1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:04,129 Improved By: Fidel33 Sub Upload Date: November 20, 2015 2 00:00:04,130 --> 00:00:09,093 (WIND HOWLING) 3 00:00:36,204 --> 00:00:39,457 (FABRIC FLAPPING) 4 00:00:45,338 --> 00:00:48,716 - (WIND CONTINUES HOWLING) - (SNOW PATTERS) 5 00:00:59,477 --> 00:01:03,565 (LIGHT SNORING) 6 00:01:15,493 --> 00:01:18,288 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 7 00:01:46,691 --> 00:01:49,068 (METAL PICK HITS ICE) 8 00:01:51,696 --> 00:01:53,948 (CREAKING) 9 00:02:02,415 --> 00:02:05,627 (PULLEYS RATCHETING) 10 00:02:50,630 --> 00:02:52,674 - MAN #1: Mmm. - Thank you, dear. 11 00:02:52,757 --> 00:02:54,842 WOMAN: 'Cause they're extra-special, filled with... 12 00:02:54,926 --> 00:02:55,885 MAN #2: Brussels sprouts. 13 00:02:55,968 --> 00:02:58,471 We get the surf and turf. You guys get. 14 00:02:58,554 --> 00:03:00,932 - We get the full-on Brussels sprout... - MAN #2: Nice. 15 00:03:01,015 --> 00:03:02,600 Extravaganza. 16 00:03:03,643 --> 00:03:05,186 I can always... 17 00:03:05,269 --> 00:03:08,022 put it back out there a little bit if it's not... 18 00:03:19,492 --> 00:03:23,037 WOMAN: When Conrad and I first got married, he made all these promises. 19 00:03:23,121 --> 00:03:26,416 "Oh, I'm never gonna go to the big mountains again." 20 00:03:27,625 --> 00:03:30,044 I knew he would never quit climbing... 21 00:03:30,128 --> 00:03:35,383 but it wasn't long before he was dreaming of some other big expedition. 22 00:03:35,466 --> 00:03:38,594 And I was just rolling my eyes, going, "Right, okay." 23 00:03:41,681 --> 00:03:44,308 CONRAD: High-altitude Himalayan climbing is very risky. 24 00:03:44,392 --> 00:03:46,644 It is the most dangerous professional sport. 25 00:03:46,728 --> 00:03:50,231 But I think with Meru, that risk is worth it. 26 00:03:50,314 --> 00:03:53,609 As an Alpinist, Meru is the culmination of all I've done... 27 00:03:53,693 --> 00:03:57,321 and all I've wanted to do is this peak and this climb. 28 00:03:59,157 --> 00:04:02,034 WOMAN: I knew he was gonna continue to climb forever... 29 00:04:02,118 --> 00:04:04,704 but, you know, in what aspect, I wasn't sure. 30 00:04:05,997 --> 00:04:08,583 I know that stuff can happen. 31 00:04:08,666 --> 00:04:10,626 You know, and that's what I always say. 32 00:04:10,710 --> 00:04:12,712 "Yeah, yeah." 33 00:04:12,795 --> 00:04:14,422 But stuff can happen. 34 00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:17,550 (HORNS HONKING) 35 00:04:31,022 --> 00:04:34,442 (ENGINE WHIRRING) 36 00:04:34,525 --> 00:04:37,528 (CHATTERING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 37 00:04:46,662 --> 00:04:49,123 (HONKING) 38 00:04:49,207 --> 00:04:52,960 I've been super carsick for about an hour now. 39 00:04:53,044 --> 00:04:56,380 - How you doin', Jimmy? - (GROANING) 40 00:05:05,389 --> 00:05:09,727 We just airmailed a bunch of our stuff off the top of our... truck... 41 00:05:09,811 --> 00:05:12,063 so we're pickin' up the pieces right now. 42 00:05:18,361 --> 00:05:21,823 Meru definitely had a reputation as this impossible climb. 43 00:05:24,325 --> 00:05:28,246 And I also knew, just by the way that Conrad brought the trip up... 44 00:05:28,329 --> 00:05:32,083 it was very nonchalant, so... (CHUCKLES) 45 00:05:32,166 --> 00:05:35,086 I think the more nonchalant Conrad is... 46 00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:39,757 about suggesting a trip, the more worried you oughta be. (LAUGHS) 47 00:05:56,816 --> 00:05:58,317 Oh, yeah. 48 00:05:58,401 --> 00:06:02,363 (SCATTERED CHATTER) 49 00:06:02,446 --> 00:06:03,447 (GROANS) 50 00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:08,452 (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 51 00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:12,206 - (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) - (MAN LAUGHING) 52 00:06:15,209 --> 00:06:20,006 MAN: I was blown away when Jimmy and Conrad approached me about Meru. 53 00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:22,174 They didn't build it up very much. 54 00:06:22,258 --> 00:06:27,221 They didn't say, "This is the mountain that everyone's tried and failed on." 55 00:06:27,305 --> 00:06:31,392 In their minds, I was probably... "Oh, here's some young, fresh blood." 56 00:06:31,475 --> 00:06:34,020 He's gonna be good at... 57 00:06:34,103 --> 00:06:37,148 to get the rope up on certain pitches. 58 00:06:37,231 --> 00:06:40,568 (BELL RINGS) 59 00:06:43,863 --> 00:06:46,616 (JINGLES) 60 00:06:46,699 --> 00:06:50,286 (RINGING CONTINUES) 61 00:07:12,934 --> 00:07:14,435 JIMMY: Namaste. 62 00:07:16,938 --> 00:07:18,439 (JIMMY MURMURS) 63 00:07:18,522 --> 00:07:23,486 (MAN VOCALIZING) 64 00:07:35,706 --> 00:07:37,416 - Woo-hoo! - JIMMY: Woo-hoo! 65 00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:40,544 - Look at this reveal here. Yes! Om, om. - (CHUCKLES) 66 00:07:42,588 --> 00:07:44,048 Whoo. 67 00:07:47,218 --> 00:07:49,387 MAN: The Shark's Fin on Meru central. 68 00:07:51,222 --> 00:07:55,393 This climb has seen more attempts and more failures than any route in the Himalaya. 69 00:07:56,602 --> 00:07:58,938 (CHUCKLES) Wow. 70 00:08:00,731 --> 00:08:02,608 - (MAN CONTINUES) - It's the headwaters of the Ganges River... 71 00:08:02,692 --> 00:08:05,361 one of the most sacred rivers on Earth. 72 00:08:05,444 --> 00:08:08,572 The center of the universe. It's this weird nexus... 73 00:08:08,656 --> 00:08:14,120 that sort of is the point where heaven and Earth and hell all come together. 74 00:08:16,956 --> 00:08:20,292 The thing that gives it the name the Shark's Fin is this 1,500-foot blade... 75 00:08:20,376 --> 00:08:22,878 of this beautiful, flawless granite... 76 00:08:22,962 --> 00:08:25,131 way up high, you know, 20,000 feet. 77 00:08:26,465 --> 00:08:30,553 This is the test of the master climber. 78 00:08:30,636 --> 00:08:34,849 You know, it's been tried by so many great climbers. I don't know, 20 times. 79 00:08:34,932 --> 00:08:38,936 Some of the best climbers in the world have tried and failed on this route. 80 00:08:39,729 --> 00:08:41,564 (SLIDE PROJECTOR CLICKING) 81 00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:43,524 - (KRAKAUER CONTINUES) - Meru is not just hard. 82 00:08:43,607 --> 00:08:46,694 It's hard in this really complicated way. 83 00:08:46,777 --> 00:08:48,362 You can't just be a good ice climber. 84 00:08:48,446 --> 00:08:51,991 You can't just be good at altitude. You can't just be a good rock climber. 85 00:08:52,074 --> 00:08:54,660 You gotta be able to ice climb, mix climb. 86 00:08:54,744 --> 00:08:59,874 And you gotta be able to do big-wall climbing at 20,000 feet. 87 00:08:59,957 --> 00:09:02,460 It's all that stuff wrapped in one package... 88 00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:05,046 that's defeated so many good climbers... 89 00:09:05,129 --> 00:09:09,216 and will probably defeat you and maybe will defeat everybody for all time. 90 00:09:09,300 --> 00:09:11,719 That, to a certain kind of mind-set... 91 00:09:11,802 --> 00:09:13,971 is an irresistible appeal. 92 00:09:30,905 --> 00:09:33,657 RENAN: When we actually got there, and I looked up at the mountain... 93 00:09:33,741 --> 00:09:36,994 I didn't know... what... 94 00:09:37,078 --> 00:09:40,956 what we were getting into, 'cause I'd never seen something that complex before. 95 00:09:43,542 --> 00:09:47,505 CONRAD: Renan's inexperience really didn't give me any reason to pause. 96 00:09:47,588 --> 00:09:50,132 I knew he was strong enough. He knew the systems. 97 00:09:50,216 --> 00:09:54,428 And as a team, you're the sum total of all your experience. 98 00:09:59,058 --> 00:10:02,144 RENAN: I'd been on a number of expeditions with Conrad. 99 00:10:02,228 --> 00:10:04,939 But I hadn't done any serious climbs with him. 100 00:10:05,981 --> 00:10:08,442 And I had never done a climb with Jimmy. 101 00:10:09,652 --> 00:10:11,570 (CARABINERS CLINKING) 102 00:10:12,947 --> 00:10:16,617 I'm so adamant about only going on expeditions... 103 00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:19,620 with people that I know and that I trust. 104 00:10:19,703 --> 00:10:21,789 And there's one exception to that rule... 105 00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:27,169 and that's if somebody that I really, really trust and know well, like Conrad... 106 00:10:27,253 --> 00:10:30,089 says, "This guy's worth bringing up." 107 00:10:33,342 --> 00:10:36,804 CONRAD: I had heard about Renan, and I'd seen him in a climbing film... 108 00:10:36,887 --> 00:10:39,557 where he was, uh, free soloing North Six Shooter. 109 00:10:40,933 --> 00:10:43,394 So I was like, "Okay. Gotta meet Renan." 110 00:10:45,896 --> 00:10:51,652 KRAKAUER: I saw this clip of Renan free soloing Lighting Bolt Cracks. 111 00:10:51,735 --> 00:10:54,029 You see him do that stuff, and it looks out there. 112 00:10:54,113 --> 00:10:58,492 He looks like something's lit a fire under him. 113 00:10:58,576 --> 00:11:02,079 JIMMY: I heard about this kid who's a super-talented climber. 114 00:11:02,163 --> 00:11:05,082 And he was living on the road... 115 00:11:05,166 --> 00:11:07,084 like most climbing bums... 116 00:11:07,168 --> 00:11:10,671 especially climbers that are coming into the scene. 117 00:11:10,754 --> 00:11:12,715 Except for he didn't even have a car. 118 00:11:12,798 --> 00:11:16,427 He was literally just dropped off in the desert. 119 00:11:21,140 --> 00:11:22,641 (PENCIL SCRATCHING) 120 00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:31,066 When I first met Renan, he was mostly creating art in sketchbooks. 121 00:11:31,150 --> 00:11:33,194 Smaller-scale stuff. 122 00:11:33,277 --> 00:11:37,198 And then he started taking big canvases out on expeditions. 123 00:11:37,281 --> 00:11:39,950 'Cause he was- At this point, he was starting to go on more expeditions. 124 00:11:40,034 --> 00:11:45,789 Every opportunity was appreciated, and he was basically going nonstop. 125 00:12:02,014 --> 00:12:03,515 Whew. 126 00:12:04,725 --> 00:12:08,437 5:30 in the evening. Time to start the route. 127 00:12:10,481 --> 00:12:14,318 It's... crisp and cold. 128 00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:16,612 We're waiting for the sun to move away. 129 00:12:16,695 --> 00:12:18,656 So it'll set up and will freeze. 130 00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:21,325 (BLOWS) 131 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:23,369 Uh, this is the best moment- 132 00:12:23,452 --> 00:12:28,832 That... moment where everything comes down, and you're really starting. 133 00:12:28,916 --> 00:12:32,503 Of course, I said that when we left Gangotri and when we left Bozeman. 134 00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:37,007 But... now we're gonna camp on the mountain tonight. 135 00:12:42,346 --> 00:12:45,099 KRAKAUER: Conrad first tried Meru in 2003... 136 00:12:45,182 --> 00:12:47,059 and got his ass kicked. 137 00:12:47,142 --> 00:12:50,396 It was super-technical climbing. This isn't Everest. 138 00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:52,773 This is a whole different kind of climbing. 139 00:12:52,856 --> 00:12:55,776 'Cause on Everest, you can hire Sherpas to carry all your stuff... 140 00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:58,320 to fix the ropes for you, to take most of the risks. 141 00:12:58,404 --> 00:13:00,948 Jimmy and Conrad have climbed Everest four or five times. 142 00:13:01,031 --> 00:13:02,950 Jimmy's even skied off the top. 143 00:13:03,033 --> 00:13:05,119 But Meru is the anti-Everest. 144 00:13:05,202 --> 00:13:07,037 No one's gonna carry your stuff. 145 00:13:07,121 --> 00:13:09,707 If you need it, you need to carry it on your back. 146 00:13:09,790 --> 00:13:12,418 And for Meru, you need a lot of tools to do the job. 147 00:13:12,501 --> 00:13:15,212 Because the climbing covers the whole spectrum. 148 00:13:16,380 --> 00:13:19,967 This upper 1,500 feet, the Shark's Fin, is smooth. 149 00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:22,845 It's clean. It's nearly featureless. 150 00:13:22,928 --> 00:13:27,599 But below that is 4,000 feet of really gnarly climbing- this fluted snow. 151 00:13:27,683 --> 00:13:29,184 Dangerous, exposed. 152 00:13:30,936 --> 00:13:35,065 So, time after time, guys would do that first 4,000 feet, light and fast... 153 00:13:35,149 --> 00:13:36,859 thinkin' they're really studs. 154 00:13:36,942 --> 00:13:39,320 And then they get to the Fin, and it's a big wall. 155 00:13:39,403 --> 00:13:42,197 And you gotta use big wall techniques on the upper part of Meru. 156 00:13:42,281 --> 00:13:44,658 And you gotta go slow for that kind of climbing. 157 00:13:44,742 --> 00:13:47,244 Maybe you'll only do 200 feet in a day. 158 00:13:47,328 --> 00:13:50,539 Maybe it's gonna take you six or seven days to do that top 1,500 feet. 159 00:13:50,622 --> 00:13:53,862 And if it's gonna take you that long, if you're going slow, you need a portaledge. 160 00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:56,378 You need food and water and fuel. 161 00:13:56,462 --> 00:13:59,006 Pretty soon, that's, like, 200 pounds of stuff. 162 00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:01,842 You need a big wall rack, 50 pounds of iron. 163 00:14:01,925 --> 00:14:06,347 So you gotta get that 200 pounds of crap up the first 4,000 feet. 164 00:14:06,430 --> 00:14:08,140 And none of the previous climbers- 165 00:14:08,223 --> 00:14:10,642 and Conrad, his first time- they couldn't believe that. 166 00:14:10,726 --> 00:14:13,645 - They're not gonna climb that way. - (GROANS) 167 00:14:13,729 --> 00:14:17,524 Humpin' loads. Feel the altitude a bit. 168 00:14:17,608 --> 00:14:20,027 KRAKUER: But Conrad after that first time said, "Huh." 169 00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:22,571 Here's the deal. I see this, this epiphany. 170 00:14:22,654 --> 00:14:25,949 You gotta do this big wall style and get your stuff up there. 171 00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:28,452 (THUMPING FOOTSTEPS ON SNOW) 172 00:14:42,299 --> 00:14:43,425 - (METAL CLINKING) - (MURMURS) 173 00:14:43,509 --> 00:14:45,761 - JIMMY: Man, how's it going? - It's goin'... 174 00:14:47,304 --> 00:14:51,767 Nighttime ops. Out climbing. Luckily, the screws are solid. 175 00:14:54,436 --> 00:14:56,647 Now, why do we do this stuff? 176 00:14:57,981 --> 00:15:00,776 The view. The view. 177 00:15:08,117 --> 00:15:11,912 I think it's 2:00 in the morning. We went for the ghetto bivy... 178 00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:14,206 on the shoulder instead of setting up the ledge. 179 00:15:14,289 --> 00:15:18,085 It's a lot easier. We got some Korean- 180 00:15:18,168 --> 00:15:23,048 JIMMY: Tell us the reason why- the real reason why we didn't set up anything. 181 00:15:23,132 --> 00:15:26,635 - (BOTH CHUCKLES) - 'Cause we're worked a little bit maybe. 182 00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:32,808 Could be worse. The sky could be, like, unloading on us right now. 183 00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:37,187 Look what's happening over here. 184 00:15:38,522 --> 00:15:41,483 That's Conrad lying in the snow. 185 00:15:42,776 --> 00:15:45,821 And here's my really pathetic bivy. 186 00:15:45,904 --> 00:15:48,866 (SHIVERING) Oh, grim. 187 00:15:48,949 --> 00:15:52,744 You know it's grim when you're... Yeah. 188 00:15:52,828 --> 00:15:55,622 - When you bivy directly on the snow. - JIMMY: Yeah. 189 00:15:55,706 --> 00:15:58,459 And it's snowing out a little bit too. 190 00:15:58,542 --> 00:16:01,795 (JIMMY CHUCKLES) 191 00:16:05,799 --> 00:16:11,054 (VOCALIZING) 192 00:16:16,477 --> 00:16:17,728 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 193 00:16:32,993 --> 00:16:35,996 (SIGHS) Very first light. 194 00:16:37,331 --> 00:16:40,083 Goin' since... 2:00-ish. 195 00:16:41,251 --> 00:16:42,251 (SIGHS) 196 00:16:42,294 --> 00:16:45,088 (WIND WHOOSHING) 197 00:16:46,924 --> 00:16:51,595 Pretty much made a bunch of mistakes already today. 198 00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:53,180 Takin' me to school... 199 00:16:53,263 --> 00:16:55,015 Yet again. 200 00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:57,976 But, we're makin' good progress... 201 00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:01,188 haulin' 200-pound loads... 202 00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:04,066 up a 3,000-foot snow filter... 203 00:17:05,108 --> 00:17:06,944 at 16,000 feet. 204 00:17:07,528 --> 00:17:09,029 (SIGHS) 205 00:17:16,328 --> 00:17:18,956 See that system comin' in here pretty soon. 206 00:17:22,292 --> 00:17:25,087 JIMMY: Conrad and I have been through some tough expeditions together... 207 00:17:25,170 --> 00:17:27,130 all around the world. 208 00:17:28,298 --> 00:17:31,176 We were on K7 in Pakistan. 209 00:17:31,260 --> 00:17:34,638 We skied Denali, and we've been on Everest together. 210 00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:35,722 (SHUTTER CLICKS) 211 00:17:35,806 --> 00:17:39,017 Conrad's reputation among climbers is flawless. 212 00:17:41,270 --> 00:17:44,648 The irony is he became world famous for finding Mallory's body... 213 00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:46,275 during an Everest climb... 214 00:17:46,358 --> 00:17:49,403 instead of for his difficult first ascents around the world. 215 00:17:53,365 --> 00:17:57,160 Most of my generation of climbers grew up following his expeditions. 216 00:17:59,329 --> 00:18:03,250 Back then I'd never imagined I'd actually get to climb with him. 217 00:18:03,333 --> 00:18:07,337 So it's hard to believe this will be almost seven years as climbing partners. 218 00:18:10,424 --> 00:18:14,177 - (CHUCKLES) - JIMMY: It got a little snowy. 219 00:18:14,845 --> 00:18:16,346 CONRAD: Yup. 220 00:18:16,430 --> 00:18:19,975 - But we're committed to going up. - Yeah. 221 00:18:20,058 --> 00:18:22,477 It's only gonna be snowy for a little bit. Then it's gonna be nice. 222 00:18:22,561 --> 00:18:24,396 Right? (CHUCKLES) 223 00:18:24,479 --> 00:18:27,190 Meanwhile we look out into inside of a Ping-Pong ball. 224 00:18:27,274 --> 00:18:30,319 (SNOW LANDING) 225 00:18:30,402 --> 00:18:33,989 (WIND WHOOSHING) 226 00:18:36,908 --> 00:18:38,410 JIMMY'S VOICE: A storm came... 227 00:18:38,493 --> 00:18:41,288 and we fought to build our hanging portaledge camp. 228 00:18:41,371 --> 00:18:42,623 JIMMY: Whoo! Nice work! 229 00:18:42,706 --> 00:18:46,793 JIMMY'S VOICE: Which is basically a hanging cot with a tent over it. 230 00:18:48,629 --> 00:18:53,884 - (WIND WHOOSHING) - (TENT FLAPPING) 231 00:18:53,967 --> 00:18:57,804 - Holy Jesus. - Okay, good. 232 00:18:59,348 --> 00:19:00,849 Ooh. 233 00:19:01,350 --> 00:19:03,894 (RUMBLING) 234 00:19:09,107 --> 00:19:12,361 JIMMY'S VOICE: Then we start hearing the avalanches coming off on the side... 235 00:19:13,070 --> 00:19:15,072 ripping out next to you. 236 00:19:20,661 --> 00:19:22,663 (SNOW RUMBLING) 237 00:19:22,746 --> 00:19:26,500 (CHUCKLING, SIGHS) 238 00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:29,378 (HISSING) 239 00:19:30,337 --> 00:19:31,505 RENAN: Whoa. 240 00:19:39,137 --> 00:19:41,390 (HISSING) 241 00:19:42,432 --> 00:19:44,434 - (ZIPS) - (WIND WHISTLING) 242 00:19:44,518 --> 00:19:47,312 JIMMY: Look, it's snowing outside. 243 00:19:47,396 --> 00:19:50,357 (WIND WHOOSHING) 244 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:53,360 CONRAD: Living in a portaledge, and it's snowing. 245 00:19:53,443 --> 00:19:56,905 - I kind of feel like Christmas somehow. - (JIMMY CHUCKLES) 246 00:19:56,988 --> 00:19:59,950 CONRAD: This is what we want for Christmas- a snowstorm and... 247 00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:03,161 - to sit here in the- - JIMMY: On the Shark's Fin? 248 00:20:03,245 --> 00:20:08,208 - CONRAD: Yeah. - JIMMY: All soaking wet. Awesome. 249 00:20:14,131 --> 00:20:15,924 (WIND BLOWING) 250 00:20:16,007 --> 00:20:19,720 JIMMY: And so, we're there for a day. Then we're there for two days. 251 00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:21,555 Then we're there for three days. 252 00:20:21,638 --> 00:20:26,059 And basically, we're stuck on the portaledge for four days. 253 00:20:27,644 --> 00:20:30,397 RENAN: It was... one of the biggest storms I'd ever seen. 254 00:20:30,480 --> 00:20:33,066 It was four days in the storm... 255 00:20:33,150 --> 00:20:36,862 and we had only seven days of food total. 256 00:20:36,945 --> 00:20:42,117 So, we ended up, you know, depleting a lot of our food supply. 257 00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:46,663 We had essentially lost half our food. 258 00:20:46,747 --> 00:20:50,083 And 90% of the mountain was still above us. 259 00:20:56,131 --> 00:20:59,760 It's Samsara- the bivy of suffering. 260 00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:04,639 RENAN'S VOICE: I thought, "Okay, it's over. 261 00:21:04,723 --> 00:21:08,101 We've had a good run at it." 262 00:21:08,185 --> 00:21:11,897 Cold. Where's the sun we had the last couple days? 263 00:21:11,980 --> 00:21:13,648 We're up here freezing. 264 00:21:14,858 --> 00:21:16,651 RENAN'S VOICE: This is too much for me. 265 00:21:16,735 --> 00:21:20,781 I'm in over my head. And I'm glad to have the experience... 266 00:21:20,864 --> 00:21:23,492 but I'm also glad that we're going down tomorrow. 267 00:21:31,792 --> 00:21:33,668 JIMMY: The storm clears finally. 268 00:21:33,752 --> 00:21:37,964 And you know, in my head, I'm like, "Okay, you know... 269 00:21:38,048 --> 00:21:40,884 now it's time to move. Storm's over." 270 00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:49,184 So when we started gearing up that day and getting ready to climb... 271 00:21:49,267 --> 00:21:53,313 you know, there was some confusion, I think, for Renan, that we were going- 272 00:21:53,396 --> 00:21:56,733 uh, you know, that we were going up as opposed to down. 273 00:21:56,817 --> 00:21:59,736 - (RENAN, INDISTINCT) - Okay. 274 00:22:00,737 --> 00:22:02,322 (MURMURING) 275 00:22:03,865 --> 00:22:07,118 RENAN: They just started racking up to continue up the mountain. 276 00:22:07,202 --> 00:22:11,206 I didn't know why or how- what they were thinking. 277 00:22:11,289 --> 00:22:12,874 And especially Conrad. 278 00:22:12,958 --> 00:22:17,420 I'd never seen him so... motivated... about a climb. 279 00:22:34,521 --> 00:22:36,731 CONRAD: Climbing's a really dangerous sport. 280 00:22:36,815 --> 00:22:41,361 And a good partner will push you to the summit... 281 00:22:41,444 --> 00:22:46,283 but at the same time, keep you aware of the risks that are involved with it. 282 00:22:55,166 --> 00:22:58,044 RENAN: Belaying out of the portaledge... 283 00:22:59,796 --> 00:23:03,592 CONRAD: That 100% trust in your partner is pretty special. 284 00:23:05,552 --> 00:23:07,053 I think Renan was shocked... 285 00:23:07,137 --> 00:23:09,723 because he hadn't ever really had anything at that extent. 286 00:23:09,806 --> 00:23:12,809 And Jimmy and I, we'd been through that. 287 00:23:16,146 --> 00:23:21,234 We're pushing on through it, and it's that understanding of "It's not that bad." 288 00:23:21,318 --> 00:23:22,986 And that's where a mentor comes in. 289 00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:31,244 Climbing is this weird craft, you know, passed down from generation to generation. 290 00:23:31,328 --> 00:23:33,580 The way you learn is you have a mentor. 291 00:23:34,623 --> 00:23:38,793 Conrad learned at the feet of Mugs Stump. 292 00:23:38,877 --> 00:23:42,839 Conrad was this young phenom, and Mugs was one of the great climbers in the world. 293 00:23:42,923 --> 00:23:45,800 CONRAD: Mugs was great. He took me under his wing. 294 00:23:45,884 --> 00:23:48,345 He was the sensei, and I was the grasshopper. 295 00:23:48,428 --> 00:23:50,472 He pushed me. 296 00:23:50,555 --> 00:23:55,268 He had taken what was unshapen and given shape to it. 297 00:23:55,352 --> 00:24:00,148 Still, to this day, a very important part of my life. 298 00:24:01,733 --> 00:24:04,778 KRAKAUER: So Conrad, he'd found the perfect mentor. 299 00:24:04,861 --> 00:24:08,073 And Mugs would take him into his van and lift the prayer flag... 300 00:24:08,156 --> 00:24:11,451 and there's his special goal, which is this peak called Meru. 301 00:24:11,534 --> 00:24:13,203 And Conrad was like, "Ooh." 302 00:24:14,496 --> 00:24:17,874 And Mugs tried it twice- I think in '86 and '88. 303 00:24:17,958 --> 00:24:20,669 Failed both times, for all kinds of reasons. 304 00:24:20,752 --> 00:24:25,131 But to Mugs, this didn't deter him. This was- He is the cosmic climber... 305 00:24:25,215 --> 00:24:28,301 and this is all part of the cosmic plan, and he was gonna go back. 306 00:24:28,385 --> 00:24:32,305 And I'm sure Conrad- That made a huge impression on him. 307 00:24:32,389 --> 00:24:36,559 So then, 1992, two years after I met Conrad... 308 00:24:36,643 --> 00:24:39,980 uh, Mugs died on Denali, guiding a bootleg client. 309 00:24:40,063 --> 00:24:42,774 (WIND BLOWING) 310 00:24:42,857 --> 00:24:45,819 CONRAD: I was working in Salt Lake and went climbing. 311 00:24:45,902 --> 00:24:47,612 And, uh, we were driving back. 312 00:24:47,696 --> 00:24:52,283 And my friend Doug said, "Hey, we think Mugs has died." 313 00:24:53,868 --> 00:24:59,290 I remember exactly on the interstate where Doug had that conversation. 314 00:24:59,374 --> 00:25:01,835 I was like, "Oh, fuck!" 315 00:25:01,918 --> 00:25:04,379 Because I always thought that shit like that's gonna happen. 316 00:25:04,462 --> 00:25:07,590 But it's not gonna happen to Mugs. He was the best. 317 00:25:27,610 --> 00:25:31,114 RENAN: Climbing with your mentor is a dangerous thing sometimes... 318 00:25:31,197 --> 00:25:33,742 because you give them all of your trust. 319 00:25:33,825 --> 00:25:37,704 I gave them everything, and... 320 00:25:37,787 --> 00:25:42,417 there was a constant battle in my mind every day. 321 00:25:50,216 --> 00:25:53,887 I'd be freezing, shivering uncontrollably... 322 00:25:55,221 --> 00:25:58,558 But I definitely didn't want to be the guy that said... 323 00:25:58,641 --> 00:26:01,061 "Oh, I'm cold. I want to go down." 324 00:26:02,645 --> 00:26:04,647 RENAN: Loose, eh? 325 00:26:04,731 --> 00:26:09,152 RENAN'S VOICE: It must have been negative 20 when the sun went around the corner. 326 00:26:10,653 --> 00:26:14,574 It's debilitating trying to climb in those kind of temperatures. 327 00:26:17,243 --> 00:26:19,954 RENAN: It's all about climbing the cracks. 328 00:26:21,831 --> 00:26:24,584 I don't see any here. (CHUCKLES) 329 00:26:26,252 --> 00:26:29,172 RENAN'S VOICE: We'd hit these totally blank sections of rock. 330 00:26:29,255 --> 00:26:32,383 And I was sure there wasn't anywhere else to go. 331 00:26:35,512 --> 00:26:39,974 But then Jimmy or Conrad would launch into the void. 332 00:26:48,358 --> 00:26:52,112 KRAKAUER: You know, this is steep, modern A4 E-climbing. 333 00:26:52,195 --> 00:26:54,447 It's using tools. You're a craftsman... 334 00:26:54,531 --> 00:26:56,741 tapping and pounding and tweaking. 335 00:26:56,825 --> 00:26:58,868 And he's like this cabinetmaker... 336 00:26:58,952 --> 00:27:02,288 chiseling away at this cabinet out of walnut or something. 337 00:27:02,372 --> 00:27:06,626 Except, you know, if you hit that chisel one more time and you're a cabinetmaker... 338 00:27:06,709 --> 00:27:09,629 maybe you split it and you ruin this cabinet- bummer. 339 00:27:09,712 --> 00:27:13,716 If on an A4 pitch, you, like, split the cabinet, you die. 340 00:27:37,949 --> 00:27:40,076 Yeah, I'll tent right there. 341 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:42,078 Uh, you wanna be here? Where you wanna be? 342 00:27:42,162 --> 00:27:45,081 I don't care. I'm right on this edge. I'll sit here for now. 343 00:27:45,165 --> 00:27:47,458 I got some hot bevies. 344 00:27:47,542 --> 00:27:51,796 JIMMY'S VOICE: It's hard to overstate what kind of condition we were in. 345 00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:54,674 Barely. (SIGHS) 346 00:27:54,757 --> 00:28:00,013 We're literally down to eating a couple spoonfuls of granola in the morning... 347 00:28:00,096 --> 00:28:03,349 and sharing a couple slices of salami during the day... 348 00:28:03,433 --> 00:28:04,934 with couple pieces of cheese. 349 00:28:05,018 --> 00:28:09,063 I mean, we're definitely on pretty limited rations at this point. 350 00:28:10,732 --> 00:28:12,650 - CONRAD: Roasty. - (RENAN CHUCKLES) 351 00:28:13,985 --> 00:28:18,698 For climbers over a stove on a half-empty jug of propane... 352 00:28:18,781 --> 00:28:20,825 there's nothing finer than roasting the rind. 353 00:28:20,909 --> 00:28:23,494 It becomes quite tasty. 354 00:28:24,996 --> 00:28:28,958 JIMMY: 'Cause basically eating everything that you have left. 355 00:28:29,042 --> 00:28:31,211 Super efficient. 356 00:28:31,294 --> 00:28:35,965 Next week, we'll be eating our boots. (CHUCKLES) 357 00:28:40,470 --> 00:28:42,639 (METAL CLINKING) 358 00:28:50,146 --> 00:28:55,401 KRAKAUER: You know, Conrad talks a lot about how to keep the risk manageable. 359 00:28:55,485 --> 00:28:59,239 Talks about there's acceptable risk and unacceptable risk. 360 00:28:59,322 --> 00:29:03,284 But he always keeps it on the acceptable side by leaving this margin. 361 00:29:04,244 --> 00:29:05,745 Om, shanti. 362 00:29:05,828 --> 00:29:09,832 - (KRAKAUER CONTINUES) - But... you know, he had tried this climb before... 363 00:29:09,916 --> 00:29:13,503 failed, and even if he didn't admit it to himself... 364 00:29:13,586 --> 00:29:18,341 to succeed, he was gonna have to throw that conservative stuff out the window... 365 00:29:18,424 --> 00:29:20,760 and take mega-risk on this. 366 00:29:24,764 --> 00:29:27,267 But, you know, if they want to stay alive... 367 00:29:27,350 --> 00:29:29,602 they cannot fuck up at all. 368 00:29:29,686 --> 00:29:33,856 And he talked about, "If I die, I've really let down my family. 369 00:29:33,940 --> 00:29:36,192 I cannot make any mistakes." 370 00:29:36,276 --> 00:29:38,611 That's not good to be thinkin' when you're that far out there. 371 00:29:38,695 --> 00:29:42,365 He is thinkin', "Man, I cannot die now... 372 00:29:42,448 --> 00:29:44,701 because then I've blown it for my wife and kids." 373 00:29:46,911 --> 00:29:48,830 Jenni has no idea. 374 00:29:48,913 --> 00:29:52,542 She has no fucking idea what he is really doin' out there. 375 00:29:53,334 --> 00:29:56,212 (SIGHS) 376 00:30:01,676 --> 00:30:04,053 (JIMMY SIGHS) 377 00:30:04,137 --> 00:30:06,014 Fuck. 378 00:30:06,097 --> 00:30:08,975 We're all just kind of frayed. 379 00:30:09,058 --> 00:30:13,730 Sixteen days up here, just givin' it everything we have. 380 00:30:14,731 --> 00:30:16,691 It's been really slow. 381 00:30:17,775 --> 00:30:20,820 And, uh, we're running out of fuel actually. 382 00:30:21,904 --> 00:30:24,782 Um, and food. And cigarettes and papers. 383 00:30:24,866 --> 00:30:28,661 But tomorrow is kind of the decider. 384 00:30:28,745 --> 00:30:31,581 If we, uh... 385 00:30:31,664 --> 00:30:34,751 don't get up and around this big, steep headwall... 386 00:30:36,919 --> 00:30:39,213 we're gonna have to pull the cord, but, uh... 387 00:30:39,297 --> 00:30:42,759 we got one last push tomorrow. 388 00:30:45,428 --> 00:30:47,388 (CHUCKLES) 389 00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:54,020 Jimmy's strength is that he's very rational and accepting... 390 00:30:54,103 --> 00:30:56,272 and real in what we can do. 391 00:30:57,440 --> 00:31:00,360 When we first met, I realized right away... 392 00:31:00,443 --> 00:31:03,363 there was a mentorship that was going to blossom. 393 00:31:03,446 --> 00:31:08,868 I also immediately sensed that he was driven and determined. 394 00:31:08,951 --> 00:31:12,246 - And I never really knew why. - (SHUTTER CLICKING) 395 00:31:12,914 --> 00:31:14,457 (SHUTTER CLICKS) 396 00:31:14,540 --> 00:31:17,210 My parents called me Xiao-pang. 397 00:31:17,293 --> 00:31:19,253 It means "Little Chub." 398 00:31:19,337 --> 00:31:24,175 JIMMY'S VOICE: My parents had to escape from China during the Communist Revolution. 399 00:31:24,258 --> 00:31:25,968 They both went through a lot. 400 00:31:27,428 --> 00:31:30,390 They came to the United States to make a new life. 401 00:31:30,473 --> 00:31:34,060 And I think they had really high expectations for me. 402 00:31:34,727 --> 00:31:37,939 My dad was a hard-ass. 403 00:31:38,022 --> 00:31:41,275 In the wintertime, we would get cords of wood to heat the house. 404 00:31:41,359 --> 00:31:44,278 And he'd put it in the back of this huge yard we had... 405 00:31:44,362 --> 00:31:48,116 and make me drag it back on a sled in thigh-deep snow. 406 00:31:50,159 --> 00:31:52,286 He was really about being tough. 407 00:31:53,913 --> 00:31:56,666 Mountain climbing, it wasn't a career to them. 408 00:31:56,749 --> 00:31:59,252 My mom used to call me all the time... 409 00:31:59,335 --> 00:32:03,047 and lament about the fact her son was this homeless man... 410 00:32:03,131 --> 00:32:07,093 who wandered around and camped and didn't have a home. 411 00:32:07,176 --> 00:32:09,345 (SIZZLING) 412 00:32:09,429 --> 00:32:12,140 But when I went through a difficult divorce... 413 00:32:12,223 --> 00:32:15,726 and called Jimmy, crying, upset... 414 00:32:15,810 --> 00:32:19,772 his first words were, "Come stay with me." 415 00:32:19,856 --> 00:32:23,734 So, we just moved into his bachelor pad. 416 00:32:23,818 --> 00:32:26,737 Two kids, all their markers and Legos. (CHUCKLES) 417 00:32:26,821 --> 00:32:27,821 Yeah. 418 00:32:27,864 --> 00:32:29,532 And he just took us right in. 419 00:32:33,202 --> 00:32:36,956 KRAKAUER: You know, he's another one of these extremely accomplished climbers. 420 00:32:37,039 --> 00:32:38,499 You don't appreciate how good a climber he is... 421 00:32:38,583 --> 00:32:40,751 because you get distracted by the art... 422 00:32:40,835 --> 00:32:43,463 which is probably the way he likes it. 423 00:32:43,546 --> 00:32:47,175 And taking pictures makes the climbing Way harder. 424 00:32:47,258 --> 00:32:50,887 He was filming this Everest expedition, and his morn got really sick. 425 00:32:50,970 --> 00:32:55,308 And he found out about it and had to leave so he could see her before she died. 426 00:32:59,020 --> 00:33:03,065 JIMMY: My mom had made me promise fairly early on, she was like... 427 00:33:03,149 --> 00:33:06,986 "If you're gonna make this your life, you need to promise me one thing. 428 00:33:07,069 --> 00:33:11,240 You have to promise me that you will not die before me." 429 00:33:11,324 --> 00:33:14,327 And when I was on climbs and on expeditions... 430 00:33:14,410 --> 00:33:18,164 I would get to a certain point, and I would say, "Okay. 431 00:33:18,247 --> 00:33:22,335 How close am I willing to go to potentially break that promise?" 432 00:33:22,418 --> 00:33:25,755 So, after my mom died... 433 00:33:25,838 --> 00:33:28,841 when the climbing started to get into that place... 434 00:33:28,925 --> 00:33:34,180 I remember a moment being like, "Well, I can go for it right now." 435 00:33:35,097 --> 00:33:37,058 (EQUIPMENT JINGLING) 436 00:33:43,314 --> 00:33:46,234 RENAN: Conrad's up there. Can't find good gear. 437 00:33:47,276 --> 00:33:51,364 Our hands and feet are all frost-numb. 438 00:33:51,447 --> 00:33:52,990 Nice, Rad. 439 00:33:53,658 --> 00:33:55,493 Good move. 440 00:33:55,576 --> 00:33:56,869 (HAMMERING) 441 00:33:56,953 --> 00:34:00,248 We're probably at about 20,500 feet. 442 00:34:00,331 --> 00:34:02,291 Just short of the ridge. 443 00:34:03,167 --> 00:34:05,294 It's fucking Arctic. 444 00:34:07,088 --> 00:34:09,257 Today's our summit bid. 445 00:34:17,557 --> 00:34:19,100 RENAN: Bring it in. 446 00:34:20,434 --> 00:34:23,229 - CONRAD: Whoo! - RENAN: Yeah, Rad! 447 00:34:23,312 --> 00:34:26,691 (PEBBLE RATTLES) 448 00:34:26,774 --> 00:34:28,568 Nice! 449 00:34:28,651 --> 00:34:31,862 KRAKAUER: The game in climbing is cut that line as fine as you can. 450 00:34:31,946 --> 00:34:34,323 But you don't want to take stupid risk. 451 00:34:34,407 --> 00:34:37,618 If you die taking a stupid risk, not only are you dead... 452 00:34:37,702 --> 00:34:40,413 but you've embarrassed yourself and you've disgraced yourself. 453 00:34:40,496 --> 00:34:42,623 You're not supposed to take risk lightly. 454 00:34:42,707 --> 00:34:45,835 You're supposed to show that you're so good and so controlled... 455 00:34:45,918 --> 00:34:48,504 you can take it right to that line and go no further. 456 00:34:48,588 --> 00:34:50,089 (CHUCKLES) 457 00:34:51,674 --> 00:34:55,261 JIMMY: It's been a super long morning. Started at 2:00. 458 00:34:55,344 --> 00:34:58,014 Probably another 500 feet to the summit. 459 00:34:59,974 --> 00:35:02,268 JIMMY'S VOICE: We're gunning for the summit ridgeline... 460 00:35:02,351 --> 00:35:07,315 and Conrad's burrowing through this overhanging cornice. 461 00:35:07,398 --> 00:35:10,776 Renan is in the line of fire. 462 00:35:10,860 --> 00:35:13,946 Snow and ice falling 150 feet... 463 00:35:14,030 --> 00:35:16,449 just slamming Renan. 464 00:35:16,532 --> 00:35:19,785 RENAN: All the shrapnel and the ice that he was kicking down... 465 00:35:19,869 --> 00:35:21,996 was going directly onto me- 466 00:35:22,079 --> 00:35:23,623 like, constant deluge. 467 00:35:23,706 --> 00:35:28,127 And I could really feel that I was losing my fingers and toes. 468 00:35:28,210 --> 00:35:33,341 I started just screaming... and yelling and crying. 469 00:35:33,424 --> 00:35:36,052 That was my absolute last breaking point. 470 00:35:36,135 --> 00:35:39,972 I even said something when I got up there, like, "My feet aren't doing so well." 471 00:35:40,056 --> 00:35:43,184 They didn't even acknowledge what I said. 472 00:35:43,267 --> 00:35:47,229 They were talking about spending the night there. 473 00:35:49,482 --> 00:35:51,602 JIMMY: Conrad and I are having a conversation like... 474 00:35:51,651 --> 00:35:55,154 "Is there a spot to bivy? Is there a spot for us to spend the night?" 475 00:35:55,237 --> 00:36:00,868 Trying to sleep perched on this tiny little corner... 476 00:36:00,951 --> 00:36:03,788 at 20,000 feet without sleeping bags... 477 00:36:03,871 --> 00:36:07,083 and risk fingers and toes. 478 00:36:10,461 --> 00:36:12,922 JIMMY: What if we push on? Should we push on? 479 00:36:13,005 --> 00:36:16,008 If you go for it and you spend the night out... 480 00:36:16,092 --> 00:36:20,179 there's a probability that's higher than you want... 481 00:36:20,262 --> 00:36:23,015 that you... aren't gonna come back. 482 00:36:25,267 --> 00:36:28,979 Just shy of the summit. 483 00:36:29,063 --> 00:36:32,692 It's 4:00, and we're at 17 days. 484 00:36:32,775 --> 00:36:36,445 - We're fuckin' roasted. - Started out this morning at midnight. 485 00:36:36,529 --> 00:36:40,491 If we go today and attempt to the summit, that means we're gonna be out tonight... 486 00:36:40,574 --> 00:36:46,205 and an unplanned bivouac at 20,000 feet in really cold climate... 487 00:36:46,288 --> 00:36:49,959 without proper protection and without sufficient food... 488 00:36:50,042 --> 00:36:51,794 just doesn't make any sense. 489 00:36:56,298 --> 00:36:58,300 (EXHALES) 490 00:37:06,934 --> 00:37:09,228 (GRUNTS) 491 00:37:09,311 --> 00:37:11,105 RENAN: It's over. 492 00:37:11,188 --> 00:37:13,941 A hundred meters short of the summit. 493 00:37:14,024 --> 00:37:16,777 We just don't have the safety margin to make it. 494 00:37:19,655 --> 00:37:23,617 It's not easy turning around. But- 495 00:37:23,701 --> 00:37:25,995 Fuck, this thing was an ass-kicker. 496 00:37:26,078 --> 00:37:28,497 Maybe it just wasn't meant to be climbed. 497 00:37:30,583 --> 00:37:33,544 But I'm not coming back. 498 00:37:33,627 --> 00:37:34,920 (EXHALES) 499 00:37:35,004 --> 00:37:39,008 I mean, that's just so... (EXHALES) 500 00:37:39,091 --> 00:37:41,761 JIMMY: Fitting? 501 00:37:41,844 --> 00:37:45,848 - The center of the universe is... - Unattainable. 502 00:37:48,017 --> 00:37:52,021 (MAN VOCALIZING) 503 00:37:57,276 --> 00:37:59,570 RENAN'S VOICE: When we finally made the decision to go down... 504 00:37:59,653 --> 00:38:01,280 it was a relief. 505 00:38:01,363 --> 00:38:04,450 Uh, it was also heartbreaking. 506 00:38:10,623 --> 00:38:13,793 (VOCALIZING CONTINUES) 507 00:38:13,876 --> 00:38:18,214 Our feet are... hammered and we're just emaciated. 508 00:38:18,297 --> 00:38:20,800 RENAN: When we got down off the mountain... 509 00:38:20,883 --> 00:38:26,138 our condition was this combination of frostbite and trench foot. 510 00:38:26,222 --> 00:38:27,807 Trench foot is what you get... 511 00:38:27,890 --> 00:38:32,061 when your feet and your hands are in this wet, damp condition... 512 00:38:32,144 --> 00:38:34,480 for a long period of time, and they start to rot. 513 00:38:34,563 --> 00:38:39,485 I came back in a wheelchair. I couldn't really walk for a few weeks. 514 00:38:39,568 --> 00:38:43,989 All of us gave it our best. We pushed our limits. 515 00:38:44,073 --> 00:38:46,283 Uh, there was something left undone. 516 00:38:48,244 --> 00:38:51,914 But... I was possessed. 517 00:38:51,997 --> 00:38:53,749 I wasn't even down, and I was like... 518 00:38:53,833 --> 00:38:57,169 "Okay, do I come back in pre-monsoon, post-monsoon? 519 00:38:57,253 --> 00:39:00,756 When are we gonna do it, and what do we gotta do better this time?" 520 00:39:04,760 --> 00:39:07,096 (WIND WHOOSHING) 521 00:39:11,976 --> 00:39:17,106 JIMMY: After 2008, Renan and I ended up on a bunch of different shoots together. 522 00:39:17,189 --> 00:39:20,442 We went all over the world. We were in Chad, Africa. 523 00:39:20,526 --> 00:39:22,653 We were in Borneo. 524 00:39:22,736 --> 00:39:25,614 We worked on a ton of jobs together. 525 00:39:38,085 --> 00:39:42,840 We knew that there were a number of teams who attempted the Shark's Fin after us. 526 00:39:42,923 --> 00:39:47,636 And then this great Slovenian climber named Silvo Karo... 527 00:39:47,720 --> 00:39:51,974 called Conrad to ask for beta- ask for information on the route. 528 00:39:52,057 --> 00:39:56,145 And so we gave him our total support. We weren't being possessive of the climb. 529 00:39:56,228 --> 00:39:59,565 We weren't- it wasn't- We don't own that mountain. 530 00:39:59,648 --> 00:40:04,570 We were like, "Here it is. Here's what we learned." 531 00:40:04,653 --> 00:40:08,616 And, "Finish the story of the Shark's Fin." 532 00:40:08,699 --> 00:40:12,620 Because then we don't have to go back. It's done. 533 00:40:12,703 --> 00:40:15,748 JIMMY: And we kind of assumed Silvo would get it. 534 00:40:15,831 --> 00:40:18,918 And then I got a call from Conrad, you know. 535 00:40:19,001 --> 00:40:22,129 And all he said was, "He didn't get it." 536 00:40:22,212 --> 00:40:26,425 At that point we're like, "Okay." Gears turning. "We're going back." 537 00:40:26,508 --> 00:40:30,679 (CHUCKLES) They say the best Alpinists are the ones with the worst memory. 538 00:40:30,763 --> 00:40:33,140 (BIRDS TWEETING) 539 00:40:38,562 --> 00:40:41,565 JIMMY: About six months before we were supposed to head to Meru... 540 00:40:41,649 --> 00:40:42,775 on our second attempt... 541 00:40:42,858 --> 00:40:47,321 Renan and I were out shooting a commercial project in Jackson Hole. 542 00:40:47,404 --> 00:40:50,699 It's not too steep up here. The summit's probably right here. 543 00:40:50,783 --> 00:40:54,745 JIMMY'S VOICE: I had gotten a call from Jeremy Jones and Xavier de Le Rue... 544 00:40:54,828 --> 00:40:57,665 two of the best big-mountain snowboarders in the world. 545 00:40:57,748 --> 00:40:59,375 In here, is this the steepest part? 546 00:40:59,458 --> 00:41:02,211 JIMMY'S VOICE: It was a big job, and I asked Renan to film on it... 547 00:41:02,294 --> 00:41:04,004 even though he wasn't a great skier. 548 00:41:04,088 --> 00:41:07,800 This line, below this is, like, thousands of cliffs. 549 00:41:19,645 --> 00:41:23,399 I'm stoked. Those are the first turns I've ever made with Jeremy and Xav. 550 00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,735 - Bodes well. - (CHUCKLES) 551 00:41:28,070 --> 00:41:29,738 That was awesome. 552 00:41:36,078 --> 00:41:39,790 JIMMY: We were headed down together when I saw Renan catch an edge. 553 00:41:39,873 --> 00:41:43,377 And he spun out of control and disappeared over a cliff. 554 00:41:45,212 --> 00:41:46,964 Oh. Oh! 555 00:41:52,469 --> 00:41:56,849 I got down to him, and there was blood all around his head. 556 00:41:56,932 --> 00:41:59,852 - (CHATTERING) - MAN: I got it. 557 00:41:59,935 --> 00:42:04,189 He'd smashed his skull, and you could see into his head. 558 00:42:04,273 --> 00:42:07,568 I thought he was gonna die... in my arms. 559 00:42:07,651 --> 00:42:10,696 - (MONITORS BEEPING) - I felt responsible. 560 00:42:10,779 --> 00:42:14,366 MAN: He has an open, depressed skull fracture with pneumocephali... 561 00:42:14,450 --> 00:42:16,285 which is air inside the skull. 562 00:42:16,368 --> 00:42:21,457 And... he has a C2 teardrop fracture and lateral mass fracture... 563 00:42:21,540 --> 00:42:25,044 as well as a C6 spinous process fracture. 564 00:42:32,342 --> 00:42:34,720 (MONITOR BEEPING) 565 00:42:36,388 --> 00:42:38,307 We came out, okay? 566 00:42:40,809 --> 00:42:44,813 (MURMURING) 567 00:42:51,070 --> 00:42:53,989 He's gonna be immobilized for a long time. They're gonna take him to surgery. 568 00:42:54,073 --> 00:42:56,408 Any sort of, like, significant risks during the surgery? 569 00:42:56,492 --> 00:42:57,493 Absolutely. 570 00:43:00,412 --> 00:43:05,167 So they tell us we can see him and they roll him out, and he just looked- 571 00:43:06,335 --> 00:43:08,670 I- I mean, I recognized him, but- 572 00:43:10,005 --> 00:43:12,966 I mean, he looked so beat down. 573 00:43:18,806 --> 00:43:24,269 So when I found you, you were... face down... in a pile. 574 00:43:24,353 --> 00:43:28,190 You essentially had, like, a triangle about that big- 575 00:43:29,900 --> 00:43:33,529 about that big where I could see your skull. 576 00:43:35,948 --> 00:43:40,452 JIMMY'S VOICE: Renan had landed on his head and severely fractured his skull. 577 00:43:40,536 --> 00:43:44,123 He broke two vertebrae in his neck. 578 00:43:44,206 --> 00:43:47,292 He severed one of his vertebral arteries. 579 00:43:47,376 --> 00:43:52,297 And basically cut off half the blood flow to his brain. 580 00:43:52,381 --> 00:43:55,884 I asked, I said, "Well, what are we talkin' about here?" 581 00:43:55,968 --> 00:44:01,890 They were like, "90% of people with any one of these injuries will never walk again." 582 00:44:01,974 --> 00:44:04,768 His head injury- They were saying, you know- 583 00:44:04,852 --> 00:44:09,398 it was within a millimeter of him being a vegetable. 584 00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:14,153 - Here we are... - CONRAD'S VOICE: I got a call from Jimmy. 585 00:44:14,236 --> 00:44:16,738 He said, "There's been a really severe accident." 586 00:44:16,822 --> 00:44:18,323 And I drove down right away. 587 00:44:18,407 --> 00:44:20,200 We had this moment where it was... 588 00:44:20,284 --> 00:44:22,077 "You're gonna be fine. Things are good." 589 00:44:22,161 --> 00:44:24,496 And we got up and we got the walker... 590 00:44:24,580 --> 00:44:28,333 and we walked from east to west on the linoleum floor. 591 00:44:28,417 --> 00:44:30,836 (CHUCKLES) 592 00:44:30,919 --> 00:44:33,547 - Recovery mode. - Yeah. 593 00:44:36,049 --> 00:44:40,846 Let's go somewhere quick, so we can get our job done. 594 00:44:40,929 --> 00:44:41,930 Yep. 595 00:44:42,014 --> 00:44:45,350 - September. - Exactly. 596 00:44:45,434 --> 00:44:48,478 CONRAD'S VOICE: At the time, he was like, "I want to go to Meru." 597 00:44:48,562 --> 00:44:53,025 But I didn't want to be like, "Dude, you're hooped. I mean, come on." 598 00:44:53,108 --> 00:44:57,196 You don't have the heart to tell someone something's impossible. 599 00:44:57,279 --> 00:45:00,032 You're not gonna stuff 'em right at that moment and say... 600 00:45:00,115 --> 00:45:02,367 "Dude, what are you talkin' about? You're never goin' back to Meru. 601 00:45:02,451 --> 00:45:05,370 You're never goin' climbing." You just don't say those kind of things. 602 00:45:05,454 --> 00:45:08,624 (MONITOR BEEPING) 603 00:45:10,209 --> 00:45:14,421 We'll see how it- see how it does at altitude at some point. 604 00:45:16,089 --> 00:45:17,549 (BLOWS RASPBERRY) 605 00:45:17,633 --> 00:45:19,635 (WIND WHOOSHING) 606 00:45:23,055 --> 00:45:25,224 JIMMY: Once I knew Renan was stable... 607 00:45:25,307 --> 00:45:28,727 I headed back to Jackson to try and finish the job. 608 00:45:30,812 --> 00:45:32,981 JEREMY: As far as Jimmy coming back... 609 00:45:33,065 --> 00:45:37,069 no one would have said anything if Jimmy said, "I'm not going to do it." 610 00:45:37,152 --> 00:45:38,612 "Um, I'm done." 611 00:45:38,695 --> 00:45:42,157 Those are real personal decisions. 612 00:45:42,241 --> 00:45:46,745 It was kind of a, "All right, you have to get back on the horse" mentality. 613 00:45:55,087 --> 00:45:58,924 Five, four, three, two, one. 614 00:45:59,007 --> 00:46:02,010 - Xavier de Le Rue. - (BEEPS) 615 00:46:12,771 --> 00:46:14,273 Dropping! 616 00:46:18,235 --> 00:46:20,112 JEREMY: The general mood was pretty light. 617 00:46:20,195 --> 00:46:24,157 Our objective for the day had been reached. Good vibes. 618 00:46:24,241 --> 00:46:26,952 Our conversation before dropping in was... 619 00:46:27,035 --> 00:46:29,788 go one at a time, make sure everyone's in a safe spot. 620 00:46:29,871 --> 00:46:31,623 Dropping! 621 00:46:33,292 --> 00:46:36,503 JIMMY: So, Jeremy made a couple turns. 622 00:46:36,586 --> 00:46:40,465 Cut up on the side of this safe zone. 623 00:46:40,549 --> 00:46:44,219 Called me in, and I make a turn right next to his turn. 624 00:46:44,303 --> 00:46:46,471 And then- And then I feel it- 625 00:46:46,555 --> 00:46:48,849 The whole slope shift. 626 00:46:48,932 --> 00:46:51,935 (RUMBLING) 627 00:46:52,019 --> 00:46:54,688 JEREMY: I yell, "Avalanche." 628 00:46:54,771 --> 00:46:59,151 Just screaming, "Get out, get out, get out." 629 00:46:59,234 --> 00:47:01,528 JIMMY: For a moment, it looks like slow motion. 630 00:47:01,611 --> 00:47:04,573 And the next moment, everything went to fast-forward. 631 00:47:04,656 --> 00:47:07,034 And it just... I got swept. 632 00:47:07,117 --> 00:47:09,286 I'm airborne. 633 00:47:10,412 --> 00:47:12,080 Totally weightless. 634 00:47:14,541 --> 00:47:17,502 And I lost sight of him. That was the last I saw of Jimmy. 635 00:47:17,586 --> 00:47:22,549 And the slide just kept going and going and going and going. 636 00:47:22,632 --> 00:47:25,177 (RUMBLING) 637 00:47:25,260 --> 00:47:29,890 JIMMY: I just got crushed under an ocean of car-sized blocks. 638 00:47:29,973 --> 00:47:33,018 Probably going 70, 80 miles an hour... 639 00:47:33,101 --> 00:47:35,354 down 2,000 vertical feet. 640 00:47:36,772 --> 00:47:39,191 And in my mind, I heard this voice... 641 00:47:39,274 --> 00:47:41,026 having this conversation that was like... 642 00:47:41,109 --> 00:47:44,196 "Wow, I... I always wondered how I was gonna die... 643 00:47:44,279 --> 00:47:45,781 and now- now I know." 644 00:47:52,204 --> 00:47:55,040 I was just expecting to get torn to pieces. 645 00:47:55,123 --> 00:47:57,626 But after a while, it started to slow down. 646 00:47:57,709 --> 00:48:02,923 And this weird undercurrent started pushing me up through the snow. 647 00:48:03,006 --> 00:48:05,967 And at the last moment... 648 00:48:06,051 --> 00:48:08,637 I popped out of the toe of this thing... 649 00:48:09,888 --> 00:48:12,766 buried up to my chest. 650 00:48:12,849 --> 00:48:16,895 I was in that moment being like, "Oh, my God. I'm in one piece." 651 00:48:16,978 --> 00:48:21,483 Like, I coughed up this huge chunk of snow, and I took this huge breath... 652 00:48:21,566 --> 00:48:23,318 and I was like- (GASPING) 653 00:48:23,402 --> 00:48:26,154 And I looked at my arms, and I was like, I mean... 654 00:48:26,238 --> 00:48:28,824 I couldn't even believe they were still connected to my body. 655 00:48:28,907 --> 00:48:30,659 And then, um- 656 00:48:32,911 --> 00:48:34,413 Yeah, it was a lot. 657 00:48:36,331 --> 00:48:40,252 JEREMY: It was really difficult to descend and felt like forever. 658 00:48:40,335 --> 00:48:42,087 But I come around the corner... 659 00:48:42,170 --> 00:48:44,631 and way out at the very bottom... 660 00:48:44,714 --> 00:48:48,176 of the biggest debris fields I've ever seen... 661 00:48:48,260 --> 00:48:51,179 is Jimmy sitting upright. 662 00:48:51,263 --> 00:48:52,764 (EXHALES SHARPLY) 663 00:48:52,848 --> 00:48:56,393 JIMMY: I haven't seen a fuckin' slide- (CHUCKLES) 664 00:49:01,148 --> 00:49:05,777 JEREMY'S VOICE: This avalanche has trumped all avalanches I've ever seen. 665 00:49:05,861 --> 00:49:09,197 I couldn't help but think, "Jimmy's dead." 666 00:49:10,365 --> 00:49:13,910 I just can't believe that he survived it. 667 00:49:13,994 --> 00:49:15,871 Oh, boy! 668 00:49:15,954 --> 00:49:17,664 - (WHINES) - Whoo! 669 00:49:17,747 --> 00:49:19,499 JEREMY: We just saw a miracle. 670 00:49:19,583 --> 00:49:21,543 XAVIER: Yeah, they saw a miracle. 671 00:49:21,626 --> 00:49:24,754 Or I saw superhuman effort. I saw somethin'. I don't know. 672 00:49:31,303 --> 00:49:35,015 JIMMY: Most people don't survive those kinds of avalanches. 673 00:49:35,098 --> 00:49:37,642 People die in a lot lesser avalanches. 674 00:49:37,726 --> 00:49:39,895 So I got really lucky. 675 00:49:39,978 --> 00:49:42,481 Took off for a while. I disappeared off the map... 676 00:49:42,564 --> 00:49:46,067 and I needed some time to really contemplate. 677 00:49:48,445 --> 00:49:51,490 GRACE: After Renan's near-death accident... 678 00:49:51,573 --> 00:49:53,575 Jimmy was extremely shaken. 679 00:49:53,658 --> 00:49:56,244 And then the avalanche four days later. 680 00:49:56,328 --> 00:49:59,915 It really contributed to him reexamining his life. 681 00:49:59,998 --> 00:50:03,084 He'd been given a second chance, and so what do you do with a second chance? 682 00:50:10,342 --> 00:50:13,803 KRAKAUER: So, Jimmy survived this thing that people don't survive... 683 00:50:13,887 --> 00:50:17,224 and he was really messed up. 684 00:50:17,307 --> 00:50:19,267 He was in a bad way psychologically. 685 00:50:19,351 --> 00:50:23,396 And this makes you doubt your judgment about everything. 686 00:50:23,480 --> 00:50:25,482 He bailed from various commitments. 687 00:50:25,565 --> 00:50:28,360 He's not goin' anywhere. He's certainly not goin' to Meru. 688 00:50:28,443 --> 00:50:32,072 Renan can't go to Meru. He's crippled, maybe for life. Seriously. 689 00:50:32,155 --> 00:50:34,783 You know, no one knew if Renan was gonna come out of this. 690 00:50:39,162 --> 00:50:40,664 (EXHALES) 691 00:50:42,290 --> 00:50:45,210 CONRAD: Renan and I got together. He had his neck brace on... 692 00:50:45,293 --> 00:50:47,712 and he was in his La-Z-Boy chair. 693 00:50:47,796 --> 00:50:49,548 And he was kind of like this. 694 00:50:51,758 --> 00:50:54,386 (TYPING) 695 00:50:56,972 --> 00:50:59,224 I'm offering encouragement. I'm like, "Yes, we can do this. 696 00:50:59,307 --> 00:51:01,101 This is- This is good." 697 00:51:01,184 --> 00:51:05,105 Yet, in the back of my mind, I knew that I might have to be- 698 00:51:05,188 --> 00:51:09,985 it might be, "Renan, you're just physically are not prepared to go back to Meru." 699 00:51:13,738 --> 00:51:18,660 JENNI: I think Conrad was the driving force for the entire trip. 700 00:51:18,743 --> 00:51:23,915 At first I didn't want him to go back, but it was just that loyalty to Mugs... 701 00:51:23,999 --> 00:51:27,460 and wanting to fulfill that shared dream. 702 00:51:30,797 --> 00:51:36,136 Having climbed mountains myself, I understood that. 703 00:51:36,219 --> 00:51:40,473 Especially if it's a first ascent. No one's been there before you. 704 00:51:43,476 --> 00:51:48,773 JIMMY: After some time off and- and some serious contemplation... 705 00:51:48,857 --> 00:51:54,446 the idea of not skiing and not climbing and not being in the mountains... 706 00:51:54,529 --> 00:51:59,618 um, was- was too much to- to imagine. 707 00:52:01,453 --> 00:52:03,955 I just wasn't ready to give it all up. 708 00:52:05,624 --> 00:52:06,958 (PANTING) 709 00:52:08,710 --> 00:52:12,380 RENAN: There was only five months until we were supposed to leave for Meru. 710 00:52:12,464 --> 00:52:15,383 It was a pretty serious point in time where... 711 00:52:15,467 --> 00:52:17,177 I didn't care that I was injured. 712 00:52:17,260 --> 00:52:20,805 I just cared that I wasn't going to be able to join the team again. 713 00:52:20,889 --> 00:52:22,849 Can I have you bring your arms up like so? 714 00:52:22,932 --> 00:52:25,685 (RENAN CONTINUES) And I'm sure, to my friends and family, that was really hard... 715 00:52:25,769 --> 00:52:28,563 because they just wanted to see me okay. 716 00:52:28,647 --> 00:52:31,858 I just feel bad to put them through that. 717 00:52:35,278 --> 00:52:37,518 DOCTOR: One of the fractures is this thing back here... 718 00:52:37,572 --> 00:52:41,534 which is so far displaced that that's not gonna really heal. 719 00:52:41,618 --> 00:52:43,286 This is the second fracture. 720 00:52:43,370 --> 00:52:46,915 RENAN: One of the biggest question marks was the vertebral artery. 721 00:52:46,998 --> 00:52:49,584 I'd lost half the blood supply to my brain... 722 00:52:49,668 --> 00:52:53,088 and climbing at altitude, there's a high risk of... 723 00:52:53,171 --> 00:52:56,299 some sort of blood clot getting through that artery... 724 00:52:56,383 --> 00:52:58,843 and giving me a stroke during the climb. 725 00:52:58,927 --> 00:53:01,763 But for me, it was worth the risk. 726 00:53:01,846 --> 00:53:03,848 It was something that I had to do. 727 00:53:03,932 --> 00:53:06,893 It was worth possibly dying for. 728 00:53:09,562 --> 00:53:11,773 I mean, in my mind, I thought it was- 729 00:53:11,856 --> 00:53:14,275 I thought it was crazy that he wanted to go back. 730 00:53:14,359 --> 00:53:19,197 But I realize that Meru for him was something to hold onto. 731 00:53:19,280 --> 00:53:21,783 For him, it was like, "This is my dream." 732 00:53:21,866 --> 00:53:24,786 To come back and climb Meru... 733 00:53:24,869 --> 00:53:30,208 and prove to himself that he had the capacity to make a comeback. 734 00:53:30,291 --> 00:53:32,377 And I- I understood it as well... 735 00:53:32,460 --> 00:53:37,966 because, in a way, I needed the same thing, you know. 736 00:53:42,137 --> 00:53:46,474 (GRUNTING) 737 00:53:46,558 --> 00:53:49,894 - The bike. - (EXHALES SHARPLY) 738 00:53:55,859 --> 00:53:59,904 JIMMY: Renan had put his heart and mind into recovering. 739 00:53:59,988 --> 00:54:04,242 And the way that he had progressed was... 740 00:54:04,325 --> 00:54:07,454 almost inhuman. 741 00:54:07,537 --> 00:54:10,331 (PANTING) 742 00:54:14,502 --> 00:54:17,005 Conrad and I were gonna go back to Meru. 743 00:54:17,088 --> 00:54:20,175 But we still had to make a decision about Renan. 744 00:54:20,258 --> 00:54:24,345 And Renan was... pretty adamant about going. 745 00:54:25,597 --> 00:54:29,642 It was this moment when the three of us got together... 746 00:54:29,726 --> 00:54:31,978 and Jimmy made the case for Renan to come along. 747 00:54:33,229 --> 00:54:35,982 JENNI: I was against Renan going on the climb. 748 00:54:36,065 --> 00:54:38,401 I just confronted Jimmy and I said, "You know... 749 00:54:38,485 --> 00:54:41,446 I am not keen about this. 750 00:54:41,529 --> 00:54:43,865 You know, you can't take Renan up there. 751 00:54:43,948 --> 00:54:46,451 I mean, what if he dies?" 752 00:54:49,037 --> 00:54:54,209 But I couldn't talk Jimmy into throwing Renan off the trip. (LAUGHS) 753 00:54:54,292 --> 00:54:57,879 It's like he was totally dug in. 754 00:54:57,962 --> 00:55:02,217 He just said, flat out, "If Renan feels he's ready, I trust Renan." 755 00:55:04,135 --> 00:55:06,221 JENNI: I was worried about Renan. 756 00:55:06,304 --> 00:55:07,388 (GROANING) 757 00:55:07,472 --> 00:55:10,475 (JENNI CONTINUES) But I was also worried about the well-being of the entire team... 758 00:55:10,558 --> 00:55:15,897 because... just to go up onto a face like that with a weak partner... 759 00:55:15,980 --> 00:55:19,150 where, what if they got into another big, bad storm? 760 00:55:19,234 --> 00:55:21,554 - (CRACKS) - (JENNI CONTINUES) Or what if one of 'em... 761 00:55:21,611 --> 00:55:23,696 got wacked in the head with a rock... 762 00:55:23,780 --> 00:55:25,824 and they had to get him down off, and they- 763 00:55:25,907 --> 00:55:28,827 You need to have your partners be sound and strong. 764 00:55:28,910 --> 00:55:32,997 You know, when our friends heard about it, they were like- 765 00:55:33,081 --> 00:55:35,834 They thought we were completely out of our minds. 766 00:55:35,917 --> 00:55:38,211 Whew. Dude, I don't know. 767 00:55:38,294 --> 00:55:41,381 No! No! You know, that's not right. 768 00:55:41,464 --> 00:55:43,341 This isn't like Conrad, or Jimmy. 769 00:55:43,424 --> 00:55:46,678 You know, these guys, they don't fuck around, they don't do stupid stuff. 770 00:55:46,761 --> 00:55:48,888 If they did, they'd be dead by now. 771 00:55:55,270 --> 00:55:57,939 Two or three times, I had these deep anxiety attacks. 772 00:55:58,022 --> 00:56:01,860 I mean, here it was, at 2:00 in the morning, and all of a sudden it was just like... 773 00:56:01,943 --> 00:56:07,407 this wave of anxiety came over me, and I'm- I'm up there, like, going, "Shit." 774 00:56:07,490 --> 00:56:11,286 I've got two kids sleeping upstairs. My wife's there. 775 00:56:11,369 --> 00:56:15,373 Another boy's off at college. I'm responsible for them. 776 00:56:15,456 --> 00:56:17,959 And I'm going, "You're going back?" 777 00:56:20,128 --> 00:56:21,963 You know, the rewards of climbing are huge. 778 00:56:22,046 --> 00:56:25,675 If you- if you survive it, if your family comes out of it okay... 779 00:56:25,758 --> 00:56:29,637 if everyone comes out, then climbing- climbing is so worth it. 780 00:56:29,721 --> 00:56:33,182 The problem is, as we know, you don't always come out of it okay. 781 00:56:33,266 --> 00:56:37,145 People die. And then you can't justify it. That is the great dilemma. 782 00:56:39,647 --> 00:56:41,733 Conrad knows this better than anyone. 783 00:56:41,816 --> 00:56:46,154 Look at what happened to Mugs, and Conrad's next partner, Alex. 784 00:56:46,237 --> 00:56:48,573 CONRAD: After the death of Mugs in '92... 785 00:56:48,656 --> 00:56:51,701 Alex Lowe became my main climbing partner. 786 00:56:51,784 --> 00:56:55,121 Alex was the premier climber at that time. 787 00:56:56,247 --> 00:57:00,752 Conrad was Alex's favorite partner... 788 00:57:00,835 --> 00:57:02,962 and best friend. 789 00:57:03,046 --> 00:57:06,382 Conrad was just right for him... 790 00:57:06,466 --> 00:57:09,260 because he could match Alex's pace. 791 00:57:09,344 --> 00:57:12,472 And there wasn't too many people who could do that. 792 00:57:12,555 --> 00:57:15,475 This is Nirvana, what this is. 793 00:57:15,558 --> 00:57:19,979 So we're gonna hang out, just enjoy the mountains. 794 00:57:20,063 --> 00:57:21,606 KRAKAUER: You know, Mugs was the mentor... 795 00:57:21,689 --> 00:57:24,943 but Alex was much more Conrad's equal. 796 00:57:25,026 --> 00:57:28,780 These are, you know, two of the most brilliant climbers ever. 797 00:57:28,863 --> 00:57:30,865 I mean, people were blown away by 'em. 798 00:57:30,949 --> 00:57:32,951 And they fed off each other! 799 00:57:34,202 --> 00:57:36,663 They were this perfect match, the perfect partnership. 800 00:57:36,746 --> 00:57:40,541 I went to Antarctica with both Alex and Conrad in '97... 801 00:57:40,625 --> 00:57:43,544 in one of the best trips I've ever done, and they were in rare form. 802 00:57:43,628 --> 00:57:45,338 Just brilliant to behold. 803 00:57:45,421 --> 00:57:48,466 So he had this new partner, and they were gonna tear up the world. 804 00:57:52,720 --> 00:57:56,140 CONRAD: Alex did a remarkable job of balancing family. 805 00:57:56,224 --> 00:57:58,810 We were all sort of vagabonds. 806 00:57:58,893 --> 00:58:02,730 And here's Alex. He's, like, legit. He's married, and he's got kids. 807 00:58:07,402 --> 00:58:10,989 I was married to Alex Lowe for 18 years. 808 00:58:11,072 --> 00:58:16,035 And, um, in the autumn of 1999... 809 00:58:16,119 --> 00:58:19,497 uh, he was on an expedition with Conrad. 810 00:58:19,580 --> 00:58:22,709 It was to Shishapangma, in Tibet. 811 00:58:22,792 --> 00:58:26,295 And, uh, they went up to take a look at the mountain. 812 00:58:28,381 --> 00:58:30,675 CONRAD: It was supposed to be a rest day. 813 00:58:30,758 --> 00:58:35,346 David Bridges, Alex and I went up, getting ready to do the climb... 814 00:58:35,430 --> 00:58:41,102 and we got to this point- it was probably 7:30, 8:00 in the morning. 815 00:58:41,185 --> 00:58:45,148 All of a sudden, there was, like, this crack, and we looked up and it was, "Oh, shit." 816 00:58:45,231 --> 00:58:47,025 There was a- a release. 817 00:58:47,108 --> 00:58:49,110 (RUMBLING) 818 00:58:49,193 --> 00:58:53,072 JENNI: Before Alex left, I had this weird premonition. 819 00:58:53,156 --> 00:58:55,450 I didn't want him to go on the climb. 820 00:58:55,533 --> 00:58:57,452 I said, you know... 821 00:58:57,535 --> 00:59:00,788 "I'm worried that you're gonna die in an avalanche." 822 00:59:00,872 --> 00:59:05,251 And Alex said, "I always come home." 823 00:59:05,334 --> 00:59:07,462 (RUMBLING) 824 00:59:07,545 --> 00:59:12,216 CONRAD: Alex and David ran straight downhill. I traversed at an angle. 825 00:59:12,300 --> 00:59:15,803 I was like, "I'm gonna lay down before the avalanche hits." 826 00:59:15,887 --> 00:59:21,017 And as I looked over, David and Alex were still upright, and they were still running. 827 00:59:21,100 --> 00:59:24,395 I was picked up and thrown, battered, tumbled. 828 00:59:24,479 --> 00:59:27,565 And just kind of half-buried. 829 00:59:27,648 --> 00:59:31,277 And then... it was silent. 830 00:59:34,906 --> 00:59:36,908 I remember standing up and walking around... 831 00:59:36,991 --> 00:59:41,746 and going over to where I had seen them, and there was nothing there. 832 00:59:41,829 --> 00:59:47,251 There was no ski stick or a glove sticking out of the snow or anything like that. 833 00:59:47,335 --> 00:59:49,837 Our other teammates came up to help with the search... 834 00:59:49,921 --> 00:59:54,675 and we searched there for the better part of the day. 835 00:59:54,759 --> 00:59:58,096 I went back down to camp. I needed some medical attention. 836 01:00:01,057 --> 01:00:04,477 JENNI: I got the phone call. I thought it was Alex at first. 837 01:00:04,560 --> 01:00:08,272 And Andrew's voice came on, and I instantly panicked. 838 01:00:08,356 --> 01:00:11,734 Andrew's like, "Jenni, there's been an avalanche." 839 01:00:11,818 --> 01:00:14,529 You know, and then my heart was racing. 840 01:00:15,780 --> 01:00:19,283 Right away, I said, "Is Conrad there?" 841 01:00:19,367 --> 01:00:21,994 Because, you know, I thought that... 842 01:00:22,078 --> 01:00:25,581 somehow Conrad would've protected Alex. 843 01:00:25,665 --> 01:00:29,210 You know, that it couldn't happen to him if Conrad was there with him. 844 01:00:31,295 --> 01:00:34,340 I remember Jenni saying, "Is there anything else you can do? 845 01:00:34,423 --> 01:00:39,637 Can you go back and look for him?" And we're like, "No. It's just- He's gone." 846 01:00:39,720 --> 01:00:43,432 And it was- it was- 847 01:00:43,516 --> 01:00:46,394 There was, um- There was just this finality of it. 848 01:00:49,605 --> 01:00:53,818 KRAKAUER: After Alex died, Conrad went through this transformation. 849 01:00:53,901 --> 01:00:55,653 He was just- He looked gaunt. 850 01:00:55,736 --> 01:01:01,075 He was- He had retreated somewhere deep inside and wasn't comin' out. 851 01:01:01,159 --> 01:01:04,412 I worried he was over the edge and wasn't coming back. 852 01:01:07,081 --> 01:01:09,375 CONRAD: It's just- I mean, the wheels were coming off. 853 01:01:09,458 --> 01:01:14,005 And, um, I didn't know why I was so fucked up. 854 01:01:14,088 --> 01:01:18,217 Gil Roberts, a friend of mine, who was in a very similar situation. 855 01:01:18,301 --> 01:01:20,678 He was there when his climbing partner died. 856 01:01:20,761 --> 01:01:24,348 And more than once, he picked up the phone, and he's like, "Hey, man. 857 01:01:24,432 --> 01:01:26,517 I've gotta come talk to you. We've gotta get together." 858 01:01:26,601 --> 01:01:29,562 And I didn't know why Gil wanted to get ahold of me. 859 01:01:29,645 --> 01:01:32,440 And it was, like- 860 01:01:32,523 --> 01:01:36,819 I remember his line. He's like, "Yep. Survivor's guilt is a bear." 861 01:01:36,903 --> 01:01:39,363 And having to do that. And it was, like- 862 01:01:39,447 --> 01:01:42,366 Because for me, it's, like, this heavy fucking thing... 863 01:01:42,450 --> 01:01:44,785 that wouldn't leave me alone. 864 01:01:44,869 --> 01:01:47,038 'Cause Alex had it going on. 865 01:01:47,121 --> 01:01:50,625 Here he was, he was successful. He had three kids, a happy married life. 866 01:01:50,708 --> 01:01:54,629 Everything was cool, and I lived in a van. 867 01:01:56,839 --> 01:02:01,886 JENNI: Conrad was filled with remorse over Alex's death... 868 01:02:01,969 --> 01:02:06,349 and he came back from the expedition... 869 01:02:06,432 --> 01:02:10,311 feeling like he was the one who should've died. 870 01:02:12,438 --> 01:02:14,440 CONRAD: Trying to find balance and peace in that... 871 01:02:14,523 --> 01:02:16,150 I just didn't know where to go. 872 01:02:16,234 --> 01:02:18,402 But it always circled back to being with Jenni... 873 01:02:18,486 --> 01:02:21,447 and the conversations that we had on the telephone... 874 01:02:21,530 --> 01:02:23,950 and being together with each other. 875 01:02:30,706 --> 01:02:32,416 JENNI: I think he felt like... 876 01:02:32,500 --> 01:02:36,337 to continue being a great friend, he needed to be there for us. 877 01:02:38,172 --> 01:02:42,176 It was like a little connection to Alex that was still there for me. 878 01:02:42,260 --> 01:02:46,764 And then, you know, before we- either of us knew what was happening... 879 01:02:46,847 --> 01:02:48,766 we were kind of falling in love. 880 01:02:48,849 --> 01:02:53,437 CONRAD: The duress of this tragedy- Jenni and I, we fell in love. 881 01:02:53,521 --> 01:02:59,026 And then eventually we married, and I have adopted the boys. 882 01:02:59,110 --> 01:03:01,946 (TYPING) 883 01:03:04,824 --> 01:03:08,286 JENNI: I wasn't like I chose and said, "Okay. 884 01:03:08,369 --> 01:03:11,539 I'm gonna fall in love with another climber." It just kind of happened. 885 01:03:13,541 --> 01:03:18,546 I still think I might have been better off with a cowboy. 886 01:03:20,381 --> 01:03:22,758 KRAKAUER: Conrad has this side to him that realizes... 887 01:03:22,842 --> 01:03:25,678 "I got some heavy responsibilities here." 888 01:03:25,761 --> 01:03:30,224 it's the key to Conrad. There's this constant dialectic. 889 01:03:30,308 --> 01:03:34,478 He needs the mountains to climb, but it's like, "Am I taking too many chances? 890 01:03:34,562 --> 01:03:37,732 Can I control the risk?" Of course you can't control the risk. 891 01:03:37,815 --> 01:03:41,527 "Well, why am I doing this? Because I have to do it or I go fucking crazy." 892 01:03:54,665 --> 01:03:58,336 RENAN: In the end, Jimmy and Conrad left the decision up to me. 893 01:03:58,419 --> 01:03:59,420 (SHUTTER CLICKS) 894 01:03:59,503 --> 01:04:02,673 Even though it'd only been five months since the accident... 895 01:04:02,757 --> 01:04:06,010 I decided I wanted to give it a go. 896 01:04:06,093 --> 01:04:10,639 CONRAD: We had become so close after the 2008 ordeal... 897 01:04:10,723 --> 01:04:14,518 that to not give him the opportunity- 898 01:04:14,602 --> 01:04:17,438 it wasn't celebrating the teamwork that we came into the climb with. 899 01:04:17,521 --> 01:04:19,732 - That was the decision. - (EXHALES) 900 01:04:24,695 --> 01:04:28,532 AMEE: Well, I wasn't really given a choice... in the matter. 901 01:04:28,616 --> 01:04:30,993 Renan actually decided to go to Meru... 902 01:04:31,077 --> 01:04:33,454 and bought a plane ticket and didn't even tell me. 903 01:04:34,455 --> 01:04:37,375 It was kind of a slap in the face, but... 904 01:04:37,458 --> 01:04:41,253 the bigger concern was his safety. 905 01:04:43,005 --> 01:04:45,216 JIMMY: He knew the heat that we were taking... 906 01:04:45,299 --> 01:04:49,637 and he knew that we had to trust him to let him go. 907 01:04:49,720 --> 01:04:51,931 And that's what we did. We trusted him. 908 01:04:54,850 --> 01:04:57,353 KRAKAUER: Maybe that's way over the heads of most people... 909 01:04:57,436 --> 01:05:01,774 that kind of risk and that kind of expression of trust. 910 01:05:01,857 --> 01:05:07,071 But when Conrad was a young buck, and Mugs was teaching him... 911 01:05:07,154 --> 01:05:10,324 they'd be at a really sketchy pitch- dangerous, you can't afford to fall. 912 01:05:10,408 --> 01:05:14,620 Mugs would be like, "Okay, Conrad, we all know that I can lead this. 913 01:05:14,703 --> 01:05:18,582 Now let's see if you can lead it. Are you ready?" 914 01:05:18,666 --> 01:05:21,752 So many decades later, it was Conrad... 915 01:05:21,836 --> 01:05:26,757 saying to Jimmy, Renan, "Okay, you guys had a rough spring. 916 01:05:26,841 --> 01:05:29,677 But you can do this. I trust you, and we're gonna do this." 917 01:05:42,273 --> 01:05:44,275 (CHATTERING) 918 01:05:51,365 --> 01:05:55,453 (CHANTING) 919 01:06:05,629 --> 01:06:09,467 JIMMY: The entire hike in was intense. 920 01:06:12,052 --> 01:06:15,973 There's no doubt that I had a heavy heart going into it. 921 01:06:16,056 --> 01:06:20,144 It felt just like so much... 922 01:06:20,227 --> 01:06:21,812 pressure. 923 01:06:21,896 --> 01:06:26,358 You know, it felt a little bit like we were heading to the gallows. You know? 924 01:06:47,922 --> 01:06:50,049 RENAN: Fifteen feet, Conrad! 925 01:06:53,844 --> 01:06:57,723 (EQUIPMENT CLINKING) 926 01:06:59,266 --> 01:07:01,936 (SHOUTING, INDISTINCT) 927 01:07:23,582 --> 01:07:27,878 CONRAD: The old geek ripped. 928 01:07:27,962 --> 01:07:30,214 - Is that what sent ya? - Yeah. 929 01:07:32,049 --> 01:07:36,178 I just heard the "ping" and then the fucking gear rattling. 930 01:07:36,262 --> 01:07:38,931 Cha-ching, cha-ching. 931 01:07:39,014 --> 01:07:41,725 Oh, it was a good- Of all the places to fall though- 932 01:07:41,809 --> 01:07:42,809 Ah, it's dreamy. 933 01:07:42,851 --> 01:07:45,312 JIMMY: That was a good place to fall. 934 01:07:45,396 --> 01:07:48,732 It must have been, like, five pounds on you, huh, Renan, like- 935 01:07:48,816 --> 01:07:53,279 RENAN: Yeah. Well, I got lifted off the triangle ledge. 936 01:07:54,697 --> 01:07:57,199 (FABRIC FLAPPING) 937 01:07:59,368 --> 01:08:01,370 (WIND HOWLING) 938 01:08:03,497 --> 01:08:05,624 - (RUSTLING) - (GRUNTING) 939 01:08:06,333 --> 01:08:11,088 Oh! Fuck! 940 01:08:13,090 --> 01:08:14,800 JIMMY: Oh, man. 941 01:08:15,801 --> 01:08:17,678 RENAN: Survival mode. 942 01:08:21,348 --> 01:08:23,350 It's broke. 943 01:08:25,352 --> 01:08:29,440 We're Himalayan big-wall climbing, and we broke our portaledge. 944 01:08:38,449 --> 01:08:40,534 - That's more straight. - Yeah. 945 01:08:49,418 --> 01:08:52,129 - JIMMY: Whew. - CONRAD: Athletic tape... 946 01:08:52,212 --> 01:08:55,633 two eye screws, and- and we're back in business. 947 01:08:56,216 --> 01:08:57,718 Whew. 948 01:09:08,228 --> 01:09:10,856 MAN: (SINGING) ♪ One night of magic rush ♪ 949 01:09:10,939 --> 01:09:13,817 ♪ The start a simple touch ♪ 950 01:09:13,901 --> 01:09:17,279 ♪ One night to push and scream ♪ 951 01:09:17,363 --> 01:09:19,323 ♪ And then relief ♪ 952 01:09:19,406 --> 01:09:22,034 ♪ Ten days of perfect tunes ♪ 953 01:09:22,117 --> 01:09:24,662 ♪ The colors red and blue ♪ 954 01:09:24,745 --> 01:09:28,415 ♪ We had a promise made ♪ 955 01:09:28,499 --> 01:09:31,502 ♪ We were in love ♪ 956 01:09:33,087 --> 01:09:35,839 ♪ To call for hands of above ♪ 957 01:09:35,923 --> 01:09:39,176 JIMMY: That there is called space hauling. 958 01:09:41,053 --> 01:09:43,597 This route's pretty steep. 959 01:09:43,681 --> 01:09:47,226 That's why all the shit's hanging off in space. (CHUCKLING) 960 01:09:57,277 --> 01:09:59,279 (MUTTERING) 961 01:10:01,782 --> 01:10:05,661 (CHUCKLES) I just had to film what we're eating right now. 962 01:10:06,787 --> 01:10:10,541 Conrad wants us to eat yesterday's leftovers. 963 01:10:10,624 --> 01:10:13,252 Oh, it looks great. 964 01:10:13,335 --> 01:10:15,629 CONRAD: We have one choice on the menu, and it is couscous. 965 01:10:15,713 --> 01:10:17,256 JIMMY: Tomorrow, what are we having for dinner? 966 01:10:17,339 --> 01:10:18,340 Couscous. 967 01:10:18,424 --> 01:10:20,134 - JIMMY: (LAUGHING) And the next day? - Couscous. 968 01:10:20,217 --> 01:10:21,927 JIMMY: What did we have for dinner four days ago? 969 01:10:22,010 --> 01:10:24,138 - Couscous. - JIMMY: Sweet. 970 01:10:24,221 --> 01:10:26,515 CONRAD: This looks really good, I think. 971 01:10:26,598 --> 01:10:30,686 I'm sure that, uh Happy and Leroy, my two dogs, would just love this. 972 01:10:30,769 --> 01:10:32,229 They'd be like, "Yeah!" 973 01:10:32,312 --> 01:10:34,148 We're not his dogs. 974 01:10:34,815 --> 01:10:36,316 Mmm. 975 01:10:38,360 --> 01:10:39,862 Mmm, couscous. 976 01:10:43,365 --> 01:10:44,867 (YAWNS) 977 01:10:57,921 --> 01:10:59,423 Whew. 978 01:11:15,189 --> 01:11:19,610 JIMMY: I was watching Renan, and he seemed confused and slow. 979 01:11:19,693 --> 01:11:21,779 I thought it might have been the altitude. 980 01:11:35,334 --> 01:11:37,044 I'm not sure what's going on. 981 01:11:38,086 --> 01:11:39,588 (METAL CLINKS) 982 01:11:39,671 --> 01:11:43,008 RENAN'S VOICE: Something was really wrong. 983 01:11:46,553 --> 01:11:51,683 I literally just turned my face away and cried. 984 01:11:54,269 --> 01:11:57,314 JIMMY: When we finally got the portaledge built and got inside... 985 01:11:57,397 --> 01:12:01,068 that's when Renan really fell apart. 986 01:12:01,151 --> 01:12:02,861 He just collapsed. 987 01:12:02,945 --> 01:12:06,865 (MAN VOCALIZING) 988 01:12:08,951 --> 01:12:11,829 (VOCALIZING CONTINUES) 989 01:12:11,912 --> 01:12:13,872 JIMMY: He tried to say something to me... 990 01:12:13,956 --> 01:12:17,835 and it was just complete gibberish. 991 01:12:17,918 --> 01:12:21,380 You know, you could see the alarm in his eyes that, like... 992 01:12:21,463 --> 01:12:23,173 however hard he was trying to speak... 993 01:12:23,257 --> 01:12:25,509 it wasn't happening. 994 01:12:25,592 --> 01:12:28,762 (VOCALIZING CONTINUES) 995 01:12:28,846 --> 01:12:33,016 It'd been a year and a half earlier that, uh, my father had suffered a stroke... 996 01:12:33,100 --> 01:12:35,853 and I'd seen what it does. 997 01:12:41,942 --> 01:12:44,528 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 998 01:12:55,956 --> 01:12:58,876 You know, we're making calculations in our head, and we're like... 999 01:12:58,959 --> 01:13:01,378 "Well, we can't go down right now. 1000 01:13:01,461 --> 01:13:04,298 We'll make a mistake. We're way too wasted." 1001 01:13:06,300 --> 01:13:10,345 CONRAD: it was a moment of, uh, anxiety. It was moment of unknown. 1002 01:13:10,429 --> 01:13:14,391 It was a moment of acceptance that we might not make it up the route. 1003 01:13:14,474 --> 01:13:19,021 Acceptance that- of Renan's health... 1004 01:13:19,104 --> 01:13:23,317 that where he was, there was nothing we could do about it. 1005 01:13:30,741 --> 01:13:33,243 (WIND WHISTLING) 1006 01:13:36,163 --> 01:13:38,165 (FABRIC FLAPPING) 1007 01:13:46,506 --> 01:13:49,092 RENAN: The next morning, the sun was shining. 1008 01:13:51,345 --> 01:13:53,221 I felt a little bit better... 1009 01:13:53,305 --> 01:13:55,807 but I still couldn't really talk. 1010 01:13:55,891 --> 01:14:01,146 All that I could think about is, "I don't want to go down." 1011 01:14:01,229 --> 01:14:05,275 "If we go down, then I'll never forgive myself." 1012 01:14:05,359 --> 01:14:10,364 I still just felt strongly that I had to contribute to the team and not let us down. 1013 01:14:13,241 --> 01:14:15,619 It was my turn to lead. 1014 01:14:15,702 --> 01:14:20,540 Those guys didn't want me to go, but I looked up at Jimmy... 1015 01:14:20,624 --> 01:14:25,128 nodded, and it was understood that I was going for it. 1016 01:14:27,756 --> 01:14:30,050 They were monitoring me very closely. 1017 01:14:36,640 --> 01:14:38,642 (EQUIPMENT CLINKING) 1018 01:14:45,482 --> 01:14:48,026 From somewhere, I started to feel this momentum... 1019 01:14:48,110 --> 01:14:50,237 and climbing started to feel good. 1020 01:14:53,240 --> 01:14:56,660 I couldn't believe I finished my leads. 1021 01:14:56,743 --> 01:14:59,121 It was this huge breakthrough for me. 1022 01:15:04,418 --> 01:15:07,838 Jimmy and Conrad were still really worried about me... 1023 01:15:08,755 --> 01:15:11,299 and they carried most of my weight. 1024 01:15:28,859 --> 01:15:33,071 Meru... it's relentless. Every time. 1025 01:15:33,155 --> 01:15:36,366 RENAN'S VOICE: We still don't know what happened that day. 1026 01:15:36,450 --> 01:15:40,203 We just smoked a cigarette together and talked about it... 1027 01:15:40,287 --> 01:15:42,622 and decided to keep going. 1028 01:15:52,132 --> 01:15:57,054 After seven days of climbing, we were just getting to the hard part. 1029 01:15:57,137 --> 01:16:00,307 The wall got super steep and overhanging. 1030 01:16:01,975 --> 01:16:04,227 CONRAD: This is pitch 20. Jimmy's getting after it. 1031 01:16:04,311 --> 01:16:07,647 It's the House of Cards, the start of the Indian Ocean Wall. 1032 01:16:11,902 --> 01:16:13,779 RENAN: I knew he was scared. 1033 01:16:15,155 --> 01:16:19,326 We all knew any mistake on this pitch could be catastrophic. 1034 01:16:20,911 --> 01:16:22,788 JIMMY: Wow, that's... it looks longer... 1035 01:16:22,871 --> 01:16:25,916 than it did last night. (LAUGHING) 1036 01:16:25,999 --> 01:16:28,251 In the House of Cards pitch, they called it that because... 1037 01:16:28,335 --> 01:16:31,088 it's these immense blocks of granite. 1038 01:16:31,171 --> 01:16:35,092 If you pull one of 'em too hard, this whole thing's gonna come down... 1039 01:16:35,175 --> 01:16:38,887 like a house of cards, only each card weighs, you know, 10,000 pounds... 1040 01:16:38,970 --> 01:16:42,641 and those sharp edges is gonna just floss 'em all off the wall. 1041 01:16:43,767 --> 01:16:45,769 See these giant blocks? 1042 01:16:47,646 --> 01:16:50,023 They are moving under my weight. 1043 01:16:53,777 --> 01:16:57,697 (HOLLOW KNOCKING) 1044 01:16:59,032 --> 01:17:01,368 Those are the sounds you don't like to hear. 1045 01:17:08,542 --> 01:17:10,293 (METAL CLINKING) 1046 01:17:12,546 --> 01:17:16,675 RENAN: It was really intense. He was up there for six hours... 1047 01:17:16,758 --> 01:17:19,719 and it was exhausting for all of us. 1048 01:17:22,430 --> 01:17:26,309 They're on a sloping hill, and when you hit 'em, you watch both of 'em going. 1049 01:17:26,393 --> 01:17:29,229 - Yeah, and everything here, I mean- - That would just chop everything. 1050 01:17:29,312 --> 01:17:31,523 And then we'd- we'd be fucked. 1051 01:17:39,573 --> 01:17:43,910 (WIND WHISTLING) 1052 01:17:53,295 --> 01:17:58,300 - (FABRIC FLAPPING) - Well, it's our summit-bid evening. 1053 01:17:59,426 --> 01:18:01,761 And it's dumping. 1054 01:18:03,346 --> 01:18:04,848 (SIGHS) 1055 01:18:05,682 --> 01:18:07,350 (MURMURS) 1056 01:18:07,434 --> 01:18:09,186 - CONRAD: More suffering. - JIMMY: It's been dumping... 1057 01:18:09,269 --> 01:18:14,399 - for... - since 3:30. 1058 01:18:14,482 --> 01:18:16,526 Five, six hours now. 1059 01:18:16,610 --> 01:18:19,112 (FABRIC FLAPPING) 1060 01:18:23,950 --> 01:18:26,953 JIMMY: How's it lookin' out there, Renan? 1061 01:18:27,037 --> 01:18:30,749 Well, despite the, uh... 1062 01:18:30,832 --> 01:18:33,251 heavy winds and getting battered... 1063 01:18:33,335 --> 01:18:36,546 in the ledge for the last four hours... 1064 01:18:36,630 --> 01:18:38,798 there's stars... 1065 01:18:38,882 --> 01:18:41,927 so we're goin' for it. 1066 01:19:07,577 --> 01:19:11,081 (EQUIPMENT JINGLING) 1067 01:19:17,170 --> 01:19:20,090 It's probably negative 20 out. 1068 01:19:20,173 --> 01:19:21,925 I can't feel my feet. 1069 01:19:24,761 --> 01:19:26,263 But at least it's windy. 1070 01:19:32,227 --> 01:19:33,979 (EXHALES SHARPLY) 1071 01:19:35,522 --> 01:19:37,274 Just waitin' for the sun. 1072 01:19:39,734 --> 01:19:41,528 (EXHALING) 1073 01:19:41,611 --> 01:19:44,531 Oh, man, I can't fucking think straight. 1074 01:19:44,614 --> 01:19:46,950 RENAN: Good job, Conrad! 1075 01:19:51,454 --> 01:19:54,291 (PANTING) 1076 01:19:59,087 --> 01:20:01,798 JIMMY: On the summit push, I think all of us... 1077 01:20:01,881 --> 01:20:05,844 and probably Conrad the most, was dreading the upper pitches. 1078 01:20:05,927 --> 01:20:09,055 Because he knew he was the only one that could do 'em. 1079 01:20:09,139 --> 01:20:13,101 And it was a really hard and dangerous lead. 1080 01:20:17,897 --> 01:20:20,400 RENAN: Conrad carried a lot of pressure that day. 1081 01:20:22,277 --> 01:20:26,239 It's really hard to explain to anyone what he did up there. 1082 01:20:44,924 --> 01:20:49,679 JIMMY: We finally get to the summit ridge, where we turned around in 2008. 1083 01:20:49,763 --> 01:20:54,309 And we hadn't really talked about who was gonna take the last lead. 1084 01:20:54,392 --> 01:20:56,603 And that was the final, unknown section. 1085 01:21:00,982 --> 01:21:05,695 Conrad looked at me, and he was like, "All right." 1086 01:21:05,779 --> 01:21:09,032 CONRAD: I was like, "Jimmy, this is your lead. 1087 01:21:09,115 --> 01:21:13,078 It's your turn to take the reigns." 1088 01:22:07,173 --> 01:22:08,633 (GROANS) 1089 01:22:08,716 --> 01:22:10,927 (PANTING) 1090 01:22:11,010 --> 01:22:12,720 CONRAD: Nice, Jimmy. 1091 01:22:19,853 --> 01:22:22,021 Whoo! 1092 01:22:22,772 --> 01:22:24,941 Whoo! 1093 01:22:29,279 --> 01:22:32,866 - Yeah, Renan. - Fuck, yeah. 1094 01:22:37,078 --> 01:22:38,580 (LAUGHING) 1095 01:22:41,791 --> 01:22:43,126 Yeah. 1096 01:22:45,628 --> 01:22:47,380 Yeah, Mugs! 1097 01:22:48,214 --> 01:22:49,924 Got it for ya! 1098 01:22:51,009 --> 01:22:52,886 (PANTING) 1099 01:23:00,810 --> 01:23:03,813 (BREATHING REGGEDLY) 1100 01:23:22,457 --> 01:23:24,334 (EXHALES SHARPLY) 1101 01:23:30,340 --> 01:23:33,426 Ten years of climbing together. 1102 01:23:46,773 --> 01:23:48,691 RENAN: There was... 1103 01:23:50,151 --> 01:23:53,029 There was some points where I didn't think I was gonna make it. 1104 01:23:53,112 --> 01:23:57,617 And I know it stressed those guys out a lot, so- 1105 01:24:00,703 --> 01:24:03,039 Definitely happy to be up here... 1106 01:24:04,249 --> 01:24:08,711 and, uh, take part in Conrad's 20-year dream... 1107 01:24:08,795 --> 01:24:14,300 and 10 years of Jimmy and Conrad climbing together... 1108 01:24:14,384 --> 01:24:18,555 and... yeah, feel part of the team. 1109 01:26:01,908 --> 01:26:05,328 WOMAN: (SINGING) ♪ When the cold bites your bones ♪ 1110 01:26:05,411 --> 01:26:08,665 ♪ And gets in your heart ♪ 1111 01:26:08,748 --> 01:26:14,087 ♪ It can make you feel hopeless ♪ 1112 01:26:16,381 --> 01:26:22,679 ♪ And fear will come to steal your sun and make it dark ♪ 1113 01:26:23,763 --> 01:26:28,935 ♪ But don't believe you're lonely ♪ 1114 01:26:31,354 --> 01:26:36,859 ♪ We've all had that moment when our shoulders sink ♪ 1115 01:26:36,943 --> 01:26:40,446 ♪ And we sit back and think ♪ 1116 01:26:40,530 --> 01:26:44,742 ♪ We could just run ♪ 1117 01:26:44,826 --> 01:26:49,205 ♪ But we're not born to chase the fading light ♪ 1118 01:26:49,288 --> 01:26:53,042 ♪ We're not born to fall and lose the fight ♪ 1119 01:26:53,126 --> 01:26:58,715 ♪ Never letting go Oh, no, oh ♪ 1120 01:26:58,798 --> 01:27:03,886 ♪ I'm askin' you to lift me, lift me higher than I ever been ♪ 1121 01:27:03,970 --> 01:27:07,807 ♪ I Hold your breath and say you're gonna come with me ♪ 1122 01:27:07,890 --> 01:27:12,395 ♪ We were born to follow ♪ 1123 01:27:12,478 --> 01:27:16,232 ♪ The light that never fails ♪ 1124 01:27:16,315 --> 01:27:20,194 (WOMAN VOCALIZING) 1125 01:27:22,905 --> 01:27:28,828 ♪ You're scared to fight, you're scared to climb, afraid to die ♪ 1126 01:27:30,371 --> 01:27:35,042 ♪ But I can be your courage ♪ 1127 01:27:37,670 --> 01:27:43,509 ♪ And help you see you've already won this ♪ 1128 01:27:45,261 --> 01:27:50,558 ♪ We all have that moment when our head hangs low ♪ 1129 01:27:50,641 --> 01:27:54,103 ♪ We question if we should go ♪ 1130 01:27:54,187 --> 01:27:58,649 ♪ Or turn back and run ♪ 1131 01:27:58,733 --> 01:28:03,112 ♪ But we're not born to chase the fading light ♪ 1132 01:28:03,196 --> 01:28:06,866 ♪ We're not born to fall and lose the fight ♪ 1133 01:28:06,949 --> 01:28:12,622 ♪ Never letting go Oh, no, oh ♪ 1134 01:28:12,705 --> 01:28:17,794 ♪ I'm askin' you to lift me, lift me higher than I ever been ♪ 1135 01:28:17,877 --> 01:28:21,756 ♪ I Hold your breath and say you're gonna come with me ♪ 1136 01:28:21,839 --> 01:28:26,302 ♪ We were born to follow ♪ 1137 01:28:26,385 --> 01:28:33,893 ♪ The light that never fails ♪ 1138 01:28:33,976 --> 01:28:40,608 ♪ Come along We're settin' sail ♪ 1139 01:28:41,651 --> 01:28:44,987 ♪ Never looking back again ♪ 1140 01:28:49,242 --> 01:28:52,829 ♪ We're not born to chase the fading light ♪ 1141 01:28:52,912 --> 01:28:56,749 ♪ We're not born to fall and lose the fight ♪ 1142 01:28:56,833 --> 01:29:02,421 ♪ Never letting go Oh, no, oh ♪ 1143 01:29:02,505 --> 01:29:07,718 ♪ I'm askin' you to lift me, lift me higher than I ever been ♪ 1144 01:29:07,802 --> 01:29:11,514 ♪ Hold your breath and say you're gonna come with me ♪ 1145 01:29:11,597 --> 01:29:16,018 ♪ We were born to follow ♪ 1146 01:29:16,102 --> 01:29:20,857 ♪ The light that never fails ♪ 1147 01:29:20,940 --> 01:29:26,320 ♪ The light that never fails ♪ 1148 01:29:26,404 --> 01:29:30,867 ♪ We were born to follow ♪ 1149 01:29:30,950 --> 01:29:38,541 - ♪ The light that never ♪ - (VOCALIZING) 1150 01:29:38,624 --> 01:29:45,756 - ♪ Light that never ♪ - (VOCALIZING) 1151 01:29:45,840 --> 01:29:51,345 ♪ The light that never fails ♪ 1152 01:29:52,346 --> 01:30:00,522 Improved By: Fidel33 Sub Upload Date: November 20, 2015