1
00:00:56,011 --> 00:00:57,706
Onward, Chauncey!

2
00:00:57,846 --> 00:01:00,440
To the highest room
of the tallest tower ...

3
00:01:00,582 --> 00:01:05,679
where my princess awaits rescue
from her handsome Prince Charming!

4
00:01:17,032 --> 00:01:20,798
This is worse than "Love Letters".
I hate dinner theater!

5
00:01:20,936 --> 00:01:22,699
Me, too.

6
00:01:24,039 --> 00:01:26,030
Whoa there, Chauncey!

7
00:01:27,442 --> 00:01:30,900
Hark! The brave Prince Charming
approacheth.

8
00:01:31,046 --> 00:01:35,415
Fear not, fair maiden. I shall slay
the monster that guards you ...

9
00:01:35,551 --> 00:01:38,486
then take my place as rightful king.

10
00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:40,212
What did she say?

11
00:01:43,992 --> 00:01:45,391
It's Shrek!

12
00:01:45,661 --> 00:01:47,322
Whoo, Shrek, yeah!

13
00:01:49,565 --> 00:01:51,658
Prepare, foul beast ...

14
00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:56,464
to enter into a world of pain
with which you are not familiar!

15
00:01:56,605 --> 00:01:59,165
Happy birthday to thee.
Happy birthday to thee.

16
00:01:59,308 --> 00:02:00,570
Do you mind?

17
00:02:00,909 --> 00:02:04,072
Do you mind? Boring!

18
00:02:08,584 --> 00:02:10,916
Prepare, foul beast ...

19
00:02:19,928 --> 00:02:22,624
Someday you'll be sorry.

20
00:02:22,764 --> 00:02:24,925
We already are!

21
00:02:50,058 --> 00:02:51,355
Mommy ...

22
00:02:55,297 --> 00:02:58,789
You're right. 
I can't let this happen.

23
00:02:59,635 --> 00:03:00,966
I can't!

24
00:03:02,137 --> 00:03:05,903
I am the rightful 
King of "Far Far Away".

25
00:03:06,041 --> 00:03:08,134
And I promise you this, Mother ...

26
00:03:08,477 --> 00:03:11,207
I will restore dignity to my throne.

27
00:03:15,817 --> 00:03:16,909
And this time,

28
00:03:17,052 --> 00:03:21,216
no one will stand in my way.

29
00:03:38,173 --> 00:03:39,834
Good morning.

30
00:03:40,842 --> 00:03:42,503
Good morning.

31
00:03:44,179 --> 00:03:45,203
Morning breath.

32
00:03:45,347 --> 00:03:48,510
I know. Isn't it wonderful?

33
00:03:49,184 --> 00:03:51,015
Good morning, good morning.

34
00:03:51,687 --> 00:03:54,087
The sun is shining through.

35
00:03:54,222 --> 00:03:56,417
Good morning, good morning.
To you.

36
00:03:56,558 --> 00:03:58,685
And you!
And you!

37
00:04:02,597 --> 00:04:04,292
They grow up so fast.

38
00:04:04,433 --> 00:04:06,526
Not fast enough.

39
00:04:08,603 --> 00:04:11,299
You'll be filling in
for the King and Queen.

40
00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:14,637
Several functions
require your attendance, sir.

41
00:04:14,776 --> 00:04:18,075
Great! Let's get started.

42
00:04:18,213 --> 00:04:21,046
Come on, lazybones. 
Time to get moving!

43
00:04:21,883 --> 00:04:24,147
You need to get a pair of jammies.

44
00:04:31,593 --> 00:04:34,824
♪ I got some sleep and I needed it. ♪

45
00:04:34,963 --> 00:04:37,693
♪ Not a lot, just a little bit. ♪

46
00:04:37,833 --> 00:04:40,927
♪ Someone's always
trying to keep me from it. ♪

47
00:04:41,069 --> 00:04:43,902
♪ It's a crying shame. ♪

48
00:04:44,573 --> 00:04:46,939
♪ It's a royal pain in the neck. ♪

49
00:04:47,075 --> 00:04:48,736
I knight thee.

50
00:05:10,599 --> 00:05:13,727
If you're filling in for a king,
you should look like one.

51
00:05:13,869 --> 00:05:16,929
Can somebody come in
and work on Shrek?

52
00:05:18,774 --> 00:05:20,264
I will see what I can do.

53
00:05:41,463 --> 00:05:43,124
Yeah, wow.

54
00:05:43,965 --> 00:05:46,456
Is this really necessary?

55
00:05:47,235 --> 00:05:48,896
Quite necessary, Fiona.

56
00:05:49,037 --> 00:05:51,835
- I'm Shrek, you twit.
- Whatever.

57
00:05:51,973 --> 00:05:55,670
This isn't a rehearsal, peoples.
Let's see some hustle!

58
00:05:55,811 --> 00:05:57,745
Smiles, everyone! Smiles!

59
00:05:57,879 --> 00:06:01,337
I don't know how much longer
I can keep this up.

60
00:06:01,483 --> 00:06:04,418
I'm sorry, but can you
just try to grin and bear it?

61
00:06:04,553 --> 00:06:06,578
It's just until Dad gets better.

62
00:06:08,657 --> 00:06:09,988
Shrek?

63
00:06:11,326 --> 00:06:12,918
You look handsome.

64
00:06:13,061 --> 00:06:14,995
Come here, you.

65
00:06:29,344 --> 00:06:34,008
My but is itching up a storm and
I can't reach it in this monkey suit.

66
00:06:34,850 --> 00:06:37,785
Hey, you! Come here. 
What's your name?

67
00:06:37,919 --> 00:06:40,285
Fiddlesworth, sir.

68
00:06:40,422 --> 00:06:41,514
Perfect.

69
00:06:44,192 --> 00:06:46,558
Ladies and gentlemen ...

70
00:06:46,695 --> 00:06:49,858
Princess Fiona and Sir Shrek!

71
00:06:54,202 --> 00:06:55,965
Ahh! You've got it.

72
00:06:56,104 --> 00:06:57,628
A little to the left.

73
00:06:58,874 --> 00:07:01,069
That's it! That's good.

74
00:07:01,209 --> 00:07:04,303
Oh, yeah! Scratch
that thing! You're on it.

75
00:07:04,446 --> 00:07:05,879
Shrek!

76
00:07:10,785 --> 00:07:11,911
My eye!

77
00:07:12,053 --> 00:07:13,213
What are you doing?

78
00:07:19,794 --> 00:07:20,783
Fiona!

79
00:07:23,899 --> 00:07:27,130
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. I'm fine.

80
00:07:30,739 --> 00:07:33,071
Shrimp! My favorite!

81
00:07:43,585 --> 00:07:46,281
- That's it! We're leaving!
- Calm down.

82
00:07:46,421 --> 00:07:51,358
Calm down? Who do you think
we're kidding? I am an ogre.

83
00:07:51,493 --> 00:07:55,088
I'm not cut out for this, Fiona,
and I never will be.

84
00:07:59,167 --> 00:08:00,532
I think that went well.

85
00:08:00,669 --> 00:08:01,897
Donkey!

86
00:08:02,037 --> 00:08:03,766
Come on, Shrek!

87
00:08:04,272 --> 00:08:07,503
Some people just don't
understand boundaries.

88
00:08:16,785 --> 00:08:21,381
Just think. A couple more days
and we'll be back home ...

89
00:08:21,523 --> 00:08:24,822
in our vermin-filled shack
strewn with fungus ...

90
00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:27,861
and filled with the stench
of mud and neglect.

91
00:08:27,996 --> 00:08:30,624
You had me at "vermin-filled".

92
00:08:31,466 --> 00:08:36,301
And, um ... maybe even the pitter-patter
of little feet on the floor.

93
00:08:36,805 --> 00:08:39,501
That's right, the swamp rats
will be spawning.

94
00:08:39,641 --> 00:08:41,006
Uh, no.

95
00:08:41,142 --> 00:08:44,839
What I'm thinking of is a 
little bigger than a swamp rat.

96
00:08:44,980 --> 00:08:46,004
Donkey?

97
00:08:46,147 --> 00:08:49,810
No, Shrek. 
What if, theoretically ...

98
00:08:51,086 --> 00:08:53,213
they were little ogre feet?

99
00:08:59,661 --> 00:09:03,028
Honey, let's be rational about this.

100
00:09:03,164 --> 00:09:05,530
Have you seen a baby lately?

101
00:09:05,667 --> 00:09:08,864
They just eat and poop, 
and they cry ...

102
00:09:09,004 --> 00:09:12,371
then they cry when they poop
and poop when they cry.

103
00:09:12,507 --> 00:09:15,305
Now, imagine an ogre baby.

104
00:09:15,443 --> 00:09:19,243
They extra-cry and they extra-poop.

105
00:09:19,381 --> 00:09:22,976
Shrek, don't you ever think
about having a family?

106
00:09:23,118 --> 00:09:26,679
Right now, you're my family.

107
00:09:30,692 --> 00:09:32,853
Somebody better be dying.

108
00:09:34,796 --> 00:09:37,026
I'm dying.

109
00:09:39,367 --> 00:09:40,527
Harold?

110
00:09:42,704 --> 00:09:45,798
Don't forget
to pay the gardener, Lillian.

111
00:09:45,940 --> 00:09:47,874
Of course, darling.

112
00:09:49,611 --> 00:09:50,669
Fiona.

113
00:09:50,812 --> 00:09:52,336
Yes, Daddy?

114
00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:55,210
I know I made 
many mistakes with you.

115
00:09:56,217 --> 00:09:57,684
It's okay.

116
00:09:57,819 --> 00:09:59,946
But your love for Shrek has ...

117
00:10:00,889 --> 00:10:02,288
taught me much.

118
00:10:04,426 --> 00:10:06,417
My dear boy ...

119
00:10:06,561 --> 00:10:09,826
I am proud to call you my son.

120
00:10:09,964 --> 00:10:13,092
And I'm proud to call you my frog ...

121
00:10:13,234 --> 00:10:15,668
King dad-in-law.

122
00:10:15,804 --> 00:10:21,401
Now there is a matter
of business to attend to.

123
00:10:31,753 --> 00:10:34,745
The Frog King ... is dead.

124
00:10:42,931 --> 00:10:44,899
Put your hat back on, fool.

125
00:10:45,033 --> 00:10:46,625
Shrek ...

126
00:10:46,768 --> 00:10:48,429
please come hither.

127
00:10:52,273 --> 00:10:53,638
Yeah, Dad?

128
00:10:53,775 --> 00:10:56,938
This kingdom needs a new king.

129
00:10:58,279 --> 00:11:02,943
You and Fiona
are next in line for the throne.

130
00:11:04,619 --> 00:11:08,817
Next in line. You see, Dad,
that's why people love you.

131
00:11:08,957 --> 00:11:12,290
Even on your deathbed,
you're still making jokes.

132
00:11:15,964 --> 00:11:19,661
Come on, Dad. An ogre as king?

133
00:11:19,801 --> 00:11:22,326
That's not such a good idea.

134
00:11:22,470 --> 00:11:25,769
There must be somebody else. 
Anybody!

135
00:11:25,907 --> 00:11:31,106
Aside from you, there is
only one remaining heir.

136
00:11:31,246 --> 00:11:34,443
Really? Who is he, Dad?

137
00:11:34,582 --> 00:11:36,641
His name is ...

138
00:11:38,019 --> 00:11:39,077
is ...

139
00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:40,847
What's his name?

140
00:11:40,989 --> 00:11:42,581
is ...

141
00:11:44,492 --> 00:11:45,584
Daddy!

142
00:12:02,844 --> 00:12:04,812
His name is Arthur.

143
00:12:04,946 --> 00:12:06,345
Arthur?

144
00:12:10,685 --> 00:12:13,882
I know you'll do ...

145
00:12:14,022 --> 00:12:16,684
what's right.

146
00:12:19,727 --> 00:12:21,058
Harold?

147
00:12:21,196 --> 00:12:22,754
Dad? Dad!

148
00:12:24,199 --> 00:12:25,427
Dad?

149
00:12:26,034 --> 00:12:27,626
Do your thing, man.

150
00:12:57,565 --> 00:13:01,433
♪ When you were young and your heart ♪

151
00:13:01,569 --> 00:13:03,730
♪ was an open book ♪

152
00:13:05,740 --> 00:13:09,870
♪ You used to say live and let live ♪

153
00:13:10,011 --> 00:13:13,344
♪ You know you did, you know you did.
You know you did. ♪

154
00:13:14,148 --> 00:13:19,211
♪ But if this ever changing world
In which we live in ♪

155
00:13:20,088 --> 00:13:24,252
♪ Makes you give in and cry ♪

156
00:13:26,761 --> 00:13:28,922
♪ Say live and let die ♪

157
00:13:32,367 --> 00:13:34,028
♪ Live and let die ♪

158
00:14:10,538 --> 00:14:14,304
♪ Hey, lady. You, lady ♪

159
00:14:15,310 --> 00:14:17,471
♪ Cursing at your life ♪

160
00:14:18,146 --> 00:14:20,808
♪ You're a discontented mother ♪

161
00:14:22,483 --> 00:14:25,145
♪ And a regimented wife ♪

162
00:14:50,845 --> 00:14:54,008
What does a prince
have to do to get a drink here?

163
00:14:55,350 --> 00:14:57,045
Ah, Mabel!

164
00:14:57,185 --> 00:15:01,588
Why they call you an ugly 
stepsister, I'll never know.

165
00:15:02,690 --> 00:15:05,784
Where's Doris? 
Taking the night off?

166
00:15:05,927 --> 00:15:09,693
She's not welcome here,
and neither are you.

167
00:15:11,366 --> 00:15:13,391
What do you want, Charming?

168
00:15:13,534 --> 00:15:17,595
Not much. 
Just a chance at redemption.

169
00:15:19,207 --> 00:15:20,674
And a Fuzzy Navel.

170
00:15:20,808 --> 00:15:23,868
And Fuzzy Navels 
for all my friends!

171
00:15:28,316 --> 00:15:29,943
We're not your friends.

172
00:15:32,153 --> 00:15:34,280
You don't belong here.

173
00:15:34,422 --> 00:15:38,586
You're absolutely right,
but, I mean, do any of us?

174
00:15:38,726 --> 00:15:40,353
Do a number on his face.

175
00:15:40,495 --> 00:15:45,091
Wait, wait, wait!
We are more alike than you think.

176
00:15:45,233 --> 00:15:49,135
Wicked Witch! The Seven Dwarfs
saved Snow White, and what happened?

177
00:15:49,270 --> 00:15:50,362
Oh, what's it to you?

178
00:15:50,505 --> 00:15:52,769
They left you the unfairest 
of them all.

179
00:15:52,907 --> 00:15:57,435
Now here you are,
hustling pool to get your next meal.

180
00:15:57,578 --> 00:15:59,409
How does that feel?

181
00:16:04,886 --> 00:16:06,478
Pretty unfair.

182
00:16:06,621 --> 00:16:08,020
And you!

183
00:16:08,156 --> 00:16:12,786
Your star puppet abandons the show
to go and find his father.

184
00:16:14,295 --> 00:16:16,388
I hate that little wooden puppet.

185
00:16:16,531 --> 00:16:18,499
And Hook.

186
00:16:18,633 --> 00:16:20,225
Need I say more?

187
00:16:23,938 --> 00:16:26,702
- And you, Frumpypigskin!
- Rumpelstiltskin.

188
00:16:26,841 --> 00:16:29,469
Where's that firstborn
you were promised?

189
00:16:31,879 --> 00:16:35,781
Mabel. Remember how you couldn't 
get your little fat foot ...

190
00:16:35,917 --> 00:16:37,817
into that tiny glass slipper?

191
00:16:40,488 --> 00:16:44,015
Cinderella is
in "Far Far Away" right now ...

192
00:16:44,158 --> 00:16:49,186
eating bonbons, cavorting with
every last fairy tale creature ...

193
00:16:49,330 --> 00:16:51,798
that has ever done you wrong!

194
00:16:51,933 --> 00:16:56,870
Once upon a time, someone decided
that we were the losers.

195
00:16:57,004 --> 00:16:59,871
But there are
two sides to every story ...

196
00:17:00,041 --> 00:17:02,566
and our side has not been told!

197
00:17:02,710 --> 00:17:07,579
So who will join me? Who wants
to come out on top for once?

198
00:17:07,715 --> 00:17:09,376
Who wants their ...

199
00:17:09,517 --> 00:17:12,680
"happily ever after"?

200
00:17:29,871 --> 00:17:31,532
This way, gents.

201
00:17:42,884 --> 00:17:47,912
It's out of my hands, senorita. The
winds of fate have blown on my destiny.

202
00:17:48,055 --> 00:17:51,855
But I will never forget you.
You are the love of my life.

203
00:17:51,993 --> 00:17:54,427
As are you.

204
00:17:54,562 --> 00:17:56,928
And, uh, you.

205
00:17:57,064 --> 00:18:00,227
I don't know you, but I'd like to.

206
00:18:01,402 --> 00:18:02,733
I got to go!

207
00:18:04,138 --> 00:18:05,833
I don't wanna leave you either.

208
00:18:05,973 --> 00:18:08,806
But you know how Shrek is.
The dude's lost without me.

209
00:18:09,744 --> 00:18:13,077
But don't worry. I'll send you
airmail kisses every day!

210
00:18:14,415 --> 00:18:15,780
Be strong, babies.

211
00:18:15,917 --> 00:18:18,351
Coco, Peanut, listen to your mama.

212
00:18:18,486 --> 00:18:22,479
Bananas, no roasting marshmallows
on your sister's head.

213
00:18:24,492 --> 00:18:26,119
That's my special boy!

214
00:18:26,260 --> 00:18:29,354
Come here, all of you!
Give your daddy a big hug!

215
00:18:35,937 --> 00:18:37,268
Shrek?

216
00:18:38,272 --> 00:18:42,572
Maybe you should just stay and be King.

217
00:18:42,710 --> 00:18:46,237
Come on. There's no way
I could run a kingdom.

218
00:18:46,380 --> 00:18:49,372
That's why your cousin Arthur
is a perfect choice.

219
00:18:49,517 --> 00:18:52,042
It's not that. You see ...

220
00:18:52,186 --> 00:18:56,646
And if he gives me trouble,
I always have persuasion and reason.

221
00:18:56,791 --> 00:19:00,124
Here's persuasion ... 
and here's reason.

222
00:19:02,530 --> 00:19:03,929
Fiona ...

223
00:19:04,065 --> 00:19:07,330
soon it's just going to be you, me ...

224
00:19:07,468 --> 00:19:09,129
and our swamp.

225
00:19:10,972 --> 00:19:13,463
It's not going to be 
just you and me.

226
00:19:14,742 --> 00:19:16,642
All aboard!

227
00:19:17,812 --> 00:19:20,645
It will be. I promise.

228
00:19:21,816 --> 00:19:23,306
I love you.

229
00:19:29,924 --> 00:19:31,585
That's lovely.

230
00:19:31,726 --> 00:19:33,318
Bye-bye, babies!

231
00:19:40,901 --> 00:19:42,095
Shrek!

232
00:19:43,337 --> 00:19:45,532
- Wait!
- What is it?

233
00:19:45,673 --> 00:19:47,163
I'm ... I'm ...

234
00:19:51,178 --> 00:19:53,043
I love you, too, honey!

235
00:19:53,180 --> 00:19:56,013
No! I said I'm ...

236
00:19:59,020 --> 00:20:00,453
You're what?

237
00:20:00,588 --> 00:20:03,022
I said I'm pregnant!

238
00:20:07,194 --> 00:20:08,661
What was that?

239
00:20:08,796 --> 00:20:11,856
You're going to be a father!

240
00:20:13,701 --> 00:20:15,498
That's great!

241
00:20:15,636 --> 00:20:18,901
Really? I'm glad you think so!

242
00:20:19,040 --> 00:20:20,439
I love you!

243
00:20:20,574 --> 00:20:22,565
Yeah!

244
00:20:22,710 --> 00:20:25,042
Me, too! You!

245
00:20:28,916 --> 00:20:32,408
I'm going to be an uncle!
I'm going to be an uncle!

246
00:20:32,553 --> 00:20:35,613
And you, my friend, are royally ...

247
00:21:14,328 --> 00:21:15,317
Home.

248
00:21:27,608 --> 00:21:28,939
Shrek!

249
00:21:31,278 --> 00:21:32,609
Fiona!

250
00:21:36,617 --> 00:21:37,948
Fiona?

251
00:21:57,171 --> 00:21:58,570
Oh, no.

252
00:22:01,742 --> 00:22:04,643
Better out than in, I always say.

253
00:22:14,321 --> 00:22:15,652
No, no, no!

254
00:22:17,825 --> 00:22:20,385
It's okay. 
It's gonna be all right.

255
00:22:25,666 --> 00:22:27,827
Stop! Hey, wait!

256
00:23:17,218 --> 00:23:18,742
Donkey. Donkey!

257
00:23:18,886 --> 00:23:20,114
Wake up!

258
00:23:22,556 --> 00:23:23,887
Dada!

259
00:23:26,327 --> 00:23:28,318
Shrek! Are you okay?

260
00:23:30,064 --> 00:23:35,593
I can't believe I'm going to be
a father. How did this happen?

261
00:23:35,736 --> 00:23:39,934
Allow me to explain. When a man
has feelings for a woman ...

262
00:23:40,074 --> 00:23:42,599
a powerful urge sweeps over him.

263
00:23:42,743 --> 00:23:45,234
I know how it happened.

264
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:48,139
I just can't believe it.

265
00:23:50,918 --> 00:23:52,749
How does it happen?

266
00:23:59,760 --> 00:24:05,027
♪ And the cat's in the cradle
and the silver spoon ♪

267
00:24:05,165 --> 00:24:07,793
♪ Little Boy Blue 
and the Man in the Moon ♪

268
00:24:07,935 --> 00:24:10,529
♪ When you coming home, son?
I don't know when ♪

269
00:24:10,671 --> 00:24:12,969
♪ But we'll get together then, Dad. ♪

270
00:24:13,107 --> 00:24:15,098
Donkey! Can you just cut to the part

271
00:24:15,242 --> 00:24:17,767
where you're supposed
to make me feel better?

272
00:24:18,512 --> 00:24:21,037
You know I love Fiona, boss. Right?

273
00:24:21,181 --> 00:24:25,242
What I am talking about
is you, me, my cousin's boat ...

274
00:24:25,386 --> 00:24:30,983
an ice cold pitcher of mojitos
and two weeks of nothing but fishing.

275
00:24:31,125 --> 00:24:32,990
Don't listen to him!

276
00:24:33,127 --> 00:24:35,823
Having a baby
isn't going to ruin your life.

277
00:24:35,963 --> 00:24:40,491
It's not my life I'm worried
about ruining, it's the kid's.

278
00:24:40,634 --> 00:24:44,934
When have you ever heard the phrase
"as sweet as an ogre" ...

279
00:24:45,072 --> 00:24:47,506
or "as nurturing as an ogre" ...

280
00:24:47,641 --> 00:24:52,010
or "You'll love
my dad. He's a real ogre."

281
00:24:52,146 --> 00:24:53,909
Okay. I get it.

282
00:24:54,048 --> 00:24:57,506
It's not going to be easy.
But you got us to help you.

283
00:24:57,651 --> 00:24:59,346
That's true.

284
00:24:59,486 --> 00:25:00,953
I'm doomed.

285
00:25:01,088 --> 00:25:02,749
You'll be fine.

286
00:25:03,657 --> 00:25:05,557
You're finished.

287
00:25:07,828 --> 00:25:10,490
Uh, with your journey.

288
00:25:18,672 --> 00:25:23,109
"Wor-ces-ters-shiree"?
Now that sounds fancy!

289
00:25:23,243 --> 00:25:24,574
It's Worcestershire.

290
00:25:24,712 --> 00:25:26,543
Like the sauce?

291
00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:28,011
It's spicy!

292
00:25:31,852 --> 00:25:33,683
They must be expecting us.

293
00:25:39,593 --> 00:25:42,391
What in the shista-shire
kind of place is this?

294
00:25:42,529 --> 00:25:47,728
Well, my stomach aches and my palms
just got sweaty. Must be a high school.

295
00:25:47,868 --> 00:25:49,028
High school?

296
00:25:49,169 --> 00:25:50,727
Ready? Okay!

297
00:25:50,871 --> 00:25:53,305
Wherefore art thou headed, to the top?

298
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:57,399
Yeah, we think so, we think so! And
dost thou thinkest thine can be stopped?

299
00:25:57,544 --> 00:26:00,012
Nay, we thinkst not, we thinkst not!

300
00:26:05,285 --> 00:26:09,278
All right, Mr. Percival,
ease up on the reins.

301
00:26:12,626 --> 00:26:16,323
For lo, bro, don't burn
all my frankincense and myrrh.

302
00:26:16,463 --> 00:26:19,955
I'm feeling nauseous from memories
of wedgies and swirlies!

303
00:26:20,100 --> 00:26:24,764
How did you receive wedgies when you are
clearly not the wearer of underpants?

304
00:26:24,905 --> 00:26:27,806
Let's just say some things
are better left unsaid.

305
00:26:27,941 --> 00:26:32,002
So I was all like, "I'd rather get
the black plague than go out with you."

306
00:26:32,146 --> 00:26:34,478
- Oh, totally.
- Pardon me.

307
00:26:34,615 --> 00:26:37,413
- Totally ew-eth.
- Yeah, totally.

308
00:26:39,019 --> 00:26:41,613
I just altered my character level
to +3 superb-ability.

309
00:26:41,755 --> 00:26:44,315
Hi. We're looking for someone named ...

310
00:26:44,458 --> 00:26:48,986
Who rolled a +9 dork spell and
summoned the beast and his quadruped?

311
00:26:50,831 --> 00:26:55,325
I know you're busy not fitting in, but
can you tell me where I can find Arthur?

312
00:26:55,469 --> 00:26:56,766
He's over there.

313
00:27:16,957 --> 00:27:21,360
There is no sweeter taste
on thy tongue than victory!

314
00:27:23,797 --> 00:27:26,664
Strong, handsome, face of a leader.

315
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:30,133
Does Arthur look like a king or what?

316
00:27:31,305 --> 00:27:32,636
Sorry.

317
00:27:33,373 --> 00:27:36,001
Did you say 
you were looking for Arthur?

318
00:27:36,143 --> 00:27:38,577
That information is
on a need-to-know basis.

319
00:27:38,712 --> 00:27:40,407
It's top secret!

320
00:27:40,547 --> 00:27:44,142
Now, gentlemen, let's away.
To the showers!

321
00:27:46,653 --> 00:27:48,280
Greetings, Your Majesty.

322
00:27:48,422 --> 00:27:49,980
This is your lucky day.

323
00:27:50,824 --> 00:27:52,917
What are you supposed to be?

324
00:27:53,060 --> 00:27:56,325
Some kind of giant mutant 
leprechaun or something?

325
00:27:57,331 --> 00:28:00,823
Giant mutant ... 
You made a funny.

326
00:28:01,335 --> 00:28:03,269
Unhand me, monster!

327
00:28:03,403 --> 00:28:05,371
Stop squirming, Arthur.

328
00:28:05,506 --> 00:28:07,838
I'm not Arthur.

329
00:28:09,843 --> 00:28:12,368
I am Lancelot.

330
00:28:12,513 --> 00:28:15,175
That dork over there is Arthur.

331
00:28:21,255 --> 00:28:23,450
This is, like, totally embarrassing ...

332
00:28:23,590 --> 00:28:26,184
but Tiffany thinkest
thou vex her so soothly.

333
00:28:26,326 --> 00:28:29,727
She thought perchance thou would
ask her to the Homecoming Dance.

334
00:28:29,863 --> 00:28:30,955
Excuse me?

335
00:28:31,098 --> 00:28:35,034
Like, whatever. She's into college 
guys and mythical creatures.

336
00:28:38,472 --> 00:28:40,565
Oh, Arthur ...

337
00:28:40,707 --> 00:28:44,404
come out, come out, 
wherever you are!

338
00:28:46,446 --> 00:28:49,074
You better run,
you little punk no-goodniks!

339
00:28:49,216 --> 00:28:52,617
The days of Donkey Dumpy Drawers
are over!

340
00:28:58,725 --> 00:29:00,056
Hold it.

341
00:29:00,727 --> 00:29:02,786
We're here for the mascot contest.

342
00:29:07,467 --> 00:29:10,664
We're here for the 
mascot contest, too.

343
00:29:10,804 --> 00:29:13,329
This is a costume?

344
00:29:13,473 --> 00:29:15,464
Worked on it all night long.

345
00:29:16,810 --> 00:29:18,607
Looks pretty real to me.

346
00:29:18,745 --> 00:29:21,145
If he were real, could I do this?

347
00:29:22,816 --> 00:29:24,477
Or this?

348
00:29:25,752 --> 00:29:30,621
If it were real, that would have 
been agonizingly painful.

349
00:29:30,757 --> 00:29:33,954
- Now watch this!
- That's quite enough, boys.

350
00:29:34,094 --> 00:29:37,894
Thank you to Professor Primbotom
and his lecture ...

351
00:29:38,031 --> 00:29:39,430
on "just say nay".

352
00:29:40,367 --> 00:29:44,633
And now, without further ado, let's 
give a warm Worcestershire hoozah ...

353
00:29:44,771 --> 00:29:48,263
to the winner
of our mascot contest, the ...

354
00:29:49,443 --> 00:29:50,432
ogre?

355
00:29:52,512 --> 00:29:54,810
That's right. I'm the new mascot.

356
00:29:54,948 --> 00:29:58,577
So let's really try and beat
the other guys at ...

357
00:29:58,719 --> 00:30:01,847
whatever it is they're doing!

358
00:30:05,392 --> 00:30:08,384
This is all a bit unorthodox ...

359
00:30:08,528 --> 00:30:12,191
Where can I find Arthur Pendragon?

360
00:30:14,468 --> 00:30:15,958
Hey, wait ...

361
00:30:20,073 --> 00:30:21,700
Classic.

362
00:30:21,842 --> 00:30:23,537
You should be ashamed of yourself!

363
00:30:23,677 --> 00:30:26,077
I didn't do it. They did.

364
00:30:30,884 --> 00:30:32,613
Please don't eat me.

365
00:30:32,753 --> 00:30:35,085
Eat him! Eat him! Eat him!

366
00:30:36,089 --> 00:30:38,751
I'm not here to eat him!

367
00:30:40,227 --> 00:30:42,855
Time to pack up
your toothbrush and jammies.

368
00:30:42,996 --> 00:30:45,226
You're the new King of "Far Far Away".

369
00:30:45,365 --> 00:30:47,026
What?

370
00:30:48,568 --> 00:30:52,766
Artie a king?
More like the Mayor of Loserville!

371
00:30:57,511 --> 00:30:58,500
Burn.

372
00:31:02,115 --> 00:31:03,241
Is this for real?

373
00:31:03,383 --> 00:31:07,786
Absolutely. Clean out your locker, kid.
You have a kingdom to run.

374
00:31:07,921 --> 00:31:10,583
So, wait ... 
I'm really the only heir?

375
00:31:11,925 --> 00:31:13,256
The one and only.

376
00:31:14,594 --> 00:31:16,255
Give me a second.

377
00:31:18,598 --> 00:31:20,259
My good people ...

378
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:23,130
there's a lesson here for all of us.

379
00:31:23,270 --> 00:31:27,570
Next time you're about to dunk a kid's
head in a chamber pot, stop and think,

380
00:31:27,708 --> 00:31:30,199
"Hey, maybe this guy has feelings.

381
00:31:30,944 --> 00:31:33,310
Maybe I should cut him some slack.

382
00:31:33,447 --> 00:31:36,814
'Cause maybe ... just maybe ...

383
00:31:36,950 --> 00:31:40,647
this guy's gonna turn out to be,
I don't know, a king?

384
00:31:40,787 --> 00:31:45,815
Maybe his first royal decree will be to
banish everyone who ever picked on him."

385
00:31:45,959 --> 00:31:48,826
I'm looking at you, jousting team!

386
00:31:49,162 --> 00:31:52,359
And Guin? Oh, Guin.

387
00:31:53,233 --> 00:31:54,564
I've always loved you.

388
00:31:56,436 --> 00:31:58,996
Good friends, 
it breaks my heart, but ...

389
00:31:59,139 --> 00:32:02,631
enjoy your stay here in prison
while I rule the free world!

390
00:32:02,776 --> 00:32:04,368
Okay, let's not overdo it.

391
00:32:04,511 --> 00:32:07,844
I'm building my city, people ...
on rock 'n' roll!

392
00:32:07,981 --> 00:32:09,846
You just overdid it.

393
00:32:18,992 --> 00:32:20,619
Look at you!

394
00:32:20,761 --> 00:32:22,285
You look darling.

395
00:32:22,429 --> 00:32:24,624
Just precious. Look at her.

396
00:32:24,765 --> 00:32:27,131
Any cravings since you got pregnant?

397
00:32:27,267 --> 00:32:29,895
No. Not at all.

398
00:32:30,737 --> 00:32:32,466
Do you smell ham?

399
00:32:32,606 --> 00:32:35,734
It's present time!

400
00:32:37,611 --> 00:32:41,672
Fiona, please open mine first.
It's the one in front.

401
00:32:41,815 --> 00:32:46,445
"Congratulations on your new
mess mak ..." Oh, mess maker!

402
00:32:46,586 --> 00:32:49,578
"Hopefully this helps.
Love, Cinderella."

403
00:32:50,924 --> 00:32:52,585
- Look at that!
- What is it?

404
00:32:54,161 --> 00:32:56,629
It's for the poopies.

405
00:32:56,763 --> 00:32:58,321
Wait ... babies poop?

406
00:32:58,465 --> 00:32:59,796
Everyone poops, Beauty.

407
00:32:59,933 --> 00:33:01,400
Fiona!

408
00:33:01,535 --> 00:33:04,368
We all chipped in
for a little present, too.

409
00:33:05,272 --> 00:33:06,830
Ta-da!

410
00:33:08,041 --> 00:33:10,874
You know the baby will love it,
because I do!

411
00:33:11,011 --> 00:33:13,980
Guys, that's so sweet. Thank you.

412
00:33:14,114 --> 00:33:15,513
Who's this one from?

413
00:33:15,649 --> 00:33:18,584
I got you the biggest one,
because I love you most.

414
00:33:18,718 --> 00:33:21,778
"Have one on me. Love, Snow White."

415
00:33:24,624 --> 00:33:26,251
What is it?

416
00:33:26,393 --> 00:33:27,917
He's a live-in babysitter.

417
00:33:28,061 --> 00:33:29,153
Where's the baby?

418
00:33:29,296 --> 00:33:33,357
You're too kind, Snow,
but I can't accept this.

419
00:33:33,500 --> 00:33:35,866
It's nothing. 
I have six more at home.

420
00:33:36,002 --> 00:33:37,765
- What does he do?
- Cleaning.

421
00:33:37,904 --> 00:33:39,496
- Feeding.
- Burping.

422
00:33:39,639 --> 00:33:42,107
So, what are
Shrek and I supposed to do?

423
00:33:42,242 --> 00:33:44,369
Work on your marriage.

424
00:33:44,511 --> 00:33:48,379
Thanks, Rapunzel.
What's that supposed to mean?

425
00:33:48,515 --> 00:33:52,542
Come on now, Fiona.
You know what happens.

426
00:33:53,487 --> 00:33:55,512
You're tired all the time.

427
00:33:55,655 --> 00:33:57,384
You start letting yourself go.

428
00:33:57,524 --> 00:33:58,684
Stretch marks.

429
00:33:58,825 --> 00:34:00,156
Say goodbye to romance.

430
00:34:02,496 --> 00:34:05,932
I'm sorry, but how many
of you have kids?

431
00:34:06,066 --> 00:34:07,624
She's right!

432
00:34:07,767 --> 00:34:12,204
A baby will only strengthen the 
love Shrek and Fiona have.

433
00:34:12,339 --> 00:34:15,172
How did Shrek react 
when you told him?

434
00:34:16,343 --> 00:34:19,506
When he first found out, Shrek said ...

435
00:34:32,359 --> 00:34:36,693
Onward, my new friends!
To our happily ever afters!

436
00:34:42,369 --> 00:34:44,530
Now ... bombs away!

437
00:35:01,054 --> 00:35:03,921
Well, well, well. 
If it isn't Peter Pan.

438
00:35:04,057 --> 00:35:06,525
- His name's not Peter.
- Shut it, Wendy.

439
00:35:25,078 --> 00:35:28,741
Enough pillaging! To the castle!

440
00:35:47,100 --> 00:35:48,567
You go! Take care of the baby!

441
00:35:48,702 --> 00:35:51,865
Everybody stay calm! 
We're going to die!

442
00:35:56,276 --> 00:35:58,403
Everyone in! Now!

443
00:35:58,545 --> 00:36:00,672
Come on! Put some back into it!

444
00:36:04,017 --> 00:36:05,507
We don't have time. Now go!

445
00:36:05,652 --> 00:36:07,449
Quickly, ladies!

446
00:36:09,723 --> 00:36:11,281
We'll hold them off 
as long as we can!

447
00:36:26,973 --> 00:36:29,373
Where are Shrek and Fiona?

448
00:36:29,509 --> 00:36:31,670
The name doesn't ring a bell.

449
00:36:31,811 --> 00:36:33,506
No bell.

450
00:36:33,647 --> 00:36:37,014
I suggest you freaks cooperate ...

451
00:36:37,150 --> 00:36:39,744
with the new King of "Far Far Away"!

452
00:36:39,886 --> 00:36:43,583
The only thing you're ever gonna
be king of is King of the Stupids!

453
00:36:43,723 --> 00:36:46,021
- Hook!
- Right!

454
00:36:46,159 --> 00:36:48,389
Avast, ye cookie.

455
00:36:50,997 --> 00:36:52,658
Start talking.

456
00:36:57,037 --> 00:36:58,527
- Gingy!
- Papa!

457
00:36:58,672 --> 00:37:00,037
Settle down now.

458
00:37:14,020 --> 00:37:17,319
♪ On the good ship Lollipop ♪

459
00:37:17,457 --> 00:37:20,893
♪ It's a sweet trip to the candy shop ♪

460
00:37:21,027 --> 00:37:22,016
You!

461
00:37:22,862 --> 00:37:25,057
You can't lie.

462
00:37:25,198 --> 00:37:28,861
So tell me, puppet ... where is Shrek?

463
00:37:31,871 --> 00:37:35,102
Well ... I don't know where he's not.

464
00:37:35,241 --> 00:37:37,436
You don't know where Shrek is?

465
00:37:37,577 --> 00:37:40,171
It wouldn't be inaccurate 
to assume ...

466
00:37:40,313 --> 00:37:44,579
that I couldn't exactly not say that
is or isn't almost partially incorrect.

467
00:37:44,718 --> 00:37:46,083
So you do know where he is!

468
00:37:46,219 --> 00:37:48,744
On the contrary,
I'm possibly more or less ...

469
00:37:48,888 --> 00:37:51,118
not definitely rejecting the idea ...

470
00:37:51,257 --> 00:37:54,920
that in no way,
with any amount of uncertainty ...

471
00:37:55,061 --> 00:37:56,050
Stop it!

472
00:37:56,196 --> 00:37:58,323
I do not know where he shouldn't be.

473
00:37:58,465 --> 00:38:00,933
If that indeed wasn't where he isn't.

474
00:38:01,067 --> 00:38:04,662
Even if he wasn't not where
I knew he was, it could mean ...

475
00:38:04,804 --> 00:38:07,034
♪ On the good ship Lollipop ♪

476
00:38:07,173 --> 00:38:11,576
Enough! Shrek went off
to bring back the next heir!

477
00:38:14,581 --> 00:38:16,378
He's bringing back the next heir?

478
00:38:16,516 --> 00:38:18,006
No!

479
00:38:19,252 --> 00:38:22,449
Hook! Get rid of this new "King".

480
00:38:22,589 --> 00:38:24,454
But bring Shrek to me.

481
00:38:24,591 --> 00:38:27,788
I have something special
in mind for him.

482
00:38:27,927 --> 00:38:30,088
He'll never fall for your tricks!

483
00:38:31,765 --> 00:38:33,426
Oh, boy.

484
00:38:43,276 --> 00:38:46,302
I can't believe it. Me, a king?

485
00:38:46,446 --> 00:38:49,472
I knew I came from royalty, but ...

486
00:38:49,616 --> 00:38:51,709
I figured everyone forgot about me.

487
00:38:51,851 --> 00:38:55,582
Oh, no. In fact the King
asked for you personally.

488
00:38:55,722 --> 00:38:58,282
Really? Wow.

489
00:38:59,626 --> 00:39:01,856
But I know 
it's not all fun and games.

490
00:39:01,995 --> 00:39:04,987
It really is
all fun and games, actually.

491
00:39:05,131 --> 00:39:08,726
Sure, you have to knight a few 
heroes, launch a ship or two.

492
00:39:08,868 --> 00:39:13,202
By the way, make sure you hit the 
boat just right with the bottle.

493
00:39:13,339 --> 00:39:16,137
Any idiot can 
hit a boat with a bottle.

494
00:39:16,976 --> 00:39:19,911
Well, I've heard
it's harder than it looks.

495
00:39:20,046 --> 00:39:22,014
This is going to be huge.

496
00:39:22,148 --> 00:39:27,017
Parties, princesses,
castles. Princesses.

497
00:39:27,153 --> 00:39:30,020
You'll be living in the lap of luxury.

498
00:39:30,156 --> 00:39:32,624
The finest chefs
will wait for your order.

499
00:39:32,759 --> 00:39:35,728
And fortunately,
you'll have the royal food tasters.

500
00:39:35,862 --> 00:39:37,557
What do they do?

501
00:39:37,697 --> 00:39:42,293
Taste the food before the King eats,
to make sure it's not poisoned.

502
00:39:42,435 --> 00:39:45,029
- Poisoned?
- Or too salty.

503
00:39:45,171 --> 00:39:48,698
Don't worry. Your bodyguards
will keep you safe.

504
00:39:48,842 --> 00:39:51,106
All of them willing
at a moment's notice.

505
00:39:51,244 --> 00:39:54,077
to lay down their lives
out of devotion to you.

506
00:39:54,214 --> 00:39:55,647
Really?

507
00:39:55,782 --> 00:39:58,808
The whole kingdom will look
to you for wisdom and guidance.

508
00:39:59,185 --> 00:40:01,119
Make sure they don't die of famine!

509
00:40:01,254 --> 00:40:02,983
- Or plague.
- Plague is bad.

510
00:40:03,122 --> 00:40:06,023
The coughing, the groaning,
the festering sores.

511
00:40:07,594 --> 00:40:12,031
Festering sores!
You are one funny kitty cat.

512
00:40:12,699 --> 00:40:14,098
What did I say?

513
00:40:14,234 --> 00:40:16,600
We don't want Artie
getting the wrong idea.

514
00:40:17,370 --> 00:40:18,530
Artie?

515
00:40:22,809 --> 00:40:24,572
There goes my hip!

516
00:40:24,711 --> 00:40:26,872
Artie! What are you doing?

517
00:40:28,815 --> 00:40:30,942
What does it look like?!

518
00:40:33,620 --> 00:40:36,088
This really isn't up to you.

519
00:40:36,222 --> 00:40:39,089
I don't know anything 
about being king!

520
00:40:39,225 --> 00:40:41,159
You'll learn on the job!

521
00:40:43,062 --> 00:40:45,587
Sorry, but I'm going back.

522
00:40:45,732 --> 00:40:48,166
Back to what? Being a loser?

523
00:40:51,738 --> 00:40:53,296
Now look what you did!

524
00:40:54,073 --> 00:40:57,907
Look what I did?
- Who's holding the wheel, chief?

525
00:40:58,912 --> 00:41:00,402
Shrek!

526
00:41:12,759 --> 00:41:14,750
Land ho!

527
00:41:27,273 --> 00:41:29,104
How humiliating.

528
00:41:30,109 --> 00:41:33,044
Oh, nice going, Your Highness.

529
00:41:33,179 --> 00:41:36,876
Now it's "Your Highness"?
What happened to "loser"?

530
00:41:37,016 --> 00:41:39,917
If you think this is getting you
out of anything, it isn't.

531
00:41:40,053 --> 00:41:43,819
We're heading back to "Far Far Away"
one way or another ...

532
00:41:43,957 --> 00:41:46,391
and you're going to be a father!

533
00:41:46,526 --> 00:41:47,959
What?

534
00:41:48,795 --> 00:41:50,353
You just said "father".

535
00:41:50,496 --> 00:41:53,226
King! You're going to be king!

536
00:41:53,366 --> 00:41:56,358
"You're going to be king!" 
Yeah, right.

537
00:41:57,570 --> 00:41:59,003
Where are you going?

538
00:41:59,138 --> 00:42:01,606
"Far Far Away" ... from you!

539
00:42:01,741 --> 00:42:03,709
Get back here, young man!

540
00:42:05,678 --> 00:42:08,169
Boss? I don't think 
he's coming back.

541
00:42:08,314 --> 00:42:11,511
Maybe it's for the best.
He's not exactly king material.

542
00:42:11,651 --> 00:42:14,882
When did you plan to tell him
you were supposed to be king?

543
00:42:15,021 --> 00:42:17,854
Come on. Why would I do that?

544
00:42:17,991 --> 00:42:21,051
Besides, he'll be ten times
better at it than me.

545
00:42:21,194 --> 00:42:25,153
Then change your tactics if you 
want to get anywhere with him.

546
00:42:27,500 --> 00:42:29,331
You're right, Donkey.

547
00:42:31,671 --> 00:42:33,195
What about this?

548
00:42:33,339 --> 00:42:37,173
- Shrek!
- Come on. It's just a joke.

549
00:42:38,745 --> 00:42:40,076
Still ...

550
00:42:56,863 --> 00:42:58,524
Listen, Artie.

551
00:42:59,098 --> 00:43:04,229
If you think this whole mad scene
ain't dope, I feel you, dude.

552
00:43:04,370 --> 00:43:08,500
I'm not trying to get up in 
your grill or raise your roof.

553
00:43:08,641 --> 00:43:10,768
But what I am screamin' is, yo ...

554
00:43:10,910 --> 00:43:14,107
check out this
kazing thazing, bazaby!

555
00:43:14,247 --> 00:43:16,340
If it doesn't groove, 
or what I'm saying ...

556
00:43:16,482 --> 00:43:19,417
ain't straight trippin',
say, "Oh, no, you didn't!

557
00:43:19,552 --> 00:43:21,986
You're getting on my last nerve."

558
00:43:22,121 --> 00:43:25,113
And then I'll know it's ...
I'll know it's wack!

559
00:43:26,726 --> 00:43:27,920
Help!

560
00:43:28,061 --> 00:43:31,462
I've been kidnapped by a monster
who's trying to relate to me!

561
00:43:31,597 --> 00:43:35,226
- Artie, wait.
- Come on! Help! Hello?

562
00:43:36,736 --> 00:43:40,433
Greetings, cosmic children
of the universe.

563
00:43:40,573 --> 00:43:42,507
Welcome to my serenity circle.

564
00:43:42,642 --> 00:43:46,772
Please leave any bad vibes
outside the healing vortex.

565
00:43:46,913 --> 00:43:48,744
Now prepare to ...

566
00:43:54,420 --> 00:43:57,253
I knew I should have got 
that warranty!

567
00:44:00,159 --> 00:44:01,626
Mr. Merlin?

568
00:44:01,761 --> 00:44:03,228
You know this guy?

569
00:44:03,362 --> 00:44:07,628
Yeah. He was the school magic teacher,
until he had his nervous breakdown.

570
00:44:07,767 --> 00:44:11,134
Technically, I was merely a victim
of a level 3 fatigue.

571
00:44:11,270 --> 00:44:13,363
At the request of my therapist,

572
00:44:13,506 --> 00:44:17,135
and the school authorities, I retired
to the tranquility of nature ...

573
00:44:17,276 --> 00:44:19,437
to discover my divine purpose.

574
00:44:20,947 --> 00:44:24,348
Can I interest anyone
in a snack or beverage?

575
00:44:24,484 --> 00:44:25,576
Uh, no.

576
00:44:25,718 --> 00:44:29,051
Sure you don't want to try
my Rock Au Gratin?

577
00:44:31,958 --> 00:44:33,425
It's organic.

578
00:44:33,559 --> 00:44:35,993
Thanks. I ate a boulder on the way in.

579
00:44:36,129 --> 00:44:39,064
We need directions to "Far Far Away".

580
00:44:39,198 --> 00:44:41,723
"We"? Who said I was going with you?

581
00:44:41,868 --> 00:44:46,237
I did. People are counting on you,
so don't try to weasel out of it.

582
00:44:46,372 --> 00:44:48,431
If the job's so great, you do it.

583
00:44:48,975 --> 00:44:53,241
Understand this, kid. No more
Mr. Nice Guy from here on out.

584
00:44:53,379 --> 00:44:55,677
That was your Mr. Nice Guy?

585
00:44:55,815 --> 00:44:57,749
Yeah, and I'm going to miss him.

586
00:44:57,884 --> 00:45:02,287
Why don't you go terrorize a 
village and leave me alone!

587
00:45:02,421 --> 00:45:06,949
Was that a crack about ogres? You get
your royal highness to "Far Far Away" ...

588
00:45:07,093 --> 00:45:11,120
before I kick it there!
Now, which way am I kicking?

589
00:45:11,264 --> 00:45:13,095
I could tell you, 
but since you're ...

590
00:45:13,232 --> 00:45:15,757
in the midst
of a self-destructive rage spiral,

591
00:45:15,902 --> 00:45:18,427
it would be karmically irresponsible.

592
00:45:18,571 --> 00:45:22,234
Self-destructive?
Are you going to help us or not?

593
00:45:22,375 --> 00:45:24,969
Most definitely, 
but only after you ...

594
00:45:25,111 --> 00:45:28,308
take the journey to your soul!

595
00:45:28,447 --> 00:45:29,812
I don't think so.

596
00:45:29,949 --> 00:45:33,783
Look pal! It's either that
or primal scream therapy.

597
00:45:35,855 --> 00:45:38,517
All right. Journey to the soul.

598
00:45:39,358 --> 00:45:41,223
Now, all of you,

599
00:45:41,360 --> 00:45:43,885
look into the Fire of Truth ...

600
00:45:44,030 --> 00:45:47,022
and tell me what you see.

601
00:45:49,869 --> 00:45:51,734
Ooh, charades!

602
00:45:51,871 --> 00:45:56,638
Okay, I see a Dutch fudge torte
with cinnamon swirls!

603
00:45:56,776 --> 00:45:59,370
Okay, monster ... go for it.

604
00:46:08,054 --> 00:46:09,749
I see a rainbow pony.

605
00:46:09,889 --> 00:46:11,823
Excellent work! Now the boy.

606
00:46:11,958 --> 00:46:13,425
This is lame.

607
00:46:13,559 --> 00:46:15,823
You're lame! Now just go for it.

608
00:46:17,396 --> 00:46:18,727
Okay.

609
00:46:19,565 --> 00:46:24,002
There's a baby bird and a father 
bird sitting in a nest.

610
00:46:24,136 --> 00:46:26,127
Yes! Stay with it!

611
00:46:26,973 --> 00:46:30,966
The dad just flew away. Why did
he leave the little bird all alone?

612
00:46:31,644 --> 00:46:35,080
It's trying to fly,
but it doesn't know how to.

613
00:46:35,982 --> 00:46:38,143
It's going to fall!

614
00:46:42,989 --> 00:46:46,982
Proper head case you are.
Really messed up.

615
00:46:50,329 --> 00:46:55,323
Okay, I get it. The bird's me.
My dad left. So what?

616
00:47:07,346 --> 00:47:10,008
Look, Artie, um ...

617
00:47:14,353 --> 00:47:17,117
Just thought I'd help set the mood ...

618
00:47:17,256 --> 00:47:20,589
for your big heart-to-heart chat.

619
00:47:29,035 --> 00:47:32,368
I know what it's like
to not feel ready for something.

620
00:47:34,707 --> 00:47:37,039
Even ogres get scared.

621
00:47:37,877 --> 00:47:40,710
You know ... once in a while.

622
00:47:42,715 --> 00:47:46,481
I know you want me
to be king, but I can't.

623
00:47:46,619 --> 00:47:49,486
I'm not cut out for it,
and I never will be.

624
00:47:50,389 --> 00:47:52,880
Even my own dad knew
I wasn't worth the trouble.

625
00:47:53,025 --> 00:47:56,222
He dumped me at that school
first chance he got ...

626
00:47:56,896 --> 00:47:59,228
and I never heard from him again.

627
00:48:00,900 --> 00:48:04,734
My dad wasn't really
the fatherly type, either.

628
00:48:05,237 --> 00:48:07,398
I doubt he was worse than mine.

629
00:48:08,240 --> 00:48:09,537
Oh, yeah?

630
00:48:09,675 --> 00:48:13,736
My father was an ogre.
He tried to eat me.

631
00:48:14,580 --> 00:48:16,775
I guess I should have realized it.

632
00:48:16,916 --> 00:48:21,182
He bathed me in barbecue sauce and
put me to bed with an apple in my mouth.

633
00:48:23,089 --> 00:48:25,580
I guess that's pretty bad.

634
00:48:27,927 --> 00:48:30,122
It may be hard to believe,

635
00:48:30,262 --> 00:48:33,720
what, with my obvious charm
and good looks,

636
00:48:33,866 --> 00:48:36,801
but people used
to think I was a monster.

637
00:48:36,936 --> 00:48:40,599
And for a long time, 
I believed them.

638
00:48:42,608 --> 00:48:44,200
But after a while,

639
00:48:44,343 --> 00:48:47,870
you learn to ignore
the names people call you ...

640
00:48:48,014 --> 00:48:50,346
and just trust who you are.

641
00:48:52,451 --> 00:48:55,614
You know ... you're okay, Shrek.

642
00:48:56,455 --> 00:49:00,016
You just need to do a little less
yelling and use a little more soap.

643
00:49:01,360 --> 00:49:02,987
Thanks, Artie.

644
00:49:03,129 --> 00:49:06,792
The soap's because
you stink ... really bad.

645
00:49:07,967 --> 00:49:10,458
Yeah ... I got that.

646
00:49:14,473 --> 00:49:17,340
This place is filthy!

647
00:49:17,643 --> 00:49:19,235
I feel like a hobo.

648
00:49:20,479 --> 00:49:23,243
I'm sorry, but this
isn't working for me.

649
00:49:23,382 --> 00:49:27,944
Everything's always about you.
It's not like your attitude is helping.

650
00:49:28,087 --> 00:49:31,784
Maybe it just bothers you
I was voted fairest in the land.

651
00:49:31,924 --> 00:49:34,017
You mean in that rigged election?

652
00:49:34,160 --> 00:49:37,129
Give me a break. 
"Rapunzel, Rapunzel ...

653
00:49:37,263 --> 00:49:40,391
let down thy golden extensions!"

654
00:49:40,533 --> 00:49:45,334
Ladies, let go of your petty complaints
and let's work together!

655
00:49:48,307 --> 00:49:51,299
So I guess the plan is
we just wander aimlessly ...

656
00:49:51,444 --> 00:49:53,537
in this stinkhole until we rot.

657
00:49:53,679 --> 00:49:57,206
No, we get inside and find out
what Charming's up to.

658
00:49:57,349 --> 00:50:00,045
I know he's a jerk and everything,

659
00:50:00,186 --> 00:50:04,350
but that Charming
makes me hotter than July.

660
00:50:05,691 --> 00:50:07,022
That's it!

661
00:50:35,054 --> 00:50:37,420
Come on! This way!

662
00:50:37,556 --> 00:50:38,545
Rapunzel, wait!

663
00:50:48,067 --> 00:50:49,898
Charming, let go of her.

664
00:50:50,035 --> 00:50:52,663
But why would I want to do that?

665
00:50:58,210 --> 00:50:59,199
What?

666
00:50:59,345 --> 00:51:04,442
Say hello, ladies,
to the new Queen of "Far Far Away".

667
00:51:08,454 --> 00:51:10,251
Rapunzel, how could you?

668
00:51:10,389 --> 00:51:12,653
Jealous much?

669
00:51:12,791 --> 00:51:15,225
Soon you'll be back
where you started,

670
00:51:15,361 --> 00:51:17,989
scrubbing floors
or locked away in towers.

671
00:51:18,130 --> 00:51:21,759
That is, if I let you last the week.

672
00:51:24,069 --> 00:51:26,663
Pookie, you promised 
not to hurt them.

673
00:51:26,805 --> 00:51:30,798
Not here, kitten whiskers.
Daddy will discuss it later.

674
00:51:31,544 --> 00:51:34,069
Now forgive us.
We have a show to put on.

675
00:51:34,213 --> 00:51:37,478
Shrek will be back soon,
and you'll be sorry.

676
00:51:37,616 --> 00:51:39,015
Sorry?!

677
00:51:39,151 --> 00:51:43,417
Don't you realize once Shrek
sets foot in "Far Far Away" ...

678
00:51:43,556 --> 00:51:45,319
he's doomed?

679
00:52:24,863 --> 00:52:26,490
Look out! They got a piano!

680
00:52:26,632 --> 00:52:29,999
Kill them all ... 
except the fat one.

681
00:52:30,135 --> 00:52:34,504
King Charming has something 
special in mind for you, ogre.

682
00:52:34,640 --> 00:52:35,937
King Charming?

683
00:52:36,075 --> 00:52:37,099
Attack!

684
00:52:43,382 --> 00:52:44,542
Artie, duck!

685
00:52:59,098 --> 00:53:00,360
Ready the plank!

686
00:53:16,081 --> 00:53:17,742
- Shrek!
- Help!

687
00:53:37,069 --> 00:53:38,366
Cowards!

688
00:53:38,504 --> 00:53:40,870
What has Charming done with Fiona?

689
00:53:41,006 --> 00:53:43,600
She's going to get 
what's coming to her.

690
00:53:44,176 --> 00:53:49,079
And there ain't nothing
you can do to stop him!

691
00:53:49,214 --> 00:53:51,739
- We've got to save her.
- But she's so far far away!

692
00:53:52,685 --> 00:53:54,983
Get yourself back
to Worcestershire, kid.

693
00:53:55,120 --> 00:53:58,612
No, Shrek. Hold on. 
I've got an idea.

694
00:53:58,757 --> 00:54:01,021
I am a buzzing bee.

695
00:54:01,694 --> 00:54:04,891
Mr. Merlin?
They need a spell to get them ...

696
00:54:05,030 --> 00:54:08,056
I mean us, back to "Far Far Away".

697
00:54:08,200 --> 00:54:11,636
Forget it. I don't have that kind
of magic in me anymore.

698
00:54:11,770 --> 00:54:15,467
How about a hug?
That's the best kind of magic.

699
00:54:15,607 --> 00:54:17,973
Please. I know you can do it.

700
00:54:18,110 --> 00:54:19,907
I said forget it!

701
00:54:20,045 --> 00:54:21,376
But ...

702
00:54:28,787 --> 00:54:30,379
What's with you?

703
00:54:31,724 --> 00:54:34,887
It's just so hard, you know?

704
00:54:35,561 --> 00:54:39,691
They need to get back,
'cause their kingdom's in trouble.

705
00:54:39,832 --> 00:54:42,357
'Cause there's a really bad man.

706
00:54:42,501 --> 00:54:44,264
It's just so hard!

707
00:54:44,403 --> 00:54:46,530
Take it easy.

708
00:54:46,672 --> 00:54:50,039
No! I don't think you understand!

709
00:54:50,175 --> 00:54:54,703
There's a mean person doing
mean things to good people.

710
00:54:54,847 --> 00:54:56,542
Have a heart, old man.

711
00:54:56,682 --> 00:55:00,846
They really need your help to get 
back. Why won't you help them?!

712
00:55:04,690 --> 00:55:06,282
Okay.

713
00:55:06,425 --> 00:55:08,416
I'll go get my things.

714
00:55:11,196 --> 00:55:12,390
Piece of cake.

715
00:55:12,531 --> 00:55:16,058
Well, well. 
You want eggs with that ham?

716
00:55:16,201 --> 00:55:19,898
I am a little rusty, so there
could be some side effects.

717
00:55:20,038 --> 00:55:21,505
- Side effects?
- Don't worry.

718
00:55:21,640 --> 00:55:25,406
Whatever it is, no mater
how excruciatingly painful,

719
00:55:25,544 --> 00:55:28,707
it will wear off eventually. 
I think.

720
00:55:30,682 --> 00:55:32,912
- Oops.
- You sure about this?

721
00:55:33,051 --> 00:55:37,181
If Artie trusts him,
that's good enough for me.

722
00:55:37,322 --> 00:55:39,187
Even if his robe doesn't cover ...

723
00:55:39,324 --> 00:55:41,849
Alacritious expeditious ...

724
00:55:41,994 --> 00:55:44,690
a- zoomy-zoom-zoom!

725
00:55:44,830 --> 00:55:47,663
Let's help our friends get back ...

726
00:55:50,402 --> 00:55:51,733
soon!

727
00:55:59,077 --> 00:56:00,669
It worked!

728
00:56:09,388 --> 00:56:12,414
I haven't been on a trip
like that since college!

729
00:56:12,858 --> 00:56:14,120
Donkey?

730
00:56:14,259 --> 00:56:17,092
What? Is something in my teeth?

731
00:56:19,531 --> 00:56:24,525
Oh, no! I've been abracadabra-ed into
a Fancy Feastin', second-rate sidekick!

732
00:56:26,872 --> 00:56:30,933
At least you don't look
like some kind of bloated piñata!

733
00:56:31,076 --> 00:56:33,135
You should think 
about going on a diet!

734
00:56:33,278 --> 00:56:37,874
You should get yourself a pair of 
pants. I feel all exposed and nasty!

735
00:56:39,551 --> 00:56:41,883
So you two think this is funny?

736
00:56:44,389 --> 00:56:46,186
I'm really sorry, guys.

737
00:56:46,325 --> 00:56:48,793
Don't be. You got us back, kid.

738
00:56:54,466 --> 00:56:56,593
How in the Hans Christian Andersen ...

739
00:56:56,735 --> 00:56:59,499
am I supposed to parade around
in these goofy boots?

740
00:56:59,638 --> 00:57:02,471
Hey, hey, hey!
Be very careful with those.

741
00:57:03,909 --> 00:57:07,242
They were made in Madrid
by the finest ...

742
00:57:07,913 --> 00:57:09,904
You'll learn to control that.

743
00:57:12,818 --> 00:57:17,812
Seriously. Ow! You need some comfort
inserts or arch supports or something.

744
00:57:23,996 --> 00:57:28,865
Watch it. I'm walking here
and I'm gonna keep going until ...

745
00:57:29,001 --> 00:57:30,093
Pinocchio!

746
00:57:30,836 --> 00:57:32,861
Shrek! Help me!

747
00:57:33,005 --> 00:57:36,202
- What happened?
- Charming and the villains took over!

748
00:57:36,341 --> 00:57:40,107
Fiona and the Princesses got away.
Now she's ...

749
00:57:40,245 --> 00:57:41,769
She's what?! What?!

750
00:57:44,116 --> 00:57:45,947
Puss! Loan me five bucks.

751
00:57:46,084 --> 00:57:48,314
You heard him. Help the brother out.

752
00:57:48,453 --> 00:57:50,546
Do you see any pockets on me?

753
00:57:50,689 --> 00:57:52,520
Hold on a second.

754
00:57:55,027 --> 00:57:59,191
I had no idea, really. 
I ... I swear.

755
00:58:00,365 --> 00:58:02,560
Quick! Where is Fiona?

756
00:58:02,701 --> 00:58:06,467
Charming has her locked away
someplace. You have to find him!

757
00:58:06,605 --> 00:58:09,472
He's probably getting ready
for the show!

758
00:58:09,608 --> 00:58:11,940
Wait, Pinocchio! What show?

759
00:58:16,949 --> 00:58:19,349
"It's a 'Happily Ever After' after all".

760
00:58:19,484 --> 00:58:21,816
"Shrek's final performance"?

761
00:58:21,954 --> 00:58:26,084
Shrek! You didn't tell us
you were in a play!

762
00:58:26,224 --> 00:58:29,682
I guess I've been so busy
I forgot to mention it.

763
00:58:29,828 --> 00:58:31,386
The ogre! Get him!

764
00:58:32,731 --> 00:58:35,063
Don't worry, jefe. I got this.

765
00:58:41,607 --> 00:58:43,234
Uck! Kill it!

766
00:58:44,242 --> 00:58:49,373
Look. Don't you know who
he thinks he is? How dare you!

767
00:58:49,514 --> 00:58:51,038
We're dealing with amateurs.

768
00:58:51,183 --> 00:58:56,120
He's a star, people! Hello?
I'm so sorry about this, Mr. Shrek.

769
00:58:56,254 --> 00:58:57,778
I'm going to lose it!

770
00:58:57,923 --> 00:59:01,723
Is everything ready? You did get
the list for the dressing room?

771
00:59:01,860 --> 00:59:04,954
Breakfast croissant stuffed
with seared sashimi tuna.

772
00:59:05,097 --> 00:59:08,396
And I hope you have the saffron corn
with jalapeno honey butter.

773
00:59:08,533 --> 00:59:11,525
Our client cannot get
into his proper emotional state ...

774
00:59:11,670 --> 00:59:13,467
without jalapeno honey butter!

775
00:59:13,605 --> 00:59:15,004
I just lost it.

776
00:59:15,774 --> 00:59:18,299
They should talk to Nancy
in Human Resources.

777
00:59:18,443 --> 00:59:21,935
Oh, we will have much to say
to Nancy, I promise!

778
00:59:23,615 --> 00:59:27,312
"With this sword, I do ..." 
No. "With ..."

779
00:59:27,452 --> 00:59:31,115
"With this sword, I do smote thee!"

780
00:59:32,024 --> 00:59:34,492
Is "smote" the right word? "Smoot"?

781
00:59:34,626 --> 00:59:36,491
I don't think that's a word.

782
00:59:36,628 --> 00:59:40,962
Maybe I should just "smite" him.
Let's try this again. Now ...

783
00:59:42,134 --> 00:59:45,297
Shrek attacks me.
I pretend to be afraid.

784
00:59:46,038 --> 00:59:50,441
"Now the kingdom will get the happily
ever after they deserve. Die, ogre!"

785
00:59:50,575 --> 00:59:54,238
Blah, blah, blah. Oh,
it just doesn't feel real enough!

786
00:59:56,148 --> 00:59:58,173
Who told you to stop dancing?!

787
00:59:58,316 --> 00:59:59,783
Wink and turn.

788
00:59:59,918 --> 01:00:03,149
What are you laying around for?
Get up! Honestly!

789
01:00:11,830 --> 01:00:15,027
Our happily ever after
is nearly complete, Mummy.

790
01:00:15,167 --> 01:00:17,362
And I assure you ...

791
01:00:17,502 --> 01:00:22,496
the people of this kingdom will 
pay dearly for every second ...

792
01:00:23,675 --> 01:00:25,336
we've had to wait.

793
01:00:26,945 --> 01:00:28,378
Break a leg.

794
01:00:28,513 --> 01:00:31,277
On second thought,
let me break it for you.

795
01:00:31,416 --> 01:00:35,716
Thank goodness. I was afraid
you wouldn't get back in time.

796
01:00:35,854 --> 01:00:37,481
Where's Fiona?

797
01:00:37,622 --> 01:00:41,854
Don't worry. She and the others
are safe ... for now.

798
01:00:51,036 --> 01:00:54,369
Let me guess. Arthur.

799
01:00:55,040 --> 01:00:57,065
It's Artie, actually.

800
01:00:57,209 --> 01:01:02,203
This boy is supposed to be
the new King of "Far Far Away"?

801
01:01:04,116 --> 01:01:05,413
How pathetic.

802
01:01:05,550 --> 01:01:08,417
Stand still, 
so I won't make a mess.

803
01:01:08,553 --> 01:01:11,989
Charming, stop! I'm here now.
You got what you wanted.

804
01:01:12,124 --> 01:01:13,785
This isn't about him.

805
01:01:14,559 --> 01:01:18,893
Then who's it about?
I'm supposed to be king, right?

806
01:01:20,232 --> 01:01:24,601
You weren't really next in line
for the throne.

807
01:01:24,736 --> 01:01:26,135
I was.

808
01:01:26,271 --> 01:01:29,604
But you said the King
asked for me personally.

809
01:01:29,741 --> 01:01:31,572
Not exactly.

810
01:01:31,710 --> 01:01:33,143
What does that mean?

811
01:01:33,278 --> 01:01:35,769
I said whatever 
I had to say, all right?

812
01:01:35,914 --> 01:01:39,611
I wasn't right for the job,
so I needed some fool to replace me.

813
01:01:39,751 --> 01:01:43,414
And you fit the bill. So just go!

814
01:01:46,491 --> 01:01:48,550
You were playing me the whole time.

815
01:01:48,693 --> 01:01:50,456
You catch on real fast, kid.

816
01:01:50,595 --> 01:01:53,689
Maybe you're not
as big of a loser as I thought.

817
01:02:00,105 --> 01:02:02,471
You know, for a minute there ...

818
01:02:02,607 --> 01:02:04,507
I actually thought ...
- What?

819
01:02:04,643 --> 01:02:08,135
That he cared about you? 
He's an ogre.

820
01:02:08,280 --> 01:02:10,111
What did you expect?

821
01:02:20,091 --> 01:02:24,118
You really do have a way
with children, Shrek.

822
01:02:36,474 --> 01:02:40,274
♪ Leave me out with the waste ♪

823
01:02:40,412 --> 01:02:43,347
♪ This is not what I do ♪

824
01:02:43,481 --> 01:02:47,178
♪ It's the wrong time ♪

825
01:02:47,319 --> 01:02:50,015
♪ She's pulling me through ♪

826
01:02:50,155 --> 01:02:53,852
♪ It's a small crime ♪

827
01:02:53,992 --> 01:02:56,620
♪ And I got no excuse ♪

828
01:02:56,761 --> 01:02:59,161
♪ And is that all right, yeah? ♪

829
01:03:00,632 --> 01:03:02,657
♪ Is that all right with you? ♪

830
01:03:03,501 --> 01:03:07,835
♪ Is that all right, yeah? ♪

831
01:03:08,340 --> 01:03:12,333
♪ If I give my gun away 
when it's loaded? ♪

832
01:03:14,512 --> 01:03:19,176
♪ If you don't shoot it
how am I supposed to hold it? ♪

833
01:03:22,354 --> 01:03:25,221
♪ Is that all right?
Is that all right? ♪

834
01:03:25,357 --> 01:03:28,793
♪ Is that all right with you? ♪

835
01:03:28,927 --> 01:03:29,394
♪ No. ♪

836
01:03:29,394 --> 01:03:29,792
♪ No. ♪

837
01:03:30,128 --> 01:03:31,959
Had we stayed put like I suggested,

838
01:03:32,097 --> 01:03:34,895
we'd be sipping tea
out of little heart-shaped cups.

839
01:03:35,033 --> 01:03:36,557
Yeah, heart-shaped cups.

840
01:03:36,701 --> 01:03:39,329
And eating crumpets
smothered with loganberries.

841
01:03:39,471 --> 01:03:41,063
Yeah, loganberries.

842
01:03:41,206 --> 01:03:43,071
- Shut up, Cindy.
- Yeah, shut up.

843
01:03:43,208 --> 01:03:46,075
- No, you shut up.
- Stay out of this.

844
01:03:46,211 --> 01:03:49,009
Who cares who's 
"running the kingdom"?

845
01:03:49,147 --> 01:03:52,378
- I care.
- You should all care too.

846
01:03:56,354 --> 01:03:59,255
I have your badge number, tin can!

847
01:03:59,391 --> 01:04:01,256
- Donkey?
- Princess!

848
01:04:01,393 --> 01:04:02,382
Puss?

849
01:04:02,527 --> 01:04:06,588
I am Puss, stuck here
inside this hideous body.

850
01:04:06,731 --> 01:04:07,755
And I'm me!

851
01:04:07,899 --> 01:04:09,025
But you're ...

852
01:04:09,167 --> 01:04:11,829
Everything's fruity in the loops,
but what happened is,

853
01:04:11,970 --> 01:04:13,938
we went to high school,
the boat crashed ...

854
01:04:14,072 --> 01:04:16,632
and we got bippity-boppity-booped
by the magic man.

855
01:04:16,775 --> 01:04:18,970
You poor sweet things.

856
01:04:19,110 --> 01:04:20,509
I don't get it.

857
01:04:20,645 --> 01:04:24,376
The cat turned into a little horse
that smells like feet. What's to get?

858
01:04:24,516 --> 01:04:25,881
Who dat?

859
01:04:26,017 --> 01:04:27,041
Where's Shrek?

860
01:04:27,185 --> 01:04:31,178
Charming has him. He plans to kill Shrek
tonight in front of the whole kingdom!

861
01:04:32,590 --> 01:04:36,754
All right, everyone.
We need to find a way out now.

862
01:04:36,895 --> 01:04:40,422
You're right.
Ladies, assume the position!

863
01:04:45,303 --> 01:04:46,497
What are you doing?

864
01:04:47,272 --> 01:04:48,637
Waiting to be rescued.

865
01:04:48,773 --> 01:04:50,741
You've got to be kidding me.

866
01:04:50,875 --> 01:04:53,639
What else can we do? 
We're just four ...

867
01:04:53,778 --> 01:04:57,077
I mean three, 
super-hot princesses ...

868
01:04:57,215 --> 01:05:01,276
two circus freaks, a pregnant 
ogre and an old lady!

869
01:05:02,120 --> 01:05:06,454
Excuse me. 
Old lady coming through.

870
01:05:15,066 --> 01:05:16,863
Mom!

871
01:05:17,002 --> 01:05:21,268
You didn't think you got your fighting
skills from your father, did you?

872
01:05:21,406 --> 01:05:24,136
Excuse me. There's still one more.

873
01:05:34,319 --> 01:05:36,651
Why don't you just lie down?

874
01:05:39,324 --> 01:05:42,191
Okay, girls, from here on out ...

875
01:05:42,327 --> 01:05:44,795
we take care of business ourselves.

876
01:06:01,846 --> 01:06:06,374
The "Far Far Away" Theatre at the
Charming Pavilion is proud to present ...

877
01:06:06,518 --> 01:06:08,281
"It's A Happily 'Ever After', 
after all."

878
01:06:08,420 --> 01:06:11,719
Enjoy your evening
of theatrical reverie, citizen.

879
01:06:11,856 --> 01:06:15,189
Oi! No food or beverages 
in the theater!

880
01:06:29,040 --> 01:06:30,405
Places, everyone!

881
01:06:35,547 --> 01:06:36,673
Easy!

882
01:06:36,815 --> 01:06:40,717
Sorry. I was showing off
for the little one.

883
01:06:41,453 --> 01:06:45,048
It's Bring Your Kids to Work Day.
Come here, beautiful.

884
01:06:48,226 --> 01:06:51,218
Well, she's got your eye.

885
01:06:52,464 --> 01:06:57,401
Who would have thought a monster like
me deserved something as special as you?

886
01:07:39,077 --> 01:07:42,103
♪ Little birdies, take wing ♪

887
01:07:42,947 --> 01:07:45,575
♪ Flitting down 
from the trees they appear ♪

888
01:07:45,717 --> 01:07:48,185
♪ And to chirp in my ear ♪

889
01:07:49,454 --> 01:07:52,446
♪ All because I sing ♪

890
01:08:22,086 --> 01:08:23,144
Move it! Go!

891
01:08:29,761 --> 01:08:31,490
My babies!

892
01:08:32,497 --> 01:08:33,486
Help!

893
01:09:19,043 --> 01:09:21,034
Hey, how's it goin'?

894
01:09:31,723 --> 01:09:33,657
O to the K. The coast is clear.

895
01:09:33,791 --> 01:09:36,419
Let's do this. Go, Team Dynamite!

896
01:09:36,561 --> 01:09:40,395
I thought we agreed to use the name
Team Super Cool.

897
01:09:40,531 --> 01:09:42,761
I recall it was Team Awesome.

898
01:09:42,900 --> 01:09:44,834
I voted for Team Alpha Wolf Squadron.

899
01:09:44,969 --> 01:09:46,937
Okay! From henceforth,

900
01:09:47,071 --> 01:09:51,201
we will be Team Alpha Super Awesome
Cool Dynamite Wolf Squadron.

901
01:09:51,342 --> 01:09:55,574
Ach du Lieber! There is some strange
little girl over there staring at us!

902
01:09:56,514 --> 01:09:57,879
Artie!

903
01:09:58,016 --> 01:09:59,381
Wait, wait!

904
01:09:59,517 --> 01:10:01,712
Where is the fire, señor?

905
01:10:01,853 --> 01:10:03,878
Please. Don't act so innocent.

906
01:10:04,022 --> 01:10:07,788
You both knew what was going on
and kept it to yourselves.

907
01:10:07,925 --> 01:10:09,517
It's not like it seems.

908
01:10:09,661 --> 01:10:12,494
It's not? 
I think it seems pretty clear.

909
01:10:12,630 --> 01:10:15,155
He was using me. 
That's all there is to it.

910
01:10:15,300 --> 01:10:17,734
Using you? You really don't get it.

911
01:10:17,869 --> 01:10:20,861
Shrek only said
those things to protect you.

912
01:10:21,539 --> 01:10:26,203
Charming was going to kill you, 
Artie! Shrek saved your life.

913
01:10:36,788 --> 01:10:38,380
Cue the spot!

914
01:10:42,226 --> 01:10:44,751
♪ I wait alone up here ♪

915
01:10:44,896 --> 01:10:47,592
♪ I'm trapped another day ♪

916
01:10:47,732 --> 01:10:50,929
♪ Locked up here, 
please set me free ♪

917
01:10:51,069 --> 01:10:54,095
♪ My new life I almost see ♪

918
01:10:54,238 --> 01:10:56,934
♪ A castle, you and me ♪

919
01:10:57,075 --> 01:11:02,172
♪ Yes, a castle, you and me ♪

920
01:11:04,248 --> 01:11:05,306
Cherubs!

921
01:11:09,253 --> 01:11:13,053
♪ Tis I, Tis I.
Upon my regal steed ♪

922
01:11:13,191 --> 01:11:14,818
♪ Princess, my love ♪

923
01:11:14,959 --> 01:11:17,723
♪ At last you shall be freed.
I'm strong ♪

924
01:11:17,862 --> 01:11:19,830
♪ And brave,
And dashing my way there ♪

925
01:11:20,264 --> 01:11:25,930
♪ With speed! With might!
With soft and bouncy hair! ♪

926
01:11:26,904 --> 01:11:30,670
♪ Through the blistering desert.
- Hot! ♪

927
01:11:30,808 --> 01:11:33,834
♪ Across the stormiest sea.
- Wet! ♪

928
01:11:33,978 --> 01:11:35,969
♪ Facing creatures so vile ♪

929
01:11:36,114 --> 01:11:37,240
♪ Foul! ♪

930
01:11:37,382 --> 01:11:41,512
So you can gaze upon me!

931
01:11:42,820 --> 01:11:45,152
♪ I knew you'd come for me ♪

932
01:11:45,289 --> 01:11:49,123
♪ And now we finally meet ♪

933
01:11:49,260 --> 01:11:50,727
♪ I knew you'd wait ♪

934
01:11:50,862 --> 01:11:55,390
♪ And from my plate of love you'd eat ♪

935
01:12:15,319 --> 01:12:18,652
♪ Who is this terribly ugly fiend
Who so rudely intervened? ♪

936
01:12:18,790 --> 01:12:20,621
♪ Will Charming fight or flee? ♪

937
01:12:20,758 --> 01:12:21,816
♪ Please rescue me! ♪

938
01:12:21,959 --> 01:12:23,654
♪ From this monstrosity! ♪

939
01:12:23,795 --> 01:12:28,823
♪ Fear thee not, honey lamb!
I will slice this thing up like a ham! ♪

940
01:12:30,001 --> 01:12:31,468
Oh, boy.

941
01:12:31,602 --> 01:12:35,197
♪ You are about to enter 
a world of pain ♪

942
01:12:35,339 --> 01:12:39,673
♪ With which you are not familiar! ♪

943
01:12:43,114 --> 01:12:47,517
It can't be any more painful than 
your lousy performance you are giving.

944
01:12:51,189 --> 01:12:53,180
"Prepare, foul beast."

945
01:12:55,293 --> 01:12:58,558
Prepare, foul beast, 
your time is done!

946
01:12:58,696 --> 01:13:01,859
Could you kill me and then sing?

947
01:13:03,367 --> 01:13:05,062
Be quiet!

948
01:13:05,203 --> 01:13:09,333
I'm just having fun with you.
That's actually a very nice leotard.

949
01:13:09,474 --> 01:13:10,736
Thank you.

950
01:13:10,875 --> 01:13:12,968
Do they come in men's sizes?

951
01:13:16,047 --> 01:13:17,776
Now that be funny!

952
01:13:17,915 --> 01:13:19,883
Enough!

953
01:13:22,286 --> 01:13:26,086
Now you'll finally
know what it's like ...

954
01:13:26,224 --> 01:13:29,751
to have everything you worked for ...

955
01:13:29,894 --> 01:13:33,921
everything that's precious to you,
taken away.

956
01:13:34,065 --> 01:13:37,398
Now you'll know how I felt.

957
01:13:44,742 --> 01:13:46,403
Sausage roll!

958
01:14:03,761 --> 01:14:06,286
Pray for mercy from Puss!

959
01:14:06,430 --> 01:14:07,920
And Donkey!

960
01:14:08,132 --> 01:14:09,190
D

961
01:14:20,211 --> 01:14:21,473
Hi, honey.

962
01:14:21,612 --> 01:14:24,638
Sorry we're late. You okay?

963
01:14:24,782 --> 01:14:27,114
Much better, 
now that you're here.

964
01:14:29,787 --> 01:14:34,986
So, Charming, you want to let me out of
these so we can settle this ogre-to-man?

965
01:14:35,126 --> 01:14:39,460
Ooh, that sounds fun.
But I have a better idea.

966
01:14:55,313 --> 01:14:57,713
No! Let go of me!

967
01:14:57,848 --> 01:15:01,978
You will not ruin things
this time, ogre. Kill it.

968
01:15:05,823 --> 01:15:07,586
Everybody, stop!

969
01:15:09,427 --> 01:15:11,520
Oh, what is it now?!

970
01:15:11,662 --> 01:15:12,924
Artie?

971
01:15:22,607 --> 01:15:25,075
Who thinks we need
to settle things this way?

972
01:15:29,347 --> 01:15:33,044
You mean you want to be villains
your whole lives?

973
01:15:33,184 --> 01:15:36,984
But we are villains!
It's the only thing we know.

974
01:15:37,121 --> 01:15:39,555
You never wish
you could be something else?

975
01:15:39,690 --> 01:15:43,148
Easy for you to say. You're not
some evil enchanted tree.

976
01:15:43,294 --> 01:15:46,058
You morons! 
Don't listen to him! Attack!

977
01:15:46,197 --> 01:15:48,995
What Steve means is
it's hard to come by honest work ...

978
01:15:49,133 --> 01:15:51,158
when the whole world's against you.

979
01:15:51,302 --> 01:15:53,031
Right. Thanks, Ed.

980
01:15:53,170 --> 01:15:57,573
Fair enough. You're right.
I'm not a talking tree.

981
01:15:57,708 --> 01:15:58,800
But you know ...

982
01:15:58,943 --> 01:16:02,071
a good friend once told me ...

983
01:16:02,213 --> 01:16:07,241
just because people treat you
like a villain, or an ogre ...

984
01:16:07,385 --> 01:16:09,376
or just some loser ...

985
01:16:10,888 --> 01:16:12,788
doesn't mean you are one.

986
01:16:15,660 --> 01:16:19,528
What maters most
is what you think of yourself.

987
01:16:19,664 --> 01:16:23,964
If there's something you really want,
or someone you want to be ...

988
01:16:24,101 --> 01:16:27,730
the only person standing
in your way is you.

989
01:16:28,239 --> 01:16:30,002
- Me?
- Get him!

990
01:16:30,141 --> 01:16:31,540
No, no, no!

991
01:16:31,676 --> 01:16:34,611
What I mean is each of you ...

992
01:16:34,745 --> 01:16:37,009
is standing in your own way.

993
01:16:40,918 --> 01:16:43,409
I always wanted to play the flute.

994
01:16:43,554 --> 01:16:47,217
I'd like to open up 
a spa ... in France!

995
01:16:47,358 --> 01:16:51,920
I grow daffodils. 
And they're beautiful.

996
01:17:40,644 --> 01:17:43,807
A new era finally begins!

997
01:17:45,649 --> 01:17:47,310
Now all of you ...

998
01:17:48,152 --> 01:17:50,552
bow before your King!

999
01:17:56,994 --> 01:17:59,326
You need to work on your aim.

1000
01:18:01,665 --> 01:18:04,532
This was supposed to be
my happily ever after!

1001
01:18:04,668 --> 01:18:07,159
Well, you need to keep looking ...

1002
01:18:09,173 --> 01:18:11,232
because I'm not giving up mine.

1003
01:18:16,514 --> 01:18:17,674
Mommy?

1004
01:18:29,026 --> 01:18:31,187
It's yours if you want it.

1005
01:18:31,862 --> 01:18:34,194
But this time it's your choice.

1006
01:18:56,887 --> 01:18:57,911
Author!

1007
01:18:58,055 --> 01:19:01,388
Artie! Artie! Artie! Artie!

1008
01:19:05,729 --> 01:19:08,721
Excuse me. That's my seat.

1009
01:19:09,733 --> 01:19:14,500
Okay, Señor Hocusy-Pocusy, the time
has come to rectify some wrongs!

1010
01:19:14,638 --> 01:19:17,163
Though I have been enjoying
these cat baths.

1011
01:19:17,308 --> 01:19:18,798
Please say you didn't.

1012
01:19:18,943 --> 01:19:20,843
All right! Look.

1013
01:19:20,978 --> 01:19:24,277
You'll feel a pinch and possibly
lower intestinal discomfort ...

1014
01:19:24,415 --> 01:19:26,747
but this should do the trick.

1015
01:19:30,988 --> 01:19:33,456
- Are you?
- I'm me again!

1016
01:19:33,591 --> 01:19:35,855
- And I am not you!
- All right!

1017
01:19:37,428 --> 01:19:38,588
Oops.

1018
01:19:40,598 --> 01:19:41,997
Ah, never mind.

1019
01:19:46,003 --> 01:19:50,064
What did I tell you?
The kid's going to be a great king.

1020
01:19:50,207 --> 01:19:53,768
Well, for what it's worth,
you would have, too.

1021
01:19:55,279 --> 01:19:58,271
I have something
much more important in mind.

1022
01:20:23,807 --> 01:20:25,035
Finally.

1023
01:20:31,815 --> 01:20:33,146
Dada.

1024
01:20:35,252 --> 01:20:39,621
♪ Was I wrong about the world?
It's a beautiful new place ♪

1025
01:20:39,757 --> 01:20:42,248
I smell Shrek Junior!

1026
01:20:42,393 --> 01:20:45,055
♪ Where else could a creep like me ♪

1027
01:20:45,195 --> 01:20:47,925
♪ Meet such a pretty face ♪

1028
01:20:48,065 --> 01:20:52,001
♪ Meeting every day 
with the rising sun ♪

1029
01:20:54,805 --> 01:20:57,706
♪ Looking up, it's looking like ♪

1030
01:20:57,841 --> 01:21:00,503
♪ My losing streak is done ♪

1031
01:21:01,412 --> 01:21:02,709
Peek-a-boo!

1032
01:21:02,846 --> 01:21:04,177
Peek-a-boo!

1033
01:21:07,384 --> 01:21:09,215
A bouncy, bouncy, boy!

1034
01:21:09,353 --> 01:21:12,049
♪ Used to always feel like ♪

1035
01:21:12,189 --> 01:21:14,851
♪ Wished that I was dressed better ♪

1036
01:21:15,859 --> 01:21:17,520
Where's the baby?

1037
01:21:17,661 --> 01:21:22,030
♪ Never had a lot of luck
until I finally met her ♪

1038
01:21:31,542 --> 01:21:35,535
♪ Meeting every day 
with the rising sun ♪

1039
01:21:38,215 --> 01:21:40,376
♪ Looking up, it's looking like ♪

1040
01:21:41,051 --> 01:21:43,884
♪ My losing streak is done ♪

1041
01:21:46,056 --> 01:21:48,388
♪ My losing streak is done ♪

1042
01:21:59,236 --> 01:22:01,898
Well ... what shall we do now?

1043
01:22:17,921 --> 01:22:19,582
I got it.

1044
01:22:26,096 --> 01:22:30,465
♪ Puss and Donkey, baby!
Once again, come on! ♪

1045
01:22:30,601 --> 01:22:35,231
♪ I want to thank you 
for letting me be myself ♪

1046
01:22:35,372 --> 01:22:36,464
♪ Again! ♪

1047
01:22:36,607 --> 01:22:38,472
♪ Look at my hips! ♪

1048
01:22:38,609 --> 01:22:43,808
♪ I want to thank you 
for letting me be myself ♪

1049
01:22:43,947 --> 01:22:45,437
♪ Again! ♪

1050
01:22:50,721 --> 01:22:52,245
♪ - Break it down!
- Let's go! ♪

1051
01:22:52,389 --> 01:22:54,789
♪ Stiff all in the collar ♪

1052
01:22:56,627 --> 01:22:58,788
♪ Fluffy in the face ♪

1053
01:23:00,964 --> 01:23:03,455
♪ Chit chat chatter trying ♪

1054
01:23:04,802 --> 01:23:06,963
♪ Stuffy in the place ♪

1055
01:23:09,139 --> 01:23:11,972
♪ Thank you for the par-tay ♪

1056
01:23:13,143 --> 01:23:15,008
♪ But I could never stay ♪

1057
01:23:15,145 --> 01:23:16,476
♪ I'm sorry. ♪

1058
01:23:17,147 --> 01:23:20,139
♪ I got many things on my mind ♪

1059
01:23:21,485 --> 01:23:23,646
♪ But the word's in the way ♪

1060
01:23:24,655 --> 01:23:29,854
♪ And I want to thank you 
for letting me be myself ♪

1061
01:23:29,993 --> 01:23:31,324
♪ Again ♪

1062
01:23:32,329 --> 01:23:34,297
♪ Different strokes 
for different folks ♪

1063
01:23:34,431 --> 01:23:38,026
♪ Thank you for letting 
me be myself ♪

1064
01:23:38,168 --> 01:23:39,658
♪ Again ♪

1065
01:23:41,839 --> 01:23:43,329
♪ Break it down! ♪

1066
01:23:44,341 --> 01:23:47,504
♪ Puss and Donkey, baby!
Puss and Donkey, baby! ♪

1067
01:23:48,011 --> 01:23:49,672
♪ Puss and Donkey, baby! ♪

1068
01:23:51,014 --> 01:23:53,175
♪ Dance to the music ♪

1069
01:23:55,018 --> 01:23:57,350
♪ All night long ♪

1070
01:23:59,356 --> 01:24:01,688
♪ Everyday people ♪

1071
01:24:03,360 --> 01:24:05,521
♪ Sing a simple song ♪

1072
01:24:07,531 --> 01:24:10,022
♪ Mama's so happy ♪

1073
01:24:11,869 --> 01:24:13,860
♪ Mama start to cry ♪

1074
01:24:16,039 --> 01:24:18,530
♪ Papa's still singing ♪

1075
01:24:19,710 --> 01:24:23,202
♪ You can make it 
if you try. So try! ♪

1076
01:24:24,381 --> 01:24:28,249
♪ Thank you for letting 
me be myself ♪

1077
01:24:28,385 --> 01:24:29,716
♪ Again ♪

1078
01:24:32,723 --> 01:24:36,591
♪ Thank you for letting 
me be myself ♪

1079
01:24:36,727 --> 01:24:38,422
♪ Again ♪

1080
01:24:38,562 --> 01:24:41,429
♪ Come on, Donkey. 
Do something right! ♪

1081
01:24:41,565 --> 01:24:43,965
♪ Put the hoofs together!
Put the hoofs together! ♪

1082
01:24:45,068 --> 01:24:49,266
♪ Stomp your boots, baby! Stomp your
boots, baby! Stomp your boots, baby! ♪

1083
01:24:49,406 --> 01:24:53,274
♪ Thank you for letting 
me be myself ♪

1084
01:24:53,410 --> 01:24:54,900
♪ Again ♪

1085
01:24:57,080 --> 01:25:01,608
♪ I want to thank you 
for letting me be myself ♪

1086
01:25:01,752 --> 01:25:02,844
♪ Again ♪

1087
01:25:02,986 --> 01:25:05,955
♪ Thank you, thank you, thank you. ♪

1088
01:25:06,089 --> 01:25:09,286
♪ Want to thank you
Just to be my ♪

1089
01:25:09,426 --> 01:25:12,293
♪ Because I just want to be my ...
See? ♪

1090
01:25:12,429 --> 01:25:15,125
♪ Can I, can I thank you!
Can I ♪

1091
01:25:15,265 --> 01:25:17,096
♪ Yes! Yes! ♪