0 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000 1 00:00:05,799 --> 00:00:10,799 Subtitles by explosiveskull 2 00:00:10,801 --> 00:00:12,901 ♪ Tonight let's hang The colors ♪ 3 00:00:12,903 --> 00:00:15,537 ♪ String some white lights All around me ♪ 4 00:00:15,539 --> 00:00:18,442 ♪ Merry fill the season With cheer ♪ 5 00:00:20,410 --> 00:00:22,643 ♪ Do some Secret Santa shopping ♪ 6 00:00:22,645 --> 00:00:24,846 ♪ Then we'll run out Party hopping ♪ 7 00:00:24,848 --> 00:00:28,252 ♪ See friends That we missed all year ♪ 8 00:00:29,653 --> 00:00:31,854 ♪ I can't recall a Christmas ♪ 9 00:00:31,856 --> 00:00:33,856 ♪ That was anything but magic ♪ 10 00:00:33,858 --> 00:00:37,091 ♪ But I just have a feeling ♪ 11 00:00:37,093 --> 00:00:41,396 ♪ It's gonna be The best Christmas ♪ 12 00:00:41,398 --> 00:00:45,502 ♪ The best Christmas, yeah ♪ 13 00:00:47,438 --> 00:00:50,939 ♪ It's gonna be The best Christmas ♪ 14 00:00:50,941 --> 00:00:54,410 ♪ The best Christmas, yeah ♪ 15 00:00:58,749 --> 00:01:00,348 ♪ Let's watch them Light the trees ♪ 16 00:01:00,350 --> 00:01:03,118 ♪ Sing carols Move in next to me ♪ 17 00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:06,491 ♪ While our candles glow Like the stars ♪ 18 00:01:07,824 --> 00:01:10,426 ♪ Snow still falling All around ♪ 19 00:01:10,428 --> 00:01:12,593 ♪ Let's make angels On the ground ♪ 20 00:01:12,595 --> 00:01:15,699 ♪ Go sledding In our neighbors backyard ♪ 21 00:01:17,500 --> 00:01:19,635 ♪ It's gonna fly by quickly ♪ 22 00:01:19,637 --> 00:01:21,736 ♪ So let's enjoy each moment ♪ 23 00:01:21,738 --> 00:01:24,739 ♪ 'Cause I just have a feeling ♪ 24 00:01:24,741 --> 00:01:28,876 ♪ It's gonna be The best Christmas ♪ 25 00:01:28,878 --> 00:01:32,883 ♪ The best Christmas, yeah ♪ 26 00:01:34,919 --> 00:01:38,620 ♪ It's gonna be The best Christmas ♪ 27 00:01:38,622 --> 00:01:42,694 ♪ The best Christmas, yeah ♪ 28 00:01:46,229 --> 00:01:49,333 ♪ Having you here with me ♪ 29 00:01:50,734 --> 00:01:53,871 ♪ There's no way That it won't be ♪ 30 00:01:55,538 --> 00:01:57,805 ♪ The best Christmas ♪ 31 00:01:57,807 --> 00:02:01,746 ♪ The best Christmas, yeah ♪ 32 00:02:03,646 --> 00:02:07,182 ♪ It's gonna be The best Christmas ♪ 33 00:02:07,184 --> 00:02:11,556 ♪ The best Christmas, yeah ♪ 34 00:02:32,243 --> 00:02:35,844 ♪ It's gonna be The best Christmas ♪ 35 00:02:35,846 --> 00:02:40,715 ♪ The best Christmas, yeah ♪ 36 00:03:01,771 --> 00:03:03,638 Nicky's gone crazy! 37 00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:05,541 Oh. 38 00:03:05,543 --> 00:03:06,843 This is the best Christmas ever. 39 00:03:09,712 --> 00:03:12,280 Mommy, why is Nicky killing Christmas? 40 00:03:12,282 --> 00:03:14,815 It's just something teenage girls do. 41 00:03:14,817 --> 00:03:17,587 Nicky, you stop this behavior, right now! 42 00:03:19,089 --> 00:03:20,956 Before you decide 43 00:03:20,958 --> 00:03:22,590 that I'm the bad guy here. 44 00:03:22,592 --> 00:03:26,695 Let me explain to you about my childhood. 45 00:03:26,697 --> 00:03:29,030 Be a little elf for us, honey. Be a baby elf. 46 00:03:29,032 --> 00:03:31,099 Please, princess, just be an elf. 47 00:03:31,101 --> 00:03:32,567 - Nicky. - Oh! 48 00:03:32,569 --> 00:03:33,702 - Yeah... Oh! Get... - Nicky... 49 00:03:33,704 --> 00:03:35,337 Get on with it. 50 00:03:35,339 --> 00:03:36,838 It'll be just one moment. 51 00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:38,839 Even then, my tiny baby brain knew 52 00:03:38,841 --> 00:03:39,975 I had to do something. 53 00:03:39,977 --> 00:03:41,142 No elf. 54 00:03:41,144 --> 00:03:43,744 Her first words. She said her first words! 55 00:03:43,746 --> 00:03:44,980 Christmas words. 56 00:03:44,982 --> 00:03:46,280 No elf. 57 00:03:47,717 --> 00:03:49,519 Sorry, kid, I can't help you. 58 00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:53,056 You're stuck with the family you're born into. 59 00:03:55,893 --> 00:03:58,025 Your daddy has a very special 60 00:03:58,027 --> 00:03:59,994 Christmas surprise for you, Nicky. 61 00:03:59,996 --> 00:04:01,329 A penguin? 62 00:04:01,331 --> 00:04:02,930 No, Nicky. 63 00:04:02,932 --> 00:04:06,767 It is a real live reindeer! 64 00:04:06,769 --> 00:04:08,337 Ah! 65 00:04:08,339 --> 00:04:10,005 Oh, no. 66 00:04:10,007 --> 00:04:12,874 Why is she wearing her polar bear costume? 67 00:04:12,876 --> 00:04:15,743 Polar bears are the natural enemies of reindeer. 68 00:04:15,745 --> 00:04:17,078 Everyone knows that. 69 00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:19,681 - No one knows that. - It's common knowledge for him. 70 00:04:19,683 --> 00:04:20,816 Ah! 71 00:04:24,989 --> 00:04:27,723 - Bad, Blitzen! - Stop that reindeer! 72 00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:31,693 Even my first romance was ruined by my dad's OCD. 73 00:04:31,695 --> 00:04:32,927 Obsessive Christmas disorder. 74 00:04:32,929 --> 00:04:34,799 Thanks for taking me to the movie. 75 00:04:38,936 --> 00:04:40,638 What's with all this Christmas stuff? 76 00:04:41,337 --> 00:04:42,771 It's only September. 77 00:04:42,773 --> 00:04:44,508 Oh, this stuff? 78 00:04:47,044 --> 00:04:49,377 I didn't really notice. 79 00:04:49,379 --> 00:04:50,680 You just ignore it. 80 00:04:51,948 --> 00:04:53,648 You're so pretty. 81 00:04:55,051 --> 00:04:56,785 Wanna kiss? 82 00:04:56,787 --> 00:04:58,153 Okay. 83 00:04:58,155 --> 00:04:59,890 Never kissed a boy before. 84 00:05:05,028 --> 00:05:06,061 Ho, ho, ho! 85 00:05:06,063 --> 00:05:07,496 Whoa! 86 00:05:07,498 --> 00:05:08,663 - Ho, ho, ho! - Oh, watch out, his hands, uh... 87 00:05:08,665 --> 00:05:10,665 - Ho, ho, ho! - Um, I mean, 88 00:05:10,667 --> 00:05:11,833 you can still kiss me. 89 00:05:11,835 --> 00:05:13,268 Not in front of Santa. 90 00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:15,871 - Ho, ho, ho! - How do you turn this thing off? 91 00:05:15,873 --> 00:05:17,672 Ho, ho, ho! 92 00:05:17,674 --> 00:05:19,441 Ho, ho, ho! 93 00:05:22,378 --> 00:05:24,812 ♪ Christmas things Christmas things ♪ 94 00:05:24,814 --> 00:05:25,946 ♪ Christmas ring, ding, dong ♪ 95 00:05:25,948 --> 00:05:27,951 Ho, ho, ho! 96 00:05:28,986 --> 00:05:30,184 I gotta go. 97 00:05:30,186 --> 00:05:31,787 Oh, curfew? 98 00:05:31,789 --> 00:05:33,958 - No. - Oh, well, uh, text me! 99 00:05:34,691 --> 00:05:35,926 This was fun! 100 00:05:37,227 --> 00:05:39,427 Ho, ho, ho! 101 00:05:39,429 --> 00:05:41,095 Ho, ho, ho! 102 00:05:41,097 --> 00:05:43,398 Merry Christmas, everybody. 103 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:46,100 Ho, ho, ho! 104 00:05:46,102 --> 00:05:48,436 Yes, some kids with difficult childhoods 105 00:05:48,438 --> 00:05:50,872 turn to drugs and crime. 106 00:05:50,874 --> 00:05:53,040 Instead, I found my refuge 107 00:05:53,042 --> 00:05:55,177 in the traditional instrument of rebellion. 108 00:05:55,179 --> 00:05:56,711 The tuba. 109 00:06:11,761 --> 00:06:13,227 You know you're playing the trumpet part, 110 00:06:13,229 --> 00:06:15,129 not the tenor tuba part, right? 111 00:06:15,131 --> 00:06:18,766 Hm. I'm a musical maverick. 112 00:06:18,768 --> 00:06:19,900 Playing the tuba gives you those 113 00:06:19,902 --> 00:06:21,936 great looking upper arms, Nicky. 114 00:06:21,938 --> 00:06:23,405 And well-defined cheeks, 115 00:06:23,407 --> 00:06:26,475 but, uh, playing flute means I get to tilt my head like this, 116 00:06:26,477 --> 00:06:29,076 which, uh, Josh, that hot keyboard player, 117 00:06:29,078 --> 00:06:31,045 finds very attractive. 118 00:06:31,047 --> 00:06:33,114 Especially, when I go like this. 119 00:06:36,220 --> 00:06:38,754 Or he thinks you're having a seizure. 120 00:06:38,756 --> 00:06:40,287 Performing arts camp is the best, right? 121 00:06:40,289 --> 00:06:41,622 - Hmm. - All right, 122 00:06:41,624 --> 00:06:42,723 I've put in my five minutes of practice for the day, 123 00:06:42,725 --> 00:06:43,790 so let's go before the cello girls 124 00:06:43,792 --> 00:06:46,127 - get all the guys. - Ugh! 125 00:06:46,129 --> 00:06:47,362 God, those cello girls are the worst. 126 00:06:47,364 --> 00:06:48,929 Look, I'm gonna have to catch up with you. 127 00:06:48,931 --> 00:06:49,997 I gotta get this passage down. 128 00:06:49,999 --> 00:06:51,900 The double tonguing is super tricky. 129 00:06:51,902 --> 00:06:53,104 Mm. You know what? 130 00:06:54,203 --> 00:06:55,903 I'd like to double tongue Josh. 131 00:06:55,905 --> 00:06:56,937 Oh... 132 00:06:56,939 --> 00:06:58,105 God. 133 00:06:58,107 --> 00:07:00,040 That was a good one, right? 134 00:07:00,042 --> 00:07:02,544 You should give me more setups like that. 135 00:07:02,546 --> 00:07:04,780 Look, you can do this whole focused-on-your-work thing 136 00:07:04,782 --> 00:07:08,917 all you want, but, uh, we are sharing a closet here, 137 00:07:08,919 --> 00:07:10,985 and I've seen some of the bras you brought. 138 00:07:10,987 --> 00:07:13,657 And some of them are super lacy. 139 00:07:14,323 --> 00:07:15,657 What's up with that? 140 00:07:15,659 --> 00:07:20,063 Well, surely you're not suggesting something scandalous? 141 00:07:21,030 --> 00:07:22,032 Silly. 142 00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:26,936 Staying inside on a summer day is so sad. 143 00:07:30,140 --> 00:07:31,807 Oi! 144 00:07:31,809 --> 00:07:32,943 Suit yourself. 145 00:07:35,345 --> 00:07:36,410 Okay. 146 00:08:00,369 --> 00:08:02,937 Who was playing the trumpet song? 147 00:08:39,575 --> 00:08:41,075 Oh! 148 00:08:53,023 --> 00:08:54,923 Thank for walking me to class again. 149 00:08:54,925 --> 00:08:57,291 Walking you? I thought you were walking me. 150 00:08:57,293 --> 00:09:00,027 This is a pretty tough neighborhood. 151 00:09:00,029 --> 00:09:01,898 I'll do my best to protect you. 152 00:09:03,332 --> 00:09:05,032 I need a tough 153 00:09:05,034 --> 00:09:06,601 Santa Clarita girl who would keep me safe. 154 00:09:06,603 --> 00:09:08,806 Santa Clarita? How'd you know that? 155 00:09:09,639 --> 00:09:11,372 Someone's a clever boy. 156 00:09:11,374 --> 00:09:13,109 Actually, it was written on your tuba case. 157 00:09:14,143 --> 00:09:15,910 Oh! 158 00:09:15,912 --> 00:09:18,045 But I was clever enough to learn to read when I was six, 159 00:09:18,047 --> 00:09:19,249 'cause I knew this day would come. 160 00:09:20,683 --> 00:09:22,385 You wanna go on a date some time, Nicky? 161 00:09:23,686 --> 00:09:26,221 Well, where would you take me? 162 00:09:26,223 --> 00:09:28,323 You know, I'm, uh, kind of a fancy girl. 163 00:09:28,325 --> 00:09:29,723 Well, since there's only a mess hall, 164 00:09:29,725 --> 00:09:32,327 I was thinking we could go down there for a PowerBar? 165 00:09:32,329 --> 00:09:33,364 OG juice? 166 00:09:34,130 --> 00:09:35,131 Fancy enough. 167 00:09:42,104 --> 00:09:44,171 Okay, class, for this next improv 168 00:09:44,173 --> 00:09:46,073 let me have two volunteers. 169 00:09:46,075 --> 00:09:48,075 - Oh, oh. - Okay, Stephanie and... 170 00:09:48,077 --> 00:09:49,144 Josh. 171 00:09:49,146 --> 00:09:51,378 - Oh, Josh. - Me. Pick me. 172 00:09:51,380 --> 00:09:52,948 And Josh. 173 00:09:52,950 --> 00:09:54,716 Oh! 174 00:09:58,154 --> 00:09:59,221 Slick move. 175 00:09:59,223 --> 00:10:00,389 - I respect a good wingwoman. - Hi. 176 00:10:00,391 --> 00:10:02,958 That goes for both friends and superheroes. 177 00:10:04,027 --> 00:10:05,392 Now we need a relationship 178 00:10:05,394 --> 00:10:06,962 - for these two. - Married. 179 00:10:06,964 --> 00:10:08,496 - And a location. - Desert island. 180 00:10:08,498 --> 00:10:09,963 And begin. 181 00:10:09,965 --> 00:10:12,700 Oh, honey, I can't believe were stuck on a desert island 182 00:10:12,702 --> 00:10:15,002 for our tenth wedding anniversary. 183 00:10:15,004 --> 00:10:16,737 It's not our anniversary. 184 00:10:16,739 --> 00:10:18,473 Oh. Stop, stop, stop. 185 00:10:18,475 --> 00:10:22,376 People, the first rule of improv is, yes, and. 186 00:10:22,378 --> 00:10:24,445 Any time a scene partner says something 187 00:10:24,447 --> 00:10:26,982 you must agree and add on to it. 188 00:10:26,984 --> 00:10:30,150 Yes, and, is the most important rule in the theater. 189 00:10:30,152 --> 00:10:31,453 And in life. 190 00:10:31,455 --> 00:10:33,190 - Try it again. - Okay. 191 00:10:34,124 --> 00:10:35,022 All right. 192 00:10:35,024 --> 00:10:37,992 Honey, help me! 193 00:10:37,994 --> 00:10:39,361 I'm... I'm downing, I can't breathe. 194 00:10:39,363 --> 00:10:42,329 I need mouth to mouth resuscitation. Save me, please. 195 00:10:42,331 --> 00:10:44,232 - She's drowning. - No, I'm gonna die. 196 00:10:44,234 --> 00:10:45,400 You gotta kiss me and give me mouth to mouth. 197 00:10:45,402 --> 00:10:46,501 Yeah, you just need to... 198 00:10:46,503 --> 00:10:47,972 Let's start our own improv. 199 00:10:51,508 --> 00:10:53,274 Yes, and. 200 00:11:01,151 --> 00:11:02,516 Can't believe we gotta go home. 201 00:11:02,518 --> 00:11:03,984 Summer really flies by, 202 00:11:03,986 --> 00:11:05,786 especially when you're hanging with girl who's beautiful, 203 00:11:05,788 --> 00:11:07,421 and plays the tuba. 204 00:11:07,423 --> 00:11:09,524 I am a rare combination. 205 00:11:12,061 --> 00:11:13,495 Yes, you are. 206 00:11:13,497 --> 00:11:15,429 I hate that you live in California. 207 00:11:15,431 --> 00:11:18,065 I hate that you live in Connecticut. 208 00:11:18,067 --> 00:11:20,334 Maybe I can convince my dad we should move to Cali. 209 00:11:20,336 --> 00:11:22,170 Okay. 210 00:11:22,172 --> 00:11:25,740 No one calls it Cali, but it's cute when you do it. 211 00:11:25,742 --> 00:11:28,142 You know, I like this plan. 212 00:11:28,144 --> 00:11:30,045 I'll start making brownies for your mom and dad 213 00:11:30,047 --> 00:11:31,415 as soon as I land. 214 00:11:32,315 --> 00:11:34,516 Well, my mom's actually... 215 00:11:34,518 --> 00:11:36,818 She's not around, you know. 216 00:11:36,820 --> 00:11:39,286 - Oh, I... - Oh, no. It's totally fine. 217 00:11:39,288 --> 00:11:41,256 Not like she died or anything. 218 00:11:41,258 --> 00:11:42,526 Really, it's no big deal. 219 00:11:46,763 --> 00:11:49,133 Are your parents divorced? 220 00:11:51,067 --> 00:11:52,367 Yeah. 221 00:11:52,369 --> 00:11:55,038 My mom sorta left one day. 222 00:11:56,072 --> 00:11:58,238 - Wow. - Yeah. 223 00:11:58,240 --> 00:11:59,475 It really hit my dad hard. 224 00:12:00,409 --> 00:12:01,444 I'm sorry. 225 00:12:02,611 --> 00:12:04,813 It's okay. 226 00:12:04,815 --> 00:12:06,450 Things don't seem so bad when you're around. 227 00:12:12,288 --> 00:12:13,755 Aww. 228 00:12:13,757 --> 00:12:16,790 You guys are criminally adorable but we're gonna miss our flight. 229 00:12:16,792 --> 00:12:19,126 Stephanie, how long have you been standing there? 230 00:12:19,128 --> 00:12:21,398 No need to feel embarrassed, your love gives me life. 231 00:12:23,233 --> 00:12:26,101 I don't get it. 232 00:12:26,103 --> 00:12:27,468 I hope this isn't just a summer fling, 233 00:12:27,470 --> 00:12:30,838 because I really wanna come visit you. 234 00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:33,376 It isn't. And you better. 235 00:12:42,619 --> 00:12:45,285 Jesus. Mom? 236 00:12:45,287 --> 00:12:48,122 - Dad, I'm home. - My baby! 237 00:12:48,124 --> 00:12:49,424 Oh! 238 00:12:49,426 --> 00:12:51,291 Mm. Missed you too, Dad. 239 00:12:51,293 --> 00:12:54,828 Oh, it is so difficult being away from my daughter 240 00:12:54,830 --> 00:12:56,598 during the pre-Christmas season. 241 00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,599 - It's August. - That's pre. 242 00:12:58,601 --> 00:13:01,269 Come on. Everybody, Nicky's home! 243 00:13:01,271 --> 00:13:02,636 You must be so excited. 244 00:13:02,638 --> 00:13:04,405 Don't hit the displays, I worked really hard on those. 245 00:13:04,407 --> 00:13:06,274 Fam, fam, family. 246 00:13:06,276 --> 00:13:08,675 Time for our pre-Christmas meeting. 247 00:13:08,677 --> 00:13:11,246 - Noelle? - Daddy, I'm here. 248 00:13:11,248 --> 00:13:14,248 Of course you are, sugar plum. Good job. 249 00:13:14,250 --> 00:13:17,385 Ho, ho, hold a minute there, Nicky. 250 00:13:17,387 --> 00:13:19,489 It's meeting time, you're not going anywhere. 251 00:13:21,423 --> 00:13:23,158 Hey, Dad. I am present, 252 00:13:24,224 --> 00:13:25,193 and ready to do whatever is necessary 253 00:13:25,195 --> 00:13:26,627 to ensure the best Christmas ever. 254 00:13:26,629 --> 00:13:28,295 Well, that's my boy. 255 00:13:28,297 --> 00:13:30,430 Are you sure it's your boy? 256 00:13:30,432 --> 00:13:31,534 Mom! 257 00:13:33,570 --> 00:13:35,636 Really, we're going to... We're gonna do this? 258 00:13:35,638 --> 00:13:38,305 And cut your hair, you damn hippie. 259 00:13:38,307 --> 00:13:39,540 Okay. Really? 260 00:13:39,542 --> 00:13:41,244 She's not in her right mind. 261 00:13:45,916 --> 00:13:47,948 Anyways, 262 00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:51,352 as you all know, our family is known in this neighborhood 263 00:13:51,354 --> 00:13:54,722 for its Christmas spirit, Christmas cheer, 264 00:13:54,724 --> 00:13:56,524 and having more boughs of holly 265 00:13:56,526 --> 00:13:59,327 than any other house in the state. 266 00:13:59,329 --> 00:14:00,527 And we are also known 267 00:14:00,529 --> 00:14:05,466 for having the most valuable collectible item 268 00:14:05,468 --> 00:14:07,202 in all of Christmas land. 269 00:14:07,204 --> 00:14:08,670 I speak of course, 270 00:14:08,672 --> 00:14:11,506 of the very same hat worn by Santa 271 00:14:11,508 --> 00:14:14,409 in the greatest film of all time, 272 00:14:14,411 --> 00:14:17,212 Miracle on 34th Street. 273 00:14:17,214 --> 00:14:18,713 Not the remake, but the original, 274 00:14:18,715 --> 00:14:20,615 way back in 1947. 275 00:14:20,617 --> 00:14:22,650 - Chills. - Mm-hmm. Yeah. 276 00:14:22,652 --> 00:14:25,319 I actually wore that hat 277 00:14:25,321 --> 00:14:26,987 the day I proposed to your mother. 278 00:14:26,989 --> 00:14:28,455 What girl could say no to that? 279 00:14:28,457 --> 00:14:32,694 I was also wearing it on the day when each of you kids were born. 280 00:14:32,696 --> 00:14:34,228 And conceived. 281 00:14:37,300 --> 00:14:40,671 And I think you kids turned out pretty darn good. 282 00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:47,677 Which makes that one lucky hat. Hmm. 283 00:14:49,479 --> 00:14:51,545 And every year, 284 00:14:51,547 --> 00:14:55,384 I feel like we have to earn the right to own this hat. 285 00:15:03,627 --> 00:15:05,593 Oh, honey. 286 00:15:05,595 --> 00:15:07,163 Stay inside, tears. 287 00:15:07,663 --> 00:15:09,198 Stay inside. 288 00:15:12,335 --> 00:15:13,670 Okay, who wants muffins? 289 00:15:44,468 --> 00:15:46,000 Hello. 290 00:15:47,336 --> 00:15:48,969 Hey! 291 00:15:48,971 --> 00:15:50,737 I have a super important question for you. 292 00:15:50,739 --> 00:15:54,344 Do you guys do like, uh, you know, a big Christmas? 293 00:15:55,512 --> 00:15:57,745 What? No. 294 00:15:57,747 --> 00:15:59,847 It's totally low-key. Very chill. 295 00:15:59,849 --> 00:16:01,848 In fact, it's a low-key version of chill. 296 00:16:01,850 --> 00:16:03,684 Why, what have you heard? 297 00:16:03,686 --> 00:16:05,520 I was thinking, 298 00:16:05,522 --> 00:16:07,391 maybe me and my dad could come out to Cali to see you. 299 00:16:09,058 --> 00:16:11,391 Really? 300 00:16:11,393 --> 00:16:12,395 That's... 301 00:16:13,095 --> 00:16:14,862 That's amazing. 302 00:16:14,864 --> 00:16:16,229 I'm so excited, 303 00:16:16,231 --> 00:16:18,598 I'm gonna let the fact that you called it "Cali" slide. 304 00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:20,333 I didn't really get into it, 305 00:16:20,335 --> 00:16:23,804 but, um, when my mom left us, she actually left 306 00:16:23,806 --> 00:16:26,473 on Christmas day. 307 00:16:26,475 --> 00:16:28,477 It'd be good for my dad to get outta here. 308 00:16:29,611 --> 00:16:31,245 Being around the snow, 309 00:16:31,247 --> 00:16:33,580 the decorations, the trees in this town... 310 00:16:33,582 --> 00:16:35,348 it's not good for him. 311 00:16:35,350 --> 00:16:37,617 I mean, that Christmas morning she left all those stockings 312 00:16:37,619 --> 00:16:39,319 just empty. 313 00:16:39,321 --> 00:16:43,357 You know, big Christmas tree, no presents underneath. 314 00:16:43,359 --> 00:16:46,727 I think every ornament he sees is like a stab to the heart. 315 00:16:46,729 --> 00:16:48,262 Stab. 316 00:16:48,264 --> 00:16:50,433 The main thing is, I get to see you. 317 00:16:54,370 --> 00:16:55,536 Did you miss me? 318 00:16:55,538 --> 00:16:57,872 - Uh, mostly the tuba. - Mm. 319 00:16:57,874 --> 00:17:00,375 But I guess I missed you too. 320 00:17:00,377 --> 00:17:02,010 This is gonna be great. 321 00:17:02,012 --> 00:17:04,447 I'm really looking forward to a low-key Christmas. 322 00:17:05,782 --> 00:17:07,514 Okay, okay. Everyone set? 323 00:17:07,516 --> 00:17:11,519 Christmas family photo, in three, two, one. 324 00:17:17,827 --> 00:17:19,263 - Thanks. - Thanks. 325 00:17:24,801 --> 00:17:26,867 This is a disaster. 326 00:17:26,869 --> 00:17:29,305 Well, matzoh ball soup fixes everything. 327 00:17:29,839 --> 00:17:31,905 See? Isn't that better? 328 00:17:31,907 --> 00:17:33,508 Nope. 329 00:17:33,510 --> 00:17:34,841 Tanner's still flying 2,000 miles 330 00:17:34,843 --> 00:17:36,143 to get away from Christmas. 331 00:17:36,145 --> 00:17:38,445 And instead, he and his dad are gonna wind up 332 00:17:38,447 --> 00:17:40,714 in the eye of the Christmas tornado. 333 00:17:40,716 --> 00:17:43,784 My house is ground zero for holiday horrors. 334 00:17:43,786 --> 00:17:45,619 It's a Christmas crap storm. 335 00:17:45,621 --> 00:17:47,821 I can't put the poor guy through a Christmas version 336 00:17:47,823 --> 00:17:49,690 of A Clockwork Orange 337 00:17:49,692 --> 00:17:51,024 Don't... 338 00:17:51,026 --> 00:17:53,194 Maybe I can ask my dad to tone it down this year, 339 00:17:53,196 --> 00:17:54,694 just this one time. 340 00:17:54,696 --> 00:17:56,196 Maybe, I dunno. 341 00:17:56,198 --> 00:17:57,531 Hey, Nicky. 342 00:17:57,533 --> 00:17:59,700 I thought I saw your dad on the line at the mall 343 00:17:59,702 --> 00:18:00,934 to sit in Santa's lap. 344 00:18:00,936 --> 00:18:04,438 Is that a holiday thing or a lifestyle change? 345 00:18:05,509 --> 00:18:08,412 At least I know who my father is, Danny. 346 00:18:08,911 --> 00:18:10,511 Ooh. 347 00:18:12,615 --> 00:18:15,482 I'm sorry. 348 00:18:15,484 --> 00:18:19,186 Oh, look at me, the stress of this is turning me evil. 349 00:18:19,188 --> 00:18:20,722 I wish I could just be Jewish 350 00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:23,158 like you, and then I wouldn't have to deal with any of this. 351 00:18:24,224 --> 00:18:25,760 Yes, because to be Jewish is to live a problem-free life. 352 00:18:25,762 --> 00:18:26,961 I mean, historically, 353 00:18:26,963 --> 00:18:28,898 when have the Jews ever had any troubles? 354 00:18:30,867 --> 00:18:32,599 Maybe I could ask Tanner to come over 355 00:18:32,601 --> 00:18:33,835 spring break instead. 356 00:18:33,837 --> 00:18:35,802 I think that's much safer. 357 00:18:35,804 --> 00:18:38,239 But his love might die by then. 358 00:18:38,241 --> 00:18:39,674 Better to chance the slow death of his love, 359 00:18:39,676 --> 00:18:43,176 than he meets your family and it just dies instantly. 360 00:18:43,178 --> 00:18:44,511 You're right. 361 00:18:44,513 --> 00:18:46,713 - I have to tell him now to come. - Mm-hmm. 362 00:18:49,953 --> 00:18:51,388 Ow! 363 00:18:52,754 --> 00:18:54,957 No father, now this. 364 00:18:58,761 --> 00:18:59,926 I can do it. 365 00:18:59,928 --> 00:19:00,793 Let me hear you say it 366 00:19:00,795 --> 00:19:01,895 - I can do it. - Okay. 367 00:19:01,897 --> 00:19:03,931 Then let me hear you say it. 368 00:19:03,933 --> 00:19:05,566 Tanner, I'm sorry. 369 00:19:05,568 --> 00:19:07,033 But I can't see you at Christmas. 370 00:19:07,035 --> 00:19:09,703 Good. Now just stay strong. 371 00:19:09,705 --> 00:19:11,806 Let him know spring break will be here before he knows it, 372 00:19:11,808 --> 00:19:15,512 and then, bam! Lovers reunite, music swells, fade to black. Ha! 373 00:19:16,646 --> 00:19:17,748 Okay. 374 00:19:24,286 --> 00:19:26,220 Hey! 375 00:19:26,222 --> 00:19:28,055 Hey! Uh, so... 376 00:19:28,057 --> 00:19:31,826 Uh, I was thinking about what you said about coming, 377 00:19:31,828 --> 00:19:33,394 - And... - I know, 378 00:19:33,396 --> 00:19:35,096 I can't stop thinking about it either, I'm so excited. 379 00:19:35,098 --> 00:19:37,865 You know, my dad is looking forward to it too. 380 00:19:40,536 --> 00:19:42,235 - Well... - Hold on. 381 00:19:42,237 --> 00:19:44,004 Something's wrong. 382 00:19:44,006 --> 00:19:45,542 You don't want me to come? 383 00:19:46,309 --> 00:19:48,041 Um... 384 00:19:48,043 --> 00:19:49,109 No, if you don't feel the same way I do, 385 00:19:49,111 --> 00:19:49,976 I don't wanna pressure you. 386 00:19:49,978 --> 00:19:52,213 No, no. No, it's not about that. 387 00:19:52,215 --> 00:19:53,817 I... I don't feel pressure at all. 388 00:19:54,817 --> 00:19:56,651 So... 389 00:19:56,653 --> 00:19:57,952 We both still really like each other 390 00:19:57,954 --> 00:19:59,686 after all these months, huh? 391 00:19:59,688 --> 00:20:02,022 I guess this is pretty serious. 392 00:20:02,024 --> 00:20:03,724 To be honest, 393 00:20:03,726 --> 00:20:04,725 I'm just using you because I need a tuba player 394 00:20:04,727 --> 00:20:05,427 for my death metal band. 395 00:20:07,062 --> 00:20:08,596 You shred a mean tuba. 396 00:20:10,699 --> 00:20:13,267 You probably say that tuba stuff to all the girls. 397 00:20:13,269 --> 00:20:14,769 I got you something. 398 00:20:14,771 --> 00:20:15,802 It's a surprise. 399 00:20:15,804 --> 00:20:16,971 You wanna know what it is? 400 00:20:16,973 --> 00:20:18,239 - I... - It's a present 401 00:20:18,241 --> 00:20:20,308 I had made for you. 402 00:20:20,310 --> 00:20:21,876 Gold bass clef symbol. 403 00:20:21,878 --> 00:20:24,779 Because you know, you rock the bottom. 404 00:20:24,781 --> 00:20:28,115 I mean, bottom musically. Musically speaking. 405 00:20:28,117 --> 00:20:29,782 - Hmm. - It's a bass clef 406 00:20:29,784 --> 00:20:33,687 and a treble clef upside down, and it makes a heart. 407 00:20:33,689 --> 00:20:35,121 You sure it's okay if we come out there? 408 00:20:35,123 --> 00:20:37,724 Uh, you made her a musical heart, 409 00:20:37,726 --> 00:20:39,961 yes, yes, of course you should come. Duh. 410 00:20:39,963 --> 00:20:42,062 Okay. What about you, Nicky? 411 00:20:42,064 --> 00:20:43,466 Oh. 412 00:20:45,734 --> 00:20:48,038 I would love to see you at Christmas. 413 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,940 And in conclusion, 414 00:20:52,942 --> 00:20:56,010 with the addition of the extra power generator 415 00:20:56,012 --> 00:20:58,980 providing us with 500 more amps. 416 00:20:58,982 --> 00:21:04,050 The power output of our display comes to a total, 417 00:21:04,052 --> 00:21:06,654 one million watts. 418 00:21:06,656 --> 00:21:08,121 Whoa! 419 00:21:08,123 --> 00:21:09,592 Oh! 420 00:21:11,727 --> 00:21:15,730 This may be the year that our display 421 00:21:15,732 --> 00:21:17,764 will be seen from space. 422 00:21:20,936 --> 00:21:22,703 You got jingle balls, Dad. 423 00:21:22,705 --> 00:21:25,071 Rudy! 424 00:21:25,073 --> 00:21:27,074 Noelle, why are you laughing? 425 00:21:27,076 --> 00:21:29,876 I don't know. 426 00:21:29,878 --> 00:21:32,748 And the best part of all 427 00:21:33,182 --> 00:21:35,649 is, this. 428 00:21:37,052 --> 00:21:40,387 Ha? Ah! See? 429 00:21:41,491 --> 00:21:45,662 You control exactly how it moves. 430 00:21:46,728 --> 00:21:47,895 Now, uh... 431 00:21:47,897 --> 00:21:49,829 Nicky, obviously, you're the only one 432 00:21:49,831 --> 00:21:51,165 in the family with the dance moves 433 00:21:51,167 --> 00:21:53,867 who could do Santa's big number at the end of the tour. 434 00:21:53,869 --> 00:21:57,070 So you're gonna have to operate it all night. 435 00:21:57,072 --> 00:21:59,074 Can I talk to you and mom for a smidge? 436 00:22:00,877 --> 00:22:01,942 Privately. 437 00:22:01,944 --> 00:22:03,242 - Oh. - Good. 438 00:22:03,244 --> 00:22:05,111 Because we actually wanted to talk to you too. 439 00:22:05,113 --> 00:22:06,379 Hmm. 440 00:22:06,381 --> 00:22:08,883 We're gonna need the room a minute, Noelle. 441 00:22:08,885 --> 00:22:09,983 You too. 442 00:22:09,985 --> 00:22:11,952 So that's how it's gonna be? 443 00:22:11,954 --> 00:22:13,154 Bye. 444 00:22:15,224 --> 00:22:18,826 - What I wanted to say was... - Thank you. 445 00:22:18,828 --> 00:22:20,094 - What? - Thank you. 446 00:22:20,096 --> 00:22:21,194 Thank you? 447 00:22:21,196 --> 00:22:22,963 For all the great Christmases. 448 00:22:22,965 --> 00:22:24,130 You're welcome. 449 00:22:24,132 --> 00:22:25,464 But we really wanna keep this on you. 450 00:22:25,466 --> 00:22:28,469 We want you to know that as much fun as Christmas is, 451 00:22:28,471 --> 00:22:29,569 we also know it's a lot of work. 452 00:22:29,571 --> 00:22:30,937 - A lot of fun work. - A lot of work 453 00:22:30,939 --> 00:22:32,205 that you didn't sign up for, but you do it anyway. 454 00:22:32,207 --> 00:22:35,408 And we just wanted to say thank you so much 455 00:22:35,410 --> 00:22:37,110 for being an amazing daughter. 456 00:22:37,112 --> 00:22:39,413 And allowing our family to be who we are. 457 00:22:39,415 --> 00:22:40,580 Especially, this year. 458 00:22:40,582 --> 00:22:43,652 Yeah, about that. Look, I was thinking... 459 00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:46,154 Wait. Why this year? 460 00:22:46,156 --> 00:22:48,923 - Uh, because of Noelle. - She's seven. 461 00:22:48,925 --> 00:22:51,157 Seven is the perfect age to experience Christmas. 462 00:22:51,159 --> 00:22:52,792 You're young enough to see the magic. 463 00:22:52,794 --> 00:22:54,462 Uh, some of us never grow out of it. 464 00:22:54,464 --> 00:22:57,098 But old enough to understand the deeper meaning. 465 00:22:57,100 --> 00:22:58,499 Christmas as a seven-year-old 466 00:22:58,501 --> 00:23:00,134 is a once in a lifetime experience. 467 00:23:00,136 --> 00:23:02,435 You and Rudy had yours. 468 00:23:02,437 --> 00:23:04,206 - This year belongs to Noelle. - Hmm. 469 00:23:05,942 --> 00:23:07,942 Is there research to back that up? 470 00:23:07,944 --> 00:23:08,945 Oh. 471 00:23:14,117 --> 00:23:16,850 Oh. 472 00:23:16,852 --> 00:23:18,220 So what did you want to talk to us about, sweetie? 473 00:23:19,921 --> 00:23:25,526 Just about how much I love our Christmases. 474 00:23:25,528 --> 00:23:27,528 Aww! 475 00:23:27,530 --> 00:23:28,628 - Get in here. - Hey, come over. 476 00:23:28,630 --> 00:23:34,704 ♪ And a Happy New Year ♪ 477 00:23:35,871 --> 00:23:37,105 Steph, there's gotta be another way. 478 00:23:37,107 --> 00:23:39,139 Noelle can still have a magical Christmas 479 00:23:39,141 --> 00:23:41,776 without this massive lighting display. 480 00:23:41,778 --> 00:23:44,177 And why didn't you tell them that? 481 00:23:44,179 --> 00:23:47,114 Uh, you should've seen the looks on their faces. 482 00:23:47,116 --> 00:23:48,782 You're stuck between a Christmas tree 483 00:23:48,784 --> 00:23:49,817 and a hard place. 484 00:23:49,819 --> 00:23:50,984 If your dad makes 485 00:23:50,986 --> 00:23:52,752 a bigger lighting display than before. 486 00:23:52,754 --> 00:23:56,156 Tanner and his dad will see it before the plane even lands. 487 00:23:56,158 --> 00:23:58,492 No, I know. It's a hazard. 488 00:23:59,395 --> 00:24:01,127 That's it! 489 00:24:01,129 --> 00:24:02,797 You're a genius. 490 00:24:02,799 --> 00:24:03,800 Aw! 491 00:24:05,201 --> 00:24:06,533 I'm a genius. 492 00:24:06,535 --> 00:24:08,202 No, no, no! 493 00:24:14,577 --> 00:24:18,181 Thank you so much, for meeting with me, Councilman. 494 00:24:19,115 --> 00:24:22,515 This family must be stopped. 495 00:24:22,517 --> 00:24:25,251 This is the car crash that happened three years ago 496 00:24:25,253 --> 00:24:28,121 because motorist were watching the family's Christmas display 497 00:24:28,123 --> 00:24:30,158 in the front of the house, instead of the road. 498 00:24:31,224 --> 00:24:33,059 And then, 12,000 homes lost power 499 00:24:33,061 --> 00:24:36,765 because this family's display overloaded the grid. 500 00:24:38,935 --> 00:24:40,934 Well, that's not a very good picture 501 00:24:40,936 --> 00:24:42,869 because all the lights were out. 502 00:24:42,871 --> 00:24:44,871 What about all this wasted energy? 503 00:24:44,873 --> 00:24:47,140 What kind of a planet are we leaving 504 00:24:47,142 --> 00:24:48,408 for Christmases in the future? 505 00:24:48,410 --> 00:24:52,078 So, Councilman Hecht, as a concerned citizen 506 00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:54,147 who is in no way connected to this family, 507 00:24:54,149 --> 00:24:58,351 I urge you to order the police to enforce these existing laws 508 00:24:58,353 --> 00:25:01,924 that prohibit massive Christmas displays like this. 509 00:25:03,192 --> 00:25:05,729 But polls show people like Christmas. 510 00:25:06,896 --> 00:25:09,128 There's an obscure but valid law 511 00:25:09,130 --> 00:25:11,999 against this many lights at one house. 512 00:25:12,001 --> 00:25:15,071 But also, people don't like it when obscure laws are enforced. 513 00:25:16,138 --> 00:25:18,071 But it's the right thing to do. 514 00:25:18,073 --> 00:25:20,007 Polls show that the right thing to do 515 00:25:20,009 --> 00:25:22,011 is not the popular thing to do. 516 00:25:23,279 --> 00:25:26,012 Why do you care so much about polls? 517 00:25:26,014 --> 00:25:27,282 There's an election coming up. 518 00:25:31,286 --> 00:25:32,955 I'll give you a hundred bucks... 519 00:25:34,623 --> 00:25:35,958 for your campaign. 520 00:25:41,898 --> 00:25:43,062 - Oh, no. - Why? 521 00:25:43,064 --> 00:25:44,665 Is everything okay, Dad? 522 00:25:44,667 --> 00:25:47,667 No. This is a court order prohibiting us 523 00:25:47,669 --> 00:25:50,037 from doing our normal Christmas display. 524 00:25:50,039 --> 00:25:52,106 It... It limits our wattage, 525 00:25:52,108 --> 00:25:54,674 - and the height of our tree. - But why? 526 00:25:54,676 --> 00:25:58,111 Apparently, there some obscure city ordinance about, 527 00:25:58,113 --> 00:26:00,313 "ostentatious Christmas displays." 528 00:26:00,315 --> 00:26:03,051 I hate it when obscure laws are enforced. 529 00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:05,552 And right when we're about 530 00:26:05,554 --> 00:26:07,421 to have Noelle's most special Christmas ever. 531 00:26:07,423 --> 00:26:11,058 What kind of monster would do this to us? 532 00:26:11,060 --> 00:26:13,193 Oh, my... 533 00:26:13,195 --> 00:26:15,296 What kinda world are we living in? 534 00:26:15,298 --> 00:26:16,329 You know what, maybe we'll cut down 535 00:26:16,331 --> 00:26:17,998 - on the inflatables. - Hey, Dad! 536 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:19,199 Look. 537 00:26:19,201 --> 00:26:20,701 - Oh! - It's your hat. 538 00:26:20,703 --> 00:26:23,203 Oh, thank you, sweetie. 539 00:26:23,205 --> 00:26:26,005 Oh, if ever I needed a magical Santa hat 540 00:26:26,007 --> 00:26:28,008 now would be the time. 541 00:26:28,010 --> 00:26:30,344 Hey, buddy, what have you got for me? 542 00:26:30,346 --> 00:26:31,945 Chris, it's gonna be okay. 543 00:26:31,947 --> 00:26:33,215 Shh! I'm talking to the hat. 544 00:26:34,215 --> 00:26:35,382 Tell me what to do. 545 00:26:35,384 --> 00:26:37,353 I hope this isn't hereditary. 546 00:26:38,654 --> 00:26:41,055 Chris, are you all right? 547 00:26:41,057 --> 00:26:44,426 Actually, I'm better than all right. 548 00:26:45,360 --> 00:26:46,726 Chris, what are you doing? 549 00:26:46,728 --> 00:26:49,996 Uh, you remember that thing I built in college? 550 00:26:49,998 --> 00:26:52,098 - What thing? - The Christmas thing. 551 00:26:52,100 --> 00:26:53,701 You've built a million Christmas things. 552 00:26:56,171 --> 00:26:58,739 Oh, that Christmas thing. 553 00:26:58,741 --> 00:27:00,707 Can you believe I almost threw this away? 554 00:27:00,709 --> 00:27:02,444 Okay. 555 00:27:03,244 --> 00:27:04,914 Behold. 556 00:27:06,081 --> 00:27:07,513 The Christmas cave. 557 00:27:07,515 --> 00:27:09,384 - Cool, Dad! - Mm-hmm. 558 00:27:10,285 --> 00:27:11,452 Pretty. 559 00:27:11,454 --> 00:27:12,686 Christmas cave? 560 00:27:12,688 --> 00:27:15,289 - That's not a thing. - Yet. Not a thing yet. 561 00:27:15,291 --> 00:27:16,589 How do you think a thing becomes a thing. 562 00:27:16,591 --> 00:27:18,325 If nobody ever did a thing that wasn't a thing 563 00:27:18,327 --> 00:27:20,260 there would be no things. 564 00:27:20,262 --> 00:27:22,730 So we're gonna dig a hole in the backyard? 565 00:27:22,732 --> 00:27:25,165 No. No, Nicky. 566 00:27:25,167 --> 00:27:27,467 We are going to build this. 567 00:27:27,469 --> 00:27:31,137 A huge outdoor ice cave. 568 00:27:31,139 --> 00:27:34,241 And we're gonna put our family Christmas display inside 569 00:27:34,243 --> 00:27:36,510 with the hologram Santa at the end. 570 00:27:36,512 --> 00:27:40,481 Absolutely zero wattage will be seen from the outside, 571 00:27:40,483 --> 00:27:43,416 but when people enter the cave... 572 00:27:45,221 --> 00:27:48,422 Oh, they will get the full effect 573 00:27:48,424 --> 00:27:50,960 of our family's Christmas spirit. 574 00:27:52,360 --> 00:27:54,228 Uh, is there gonna be trolls in the cave? 575 00:27:54,230 --> 00:27:55,462 No, Noelle. No trolls. 576 00:27:55,464 --> 00:27:57,431 But trolls live in caves. 577 00:27:57,433 --> 00:27:59,098 Trolls live under bridges. 578 00:27:59,100 --> 00:28:00,567 You guys really need to get more involved 579 00:28:00,569 --> 00:28:02,071 with her education. 580 00:28:04,305 --> 00:28:07,509 I was kicked out of dental school. 581 00:28:09,445 --> 00:28:11,310 This city ordinance is the best thing 582 00:28:11,312 --> 00:28:12,745 that ever happened to us. 583 00:28:12,747 --> 00:28:16,282 We start construction tomorrow. 584 00:28:20,321 --> 00:28:22,455 Okay, I'm gonna have you work on the west wing first, okay? 585 00:28:22,457 --> 00:28:24,390 'Cause you're working with hammers and nails. 586 00:28:24,392 --> 00:28:27,126 I'm going to eat this soup and then I'm going to die. 587 00:28:27,128 --> 00:28:29,463 That's quite the to-do list. 588 00:28:29,465 --> 00:28:31,531 When Tanner and his dad see the Christmas cave, 589 00:28:31,533 --> 00:28:33,032 his dad will get PTSD, 590 00:28:33,034 --> 00:28:35,435 Tanner will relive the horror of his mom leaving at Christmas, 591 00:28:35,437 --> 00:28:37,203 and then I will murder my family. 592 00:28:37,205 --> 00:28:39,306 So I should die first to avoid all that. 593 00:28:39,308 --> 00:28:41,140 I can't argue with that logic. 594 00:28:41,142 --> 00:28:44,110 Why can't I just have a normal family? 595 00:28:44,112 --> 00:28:45,280 Oh! 596 00:29:01,397 --> 00:29:04,298 - Dad? - Yes, my son. 597 00:29:04,300 --> 00:29:05,799 When I grow up will I be responsible 598 00:29:05,801 --> 00:29:07,867 for Christmas, like you? 599 00:29:07,869 --> 00:29:10,104 Well, if that's what you want. 600 00:29:10,106 --> 00:29:12,806 And if you're lucky enough to find a young lady 601 00:29:12,808 --> 00:29:14,444 that loves Christmas like your mother. 602 00:29:15,811 --> 00:29:18,311 Well, then I should know some stuff. 603 00:29:18,313 --> 00:29:21,181 Well, all right. 604 00:29:21,183 --> 00:29:22,549 Ask me anything. 605 00:29:22,551 --> 00:29:24,651 Hm, you seem to spend a lot of time on Christmas. 606 00:29:24,653 --> 00:29:26,552 Oh, you bet I do. 607 00:29:26,554 --> 00:29:28,291 But what about your job? 608 00:29:29,657 --> 00:29:32,526 Well, that has come up. 609 00:29:32,528 --> 00:29:35,361 But I tell them the season is a priority to me. 610 00:29:35,363 --> 00:29:36,597 And they respect that. 611 00:29:36,599 --> 00:29:38,264 - Cool! - Oh, sure, 612 00:29:38,266 --> 00:29:40,166 Stu gets a promotion even though 613 00:29:40,168 --> 00:29:43,136 I've been with the company longer than him. 614 00:29:43,138 --> 00:29:44,404 - I got it... - And Laura leapfrogged 615 00:29:44,406 --> 00:29:45,206 right over me. 616 00:29:46,407 --> 00:29:47,640 - Okay. - I'm not even sure 617 00:29:47,642 --> 00:29:49,576 anyone there knows my name. 618 00:29:49,578 --> 00:29:54,580 But that's not important because Christmas comes first. 619 00:29:54,582 --> 00:29:57,285 And exactly how much do we spend on Christmas a year? 620 00:29:59,155 --> 00:30:00,521 Well, uh... 621 00:30:00,523 --> 00:30:02,655 I don't... I don't think you need to know the exact... 622 00:30:02,657 --> 00:30:04,558 'Cause all this Christmas stuff seems pretty expensive. 623 00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:05,759 Okay, you know what, I don't think 624 00:30:05,761 --> 00:30:06,827 I really wanna talk about this anymore. 625 00:30:06,829 --> 00:30:09,363 Are you saving money for college? 626 00:30:09,365 --> 00:30:10,396 You've got three kids. 627 00:30:10,398 --> 00:30:12,465 And if you keep asking me questions 628 00:30:12,467 --> 00:30:14,403 it's going to be two kids. 629 00:30:20,176 --> 00:30:21,642 I gotcha! 630 00:30:21,644 --> 00:30:23,476 Yeah, look at your face! 631 00:30:23,478 --> 00:30:25,913 You were like, "Ah!" 632 00:30:25,915 --> 00:30:28,315 - Good one, Dad. - Oh, I know. 633 00:30:28,317 --> 00:30:29,484 Oh, hey. 634 00:30:32,921 --> 00:30:34,721 Why are you putting antlers on a bat? 635 00:30:34,723 --> 00:30:37,657 Uh. Well, we're making a Christmas cave, right? 636 00:30:37,659 --> 00:30:38,526 Right. 637 00:30:38,528 --> 00:30:41,197 And what animals live in a cave? 638 00:30:41,730 --> 00:30:42,930 Bears. 639 00:30:42,932 --> 00:30:44,932 Yes. And? 640 00:30:44,934 --> 00:30:46,332 Other bears. 641 00:30:46,334 --> 00:30:48,501 No. Not... not bears. 642 00:30:50,539 --> 00:30:52,638 - Bats! - Yes. 643 00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:54,907 Come on, Rudy. You're in the fifth grade. 644 00:30:54,909 --> 00:30:57,411 And which animal is most associated 645 00:30:57,413 --> 00:30:58,478 with Christmas? 646 00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:00,213 - Reindeer. - Yeah! 647 00:31:00,215 --> 00:31:01,281 Uh, side question. 648 00:31:01,283 --> 00:31:02,482 What do you call more than one reindeer. 649 00:31:02,484 --> 00:31:04,952 Reindeer. The plural is the same as the singular. 650 00:31:04,954 --> 00:31:06,522 That's my boy. Hmm. 651 00:31:08,623 --> 00:31:11,224 So, this is going to be a reindeer bat? 652 00:31:11,226 --> 00:31:12,326 Exactly. 653 00:31:12,328 --> 00:31:14,360 The first one in the world. 654 00:31:14,362 --> 00:31:16,762 It's gonna make our cave even that much more Christmassy. 655 00:31:16,764 --> 00:31:19,232 - Good thinking. - Yeah. 656 00:31:19,234 --> 00:31:20,767 How about throw in a Christmas bear, too? 657 00:31:20,769 --> 00:31:22,735 Okay. See, here's the problem, Rudy. 658 00:31:22,737 --> 00:31:25,771 Bears hibernate during the winter. 659 00:31:25,773 --> 00:31:27,507 Now we would look pretty stupid 660 00:31:27,509 --> 00:31:30,978 if we had an awake bear in our Christmas cave. 661 00:31:30,980 --> 00:31:32,779 Right. Sorry, Dad. Of course. 662 00:31:32,781 --> 00:31:34,117 No worries. 663 00:31:35,384 --> 00:31:36,582 A Christmas wolf. 664 00:31:36,584 --> 00:31:39,418 Okay, Rudy, we're doing reindeer bats this year. 665 00:31:39,420 --> 00:31:41,621 That's it. Okay? 666 00:31:41,623 --> 00:31:43,458 - Makes total sense. - Yes, it does. 667 00:31:45,660 --> 00:31:46,859 - Dad? - Hmm? 668 00:31:46,861 --> 00:31:48,595 Is this reindeer bat like the Christmas cave, 669 00:31:48,597 --> 00:31:49,663 where it's not a thing yet 670 00:31:49,665 --> 00:31:52,432 but if we do it, it does become a thing? 671 00:31:52,434 --> 00:31:54,401 Because if no one ever did a thing that wasn't a thing, 672 00:31:54,403 --> 00:31:55,571 then there'd be no things. 673 00:31:58,006 --> 00:31:59,274 Yes, son. 674 00:31:59,975 --> 00:32:01,276 Yes, it is. 675 00:32:04,679 --> 00:32:05,715 Cool. 676 00:32:10,819 --> 00:32:13,489 Do you see how quickly they built this? 677 00:32:14,423 --> 00:32:16,556 - Hey, Dad. - Hey. 678 00:32:16,558 --> 00:32:18,291 Now where did I put that tensile. 679 00:32:18,293 --> 00:32:21,528 Well, it's almost finished. 680 00:32:21,530 --> 00:32:23,562 As is my life. 681 00:32:23,564 --> 00:32:25,331 Tanner is gonna be here in three days. 682 00:32:25,333 --> 00:32:26,700 What the hell am I gonna do? 683 00:32:26,702 --> 00:32:27,768 You could always tell them your parents 684 00:32:27,770 --> 00:32:28,969 are out of town and meet them at Denny's 685 00:32:28,971 --> 00:32:30,703 - for your Christmas Eve dinner. - Oh! 686 00:32:30,705 --> 00:32:31,805 That sounds depressing. 687 00:32:31,807 --> 00:32:34,640 Not as depressing as this. 688 00:32:34,642 --> 00:32:36,676 You want me to lie to the boy that I love? 689 00:32:36,678 --> 00:32:38,212 Yeah. 690 00:32:38,214 --> 00:32:41,184 Well, I would, but he already knows my parents are in town. 691 00:32:42,751 --> 00:32:44,350 Hi, Mrs. Franklin. 692 00:32:44,352 --> 00:32:46,819 Hello, Nicky. 693 00:32:46,821 --> 00:32:48,722 Stephanie, you remember our neighbor, Mrs. Franklin. 694 00:32:48,724 --> 00:32:50,156 Oh, yeah. Hi. 695 00:32:50,158 --> 00:32:51,625 Nicky, since thousands of people will descend on our street 696 00:32:51,627 --> 00:32:55,431 to see your Christmas cave, which by the way is not a thing. 697 00:32:56,064 --> 00:32:57,463 That's what I said. 698 00:32:57,465 --> 00:32:59,499 I'll be checking in to a hotel 'till after Christmas 699 00:32:59,501 --> 00:33:00,834 to preserve my sanity. 700 00:33:00,836 --> 00:33:03,736 That means I need you to catsit little Parsley here. 701 00:33:06,407 --> 00:33:08,375 Please check on Parsley twice a day. 702 00:33:08,377 --> 00:33:10,676 He has feline solitude incontinence syndrome, 703 00:33:10,678 --> 00:33:13,480 so if you don't pay attention to him he, you know... 704 00:33:14,582 --> 00:33:16,616 Urinates everywhere. Right. I know. 705 00:33:16,618 --> 00:33:18,751 You always do a good job, young lady. 706 00:33:18,753 --> 00:33:21,555 How are you the offspring of that crazy father of yours 707 00:33:21,557 --> 00:33:23,423 - I'll never know. - Hmm. 708 00:33:23,425 --> 00:33:25,358 I guess insanity skips a generation. 709 00:33:25,360 --> 00:33:26,659 Let's hope. 710 00:33:26,661 --> 00:33:28,361 See you in a week. 711 00:33:28,363 --> 00:33:29,829 Oh, my god. 712 00:33:29,831 --> 00:33:31,431 That's the cat you were telling me about, 713 00:33:31,433 --> 00:33:32,732 the one that pees on everything. 714 00:33:32,734 --> 00:33:34,100 Yup. That's Parsley. 715 00:33:34,102 --> 00:33:36,636 He should be called Pissy. 716 00:33:36,638 --> 00:33:39,138 Well, the good news is, he only pees when he's lonely, 717 00:33:39,140 --> 00:33:40,272 which is all the time. 718 00:33:40,274 --> 00:33:41,674 And then, I have to clean it all up. 719 00:33:41,676 --> 00:33:44,144 You could always sneak him into the neighbor's house. 720 00:33:44,146 --> 00:33:47,250 The Crenshaws seem pretty gross and they might not notice. 721 00:33:48,850 --> 00:33:51,117 Steph... 722 00:33:51,119 --> 00:33:53,119 Do you know what I could do with these keys? 723 00:33:53,121 --> 00:33:55,688 Let yourself into a urine soaked house? 724 00:33:55,690 --> 00:33:58,625 I haven't given Tanner my address yet. 725 00:33:58,627 --> 00:34:00,460 I could give him the address of the next door. 726 00:34:00,462 --> 00:34:01,560 And we could have dinner there 727 00:34:01,562 --> 00:34:03,629 instead of here with my crazy family. 728 00:34:03,631 --> 00:34:04,463 That is some seriously 729 00:34:04,465 --> 00:34:05,531 evil genius stuff, Nicky. 730 00:34:05,533 --> 00:34:07,800 - And I love it, but, um... - What? 731 00:34:07,802 --> 00:34:10,704 Isn't Tanner expecting to meet your parents? 732 00:34:10,706 --> 00:34:13,607 Well, maybe it's time we put all those improv classes to use. 733 00:34:13,609 --> 00:34:16,409 We hire actors to play my parents. 734 00:34:16,411 --> 00:34:17,777 We hire actors? 735 00:34:17,779 --> 00:34:19,413 Oh, that's brilliant. 736 00:34:19,415 --> 00:34:20,880 And we could use our pro-improv skills 737 00:34:20,882 --> 00:34:21,982 to direct them. 738 00:34:21,984 --> 00:34:24,884 Yes! This is gonna be so much fun. 739 00:34:24,886 --> 00:34:28,154 And we'll never see my crazy, stupid Christmas family. 740 00:34:28,156 --> 00:34:30,157 Stephanie and Nicky save the day. 741 00:34:30,159 --> 00:34:33,427 All thanks to Pissy the cat. 742 00:34:33,429 --> 00:34:34,795 You're sure your parents don't care 743 00:34:34,797 --> 00:34:36,429 if we use your house, Steph? 744 00:34:36,431 --> 00:34:38,498 They might care if they knew. 745 00:34:42,638 --> 00:34:44,572 Mm! 746 00:34:48,610 --> 00:34:50,976 Quite an impressive turnout. 747 00:34:50,978 --> 00:34:53,447 I know right? I guess we're the only thing casting 748 00:34:53,449 --> 00:34:54,713 in Santa Clarita for Christmas Eve. 749 00:34:54,715 --> 00:34:56,516 Go figure, right? 750 00:34:56,518 --> 00:34:57,884 Um, did you ever figure out 751 00:34:57,886 --> 00:34:59,284 how to work the hologram thing without being there? 752 00:34:59,286 --> 00:35:01,855 Archie from computer club says he can make a program 753 00:35:01,857 --> 00:35:03,456 that puts it on auto Santa. 754 00:35:03,458 --> 00:35:04,493 Great! 755 00:35:08,464 --> 00:35:10,797 Steph, this is crazy, we're not gonna have enough time. 756 00:35:10,799 --> 00:35:12,732 Hey, we totally got this. 757 00:35:12,734 --> 00:35:14,733 We'll plow through the auditions, 758 00:35:14,735 --> 00:35:16,837 whip the actors into shape while you spend Christmas Eve 759 00:35:16,839 --> 00:35:18,471 with your fam in the Christmas cave. 760 00:35:18,473 --> 00:35:19,540 No one will be the wiser 761 00:35:19,542 --> 00:35:20,907 when Tanner and his dad show up tonight. 762 00:35:20,909 --> 00:35:22,241 Honestly, I wish 763 00:35:22,243 --> 00:35:24,177 we had rash medicine commercial to cast on the side 764 00:35:24,179 --> 00:35:25,881 because this just seems too easy. 765 00:35:28,250 --> 00:35:29,616 All right. 766 00:35:29,618 --> 00:35:31,250 - Let's do this. - Good. 767 00:35:34,922 --> 00:35:36,422 "Hello, Tanner. 768 00:35:36,424 --> 00:35:40,527 It is so nice to finally meet the boy that my daughter met 769 00:35:40,529 --> 00:35:41,697 last summer." 770 00:35:42,897 --> 00:35:44,764 - That was great. - Yeah. 771 00:35:44,766 --> 00:35:47,500 There's not going to be a script for the actual performance 772 00:35:47,502 --> 00:35:48,934 just a lot of improv. 773 00:35:48,936 --> 00:35:50,369 Improv? 774 00:35:50,371 --> 00:35:52,838 Yeah, so why don't you go ahead and improv with Stephanie 775 00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:55,509 right now, she'll pretend to be Tanner's dad. 776 00:35:55,511 --> 00:35:59,447 So, Mrs. Winters, I hear your daughter plays the tuba. 777 00:36:01,782 --> 00:36:02,916 Hello? 778 00:36:15,697 --> 00:36:17,264 - I'm gonna go with no on her. - Mm. 779 00:36:17,266 --> 00:36:18,532 Yeah, okay. 780 00:36:18,534 --> 00:36:20,699 So I know the ad said that it's a paid gig, 781 00:36:20,701 --> 00:36:22,936 but I can only afford to pay 50 dollars. 782 00:36:22,938 --> 00:36:24,371 Pay us? 783 00:36:24,373 --> 00:36:26,739 Could maybe pay little bit more if there was fight scene, 784 00:36:26,741 --> 00:36:29,074 I can even fight myself. Here just... just watch. 785 00:36:29,076 --> 00:36:30,478 Just... 786 00:36:33,281 --> 00:36:36,715 Oh, my... 787 00:36:36,717 --> 00:36:39,552 Uh, it's a little something I invented called 788 00:36:39,554 --> 00:36:40,753 a stop monologue. 789 00:36:40,755 --> 00:36:43,024 - It's copyrighted. - Ah. 790 00:36:43,958 --> 00:36:44,991 No. 791 00:36:44,993 --> 00:36:47,826 So, I think I can dance. 792 00:36:48,964 --> 00:36:51,030 Oh, no! He's too hip-hop. 793 00:36:51,032 --> 00:36:54,800 No, um, there's no dancing involved in this role. 794 00:36:56,071 --> 00:36:57,637 And then I was in Fiddler on the Roof. 795 00:36:57,639 --> 00:37:00,574 The original production. 796 00:37:00,576 --> 00:37:02,978 And I play the fiddler before he got out of the roof. 797 00:37:04,612 --> 00:37:07,646 Thank you so much for coming in. 798 00:37:07,648 --> 00:37:10,784 I wore the mat that had played the roof. 799 00:37:10,786 --> 00:37:13,954 - That makes no sense. - I know, I'm Jewish. It doesn't. 800 00:37:13,956 --> 00:37:15,721 Would you like to hear my English accent? 801 00:37:15,723 --> 00:37:17,657 My father's not English. 802 00:37:17,659 --> 00:37:19,692 Uh, hello, guv'nor. 803 00:37:19,694 --> 00:37:20,726 What-o! 804 00:37:20,728 --> 00:37:22,996 Chim, chim, cher-ee! 805 00:37:22,998 --> 00:37:25,067 Can you believe, I've never even been to England. 806 00:37:27,768 --> 00:37:28,934 - Yes. - Mm. 807 00:37:28,936 --> 00:37:32,507 I also sing the greatest music of all. 808 00:37:35,009 --> 00:37:36,710 Campfire songs. 809 00:37:36,712 --> 00:37:40,346 ♪ Oh, Susanna Oh, don't you cry for me ♪ 810 00:37:40,348 --> 00:37:42,648 How the hell did a Broadway actor 811 00:37:42,650 --> 00:37:44,817 end up in Santa Clarita, you may ask. 812 00:37:44,819 --> 00:37:46,554 - I really don't... - Go ahead, ask. 813 00:37:51,826 --> 00:37:53,860 How did a Broadway actor end... 814 00:37:53,862 --> 00:37:55,895 Timing! You think timing. 815 00:37:55,897 --> 00:37:58,331 I interrupted you in the middle of you asking me a question. 816 00:37:58,333 --> 00:38:00,936 Ask me again, it's always funny. 817 00:38:03,170 --> 00:38:05,371 Please, please, I need this. All right. 818 00:38:05,373 --> 00:38:07,007 Look, let me be the understudy. 819 00:38:07,009 --> 00:38:09,175 Look, I... I'll be a great understudy. 820 00:38:09,177 --> 00:38:11,143 Does the part require nudity? 821 00:38:11,145 --> 00:38:13,045 Because I prefer it. 822 00:38:13,047 --> 00:38:15,715 Full frontal if possible. 823 00:38:15,717 --> 00:38:18,050 And in conclusion, I just want to tell you 824 00:38:18,052 --> 00:38:20,887 how pleased I am to meet Nicky's boyfriend. 825 00:38:20,889 --> 00:38:22,925 And that, I too am not keen on Christmas. 826 00:38:24,726 --> 00:38:26,659 You nailed it. 827 00:38:27,795 --> 00:38:29,429 Thank you, you are too kind. 828 00:38:29,431 --> 00:38:31,197 Are you available to be my dad full-time? 829 00:38:31,199 --> 00:38:33,933 Just kidding. Mostly. 830 00:38:33,935 --> 00:38:35,768 Anyway, you're hired. 831 00:38:35,770 --> 00:38:38,371 And you're all right that this gig is for tonight? 832 00:38:38,373 --> 00:38:40,072 I know it's Christmas Eve. 833 00:38:40,074 --> 00:38:42,675 Are you kidding? Christmas is here. 834 00:38:42,677 --> 00:38:43,679 Acting... 835 00:38:44,446 --> 00:38:45,648 is here. 836 00:38:47,748 --> 00:38:49,449 - Mm. - Commitment to the craft. 837 00:38:49,451 --> 00:38:50,349 I like that. 838 00:38:50,351 --> 00:38:52,851 I humbly accept this position. 839 00:38:52,853 --> 00:38:54,186 Quick question though, 840 00:38:54,188 --> 00:38:55,121 will I have to be drinking alcohol in this gig? 841 00:38:55,123 --> 00:38:56,588 - No. - Oh, good. 842 00:38:56,590 --> 00:39:00,159 Wouldn't want to set off the old alcohol monitoring bracelet. 843 00:39:03,964 --> 00:39:05,165 It's fine. 844 00:39:05,167 --> 00:39:07,069 I'm hired, right? 845 00:39:08,837 --> 00:39:10,804 I also need a ride home. 846 00:39:10,806 --> 00:39:12,237 No. 847 00:39:12,239 --> 00:39:15,241 Ms. James, it is so great to see you. 848 00:39:15,243 --> 00:39:16,641 Well, it's great to see you... 849 00:39:16,643 --> 00:39:20,746 Do I... do I know you, were you in one of my classes? 850 00:39:20,748 --> 00:39:23,882 Uh. 851 00:39:23,884 --> 00:39:26,719 That's so funny. Isn't it funny? 852 00:39:26,721 --> 00:39:28,154 She's not joking, is she? 853 00:39:28,156 --> 00:39:29,788 - Mm-mm - Okay, yes. Yes! 854 00:39:29,790 --> 00:39:32,058 Yes, I'm in all of your classes. 855 00:39:32,060 --> 00:39:35,962 They're my favorite. Took them last year, too. 856 00:39:35,964 --> 00:39:39,132 Yes, you showed great promise. 857 00:39:39,134 --> 00:39:40,733 I wanna say... 858 00:39:40,735 --> 00:39:42,168 Saaar... 859 00:39:42,170 --> 00:39:43,770 Stephanie 860 00:39:43,772 --> 00:39:45,771 - Stephanie. - Stephanie. 861 00:39:45,773 --> 00:39:47,040 Of course, your name is Stephanie. 862 00:39:47,042 --> 00:39:49,808 Yeah. Yeah, I swept up after every rehearsal. 863 00:39:49,810 --> 00:39:53,145 I actually, knitted that sweater you're currently wearing, 864 00:39:53,147 --> 00:39:55,949 I started that Facebook fan club for you. 865 00:39:55,951 --> 00:39:57,150 Now it's coming back to me. 866 00:39:57,152 --> 00:39:58,317 I remember. You're the one 867 00:39:58,319 --> 00:39:59,619 who always wanted to do the kissing scenes 868 00:39:59,621 --> 00:40:01,920 with all the handsome boys. Uh, shame on you. 869 00:40:01,922 --> 00:40:03,822 - That's our Steph. - That's me. 870 00:40:03,824 --> 00:40:05,157 I want you to know that I've read the material, 871 00:40:05,159 --> 00:40:07,196 I have absorbed the character, I am... 872 00:40:08,864 --> 00:40:10,764 very good at improv... 873 00:40:10,766 --> 00:40:13,766 The imagination is limitless. 874 00:40:13,768 --> 00:40:15,768 If you let it be ladies. 875 00:40:15,770 --> 00:40:17,003 Great! Then let's improv. 876 00:40:17,005 --> 00:40:20,643 I'll be Nicky's boyfriend's dad. Okay, got it? 877 00:40:22,076 --> 00:40:23,476 Let's all do a breath. 878 00:40:25,947 --> 00:40:28,148 I have a deviated septum so it's harder to get it in. 879 00:40:28,150 --> 00:40:30,753 Don't breathe out. Don't breathe out. 880 00:40:31,252 --> 00:40:32,951 No breathe out. 881 00:40:32,953 --> 00:40:34,052 Breathe out. 882 00:40:34,054 --> 00:40:37,956 Let's get ready to improv! 883 00:40:39,927 --> 00:40:41,561 - Okay. Yeah. - Here we go. 884 00:40:45,299 --> 00:40:47,199 Well, hello, gentlemen, it's so nice to... 885 00:40:47,201 --> 00:40:48,701 Nicky. 886 00:40:48,703 --> 00:40:51,904 I can see where your boyfriend gets all of his charms from. 887 00:40:51,906 --> 00:40:54,940 Mrs. Winters, I heard your daughter plays the tuba. 888 00:40:54,942 --> 00:40:56,342 Uh, plays it? Mm, I dunno. 889 00:40:56,344 --> 00:40:59,012 I think she rocks the hizouse with it. 890 00:41:04,052 --> 00:41:05,451 Nice touch. 891 00:41:05,453 --> 00:41:08,087 That actually gave me legit embarrassing mom cringe. 892 00:41:08,089 --> 00:41:09,989 Well... 893 00:41:09,991 --> 00:41:11,123 I think you're perfect for the role. 894 00:41:11,125 --> 00:41:12,190 - Yeah. - You're sure you're all right 895 00:41:12,192 --> 00:41:14,259 with doing this even though it's tonight 896 00:41:14,261 --> 00:41:15,895 and it's Christmas Eve? 897 00:41:15,897 --> 00:41:18,096 Christmas, uh, god. I can't stand Christmas. 898 00:41:18,098 --> 00:41:19,565 Perfect! 899 00:41:19,567 --> 00:41:21,534 What are the odds we find an actress who hates Christmas 900 00:41:21,536 --> 00:41:23,235 - as much as I do. - Right? 901 00:41:23,237 --> 00:41:26,206 I'm kidding! I love Christmas! 902 00:41:26,208 --> 00:41:28,077 I'm just a really talented actress. 903 00:41:28,944 --> 00:41:29,978 Told ya. 904 00:41:30,911 --> 00:41:32,011 Uh-huh. 905 00:41:32,013 --> 00:41:34,079 Please, I need this for my resume. 906 00:41:34,081 --> 00:41:35,380 I'm a great understudy 907 00:41:35,382 --> 00:41:36,616 and you won't even know I'm around. 908 00:41:36,618 --> 00:41:38,253 - Mm-mm. - Because I'm stealthy. 909 00:41:41,255 --> 00:41:42,257 See? 910 00:41:44,125 --> 00:41:45,291 Did I mention I can juggle? 911 00:41:45,293 --> 00:41:46,228 - Oh, my god. - No... 912 00:41:49,197 --> 00:41:50,199 Actors. 913 00:41:52,333 --> 00:41:55,134 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 914 00:41:55,136 --> 00:41:58,003 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat Yes, I do ♪ 915 00:41:58,005 --> 00:42:00,405 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat You're adorable ♪ 916 00:42:00,407 --> 00:42:03,342 ♪ Life without you Would be horrible ♪ 917 00:42:03,344 --> 00:42:06,012 ♪ No one makes me work ♪ 918 00:42:06,014 --> 00:42:08,614 ♪ Like my little bundle of fur ♪ 919 00:42:08,616 --> 00:42:14,052 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 920 00:42:14,054 --> 00:42:20,159 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 921 00:42:20,161 --> 00:42:22,898 Wow. It really is a Christmas cave. 922 00:42:25,667 --> 00:42:27,967 Okay. We need to keep these closed. 923 00:42:27,969 --> 00:42:29,168 That's the guy you're pretending to be, 924 00:42:29,170 --> 00:42:30,036 he can't see you. 925 00:42:30,038 --> 00:42:32,237 Uh, Bradley, this is Ms. James. 926 00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:34,907 - And Ms. James this... - We've met. 927 00:42:34,909 --> 00:42:37,043 We did West Side Story together. 928 00:42:37,045 --> 00:42:39,244 You played Maria to my Tony. 929 00:42:39,246 --> 00:42:41,346 You're Tony? You're Tony? 930 00:42:42,583 --> 00:42:44,150 So you guys have already played a couple. 931 00:42:44,152 --> 00:42:45,585 For one night. 932 00:42:45,587 --> 00:42:48,621 Until he was unmercifully replaced by the understudy. 933 00:42:48,623 --> 00:42:49,922 Was there a problem? 934 00:42:49,924 --> 00:42:52,257 You're not supposed to use a real switchblade. 935 00:42:52,259 --> 00:42:54,192 I was acquitted of all charges, okay? 936 00:42:54,194 --> 00:42:56,663 And replacing me with the understudy, not cool. 937 00:42:56,665 --> 00:42:58,398 Not cool. 938 00:42:58,400 --> 00:42:59,965 Still have nightmares. 939 00:42:59,967 --> 00:43:02,101 Okay! So, um, moving on. 940 00:43:02,103 --> 00:43:04,637 Uh, Bradley, you'll be playing Nicky's dad, Chris. 941 00:43:04,639 --> 00:43:07,940 And Ms. James, you'll be playing Nicky's mom, Fran. 942 00:43:07,942 --> 00:43:09,375 Fran. Got it. 943 00:43:10,777 --> 00:43:13,445 Uh, we only have about seven hours until they arrive. 944 00:43:13,447 --> 00:43:15,081 So, uh, let's rehearse. 945 00:43:15,083 --> 00:43:17,050 Uh, Nicky, you be Tanner's dad, Lance, 946 00:43:17,052 --> 00:43:18,217 and I'll be Tanner. 947 00:43:18,219 --> 00:43:20,085 And action! 948 00:43:20,087 --> 00:43:22,221 Lance, it is so nice to meet you. 949 00:43:22,223 --> 00:43:24,223 Yes, it's so nice to meet you. 950 00:43:24,225 --> 00:43:27,025 And, Tanner, what a lovely name. 951 00:43:27,027 --> 00:43:29,395 - What a lovely name. - Wait, cut. Um... 952 00:43:29,397 --> 00:43:32,498 Bradley, you're just repeating whatever Ms. James says. 953 00:43:32,500 --> 00:43:35,168 I was being a husband in tune with his wife. 954 00:43:35,170 --> 00:43:37,070 Okay, uh, well... 955 00:43:37,072 --> 00:43:39,438 Let's maybe dial that back just a little bit, okay? 956 00:43:39,440 --> 00:43:41,974 And action. 957 00:43:41,976 --> 00:43:42,942 Lance, Tanner, 958 00:43:42,944 --> 00:43:44,110 - how was your flight? - Oh. 959 00:43:44,112 --> 00:43:46,679 That's a stupid question, honey. 960 00:43:46,681 --> 00:43:49,117 And dial back on the harsh, too, please. 961 00:43:49,985 --> 00:43:51,317 Actors. 962 00:43:51,319 --> 00:43:52,454 I know. 963 00:43:53,388 --> 00:43:54,853 The flight was swell. 964 00:43:54,855 --> 00:43:58,224 Great, great. Now, what part of Connecticut are you from? 965 00:43:58,226 --> 00:44:00,425 The nice part. 966 00:44:00,427 --> 00:44:02,395 No, no, I cannot laugh at that. 967 00:44:02,397 --> 00:44:03,496 - Why not? - I don't think 968 00:44:03,498 --> 00:44:05,498 that my character would find it funny. 969 00:44:05,500 --> 00:44:09,001 Can you stop whining and just be professional? 970 00:44:09,003 --> 00:44:10,737 - Oh, professional? - Uh, yeah. 971 00:44:10,739 --> 00:44:12,438 You're a drama teacher, okay? 972 00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:15,440 You're a babysitter with a scenery budget. 973 00:44:15,442 --> 00:44:18,210 All right. I'll have you know, I was on Law & Order. 974 00:44:18,212 --> 00:44:19,779 Oh, I know. 975 00:44:19,781 --> 00:44:21,780 Because you brought the DVD to rehearsal 976 00:44:21,782 --> 00:44:23,483 and made everybody watch it. 977 00:44:23,485 --> 00:44:25,418 Your part was a member of the jury. 978 00:44:25,420 --> 00:44:27,119 Your whole part consisted 979 00:44:27,121 --> 00:44:29,489 of nodding during the testimony. This is it. 980 00:44:29,491 --> 00:44:31,491 - Look, I can nod. - Guys... 981 00:44:31,493 --> 00:44:34,494 I'll have you know, I nodded to S. Epatha Merkerson. 982 00:44:34,496 --> 00:44:36,529 Who have you ever nodded to, sir? 983 00:44:36,531 --> 00:44:39,032 To whom have you nodded? 984 00:44:39,034 --> 00:44:41,199 I rest my case, you alcoholic. 985 00:44:41,201 --> 00:44:42,268 That's supposed to be anonymous. 986 00:44:42,270 --> 00:44:44,404 Everyone can see your ankle monitor. 987 00:44:44,406 --> 00:44:46,505 Hope you guys hired an understudy for this hack. 988 00:44:46,507 --> 00:44:48,775 - You take that back. - Okay, settle down... 989 00:44:48,777 --> 00:44:49,909 We only have a few hours 990 00:44:49,911 --> 00:44:51,177 until my boyfriend and his dad get... 991 00:44:51,179 --> 00:44:54,179 I refuse to go on until this lumping lummox 992 00:44:54,181 --> 00:44:57,083 apologizes to me for mocking my resume. 993 00:44:57,085 --> 00:44:58,351 Listen to me! 994 00:44:58,353 --> 00:45:00,085 For the first time in my life 995 00:45:00,087 --> 00:45:01,753 I might be able to have the Christmas I want. 996 00:45:01,755 --> 00:45:05,058 A Christmas where I can relax and be normal. 997 00:45:05,060 --> 00:45:07,462 Normal! I need to be normal! 998 00:45:15,136 --> 00:45:17,072 I need to go help my mother now. 999 00:45:22,143 --> 00:45:23,545 Hope she doesn't talk to her mom that way. 1000 00:45:30,118 --> 00:45:32,451 Look at the way you manipulate those cheeseballs. 1001 00:45:32,453 --> 00:45:33,853 How many other girls can do that? 1002 00:45:33,855 --> 00:45:35,621 Mighty few I'd say. 1003 00:45:35,623 --> 00:45:37,623 I'm the envy of all my friends. 1004 00:45:37,625 --> 00:45:40,092 Oh, you sarcastic young woman. 1005 00:45:40,094 --> 00:45:41,460 There's gonna be a lot of hungry visitors 1006 00:45:41,462 --> 00:45:43,596 to the Christmas cave expecting their Christmas treats 1007 00:45:43,598 --> 00:45:46,567 in a few hours, and those balls will not disappoint. 1008 00:45:47,802 --> 00:45:49,634 You don't hear it, do you, Mom? 1009 00:45:49,636 --> 00:45:51,572 There's no food like Christmas food. 1010 00:45:52,840 --> 00:45:54,306 Christmas food. 1011 00:45:54,308 --> 00:45:55,509 Christmas food. 1012 00:45:56,578 --> 00:45:58,280 What the Blitzen are you going on about? 1013 00:46:00,281 --> 00:46:02,514 Mom, I gotta go check on Stephanie, 1014 00:46:02,516 --> 00:46:05,217 because she's Jewish and it's Christmas, 1015 00:46:05,219 --> 00:46:06,585 so, you know, 1016 00:46:06,587 --> 00:46:08,621 it's a difficult time for her people. 1017 00:46:08,623 --> 00:46:10,288 Why do you have to go this minute? 1018 00:46:10,290 --> 00:46:12,159 Because reasons. Jewish reasons. 1019 00:46:13,527 --> 00:46:16,031 Gosh, it sounds like so much work to be Jewish. 1020 00:46:35,315 --> 00:46:37,282 Why are you coming in through the window? 1021 00:46:37,284 --> 00:46:39,418 Rudy almost saw me coming here, the little twerp. 1022 00:46:39,420 --> 00:46:41,186 But that's the least of our problems. 1023 00:46:41,188 --> 00:46:43,588 Chill, woman. Your Hollywood parents are doing great. 1024 00:46:43,590 --> 00:46:46,458 I am merely a vessel for the spirit of the theater. 1025 00:46:46,460 --> 00:46:49,262 If by spirit, you mean vodka. 1026 00:46:49,264 --> 00:46:50,462 We're screwed. 1027 00:46:50,464 --> 00:46:53,299 Why, Captain Bummer of the SS Bring Me Down? 1028 00:46:53,301 --> 00:46:54,866 Because it will be kind of obvious 1029 00:46:54,868 --> 00:46:56,636 if Tanner and his dad show up for dinner 1030 00:46:56,638 --> 00:46:58,373 and there's no dinner. 1031 00:46:59,574 --> 00:47:02,708 Uh, yeah. We forgot about that. 1032 00:47:02,710 --> 00:47:05,344 Just so you know, I don't cook. 1033 00:47:05,346 --> 00:47:07,612 But my character 1034 00:47:07,614 --> 00:47:09,315 doesn't either. 1035 00:47:09,317 --> 00:47:10,583 - Okay. - Okay. 1036 00:47:10,585 --> 00:47:11,784 Can you save my life? 1037 00:47:11,786 --> 00:47:14,186 And go buy dinner for six people? Done. 1038 00:47:14,188 --> 00:47:15,887 And remember, nothing too Christmassy. 1039 00:47:15,889 --> 00:47:18,558 Double done. No red or green foods. 1040 00:47:18,560 --> 00:47:20,429 Ugh. Wish I was adopted. 1041 00:47:22,429 --> 00:47:23,730 Well, what are we supposed to do now? 1042 00:47:23,732 --> 00:47:25,630 Consider this intermission. 1043 00:47:25,632 --> 00:47:27,333 Anybody have a screwdriver? 1044 00:47:27,335 --> 00:47:28,934 What would happen if I poured alcohol 1045 00:47:28,936 --> 00:47:31,204 on that thing? 1046 00:47:31,206 --> 00:47:32,538 I would go to jail. 1047 00:47:32,540 --> 00:47:35,541 And worse, you'd be wasting peppermint schnapps 1048 00:47:44,585 --> 00:47:45,619 Oh, this? 1049 00:47:46,587 --> 00:47:48,622 Why, thank you. 1050 00:47:51,491 --> 00:47:53,458 You think the color brings out my eyes? 1051 00:47:53,460 --> 00:47:56,197 Oh, Tanner, stop. 1052 00:47:57,931 --> 00:47:59,167 Hmm. 1053 00:48:01,502 --> 00:48:04,270 Those cranberries cool yet, hon? We should put them in the... 1054 00:48:04,272 --> 00:48:06,538 Oh! 1055 00:48:06,540 --> 00:48:09,241 - Oh, no. Honey. - Oh, my god. 1056 00:48:09,243 --> 00:48:10,643 Your pretty dress. 1057 00:48:10,645 --> 00:48:13,712 Oh, oh. I'm so sorry. 1058 00:48:13,714 --> 00:48:15,614 Oh, no. 1059 00:48:15,616 --> 00:48:18,016 Ugh, the one year I don't have backup cranberries. 1060 00:48:18,018 --> 00:48:19,518 Seriously? 1061 00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:20,753 I'm sorry, go change. 1062 00:48:20,755 --> 00:48:21,853 You know what, you're gonna have to go change. 1063 00:48:21,855 --> 00:48:23,655 You gotta work that hologram Santa. 1064 00:48:23,657 --> 00:48:25,527 I'm so sorry, honey. 1065 00:48:26,728 --> 00:48:28,363 Go get yourself cleaned up. 1066 00:48:29,563 --> 00:48:32,297 No backup cranberries. 1067 00:48:32,299 --> 00:48:33,799 Oh! 1068 00:48:33,801 --> 00:48:35,636 I can't believe this. 1069 00:48:37,505 --> 00:48:39,704 Why the drama? You look great. 1070 00:48:39,706 --> 00:48:41,741 That was the dress, Steph. 1071 00:48:41,743 --> 00:48:43,643 Hey, no, no, no. 1072 00:48:43,645 --> 00:48:45,110 You look amazing. 1073 00:48:45,112 --> 00:48:48,413 And Tanner's gonna love you even more than he already does. 1074 00:48:48,415 --> 00:48:50,715 Because I cannot live in a world where Nicky Winters is not 1075 00:48:50,717 --> 00:48:53,286 with the man of her dreams. 1076 00:48:53,288 --> 00:48:54,688 That's kind of codependent. 1077 00:48:56,424 --> 00:48:58,690 I love it. 1078 00:48:58,692 --> 00:48:59,659 You look great. 1079 00:48:59,661 --> 00:49:00,992 - This is gonna be great. - Yeah? 1080 00:49:00,994 --> 00:49:02,661 And we got this, you know we do. 1081 00:49:02,663 --> 00:49:05,431 - Okay? - Okay. 1082 00:49:05,433 --> 00:49:07,301 - Hm. - You look good in yellow. 1083 00:49:16,777 --> 00:49:19,311 Hi, are you ready to go inside the cave? 1084 00:49:19,313 --> 00:49:21,012 - Yeah. - You're excited? Yeah. 1085 00:49:21,014 --> 00:49:22,581 - Yeah. - Exactly. Excited. 1086 00:49:22,583 --> 00:49:24,583 George Bailey to Clarence? 1087 00:49:24,585 --> 00:49:26,585 George Bailey to Clarence? 1088 00:49:26,587 --> 00:49:27,853 Come in, Clarence. 1089 00:49:27,855 --> 00:49:29,355 This is Clarence. 1090 00:49:29,357 --> 00:49:30,489 Roger that. 1091 00:49:30,491 --> 00:49:31,956 How's the crowd? 1092 00:49:31,958 --> 00:49:35,328 Do we need additional security or are they well behaved? 1093 00:49:35,330 --> 00:49:36,728 I've got them under control. 1094 00:49:36,730 --> 00:49:37,829 But if there's any trouble, 1095 00:49:37,831 --> 00:49:39,465 I'll let the hot cider do the talking. 1096 00:49:39,467 --> 00:49:42,804 Roger that, Clarence. Ho, ho, ho, hooraybell. 1097 00:49:48,476 --> 00:49:49,641 That's pretty good. 1098 00:49:49,643 --> 00:49:51,744 Well, that's your everyday Santa dance. 1099 00:49:51,746 --> 00:49:54,579 I kinda jailbroke this machine and I put it on a loop, 1100 00:49:54,581 --> 00:49:56,648 so it should keep on running for the rest of the night. 1101 00:49:56,650 --> 00:49:58,219 All right. 1102 00:50:03,790 --> 00:50:05,123 You know, my psychic just told me 1103 00:50:05,125 --> 00:50:07,125 that my spirit animal is a wolf. 1104 00:50:07,127 --> 00:50:08,395 You like wolves? 1105 00:50:12,567 --> 00:50:13,632 Sure. 1106 00:50:13,634 --> 00:50:15,467 Steph said something about a tip? 1107 00:50:15,469 --> 00:50:16,768 Oh, right. 1108 00:50:16,770 --> 00:50:20,405 Um, here is 15 dollars. 1109 00:50:20,407 --> 00:50:21,710 You're sure this'll work? 1110 00:50:22,576 --> 00:50:23,744 I'm 15 dollars sure. 1111 00:50:24,545 --> 00:50:26,378 Huh. Okay. 1112 00:50:43,831 --> 00:50:44,866 Whoops. 1113 00:50:47,802 --> 00:50:48,634 Rudy finally took a bathroom break, 1114 00:50:48,636 --> 00:50:50,536 so I could get over here. 1115 00:50:50,538 --> 00:50:52,505 Okay, so... 1116 00:50:52,507 --> 00:50:53,973 The Christmas trees are good to go, 1117 00:50:53,975 --> 00:50:56,675 and the dancing Santa loop should hold them 'till Easter. 1118 00:51:00,447 --> 00:51:02,415 Oh, shoot I forgot about the cat. 1119 00:51:02,417 --> 00:51:03,750 Calm down. 1120 00:51:03,752 --> 00:51:04,851 Hello, Parsley. 1121 00:51:04,853 --> 00:51:07,753 We're gonna put you in here, okay? 1122 00:51:07,755 --> 00:51:09,822 Okay, let's go. 1123 00:51:09,824 --> 00:51:14,159 You are the weirdest cat in the whole wide world. 1124 00:51:14,161 --> 00:51:15,527 Here's your little bed. 1125 00:51:15,529 --> 00:51:18,831 And your food, and your toys, and your litter box. 1126 00:51:18,833 --> 00:51:20,866 Remember how to use that, okay? 1127 00:51:23,703 --> 00:51:26,572 Okay. 1128 00:51:26,574 --> 00:51:28,541 You're not gonna believe this, but Tanner texted me, 1129 00:51:28,543 --> 00:51:30,875 his flight landed early. So, he's on his way here, now. 1130 00:51:30,877 --> 00:51:32,445 As in, not later, now. 1131 00:51:32,447 --> 00:51:34,646 Uh. Well, dinner is served. 1132 00:51:34,648 --> 00:51:36,614 Or, as my people would say, 1133 00:51:36,616 --> 00:51:38,519 bon appétit. 1134 00:51:43,757 --> 00:51:44,759 What is this? 1135 00:51:45,493 --> 00:51:46,692 They're latkes. 1136 00:51:46,694 --> 00:51:49,494 No, what is... What is all this? 1137 00:51:49,496 --> 00:51:51,864 Uh, where did you expect me to find a full meal 1138 00:51:51,866 --> 00:51:54,166 on Christmas Eve? It was either Jewish Deli 1139 00:51:54,168 --> 00:51:56,201 or China, China, China on 14th Street. 1140 00:51:56,203 --> 00:51:58,503 And honey, that food is bad, bad, bad. 1141 00:51:59,906 --> 00:52:01,942 Oh, crap, crap, crap. He's here! 1142 00:52:06,746 --> 00:52:08,246 Get up. Get up, they're here! 1143 00:52:08,248 --> 00:52:09,348 Already? 1144 00:52:09,350 --> 00:52:10,416 I didn't get to take my power nap. 1145 00:52:10,418 --> 00:52:11,750 All right, listen up, cast. 1146 00:52:11,752 --> 00:52:14,253 You know what they say, bad dress rehearsal, great show. 1147 00:52:14,255 --> 00:52:15,887 And I know that in my heart, you guys can... 1148 00:52:15,889 --> 00:52:17,655 Stop! Steph. 1149 00:52:17,657 --> 00:52:19,257 - Enough with the pep talk. - Sorry. 1150 00:52:20,728 --> 00:52:21,730 This is it. 1151 00:52:22,529 --> 00:52:24,730 Okay. 1152 00:52:24,732 --> 00:52:26,601 Are you sure we can actually pull this off? 1153 00:52:27,668 --> 00:52:29,735 It's not too late to back out? 1154 00:52:29,737 --> 00:52:30,969 You can tell them the truth, 1155 00:52:30,971 --> 00:52:32,570 and take the chances with your real family. 1156 00:52:32,572 --> 00:52:34,907 Because once you open that door, 1157 00:52:34,909 --> 00:52:37,509 there's no turning back, okay? 1158 00:52:37,511 --> 00:52:39,677 You will fall down the rabbit hole of deception 1159 00:52:39,679 --> 00:52:41,850 and trickery, like nothing you've ever known. 1160 00:52:43,683 --> 00:52:44,484 Sounds good. 1161 00:52:46,888 --> 00:52:48,786 - Nicky! - Tanner! 1162 00:52:48,788 --> 00:52:50,524 - I missed you. - I missed you too! 1163 00:52:52,259 --> 00:52:54,626 Who's this boy manhandling my daughter? 1164 00:52:54,628 --> 00:52:56,529 Oh. 1165 00:52:56,531 --> 00:52:58,596 Hah! I'm just kidding. I'm the dad of this family. 1166 00:52:58,598 --> 00:52:59,931 I'm Tanner. 1167 00:52:59,933 --> 00:53:02,000 - This is my, uh, dad, Lance. - Hi. Hey. 1168 00:53:02,002 --> 00:53:03,802 - Uh, hello. - Uh, nice to me you, Mr.... 1169 00:53:03,804 --> 00:53:04,869 Uh, call me Lance. 1170 00:53:04,871 --> 00:53:06,808 This is my friend Stephanie. 1171 00:53:07,842 --> 00:53:09,041 Very nice to meet you. 1172 00:53:09,043 --> 00:53:11,744 Uh, what's going on next door? 1173 00:53:14,681 --> 00:53:16,949 Oh! it's, um... 1174 00:53:16,951 --> 00:53:17,985 Uh, Dad? 1175 00:53:20,253 --> 00:53:21,686 Dad? 1176 00:53:21,688 --> 00:53:23,255 - That's me! - Hm. 1177 00:53:23,257 --> 00:53:25,623 Well, hello gentlemen! 1178 00:53:25,625 --> 00:53:26,724 So good to see you! 1179 00:53:26,726 --> 00:53:28,893 Let's not keep our guests waiting. 1180 00:53:28,895 --> 00:53:30,295 Come on in, boys! 1181 00:53:30,297 --> 00:53:31,329 Okay. 1182 00:53:31,331 --> 00:53:33,565 That's how a professional does it. 1183 00:53:33,567 --> 00:53:34,701 Guys, welcome! 1184 00:53:54,654 --> 00:53:55,554 Great bread! 1185 00:53:55,556 --> 00:53:57,559 Mm-hmm. 1186 00:53:58,726 --> 00:54:00,960 Yes. So... 1187 00:54:02,096 --> 00:54:03,665 ...dry. 1188 00:54:04,998 --> 00:54:06,364 Oh, um. 1189 00:54:06,366 --> 00:54:07,733 I'll go get you some water. 1190 00:54:07,735 --> 00:54:08,570 Okay. 1191 00:54:10,337 --> 00:54:12,036 Are you Jewish? 1192 00:54:12,038 --> 00:54:14,038 No. 1193 00:54:14,040 --> 00:54:15,340 We just love matzo. 1194 00:54:15,342 --> 00:54:17,610 So dry. Goes down scratchy. 1195 00:54:17,612 --> 00:54:19,581 It's, it's kind of a Cali thing. 1196 00:54:28,889 --> 00:54:30,788 So, Tanner! 1197 00:54:30,790 --> 00:54:32,757 How do you like Santa Clarita? 1198 00:54:32,759 --> 00:54:33,925 It's a little warmer than Boston, huh? 1199 00:54:35,763 --> 00:54:36,996 Connecticut. 1200 00:54:36,998 --> 00:54:38,697 - What? - Drunk, say "what?" 1201 00:54:38,699 --> 00:54:40,099 What? 1202 00:54:41,469 --> 00:54:43,902 Remember, Dad? I... 1203 00:54:43,904 --> 00:54:45,904 I swear his memory is going. 1204 00:54:45,906 --> 00:54:48,009 Tanner and his dad live in Connecticut. 1205 00:54:49,677 --> 00:54:51,409 This is George Bailey, to Clarence. 1206 00:54:51,411 --> 00:54:52,344 George Bailey to Clarence. 1207 00:54:52,346 --> 00:54:53,411 Have you seen Nicky? 1208 00:54:53,413 --> 00:54:54,813 I'm about to open the cave, 1209 00:54:54,815 --> 00:54:57,282 and I can't do it without her. Over. 1210 00:54:57,284 --> 00:54:58,817 That's a negative, George. 1211 00:54:58,819 --> 00:55:02,121 She disappoints yet again. Over. 1212 00:55:02,123 --> 00:55:03,721 You know, how come you never pronounce 1213 00:55:03,723 --> 00:55:05,090 the second C in Connecticut? 1214 00:55:05,092 --> 00:55:06,391 "Connect-ticut." 1215 00:55:06,393 --> 00:55:07,794 That would sound weird, right? 1216 00:55:09,063 --> 00:55:10,663 Makes you think, though, doesn't it? 1217 00:55:10,665 --> 00:55:12,697 Oh, no. It does not. 1218 00:55:14,868 --> 00:55:16,201 It's great here, Mr. Winters. 1219 00:55:16,203 --> 00:55:17,936 It's nice to be in the sun during Christmas time. 1220 00:55:17,938 --> 00:55:18,969 Christmas time! 1221 00:55:18,971 --> 00:55:21,739 Christmas time is here. 1222 00:55:21,741 --> 00:55:23,074 Right here! 1223 00:55:23,076 --> 00:55:24,742 And also next door. 1224 00:55:24,744 --> 00:55:27,378 Next door is having a special time. 1225 00:55:27,380 --> 00:55:29,848 Right, in the nick of time, 1226 00:55:29,850 --> 00:55:31,585 you might say. 1227 00:55:32,118 --> 00:55:33,153 Oh. 1228 00:55:33,821 --> 00:55:35,154 Oh! 1229 00:55:35,156 --> 00:55:38,157 I'm sorry, I have to go work on the main course. 1230 00:55:38,159 --> 00:55:39,824 That matzoh can't ball itself. 1231 00:55:39,826 --> 00:55:41,393 Oh, right? 1232 00:55:41,395 --> 00:55:42,728 Excuse me... 1233 00:55:43,697 --> 00:55:45,963 - I'll be right back. - Yeah. 1234 00:55:48,134 --> 00:55:49,703 We're having this stuff for dinner, too? 1235 00:55:52,005 --> 00:55:54,005 Hm. 1236 00:55:54,007 --> 00:55:55,074 "Connect-ticut." 1237 00:55:55,076 --> 00:55:56,007 - Yeah. - Oh! 1238 00:55:56,009 --> 00:55:57,476 Again! 1239 00:55:57,478 --> 00:55:58,811 Yeah. 1240 00:55:58,813 --> 00:56:00,846 I should take all those genealogy tests. 1241 00:56:00,848 --> 00:56:02,683 Oh, god. 1242 00:56:03,484 --> 00:56:04,717 - Hey. - Oh! 1243 00:56:05,920 --> 00:56:07,219 What the hell are you doing here, Doug? 1244 00:56:07,221 --> 00:56:08,987 Being an understudy. 1245 00:56:08,989 --> 00:56:11,023 I'm ready to go on, at a moment's notice, 1246 00:56:11,025 --> 00:56:12,925 and play your dad. 1247 00:56:12,927 --> 00:56:15,728 A great artist never gives up. 1248 00:56:15,730 --> 00:56:17,996 J.K. Rowling was rejected 12 times 1249 00:56:17,998 --> 00:56:20,132 before they published Harry Potter. 1250 00:56:20,134 --> 00:56:21,866 Right. 1251 00:56:21,868 --> 00:56:24,069 Um. 1252 00:56:24,071 --> 00:56:25,839 Expelliarmus, weirdo. 1253 00:56:27,808 --> 00:56:29,507 That's not a real spell. 1254 00:56:33,147 --> 00:56:35,750 Excuse me. 1255 00:56:37,016 --> 00:56:39,817 Hey, look at you. 1256 00:56:39,819 --> 00:56:40,985 I'm a candy cane! 1257 00:56:40,987 --> 00:56:42,887 Yeah, and a real sweet one, I'll bet. 1258 00:56:42,889 --> 00:56:45,056 That's cute. 1259 00:56:45,058 --> 00:56:47,259 Excuse me. Can I see your access pass? 1260 00:56:47,261 --> 00:56:50,094 Leave her alone, Rudy. 1261 00:56:50,096 --> 00:56:53,532 If you like unsecure areas, then that's on you. 1262 00:56:53,534 --> 00:56:55,933 Your father's just about to open the Christmas cave. 1263 00:56:55,935 --> 00:56:58,872 Okay, we are just about ready for a... 1264 00:57:00,907 --> 00:57:02,241 - What? - It's just... 1265 00:57:02,243 --> 00:57:04,208 You're not wearing your costume. 1266 00:57:04,210 --> 00:57:06,545 Dad, no. No costume, okay? 1267 00:57:06,547 --> 00:57:08,514 I'm... I'm the dancing hologram. 1268 00:57:08,516 --> 00:57:09,915 That's it. 1269 00:57:09,917 --> 00:57:12,152 Now, let's... 1270 00:57:12,987 --> 00:57:15,156 open the Christmas cave! 1271 00:57:17,023 --> 00:57:19,491 Okay... 1272 00:57:22,496 --> 00:57:24,929 She didn't put on her costume. 1273 00:57:24,931 --> 00:57:27,833 Why is this lady stopping Christmas? 1274 00:57:27,835 --> 00:57:29,067 Where's her Christmas spirit? 1275 00:57:29,069 --> 00:57:31,069 Why do you hate America? 1276 00:57:33,206 --> 00:57:36,743 Nicky, it's not really the same if you're not in a costume. 1277 00:57:40,014 --> 00:57:42,181 Doe she even care about this holiday? 1278 00:57:43,884 --> 00:57:44,916 Okay. 1279 00:57:44,918 --> 00:57:46,250 Come on, sweetie. 1280 00:57:46,252 --> 00:57:47,219 I'll you put it on. You can't put it on by yourself. 1281 00:57:47,221 --> 00:57:49,288 - Here we go. - Okay. 1282 00:57:49,290 --> 00:57:51,290 Slight delay, but not to panic! 1283 00:57:51,292 --> 00:57:54,125 The gate's opening is moments away! 1284 00:57:55,962 --> 00:57:57,798 It take... It takes a team. 1285 00:57:58,331 --> 00:58:00,232 It was mostly me. 1286 00:58:00,234 --> 00:58:01,567 And then the Sherpa said, 1287 00:58:01,569 --> 00:58:04,235 "I've never seen a white guy with calves like yours." 1288 00:58:07,907 --> 00:58:09,710 Hm. 1289 00:58:11,011 --> 00:58:13,978 So, is that your only move? Nodding, huh? 1290 00:58:13,980 --> 00:58:15,313 West Side Story was my big break 1291 00:58:15,315 --> 00:58:17,983 and you ruined it for me, you booze-back loser. 1292 00:58:17,985 --> 00:58:19,384 Oh, honey! 1293 00:58:19,386 --> 00:58:21,253 You don't have to whisper sweet nothings in my ear. 1294 00:58:21,255 --> 00:58:22,353 I know how much you love me! 1295 00:58:23,523 --> 00:58:26,027 I know it! I know how much you love me. 1296 00:58:27,194 --> 00:58:28,360 So much. 1297 00:58:35,302 --> 00:58:37,902 Oh! Beautiful. 1298 00:58:37,904 --> 00:58:41,174 You are the ornament that makes this Christmas complete. 1299 00:58:45,578 --> 00:58:48,148 Ow! Concrete. Hurting. 1300 00:58:49,917 --> 00:58:50,985 You're weird. 1301 00:58:53,052 --> 00:58:55,022 Oh, honey. Let me help you up. Come here. 1302 00:58:55,355 --> 00:58:56,554 Oh, baby. 1303 00:58:56,556 --> 00:58:59,023 It takes more than that to keep me down. 1304 00:58:59,025 --> 00:59:00,994 Okay guys, Dad's gonna open the cave. 1305 00:59:01,895 --> 00:59:03,895 The time has come! 1306 00:59:03,897 --> 00:59:06,431 I now pronounce the Christmas cave 1307 00:59:06,433 --> 00:59:09,034 officially open! 1308 00:59:28,922 --> 00:59:31,657 I know. Pretty awesome, right? 1309 00:59:31,659 --> 00:59:35,797 Now, you need get to your post at the end of the tour. 1310 00:59:38,197 --> 00:59:39,596 Well, come on! 1311 00:59:39,598 --> 00:59:41,699 All right, all right. One at a time, one at a time. 1312 00:59:41,701 --> 00:59:44,201 Merry Christmas, everybody. Merry Christmas! 1313 00:59:44,203 --> 00:59:45,302 Right after you. Make your way. 1314 00:59:45,304 --> 00:59:48,373 Take your time. Enjoy all the sights. 1315 00:59:48,375 --> 00:59:51,242 Good, good, good. No pushing, now. No pushing. 1316 00:59:51,244 --> 00:59:53,277 We've got plenty of room in the cave. 1317 00:59:53,279 --> 00:59:55,346 Come around a second lap, if you want. 1318 00:59:55,348 --> 00:59:58,317 It's Christmas time for crying out loud. 1319 00:59:58,319 --> 01:00:00,485 So, then I had to learn to... 1320 01:00:00,487 --> 01:00:01,786 to walk again. 1321 01:00:01,788 --> 01:00:03,253 And just as I was able to stand, 1322 01:00:03,255 --> 01:00:06,724 I fell in love with Chris here, and he swept me off my feet. 1323 01:00:07,927 --> 01:00:11,096 But then he had to go fight in the war. 1324 01:00:11,098 --> 01:00:12,297 That's so inspiring, Mr. Winters. 1325 01:00:12,299 --> 01:00:14,201 - Yeah. - Which war did you fight in? 1326 01:00:16,170 --> 01:00:19,040 Canada, in Canadian War. 1327 01:00:21,241 --> 01:00:23,507 Hmm. People don't really talk about it much. 1328 01:00:23,509 --> 01:00:25,011 - Eh? - No, they don't. 1329 01:00:27,014 --> 01:00:27,880 They don't. 1330 01:00:27,882 --> 01:00:29,350 They don't, they don't talk. 1331 01:00:36,255 --> 01:00:37,290 It's cool! 1332 01:00:43,998 --> 01:00:45,230 Okay... 1333 01:01:00,748 --> 01:01:02,081 So, it was the Battle of Winnipeg, right? 1334 01:01:02,083 --> 01:01:04,449 And it was brutal, because it was covered in snow 1335 01:01:04,451 --> 01:01:06,351 - and maple syrup... - Whoa. 1336 01:01:07,654 --> 01:01:09,121 Is Nicky all right in there? It's been a while. 1337 01:01:09,123 --> 01:01:10,422 Oh, no, no, no. 1338 01:01:10,424 --> 01:01:11,523 She was probably just... 1339 01:01:11,525 --> 01:01:12,724 - Oh. - ...wrangling 1340 01:01:12,726 --> 01:01:14,393 - an extra-large matzoh ball. - Okay. Heh, heh. 1341 01:01:14,395 --> 01:01:16,194 Too proud to ask for help. 1342 01:01:16,196 --> 01:01:18,262 You stay there, I'll go check. 1343 01:01:18,264 --> 01:01:20,400 And don't let them leave, okay? 1344 01:01:24,438 --> 01:01:26,304 ♪ Oh, Canada ♪ 1345 01:01:26,306 --> 01:01:27,308 No! 1346 01:01:29,543 --> 01:01:30,741 Yay! 1347 01:01:30,743 --> 01:01:32,076 Stephanie! 1348 01:01:32,078 --> 01:01:34,179 - There are no words. - The words are help! 1349 01:01:34,181 --> 01:01:35,579 Stephanie! 1350 01:01:35,581 --> 01:01:36,748 Someone's coming! With you in a second. 1351 01:01:37,817 --> 01:01:39,483 Stephanie? 1352 01:01:39,485 --> 01:01:40,819 Hey, do you have ice tongs? 1353 01:01:40,821 --> 01:01:42,487 I feel like my character would have ice tongs. 1354 01:01:42,489 --> 01:01:43,491 No! 1355 01:01:50,264 --> 01:01:51,966 It's fine. 1356 01:01:56,804 --> 01:01:59,603 Stephanie! Stephanie? Stephanie! 1357 01:01:59,605 --> 01:02:01,338 Come in this window. It's bigger. 1358 01:02:01,340 --> 01:02:03,076 - Yeah. - Come on. 1359 01:02:03,509 --> 01:02:05,076 Okay. 1360 01:02:09,616 --> 01:02:11,215 You guys okay in there? 1361 01:02:11,217 --> 01:02:12,416 Ow. 1362 01:02:12,418 --> 01:02:13,884 Nicky, someone's coming. 1363 01:02:13,886 --> 01:02:15,454 - Who? Hey, why... - Someone's coming. 1364 01:02:15,456 --> 01:02:16,554 Someone's coming! 1365 01:02:16,556 --> 01:02:18,623 Should I even ask? 1366 01:02:18,625 --> 01:02:21,226 How is everything going with Mr. and Mrs. Fake Parent? 1367 01:02:21,228 --> 01:02:22,694 Yeah, it's fine. Everything's fine. 1368 01:02:22,696 --> 01:02:24,161 - No, no, no, no! - It's just eggnog! 1369 01:02:24,163 --> 01:02:25,329 Okay. 1370 01:02:25,331 --> 01:02:27,232 It's just eggnog! 1371 01:02:27,234 --> 01:02:29,400 I can hear your ankle monitor beeping! 1372 01:02:29,402 --> 01:02:30,569 It could be better. 1373 01:02:30,571 --> 01:02:31,936 That's it. 1374 01:02:31,938 --> 01:02:33,304 - I can't act with this woman. - You can't act, period. 1375 01:02:33,306 --> 01:02:34,373 - Oh, I can't act? You're the... - Oh, oh, I'm this guy... 1376 01:02:34,375 --> 01:02:37,108 Guys. 1377 01:02:37,110 --> 01:02:38,112 Guys. 1378 01:02:40,346 --> 01:02:42,015 That boy in there loves me. 1379 01:02:43,150 --> 01:02:44,416 Please, do not ruin this. 1380 01:02:44,418 --> 01:02:46,520 He said I'm his Kate Middleton. 1381 01:02:47,888 --> 01:02:49,422 He said I'm his Kate! 1382 01:02:51,558 --> 01:02:52,560 Okay. 1383 01:02:53,360 --> 01:02:54,525 Fine. 1384 01:02:54,527 --> 01:02:56,527 Thank you. 1385 01:02:56,529 --> 01:02:58,362 - Who's Kate Middleton? - She's the princess! 1386 01:02:58,364 --> 01:02:59,366 Oh, my god. 1387 01:03:02,869 --> 01:03:04,636 Hm. 1388 01:03:07,306 --> 01:03:08,672 Who is ready for soup? 1389 01:03:08,674 --> 01:03:10,410 Ah, um. 1390 01:03:12,545 --> 01:03:13,411 Hm. 1391 01:03:13,413 --> 01:03:15,413 Watch and see how it's done. 1392 01:03:15,415 --> 01:03:17,148 I was just gonna ask Tanner to tell us the story 1393 01:03:17,150 --> 01:03:18,418 about how you guys met at camp. 1394 01:03:19,319 --> 01:03:20,521 You forgot to nod. 1395 01:03:23,190 --> 01:03:25,422 Once I heard Nicky on that tuba, 1396 01:03:25,424 --> 01:03:27,127 the rest is pretty much history. 1397 01:03:40,174 --> 01:03:42,373 Is that a bat? 1398 01:03:42,375 --> 01:03:44,308 Is it wearing reindeer antlers? 1399 01:03:44,310 --> 01:03:46,378 - Oh! - Hey! 1400 01:03:46,380 --> 01:03:48,179 Hey, guess what. 1401 01:03:48,181 --> 01:03:49,581 Let's play a fun party game called, 1402 01:03:49,583 --> 01:03:50,982 "No one look out the window." 1403 01:03:50,984 --> 01:03:53,418 Oh, I'm going outside to get a picture of that bat. 1404 01:03:53,420 --> 01:03:55,954 Oh, no. You don't wanna do that. 1405 01:03:55,956 --> 01:03:58,190 Why not? 1406 01:03:58,192 --> 01:04:00,592 Here's that thing, the family that lives next door is nuts. 1407 01:04:00,594 --> 01:04:01,960 - Bonkers. - Every year, 1408 01:04:01,962 --> 01:04:04,628 that sad family puts on some insane Christmas display 1409 01:04:04,630 --> 01:04:05,963 that is totally over the top. 1410 01:04:05,965 --> 01:04:08,333 Oh, criminally. Like, over the top. 1411 01:04:08,335 --> 01:04:10,534 And the kicker is, the city actually passed a law 1412 01:04:10,536 --> 01:04:12,603 to try and stop them from making more disturbing 1413 01:04:12,605 --> 01:04:14,072 and dangerous lighting displays. 1414 01:04:14,074 --> 01:04:16,340 - Oh, my god, they did! Yeah! - So, they built a huge cave, 1415 01:04:16,342 --> 01:04:18,375 and they put the display inside of that. 1416 01:04:18,377 --> 01:04:20,344 - Inside the cave! - And what's a Christmas cave 1417 01:04:20,346 --> 01:04:21,746 without Christmas bats? Am I right? 1418 01:04:21,748 --> 01:04:23,415 That's what you saw. 1419 01:04:23,417 --> 01:04:25,319 Mm-hmm. That's what you saw. 1420 01:04:26,587 --> 01:04:28,219 - Wow. - Mm-hmm. 1421 01:04:28,221 --> 01:04:29,622 Isn't that so, "Huh?" It's crazy. 1422 01:04:30,590 --> 01:04:32,523 That seems rather extreme. 1423 01:04:32,525 --> 01:04:35,594 Extreme doesn't begin to describe it. 1424 01:04:35,596 --> 01:04:38,563 They also make their children dress up as ornaments. 1425 01:04:38,565 --> 01:04:39,663 Ornaments! 1426 01:04:39,665 --> 01:04:41,733 And that's just child abuse. 1427 01:04:41,735 --> 01:04:43,367 Mm-hmm. 1428 01:04:43,369 --> 01:04:44,603 Uh, if these people are so horrible. 1429 01:04:44,605 --> 01:04:47,005 - No joke, trust me, they are. - Huh, yeah. 1430 01:04:47,007 --> 01:04:48,375 Why don't you guys just move? 1431 01:04:49,375 --> 01:04:50,377 Oh. 1432 01:04:51,612 --> 01:04:52,811 Uh... 1433 01:04:52,813 --> 01:04:56,648 - We feel sorry for them. - We feel sorry for them. 1434 01:04:56,650 --> 01:04:58,315 - Sorry for them. - Right, Mom and Dad? 1435 01:04:58,317 --> 01:04:59,352 Mm-hmm. 1436 01:05:00,353 --> 01:05:01,753 We pray for them nightly. 1437 01:05:01,755 --> 01:05:03,587 And drink to their salvation. 1438 01:05:03,589 --> 01:05:04,655 Amen. 1439 01:05:09,029 --> 01:05:10,462 Um... 1440 01:05:10,464 --> 01:05:12,029 Please excuse me for a moment. 1441 01:05:18,471 --> 01:05:20,005 Is, is your dad okay? 1442 01:05:20,007 --> 01:05:21,239 Uh, he'll be fine. 1443 01:05:21,241 --> 01:05:23,708 Just, uh, tough for him to talk about anything 1444 01:05:23,710 --> 01:05:26,344 Christmas related is all, you know? 1445 01:05:26,346 --> 01:05:27,411 - I understand. - Yeah, 1446 01:05:27,413 --> 01:05:29,047 it was a tough time for both of us. 1447 01:05:29,049 --> 01:05:31,284 I wish he could move on for his own sake. 1448 01:05:34,587 --> 01:05:36,820 All right, everyone. Calm down, calm down. 1449 01:05:36,822 --> 01:05:38,558 The gates are gonna be opening soon! 1450 01:05:40,761 --> 01:05:42,429 We've been waiting for hours. 1451 01:05:43,663 --> 01:05:46,030 Stephanie, will you help me in the kitchen 1452 01:05:46,032 --> 01:05:48,500 with something with which I need help with? 1453 01:05:48,502 --> 01:05:50,302 Oh, certainly, Nicky. 1454 01:05:54,574 --> 01:05:57,074 Let me tell you about the time I carried a Sherpa on my back 1455 01:05:57,076 --> 01:05:58,043 at 30,000 feet. 1456 01:05:58,045 --> 01:05:59,444 - Okay. - You're, you're nodding. 1457 01:05:59,446 --> 01:06:01,579 I... No, I am, I am. 'Cause I'm... I'm good at it. 1458 01:06:01,581 --> 01:06:03,551 I got... I got paid to do it. 1459 01:06:04,351 --> 01:06:07,518 Law & Order. 1460 01:06:07,520 --> 01:06:09,688 George Bailey to Clarence, what's the hold up? 1461 01:06:09,690 --> 01:06:11,822 Something must be wrong with the dancing Santa. 1462 01:06:11,824 --> 01:06:14,058 I told you Nicky can't be trusted. 1463 01:06:14,060 --> 01:06:15,259 - I gotta go back! - Okay. 1464 01:06:15,261 --> 01:06:16,360 - Come on! - Come on, come on. 1465 01:06:16,362 --> 01:06:17,094 It really does take two people 1466 01:06:17,096 --> 01:06:19,797 to put this costume on. 1467 01:06:19,799 --> 01:06:21,065 You'd think whoever designed this thing would have realized 1468 01:06:21,067 --> 01:06:22,800 anybody who bought it would have no friends. 1469 01:06:22,802 --> 01:06:25,704 - Yeah. Pull down. - Come on. Okay. 1470 01:06:25,706 --> 01:06:27,338 - One, two, three. - Okay. 1471 01:06:29,743 --> 01:06:31,342 - Good to go. Got it. - Good? 1472 01:06:31,344 --> 01:06:32,612 Go, team. 1473 01:06:37,583 --> 01:06:38,752 Sorry, folks. 1474 01:06:46,460 --> 01:06:48,360 Oh, my... No. 1475 01:06:48,362 --> 01:06:51,128 Not Satan. Santa! 1476 01:06:51,130 --> 01:06:52,230 That one scared me, and you? 1477 01:06:52,232 --> 01:06:54,766 Excuse us. 1478 01:06:54,768 --> 01:06:56,436 Sorry. One sec. 1479 01:06:57,436 --> 01:06:58,503 Nicky! 1480 01:06:58,505 --> 01:06:59,737 What is going on? 1481 01:06:59,739 --> 01:07:01,505 We're backed up all the way to the elves! 1482 01:07:01,507 --> 01:07:03,875 Just, uh, working out a leg cramp. 1483 01:07:03,877 --> 01:07:05,076 Oh. 1484 01:07:05,078 --> 01:07:06,478 Okay. 1485 01:07:06,480 --> 01:07:07,679 Hey, everyone. 1486 01:07:07,681 --> 01:07:09,581 Sorry about the delay. 1487 01:07:09,583 --> 01:07:11,882 But, I now present, 1488 01:07:11,884 --> 01:07:14,619 the dancing Santa! 1489 01:07:17,824 --> 01:07:20,125 This is the best Christmas ever, Dad! 1490 01:07:20,127 --> 01:07:21,494 Oh, honey. 1491 01:07:28,701 --> 01:07:31,603 Ha! Oh, my god. 1492 01:07:40,514 --> 01:07:43,947 And we have now come to the main event! 1493 01:07:43,949 --> 01:07:45,483 Ah, yeah! 1494 01:07:45,485 --> 01:07:46,918 I know what you're thinking. 1495 01:07:46,920 --> 01:07:50,422 It can't be. But it is. 1496 01:07:50,424 --> 01:07:53,491 I give you, the Santa hat 1497 01:07:53,493 --> 01:07:56,927 from the single greatest Christmas movie ever made! 1498 01:07:56,929 --> 01:07:58,762 Die Hard? 1499 01:07:58,764 --> 01:08:00,764 - No. - Elf? 1500 01:08:00,766 --> 01:08:02,766 - No. - Christmas with the Cranks? 1501 01:08:02,768 --> 01:08:03,701 What? No. 1502 01:08:03,703 --> 01:08:06,137 - Polar Express. - Uh, no. 1503 01:08:06,139 --> 01:08:07,438 A Christmas Story. 1504 01:08:07,440 --> 01:08:08,540 Ooh! Wrong! 1505 01:08:08,542 --> 01:08:09,875 - Bad Santa. - What? No! 1506 01:08:09,877 --> 01:08:11,909 - Scrooge? - Oh, it's not even close. 1507 01:08:11,911 --> 01:08:13,445 Christmas Vacation? 1508 01:08:13,447 --> 01:08:14,545 No. 1509 01:08:14,547 --> 01:08:16,480 - Gremlins! - Seriously? No! 1510 01:08:16,482 --> 01:08:17,815 Ernest Saves Christmas. 1511 01:08:17,817 --> 01:08:19,117 No! 1512 01:08:19,119 --> 01:08:21,752 I'm almost ready to ask you to leave the tour. 1513 01:08:21,754 --> 01:08:23,720 Santa Claus Versus The Martians. 1514 01:08:23,722 --> 01:08:24,988 Nobody saw that! 1515 01:08:24,990 --> 01:08:26,858 Nobody saw that! 1516 01:08:26,860 --> 01:08:28,493 I saw it. 1517 01:08:28,495 --> 01:08:31,528 Miracle on 34th Street! 1518 01:08:31,530 --> 01:08:32,596 - Aha? - Great movie! 1519 01:08:32,598 --> 01:08:33,801 First released in... 1520 01:08:34,935 --> 01:08:36,568 Oh, seriously? 1521 01:08:36,570 --> 01:08:40,537 Ugh. Oh. Ah! Dang kids! 1522 01:08:40,539 --> 01:08:43,774 Who'd put chewing gum on my Christmas hat display. 1523 01:08:43,776 --> 01:08:45,943 Dad, I need to go rest. 1524 01:08:45,945 --> 01:08:47,878 I'm cold and I'm tired. 1525 01:08:47,880 --> 01:08:49,646 Oh, you deserve a rest, honey. 1526 01:08:49,648 --> 01:08:53,751 You did a great job. Noelle loved it, didn't you? 1527 01:08:53,753 --> 01:08:55,755 I gotta go get this gum off my display. 1528 01:08:57,223 --> 01:08:58,422 Actually. 1529 01:08:58,424 --> 01:09:01,259 Why don't you wear the hat, in the meantime. 1530 01:09:01,261 --> 01:09:02,159 Hmm? 1531 01:09:02,161 --> 01:09:03,927 Hm. 1532 01:09:03,929 --> 01:09:05,766 Oh! 1533 01:09:06,932 --> 01:09:08,399 Will you look at that. 1534 01:09:08,401 --> 01:09:11,769 The two most precious things to me, in the entire world. 1535 01:09:11,771 --> 01:09:14,671 That Santa hat and my beautiful daughter. 1536 01:09:14,673 --> 01:09:16,707 - Daddy... - Not now, Noelle. 1537 01:09:16,709 --> 01:09:17,742 Okay, where was I? 1538 01:09:17,744 --> 01:09:19,610 Oh, yes. Two most precious things. 1539 01:09:19,612 --> 01:09:20,979 Hm. 1540 01:09:20,981 --> 01:09:23,515 Okay. Continuing on with our tour now, everybody. 1541 01:09:23,517 --> 01:09:24,750 We're coming up to our 1542 01:09:24,752 --> 01:09:27,784 build-your-own-snowman portion of the cave. 1543 01:09:27,786 --> 01:09:30,787 And here's something I made in my workshop. 1544 01:09:30,789 --> 01:09:32,924 It's a bat with antlers. 1545 01:09:32,926 --> 01:09:34,626 A reindeer bat. 1546 01:09:47,973 --> 01:09:49,607 Don't let me fall. 1547 01:09:49,609 --> 01:09:50,808 Don't let me fall. Don't let me... 1548 01:09:50,810 --> 01:09:52,543 I know! 1549 01:09:52,545 --> 01:09:53,610 You let me fall. 1550 01:09:53,612 --> 01:09:55,712 I hate Christmas 1551 01:09:55,714 --> 01:09:56,881 - so much. - Is this the hat... 1552 01:09:56,883 --> 01:09:58,114 That hat from the stupid, old movie 1553 01:09:58,116 --> 01:10:00,685 my dad spent my college education money on? 1554 01:10:00,687 --> 01:10:01,952 Yeah, it is. 1555 01:10:01,954 --> 01:10:03,153 Well, you got back just in time. 1556 01:10:03,155 --> 01:10:05,023 Because I think Tanner and his dad are starting 1557 01:10:05,025 --> 01:10:06,724 to get suspicious. 1558 01:10:06,726 --> 01:10:08,626 I know. 1559 01:10:08,628 --> 01:10:10,862 It's a miracle they haven't figured it out yet. 1560 01:10:10,864 --> 01:10:13,598 If I ever hire actors to play my parents, 1561 01:10:13,600 --> 01:10:14,765 it will not be those two. 1562 01:10:16,069 --> 01:10:18,769 But, if I had a boyfriend as awesome as yours, 1563 01:10:18,771 --> 01:10:20,270 I too would hire a fake family 1564 01:10:20,272 --> 01:10:21,672 to have Christmas dinner with them. 1565 01:10:22,875 --> 01:10:23,975 Sure, you can see the kitchen. 1566 01:10:23,977 --> 01:10:26,043 - Oh! - Go ahead, go, go, go. 1567 01:10:27,914 --> 01:10:29,450 Okay. 1568 01:10:31,718 --> 01:10:33,487 - Go, go. - Okay, okay, okay. 1569 01:10:40,727 --> 01:10:41,826 Everything all right in here? 1570 01:10:41,828 --> 01:10:43,961 - Yeah, I was starting to worry. - Yeah. 1571 01:10:43,963 --> 01:10:45,665 Yeah, everything's fine. We were just... 1572 01:10:46,865 --> 01:10:47,998 Just doing the dishes. 1573 01:10:48,000 --> 01:10:48,899 Doing the dishes. 1574 01:10:48,901 --> 01:10:50,635 Doing the dishes. 1575 01:10:50,637 --> 01:10:51,970 Okay, all done. 1576 01:10:51,972 --> 01:10:53,104 Come on, shall we? 1577 01:10:53,106 --> 01:10:55,607 Come on, let's go. 1578 01:10:55,609 --> 01:10:57,041 Latke. 1579 01:10:57,043 --> 01:10:58,943 That was close. 1580 01:10:58,945 --> 01:11:01,112 Clarence to George Bailey. 1581 01:11:01,114 --> 01:11:02,913 Clarence to George Bailey. 1582 01:11:02,915 --> 01:11:04,851 It's not such a wonderful life, after all. 1583 01:11:05,951 --> 01:11:07,118 Oh, boy. 1584 01:11:07,120 --> 01:11:08,885 And that's how you make a chicken napkin. 1585 01:11:08,887 --> 01:11:10,654 Chicken napkin! 1586 01:11:11,857 --> 01:11:14,058 Stupidest thing I've ever seen. 1587 01:11:14,060 --> 01:11:15,960 Oh! I just realized. I haven't done my impression 1588 01:11:15,962 --> 01:11:16,964 of Abraham Lincoln. 1589 01:11:17,998 --> 01:11:19,663 No one knows 1590 01:11:19,665 --> 01:11:20,832 what he sounds like, honey. 1591 01:11:20,834 --> 01:11:22,899 And is therefore, immune to criticism. 1592 01:11:25,871 --> 01:11:28,072 "Four score and seven years ago." 1593 01:11:28,074 --> 01:11:30,041 Um, sorry. Lincoln's from the south. 1594 01:11:30,043 --> 01:11:31,044 Immune to criticism! 1595 01:11:33,146 --> 01:11:36,180 Well, as they say in Cali, it's time for Latkes! 1596 01:11:37,383 --> 01:11:38,649 Nicky? 1597 01:11:39,686 --> 01:11:40,752 What's going on? 1598 01:11:40,754 --> 01:11:42,923 Mrs. Franklin? What are you doing back? 1599 01:11:43,990 --> 01:11:45,922 Bed bugs at the hotel. 1600 01:11:45,924 --> 01:11:49,060 Who are these people? Why are they in my house? 1601 01:11:49,062 --> 01:11:50,927 Your house? 1602 01:11:50,929 --> 01:11:52,130 She's in here. 1603 01:11:52,132 --> 01:11:54,666 See, Dad. This is ugly. 1604 01:11:54,668 --> 01:11:56,167 The only upside of this situation is that 1605 01:11:56,169 --> 01:11:58,168 I'm going to be getting the bigger room. 1606 01:11:58,170 --> 01:12:00,807 Since, Nicky's going away for a long, long time. 1607 01:12:03,810 --> 01:12:05,208 - Go home, Rudy. - But... 1608 01:12:05,210 --> 01:12:06,547 I wanna... 1609 01:12:11,851 --> 01:12:13,818 What's going on? 1610 01:12:13,820 --> 01:12:16,089 Yeah, Nicky. What exactly is going on? 1611 01:12:18,223 --> 01:12:20,123 You guys live here? 1612 01:12:20,125 --> 01:12:22,025 No! Just me. 1613 01:12:22,027 --> 01:12:24,394 Nicky's dad lives next door. 1614 01:12:24,396 --> 01:12:25,829 Nicky's dad? 1615 01:12:25,831 --> 01:12:26,900 Yes? 1616 01:12:29,803 --> 01:12:31,101 Then who are you? 1617 01:12:31,103 --> 01:12:33,837 I'm Chris, I'm Nicky's dad. 1618 01:12:33,839 --> 01:12:35,073 I'm Chris. 1619 01:12:35,075 --> 01:12:36,207 I'm Nicky's dad. 1620 01:12:36,209 --> 01:12:37,975 No! 1621 01:12:37,977 --> 01:12:39,746 I'm Nicky's dad! 1622 01:12:40,213 --> 01:12:41,845 Damn, understudy. 1623 01:12:41,847 --> 01:12:43,980 Understudy? No, no, no. Not again! 1624 01:12:43,982 --> 01:12:46,152 Aw, I thought you'd be used to it by now. 1625 01:12:47,853 --> 01:12:49,923 No, this can't be happening. I will not be replaced! 1626 01:12:51,191 --> 01:12:52,489 I've been listening through the vents. 1627 01:12:52,491 --> 01:12:55,993 And I believe your acting, is missing the mark. 1628 01:12:55,995 --> 01:12:58,762 Oh, yeah? 1629 01:12:58,764 --> 01:13:00,497 Missing the mark, huh! 1630 01:13:02,736 --> 01:13:04,167 Yeah. 1631 01:13:04,169 --> 01:13:05,869 Understudies! 1632 01:13:05,871 --> 01:13:07,137 Stop! Stop, right now! 1633 01:13:08,807 --> 01:13:09,873 Cut! 1634 01:13:10,910 --> 01:13:13,243 Please note. 1635 01:13:13,245 --> 01:13:15,715 That I did all my own stunts. 1636 01:13:21,920 --> 01:13:23,520 You're all done here. 1637 01:13:24,391 --> 01:13:26,056 And scene! 1638 01:13:26,058 --> 01:13:27,524 - Please. - I feel good. You know. 1639 01:13:27,526 --> 01:13:28,826 Normally, I am my harshest critic. 1640 01:13:28,828 --> 01:13:30,260 But I feel like tonight was some of my best work. 1641 01:13:30,262 --> 01:13:33,029 And now, if you'll allow me to give you a few pointers 1642 01:13:33,031 --> 01:13:34,064 on your "performance." 1643 01:13:34,066 --> 01:13:35,532 - Okay... - I would start with the... 1644 01:13:36,468 --> 01:13:38,269 - You're gonna be singing - No! 1645 01:13:38,271 --> 01:13:39,170 - in Rikers! - No! 1646 01:13:39,172 --> 01:13:40,237 - No! - Yes! 1647 01:13:40,239 --> 01:13:41,471 - No! - Yes! 1648 01:13:41,473 --> 01:13:43,940 Can we talk about this over a drink? 1649 01:13:43,942 --> 01:13:45,176 Where is my Parsley? 1650 01:13:45,178 --> 01:13:47,310 Oh, he's in here. 1651 01:13:48,882 --> 01:13:49,913 I... 1652 01:13:49,915 --> 01:13:50,950 Nicky, what's going on? 1653 01:13:51,918 --> 01:13:53,551 Please, I... 1654 01:13:55,120 --> 01:13:58,322 Tanner, I swear I can explain. 1655 01:13:58,324 --> 01:14:01,024 Yes. We'd all like to hear that. 1656 01:14:01,026 --> 01:14:02,061 Is it true? 1657 01:14:02,896 --> 01:14:04,128 Huh, what Rudy says? 1658 01:14:04,130 --> 01:14:08,064 That you're so ashamed of us, you hired actors 1659 01:14:08,066 --> 01:14:09,833 so that your boyfriend and his father 1660 01:14:09,835 --> 01:14:11,002 wouldn't have to meet your real family? 1661 01:14:11,004 --> 01:14:12,403 Christmas has caused Tanner and his Dad 1662 01:14:12,405 --> 01:14:14,939 nothing but heartache. And I couldn't let them suffer 1663 01:14:14,941 --> 01:14:16,239 through your insane version 1664 01:14:16,241 --> 01:14:17,809 - of this holiday! - Oh, Nicky. 1665 01:14:17,811 --> 01:14:19,210 You are in big trouble. 1666 01:14:19,212 --> 01:14:21,011 All this fighting. 1667 01:14:21,013 --> 01:14:22,145 I hate Christmas. 1668 01:14:22,147 --> 01:14:24,247 Oh. Hate? 1669 01:14:24,249 --> 01:14:27,818 Oh! Oh, is this the boy who turned you against me? 1670 01:14:27,820 --> 01:14:29,019 I didn't ask her to do anything. 1671 01:14:29,021 --> 01:14:31,956 Oh, right, she just magically transformed 1672 01:14:31,958 --> 01:14:34,859 into a liar who happens to hate Christmas, just like you. 1673 01:14:34,861 --> 01:14:36,193 That's enough! 1674 01:14:36,195 --> 01:14:37,894 We don't have to stand here and listen to this. 1675 01:14:37,896 --> 01:14:39,229 We're leaving. Vamos. 1676 01:14:39,231 --> 01:14:40,232 Dad. 1677 01:14:40,999 --> 01:14:42,002 Now. 1678 01:14:43,969 --> 01:14:45,036 Why does Christmas 1679 01:14:45,038 --> 01:14:47,107 always have to ruin everything good. 1680 01:14:58,618 --> 01:14:59,684 Tanner, Tanner! 1681 01:14:59,686 --> 01:15:01,618 No, no, no, sweetheart. Just let him go. 1682 01:15:01,620 --> 01:15:03,119 I really, really like him. 1683 01:15:03,121 --> 01:15:05,389 They're not even Christmas people! 1684 01:15:05,391 --> 01:15:06,858 You're right. 1685 01:15:06,860 --> 01:15:07,958 They're normal. 1686 01:15:07,960 --> 01:15:10,094 I've never had a normal Christmas! 1687 01:15:10,096 --> 01:15:11,628 Do you have any idea how good it felt 1688 01:15:11,630 --> 01:15:14,265 to sit down with my fake dad and my fake family 1689 01:15:14,267 --> 01:15:15,565 on Christmas Eve? 1690 01:15:15,567 --> 01:15:17,969 A feeling of peace came over me, 1691 01:15:17,971 --> 01:15:20,304 like, I have never known in my entire life. 1692 01:15:20,306 --> 01:15:23,875 Okay. You don't even know what you're saying right now. 1693 01:15:28,047 --> 01:15:30,282 That cat really should have been called Pissy. 1694 01:15:32,951 --> 01:15:34,652 It's my magic hat! 1695 01:15:35,888 --> 01:15:36,956 Ugh. 1696 01:15:44,129 --> 01:15:45,164 Ruined. 1697 01:16:04,182 --> 01:16:05,284 Tanner! 1698 01:16:07,320 --> 01:16:08,822 Tanner, wait. 1699 01:16:10,088 --> 01:16:11,354 Tanner, wait! 1700 01:16:11,356 --> 01:16:12,792 Wait, please. 1701 01:17:20,692 --> 01:17:23,096 Die, you stupid Christmas tree! 1702 01:17:30,035 --> 01:17:31,270 Nicky's gone crazy! 1703 01:17:32,504 --> 01:17:34,372 This is the best Christmas ever. 1704 01:17:34,374 --> 01:17:35,439 Mom, can I have her room 1705 01:17:35,441 --> 01:17:38,042 once you put her in the insane hospital? 1706 01:17:38,945 --> 01:17:40,110 Oh. 1707 01:17:40,112 --> 01:17:43,046 Mommy, why is Nicky killing Christmas? 1708 01:17:43,048 --> 01:17:46,117 Honey, it's just something teenage girls do. 1709 01:17:47,320 --> 01:17:50,153 Nicky, you stop this behavior, right now! 1710 01:17:50,155 --> 01:17:52,288 No, Dad. I need to do this. 1711 01:17:52,290 --> 01:17:54,391 'Cause Christmas ruins everything. 1712 01:17:54,393 --> 01:17:58,162 I hate this stupid decoration. 1713 01:17:58,164 --> 01:18:00,564 And stupid Santa Claus. 1714 01:18:00,566 --> 01:18:04,100 And all the stupid songs. 1715 01:18:04,102 --> 01:18:06,470 And the stupid trees every damned year! 1716 01:18:06,472 --> 01:18:08,305 Why do you do this to us, Dad? 1717 01:18:08,307 --> 01:18:11,375 Why do you shove Christmas down everyone's throats? 1718 01:18:11,377 --> 01:18:13,176 Why can't you be a normal dad? 1719 01:18:13,178 --> 01:18:14,377 If you were a normal dad, 1720 01:18:14,379 --> 01:18:15,813 I never would have had to lie to Tanner, 1721 01:18:15,815 --> 01:18:17,047 and gone through all this. 1722 01:18:17,049 --> 01:18:18,282 And Tanner never would have found out about it 1723 01:18:18,284 --> 01:18:20,317 and gotten mad at me. But, because of you, 1724 01:18:20,319 --> 01:18:23,119 Tanner will never talk me again. 1725 01:18:23,121 --> 01:18:25,055 Why are you such a Christmas freak? 1726 01:18:25,057 --> 01:18:26,457 Because that's what you are, Dad. 1727 01:18:26,459 --> 01:18:27,494 A freak. 1728 01:18:30,797 --> 01:18:33,596 Oh, my god. 1729 01:18:48,380 --> 01:18:50,282 Oh. Ah. 1730 01:19:03,463 --> 01:19:07,363 ♪ Something's wrong ♪ 1731 01:19:07,365 --> 01:19:11,534 ♪ Where is our love song ♪ 1732 01:19:11,536 --> 01:19:16,107 ♪ Show me where does it say ♪ 1733 01:19:16,109 --> 01:19:20,577 ♪ Your love just fades away ♪ 1734 01:19:20,579 --> 01:19:23,180 ♪ I've always been ♪ 1735 01:19:23,182 --> 01:19:25,248 ♪ Oh ♪ 1736 01:19:25,250 --> 01:19:28,284 ♪ The kind who holds it in ♪ 1737 01:19:28,286 --> 01:19:29,452 ♪ Oh ♪ 1738 01:19:29,454 --> 01:19:33,157 ♪ I used to pass love but ♪ 1739 01:19:33,159 --> 01:19:38,895 ♪ Now I know I dedicate ♪ 1740 01:19:38,897 --> 01:19:43,502 ♪ A walk away from me ♪ 1741 01:19:46,172 --> 01:19:52,379 ♪ There to guide Your walk away ♪ 1742 01:19:55,447 --> 01:19:59,350 ♪ Oh ♪ 1743 01:19:59,352 --> 01:20:03,456 ♪ Oh ♪ 1744 01:20:05,624 --> 01:20:09,159 ♪ Baby, baby ♪ 1745 01:20:09,161 --> 01:20:12,197 ♪ Baby don't ♪ 1746 01:20:14,432 --> 01:20:16,300 ♪ Dedicate ♪ 1747 01:20:16,302 --> 01:20:20,604 ♪ A walk away from me ♪ 1748 01:20:20,606 --> 01:20:23,306 ♪ To where I belong ♪ 1749 01:20:23,308 --> 01:20:27,443 ♪ There to guide Your walk away ♪ 1750 01:20:27,445 --> 01:20:30,049 ♪ To walk away ♪ 1751 01:20:33,386 --> 01:20:37,057 ♪ Please take off you're lying ♪ 1752 01:20:40,459 --> 01:20:42,525 ♪ To walk away ♪ 1753 01:20:44,230 --> 01:20:45,231 Honey? 1754 01:20:49,602 --> 01:20:51,471 Why don't you come downstairs and open presents? 1755 01:20:52,737 --> 01:20:54,037 Seriously? 1756 01:20:54,039 --> 01:20:56,207 Despite what's going on between you and your dad, 1757 01:20:56,209 --> 01:20:57,341 we're a family. 1758 01:20:57,343 --> 01:20:58,708 And it's Christmas Eve, 1759 01:20:58,710 --> 01:21:00,480 and that's when we open presents. 1760 01:21:01,246 --> 01:21:02,248 Okay? 1761 01:21:04,282 --> 01:21:05,351 All right. Come on. 1762 01:21:33,346 --> 01:21:35,248 Why is everyone so sad? 1763 01:21:38,383 --> 01:21:39,617 Oh, no. 1764 01:21:39,619 --> 01:21:41,784 Oh. Mom? Mom, what's wrong? 1765 01:21:41,786 --> 01:21:43,188 My chest. 1766 01:21:46,292 --> 01:21:48,492 - Fran Sienna Winters? - Yes, yes. 1767 01:21:48,494 --> 01:21:50,327 I have the good news to tell you, 1768 01:21:50,329 --> 01:21:51,662 she did not have a heart attack. 1769 01:21:51,664 --> 01:21:52,796 Oh! 1770 01:21:52,798 --> 01:21:54,297 What was it then? 1771 01:21:54,299 --> 01:21:55,765 Well, according to the test we made, 1772 01:21:55,767 --> 01:21:59,336 your mother is as healthy as a... 1773 01:21:59,338 --> 01:22:02,275 You know, you're not a horse, you're not a donkey, it's... 1774 01:22:03,342 --> 01:22:04,742 - You're a mule? - Yes. 1775 01:22:04,744 --> 01:22:06,277 Your mother is mule. 1776 01:22:06,279 --> 01:22:07,312 - Mm-hmm. - Oh. 1777 01:22:09,981 --> 01:22:11,649 So mom's gonna be okay? That's wonderful. 1778 01:22:11,651 --> 01:22:14,417 So, what exactly did happen to her? 1779 01:22:14,419 --> 01:22:16,586 We see this sometimes during the holidays, 1780 01:22:16,588 --> 01:22:18,055 cause is stress. 1781 01:22:18,057 --> 01:22:21,558 Is there something stressful happening in the family now? 1782 01:22:21,560 --> 01:22:23,562 Something that would upset her? 1783 01:22:26,031 --> 01:22:29,535 Any what, she said she wants to speak to someone named Nicky. 1784 01:22:45,750 --> 01:22:47,186 Grandma? 1785 01:22:49,054 --> 01:22:50,589 Are you alone? 1786 01:22:51,456 --> 01:22:53,056 - Yup. - Oh. 1787 01:22:53,058 --> 01:22:54,292 Good. 1788 01:22:54,294 --> 01:22:57,528 I didn't know how much longer I could fake it. 1789 01:22:57,530 --> 01:23:00,564 Grandma, you were pretending? 1790 01:23:00,566 --> 01:23:02,599 I can't breathe. 1791 01:23:02,601 --> 01:23:04,068 Oh, help me. 1792 01:23:04,070 --> 01:23:05,536 Help me. 1793 01:23:07,539 --> 01:23:09,340 I should've been an actress, huh? 1794 01:23:09,342 --> 01:23:10,407 Hmm. 1795 01:23:10,409 --> 01:23:12,743 Screw you, Faye Dunaway. 1796 01:23:12,745 --> 01:23:14,478 Who's Faye Dunaway? 1797 01:23:14,480 --> 01:23:16,346 Exactly. 1798 01:23:16,348 --> 01:23:18,549 Why would you pretend to have a heart attack? 1799 01:23:18,551 --> 01:23:21,452 The tension between you and your dad 1800 01:23:21,454 --> 01:23:24,555 was sticker than molasses on neck hair. 1801 01:23:24,557 --> 01:23:26,055 We were all worried about you. 1802 01:23:26,057 --> 01:23:28,227 Oh, let me have some fun. 1803 01:23:28,861 --> 01:23:30,627 Plus, 1804 01:23:30,629 --> 01:23:33,363 I wanted to give you some time 1805 01:23:33,365 --> 01:23:36,500 to make things right between you and your dad. 1806 01:23:36,502 --> 01:23:40,570 Fine, I'll just apologize to him. 1807 01:23:40,572 --> 01:23:41,807 Will you mean it? 1808 01:23:42,674 --> 01:23:43,676 No. 1809 01:23:50,415 --> 01:23:51,482 Ow! 1810 01:23:51,484 --> 01:23:53,716 - Ow! - You... 1811 01:23:53,718 --> 01:23:55,918 - idiot. - You're strong for an old woman. 1812 01:23:55,920 --> 01:23:59,422 He's gonna know if you fake it. 1813 01:23:59,424 --> 01:24:02,626 Clark Gable knew when I made love to him. 1814 01:24:02,628 --> 01:24:04,927 And let me tell you, he did give a damn. 1815 01:24:06,865 --> 01:24:08,599 Grandma, please. 1816 01:24:08,601 --> 01:24:09,768 Oh, sweetie. 1817 01:24:15,540 --> 01:24:19,643 If you don't make things right between you and your dad, 1818 01:24:19,645 --> 01:24:22,512 things will never be the same again. 1819 01:24:30,588 --> 01:24:32,488 She's okay? She's talking? 1820 01:24:32,490 --> 01:24:34,757 You know Grandma, she says what she says. 1821 01:24:36,128 --> 01:24:37,927 She's feeling good though. 1822 01:24:37,929 --> 01:24:39,162 You can all go in now. 1823 01:24:39,164 --> 01:24:41,899 Okay. Come on kids, let's go see Grandma. 1824 01:24:41,901 --> 01:24:43,367 Wait. Nicky, honey, 1825 01:24:43,369 --> 01:24:45,638 just, um, sit down for a second, I wanna show you something. 1826 01:24:46,638 --> 01:24:47,706 Okay. 1827 01:24:54,446 --> 01:24:55,878 Oh, my god. 1828 01:24:55,880 --> 01:24:58,448 Yeah, not a pretty picture, is it? 1829 01:24:58,450 --> 01:25:01,486 What happened to his face, the poor kid. 1830 01:25:02,554 --> 01:25:03,655 That's your father. 1831 01:25:06,491 --> 01:25:08,591 When he was five years old. 1832 01:25:08,593 --> 01:25:10,226 Some neighborhood bullies threw him in a patch 1833 01:25:10,228 --> 01:25:13,197 of poison ivy and rubbed his face in it. 1834 01:25:13,199 --> 01:25:14,933 As you can see it swelled up pretty bad. 1835 01:25:16,735 --> 01:25:17,870 That's awful. 1836 01:25:18,904 --> 01:25:20,503 It was a few weeks before Christmas 1837 01:25:20,505 --> 01:25:21,637 and even though he looked like that 1838 01:25:21,639 --> 01:25:24,006 he still really wanted to see Santa. 1839 01:25:24,008 --> 01:25:26,643 When your grandparents took him to the mall 1840 01:25:26,645 --> 01:25:28,845 all the kids in line were pointing at his face 1841 01:25:28,847 --> 01:25:30,747 and making fun of him, 1842 01:25:30,749 --> 01:25:31,851 and he started crying. 1843 01:25:32,852 --> 01:25:34,818 And then as they turned to go, 1844 01:25:34,820 --> 01:25:38,790 that mall Santa picked him up, sat him down on his lap, 1845 01:25:39,725 --> 01:25:40,793 and your dad... 1846 01:25:41,694 --> 01:25:42,859 stopped crying, 1847 01:25:42,861 --> 01:25:44,894 and told that wonderful Santa 1848 01:25:44,896 --> 01:25:46,832 everything he wanted for Christmas. 1849 01:25:48,200 --> 01:25:49,867 See, that Santa 1850 01:25:49,869 --> 01:25:51,534 took a kid who believed in Christmas 1851 01:25:51,536 --> 01:25:53,237 and made him feel like a little boy again, 1852 01:25:53,239 --> 01:25:54,574 instead of a freak. 1853 01:25:56,775 --> 01:25:57,777 Mom, I... 1854 01:25:59,645 --> 01:26:01,644 I had no idea. 1855 01:26:01,646 --> 01:26:03,980 He just wants you guys to feel 1856 01:26:03,982 --> 01:26:05,849 loved and magical, 1857 01:26:05,851 --> 01:26:07,887 like he did that day when he was five. 1858 01:26:10,255 --> 01:26:11,988 So now you know. 1859 01:26:41,053 --> 01:26:43,856 They just wanna observe her, she's gonna be fine. 1860 01:26:46,624 --> 01:26:49,693 ♪ Jingle bells poo-poo smells ♪ 1861 01:26:49,695 --> 01:26:52,328 Come on, Noelle, I don't wanna sing by myself. 1862 01:26:52,330 --> 01:26:55,565 - ♪ Jingle bells poo-poo smells ♪ - ♪ Jingle bells poo-poo smells 1863 01:26:55,567 --> 01:26:57,868 - ♪ 'Till you flush it down ♪ - ♪ 'Till you flush it down ♪ 1864 01:26:57,870 --> 01:27:00,770 - ♪ And when you go number two ♪ - ♪ And when you go number two ♪ 1865 01:27:00,772 --> 01:27:03,707 ♪ Better not fall in And drown ♪ 1866 01:27:03,709 --> 01:27:04,808 ♪ Hey ♪ 1867 01:27:08,713 --> 01:27:09,880 - Hello, boys and girls! - Ooh! 1868 01:27:09,882 --> 01:27:11,348 Oh, and Grandma. 1869 01:27:11,350 --> 01:27:13,716 I'm a Jelf, a Jewish elf. 1870 01:27:13,718 --> 01:27:16,052 And I brought Christmas with me. 1871 01:27:16,054 --> 01:27:17,820 Christmas! 1872 01:27:17,822 --> 01:27:19,456 ♪ Making spirits bright ♪ 1873 01:27:19,458 --> 01:27:21,891 ♪ What fun it is To ride and sing ♪ 1874 01:27:21,893 --> 01:27:23,327 ♪ A sleighing song tonight ♪ 1875 01:27:23,329 --> 01:27:24,694 - ♪ Oh, jingle bells ♪ - What? 1876 01:27:24,696 --> 01:27:25,998 - ♪ Jingle bells ♪ - Are you serious? 1877 01:27:27,066 --> 01:27:28,431 - ♪ Jingle all the way ♪ - This is... 1878 01:27:28,433 --> 01:27:30,234 - Oh, can I get in? - ♪ Oh, what fun ♪ 1879 01:27:30,236 --> 01:27:33,103 - ♪ It is to ride ♪ - ♪ It is to ride ♪ 1880 01:27:33,105 --> 01:27:33,871 - ♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪ - ♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪ 1881 01:27:33,873 --> 01:27:34,671 Wait, what's missing? 1882 01:27:34,673 --> 01:27:35,404 I know! 1883 01:27:35,406 --> 01:27:37,674 Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! 1884 01:27:37,676 --> 01:27:38,942 Santa! 1885 01:27:40,012 --> 01:27:41,744 And har-dee-dar-har. 1886 01:27:41,746 --> 01:27:45,616 What's this? I see kids with no presents. 1887 01:27:45,618 --> 01:27:47,783 Ho, ho, this cannot be. 1888 01:27:47,785 --> 01:27:48,851 Ho, ho, ho. 1889 01:27:48,853 --> 01:27:50,623 Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho! 1890 01:27:53,325 --> 01:27:54,890 And one more thing. 1891 01:27:54,892 --> 01:27:56,359 ♪ Oh, what fun it is ♪ 1892 01:27:56,361 --> 01:27:57,193 ♪ To ride in a one-horse ♪ 1893 01:27:57,195 --> 01:27:58,831 ♪ Open sleigh ♪ 1894 01:28:00,098 --> 01:28:02,735 Ho, ho, ho! 1895 01:28:05,370 --> 01:28:06,905 Ho, ho, ho, ho! 1896 01:28:16,749 --> 01:28:19,649 ♪ Oh, jingle bells Jingle bells ♪ 1897 01:28:19,651 --> 01:28:21,784 ♪ Jingle all the way ♪ 1898 01:28:21,786 --> 01:28:23,653 ♪ Oh, what fun it is to... ♪ 1899 01:28:23,655 --> 01:28:25,055 You did it. 1900 01:28:25,057 --> 01:28:26,792 Everyone's so happy. 1901 01:28:27,892 --> 01:28:29,359 You saved Christmas. 1902 01:28:29,361 --> 01:28:31,028 Thanks for doing all this. 1903 01:28:31,030 --> 01:28:32,328 I'm here for you, girl. 1904 01:28:32,330 --> 01:28:34,898 Right by your side. Sticking to you like glue. 1905 01:28:36,067 --> 01:28:37,069 Wow! 1906 01:28:37,870 --> 01:28:38,938 Cute elf. 1907 01:28:40,039 --> 01:28:41,805 Um... 1908 01:28:41,807 --> 01:28:44,207 My little brother's getting his tonsils out. 1909 01:28:44,209 --> 01:28:45,912 You wanna hang with me in the waiting room? 1910 01:28:47,745 --> 01:28:49,080 Laters. 1911 01:28:51,717 --> 01:28:54,016 Now that's a Christmas miracle I can get behind. 1912 01:28:57,021 --> 01:28:58,788 There's a party in Room 220. 1913 01:28:59,924 --> 01:29:01,824 Merry Christmas, everybody! 1914 01:29:01,826 --> 01:29:02,928 Nicky! 1915 01:29:04,228 --> 01:29:05,697 Did you arrange that? 1916 01:29:08,834 --> 01:29:10,100 Thank you. 1917 01:29:10,102 --> 01:29:12,171 I wanted everyone to have a great Christmas. 1918 01:29:13,705 --> 01:29:15,104 Yeah. 1919 01:29:15,106 --> 01:29:18,140 Uh, the... the carolers were a nice touch. 1920 01:29:20,913 --> 01:29:22,045 Nicky... 1921 01:29:22,047 --> 01:29:23,883 Okay, look, honey. 1922 01:29:27,252 --> 01:29:30,252 A father often forgets 1923 01:29:30,254 --> 01:29:34,157 that his little girl will eventually grow up, 1924 01:29:34,159 --> 01:29:37,696 and become their own person. 1925 01:29:38,864 --> 01:29:41,601 I mean, look at you. You... you have. 1926 01:29:42,234 --> 01:29:45,034 And... and I'm sorry, 1927 01:29:45,036 --> 01:29:48,641 I didn't recognize that before but I... I do now. 1928 01:29:50,008 --> 01:29:52,978 And I would love it if you would join us. 1929 01:29:54,512 --> 01:29:56,848 On one condition. 1930 01:29:58,816 --> 01:30:01,152 It's something you actually want to do. 1931 01:30:08,960 --> 01:30:10,029 Oh. 1932 01:30:19,338 --> 01:30:23,006 Sorry I hired an actor to pretend to be you. 1933 01:30:23,008 --> 01:30:25,775 I'm sorry I yelled at your boyfriend. 1934 01:30:25,777 --> 01:30:27,713 I'm sorry I called you a freak. 1935 01:30:30,081 --> 01:30:31,782 Well, I kinda am. 1936 01:30:31,784 --> 01:30:33,183 But I get it. 1937 01:30:35,254 --> 01:30:37,790 And I'm sorry I smothered you with Christmas. 1938 01:30:39,792 --> 01:30:42,125 Thanks, Dad. I... I appreciate you saying that. 1939 01:30:42,127 --> 01:30:45,095 Mm-hmm. But, someday 1940 01:30:45,097 --> 01:30:47,197 when you have kids of your own, 1941 01:30:47,199 --> 01:30:48,864 - you will... - Never, 1942 01:30:48,866 --> 01:30:50,867 do anything like that to them. 1943 01:30:50,869 --> 01:30:52,068 Ever. 1944 01:30:52,070 --> 01:30:53,673 Okay. 1945 01:30:55,139 --> 01:30:56,806 But they're sure gonna love going over 1946 01:30:56,808 --> 01:30:58,209 to Grandpa's house for Christmas. 1947 01:31:03,214 --> 01:31:04,850 - Hey, come on. - Mm-hmm. 1948 01:31:08,219 --> 01:31:10,353 ♪ Open ♪ 1949 01:31:10,355 --> 01:31:12,922 - ♪ Sleigh ♪ - ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪ 1950 01:31:12,924 --> 01:31:14,927 ♪ Jingle all the way, hey ♪ 1951 01:31:38,249 --> 01:31:39,850 Okay, everyone. 1952 01:31:39,852 --> 01:31:41,350 - Oh. - It's Christmas. 1953 01:31:41,352 --> 01:31:44,119 Which means it's hat time! 1954 01:31:44,121 --> 01:31:45,889 - Ooh! - Huh? 1955 01:31:45,891 --> 01:31:47,357 It looks like new. 1956 01:31:47,359 --> 01:31:50,226 Be careful with that, Dad. It's my inheritance, you know, 1957 01:31:50,228 --> 01:31:52,263 if something tragic happens to Nicky. 1958 01:31:53,331 --> 01:31:55,265 Ahem. Who wants to go first? 1959 01:31:55,267 --> 01:31:57,069 - Me! - Oh, come on up here, princess. 1960 01:31:58,570 --> 01:31:59,938 There we go. 1961 01:32:00,338 --> 01:32:02,338 And... 1962 01:32:02,340 --> 01:32:04,407 I'm grateful that my grandma's okay. 1963 01:32:04,409 --> 01:32:07,042 And now the hospital can see my grandma, 1964 01:32:07,044 --> 01:32:09,011 and I love her, and she's the only one 1965 01:32:09,013 --> 01:32:10,180 who knows that I'll sing 1966 01:32:10,182 --> 01:32:11,881 the "Jingle Bells Poo-poo" song right. 1967 01:32:11,883 --> 01:32:13,884 Thank you. 1968 01:32:15,053 --> 01:32:16,385 Yes. 1969 01:32:16,387 --> 01:32:18,153 All right. 1970 01:32:18,155 --> 01:32:21,123 Um, I am grateful that Mom is okay. 1971 01:32:21,125 --> 01:32:23,426 And that Patty from next door is not going to sue us 1972 01:32:23,428 --> 01:32:24,894 for Nicky borrowing her house. 1973 01:32:24,896 --> 01:32:26,262 Here, here. 1974 01:32:26,264 --> 01:32:27,898 Nicky? 1975 01:32:27,900 --> 01:32:29,232 Oh, Um... 1976 01:32:29,234 --> 01:32:30,302 Me first. 1977 01:32:31,602 --> 01:32:32,903 - Hon. - Okay. 1978 01:32:32,905 --> 01:32:34,170 Um... 1979 01:32:36,642 --> 01:32:38,675 I'm grateful 1980 01:32:38,677 --> 01:32:41,912 that I have a family who understands 1981 01:32:41,914 --> 01:32:44,413 my passion for Christmas. 1982 01:32:44,415 --> 01:32:48,318 Christmas can do magic, if you believe. 1983 01:32:48,320 --> 01:32:50,153 I believe, Daddy. 1984 01:32:50,155 --> 01:32:51,253 Aw. 1985 01:32:51,255 --> 01:32:52,792 Sweetie? Yes. 1986 01:32:54,026 --> 01:32:55,259 Ah. 1987 01:32:55,261 --> 01:32:57,661 - Huh? - Why are you giving me that? 1988 01:32:57,663 --> 01:32:58,729 We just wanted you to play 1989 01:32:58,731 --> 01:32:59,962 a little Christmas music for us, sweetie. 1990 01:32:59,964 --> 01:33:02,332 Mom, I can't even look at that thing right now. 1991 01:33:02,334 --> 01:33:04,067 You're so good at it. 1992 01:33:04,069 --> 01:33:05,702 Playing the tuba reminds me of Tanner, 1993 01:33:05,704 --> 01:33:09,005 and how I messed up and lost him forever. 1994 01:33:10,008 --> 01:33:11,942 Hmm. 1995 01:33:11,944 --> 01:33:13,710 Nicky, actually why don't you go next? 1996 01:33:13,712 --> 01:33:14,944 Okay. 1997 01:33:14,946 --> 01:33:16,011 There you go. 1998 01:33:17,648 --> 01:33:19,185 And, uh, remember... 1999 01:33:20,419 --> 01:33:22,217 It can do magic. 2000 01:33:22,219 --> 01:33:23,822 Right. 2001 01:33:33,365 --> 01:33:34,433 What? 2002 01:33:56,221 --> 01:33:57,423 Tanner! 2003 01:34:02,761 --> 01:34:04,330 That hat's magic. 2004 01:34:07,132 --> 01:34:10,332 So which one of my 400 texts convinced you? 2005 01:34:10,334 --> 01:34:13,269 Actually, a very nice man came over this morning, 2006 01:34:13,271 --> 01:34:15,137 told me about all the crazy things he's done 2007 01:34:15,139 --> 01:34:17,474 to his family at Christmas over the years. 2008 01:34:17,476 --> 01:34:19,208 Once he got to that part about you being attacked 2009 01:34:19,210 --> 01:34:21,043 - by a reindeer... - Mm-hmm. 2010 01:34:21,045 --> 01:34:22,914 ...started to understand why you did what you did. 2011 01:34:27,518 --> 01:34:28,887 Thanks, Dad. 2012 01:34:30,454 --> 01:34:32,154 - I wanna thank you. - Oh! 2013 01:34:32,156 --> 01:34:33,523 I needed to see Christmas like this. 2014 01:34:33,525 --> 01:34:35,058 Ah! 2015 01:34:35,060 --> 01:34:37,027 It's what I do. 2016 01:34:40,432 --> 01:34:42,001 Is someone in the cave? 2017 01:34:44,035 --> 01:34:45,036 Sup? 2018 01:34:52,410 --> 01:34:54,413 Maybe Christmas isn't so bad after all. 2019 01:35:05,589 --> 01:35:07,426 - Give me a hand? - Sure. 2020 01:35:08,826 --> 01:35:10,092 Steph? 2021 01:35:10,094 --> 01:35:11,193 Dad? 2022 01:35:11,195 --> 01:35:12,261 Okay. 2023 01:35:12,263 --> 01:35:14,064 - Okay. - On three. 2024 01:35:14,066 --> 01:35:15,434 One, two, three. 2025 01:35:23,075 --> 01:35:25,277 - Come on, Dad. - That's better. 2026 01:36:11,289 --> 01:36:12,921 ♪ Gonna dance with baby Gonna shake it ♪ 2027 01:36:12,923 --> 01:36:16,126 ♪ Gonna be the best dressed Tonight ♪ 2028 01:36:16,128 --> 01:36:17,760 ♪ Wanna sing While the jingle bells ring ♪ 2029 01:36:17,762 --> 01:36:20,630 ♪ 'Cause I'm looking For a wonderful time ♪ 2030 01:36:20,632 --> 01:36:22,599 ♪ Get close girl because ♪ 2031 01:36:22,601 --> 01:36:25,635 ♪ 'Cause there's enough time To ride around the corner ♪ 2032 01:36:25,637 --> 01:36:27,670 ♪ Get cozy as we move Into the mistletoe ♪ 2033 01:36:27,672 --> 01:36:29,872 ♪ Thinking what A colorful life ♪ 2034 01:36:29,874 --> 01:36:34,644 ♪ 'Cause it sure feels like The holidays ♪ 2035 01:36:34,646 --> 01:36:39,149 ♪ Get on your feet And let's celebrate ♪ 2036 01:36:39,151 --> 01:36:41,051 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2037 01:36:41,053 --> 01:36:42,853 - ♪ Yeah that's the feeling ♪ - ♪ That's the feeling ♪ 2038 01:36:42,855 --> 01:36:45,854 - ♪ Oh, yes indeed ♪ - ♪ Oh, yes indeed ♪ 2039 01:36:45,856 --> 01:36:49,425 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ 2040 01:36:49,427 --> 01:36:51,394 - ♪ Joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2041 01:36:51,396 --> 01:36:53,261 - ♪ 'Cause it's the season ♪ - ♪ It's the season ♪ 2042 01:36:53,263 --> 01:36:55,864 - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ 2043 01:36:55,866 --> 01:36:58,637 ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ 2044 01:37:03,642 --> 01:37:06,309 ♪ Cinnamon whiskey Warming up the coffee ♪ 2045 01:37:06,311 --> 01:37:08,243 ♪ Everybody fire a side ♪ 2046 01:37:08,245 --> 01:37:11,180 ♪ Hanging up the stockings Tearing off the wrapping ♪ 2047 01:37:11,182 --> 01:37:13,616 ♪ See my Secret Santa tonight ♪ 2048 01:37:13,618 --> 01:37:15,551 ♪ Yeah, the blizzard Got us all snowed in ♪ 2049 01:37:15,553 --> 01:37:18,488 ♪ Ain't nobody going nowhere ♪ 2050 01:37:18,490 --> 01:37:20,223 ♪ Once you're here Bring the cheer fill my cup ♪ 2051 01:37:20,225 --> 01:37:22,658 ♪ With the holly And the jolly all right ♪ 2052 01:37:22,660 --> 01:37:27,564 ♪ 'Cause it sure feels like The holidays ♪ 2053 01:37:27,566 --> 01:37:31,701 ♪ Get on your feet And let's celebrate ♪ 2054 01:37:31,703 --> 01:37:34,304 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ 2055 01:37:34,306 --> 01:37:36,105 - ♪ Yeah that's the feeling ♪ - ♪ That's the feeling ♪ 2056 01:37:36,107 --> 01:37:38,942 - ♪ Oh, yes indeed ♪ - ♪ Oh, yes indeed ♪ 2057 01:37:38,944 --> 01:37:42,278 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2058 01:37:42,280 --> 01:37:44,247 - ♪ Joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2059 01:37:44,249 --> 01:37:46,114 - ♪ 'Cause it's the season ♪ - ♪ It's the season ♪ 2060 01:37:46,116 --> 01:37:48,585 - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ 2061 01:37:48,587 --> 01:37:51,623 ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ 2062 01:38:01,432 --> 01:38:03,332 - ♪ Joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2063 01:38:03,334 --> 01:38:04,934 - ♪ Yeah that's the feeling ♪ - ♪ That's the feeling ♪ 2064 01:38:04,936 --> 01:38:07,703 - ♪ Oh, yes indeed ♪ - ♪ Yes indeed ♪ 2065 01:38:07,705 --> 01:38:10,340 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2066 01:38:10,342 --> 01:38:12,309 - ♪ Ooh, joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2067 01:38:12,311 --> 01:38:14,176 - ♪ 'Cause it's the season ♪ - ♪ It's the season ♪ 2068 01:38:14,178 --> 01:38:17,412 - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ 2069 01:38:17,414 --> 01:38:19,681 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2070 01:38:19,683 --> 01:38:22,252 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2071 01:38:22,254 --> 01:38:24,554 - ♪ Yeah that's the feeling ♪ - ♪ That's the feeling ♪ 2072 01:38:24,556 --> 01:38:26,989 - ♪ Oh, yes indeed ♪ - ♪ Oh, yes indeed ♪ 2073 01:38:26,991 --> 01:38:30,359 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2074 01:38:30,361 --> 01:38:32,328 - ♪ Joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2075 01:38:32,330 --> 01:38:34,197 - ♪ 'Cause it's the season ♪ - ♪ It's the season ♪ 2076 01:38:34,199 --> 01:38:36,966 - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ - ♪ I got a feeling ♪ 2077 01:38:36,968 --> 01:38:39,337 - ♪ It's gonna be joyful ♪ - ♪ Joyful ♪ 2078 01:38:43,374 --> 01:38:45,742 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 2079 01:38:45,744 --> 01:38:48,543 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat Yes, I do ♪ 2080 01:38:48,545 --> 01:38:51,381 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat You're adorable ♪ 2081 01:38:51,383 --> 01:38:54,384 ♪ Life without you Would be horrible ♪ 2082 01:38:54,386 --> 01:38:56,618 ♪ No one makes me work ♪ 2083 01:38:56,620 --> 01:38:59,421 ♪ Like my little bundle of fur ♪ 2084 01:38:59,423 --> 01:39:04,195 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 2085 01:39:05,496 --> 01:39:06,996 ♪ When you're down ♪ 2086 01:39:06,998 --> 01:39:10,733 ♪ And feeling blue ♪ 2087 01:39:10,735 --> 01:39:12,534 ♪ Here's that thing ♪ 2088 01:39:12,536 --> 01:39:16,305 - ♪ That you must do ♪ - ♪ Gotta do it ♪ 2089 01:39:16,307 --> 01:39:18,507 ♪ Make a B-line ♪ 2090 01:39:18,509 --> 01:39:21,476 - ♪ For the nearest feline ♪ - ♪ Kitty cat ♪ 2091 01:39:21,478 --> 01:39:25,381 ♪ Then your trouble Will be through ♪ 2092 01:39:25,383 --> 01:39:26,881 ♪ Cheeseburger ♪ 2093 01:39:26,883 --> 01:39:28,350 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 2094 01:39:28,352 --> 01:39:31,586 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat Yes, I do ♪ 2095 01:39:31,588 --> 01:39:34,424 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat You're adorable ♪ 2096 01:39:34,426 --> 01:39:36,792 ♪ Life without you Would be horrible ♪ 2097 01:39:36,794 --> 01:39:39,628 ♪ No one makes me work ♪ 2098 01:39:39,630 --> 01:39:42,398 ♪ Like my little bundle of fur ♪ 2099 01:39:42,400 --> 01:39:47,603 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 2100 01:39:47,605 --> 01:39:52,343 ♪ Kitty cat, kitty cat I love you ♪ 2101 01:39:55,482 --> 01:39:57,274 Subtitles by explosiveskull