01:45:48,900 --> 01:45:51,200
It's not easy being married when
1910
01:45:52,700 --> 01:45:55,100
you're in love with someone else.
1911
01:45:58,000 --> 01:46:01,300
He's in the car,
and I am dying for you to meet him!
1912
01:46:02,700 --> 01:46:03,800
He's...
1913
01:46:04,600 --> 01:46:06,500
Really? He's in the car?
1914
01:46:07,100 --> 01:46:09,600
No! No.
1915
01:46:14,200 --> 01:46:15,400
Funny.
1916
01:46:16,000 --> 01:46:17,900
Got me. That was... That's good.
1917
01:46:18,000 --> 01:46:19,000
- Very funny.
- Thank you.
1918
01:46:19,100 --> 01:46:21,900
- So, you are single. You're single?
- I am.
1919
01:46:24,100 --> 01:46:27,500
I'm actually staying at the hotel, if you
1920
01:46:28,500 --> 01:46:30,800
wanna grab a drink or something.
1921
01:46:32,900 --> 01:46:34,500
I would love that.
1922
01:46:35,600 --> 01:46:38,300
How about tonight, 7:00?
1923
01:46:39,100 --> 01:46:41,900
7:00, I could do that. Yeah.
I could do that.
1924
01:46:42,000 --> 01:46:43,100
- Cool.
- Great.
1925
01:46:43,200 --> 01:46:44,400
Miranda!
1926
01:46:45,200 --> 01:46:47,600
Come on, we're gonna miss
the ceremony!
1927
01:46:47,700 --> 01:46:50,000
- I'm coming!
- Hey, Martin!
1928
01:46:50,100 --> 01:46:51,600
Hello, asshole!
1929
01:46:52,300 --> 01:46:54,100
Great to see you, too!
1930
01:46:57,300 --> 01:46:58,600
So, I'll see you tonight.
1931
01:46:58,700 --> 01:47:00,800
Yeah, I'll see you tonight.
1932
01:47:06,300 --> 01:47:07,400
Eddie?
1933
01:47:08,700 --> 01:47:09,900
Who was that?
1934
01:47:10,000 --> 01:47:14,800
Oh, hey! Yeah, it's unbelievable.
That was Gretchen Construbias.
1935
01:47:14,900 --> 01:47:15,900
Who?
1936
01:47:16,000 --> 01:47:18,400
Gretchen Construbias,
the CEO of Da Huey?
1937
01:47:18,500 --> 01:47:22,200
Da Huey Water Wear Sports.
They're, like, my biggest supplier. Yeah.
1938
01:47:22,300 --> 01:47:23,800
Yeah, anyway, she's in town
for one night.
1939
01:47:23,900 --> 01:47:27,200
She wants to get together and have
drinks at 7:00 to discuss credit terms.
1940
01:47:27,300 --> 01:47:28,800
- Tonight?
- Yeah.
1941
01:47:28,900 --> 01:47:31,200
Oh, but, honey, it's our first anniversary.
1942
01:47:31,300 --> 01:47:34,700
I know, I know.
But, Consuela, I'll be back by 9:00, so...
1943
01:47:34,800 --> 01:47:37,400
- Oh, okay. So we have a late dinner?
- Okay.
1944
01:47:37,500 --> 01:47:39,400
Yes, perfect.
Late dinner, and that'll be good,
1945
01:47:39,500 --> 01:47:42,200
because there's some stuff
that I think we should discuss.
1946
01:47:42,300 --> 01:47:44,400
Oh. Good stuff or bad stuff?
1947
01:47:44,900 --> 01:47:48,400
Well, I think at first you might flinch,
1948
01:47:48,500 --> 01:47:50,800
but in the long run, great stuff.
1949
01:47:54,200 --> 01:47:55,900
I love you, Eddie.
1950
01:47:56,800 --> 01:47:58,900
Love, love, love, love, love.
1951
01:48:03,000 --> 01:48:04,000
Fuck me.
1952
01:50:56,100 --> 01:50:58,600
Cock me! Cock me!
1953
01:51:01,500 --> 01:51:03,500
Yes, yes!
1954
01:51:03,600 --> 01:51:05,300
Finally!
1955
01:51:05,400 --> 01:51:07,000
Yes, you're doing it!