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(THE BOXER PLAYING ON RADIO)
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(SINGING ALONG)♪ I am just a poor boy ♪
♪ Though my story's seldom told ♪
3
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:03,353
♪ I have squandered my resistance. ♪
4
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♪ For a pocketful of mumbles ♪
♪ Such are promises. ♪
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♪ All lies and jests ♪
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(MIMICS ECHOING DRUM SOUND)
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♪ Just a come-on from those ♪
♪ gals on Seventh Avenue. ♪
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♪ Whoo-hoo! ♪
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♪ So lonesome that I took ♪
♪ some comfort there ♪
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(VOCALIZING)
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(MUSIC STOPS)
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(BANGING)
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(FOOTSTEPS PATTERING)
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- Bonnie?
- BONNIE: Who is it?
15
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Donovan?
16
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- Bonnie?
- Yes?
17
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Donovan!
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(FOOTSTEPS PATTERING)
19
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(DOOR LOCKING)
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BONNIE:
In here.
21
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- Yes? Donovan, is everything all right?
- Yeah, the production meeting was put off,
22
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- so I thought... Who's here?
- Here?
23
00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:06,602
Hmm. Who owns that
piece-of-shit van down there?
24
00:03:06,728 --> 00:03:07,936
Oh!
25
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It's just a guy going door to
door selling pool cleaner.
26
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So why'd he lock
himself in the den?
27
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Well, he... Oh, God.
28
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- You remember my friend Ollie?
- Ollie Olerud? Short, cretinous wanker.
29
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(EXCLAIMS)
30
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- Ollie's in there?
- Yes.
31
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I see.
32
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Well, I'm glad he finally
got himself a job.
33
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I'd always picked him as some sort of
deadbeat, but happy to be proved wrong.
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So he's selling pool cleaner now?
Well, this is the neighborhood for that.
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Just door to door, "Running low
on chlorine?" That kind of thing.
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It's quite a coincidence him dropping by,
and you two knowing each other so well.
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Donovan, please. Let's just all talk.
I mean, I think...
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How you doing, Donovan?
How you doing, man?
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Good day, Ollie. I'm great. You?
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00:04:00,990 --> 00:04:05,869
- Hey, can't complain, man.
- Excellent.
41
00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:08,080
Well, let's get right down
to it, then, shall we?
42
00:04:08,164 --> 00:04:10,540
We'll take a couple
of vacuum hoses.
43
00:04:10,625 --> 00:04:13,585
We probably need a new filter
around about now. Maybe...
44
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:16,797
Wait a minute, darling. Do we
actually have a swimming pool?
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00:04:16,881 --> 00:04:20,759
Okay. Okay, man. Now let's be
reasonable about this, okay?
46
00:04:20,843 --> 00:04:24,763
So you caught me porking... Having
relations with your old lady.
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BONNIE:
God.
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00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:30,477
And now, we're all feeling just a little
bit embarrassed by the whole thing, so...
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(EXCLAIMS) What the hey, man? I mean,
I know it's a drag and all, but these things...
50
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Hey! Hey, hey. We didn't
actually have sex.
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(STAMMERS) I was depressed,
'cause I'm impotent, you know.
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(CRYING) Unable to
achieve an erection.
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I have been for over a year now, man,
and I needed someone to talk to.
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I mean, think about it, man.
A year without an erection?
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BONNIE:
Leave him alone!
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(GROANS)
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You should have seen this coming,
you Australian piece of shit!
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Bitch. That's my Daytime Television
Lifetime Achievement Award.
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Cheesy bastard!
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(SCREAMING)
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You whore!
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(GROANS)
Christ!
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Okay!
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All right, you want fun and games?
All right.
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I'll give you fun and games.
Explain this away.
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(FIRES GUN)
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BONNIE: (SCREAMS)
Ollie!
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DONOVAN: That's my Jag!
That's my Jag!
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That's my bloody Jag!
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You bitch! Bitch! Bitch!
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Bye-bye, baby!
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Oh, what are you looking at?
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(LAUGHS)
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Explain this away, darling.
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(LAUGHING)
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- WOMAN: (ON PHONE) Miles Massey's office.
- Hey, it's me. Any messages?
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00:08:51,781 --> 00:08:54,199
- Yeah. Quite a few. Where are you?
- Just whitening.
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00:08:54,283 --> 00:08:56,159
Jim says he wants a meeting
today if possible.
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00:08:56,244 --> 00:08:59,037
- What else?
- Chapman says his wife is now in Tahoe.
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All right, tell Amstedler
I'll return in 20 minutes.
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00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:05,460
Get Wrigley to look up Oliphant V.
Oliphant, Commonwealth of Virginia,
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00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,379
for its relevance in
the Chapman filing.
83
00:09:07,463 --> 00:09:09,464
Oliphant v. Oliphant.
Relevance in Chapman.
84
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,091
She said she took
the kids to Tahoe?
85
00:09:11,175 --> 00:09:12,895
- That's right.
- Wait. Which side of Tahoe?
86
00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:14,010
She said it was a cruise.
87
00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:16,930
Yeah, well, if the cruise goes
all the way around the lake,
88
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she's left the state,
and she's in breach.
89
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:22,060
Tell Wrigley to prepare a
filing to attach. Mmm-hmm.
90
00:09:22,144 --> 00:09:27,232
Everything. Primary residence, beach house,
ski cabin, auto, stocks, bonds, dental floss.
91
00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:28,400
Gonna lose you.
92
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:29,568
Uh-huh.
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00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:31,319
MILES: (ON PHONE)
And tell Fred Armatrading that
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00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,989
we have pictures of his
wife with the oral surgeon.
95
00:09:34,073 --> 00:09:37,450
Oh, and get a fruit and pastry basket
in the conference room for my 9:30.
96
00:09:37,535 --> 00:09:38,910
Didn't have time for
breakfast this morning.
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00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:42,414
- Where are you?
- Coming at you.
98
00:09:42,498 --> 00:09:46,167
- Your 9:00 is here. Bonnie Donaly.
- Bonnie Donaly.
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Mrs. Donaly.
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00:10:03,644 --> 00:10:04,811
Mmm-hmm.
101
00:10:08,190 --> 00:10:12,027
Yes, your husband did show remarkable
foresight in taking those pictures.
102
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And, yes, absent
a swimming pool,
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the presence of a pool man
would appear to be suspicious.
104
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:23,705
But, madam, who is the real victim here?
Let me suggest to you the following.
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00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:27,459
Your husband, who on a prior
occasion had slapped you, beat you.
106
00:10:27,543 --> 00:10:29,583
- I think that word is not inappropriate.
- No, I...
107
00:10:29,587 --> 00:10:33,548
Let me finish, please. I'm not
concerned with who slapped whom first.
108
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:35,592
Your husband, who had
beaten you repeatedly...
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00:10:35,676 --> 00:10:36,676
No, he never...
110
00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:39,971
Please. Repeatedly, was at the
time, brandishing your firearm.
111
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:42,057
- It was his gun.
- And we'll get it back for you.
112
00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:47,562
Trying, in his rage, to shoot an
acquaintance, a friend of long standing.
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00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:48,730
They never really
cared for each other.
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00:10:48,814 --> 00:10:51,900
And if not for your
cool-headed intervention,
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00:10:51,984 --> 00:10:54,944
his tantrum might have ended this
schmo's life and ruined his own.
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00:10:55,029 --> 00:10:59,783
As for the sexual indiscretion
which he imagined took place,
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wasn't it, in fact, he who was
sleeping with the pool man?
118
00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:10,168
No? Am I going too far here?
Were his sexual... No.
119
00:11:10,252 --> 00:11:12,253
- I don't...
- Sorry. I'm not omniscient.
120
00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:16,216
The point is that he acted upon an
assumption which he cannot prove,
121
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and, I take it, you deny.
122
00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:20,970
- Well...
- Fine. I'll take the case.
123
00:11:21,055 --> 00:11:24,349
It's imperative that I meet with Oliver
Olerud before we proceed any further,
124
00:11:24,433 --> 00:11:28,520
so that I can massage the
kinks out of our testimony.
125
00:11:28,604 --> 00:11:30,730
Do you really think we
could put all this across?
126
00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:33,983
The truth is so self-evident
to me, Mrs. Donaly,
127
00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:38,405
that I'm sure that I'll be able to make
it equally as transparent to any jury,
128
00:11:38,489 --> 00:11:40,365
should your husband decide
to take it that far.
129
00:11:40,449 --> 00:11:44,202
We'll need to caucus again to draw up a
picture of your husband's net worth.
130
00:11:44,286 --> 00:11:48,123
A map of enemy territory, so to speak.
You said that he's a television producer?
131
00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:51,292
He has a soap opera, The Sands of Time.
It's a silly show.
132
00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:54,713
Well, it'll be yours soon.
Thank you very much.
133
00:11:54,797 --> 00:11:58,341
- Oh, thank you, Mr. Massey.
- Yes. Bye-bye.
134
00:12:01,178 --> 00:12:04,055
Still you have to admire him
for taking those pictures.
135
00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:07,559
LAWYER: Now, Mrs. Gutman,
you testified
136
00:12:07,643 --> 00:12:13,565
that you were your husband's sexual slave
for 36 years during your marriage.
137
00:12:13,649 --> 00:12:17,610
Except for two years when he was
in the Navy in Southeast Asia.
138
00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:20,572
And before your marriage,
what was your profession?
139
00:12:20,656 --> 00:12:23,283
MRS. GUTMAN: I was a hostess
for BraniffAirlines.
140
00:12:23,367 --> 00:12:25,702
And what is your
husband's profession?
141
00:12:25,786 --> 00:12:31,166
He manufactures staples and industrial
brad tacks. He's very successful.
142
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:36,087
How would you describe your
husband's sexual proclivities?
143
00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:40,675
Well, at first, he was a very
gentle and tender lover.
144
00:12:41,218 --> 00:12:43,470
But then he became
more and more fixated
145
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:46,306
on toys and machinery and
devices of various kinds.
146
00:12:46,390 --> 00:12:50,602
I can't help it. You don't decide
to become bored. It just happens.
147
00:12:50,686 --> 00:12:53,855
You're just looking for trouble.
It's a midlife crisis.
148
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:57,066
Look, get yourself a new car.
149
00:12:57,151 --> 00:13:02,405
I have a new car. I have two new cars.
I have a tab at the Mercedes dealership.
150
00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:06,284
Torn the house down twice.
Rebuilt the cabin in Vail.
151
00:13:06,368 --> 00:13:08,787
Got three of those yard people.
152
00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:12,332
- Gardeners.
- Gardeners. Got a man who waxes my jet.
153
00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:17,462
These encounters were videotaped.
Sometimes there would be a gismo.
154
00:13:17,546 --> 00:13:22,008
- LAWYER: A gismo?
- He had a device he called The Intruder.
155
00:13:22,092 --> 00:13:24,886
It was something he had the
engineers at the factory design.
156
00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:29,098
And then he had a prototype built out
of the parts from our vacuum cleaner.
157
00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:30,225
I see.
158
00:13:30,309 --> 00:13:33,311
So the vacuum cleaner wasn't
available to me for several months.
159
00:13:33,395 --> 00:13:36,773
- Several months without the appliance?
- Yes.
160
00:13:36,857 --> 00:13:39,150
Problem is everyone is
willing to compromise.
161
00:13:39,235 --> 00:13:43,696
That's the problem with the institution
of marriage. It's based on compromise.
162
00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:46,825
Even through its dissolution.
Mrs. Gutman here,
163
00:13:46,909 --> 00:13:50,245
she's gonna score some points concerning
her husband's sexual politics.
164
00:13:50,329 --> 00:13:51,788
Naturally, we'll try to impeach.
165
00:13:51,872 --> 00:13:55,250
And then the entire process
will find an equilibrium point
166
00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:57,836
based on the skill of
the individual lawyers.
167
00:13:57,920 --> 00:14:01,840
And then both parties will go home with
their portion of the staple factory.
168
00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:06,052
- That's life. Life is compromise.
- That's not life. That's death.
169
00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:13,059
Struggle and challenge and ultimate
destruction of your opponent, that's life.
170
00:14:13,143 --> 00:14:19,983
Let me ask you something. Attila the Hun.
Ivan the Terrible. Henry the Eighth.
171
00:14:20,067 --> 00:14:21,609
What do they have in common?
172
00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:26,364
- Middle name?
- No, they didn't just win.
173
00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:29,534
- They destroyed.
- JUDGE: Mr. Massey? Mr. Massey?
174
00:14:29,618 --> 00:14:33,788
Again I ask, have you any
questions for the complainant?
175
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:39,252
I'm sorry, Your Honor. I was just
consulting with an associate.
176
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:45,174
Now, Mrs. Gutman, do you know
a man named David Gonzalez?
177
00:14:46,969 --> 00:14:50,179
Well, he's the tennis
pro at the club.
178
00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:52,640
The tennis pro?
179
00:14:53,976 --> 00:14:58,980
Then why are your letters addressed
to him, "Dear, David and Goliath"?
180
00:14:59,064 --> 00:15:00,064
(CAR TIRES SCREECHING)
181
00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:01,441
(WOMAN WHOOPING)
182
00:15:17,833 --> 00:15:19,292
(WOMAN LAUGHING)
183
00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:26,007
WOMAN: Go, Rexie!
Go, Rexie, baby!
184
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:36,684
Whoo-hoo!
185
00:15:44,818 --> 00:15:46,486
REX: (LAUGHS)
Cabin seven.
186
00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:51,866
Choo-choo.
187
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:55,620
(IMITATES TRAIN WHISTLE)
188
00:16:16,183 --> 00:16:21,354
Choo-choo.
189
00:16:21,438 --> 00:16:22,855
(EXCLAIMS)
190
00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:27,902
Choo-choo.
191
00:16:28,487 --> 00:16:30,238
(IMITATES TRAIN WHISTLE)
192
00:16:36,787 --> 00:16:38,496
(WOMAN GIGGLING)
193
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:43,251
(SCREAMS)
194
00:16:43,335 --> 00:16:46,087
GUS:
I'm gonna nail your ass.
195
00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:48,297
Oh, yeah. I'm gonna
nail your ass.
196
00:16:48,382 --> 00:16:49,632
(REX SCREAMING)
197
00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:53,970
Boy, I'm gonna nail your ass. Your ass.
The old billionaire.
198
00:16:54,054 --> 00:16:55,638
Come to papa. Come on.
199
00:16:55,723 --> 00:16:57,890
I'm gonna get it. I got it.
200
00:16:57,975 --> 00:16:59,183
(BOTH CLAMORING)
201
00:16:59,268 --> 00:17:01,352
GUS:
I'm gonna nail your ass.
202
00:17:02,563 --> 00:17:05,064
I'm gonna nail your ass. Yeah.
203
00:17:05,149 --> 00:17:08,818
- REX: This is a silly misunderstanding.
- I'm gonna nail your ass.
204
00:17:08,902 --> 00:17:10,028
Get that thing off me now!
205
00:17:10,112 --> 00:17:15,241
Yeah, I'm gonna nail your ass. I'm gonna
nail your ass. I'm gonna nail your ass!
206
00:17:15,325 --> 00:17:17,618
Yep. I nailed his ass.
207
00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:20,580
I thought he'd outgrown trains.
208
00:17:20,664 --> 00:17:23,583
They never grow up, lady.
They just get tubby.
209
00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:26,127
How charming. An aphorist.
210
00:17:26,211 --> 00:17:30,590
Oh, yeah, I've always had ample proportions
but believe you me, it's all muscle.
211
00:17:30,674 --> 00:17:31,716
I'm as hard as a rock.
212
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:34,385
I'm not one of these cream-puff,
sit-behind-a-desk private dicks.
213
00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:36,429
- I'm an ass nailer.
- So I see.
214
00:17:36,513 --> 00:17:39,807
Gym four times a week.
Hour and a half, plus stretching.
215
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:44,145
Lifecycle. Lifestep. Lifecircuit.
Gus Petch don't pussyfoot around.
216
00:17:44,229 --> 00:17:48,566
I must say, for someone in your line of work,
you don't exhibit a great deal of tact.
217
00:17:48,650 --> 00:17:53,196
You want tact, call a tactician. You
want an ass nailed, you call Gus Petch.
218
00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:55,364
Christ, you seem to be
taking it pretty good.
219
00:17:55,449 --> 00:17:59,202
I've seen them come in here weep and
wail like Baptists at a funeral.
220
00:17:59,286 --> 00:18:02,705
Like they hired me to prove their
husbands weren't fooling around.
221
00:18:02,790 --> 00:18:06,542
- Don't get me wrong, Mr...
- Petch. Gus Petch.
222
00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:12,590
Whilst I don't find this terribly amusing,
I am delighted that you found this material.
223
00:18:12,674 --> 00:18:19,388
This is going to be my passport to
wealth, independence and freedom.
224
00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:20,598
(CHUCKLES)
225
00:18:20,682 --> 00:18:24,185
Sounds like to me you
gonna nail his ass.
226
00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:33,861
Honey? Honey?
227
00:18:34,196 --> 00:18:36,197
MARYLIN: (ON INTERCOM)
Rex, get away from the door.
228
00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:43,746
Honey? (LAUGHS) My key doesn't work.
Can we talk about this?
229
00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:46,290
Rex, get away from the door.
230
00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:48,042
Oh, look, I know that
you're upset, honey.
231
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:51,796
Rex, for your own safety,
get away from the door.
232
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:56,634
- I don't like having to set the dogs on you.
- For crying out loud. If we could... Dogs?
233
00:18:56,718 --> 00:18:58,219
(DOGS BARKING)
234
00:19:06,895 --> 00:19:08,312
(GASPS)
235
00:19:13,193 --> 00:19:16,946
MARYLIN: Yes, dogs. I wanted some
security since I'll be living here alone.
236
00:19:17,030 --> 00:19:19,699
Look, Marylin, can't we have a
civilized discussion about this?
237
00:19:19,783 --> 00:19:20,783
Our lawyers can.
238
00:19:22,035 --> 00:19:23,369
(SCREAMS)
239
00:19:23,453 --> 00:19:26,497
You've a discovery hearing at
5:30 for the Maxine Gopnik case.
240
00:19:26,582 --> 00:19:27,999
- Discovery. Gopnik.
- And a Lance Kelso called.
241
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:30,668
He read your article about palimony
settlements in same-sex partnerships.
242
00:19:30,752 --> 00:19:31,836
Lance Kelso.
243
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:33,671
- And would like to schedule an appointment.
- Same-sex.
244
00:19:33,755 --> 00:19:36,757
Arthur Yardumian and his tax attorney want
to reschedule their caucus for tomorrow.
245
00:19:36,842 --> 00:19:37,842
Yardumian.
246
00:19:37,926 --> 00:19:39,468
Arthur had to fly to Atlanta
for a deadbeat dad hearing.
247
00:19:39,553 --> 00:19:44,557
- Atlanta.
- And your 10:30 is here. Rex Rexroth.
248
00:19:44,641 --> 00:19:47,768
- Rex Rexroth?
- Real estate. He's okay.
249
00:19:51,106 --> 00:19:54,692
- Mr. Rexroth.
- Call me Rex, please.
250
00:19:54,776 --> 00:19:57,612
Miles Massey. Please, sit.
Relax.
251
00:19:57,696 --> 00:20:00,948
Consider this office
your office, your haven,
252
00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:04,076
your war room for the
duration of the campaign.
253
00:20:04,161 --> 00:20:09,373
- Thank you.
- Now, sir, tell me your troubles.
254
00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:13,753
Well, my wife has me between
a rock and a hard place.
255
00:20:13,837 --> 00:20:15,963
That's her job.
You should respect that.
256
00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:19,926
When I first met Marylin,
we were crazy about each other.
257
00:20:20,010 --> 00:20:23,554
Not emotionally, of course. Just we
couldn't keep our hands off each other.
258
00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:26,140
But then...
(SIGHS) Then...
259
00:20:27,601 --> 00:20:32,146
- Time marches on. Ardor cools.
- Yeah.
260
00:20:32,814 --> 00:20:36,067
So we had an understanding.
261
00:20:36,151 --> 00:20:39,070
- Whereby?
- We could see other people.
262
00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:43,658
Has Mrs. Rexroth pursued the opportunities
implicit in your arrangement?
263
00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:46,077
I can only assume.
264
00:20:46,161 --> 00:20:49,497
Not in court you can't.
Has she retained counsel?
265
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,667
I don't know.
She has Rottweilers.
266
00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:58,839
Not a good sign. And have you, yourself,
exploited your understood freedom?
267
00:21:00,008 --> 00:21:05,346
There's a lady, a young lady.
She lets me be myself.
268
00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:10,351
Of course. And your wife is
aware and/or has evidence?
269
00:21:10,435 --> 00:21:11,769
- Video.
- Ha!
270
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:18,192
To cut to the chase, forensically
speaking, is there a prenup?
271
00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:28,160
"The fault, dear Brutus, lies not
in our stars, but in ourselves."
272
00:21:28,245 --> 00:21:31,914
Let me ask you this, what kind
of a settlement do you seek?
273
00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:35,126
What are, for you, the
parameters of the possible?
274
00:21:35,210 --> 00:21:39,255
Well, that's the problem. I can't
afford to give her anything.
275
00:21:43,427 --> 00:21:44,468
Nothing?
276
00:21:44,553 --> 00:21:46,387
Well, yeah, I know that
sounds a little rough,
277
00:21:46,471 --> 00:21:50,474
but, listen, I'm about to close a
deal to develop some mini-malls.
278
00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:52,310
I am mortgaged up to my heinie.
279
00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:55,604
If this deal goes south, I am ruined.
I will lose millions.
280
00:21:55,689 --> 00:22:01,861
So you propose that, in spite of
demonstrable infidelity on your part,
281
00:22:01,945 --> 00:22:06,073
your unoffending wife should
be tossed out on her ear.
282
00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:09,243
Well, is that possible?
283
00:22:14,791 --> 00:22:15,875
It's a challenge.
284
00:22:15,959 --> 00:22:19,670
Why don't you come out to Malibu and
see my new beach house tomorrow?
285
00:22:19,755 --> 00:22:23,674
- I didn't know Dimitri had a beach house.
- Neither did I until my lawyer found it.
286
00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:26,969
Quite a paper trail.
Had it in the dog's name.
287
00:22:27,054 --> 00:22:30,431
WOMAN 1: Well, tomorrow won't work.
I'm having a body wrap. How's Wednesday?
288
00:22:30,515 --> 00:22:32,195
Hair appointment in the morning.
Afternoon?
289
00:22:32,267 --> 00:22:34,352
Shrink. How's your Thursday?
290
00:22:34,436 --> 00:22:37,104
I'm having facial injections.
That kills Friday and Saturday.
291
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:39,523
- BOTOX?
- Butt fat.
292
00:22:39,608 --> 00:22:42,318
- Does that really work?
- You tell me.
293
00:22:42,402 --> 00:22:43,819
Hello, darlings.
294
00:22:43,945 --> 00:22:45,363
(ALL BLOWING KISSES)
295
00:22:46,615 --> 00:22:49,367
So, you and Rex are...
296
00:22:49,451 --> 00:22:54,038
Well, as my private investigator put
it, "We're gonna nail his ass."
297
00:22:54,122 --> 00:22:58,459
I've been trying to nail George's ass
for years, but he is so careful.
298
00:22:58,543 --> 00:22:59,794
(CHOKING)
299
00:23:00,629 --> 00:23:01,921
(COUGHS)
300
00:23:02,339 --> 00:23:05,549
- Are you all right, Claire?
- Down the wrong pipe. (LAUGHS)
301
00:23:07,260 --> 00:23:09,387
- So who's your lawyer?
- Freddy Bender.
302
00:23:09,471 --> 00:23:12,723
I have an appointment this afternoon
with Rex and his schnauzer.
303
00:23:12,808 --> 00:23:15,351
- WOMAN 1: So who's Rex's guy?
- Miles Massey.
304
00:23:15,435 --> 00:23:18,521
Miles Massey? Of Massey Myerson?
305
00:23:18,605 --> 00:23:20,481
- MARYLIN: Do you know him?
- By reputation,
306
00:23:20,565 --> 00:23:23,609
and, Marylin, he's no schnauzer.
307
00:23:23,693 --> 00:23:26,570
He got Phyllis Rumsey that cute
little island of George's.
308
00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:29,255
George was so impressed, he hired
him when he divorced his second.
309
00:23:29,324 --> 00:23:31,826
- Muriel Rumsey.
- Who's she?
310
00:23:31,910 --> 00:23:34,829
Now? Night manager
at McDonald's.
311
00:23:34,913 --> 00:23:39,083
But, Marylin, do we
have a man for you.
312
00:23:39,167 --> 00:23:41,001
Thorstenson Gieselensen.
313
00:23:41,086 --> 00:23:43,879
- He just separated from his third.
- He's in fish.
314
00:23:43,964 --> 00:23:45,631
- He is fish.
- Well, he's tuna.
315
00:23:45,715 --> 00:23:48,801
Ladies, I'm not seeing anyone until
I've finished nailing Rex's ass.
316
00:23:48,885 --> 00:23:51,720
But, Marylin, this man is tuna.
317
00:23:51,805 --> 00:23:55,182
Sarah, one husband at a time.
318
00:23:57,811 --> 00:24:00,438
I'll do the talking. I know
you'll be tempted to chime in,
319
00:24:00,522 --> 00:24:03,941
but remember that you're in an
emotionally vulnerable state.
320
00:24:04,025 --> 00:24:07,695
- I'm the professional.
- Oh. Okay.
321
00:24:08,196 --> 00:24:09,447
MILES:
Freddy.
322
00:24:11,825 --> 00:24:16,954
Freddy Bender, this is Rex Rexroth.
And you are the lovely Marylin.
323
00:24:17,038 --> 00:24:20,875
Please, Ms. Rexroth.
And you must be Mr. Massey.
324
00:24:20,959 --> 00:24:23,586
Please, Miles. Sit. Sit down.
325
00:24:25,922 --> 00:24:29,717
Freddy, I was sorry to hear about
the Goldberger award. Pastry?
326
00:24:29,801 --> 00:24:31,218
(STIFLED SNIGGERING)
327
00:24:31,970 --> 00:24:36,098
We did very well.
We did very well.
328
00:24:36,183 --> 00:24:38,642
Not to worry, Mrs. Rexroth,
you're ably represented.
329
00:24:38,727 --> 00:24:42,438
I'm sure Freddy's just too modest to tell
you he used to clerk for Clarence Thomas.
330
00:24:42,522 --> 00:24:44,148
Pastry? Going begging.
331
00:24:44,232 --> 00:24:49,236
(STAMMERS) Don't try to bait me, Miles. Now if
you have a proposal to make, let's hear it.
332
00:24:49,321 --> 00:24:53,991
Well, at this point, my client is still
prepared to consider reconciliation.
333
00:24:55,619 --> 00:24:56,785
My client has ruled that out.
334
00:24:56,870 --> 00:24:59,371
My client is prepared to entertain
an amicable dissolution
335
00:24:59,456 --> 00:25:02,416
- of the marriage without prejudice.
- That's a fart in a stiff wind.
336
00:25:02,501 --> 00:25:04,835
My client proposes a
30-day cooling-off period.
337
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:07,004
My client feels
sufficiently dispassionate.
338
00:25:07,088 --> 00:25:09,173
My client asks that you
not initiate proceedings
339
00:25:09,257 --> 00:25:11,217
pending his setting
certain affairs in order.
340
00:25:11,343 --> 00:25:12,718
(BOTH LAUGHING)
341
00:25:13,136 --> 00:25:14,220
(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)
342
00:25:14,304 --> 00:25:17,765
- What's so goddamn funny?
- Please, let me handle this.
343
00:25:17,849 --> 00:25:21,894
All right. So much for the icebreakers.
What are you after, Freddy?
344
00:25:21,978 --> 00:25:25,147
My client is prepared to settle
for 50% of the marital assets.
345
00:25:27,817 --> 00:25:30,736
Why only 50, Freddy?
Why not 100?
346
00:25:30,820 --> 00:25:34,406
While we're dreaming, why not 150%?
Are you familiar with Kershner?
347
00:25:34,491 --> 00:25:35,616
Kershner does not apply.
348
00:25:35,700 --> 00:25:37,409
Bring this to trial,
we'll see if Kershner applies.
349
00:25:37,494 --> 00:25:39,495
- What's Kershner?
- Please, let me handle this.
350
00:25:39,579 --> 00:25:41,956
- Kershner was in Kentucky.
- Kershner was in Kentucky?
351
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:43,958
- Kershner was in Kentucky!
- All right, Freddy.
352
00:25:44,042 --> 00:25:47,962
- Forget Kershner. What's your bottom line?
- Primary residence, 30% of remaining assets.
353
00:25:48,046 --> 00:25:51,131
What are you, nuts?
Have you forgotten Kershner?
354
00:25:52,634 --> 00:25:56,554
- Freddy. It's a negotiation.
- FREDDY: See you at the preliminary.
355
00:25:56,638 --> 00:26:01,517
Freddy, we're all friends here.
It's a negotiation. Hey!
356
00:26:02,644 --> 00:26:06,355
Freddy! Fine.
We'll eat the pastry.
357
00:26:06,481 --> 00:26:07,815
(DOOR SLAMS)
358
00:26:15,991 --> 00:26:17,825
I thought that went well.
359
00:26:18,159 --> 00:26:19,994
(MUSIC PLAYING IN BACKGROUND)
360
00:26:20,704 --> 00:26:22,037
MAN 1: (CHUCKLING)
Oh, yeah.
361
00:26:23,164 --> 00:26:25,666
MAN 2:
Gus, you outdid yourself.
362
00:26:25,750 --> 00:26:27,501
(MEN CHUCKLING)
363
00:26:29,546 --> 00:26:32,339
- Let's go back to the football game.
- Kiss my ass.
364
00:26:32,424 --> 00:26:36,719
- It's halftime, man. This is some good shit.
- I'm about to nail his ass, right here.
365
00:26:36,803 --> 00:26:38,762
Oh, Gussy, go back to the
Rabinowitz tape again.
366
00:26:38,847 --> 00:26:40,306
Hold on. Now here
come the good part.
367
00:26:40,390 --> 00:26:41,473
- Look at this.
- (PHONE RINGING)
368
00:26:41,558 --> 00:26:45,102
- She about to take off her panties.
- Yeah. Come on, come on, come on.
369
00:26:45,186 --> 00:26:46,604
(LAUGHING)
370
00:26:46,688 --> 00:26:48,272
- WOMAN: Gus?
- Mmm-mmm. Yeah?
371
00:26:48,356 --> 00:26:50,774
- It's Miles Massey.
- Take a number.
372
00:26:50,859 --> 00:26:53,777
- WOMAN: It's about a job tonight.
- God damn it!
373
00:26:53,862 --> 00:26:54,862
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
374
00:26:54,946 --> 00:26:57,239
Shit, did you see that?
375
00:26:58,116 --> 00:27:00,117
(SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYING)
376
00:27:13,340 --> 00:27:15,549
MAITRE D:
Here we are.
377
00:27:16,426 --> 00:27:19,720
Ms. Rexroth. I am so delighted
you decided to come.
378
00:27:19,804 --> 00:27:24,850
- I must admit, I was curious.
- Something to start. Some wine, perhaps?
379
00:27:26,519 --> 00:27:27,936
- Red?
- French.
380
00:27:28,021 --> 00:27:29,605
- Bordeaux?
- Chateau Margaux.
381
00:27:29,689 --> 00:27:31,940
- '57?
- '59.
382
00:27:32,025 --> 00:27:34,902
- '54.
- Mr. Massey.
383
00:27:34,986 --> 00:27:36,236
MAITRE D:
Good, sir.
384
00:27:36,321 --> 00:27:37,613
Your husband had told me
385
00:27:37,697 --> 00:27:41,825
you were the most beautiful
woman that he'd ever met.
386
00:27:41,910 --> 00:27:45,996
I didn't expect the most
beautiful woman I'd ever met.
387
00:27:46,081 --> 00:27:49,958
"Dismiss your vows, your
feigned tears, your flattery."
388
00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:52,628
"For where a heart is hard,
they make no battery."
389
00:27:55,048 --> 00:27:59,301
"Who ever loved that loved
not at first sight?"
390
00:27:59,844 --> 00:28:03,972
Now you didn't ask me here to pick me up.
You could be disbarred for that.
391
00:28:04,057 --> 00:28:06,308
Maybe I'm reckless.
392
00:28:06,393 --> 00:28:08,234
What was your performance
about this afternoon?
393
00:28:08,311 --> 00:28:09,728
What did your lawyer say?
394
00:28:09,813 --> 00:28:13,982
Oh, Freddy thinks you're a buffoon.
He says you've been too successful.
395
00:28:14,067 --> 00:28:17,736
You're bored, complacent,
and you're on your way down.
396
00:28:17,821 --> 00:28:19,863
- But you don't think so.
- How do you know?
397
00:28:19,948 --> 00:28:21,990
- Why would you be here?
- Why did you ask me?
398
00:28:22,075 --> 00:28:23,492
- Can't I be curious?
- About what?
399
00:28:23,576 --> 00:28:26,036
- Do you ever answer questions?
- Do you?
400
00:28:26,121 --> 00:28:28,664
I'll have the tournedos of beef.
The lady will have the same. Thank you.
401
00:28:28,748 --> 00:28:30,749
Thank you, sir.
402
00:28:30,834 --> 00:28:33,127
I assume you're a carnivore.
403
00:28:33,211 --> 00:28:36,046
(CHUCKLES) Oh, Mr. Massey,
you have no idea.
404
00:28:36,131 --> 00:28:38,882
Miles, please.
405
00:28:38,967 --> 00:28:41,385
Tell me more about yourself.
406
00:28:41,469 --> 00:28:46,807
All right, Miles. Let me tell you
everything that you need to know.
407
00:28:46,891 --> 00:28:50,394
You may think you're tough, but I
eat men like you for breakfast.
408
00:28:50,478 --> 00:28:53,355
I've invested five good years
in my marriage to Rex,
409
00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:56,567
and I've nailed his
ass fair and square.
410
00:28:56,651 --> 00:28:59,111
Now I'm going to have
it stuffed, mounted,
411
00:28:59,195 --> 00:29:01,947
and have my lady friends come
over and throw darts at it.
412
00:29:02,031 --> 00:29:03,490
Man hater, huh?
413
00:29:04,909 --> 00:29:07,661
People don't go on safaris
'cause they hate animals.
414
00:29:07,746 --> 00:29:10,622
So it's just for the hunt
with the trophy at the end?
415
00:29:10,707 --> 00:29:12,916
No. Nothing so frivolous.
416
00:29:14,836 --> 00:29:19,798
This divorce means money.
Money means independence.
417
00:29:19,883 --> 00:29:22,384
That's what I'm after.
418
00:29:22,469 --> 00:29:24,678
What are you after, Miles?
419
00:29:24,763 --> 00:29:28,891
I'm a lot like you. Just
looking for an ass to mount.
420
00:29:31,644 --> 00:29:33,520
(WHISPERS)
Well, don't look at mine.
421
00:29:40,862 --> 00:29:42,279
(GUS GRUNTS)
422
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,576
Yeah. Two, three.
423
00:29:47,660 --> 00:29:49,244
(GRUNTING)
424
00:29:57,712 --> 00:29:58,879
(EXHALES)
425
00:30:02,467 --> 00:30:03,967
(DOGS BARKING)
426
00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:14,728
(LAUGHS)
427
00:30:14,813 --> 00:30:17,147
I got you. See this?
428
00:30:32,330 --> 00:30:33,330
Yeah?
429
00:30:34,749 --> 00:30:40,003
I'll just have a salad, please.
Baby field greens.
430
00:30:41,297 --> 00:30:42,464
What did you call me?
431
00:30:44,092 --> 00:30:46,885
No, I didn't call you anything.
432
00:30:46,970 --> 00:30:50,848
- You want a salad.
- Do you have a green salad?
433
00:30:50,932 --> 00:30:55,018
- What the fuck color would it be?
- Why are we eating here?
434
00:30:55,103 --> 00:30:56,895
MARGE:
What's his problem?
435
00:30:56,980 --> 00:30:59,982
Just bring him an iceberg lettuce
and a mealy tomato wedge
436
00:31:00,066 --> 00:31:02,234
smothered with French dressing.
437
00:31:02,318 --> 00:31:03,360
And for you?
438
00:31:03,444 --> 00:31:07,072
Ham sandwich on stale rye bread.
Lots of mayo, easy on the ham.
439
00:31:07,156 --> 00:31:09,283
- Slaw cup?
- What the hell.
440
00:31:09,367 --> 00:31:10,909
Hello, Marge.
441
00:31:10,994 --> 00:31:13,704
- How are you, Gus?
- I'm all right.
442
00:31:13,788 --> 00:31:18,083
Okay. Now, I minoxed
her address book.
443
00:31:18,167 --> 00:31:20,210
Don't call me anymore for
this penny-ante shit.
444
00:31:20,295 --> 00:31:24,798
- I shoot action. Me and the lkegami, Jack.
- Thank you, Gus.
445
00:31:24,883 --> 00:31:28,677
- And those Rottweilers were a menace, man.
- I told you she had dogs.
446
00:31:28,761 --> 00:31:32,180
Yeah. But you didn't tell me they
had a hard-on for anus africanus.
447
00:31:32,265 --> 00:31:35,225
Gus. Did you see any evidence?
448
00:31:35,310 --> 00:31:40,397
Any "telltale signs" of indiscretion
on the part of Ms. Rexroth?
449
00:31:40,481 --> 00:31:46,778
What are you talking about "telltale
signs"? Look, I see an ass, I nail it.
450
00:31:46,863 --> 00:31:50,490
I don't sneak around sniffing the sheets.
God damn it, I'm Gus Petch!
451
00:31:51,451 --> 00:31:54,912
- Couldn't you be disbarred for that?
- Oh, I don't think so.
452
00:31:54,996 --> 00:31:57,796
- Maybe if I'd had the patty melt.
- You had a guy break into her house
453
00:31:57,874 --> 00:32:00,250
- and photograph her address book.
- No, Wrigley.
454
00:32:00,335 --> 00:32:04,087
I happened to let a man know that I
was interested in her address book.
455
00:32:04,172 --> 00:32:05,172
That's not criminal.
456
00:32:05,214 --> 00:32:07,966
I also happened to let him know that
I was taking her out to dinner.
457
00:32:08,051 --> 00:32:13,013
That's not a crime either. No, I don't
see myself as culpable in any sense.
458
00:32:13,097 --> 00:32:15,265
You, on the other hand,
could be disbarred
459
00:32:15,350 --> 00:32:18,602
for developing and examining these
photos of her address book.
460
00:32:18,686 --> 00:32:22,022
But that doesn't
really concern me.
461
00:32:22,106 --> 00:32:26,568
- Right. Who are you looking for?
- Tenzing Norgay.
462
00:32:26,653 --> 00:32:30,572
Tenzing Norgay. That's
someone she slept with.
463
00:32:30,657 --> 00:32:32,950
I doubt it. Tenzing
Norgay was the Sherpa
464
00:32:33,034 --> 00:32:35,035
that helped Edmund Hillary
climb Mount Everest.
465
00:32:35,119 --> 00:32:37,245
And Marylin knows him.
466
00:32:37,330 --> 00:32:40,916
No, you idiot. Not the Tenzing Norgay.
Her Tenzing Norgay.
467
00:32:42,543 --> 00:32:44,002
I'm not sure that I
actually follow that.
468
00:32:44,087 --> 00:32:48,048
Few great accomplishments are
achieved single-handedly, Wrigley.
469
00:32:48,132 --> 00:32:50,175
Most have their Norgays.
470
00:32:50,259 --> 00:32:54,096
Marylin Rexroth is even
now climbing her Everest.
471
00:32:54,180 --> 00:32:55,389
I wanna find her Norgay.
472
00:32:55,473 --> 00:32:57,975
But how do you determine which
of the people on here are...
473
00:32:58,059 --> 00:33:00,602
- How do you spot a Norgay?
- Yeah.
474
00:33:00,687 --> 00:33:02,813
You start with the people
with the funny names.
475
00:33:02,897 --> 00:33:04,064
Oh, yea, oh yea!
476
00:33:04,148 --> 00:33:06,988
Family Court of the Fifth District of
Los Angeles County now in session.
477
00:33:07,026 --> 00:33:09,736
The Honorable Marva Munson presiding.
All rise.
478
00:33:17,078 --> 00:33:22,541
- Have you sat before her before?
- No. No, the judge sits first. Then we sit.
479
00:33:22,625 --> 00:33:25,752
- Well, have you sat after her before?
- "Sat after her before?"
480
00:33:25,837 --> 00:33:27,754
You mean, "Have we argued
before her before?"
481
00:33:27,839 --> 00:33:31,008
The judge sits in judgment. The
counsel argues before the judge.
482
00:33:31,092 --> 00:33:33,677
So have you argued
before her before?
483
00:33:33,761 --> 00:33:35,721
WRIGLEY: Before her before,
or before she sat before?
484
00:33:35,805 --> 00:33:36,888
REX:
Before her before.
485
00:33:36,973 --> 00:33:39,933
- I said, "Before her before."
- No, you said, "Before she sat before."
486
00:33:40,018 --> 00:33:41,977
- I did at first, but...
- Look, don't argue.
487
00:33:42,061 --> 00:33:44,187
- I'm not.
- No, you don't argue. We argue.
488
00:33:44,272 --> 00:33:45,605
- Counsel argues.
- You appear.
489
00:33:45,690 --> 00:33:47,024
- MILES: The judge sits.
- WRIGLEY: Then you sit.
490
00:33:47,108 --> 00:33:49,276
- MILES: Or you stand in contempt.
- And then we argue.
491
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:51,528
- The counsel argues.
- Which you've done before.
492
00:33:51,612 --> 00:33:54,072
- Which we've done before.
- Ah.
493
00:33:54,157 --> 00:33:55,282
But not before her.
494
00:33:59,412 --> 00:34:00,662
Rex. Sit.
495
00:34:00,747 --> 00:34:02,581
GUS: (ON TV) There it is!
I got it!
496
00:34:02,665 --> 00:34:04,041
(WOMAN SCREAMING ON TV)
497
00:34:04,125 --> 00:34:07,294
GUS: I'm gonna nail your ass.
I'm gonna nail your ass.
498
00:34:07,378 --> 00:34:09,796
I'm gonna nail your ass. Yeah!
499
00:34:09,881 --> 00:34:12,466
- I'm gonna nail your ass.
- REX: It's a silly misunderstanding.
500
00:34:12,550 --> 00:34:14,885
Get that thing off me now!
501
00:34:14,969 --> 00:34:16,511
- GUS: Yeah, I'm gonna nail your ass.
- (CRYING)
502
00:34:16,596 --> 00:34:20,932
I'm gonna nail your ass.
I'm gonna nail your ass.
503
00:34:31,194 --> 00:34:34,988
Devastated. Simply devastated.
504
00:34:36,324 --> 00:34:38,283
Thank you, Mrs. Rexroth.
505
00:34:41,079 --> 00:34:43,121
MUNSON:
Mr. Massey, any questions?
506
00:35:01,933 --> 00:35:03,350
(SNIFFLES)
507
00:35:13,986 --> 00:35:17,447
"Dismiss your vows, your
feigned tears, your flattery."
508
00:35:17,532 --> 00:35:20,325
"For where a heart is hard,
they make no battery."
509
00:35:20,409 --> 00:35:23,245
- Mrs. Rexroth, do you know those lines?
- Objection, Your Honor.
510
00:35:23,329 --> 00:35:26,998
- Grounds?
- Poetry recitation.
511
00:35:27,083 --> 00:35:33,797
Let me rephrase. Mrs. Rexroth, how
high is that wall around your heart?
512
00:35:33,881 --> 00:35:39,136
Your Honor, this is harassment,
and frankly, it's still a little arty-farty.
513
00:35:39,220 --> 00:35:41,429
Rephrase. Mrs. Rexroth,
have you ever been in love?
514
00:35:41,514 --> 00:35:43,557
Yes. Of course.
515
00:35:45,852 --> 00:35:47,435
With Rex.
516
00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:49,062
And you've always loved him?
517
00:35:50,398 --> 00:35:53,150
"Who ever loved that loved
not at first sight?"
518
00:35:55,570 --> 00:35:57,070
(SOBBING)
519
00:35:58,865 --> 00:36:02,993
So it's your sworn testimony
that you have loved Rex Rexroth
520
00:36:03,077 --> 00:36:04,870
since first you met?
521
00:36:07,874 --> 00:36:08,915
Yes.
522
00:36:11,502 --> 00:36:12,836
Thank you.
523
00:36:14,630 --> 00:36:16,339
No further questions,
Your Honor.
524
00:36:16,424 --> 00:36:19,342
- MUNSON: Who's next, Mr. Bender?
- FREDDY: We rest, Your Honor.
525
00:36:19,427 --> 00:36:21,052
Mr. Massey.
526
00:36:21,137 --> 00:36:24,264
Your Honor, I call Heinz,
the Baron Krauss von Espy.
527
00:36:25,099 --> 00:36:33,099
Heinz, the Baron
Krauss von Espy.
528
00:36:33,482 --> 00:36:35,734
- MAN 1: Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy!
- Problem?
529
00:36:35,818 --> 00:36:36,818
Puffy.
530
00:36:36,903 --> 00:36:40,113
- MAN 2: Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy!
- Tenzing Norgay.
531
00:37:02,386 --> 00:37:06,223
- Mr. Krauss, do you solemnly swear that...
- Krauss von Espy.
532
00:37:06,307 --> 00:37:10,185
- Mr. Krauss von Espy, do you solemnly...
- Baron Krauss von Espy.
533
00:37:10,269 --> 00:37:11,686
Solemnly swear that the
testimony you are about to give
534
00:37:11,771 --> 00:37:12,896
shall be the truth,
the whole truth
535
00:37:12,980 --> 00:37:14,022
nothing but the truth,
so help you God?
536
00:37:14,106 --> 00:37:15,148
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
537
00:37:15,233 --> 00:37:16,274
No maybes.
538
00:37:16,359 --> 00:37:17,734
(REPEATING IN FRENCH)
539
00:37:17,818 --> 00:37:18,902
But of course, yes.
540
00:37:18,986 --> 00:37:22,447
- The Baron does not lie.
- MUNSON: Have a seat, sir.
541
00:37:23,115 --> 00:37:25,533
- Did you sleep with him?
- Don't be a fool.
542
00:37:25,618 --> 00:37:26,618
(DOG YELPING)
543
00:37:26,702 --> 00:37:28,078
Shh. Elsbieta.
544
00:37:28,162 --> 00:37:29,621
(SHUSHING)
545
00:37:30,581 --> 00:37:33,959
Baron von Espy, what
is your profession?
546
00:37:34,043 --> 00:37:36,795
(LAUGHS) Silly man.
I am a baron.
547
00:37:36,879 --> 00:37:42,092
Yes, but do you not also hold a day
job, paying job, a square job?
548
00:37:42,176 --> 00:37:44,261
Well, one has to live.
549
00:37:44,345 --> 00:37:47,430
I am the concierge of
Les Pantalons Rouges
550
00:37:47,515 --> 00:37:50,684
at Bad-Gadesbourg in
the canton of Uri.
551
00:37:50,768 --> 00:37:53,270
And what does that job entail?
552
00:37:53,354 --> 00:37:56,606
I satisfy such requests as
the clientele may present.
553
00:37:56,691 --> 00:37:58,608
MILES:
Towels, ice, et cetera?
554
00:37:58,693 --> 00:38:00,735
We have bellmen for that.
No, no, no.
555
00:38:00,820 --> 00:38:05,282
Such requests that, were you at home,
you would address not to your valet,
556
00:38:05,366 --> 00:38:07,200
- but to your majordomo.
- (DOG GROWLING)
557
00:38:07,660 --> 00:38:08,660
(SHUSHING)
558
00:38:08,744 --> 00:38:11,579
I see. Baron, do you
recognize that woman?
559
00:38:12,290 --> 00:38:14,541
Chere Marylin. But of course.
560
00:38:14,625 --> 00:38:16,960
Look who is here. Hi!
561
00:38:17,044 --> 00:38:18,169
(LAUGHS)
562
00:38:18,462 --> 00:38:22,799
And she was a guest
of the Red Trousers?
563
00:38:23,634 --> 00:38:28,722
Oh, many times for relaxing
and making Alpine recreation.
564
00:38:29,890 --> 00:38:30,932
Mmm-hmm.
565
00:38:31,017 --> 00:38:35,478
I am curious about her visit of
five years ago. January, 1998.
566
00:38:36,605 --> 00:38:39,607
Can you remember any specific
request she made at that time?
567
00:38:39,692 --> 00:38:41,109
Yes, I can.
568
00:38:41,193 --> 00:38:44,321
And what, at that time,
did she tell you she required?
569
00:38:44,405 --> 00:38:49,242
She said that she
required a husband!
570
00:38:49,910 --> 00:38:51,369
(DOG BARKING)
571
00:38:51,871 --> 00:38:55,248
Do you want some bones, huh?
Does Elsbieta want some bones?
572
00:38:55,333 --> 00:38:57,208
Has anyone any bones?
573
00:38:57,293 --> 00:39:01,171
Does anyone have any bones?
Bones? Dog candies?
574
00:39:01,255 --> 00:39:05,300
No, they are not candies. Milk-Bones.
Hard, crunchy bones for the teeth.
575
00:39:05,384 --> 00:39:06,384
Hard...
576
00:39:06,469 --> 00:39:07,635
(MUNSON CLEARS THROAT)
577
00:39:08,971 --> 00:39:10,513
We'll attend to the dog later.
578
00:39:10,598 --> 00:39:13,391
Now, Baron... Where were we?
579
00:39:17,730 --> 00:39:19,689
"She said that she
required a husband."
580
00:39:19,774 --> 00:39:23,068
"Do you want some bones?
Does Elsbieta want some bones?"
581
00:39:23,152 --> 00:39:25,695
"Has anyone any bones? Hard,
crunchy bones for the..."
582
00:39:25,780 --> 00:39:26,946
Right.
583
00:39:27,031 --> 00:39:31,576
Now, a husband.
That's an unusual request.
584
00:39:31,660 --> 00:39:34,371
Did she specify what kind of a
husband she was looking for?
585
00:39:34,455 --> 00:39:35,997
- MARYLIN: (WHISPERS) Stop him.
- Objection.
586
00:39:36,082 --> 00:39:39,376
- Grounds?
- Hearsay.
587
00:39:39,460 --> 00:39:40,543
It's not secondhand, Your Honor.
588
00:39:40,628 --> 00:39:43,421
This is direct testimony about
the Baron's own conversation.
589
00:39:43,506 --> 00:39:44,839
I'm going to allow it.
590
00:39:44,924 --> 00:39:49,511
She said she wanted a
very rich husband.
591
00:39:49,595 --> 00:39:55,183
She wanted to know the businesses and
the wealths-es... The wealths-es.
592
00:39:55,267 --> 00:40:00,063
Can I say this? Wealths-es of
our various eligible guests.
593
00:40:00,147 --> 00:40:02,482
And did she have any
other specifications?
594
00:40:02,566 --> 00:40:05,944
- Objection, Your Honor. Inflammatory.
- What's good for the gander, Your Honor.
595
00:40:06,028 --> 00:40:08,238
Is this a legal argument.
"What's good for the gander"?
596
00:40:08,322 --> 00:40:09,406
You got to play
your tape, Freddy.
597
00:40:09,490 --> 00:40:12,367
Mr. Massey has a point there.
I'm going to allow it.
598
00:40:12,451 --> 00:40:15,036
Were there any other
specifications?
599
00:40:15,121 --> 00:40:18,081
She specificated a silly man.
600
00:40:18,165 --> 00:40:20,565
- FREDDY: Objection, Your Honor!
- MUNSON: I'm going to allow it.
601
00:40:20,626 --> 00:40:24,254
She specificated a man who,
though clever at making money,
602
00:40:24,338 --> 00:40:26,965
would be easily duped
and controlled.
603
00:40:27,049 --> 00:40:29,259
- Objection, Your Honor.
- Shut up, Freddy. She's allowing it.
604
00:40:29,343 --> 00:40:33,096
She specificated a man
with a wandering pee-pee.
605
00:40:33,180 --> 00:40:37,600
How you say? A philanderer whose affairs
would be transparent to the world.
606
00:40:37,685 --> 00:40:38,685
Objection, Your Honor!
607
00:40:38,769 --> 00:40:43,440
Finally, a man whom she could
herself brazenly cuckold
608
00:40:43,524 --> 00:40:45,984
until such time as she
might choose to...
609
00:40:46,068 --> 00:40:48,653
We would say, "Faire un coup
de marteau sur des fesses."
610
00:40:48,737 --> 00:40:51,656
You would say, "Make
hammer on his fanny."
611
00:40:51,740 --> 00:40:55,285
- Your Honor, objection! Irrelevant!
- I'm going to allow it!
612
00:40:55,369 --> 00:40:58,288
Tell us, Baron, did you
introduce her to such a man?
613
00:40:58,372 --> 00:41:00,540
Sir, I am the concierge!
614
00:41:00,624 --> 00:41:03,293
And to whom did you introduce
that calculating woman?
615
00:41:03,377 --> 00:41:07,380
I introduced her
to that silly man.
616
00:41:07,465 --> 00:41:08,465
(ALL GASPING)
617
00:41:08,549 --> 00:41:10,049
FREDDY:
Your Honor, objection!
618
00:41:10,134 --> 00:41:14,137
Let the record show that the Baron has
identified Rex Rexroth as the silly man!
619
00:41:14,221 --> 00:41:18,516
I did it! It was I! I introduced
her to that silly man!
620
00:41:18,601 --> 00:41:19,684
You son of a bitch!
621
00:41:19,768 --> 00:41:22,562
The red-faced angry one.
(LAUGHS) I introduced them!
622
00:41:22,938 --> 00:41:26,107
Absolutely! I did it! It was I!
623
00:41:26,192 --> 00:41:29,986
- I just love trains! I love trains!
- If you please, sir!
624
00:41:30,070 --> 00:41:31,488
(BOTH GRUNTING)
625
00:41:31,572 --> 00:41:34,407
I'm not sick! You're
the one who's sick!
626
00:41:36,243 --> 00:41:38,578
BARON: If you please,
sir, not the larynx!
627
00:41:38,662 --> 00:41:41,122
Objection, Your Honor!
Strangling the witness!
628
00:41:41,207 --> 00:41:43,082
I'm going to allow it.
629
00:41:43,167 --> 00:41:44,292
(GRUNTING)
630
00:41:45,836 --> 00:41:49,672
Well, I think it stinks.
They left you with nothing.
631
00:41:49,757 --> 00:41:52,675
Makes you wonder about
the entire legal system,
632
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:55,136
like Rodney what's-his-name.
633
00:41:55,221 --> 00:41:57,096
They bought Massey's argument.
634
00:41:57,181 --> 00:42:00,016
If I lied and cheated and was
with Rex only for his money,
635
00:42:00,100 --> 00:42:01,580
then he shouldn't
have to give me any.
636
00:42:01,602 --> 00:42:05,188
SARAH: Well, that makes no sense.
Why else would you put in all those years?
637
00:42:05,272 --> 00:42:06,564
(SARAH GROANS)
638
00:42:07,107 --> 00:42:10,527
- MARYLIN: Are you all right, Sarah?
- SARAH: (BREATHING HEAVILY) Yeah.
639
00:42:10,611 --> 00:42:14,197
- MARYLIN: What is it?
- SARAH: Peptic ulcer.
640
00:42:14,281 --> 00:42:18,326
I have medication, but I can't
take it before elective surgery.
641
00:42:19,119 --> 00:42:20,245
(SIGHS)
642
00:42:20,454 --> 00:42:24,499
- You shouldn't be living here alone, Sarah.
- My goddamn husbands gave me the ulcer.
643
00:42:24,583 --> 00:42:27,460
But a bottle of Bromo
can't love you back.
644
00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:31,214
Yeah. It's a catch-22.
645
00:42:31,298 --> 00:42:37,136
I have to admit, I don't like living alone.
I mean, do I need 46 rooms?
646
00:42:37,221 --> 00:42:40,723
- You could see people.
- It's risky. Palimony.
647
00:42:40,808 --> 00:42:44,018
Son of a bitch
Marvin Mitchelson.
648
00:42:44,103 --> 00:42:49,065
I'm telling you, honey, getting
laid is financial Russian roulette.
649
00:42:49,149 --> 00:42:53,570
Maybe I should just tear it
all down, build a cottage.
650
00:42:53,654 --> 00:42:55,530
More landscaping.
651
00:42:58,200 --> 00:43:02,745
Well, with my money, I can't
afford to be fooling around.
652
00:43:02,830 --> 00:43:05,748
And besides, I have you.
It'll be fun, just the girls.
653
00:43:05,833 --> 00:43:10,003
Well, thanks, Sarah, but I can't
sleep on your couch forever.
654
00:43:11,380 --> 00:43:15,550
I'm going to marry again,
nail the guy's ass good.
655
00:43:17,052 --> 00:43:20,346
And this time, there'll
be no Puffy von Espy.
656
00:43:33,360 --> 00:43:37,322
MARYLIN: Knock, knock. Excuse me.
Mr. Donaly?
657
00:43:37,406 --> 00:43:39,991
- Mr. Donaly?
- (SNORTS)
658
00:43:40,075 --> 00:43:41,951
Mr. Donaly, excuse me.
659
00:43:43,537 --> 00:43:46,497
- You are Donovan Donaly?
- I'm in a meeting.
660
00:43:46,582 --> 00:43:49,500
Mr. Donaly. I need a name.
661
00:43:53,213 --> 00:43:54,380
(CLICKS TONGUE)
662
00:43:55,090 --> 00:43:58,926
And of course, we will have to litigate.
Sentence, paragraph.
663
00:44:00,179 --> 00:44:05,350
Naturally, the first concern for both parties
is the welfare of little Wendell Junior.
664
00:44:05,434 --> 00:44:08,978
Nevertheless, we do question
whether the continuing expenses
665
00:44:09,063 --> 00:44:11,606
for his special ed classes are truly
justified, given the great strides...
666
00:44:11,690 --> 00:44:12,690
(INTERCOM BEEPS)
667
00:44:12,775 --> 00:44:16,361
WOMAN: (ON INTERCOM) Mr. Massey,
the senior partner would like to see you.
668
00:44:17,696 --> 00:44:20,365
- Herb wants to see me?
- If you have a moment.
669
00:44:52,773 --> 00:44:53,815
Oh!
670
00:44:54,358 --> 00:44:57,777
HERB: Fourteen summary
judgments sought.
671
00:44:58,904 --> 00:45:00,154
Thirteen granted.
672
00:45:00,239 --> 00:45:01,572
(WHEEZES)
673
00:45:02,449 --> 00:45:07,036
Eighteen movements to void
for respondent's prejudice.
674
00:45:07,121 --> 00:45:08,871
Eighteen granted.
675
00:45:08,956 --> 00:45:12,917
Twelve court days on the
Rexroth case alone.
676
00:45:13,001 --> 00:45:14,293
(WHEEZING)
677
00:45:14,461 --> 00:45:19,382
Three hundred and twenty billable
hours paralegal services.
678
00:45:19,466 --> 00:45:20,466
(WHEEZES)
679
00:45:21,969 --> 00:45:26,264
Six hundred and eighty billable
at full attorney rate.
680
00:45:26,348 --> 00:45:27,640
(WHEEZES)
681
00:45:29,268 --> 00:45:31,853
Eighty-five lunches charged.
682
00:45:31,937 --> 00:45:33,187
(LAUGHS)
683
00:45:33,272 --> 00:45:34,480
(GASPS)
684
00:45:50,664 --> 00:45:52,582
- (GASPS)
- Counselor,
685
00:45:54,376 --> 00:45:58,629
you are the engine
that drives this firm.
686
00:46:06,346 --> 00:46:07,388
(INTERCOM BEEPS)
687
00:46:07,473 --> 00:46:09,348
WOMAN: (ON INTERCOM)
Mr. Massey?
688
00:46:09,433 --> 00:46:12,894
Please, no calls. I'm
feeling a little fragile.
689
00:46:12,978 --> 00:46:15,521
I'm sorry, Mr. Massey, but I
felt certain you'd want to know.
690
00:46:15,606 --> 00:46:17,148
Marylin Rexroth
wants to see you.
691
00:46:17,232 --> 00:46:20,109
Marylin. (STAMMERS)
When did she...
692
00:46:20,194 --> 00:46:21,944
She's here now.
693
00:46:22,029 --> 00:46:25,114
Is she armed? (LAUGHS)
Give me a minute.
694
00:46:28,994 --> 00:46:30,203
(GARGLING)
695
00:46:35,918 --> 00:46:39,378
Marylin. How nice of you to...
696
00:46:40,547 --> 00:46:43,758
Marylin, shame on you.
(CHUCKLES)
697
00:46:44,885 --> 00:46:47,887
Marylin, what a lovely surprise.
698
00:46:51,016 --> 00:46:52,975
Marylin, what a...
699
00:46:53,060 --> 00:46:56,896
- Who the hell are you?
- Hello, Miles. So nice of you to see us.
700
00:47:00,234 --> 00:47:03,528
May I introduce
Howard D. Doyle of Doyle Oil.
701
00:47:03,612 --> 00:47:05,530
I'm goddamn pleased to meet you.
702
00:47:05,614 --> 00:47:08,074
Marylin here, she says you're the best.
Says you're aces.
703
00:47:08,158 --> 00:47:10,827
Well, thank you, Mr...
704
00:47:10,911 --> 00:47:15,414
Any relation to
John D. Doyle of Doyle Oil?
705
00:47:15,499 --> 00:47:18,835
Oh, you must be talking about Grandpa John.
My papa's John D., too.
706
00:47:18,919 --> 00:47:21,504
The Deuce, we called him. You know,
kind of the rebel of the family.
707
00:47:21,588 --> 00:47:23,548
But they knocked off that
whole John D. Routine
708
00:47:23,632 --> 00:47:25,299
when they christened little
old yours truly here.
709
00:47:25,384 --> 00:47:27,510
Grandpa nearly had a stroke.
710
00:47:27,594 --> 00:47:30,388
He did have a stroke, but that was
later, during the labor activity in '52.
711
00:47:30,472 --> 00:47:33,975
The government stepped in.
They called it mediation.
712
00:47:34,059 --> 00:47:38,020
He called it incipient communism, you know,
and of course, that's when he had his stroke.
713
00:47:38,105 --> 00:47:41,357
Golly, the whole left side of his body
is as useless as tits on a boar hog.
714
00:47:41,441 --> 00:47:44,694
- He lingered in a vegetative state for years.
- Well, that is fascinating, Mr. Doyle.
715
00:47:44,778 --> 00:47:46,654
- What say we have a seat?
- A seat?
716
00:47:46,738 --> 00:47:50,199
Here Marylin's had me runnin' up
and down Rodeo Drive all day long.
717
00:47:50,284 --> 00:47:52,952
Kind of hit-and-run shoppin', you know.
Take no prisoners.
718
00:47:53,036 --> 00:47:56,122
Forced march kind of thing.
My God, my dogs are barkin'.
719
00:47:56,206 --> 00:47:57,832
We started out at
this little old place
720
00:47:57,916 --> 00:47:59,542
- right off of Wilshire...
- It's been quite a day.
721
00:47:59,626 --> 00:48:00,835
- Had pewter things.
- But anyway, Miles,
722
00:48:00,919 --> 00:48:06,674
I know you're busy, and you charge by the
hour, so I'll get straight to the point.
723
00:48:06,758 --> 00:48:09,677
Howard D. And I are
planning to marry.
724
00:48:13,557 --> 00:48:14,765
Well...
725
00:48:15,642 --> 00:48:18,060
Well, I suppose that
congratulations are in order.
726
00:48:18,145 --> 00:48:20,396
HOWARD: Well, thank you, Miles.
You know, the urge to wedlock
727
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:24,817
and form a lasting monogamous bond sanctified
by ritual, it's pert-near universal.
728
00:48:24,902 --> 00:48:28,404
As a matter of fact, it might be of some
interest to you, being in a related business.
729
00:48:28,488 --> 00:48:31,365
Even your indigenous Americans,
I believe it was your Cree, used to...
730
00:48:31,450 --> 00:48:35,661
Howard and I are here because I've
learned through bitter experience
731
00:48:35,746 --> 00:48:40,207
that when it comes to matrimony
and law, you are the very best.
732
00:48:40,292 --> 00:48:43,920
And as you are well aware,
my previous marriage
733
00:48:44,004 --> 00:48:48,549
ended in an unjustified
stain upon my reputation.
734
00:48:49,509 --> 00:48:54,055
My motives were impugned.
I was slandered in court.
735
00:48:54,139 --> 00:48:56,724
I was painted a harlot.
736
00:48:57,517 --> 00:49:00,394
- Oh, honey, you ain't no harlot.
- Oh, yes, honey.
737
00:49:00,479 --> 00:49:04,899
So it's my desire to remove
any trace of suspicion
738
00:49:04,983 --> 00:49:08,945
from the mind of my
dear Howard Doyle.
739
00:49:09,029 --> 00:49:10,780
Oh, honey, come on, now.
740
00:49:10,864 --> 00:49:12,949
I wish to execute a
prenuptial agreement.
741
00:49:13,033 --> 00:49:16,494
And I'm dead-set against it.
I mean, just anti the whole deal.
742
00:49:16,578 --> 00:49:20,331
Howard's lawyers prefer it.
I insist upon it.
743
00:49:20,415 --> 00:49:24,251
Oh, damn lawyers. No offense to the
present company or anything, you know.
744
00:49:24,336 --> 00:49:29,090
Now, is it my understanding that the
Massey prenup has never been penetrated?
745
00:49:29,174 --> 00:49:30,424
That is correct.
746
00:49:30,509 --> 00:49:34,303
Not to blow my own horn, but they devote
an entire semester to it at Harvard Law.
747
00:49:34,388 --> 00:49:36,472
They got a hell of a school up there.
Ain't no doubt about it.
748
00:49:36,556 --> 00:49:38,641
We donated that Doyle building
up there here a while back.
749
00:49:38,725 --> 00:49:39,725
MILES:
Mmm-hmm.
750
00:49:39,810 --> 00:49:43,187
Now, I myself went to Texas A&M.
I'm an Aggie.
751
00:49:43,271 --> 00:49:45,815
- Business?
- Tight end.
752
00:49:45,899 --> 00:49:48,693
And I had a fair amount of success
against the split-T defense.
753
00:49:48,777 --> 00:49:50,695
You see, when they line
up symmetrical thataway,
754
00:49:50,779 --> 00:49:52,488
it allows me to
buttonhook and, you know,
755
00:49:52,572 --> 00:49:54,865
do a down-and-in, and up-and-out
and different things,
756
00:49:54,950 --> 00:49:59,120
post pattern every now and then. Your
tight ends don't generally run a post.
757
00:49:59,204 --> 00:50:00,997
But if the QB calls
it, hell, I'm ready.
758
00:50:01,081 --> 00:50:02,373
- MILES: Interrupt for a second?
- Yeah.
759
00:50:02,457 --> 00:50:07,294
I wanna make sure that you both
understand what it is you're asking.
760
00:50:07,379 --> 00:50:11,215
The Massey prenup provides that in the
event of a dissolution of the marriage,
761
00:50:11,299 --> 00:50:13,050
for any reason,
762
00:50:13,135 --> 00:50:17,388
both parties will leave it with what
they brought in and earned during.
763
00:50:17,472 --> 00:50:20,891
No one can profit
from the marriage.
764
00:50:20,976 --> 00:50:23,561
The prenup protects
the wealthier party.
765
00:50:23,645 --> 00:50:28,232
Without it, that party is
exposed, a sitting duck.
766
00:50:29,693 --> 00:50:34,280
- Not a hell of a lot of romance in that.
- No, sir, there is not. No romance.
767
00:50:34,364 --> 00:50:36,866
More to the point,
no wriggle room.
768
00:50:36,950 --> 00:50:42,830
So are we sure that
this is what we want?
769
00:50:44,791 --> 00:50:46,542
Absolutely.
770
00:50:47,419 --> 00:50:51,005
It's my gift to Howard
for his peace of mind.
771
00:50:52,132 --> 00:50:55,885
Whether or not he's worried
about it at this moment.
772
00:50:55,969 --> 00:50:58,804
Oh, honey pie,
do I look worried?
773
00:51:03,018 --> 00:51:04,185
Excuse me, Mr. Doyle.
774
00:51:04,269 --> 00:51:07,438
Could I just borrow your
charming fiancée for a moment?
775
00:51:07,522 --> 00:51:10,399
Well, okay. You gonna
leave a deposit?
776
00:51:10,484 --> 00:51:11,776
(ALL LAUGHING)
777
00:51:16,782 --> 00:51:18,949
What are you up to?
778
00:51:19,034 --> 00:51:23,662
Something you won't understand, Miles.
Howard and I are very much in love.
779
00:51:23,747 --> 00:51:26,123
I don't know what you're thinking,
but I have to warn you,
780
00:51:26,208 --> 00:51:28,793
the Massey prenup has
never been penetrated.
781
00:51:28,877 --> 00:51:32,505
You sign the prenup,
you can't get his money.
782
00:51:32,589 --> 00:51:34,507
Thanks for the
professional help.
783
00:51:34,591 --> 00:51:40,721
Marylin, think of me for a moment,
not as an attorney but as a friend.
784
00:51:40,806 --> 00:51:43,599
Does that mean you won't be
charging us for the hour?
785
00:51:43,683 --> 00:51:46,644
Dump him.
You can't nail his ass.
786
00:51:49,272 --> 00:51:50,397
Is that all?
787
00:51:52,359 --> 00:51:54,068
No, that's not all.
788
00:52:11,670 --> 00:52:14,797
I could have you
disbarred for that.
789
00:52:14,881 --> 00:52:16,382
It was worth it.
790
00:52:18,760 --> 00:52:20,886
A romantic divorce attorney.
791
00:52:26,601 --> 00:52:28,727
You fascinate me.
792
00:52:36,736 --> 00:52:40,573
MILES: I'll get right on it.
I'll whip something up.
793
00:52:40,657 --> 00:52:42,449
All right. Thank you.
794
00:52:43,451 --> 00:52:46,579
- How's Lionel?
- MILES: He's fine.
795
00:52:46,663 --> 00:52:51,709
He asked me to deliver the keynote address
at this year's convention in Vegas.
796
00:52:51,793 --> 00:52:54,086
- That's quite an honor.
- MILES: I suppose.
797
00:52:54,171 --> 00:52:57,089
- On top of a great victory.
- What was that?
798
00:52:57,174 --> 00:53:00,426
"What was that"? Rex Rexroth?
799
00:53:00,510 --> 00:53:04,096
He kept everything? You win? No compromise?
Isn't that what you wanted?
800
00:53:04,764 --> 00:53:05,931
(SIGHS)
801
00:53:07,601 --> 00:53:10,895
Oh, good God, Miles.
What are you looking for?
802
00:53:12,105 --> 00:53:13,606
I don't know.
803
00:53:16,109 --> 00:53:17,526
Okay, I won.
804
00:53:19,154 --> 00:53:21,280
What then?
805
00:53:21,364 --> 00:53:24,033
How many cases has
Herb Myerson won?
806
00:53:24,117 --> 00:53:26,368
The old man? More than anybody.
He's a legend.
807
00:53:26,453 --> 00:53:28,996
And look at him.
He's 87 years old.
808
00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:32,875
He's the first one into the office
in the morning. No home life.
809
00:53:32,959 --> 00:53:34,710
Who needs a home when you
have a colostomy bag?
810
00:53:34,794 --> 00:53:37,504
She can't really love
this dope, can she?
811
00:53:37,589 --> 00:53:41,175
- Who? Who loves who?
- Marylin Rexroth.
812
00:53:41,259 --> 00:53:45,137
She signed a prenup for
an oil millionaire.
813
00:53:46,306 --> 00:53:49,516
A Massey prenup?
814
00:53:52,062 --> 00:53:56,482
- Yeah.
- Well, then she is not after his money.
815
00:53:58,443 --> 00:54:02,071
Only love is in mind if
the Massey is signed.
816
00:54:06,826 --> 00:54:09,036
(APRIL COME SHE WILL PLAYING)
817
00:54:13,375 --> 00:54:18,629
(SINGING)
♪ April, come she will. ♪
818
00:54:20,173 --> 00:54:24,009
♪ When streams are ripe ♪
♪ and swelled with rain. ♪
819
00:54:25,345 --> 00:54:28,847
♪ May, she will stay. ♪
820
00:54:30,892 --> 00:54:32,810
♪ Resting in my arms again ♪
821
00:54:32,894 --> 00:54:33,978
(CRYING)
822
00:54:45,532 --> 00:54:46,991
What the hell's wrong with you?
823
00:54:47,826 --> 00:54:52,371
♪ April, come she will. ♪
824
00:54:58,044 --> 00:55:00,713
Thank you for coming
to this celebration
825
00:55:00,797 --> 00:55:04,967
of the love between our two
friends, Marylin and Howard.
826
00:55:05,051 --> 00:55:07,136
In today's cynical world,
827
00:55:07,220 --> 00:55:13,267
it's so hard to take that great leap of
faith aboard the ship of love and caring.
828
00:55:13,351 --> 00:55:17,104
But today Marylin and
Howard are taking that leap
829
00:55:17,188 --> 00:55:19,315
and telling us, their friends,
830
00:55:19,399 --> 00:55:24,278
that they do believe, that they
do have faith, that they do love.
831
00:55:25,155 --> 00:55:28,449
Do you, Howard Drexler
Doyle, take Marylin
832
00:55:28,533 --> 00:55:31,285
to be your shipmate on
this journey through life,
833
00:55:31,369 --> 00:55:35,831
through gale and doldrum,
seas choppy, wild, and calm?
834
00:55:35,915 --> 00:55:37,995
- HOWARD: Yes, I do, Father Scott.
- (WRIGLEY CRYING)
835
00:55:38,001 --> 00:55:42,629
And do you, Marylin Rexroth, take Howard
to be your shipmate and companion
836
00:55:42,714 --> 00:55:47,092
to ports of every clime, be it
in first class or steerage?
837
00:55:48,511 --> 00:55:49,762
MARYLIN:
I do.
838
00:55:49,846 --> 00:55:52,848
SCOTT: Then, by the power vested
in me by the State of California,
839
00:55:52,932 --> 00:55:55,642
and as captain of the
good ship Amore Veritas,
840
00:55:55,727 --> 00:55:58,187
I now pronounce
you man and wife.
841
00:56:09,199 --> 00:56:10,657
(SOBBING)
842
00:56:19,125 --> 00:56:20,876
What do you think?
843
00:56:20,960 --> 00:56:24,213
- MILES: What are they, ladles?
- Berry spoons.
844
00:56:24,297 --> 00:56:25,714
- Spoons?
- Berry spoons.
845
00:56:25,799 --> 00:56:28,467
- Everybody has spoons.
- And nobody needs berry spoons.
846
00:56:28,551 --> 00:56:30,886
- Everybody eats berries.
- Who are you, Pollyanna?
847
00:56:30,970 --> 00:56:33,764
- HOWARD: Hey, everybody! Folks! Hey, y'all!
- MILES: Where'd you see them at?
848
00:56:33,848 --> 00:56:36,392
A Martha Stewart catalog right
next to the silver napkin rings?
849
00:56:36,476 --> 00:56:38,894
- HOWARD: I need your attention for a minute.
- Stadium-seat ass-warmers?
850
00:56:38,978 --> 00:56:42,147
Dear God, Wrigley, how many cockamamie
personal possessions do we have to amass?
851
00:56:42,232 --> 00:56:43,273
Miles, why so angry?
852
00:56:43,358 --> 00:56:45,484
Now, I know it's not
common practice
853
00:56:45,568 --> 00:56:49,238
for the groom to give his bride
a gift on their wedding day.
854
00:56:49,322 --> 00:56:53,534
But ever since I met Marylin there,
I can't seem to quit givin' her things.
855
00:56:53,660 --> 00:56:55,202
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)
856
00:56:55,412 --> 00:56:58,997
And I don't wanna stop 'cause
it feels so darn good!
857
00:56:59,082 --> 00:57:00,124
(PEOPLE APPLAUDING)
858
00:57:00,208 --> 00:57:02,751
Chow Sing, bring that barbecue
sauce over here, little buddy.
859
00:57:02,836 --> 00:57:04,586
There you go.
860
00:57:04,671 --> 00:57:07,673
Put that thing on my neck now.
861
00:57:07,757 --> 00:57:11,718
Now, honey, it's like the padre said.
I want love and trust between us.
862
00:57:11,803 --> 00:57:14,430
Love, and trust, and
not a thing else.
863
00:57:14,514 --> 00:57:17,599
And this here deed that
I'm fixin' to perform.
864
00:57:20,562 --> 00:57:22,855
Well, honey, let me just...
865
00:57:26,025 --> 00:57:27,484
You see this?
866
00:57:34,659 --> 00:57:35,742
(ALL LAUGHING)
867
00:57:35,827 --> 00:57:40,414
This is for you, darling.
This here is for you.
868
00:57:40,498 --> 00:57:41,707
(CROWD APPLAUDING)
869
00:57:41,875 --> 00:57:46,545
This here is for you, baby.
Every last little speck of it.
870
00:57:46,629 --> 00:57:51,425
I love you. I mean,
I love you like a son of a bitch!
871
00:57:53,386 --> 00:57:56,221
I trust you!
872
00:57:56,306 --> 00:57:58,807
- This here is for you, baby.
- Brilliant!
873
00:57:58,892 --> 00:58:00,642
Baby, this is for you.
874
00:58:00,727 --> 00:58:02,686
- What is it?
- HOWARD: I really love you.
875
00:58:02,770 --> 00:58:04,521
It's the prenup.
876
00:58:05,231 --> 00:58:09,109
I love her! I trust her!
877
00:58:09,194 --> 00:58:10,914
- Ladies and gentlemen...
- It's the prenup!
878
00:58:10,987 --> 00:58:13,864
- HOWARD: I trust her!
- (LAUGHS) Brilliant!
879
00:58:17,785 --> 00:58:19,453
You look so beautiful.
880
00:58:19,537 --> 00:58:23,832
Ladies, if you'll excuse us.
We have to talk.
881
00:58:24,626 --> 00:58:29,671
I would like to offer my congratulations.
It was a beautiful gesture of Howard's.
882
00:58:29,756 --> 00:58:34,718
Well, Howard is a beautiful person.
A diamond in the rough.
883
00:58:34,802 --> 00:58:37,054
And I have a feeling
that someday soon,
884
00:58:37,138 --> 00:58:40,349
you'll be taking that diamond
and leaving the rough.
885
00:58:40,433 --> 00:58:44,520
In a month or so, once I've established
that I've tried to make the marriage work.
886
00:58:44,604 --> 00:58:48,023
- May I offer my services?
- Oh, thanks.
887
00:58:48,608 --> 00:58:52,152
But, no. No, I'm
retaining Freddy Bender.
888
00:58:52,237 --> 00:58:54,988
Poor Freddy. He was awfully
blue after my last divorce.
889
00:58:55,073 --> 00:58:56,740
Well, I admire your loyalty.
890
00:58:56,824 --> 00:58:58,867
To lawyers, anyway.
891
00:58:58,952 --> 00:59:02,079
I guess without the prenup, it's
something that even Freddy could manage.
892
00:59:02,163 --> 00:59:07,042
But how did you get Howard to do it?
It felt like it was his idea.
893
00:59:07,126 --> 00:59:09,878
Surely, Mr. Massey, you've
addressed enough juries
894
00:59:09,963 --> 00:59:12,839
to appreciate the
power of suggestion.
895
00:59:12,924 --> 00:59:14,049
Mmm.
896
00:59:15,468 --> 00:59:17,302
(MAN SINGING IN DISTANCE)
897
00:59:17,762 --> 00:59:21,265
Look, now that the
marriage is winding down,
898
00:59:22,225 --> 00:59:24,893
have dinner with me.
899
00:59:24,978 --> 00:59:30,315
No. No, nothing doing until the
ink is dry on the settlement.
900
00:59:30,400 --> 00:59:34,444
Oh, this'll be no settlement.
If I know Marylin Rexroth,
901
00:59:34,529 --> 00:59:40,033
this'll be nothing short of a
complete and total annihilation.
902
00:59:59,095 --> 01:00:01,597
- You're gonna win.
- Excuse me?
903
01:00:01,681 --> 01:00:05,350
I can always tell, going
to Vegas, who's gonna win.
904
01:00:05,435 --> 01:00:08,228
Well, thanks, but I'm
going on business.
905
01:00:09,230 --> 01:00:10,689
I always win.
906
01:00:13,151 --> 01:00:14,359
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
907
01:00:26,956 --> 01:00:29,958
You know why I hate this town, Wrigley?
You see, people get to Las Vegas,
908
01:00:30,043 --> 01:00:32,961
and all of a sudden, the rules of
the moral universe don't apply.
909
01:00:33,046 --> 01:00:35,505
When God is dead, all
things are possible.
910
01:00:35,590 --> 01:00:37,466
I saw an ad in the paper,
911
01:00:37,550 --> 01:00:42,763
"No-fault divorce. Two-week
divorce without a lawyer."
912
01:00:42,847 --> 01:00:46,141
Made me sick to my stomach.
"No-fault divorce."
913
01:00:46,225 --> 01:00:49,519
Good God. Talk about
your oxymoron.
914
01:00:49,604 --> 01:00:52,356
- What's the world coming to?
- One man can only do so much.
915
01:00:52,440 --> 01:00:55,317
One man... What are
you talking about?
916
01:00:55,401 --> 01:00:56,777
Freddy.
917
01:00:56,903 --> 01:00:58,570
WRIGLEY: Mmm. I had lunch
with Freddy Bender yesterday.
918
01:00:58,655 --> 01:01:02,032
He tells me that Marylin Rexroth-Doyle
is now richer than Croesus.
919
01:01:02,116 --> 01:01:05,452
Ah, yes, but is she richer than
Mrs. Croesus?
920
01:01:05,536 --> 01:01:08,622
She could buy and sell
you 10 times over.
921
01:01:10,166 --> 01:01:12,000
My God, is that her?
922
01:01:12,085 --> 01:01:13,168
Mmm.
923
01:01:13,586 --> 01:01:17,172
Freddy said she was flying in with him.
Celebrating, I guess.
924
01:01:17,256 --> 01:01:20,759
I'm fascinated by that creature.
Richer than me, huh?
925
01:01:20,843 --> 01:01:25,430
Well, she deserves every penny.
And now she's single again.
926
01:01:26,599 --> 01:01:28,350
Excuse me.
927
01:01:28,434 --> 01:01:30,769
No, you should stay
away from her, Miles.
928
01:01:30,853 --> 01:01:33,271
Recite your keynote address.
Take a cold shower.
929
01:01:41,030 --> 01:01:44,741
- You're looking well, Marylin.
- Hello, Miles.
930
01:01:44,826 --> 01:01:48,203
Obscene wealth becomes you.
931
01:01:48,287 --> 01:01:51,707
- I should've known you'd be here.
- Be here?
932
01:01:51,791 --> 01:01:54,668
- I'm the keynote speaker.
- How nice for you.
933
01:01:54,752 --> 01:01:57,879
- "Nailing Your Spouse's Assets."
- Excuse me?
934
01:01:57,964 --> 01:01:59,423
My speech.
935
01:01:59,507 --> 01:02:00,674
Oh!
936
01:02:02,301 --> 01:02:06,304
- Oh, I'm sure you'll bring the house down.
- It's an easy crowd.
937
01:02:06,389 --> 01:02:09,391
At this point, I would think
you're probably the only person
938
01:02:09,475 --> 01:02:12,352
- that I can't teach anything to.
- Really?
939
01:02:12,437 --> 01:02:13,603
Mmm.
940
01:02:13,855 --> 01:02:18,108
Now, correct me, but since
by now the ink must be dry,
941
01:02:18,192 --> 01:02:21,611
- I believe I have the right to collect.
- On?
942
01:02:21,696 --> 01:02:24,948
You promised to have dinner
with me once you were free.
943
01:02:25,032 --> 01:02:29,119
I said I wouldn't whilst I wasn't,
which implies no promise once I am.
944
01:02:29,203 --> 01:02:31,788
Noted. Let me rephrase.
945
01:02:31,873 --> 01:02:36,334
I would be delighted, honored
really, if you'd... (GASPS)
946
01:02:38,004 --> 01:02:39,838
- Howard!
- Howard!
947
01:02:39,922 --> 01:02:41,298
Howard!
948
01:02:41,382 --> 01:02:42,549
(LAUGHING)
949
01:02:42,675 --> 01:02:46,720
- You named him after your ex.
- I'm sentimental.
950
01:02:46,804 --> 01:02:52,851
Well, I'm free this evening, so I suppose
a little dinner would do no harm.
951
01:02:52,935 --> 01:02:56,188
Le Veuve Clicquot
Ponsardin 1990, sir.
952
01:02:56,272 --> 01:02:59,816
Yes. Thank you.
I'll take care of it.
953
01:03:01,527 --> 01:03:05,197
Marylin, this is a
moment to savor.
954
01:03:05,865 --> 01:03:10,619
Yes, we were adversaries,
but we were also professionals.
955
01:03:12,205 --> 01:03:16,625
So let us raise a
glass to friendship.
956
01:03:19,420 --> 01:03:20,796
To victory.
957
01:03:25,885 --> 01:03:29,221
So how does it feel?
958
01:03:30,765 --> 01:03:33,433
- Sorry?
- Victory. Independence.
959
01:03:33,810 --> 01:03:34,976
Oh.
960
01:03:38,064 --> 01:03:41,900
- Well, frankly, Miles...
- It's not everything you'd hoped for?
961
01:03:46,489 --> 01:03:47,864
I know the feeling.
962
01:03:49,325 --> 01:03:52,619
Independence. Two-edged sword.
963
01:03:54,664 --> 01:03:57,582
My friend... My best
friend, Sarah Sorkin.
964
01:03:59,252 --> 01:04:02,295
Sarah
Battista-O'Flanagan-Sorkin?
965
01:04:02,380 --> 01:04:05,090
The O'Flanagan settlement?
966
01:04:07,635 --> 01:04:09,094
- Ah.
- Hmm.
967
01:04:11,264 --> 01:04:13,682
Anyway, three fine settlements.
968
01:04:13,766 --> 01:04:16,142
More money than she could
ever hope to spend.
969
01:04:16,227 --> 01:04:18,436
- Yes.
- Her vaunted independence.
970
01:04:18,521 --> 01:04:21,189
Don't tell me.
She sits around the house,
971
01:04:21,274 --> 01:04:23,984
afraid to see people, afraid to
put her portfolio into play.
972
01:04:24,068 --> 01:04:28,446
And only a peptic ulcer to
keep her warm at night.
973
01:04:28,531 --> 01:04:29,614
Yes.
974
01:04:31,284 --> 01:04:35,412
There's a certain point when
you've achieved your goals.
975
01:04:35,496 --> 01:04:39,457
You realize that you're
still not satisfied.
976
01:04:39,542 --> 01:04:40,625
Yes.
977
01:04:48,885 --> 01:04:49,926
We should order.
978
01:04:52,013 --> 01:04:55,640
You know, I'm not really hungry.
979
01:04:56,475 --> 01:04:57,976
Neither am I.
980
01:05:22,668 --> 01:05:23,835
(SHUSHING)
981
01:05:41,354 --> 01:05:44,731
HERB: Eighteen hundred
billable hours.
982
01:05:44,815 --> 01:05:48,860
Twelve hundred twenty-one
motions to void.
983
01:05:50,529 --> 01:05:54,783
Five hundred and sixty-four
summary judgments.
984
01:05:56,202 --> 01:05:58,954
A hundred and
twenty-nine thousand
985
01:05:59,038 --> 01:06:03,083
nine hundred and ninety-nine
lunches charged.
986
01:06:03,709 --> 01:06:04,709
(LAUGHS)
987
01:06:05,044 --> 01:06:06,419
(PANTING)
988
01:06:09,173 --> 01:06:10,465
(PHONE RINGING)
989
01:06:20,685 --> 01:06:24,062
- Hello?
- MARYLIN: (CRYING) Miles?
990
01:06:24,146 --> 01:06:26,356
Hello? Marylin?
991
01:06:26,440 --> 01:06:28,942
Sarah Sorkin just died!
992
01:06:31,696 --> 01:06:34,489
- Marylin!
- Her ulcer.
993
01:06:36,867 --> 01:06:41,204
- Perforated. Infection.
- Yes.
994
01:06:43,374 --> 01:06:47,419
- Miles?
- Yes, Marylin?
995
01:06:47,503 --> 01:06:49,879
She was alone.
996
01:06:49,964 --> 01:06:54,968
She'd been dead for two days before
her Pilates instructor found her.
997
01:06:57,972 --> 01:07:02,183
Marylin, listen to me. No arguments.
No discussions.
998
01:07:02,268 --> 01:07:04,509
I'll have Wrigley meet us at
the Wee Kirk o' the Heather.
999
01:07:10,192 --> 01:07:11,234
Wrigley!
1000
01:07:11,318 --> 01:07:13,153
The vows are from an Arapaho
dawn-greeting ceremony.
1001
01:07:13,237 --> 01:07:17,449
The music is Simon & Garfunkel.
And this is the Massey prenup.
1002
01:07:18,117 --> 01:07:21,995
- You the two getting married?
- Mr. MacKinnon here will be officiating.
1003
01:07:22,079 --> 01:07:24,456
- Sorry. Short notice.
- Pen.
1004
01:07:24,540 --> 01:07:28,001
Marylin, you're welcome
to examine this.
1005
01:07:28,085 --> 01:07:31,755
This is the Massey prenup.
1006
01:07:31,839 --> 01:07:34,799
- As you know, it's ironclad.
- We tried to reach Freddy Bender.
1007
01:07:34,884 --> 01:07:37,093
We tried to reach Freddy Bender to
have him here for your protection,
1008
01:07:37,178 --> 01:07:39,304
- but we couldn't find him.
- (WHISPERS) I couldn't get him.
1009
01:07:39,388 --> 01:07:41,264
Are you two here to get
married or to bullshit?
1010
01:07:41,348 --> 01:07:44,142
So you can't hope to
benefit from the marriage?
1011
01:07:44,226 --> 01:07:45,727
Not in any way.
1012
01:07:45,811 --> 01:07:49,105
And my wealth is completely,
completely protected?
1013
01:07:49,190 --> 01:07:52,484
As if a lead veil had
been drawn across it.
1014
01:07:56,363 --> 01:07:57,822
(SIGNING)
1015
01:08:00,951 --> 01:08:04,245
- Do you still want to marry me?
- More than ever.
1016
01:08:04,330 --> 01:08:05,622
(WRIGLEY SNIFFLING)
1017
01:08:07,500 --> 01:08:09,501
Are you renting kilts?
1018
01:08:10,169 --> 01:08:12,587
(WEDDING MARCH PLAYING)
1019
01:08:26,227 --> 01:08:27,393
(MUSIC STOPS)
1020
01:08:27,478 --> 01:08:30,688
Do you, Miles Longfellow Massey
1021
01:08:30,773 --> 01:08:35,193
of Massey, Myerson, Sloan
and Gurolnick, LLP,
1022
01:08:35,277 --> 01:08:40,698
take Marylin Hamilton-Rexroth-Doyle
to be your lawful wedded wife?
1023
01:08:40,783 --> 01:08:42,742
I do. Yes. I do. I do.
1024
01:08:42,827 --> 01:08:47,205
Let me finish. Jesus, have you
never been married before?
1025
01:08:48,082 --> 01:08:52,377
To have and to hold, to love and to
cherish, till death do you part?
1026
01:08:55,714 --> 01:08:56,965
I do.
1027
01:08:57,049 --> 01:09:01,136
And do you, Marylin
Hamilton-Rexroth-Doyle,
1028
01:09:01,220 --> 01:09:05,140
take Miles Longfellow Massey to
be your lawful wedded husband,
1029
01:09:05,224 --> 01:09:10,353
to have and to hold, to love and to
cherish, till death do you part?
1030
01:09:10,437 --> 01:09:14,190
- I do.
- I now pronounce you man and wife.
1031
01:09:21,907 --> 01:09:23,283
(BAGPIPES PLAYING)
1032
01:09:47,224 --> 01:09:49,434
MILES: I'll take
care of you later.
1033
01:09:51,187 --> 01:09:52,312
(MARYLIN GIGGLING)
1034
01:10:00,112 --> 01:10:03,364
No, no, no, no, no. No.
This is all wrong.
1035
01:10:06,619 --> 01:10:07,785
Is it the kilt?
1036
01:10:08,621 --> 01:10:11,873
- Do you love me?
- More than anything.
1037
01:10:13,918 --> 01:10:17,587
- Can I trust you?
- Yes, you can trust me.
1038
01:10:26,931 --> 01:10:28,306
Darling, you're exposed.
1039
01:10:29,516 --> 01:10:30,767
A sitting duck.
1040
01:10:49,161 --> 01:10:50,995
I hereby declare
the 12th Congress
1041
01:10:51,080 --> 01:10:56,626
of the National Organization of
Matrimonial Attorneys Nationwide open.
1042
01:10:56,710 --> 01:10:58,419
As our first order of business,
1043
01:10:58,504 --> 01:11:02,298
it is a privilege to call to the
podium our keynote speaker.
1044
01:11:02,383 --> 01:11:07,178
From the Los Angeles firm of Massey,
Myerson, Sloan and Gurolnick,
1045
01:11:07,263 --> 01:11:12,934
a man whose name is synonymous with
bitter disputes and big awards,
1046
01:11:13,018 --> 01:11:14,227
Miles Massey.
1047
01:11:33,163 --> 01:11:34,205
Thank you, Branco.
1048
01:11:38,877 --> 01:11:40,545
In the world of...
1049
01:11:44,341 --> 01:11:47,385
In the world of matrimonial
law, there are...
1050
01:11:55,477 --> 01:11:59,314
In the world of matrimonial law,
there are multiple tactics.
1051
01:12:12,536 --> 01:12:13,953
(AUDIENCE MURMURING)
1052
01:12:16,749 --> 01:12:18,082
Friends,
1053
01:12:21,086 --> 01:12:24,088
this morning I stand before you
a very different Miles Massey
1054
01:12:24,173 --> 01:12:26,758
than the one that
addressed you last year
1055
01:12:26,842 --> 01:12:30,636
on the disposition of marital
assets following murder/suicide.
1056
01:12:30,721 --> 01:12:34,766
I wish to talk to you today not
about technical matters of law.
1057
01:12:36,810 --> 01:12:40,188
I wish to talk to you about
something more important.
1058
01:12:43,233 --> 01:12:45,568
I wish to talk to
you from the heart.
1059
01:12:51,116 --> 01:12:55,703
Because today, for the
first time in my life,
1060
01:12:57,081 --> 01:13:00,416
I stand before you naked,
1061
01:13:04,713 --> 01:13:06,089
vulnerable,
1062
01:13:09,134 --> 01:13:10,426
(SIGHS)
1063
01:13:11,136 --> 01:13:13,054
and in love.
1064
01:13:13,138 --> 01:13:14,722
(AUDIENCE MURMURING)
1065
01:13:20,312 --> 01:13:21,396
Love.
1066
01:13:23,357 --> 01:13:25,983
It's a word we matrimonial
lawyers avoid.
1067
01:13:27,361 --> 01:13:29,904
Funny, isn't it? We're
frightened of this emotion,
1068
01:13:29,988 --> 01:13:34,409
which is, in a sense,
the seed of our livelihood.
1069
01:13:34,493 --> 01:13:41,124
Well, today Miles Massey is here to tell
you that love need cause us no fear.
1070
01:13:44,253 --> 01:13:48,256
Love need cause us no shame.
Love is...
1071
01:13:50,175 --> 01:13:51,259
Good.
1072
01:13:57,182 --> 01:13:58,307
Love is good.
1073
01:13:58,392 --> 01:13:59,976
(AUDIENCE MURMURING)
1074
01:14:03,439 --> 01:14:04,814
Now I am, of course, aware
1075
01:14:04,898 --> 01:14:08,693
that these remarks will be
received here with cynicism.
1076
01:14:09,695 --> 01:14:13,239
Cynicism, that cloak that
advertises our indifference
1077
01:14:13,323 --> 01:14:15,533
and hides all human feeling.
1078
01:14:15,617 --> 01:14:19,078
Well, I'm here to tell you that that
cynicism which we think protects us,
1079
01:14:19,163 --> 01:14:21,873
in fact, destroys.
1080
01:14:21,957 --> 01:14:27,670
Destroys love, destroys our clients,
and, ultimately, destroys ourselves.
1081
01:14:27,754 --> 01:14:33,426
Colleagues, when our clients come to
us confused and angry and hurting
1082
01:14:33,510 --> 01:14:37,180
because their flame of love is
guttering and threatens to die,
1083
01:14:37,264 --> 01:14:39,557
do we seek to
extinguish that flame
1084
01:14:39,641 --> 01:14:43,478
so that we can sift through the smoldering
wreckage for our paltry reward?
1085
01:14:43,562 --> 01:14:46,314
Or do we fan this
precious flame,
1086
01:14:46,398 --> 01:14:51,360
this most precious flame, back
into loving, roaring life?
1087
01:14:51,445 --> 01:14:57,825
Do we counsel fear or trust?
Do we seek to destroy or build?
1088
01:14:57,910 --> 01:15:02,413
Do we meet our clients'
problems with cynicism
1089
01:15:04,458 --> 01:15:05,750
or with love?
1090
01:15:11,590 --> 01:15:14,300
The choice is, of
course, each of ours.
1091
01:15:16,428 --> 01:15:21,098
For my part, I've made the leap of
love, and there's no going back.
1092
01:15:21,934 --> 01:15:24,374
Ladies and gentlemen, this is the
last time I will address you
1093
01:15:24,394 --> 01:15:27,438
as the president of N.O.M.A.N.
or as a member.
1094
01:15:30,943 --> 01:15:35,863
I intend to devote myself to pro
bono work in East Los Angeles
1095
01:15:35,948 --> 01:15:37,281
or one of those other...
1096
01:15:42,913 --> 01:15:44,580
God bless you all.
1097
01:15:58,262 --> 01:16:00,137
(TENTATIVE APPLAUSE)
1098
01:16:08,647 --> 01:16:10,022
(APPLAUDING LOUDLY)
1099
01:16:14,444 --> 01:16:15,820
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1100
01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:35,506
I love you, man.
1101
01:16:49,813 --> 01:16:53,274
So, Wrigley, I'm gonna be relinquishing
my partnership in Massey Myerson.
1102
01:16:53,358 --> 01:16:57,278
If you care to join me in my new
endeavor, I'd be delighted.
1103
01:16:57,362 --> 01:16:59,905
Of course, I can't offer you the
same kind of financial remuneration
1104
01:16:59,990 --> 01:17:01,071
you've grown accustomed to,
1105
01:17:01,116 --> 01:17:02,825
but the work'll have to
serve as its own reward.
1106
01:17:02,909 --> 01:17:05,786
Barkeep, we'll have two
of your finest scotches.
1107
01:17:05,871 --> 01:17:08,122
- That's the...
- I propose a toast.
1108
01:17:08,206 --> 01:17:10,666
- MILES: Barkeep!
- That's the soap that used to belong to...
1109
01:17:10,751 --> 01:17:12,918
You'll be serving in a
junior capacity, of course.
1110
01:17:13,003 --> 01:17:14,503
Donovan Donaly.
1111
01:17:14,588 --> 01:17:16,964
Miles, that's...
(STAMMERING)
1112
01:17:17,049 --> 01:17:19,049
MILES: It'll be a small
operation, a boutique firm.
1113
01:17:19,092 --> 01:17:20,801
Let me tell you what they
called me in medical school.
1114
01:17:20,886 --> 01:17:23,054
MILES: In any firm, there
can be only one ramrod.
1115
01:17:23,138 --> 01:17:25,681
I don't see why my
leadership skills should...
1116
01:17:25,766 --> 01:17:27,892
- WRIGLEY: Howard?
- Mackenzie the Mechanical Marvel.
1117
01:17:27,976 --> 01:17:30,061
- WRIGLEY: It's Howard.
- You see, I have no nerves.
1118
01:17:30,145 --> 01:17:33,731
He's not an oil tycoon.
An actor.
1119
01:17:35,150 --> 01:17:37,318
Doctor, this is highly unusual.
1120
01:17:37,402 --> 01:17:40,780
WRIGLEY: So Marylin
married a soap actor.
1121
01:17:40,864 --> 01:17:45,326
So she's... She's poor.
1122
01:17:45,410 --> 01:17:48,829
Get yourself some clean scrubs,
and have them prepare the OR.
1123
01:17:48,914 --> 01:17:51,999
- Well, thank God you have the prenup.
- I have no prenup.
1124
01:17:52,084 --> 01:17:54,627
- You have no prenup.
- I have no prenup.
1125
01:17:54,711 --> 01:17:56,337
(DISTORTED VOICE)
You haVe no prenup.
1126
01:17:58,423 --> 01:17:59,882
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1127
01:18:06,682 --> 01:18:07,932
Thanks.
1128
01:18:09,351 --> 01:18:11,102
Okay.
1129
01:18:15,941 --> 01:18:18,901
- Marylin?
- Oh, hello, Miles.
1130
01:18:18,985 --> 01:18:20,277
(DOG SNARLING)
1131
01:18:24,282 --> 01:18:26,158
- Going back to LA?
- Yes.
1132
01:18:28,203 --> 01:18:31,706
Look, Miles, I think it's only fair to
warn you that after a decent interval,
1133
01:18:31,790 --> 01:18:34,375
I intend to have Freddy
seek an injunction
1134
01:18:34,459 --> 01:18:37,753
that would forbid you to approach
within 500 feet of my house.
1135
01:18:37,838 --> 01:18:39,171
You mean my house.
1136
01:18:39,256 --> 01:18:43,008
Oh, I believe the residence
will be part of the settlement.
1137
01:18:45,554 --> 01:18:50,349
Marylin, didn't last night
mean anything to you?
1138
01:18:50,434 --> 01:18:54,979
Oh, well, about as much as it'll
mean to you, half of your net worth.
1139
01:18:56,481 --> 01:19:02,403
Miles, you'll always be my favorite
husband. But no more sentiment, darling.
1140
01:19:03,447 --> 01:19:05,489
I really have to be going.
1141
01:19:06,825 --> 01:19:08,659
The dog's rented.
1142
01:19:17,753 --> 01:19:21,380
- You didn't win.
- Excuse me?
1143
01:19:21,465 --> 01:19:25,092
I can always tell, coming back
from Vegas, who didn't win.
1144
01:19:29,389 --> 01:19:30,848
(SIGHS)
You're right.
1145
01:19:34,936 --> 01:19:40,399
But you're going
through with it?
1146
01:19:40,484 --> 01:19:42,485
Yes.
1147
01:19:42,569 --> 01:19:46,280
I just felt so sorry for
him for a minute there.
1148
01:19:46,364 --> 01:19:49,617
At the preliminary hearing,
he just looked so beaten.
1149
01:19:49,701 --> 01:19:52,620
- Well, he was beaten fair and square.
- I know, but...
1150
01:19:52,704 --> 01:19:54,622
Oh, their pathetic look.
1151
01:19:54,706 --> 01:19:58,542
It's what they all fall back on
when they don't have a prenup.
1152
01:20:01,838 --> 01:20:05,007
Just stay strong until
the divorce is final.
1153
01:20:05,091 --> 01:20:08,385
Relax and enjoy your pool.
1154
01:20:13,517 --> 01:20:16,393
- Do you think he's eating enough?
- Marylin!
1155
01:20:18,647 --> 01:20:20,731
This woman has humbled,
1156
01:20:20,816 --> 01:20:21,982
(WHEEZES)
1157
01:20:22,442 --> 01:20:26,570
shamed, and disgraced
the entire firm.
1158
01:20:27,572 --> 01:20:32,493
- Yes, Herb.
- Counselor, this firm deals in power.
1159
01:20:34,538 --> 01:20:37,039
This firm deals in perception.
1160
01:20:38,917 --> 01:20:42,920
This firm cannot
prosper, nor long endure
1161
01:20:43,004 --> 01:20:49,593
if it is perceived to be dancing
to the music of a hurdy-gurdy!
1162
01:20:51,429 --> 01:20:52,847
It's just...
1163
01:20:54,266 --> 01:20:59,103
Herb, for the first time in my
career, I don't know what to do.
1164
01:21:00,772 --> 01:21:05,359
I'm a patsy. I'm a sitting duck.
I'm lost.
1165
01:21:05,443 --> 01:21:07,111
Lost?
1166
01:21:07,195 --> 01:21:11,824
I'll tell you what you can do.
You can act like a man.
1167
01:21:13,201 --> 01:21:14,802
And let me tell you
something, smart guy.
1168
01:21:14,828 --> 01:21:17,580
You thought you had
it all figured out.
1169
01:21:17,664 --> 01:21:24,211
(MOCKING) Trust. Marriage.
All your goddamn love, love, love!
1170
01:21:24,963 --> 01:21:29,884
Now, you listen to me. I'm gonna
talk to you about the goddamn law.
1171
01:21:29,968 --> 01:21:33,971
We serve the law!
We honor the law!
1172
01:21:34,973 --> 01:21:39,351
And sometimes, Counselor,
we obey the law.
1173
01:21:40,061 --> 01:21:46,150
But, Counselor, this is
not one of those times.
1174
01:21:48,403 --> 01:21:49,737
(WHEEZING)
1175
01:21:57,037 --> 01:22:00,456
Are you Wheezy Joe?
1176
01:22:01,041 --> 01:22:03,626
Which of you is Smith?
1177
01:22:03,710 --> 01:22:09,590
Well, we're here representing
Mr. Smith on a matter of some delicacy.
1178
01:22:09,674 --> 01:22:12,051
- Who's the pigeon?
- The what?
1179
01:22:12,135 --> 01:22:15,346
- Who you want me to kill?
- Yes. Well, we would like you...
1180
01:22:15,430 --> 01:22:19,934
Mr. Smith would like
you to neutralize,
1181
01:22:20,018 --> 01:22:25,814
terminate, render unto a state
of, so that she isn't so much...
1182
01:22:26,608 --> 01:22:29,902
- Breathing.
- Yes. A business associate
1183
01:22:29,986 --> 01:22:33,864
by the name of Marylin
Rexroth-Doyle-Massey... Smith-Massey.
1184
01:22:34,783 --> 01:22:37,701
Is that one person?
1185
01:22:37,786 --> 01:22:42,581
I have some photos
here of Miss Rexroth,
1186
01:22:42,666 --> 01:22:45,626
and that's the address
that she's staying at.
1187
01:22:45,710 --> 01:22:48,712
That is Mr. Smith's address.
Massey's, Smith...
1188
01:22:48,797 --> 01:22:52,174
It's Mr. Smith's address. Although
Mr. Smith is not directly involved.
1189
01:22:52,258 --> 01:22:53,884
WRIGLEY: Because of an
impending legal matter,
1190
01:22:53,969 --> 01:22:56,303
we need this to happen
within a certain time frame.
1191
01:22:56,388 --> 01:22:59,890
- On an expedited basis.
- You're in a rush.
1192
01:22:59,975 --> 01:23:02,309
- We're not in a rush.
- Mr. Smith is.
1193
01:23:12,445 --> 01:23:15,239
(STUTTERS) She won't...
She won't suffer, will she?
1194
01:23:16,449 --> 01:23:18,450
Not unless you pay extra.
1195
01:23:20,829 --> 01:23:23,205
I've been workin'
on the railroad.
1196
01:23:23,289 --> 01:23:25,833
WOMEN:
All the livelong day.
1197
01:23:25,917 --> 01:23:28,377
REX: I've been workin'
on the railroad.
1198
01:23:28,461 --> 01:23:31,672
WOMEN: Just to
pass the time away.
1199
01:23:31,756 --> 01:23:35,134
REX: Can't you hear
the whistle blowin'
1200
01:23:35,218 --> 01:23:37,469
Rise up early in the...
1201
01:23:37,554 --> 01:23:38,929
(GROANING)
1202
01:23:40,765 --> 01:23:43,308
WOMAN:
Whistles go "toot-toot."
1203
01:23:49,774 --> 01:23:51,942
What's the matter, Rexie?
1204
01:23:53,695 --> 01:23:55,070
(PHONE RINGING)
1205
01:23:59,159 --> 01:24:00,325
WRIGLEY:
Hello?
1206
01:24:02,954 --> 01:24:05,622
Yes, he's here.
One moment, please.
1207
01:24:18,970 --> 01:24:20,137
Miles.
1208
01:24:21,598 --> 01:24:23,182
It's for you.
1209
01:24:30,148 --> 01:24:33,567
Hello? Yes?
1210
01:24:43,286 --> 01:24:44,328
What?
1211
01:24:46,498 --> 01:24:48,123
I see.
1212
01:24:50,794 --> 01:24:53,128
- My God.
- What?
1213
01:24:53,963 --> 01:24:58,926
That was Marvin Untermeyer. He was
Rex Rexroth's personal attorney.
1214
01:24:59,010 --> 01:25:02,387
Yes? What do you mean he was?
1215
01:25:03,181 --> 01:25:07,101
Rex had a massive coronary in the
middle of a business meeting.
1216
01:25:08,144 --> 01:25:09,269
He's dead.
1217
01:25:10,313 --> 01:25:14,608
Well, I'm very sorry to hear that,
but you two weren't close, were you?
1218
01:25:14,692 --> 01:25:19,863
Marvin said that Rex's will was
four years old. Never redrafted it.
1219
01:25:20,448 --> 01:25:23,117
- He was stinking rich.
- Yes?
1220
01:25:26,121 --> 01:25:28,205
Everything goes to Marylin.
1221
01:25:31,543 --> 01:25:32,876
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1222
01:25:34,254 --> 01:25:36,588
She's not poor.
She's richer than you.
1223
01:25:36,673 --> 01:25:39,550
She is exposed. No prenup.
She's a sitting duck.
1224
01:25:39,634 --> 01:25:41,969
She's a sitting duck. Can't kill her.
No need.
1225
01:25:42,053 --> 01:25:44,304
- No. It would be pointless. She's exposed.
- It's pointless.
1226
01:25:44,389 --> 01:25:47,307
WRIGLEY: Why kill the only woman you've
ever loved when she's the richer party?
1227
01:25:47,392 --> 01:25:50,352
MILES: She's rich. And I love her.
Don't need to kill her.
1228
01:25:50,436 --> 01:25:51,979
- Ah!
- What, "Ah"?
1229
01:25:52,063 --> 01:25:53,647
- You've reached Wheezy Joe.
- Joe!
1230
01:25:53,731 --> 01:25:55,190
What do you want?
1231
01:25:55,275 --> 01:25:58,193
Hi, it's Miles Smith... Mr.
Smith calling to say,
1232
01:25:58,278 --> 01:26:00,487
- on behalf of myself, that it is...
- No-go.
1233
01:26:00,572 --> 01:26:02,865
No-go concerning Marylin.
1234
01:26:02,949 --> 01:26:06,410
I'm speaking with no knowledge.
This is what Mr. Smith wants.
1235
01:26:06,494 --> 01:26:08,162
This is what I want.
1236
01:26:08,246 --> 01:26:11,665
I am Mr. Smith. Thank you.
1237
01:26:14,752 --> 01:26:18,589
- That was good.
- You think I'm protected?
1238
01:26:18,673 --> 01:26:21,216
- Am I protected?
- I think it would hold up.
1239
01:26:21,301 --> 01:26:23,135
- Marylin.
- Yes, yes. Marylin.
1240
01:26:23,219 --> 01:26:25,095
What do we do? What if
he's on his way there?
1241
01:26:25,180 --> 01:26:26,346
Yes. Oh!
1242
01:26:26,431 --> 01:26:29,808
- If he's on his way there...
- Oh, no! Marylin!
1243
01:26:29,893 --> 01:26:33,729
Get her out and buy some time.
Buy some time!
1244
01:26:35,773 --> 01:26:37,107
(RINGING)
1245
01:26:40,111 --> 01:26:41,195
Hello?
1246
01:26:41,279 --> 01:26:43,697
Marylin, you must leave
the house immediately.
1247
01:26:43,781 --> 01:26:46,116
- It's imperative that you leave the house.
- Hello, Miles.
1248
01:26:46,201 --> 01:26:48,785
- Hello, dear.
- Now, Miles, pending final settlement,
1249
01:26:48,870 --> 01:26:52,206
- you know that I'm entitled to use the house.
- No, no, no! You don't understand, Marylin.
1250
01:26:52,290 --> 01:26:54,499
- It's an emergency! Yes.
- An emergency!
1251
01:26:54,584 --> 01:26:55,584
What is it?
1252
01:26:55,668 --> 01:26:59,046
I forgot that I left the
gas main on, which leaks!
1253
01:26:59,130 --> 01:27:02,841
- Good gosh. That sounds dangerous.
- It's a deadly, odorless, colorless,
1254
01:27:02,926 --> 01:27:06,220
liquidless gas that attacks
the central nervous system
1255
01:27:06,304 --> 01:27:09,264
and causes diarrhea
and facial tics!
1256
01:27:09,349 --> 01:27:11,183
Okay. All right.
1257
01:27:11,267 --> 01:27:13,393
- Well, thanks for calling, Miles.
- Okay. Bye-bye.
1258
01:27:16,481 --> 01:27:17,773
I think she bought it.
1259
01:27:22,320 --> 01:27:25,364
So, tell me,
1260
01:27:28,576 --> 01:27:30,035
who sent you?
1261
01:27:30,119 --> 01:27:31,119
(DOGS GROWLING)
1262
01:27:31,204 --> 01:27:32,663
Mr. Smith.
1263
01:27:33,915 --> 01:27:35,582
Is this Mr. Smith?
1264
01:27:36,542 --> 01:27:37,584
No.
1265
01:27:38,503 --> 01:27:39,753
That's his lawyer.
1266
01:27:42,674 --> 01:27:46,551
Whatever they're paying
you, I'll double.
1267
01:27:47,178 --> 01:27:48,512
(TIRES SCREECHING)
1268
01:27:49,180 --> 01:27:50,764
- WRIGLEY: What now?
- MILES: We wait for Wheezy Joe.
1269
01:27:50,848 --> 01:27:52,766
We tell him it's a no-go.
1270
01:27:52,850 --> 01:27:54,851
Careful. Rottweilers.
1271
01:28:01,943 --> 01:28:04,945
(WHISPERS) Looks like she's gone.
Looks like she bought it.
1272
01:28:05,029 --> 01:28:08,532
- WRIGLEY: Good stuff. There's no one here.
- MILES: Except for the Rottweilers.
1273
01:28:08,616 --> 01:28:11,368
WRIGLEY:
Sure. Rottweilers.
1274
01:28:12,912 --> 01:28:14,538
MILES:
You go that way.
1275
01:28:41,107 --> 01:28:42,274
(DOOR CREAKING)
1276
01:28:42,900 --> 01:28:44,276
Wheezy Joe?
1277
01:29:06,591 --> 01:29:07,758
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1278
01:29:17,935 --> 01:29:20,854
Wheezy Joe, thank
God you're in time.
1279
01:29:20,938 --> 01:29:24,649
You're not in time. We're in time.
Thank God we're in time.
1280
01:29:24,734 --> 01:29:27,402
Look, it's a no-go. You get it?
1281
01:29:27,487 --> 01:29:30,781
No one need be the wiser,
so you can just go on home.
1282
01:29:30,865 --> 01:29:33,533
Goodbye. You know,
thank you so much.
1283
01:29:33,618 --> 01:29:35,786
Hear that? Okay? No, no. No, no.
1284
01:29:35,870 --> 01:29:39,998
No, no. No-go. No contract.
It's off. It's...
1285
01:29:40,083 --> 01:29:42,876
- Will you explain to the lunkhead?
- No-go. It's a no-go.
1286
01:29:42,960 --> 01:29:46,963
We'll settle your contract later. Look,
you're fired, pal. Let it go. Walk away.
1287
01:29:47,048 --> 01:29:48,840
- Golden parachute.
- Don't let the screen door hit you.
1288
01:29:48,925 --> 01:29:51,218
- Does he speak any language?
- Here's what happened, Mr. Carnera.
1289
01:29:51,302 --> 01:29:53,095
We feel that...
1290
01:29:53,179 --> 01:29:54,554
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
1291
01:29:54,764 --> 01:29:55,764
(ALL SCREAMING)
1292
01:30:05,441 --> 01:30:06,691
(WHEEZING)
1293
01:30:09,987 --> 01:30:11,238
(INHALER HISSES)
1294
01:30:11,322 --> 01:30:12,447
(GUNSHOT)
1295
01:30:12,532 --> 01:30:13,740
Wheezy!
1296
01:30:28,214 --> 01:30:30,173
Told him it was a no-go.
1297
01:30:35,972 --> 01:30:37,055
(MACHINE BUZZING)
1298
01:30:44,856 --> 01:30:46,022
(DOOR OPENING)
1299
01:30:54,991 --> 01:30:56,992
- Gentlemen.
- WRIGLEY: Freddy.
1300
01:31:00,621 --> 01:31:03,290
- Hello, Marylin.
- Hello, Miles.
1301
01:31:05,209 --> 01:31:09,588
- This is where we first met, remember?
- Of course I remember.
1302
01:31:10,923 --> 01:31:13,467
It's hard to believe that when
you walk out that door today,
1303
01:31:13,551 --> 01:31:16,386
you'll be walking out
of my life forever.
1304
01:31:17,555 --> 01:31:19,473
It's not something
I wanted either.
1305
01:31:19,557 --> 01:31:21,391
But then, I guess
1306
01:31:22,977 --> 01:31:25,312
something inside of me died
1307
01:31:25,396 --> 01:31:29,065
when I realized that you'd
hired a goon to kill me.
1308
01:31:29,150 --> 01:31:32,444
- Wait a minute. You hired him to kill me.
- No. Both of you wait a minute.
1309
01:31:32,528 --> 01:31:35,280
- Nobody hired anyone to kill anyone.
- Hear, hear.
1310
01:31:35,364 --> 01:31:38,783
Apparently, from what I can gather,
a burglar broke into your house.
1311
01:31:38,868 --> 01:31:41,495
- WRIGLEY: Miles' house.
- Whatever! (CLEARS THROAT)
1312
01:31:41,579 --> 01:31:45,749
A burglar broke in intending
to loot the place, repented,
1313
01:31:45,833 --> 01:31:49,711
became despondent over his
lifestyle and shot himself.
1314
01:31:49,795 --> 01:31:55,008
- So where does that leave you and me?
- FREDDY: Well, we've outlined a settlement.
1315
01:31:55,092 --> 01:31:56,468
We think it's very generous.
1316
01:31:56,552 --> 01:32:00,805
My client is prepared to
consider a reconciliation.
1317
01:32:00,890 --> 01:32:03,058
But how could I trust you,
Miles, after all this?
1318
01:32:03,142 --> 01:32:04,726
FREDDY: See, that's exactly right.
The point is...
1319
01:32:04,810 --> 01:32:06,978
You wounded me first, Marylin.
1320
01:32:07,063 --> 01:32:11,066
I'm not proud of what I've done, but
God knows, I did trust you once.
1321
01:32:11,150 --> 01:32:16,112
If you could just give
us another chance.
1322
01:32:16,197 --> 01:32:18,073
(LAUGHS) Well, if
you'll pardon me here,
1323
01:32:18,157 --> 01:32:21,243
but I think my client is well
beyond the point of considering...
1324
01:32:21,327 --> 01:32:25,413
How could I ever trust you again?
I mean really trust you, Miles?
1325
01:32:40,137 --> 01:32:43,640
Marylin, there is nothing in
the Massey prenup that says
1326
01:32:43,724 --> 01:32:47,018
it can't be executed
after the parties wed.
1327
01:32:48,771 --> 01:32:52,148
Well, if this indeed
is a Massey prenup,
1328
01:32:53,818 --> 01:32:57,779
and a cursory examination tends to
support that it is, then... (SCREAMS)
1329
01:32:58,281 --> 01:32:59,406
(CRYING)
1330
01:33:00,366 --> 01:33:03,034
Oh, my God, Marylin.
You're exposed.
1331
01:33:07,164 --> 01:33:08,290
Marylin.
1332
01:33:17,091 --> 01:33:21,136
Counselor! Freddy!
1333
01:33:21,220 --> 01:33:23,888
Freddy! Come on, Freddy!
No fair!
1334
01:33:24,682 --> 01:33:25,890
Freddy!
1335
01:33:30,730 --> 01:33:34,858
- Did you hear something?
- Only the patter of little lawyers' feet.
1336
01:33:41,032 --> 01:33:43,742
Where did you find Howard?
1337
01:33:43,826 --> 01:33:48,663
The actor? From a TV producer.
I think you know him.
1338
01:33:48,748 --> 01:33:52,542
I gave him an idea for a new
show, so he made me a partner.
1339
01:33:58,299 --> 01:34:01,760
- I guess that means I'm a partner.
- I guess it does.
1340
01:34:04,472 --> 01:34:07,265
And what exactly is
it we're partners in?
1341
01:34:15,358 --> 01:34:17,942
ANNOUNCER: (ON TV)
Who gets what, and who gets who?
1342
01:34:18,027 --> 01:34:21,988
You'll find out on America's
Funniest Divorce Videos.
1343
01:34:22,073 --> 01:34:25,575
Here's the star of
our show, Gus Petch!
1344
01:34:25,660 --> 01:34:26,910
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1345
01:34:28,913 --> 01:34:33,833
You goddamn right, folks. I'm Gus Petch.
And we got a great show for you.
1346
01:34:33,918 --> 01:34:36,503
We gonna make you laugh.
We gonna make you cry.
1347
01:34:36,587 --> 01:34:41,800
- But most of all, we gonna nail your ass!
- AUDIENCE: Ass!
1348
01:34:41,884 --> 01:34:44,010
(CHANTING)
Nail your ass!
1349
01:34:44,095 --> 01:34:48,515
Nail your ass! Nail your ass!
1350
01:34:48,599 --> 01:34:50,308
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1351
01:34:57,942 --> 01:35:01,986
AUDIENCE: (CHANTING) Gus! Gus! Gus!
Gus! Gus! Gus! Gus! Gus!