﻿1
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<font color="cyan"><font size=-2>♪Subtitles & translation by♪</font> <font color="grey"> <b>XQ2☻</b>

2
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Let's go!

3
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Let's go.

4
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At last we meet, Captain Dark.

5
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It didn't work.

6
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It didn't work.

7
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In the middle there...

8
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It's all in mist...

9
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the window didn't
'explose' right...

10
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and it's very difficult for me
to do everything in one shot.

11
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You know, I'm 47 years old...

12
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What's that got to do with it?

13
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He didn't bring
John Woo to Hollywood!

14
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He should be kissing my ass.

15
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The motherfucker!

16
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He still doesn't get that
I'm not making Citizen Kane, here.

17
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The fact that you
don't use firearms

18
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symbolizes the purity
of the character.

19
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Purity of the...☻

20
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<i>OK, people get ready, we got
another shot in 20 minutes.</i>

21
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<i>20 minutes, people,
let's get ready</i>

22
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This isn't about the adults.

23
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We're talking about a child.

24
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An environment.

25
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My client...

26
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is "aware"...

27
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of the responsibilities
of raising a child.

28
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She lives a quiet, peaceful life.

29
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On the other hand, we have an actor here,
who's obviously disgruntled.

30
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Whose known past problems,
I just mentioned,

31
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are less than ambiguous.

32
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And whose entire career experience

33
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is with films, whose values

34
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no responsible, "aware" parent

35
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would ever want to expose
their children to,

36
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including myself, Your Honor.

37
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Violence!

38
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That's all on film, Your Honor.

39
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The legitimacy of violence.

40
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How does this actor play death?

41
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Let me count the ways.

42
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Mangled under the
wheels a truck.

43
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Strangulation.

44
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Fracturing the skull.

45
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Taking out the 'tibula'.

46
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Monsieur Van Damme!

47
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- They were low budgets.
- M. Van Damme!

48
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Every one of my movies
were having heart!

49
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Laceration.

50
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Crushed under the 'vehicles' of a car.

51
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Death by strangulation...
Crushed ribs.

52
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I make money with this.
I feed them!

53
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- Please be seated...
- It's all about money!

54
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- Fracturing the skull.
- Allez, one more!

55
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- Gouging out the eyes.
- Again! Again!

56
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Kicks to the groin.

57
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- Can I go restroom, please?
- Crushed under the 'vehicles' of a car.

58
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- Thank you.
- Crushed under the wheels of a truck.

59
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Gouging out the eyes.

60
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Crushing the skull.

61
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<i>Shit!</i>

62
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<i>- Take off! Immediately! Take off!
- Alright!</i>

63
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Look at that Arab's mug
in the film!

64
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See the beard?

65
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Ever see a guy like that
on a plane or a bus?

66
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Tell me, does he look like me?

67
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The movie's from '86.

68
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Ever see something,
and years later,

69
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:17,155
you get a notion that it's not
the same thing you saw before?

70
00:07:17,209 --> 00:07:20,989
Cut the crap, Chuck Norris didn't
put Bin Laden up to 9-11.

71
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Anyway, Chuck Norris
works for the CIA.

72
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Yesterday it was Schwarzenegger.

73
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Sure, in "True Lies" the Arabs
are as frantic as hyenas being throttled!

74
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Action films gotta have bad guys.

75
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That's what I'm saying!

76
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In the 70's, it was Viet
Kong, now it's Arabs.

77
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Stallone in Rambo III,
Rutger Hauer in Wanted: Dead or Alive

78
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Bruce Willis in The Siege,

79
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Steven Seagal in
Executive Decision?

80
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What's his name, Mark Wahlberg
who takes on all of Iraq...

81
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- Jean-Claude Van Damme!
- He never beat up Arabs!

82
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No, Van Damme's outside!

83
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Hey, M. Van Damme, wait!
I'm a great fan!

84
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- How are you?
- Fine and you? - Fine.

85
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- Why're you in Schaerbeek, lost?
- Going to the post office.

86
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A quick photo for
our Video Club? - OK.

87
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Thanks!
Look, it's Van Damme!

88
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Hello!

89
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Say hello later.
Take the photo first.

90
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Yeah! Yes!

91
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Your turn, now.
Jean-Claude Van Damme!

92
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OK, good?

93
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Wait, my grandma loves you...

94
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In 5 minutes!

95
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Thanks, M. Van Damme.

96
00:08:24,911 --> 00:08:26,906
Wow, Jean-Claude Van Damme!

97
00:08:26,946 --> 00:08:28,106
Cool, dude!

98
00:08:28,166 --> 00:08:29,591
I thought he'd be taller.

99
00:08:29,616 --> 00:08:31,996
He's a little shrimp.
But a nice guy.

100
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Classy, huh!

101
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Great tan!

102
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He'll be back in 5 minutes.

103
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- Did this guy cure cancer?
- Why? Did you?

104
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No, and nobody fawns
all over me, either.

105
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He's a star! He left this
shithole, for Hollywood.

106
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He struggled to get where he is.

107
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Farthest you've gone is,
Zaventem airport!

108
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Star, construction worker, or dog,
I couldn't give a fuck!

109
00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:54,922
Then why are you waiting for him?
This isn't a taxi stand!

110
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He's just some guy.

111
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Back away from the car!

112
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Calm down, madame!

113
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Back off,

114
00:09:02,927 --> 00:09:04,020
Calm down.

115
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Get outta my face!

116
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- Help me, officer.
- You can't park here.

117
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- I'm waiting for a fare, 2 minutes!
- She's waiting for her idol.

118
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- What idol?
- Jean-Claude Van Damme.

119
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- Who?
- Jean-Claude Van Damme!

120
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Go on, don't BS!

121
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"Aware!"

122
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- We have pictures.
- Look.

123
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- What's he like?
- Great guy!

124
00:09:22,045 --> 00:09:24,741
He's like anybody else, officer,
believe me.

125
00:09:24,791 --> 00:09:27,193
I don't believe that.
The guy's a star.

126
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He left this filthy town,
went to Hollywood

127
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and struggled to get
where he is.

128
00:09:32,161 --> 00:09:34,998
How far have you gone, Zaventem?

129
00:09:35,097 --> 00:09:36,764
Zaventem, so what?

130
00:09:36,864 --> 00:09:38,508
Ass-lickers!

131
00:09:39,016 --> 00:09:40,130
What'd you say?

132
00:09:40,187 --> 00:09:42,726
I was talking to them, officer.
Help me out!

133
00:09:42,843 --> 00:09:44,663
I was talking to them. Please!

134
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Improperly inflated tire.
Vehicle Registration!

135
00:09:46,610 --> 00:09:47,742
Oh, officer! Dont...

136
00:09:47,798 --> 00:09:48,904
Vehicle papers!

137
00:09:48,929 --> 00:09:52,358
- Don't ruin my day, please!
- I asked for your papers!

138
00:09:52,484 --> 00:09:55,349
As usual, I get shit,
thanks a lot guys!

139
00:09:55,396 --> 00:09:58,200
- Anytime, Madame.
- You'll pay for this!

140
00:10:01,345 --> 00:10:02,505
Fuck, shit!

141
00:10:02,582 --> 00:10:04,409
Take cover!

142
00:10:09,410 --> 00:10:11,203
For once, it's not my fault!

143
00:10:11,547 --> 00:10:13,238
Be quiet, Madame!

144
00:10:18,505 --> 00:10:19,857
Stop, goddamit!

145
00:10:27,033 --> 00:10:28,377
Don't stay here!

146
00:10:29,457 --> 00:10:31,026
Go away!

147
00:10:31,527 --> 00:10:33,007
Get out!

148
00:10:33,525 --> 00:10:34,685
Get lost!

149
00:10:34,795 --> 00:10:35,855
Shit!

150
00:10:45,835 --> 00:10:48,204
Open up!
What's going on inside?

151
00:10:48,621 --> 00:10:50,047
What's going on!

152
00:10:54,684 --> 00:10:55,899
Hey!

153
00:11:51,117 --> 00:11:52,303
Get down!

154
00:12:08,667 --> 00:12:10,442
Unit 27 to Central.

155
00:12:10,531 --> 00:12:13,897
Jean-Claude Van Damme's robbing
the post office on rue du Pavillon.

156
00:12:13,922 --> 00:12:15,097
Send back-up.

157
00:12:15,145 --> 00:12:16,896
He may have hostages.

158
00:12:16,942 --> 00:12:20,131
Repeat: possible
hostage situation.

159
00:12:21,593 --> 00:12:24,777
{\an5}1. The Answer before the Question

160
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<i>He's at his daughter's
custody trial.</i>

161
00:12:32,205 --> 00:12:34,450
<i>He can't approach
his ex-wife...</i>

162
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He picked up!
He picked up!

163
00:12:40,887 --> 00:12:42,091
Hello.

164
00:12:44,570 --> 00:12:46,804
(What'll get through to him?)

165
00:12:48,131 --> 00:12:49,989
Monsieur Van Damme?

166
00:12:53,034 --> 00:12:54,223
<i>Hello.</i>

167
00:12:54,349 --> 00:12:57,137
M. Van Damme,
Commissioner Bruges, here.

168
00:12:57,184 --> 00:12:58,982
How are things in there?

169
00:13:00,630 --> 00:13:02,074
<i>Could be better.</i>

170
00:13:02,396 --> 00:13:04,615
Let's proceed in
order of importance,

171
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is anyone injured?

172
00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:10,817
Hello? Jean-Claude?

173
00:13:11,211 --> 00:13:12,583
<i>No, no, there's...</i>

174
00:13:12,955 --> 00:13:16,278
<i>an unconscious man, who's bleeding.</i>
- Fine, Jean-Claude...

175
00:13:16,405 --> 00:13:19,240
may I call you Jean-Claude?

176
00:13:19,265 --> 00:13:22,963
I'm Commissioner Bruges, Christian Bruges.
Call me Christian.

177
00:13:23,623 --> 00:13:26,102
Above all, you must
release the injured man.

178
00:13:26,148 --> 00:13:28,448
It's not in your interest, or mine

179
00:13:28,479 --> 00:13:31,625
to have a cadaver on our hands.
Do you agree?

180
00:13:32,864 --> 00:13:34,065
Hello?

181
00:13:42,236 --> 00:13:44,155
<i>Will you agree to release him?</i>

182
00:13:44,232 --> 00:13:46,946
<i>No, no. Nobody leaves.
It's impossible.</i>

183
00:13:53,255 --> 00:13:56,114
What if I came there
with a doctor?... Hello?

184
00:13:56,194 --> 00:13:57,530
<i>Jean-Claude?</i>

185
00:13:57,787 --> 00:14:00,176
<i>Hello? What if I came with a doctor?</i>

186
00:14:00,262 --> 00:14:01,605
<i>OK, but unarmed.</i>

187
00:14:01,707 --> 00:14:03,676
You have my word, M. Van Damme.

188
00:14:03,730 --> 00:14:04,970
Commissioner Bruges?

189
00:14:05,006 --> 00:14:06,750
Get a medic, please!

190
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:08,962
Commander Perthier,
Special Team.

191
00:14:09,019 --> 00:14:11,472
I just spoke with Van Damme.
One moment.

192
00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:14,637
Let's do this: I'll go in, personally,
then, debrief,

193
00:14:14,739 --> 00:14:15,888
if need be.

194
00:14:15,976 --> 00:14:18,663
- I'd like to deploy my men on...
- It's premature.

195
00:14:18,700 --> 00:14:21,185
Got a bulletproof vest,
by any chance?

196
00:14:21,239 --> 00:14:22,400
I'll give it back.

197
00:14:22,447 --> 00:14:23,529
Jackie.

198
00:14:23,703 --> 00:14:25,229
The doctor, please!

199
00:14:28,073 --> 00:14:31,278
I asked for a medic!
Any chance of getting a medic?

200
00:14:31,325 --> 00:14:32,997
Eric went to med school.

201
00:14:33,071 --> 00:14:34,267
Let's go. Allez!

202
00:14:34,470 --> 00:14:35,704
Boss!

203
00:14:40,101 --> 00:14:42,225
Hello? Jean-Claude?

204
00:14:42,873 --> 00:14:44,130
No! You...

205
00:14:44,821 --> 00:14:46,841
You have my word that...

206
00:14:49,198 --> 00:14:52,023
Jean-Claude,
we're here to find a sol...

207
00:14:58,592 --> 00:14:59,756
What?

208
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:38,031
<i>Here we see the chief of police

209
00:15:38,074 --> 00:15:41,471
<i>leaving the video club,
his temporary crisis HQ,

210
00:15:41,565 --> 00:15:45,182
<i>making his way to the post office
in minimal attire.

211
00:15:45,274 --> 00:15:48,634
<i>Is Van Damme trying to
ridicule the police force?

212
00:15:48,659 --> 00:15:51,639
If so, the ploy is working,
because...

213
00:15:51,705 --> 00:15:55,259
the actor seems to have
captured the public's sympathy

214
00:15:55,300 --> 00:15:57,619
<i>in spite of this morning's events.

215
00:15:57,660 --> 00:15:59,200
[Un-der-pants!]
[Clap, clap, clap]

216
00:15:59,415 --> 00:16:00,982
[Un-der-pants!]
[Clap, clap, clap]

217
00:16:01,144 --> 00:16:03,443
[Un-der-pants!]
[Clap, clap, clap]...

218
00:16:41,763 --> 00:16:43,715
Don't shoot, I'm a hostage!

219
00:17:13,213 --> 00:17:14,921
Put down the case.

220
00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:19,535
Slide it over.

221
00:17:22,936 --> 00:17:24,237
Check the case.

222
00:17:42,482 --> 00:17:44,973
OK, go to...
the room at the end.

223
00:17:51,274 --> 00:17:52,899
Go on, he's bleeding!

224
00:17:54,274 --> 00:17:56,065
No tricks, Jean-Claude.

225
00:18:03,472 --> 00:18:05,831
<i>Van Damme's celebrity
has attracted</i>

226
00:18:05,902 --> 00:18:08,998
<i>a lot of his fans, here
to support him.</i>

227
00:18:09,082 --> 00:18:10,769
<i>His slightest move</i>

228
00:18:10,863 --> 00:18:15,035
<i>fires up the crowd to
chant "Jean-Claude"</i>

229
00:18:15,127 --> 00:18:18,681
<i>or chant taunts at the police,
like the one we just heard</i>

230
00:18:18,767 --> 00:18:21,458
<i>about the
Commissioner's underpants.</i>

231
00:18:21,582 --> 00:18:24,739
<i>But the situation remains
tense and dramatic.</i>

232
00:18:26,986 --> 00:18:29,382
Like that, Monsieur. Don't move.

233
00:18:31,257 --> 00:18:33,430
What am I doing here?

234
00:18:33,895 --> 00:18:35,325
You're not... ohh!

235
00:18:35,365 --> 00:18:36,958
- Calm down, Monsieur.
- Ohh!

236
00:18:36,999 --> 00:18:39,529
- Don't move.
- Ohh! What...

237
00:18:40,116 --> 00:18:41,902
What's this crap?

238
00:18:42,501 --> 00:18:44,029
No, Jean-Claude, no!

239
00:18:59,238 --> 00:19:00,411
Jean-Claude!

240
00:19:00,435 --> 00:19:02,112
Don't move! Get lost

241
00:19:02,393 --> 00:19:04,086
Calm down, Jean-Claude!

242
00:19:04,794 --> 00:19:06,362
Piss off!

243
00:19:10,382 --> 00:19:12,732
Raise the shutter. Help them!

244
00:19:23,843 --> 00:19:25,132
Well done, Jean-Claude.

245
00:19:25,186 --> 00:19:28,819
High five, Jean-Claude!
You're the man! How'd you do it?

246
00:19:28,850 --> 00:19:30,161
- Hey, woah!
- Seriously...

247
00:19:30,193 --> 00:19:32,222
- What's this?
- See what he did?

248
00:19:32,247 --> 00:19:35,193
Think this is a movie?
All he did, was blow it!

249
00:19:35,224 --> 00:19:36,896
Put him with the others quick!

250
00:19:36,935 --> 00:19:39,068
Don't tell me to calm
down, asshole!

251
00:19:39,093 --> 00:19:42,351
You better figure a way out
or I'll start shooting...

252
00:19:43,172 --> 00:19:44,872
How do you do it Jean-Claude?

253
00:19:44,944 --> 00:19:46,200
How do you give a guy

254
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:48,965
a kick and a punch in the
balls at the same time?

255
00:19:48,990 --> 00:19:51,868
It's great!
You're too fast for me, I swear.

256
00:19:53,383 --> 00:19:56,104
Sit. You earned a rest,
Jean-Claude.

257
00:20:04,068 --> 00:20:08,639
<i>Police efforts so far don't seem
to be improving the situation.</i>

258
00:20:08,744 --> 00:20:11,740
<i>The commissioner has
left the Post Office</i>

259
00:20:11,814 --> 00:20:16,250
<i>And the policeman who
accompanied him seems injured.</i>

260
00:20:16,509 --> 00:20:18,234
Hey, what's with you?

261
00:20:18,548 --> 00:20:20,874
Don't you see he saved his life!

262
00:20:21,117 --> 00:20:23,163
He saved all our lives!

263
00:20:23,360 --> 00:20:25,756
Jean-Claude!
He's still out cold.

264
00:20:26,386 --> 00:20:27,762
What a fag!

265
00:20:31,013 --> 00:20:33,394
You better find a way to
get us outta here quick.

266
00:20:33,425 --> 00:20:36,715
Or I'll shoot one an hour,
starting with our national hero.

267
00:20:36,747 --> 00:20:38,699
They don't suspect anything.

268
00:20:38,756 --> 00:20:40,724
We can demand anything.

269
00:20:42,582 --> 00:20:45,246
We demand a ransom
and leave with him as hostage.

270
00:20:45,294 --> 00:20:47,258
A million! We can
demand a million!

271
00:20:47,283 --> 00:20:49,596
A million? Where from?
You see a million, here?

272
00:20:49,643 --> 00:20:51,940
Ever see a million, huh?
Ever?

273
00:20:51,995 --> 00:20:54,871
Where do you think you are?
In a post office!

274
00:20:54,896 --> 00:20:57,333
Yeah but, he's a star!
It's Van Damme, dammit!

275
00:20:57,362 --> 00:21:00,712
They expect us to demand
more than a plate of shit!

276
00:21:04,435 --> 00:21:06,418
He leaves with us and the money.

277
00:21:06,443 --> 00:21:10,188
And we let the hostages rat us out
after we're gone, huh?

278
00:21:14,897 --> 00:21:16,921
That's what I call a brain!

279
00:21:17,529 --> 00:21:20,473
<i>You know what your
little trick got us?</i>

280
00:21:20,622 --> 00:21:22,568
- You realize?
- I'll tell you someth...

281
00:21:22,599 --> 00:21:25,466
Wanna cry at my funeral, huh?
You're not the FBI, got it?

282
00:21:25,505 --> 00:21:26,700
I was talking...

283
00:21:26,755 --> 00:21:29,670
Go to Hollywood for drama,
I'm trying to do my job, here!

284
00:21:29,732 --> 00:21:33,411
Fuck your black action-men!
They're no better than us, naked.

285
00:21:33,436 --> 00:21:35,097
We shoot him!
End of discussion!

286
00:21:35,122 --> 00:21:38,357
We're not here to shoot people
but to save human lives!

287
00:21:38,382 --> 00:21:42,021
Exactly! To save human lives,
that's what it takes.

288
00:21:42,046 --> 00:21:44,380
Are you telling me
how to do my job?

289
00:21:44,440 --> 00:21:46,302
You just shut up, huh?

290
00:21:46,490 --> 00:21:48,433
'Cause the uniforms are coming.

291
00:21:48,458 --> 00:21:50,440
- Get lost!
- Get fucked! - Get fucked?

292
00:21:50,465 --> 00:21:52,253
Just piss off.

293
00:21:58,603 --> 00:22:01,565
Had your laughs?
Pretty funny, huh?

294
00:22:03,063 --> 00:22:04,764
What about the kid?

295
00:22:05,983 --> 00:22:07,452
The kid.

296
00:22:08,214 --> 00:22:10,058
We take the kid with us.

297
00:22:10,207 --> 00:22:13,456
You know anyone who'd have
no problem with

298
00:22:13,481 --> 00:22:15,652
a dead kid on their conscience?

299
00:22:15,693 --> 00:22:16,900
Yes.

300
00:22:28,817 --> 00:22:30,137
Boss!

301
00:22:30,864 --> 00:22:32,223
<i>Hello.</i>

302
00:22:33,176 --> 00:22:35,349
<i>- Blood...</i>
- Yes, Jean-Claude?

303
00:22:35,434 --> 00:22:37,605
<i>Blood causes your
bullshit to flow.</i>

304
00:22:37,630 --> 00:22:39,980
Jean-Claude, It's not my doing.
The SWAT team...

305
00:22:40,005 --> 00:22:43,190
took initiative without telling me.
If I knew, I swear I'd...

306
00:22:43,228 --> 00:22:45,433
<i>- I have a list of demands.</i>
- Yes.

307
00:22:45,999 --> 00:22:48,254
You gotta do something
about the kid

308
00:22:48,279 --> 00:22:50,896
<i>first of all, Jean-Claude.
The kid...</i>

309
00:22:50,973 --> 00:22:52,887
<i>y-you have to release him.</i>

310
00:22:53,112 --> 00:22:54,488
<i>Negative.</i>

311
00:22:55,138 --> 00:22:57,796
- You have enough hostages!
<i>- Cut the crap!</i>

312
00:22:57,851 --> 00:23:00,009
- You want the list or not?
<i>- Yes, I'm listening.</i>

313
00:23:00,062 --> 00:23:01,886
<i>You have enough hostages!</i>

314
00:23:01,955 --> 00:23:05,513
<i>OK, I want a million euros
in small bills.</i> - Yes.

315
00:23:05,575 --> 00:23:08,698
Unmarked, with different
serial numbers.<i> - Yeah.</i>

316
00:23:08,796 --> 00:23:12,280
I want a bus to the airport,
and a fuelled jet waiting.

317
00:23:12,305 --> 00:23:15,497
I'll communicate the destination
to the pilot, later. Voilà!

318
00:23:15,536 --> 00:23:18,997
<i>Jean-Claude... - No tricks and
the hostages will be freed.</i>

319
00:23:19,044 --> 00:23:20,810
You're asking a lot.

320
00:23:21,036 --> 00:23:23,259
Honestly, you realize that...

321
00:23:24,058 --> 00:23:26,118
I... Jean-Claude...

322
00:23:27,837 --> 00:23:28,910
Jean-Claude?

323
00:23:28,966 --> 00:23:30,813
- It won't work.
- What?

324
00:23:30,858 --> 00:23:32,884
Look, I'm Jean-Claude Van Damme.

325
00:23:32,909 --> 00:23:35,224
It's inconsistent with my image,
it's bullshit.

326
00:23:35,294 --> 00:23:37,472
We need something less realistic.

327
00:23:37,538 --> 00:23:39,098
What do you suggest?

328
00:23:39,575 --> 00:23:41,194
Hold on, I have an idea.

329
00:23:41,669 --> 00:23:44,311
Listen, I'll also need a...

330
00:23:44,575 --> 00:23:46,904
a sum of 465,000 dollars...

331
00:23:47,029 --> 00:23:48,042
Yes.

332
00:23:48,067 --> 00:23:50,857
<i>Delivered before noon,
to the firm...</i>

333
00:23:50,919 --> 00:23:54,385
Bernstein, Katz and Phillis.
It's located at...

334
00:23:58,231 --> 00:23:59,455
He hung up.

335
00:23:59,885 --> 00:24:01,510
What's this crap? A code?

336
00:24:01,535 --> 00:24:03,033
No, it's more consistent.

337
00:24:03,087 --> 00:24:05,589
- Who are those guys?
- My lawyers in LA.

338
00:24:05,678 --> 00:24:07,558
- You shitting me?
- He's right, imbecile.

339
00:24:07,583 --> 00:24:09,485
- He's in a custody trial
- Shut up!

340
00:24:09,510 --> 00:24:11,893
Get back!
You left them alone!

341
00:24:12,801 --> 00:24:15,070
- Watch your tone.
- I'll use any tone, shut up!

342
00:24:15,095 --> 00:24:16,622
- Speak civil, OK?
- Get back!

343
00:24:16,677 --> 00:24:19,073
- I'm not your little brother!
- Go back!

344
00:24:19,186 --> 00:24:22,076
Hey, "David Carradine",
I'll go when I decide.

345
00:24:22,091 --> 00:24:25,263
Go back, your idol will join you.
Shit faced, ass-licker!

346
00:24:25,288 --> 00:24:26,533
I'm staying.

347
00:24:27,974 --> 00:24:29,235
Now, I'm going.

348
00:24:29,529 --> 00:24:30,590
OK, then go!

349
00:24:30,645 --> 00:24:33,720
He's right. A movie star
who steals a million...

350
00:24:33,778 --> 00:24:35,048
it's ridiculous.

351
00:24:35,134 --> 00:24:38,494
But a star demanding
money for lawyer fees

352
00:24:38,718 --> 00:24:40,341
looks more desperate.

353
00:24:40,406 --> 00:24:42,398
Damn, not bad at all!

354
00:24:43,287 --> 00:24:44,991
Go back with the others.

355
00:24:45,060 --> 00:24:46,982
With the others, I said!

356
00:24:58,530 --> 00:25:00,322
Look at those idiots!

357
00:25:02,199 --> 00:25:04,787
<i>Exactly: 1 + 1 = 1.
It's still you.</i>

358
00:25:05,201 --> 00:25:06,779
<i>- It's love.
- 2 in 1.</i>

359
00:25:06,871 --> 00:25:09,146
In our world: 1+1 = 2

360
00:25:09,265 --> 00:25:10,843
<i>and 2+2 = 4.</i>

361
00:25:10,951 --> 00:25:14,591
<i>So we become "selfish",
we take money and don't share it.</i>

362
00:25:14,669 --> 00:25:16,545
<i>But if 1+1 = 1,</i>

363
00:25:16,683 --> 00:25:19,070
<i>or maybe 1+1 = 11.</i>

364
00:25:19,315 --> 00:25:20,507
<i>That's beautiful!</i>

365
00:25:20,597 --> 00:25:23,050
<i>I got back from Belgium today,</i>

366
00:25:23,175 --> 00:25:25,008
<i>I was at my mother's place...</i>

367
00:25:25,088 --> 00:25:27,466
What names did he say,
in English?

368
00:25:27,514 --> 00:25:29,466
- Bernstein.
- What?

369
00:25:29,809 --> 00:25:31,309
Leon Bernstein.

370
00:25:35,442 --> 00:25:39,263
<i>Now, we don't think horizontally,
we think vertically.</i>

371
00:25:39,317 --> 00:25:40,962
<i>We stand straight in life.</i>

372
00:25:40,997 --> 00:25:44,011
<i>We don't think in hours
or seconds, it's all "neutral".</i>

373
00:25:44,047 --> 00:25:47,083
<i>The serpent, Adam and Eve,
I don't buy it anymore.</i>

374
00:25:47,142 --> 00:25:48,949
<i>Because a serpent is nice.</i>

375
00:25:48,974 --> 00:25:51,584
<i>And an apple's good,
it contains pectin.</i>

376
00:25:51,609 --> 00:25:53,483
<i>It reduces cholesterol.</i>

377
00:25:53,909 --> 00:25:56,143
<i>I dunno how an apple
can harm a woman.</i>

378
00:25:56,169 --> 00:25:58,818
<i>There are people who haven't succeeded,</i>

379
00:25:58,856 --> 00:26:02,142
<i>because they're not "aware".
(not au courant)</i>

380
00:26:02,216 --> 00:26:05,870
<i>They've no intention
of knowing they exist.</i>

381
00:26:06,373 --> 00:26:10,490
<i>Poor things, they don't know.
But, I'm "aware", I've awakened.</i>

382
00:26:10,522 --> 00:26:11,657
What's "aware"?

383
00:26:11,708 --> 00:26:14,827
<i>When you wake up you wonder,
what am I doing in this...?</i>

384
00:26:14,918 --> 00:26:17,289
<i>- OK, never mind.
- Peopke talk about wavelengths...</i>

385
00:26:17,314 --> 00:26:21,312
<i>but dolphins use them too;
a very intelligent animal in the sea.</i>

386
00:26:21,337 --> 00:26:22,712
<i>We live on land.</i>

387
00:26:22,786 --> 00:26:25,538
<i>They communicate,
without speaking blah-blah-blah...</i>

388
00:26:30,460 --> 00:26:31,685
<i>Gloria,</i>

389
00:26:31,787 --> 00:26:35,134
<i>would you rather live with
your mommy or your daddy?</i>

390
00:26:39,913 --> 00:26:42,119
<i>I don't wanna live with Dad.</i>

391
00:26:42,874 --> 00:26:44,333
<i>Why, Gloria?</i>

392
00:26:47,712 --> 00:26:52,453
Every time my dad is on a TV show,
my friends make fun of me.

393
00:26:53,093 --> 00:26:55,629
<i>- But you love your daddy?
- Yes.</i>

394
00:26:56,428 --> 00:26:58,858
<i>But you rather stay
with your mom.</i>

395
00:27:02,275 --> 00:27:05,245
I want them to stop
'make' fun of me.

396
00:27:07,355 --> 00:27:09,991
<i>Thank you, Gloria.
You may be excused.</i>

397
00:27:31,336 --> 00:27:34,431
<i>I think it's November
10th or 15th.</i>

398
00:27:37,997 --> 00:27:39,866
<i>OK, well... anyway...</i>

399
00:27:40,472 --> 00:27:43,277
<i>Now, there's no special requirements.</i>

400
00:27:43,613 --> 00:27:45,323
<i>You don't have to do
any training,</i>

401
00:27:45,363 --> 00:27:47,302
<i>You don't have to be in
any kind of good shape.</i>

402
00:27:47,351 --> 00:27:50,036
<i>They'll put you in shape
on the shoot.</i>

403
00:27:50,176 --> 00:27:53,040
<i>- And, like I said...</i>
- The commission? <i>- Huh?</i>

404
00:27:53,138 --> 00:27:55,016
- What's your commission?
<i>- Normal.</i>

405
00:27:55,078 --> 00:27:56,704
No, no. The one I was...

406
00:27:57,344 --> 00:27:59,962
<i>10%... but I'll take 8.</i>

407
00:28:00,839 --> 00:28:03,185
They'll kill my career,
those guys.

408
00:28:03,553 --> 00:28:07,633
You get good money, they send me
to Bulgaria, in the fucking factory.

409
00:28:07,685 --> 00:28:10,010
They're making the movie for
like, what, a million dollars?

410
00:28:10,081 --> 00:28:11,889
<i>No, no, you're exaggerating!
Look..</i>

411
00:28:11,945 --> 00:28:13,622
With the 30% sales fee.

412
00:28:13,686 --> 00:28:16,286
<i>You're exaggerating that.
This movie is huge in Asia!</i>

413
00:28:16,343 --> 00:28:19,060
I know, 6 million dollars!
<i>- Yeah...</i>

414
00:28:19,397 --> 00:28:22,223
Foreign, 30%, 1.8

415
00:28:22,707 --> 00:28:26,302
Producing fee,
1.250... million. OK?

416
00:28:26,358 --> 00:28:28,341
<i>Why do you do this shit to yourself?
That's my job...</i>

417
00:28:28,372 --> 00:28:30,936
I get paid 4 million dollars,
how much is left for the picture?

418
00:28:30,961 --> 00:28:32,884
<i>C'mon man, that's my job!
Let me worry about that.</i>

419
00:28:32,911 --> 00:28:34,992
I would take less money...
<i>- Yeah?</i>

420
00:28:35,017 --> 00:28:37,122
And put me in a fucking studio.

421
00:28:37,180 --> 00:28:40,584
If they get me for free.
One movie only, for free; Van Damme,

422
00:28:40,615 --> 00:28:42,833
it's worth at least 6 in Europe!

423
00:28:42,959 --> 00:28:44,084
They pay me scale,

424
00:28:44,123 --> 00:28:46,965
at least I would be in a big movie
and would give me the chance...

425
00:28:47,019 --> 00:28:49,340
And you have those
contacts with the Studio!

426
00:28:49,383 --> 00:28:50,513
What's going on here?

427
00:28:50,564 --> 00:28:53,434
<i>OK, wait a minute, you're not
seeing the big picture...</i>

428
00:28:53,490 --> 00:28:55,771
No, the big picture,
you're selling (the) package!

429
00:28:55,796 --> 00:28:57,974
<i>Yeah, but so does the
director involved,</i>

430
00:28:58,013 --> 00:29:00,786
<i>and the cinematographer involved.
What's the matter, do y...?</i>

431
00:29:00,816 --> 00:29:04,044
Jeff, how many years you
know me, 20 years? <i>- Sure.</i>

432
00:29:04,136 --> 00:29:06,764
Once in your life,
put me in a studio.

433
00:29:07,670 --> 00:29:09,308
<i>What are you
bullshitting me or what?</i>

434
00:29:09,342 --> 00:29:13,574
<i>Man, I've never done bad by you!
I've always done the right thing by you!</i>

435
00:29:13,606 --> 00:29:15,332
<i>And that's no bullshit.</i>

436
00:29:15,387 --> 00:29:18,587
<i>Look, you're an international
fucking movie star!</i>

437
00:29:18,744 --> 00:29:21,891
<i>Name me another
international movie star, huh?</i>

438
00:29:22,096 --> 00:29:25,029
<i>You work all the time,
you're well protected...</i>

439
00:29:28,756 --> 00:29:30,500
I lost my daughter.

440
00:29:32,530 --> 00:29:35,194
- I'm funny...
<i>- You're gonna get over that.</i>

441
00:29:35,405 --> 00:29:37,328
<i>Hey, remember Shakespeare:</i>

442
00:29:37,507 --> 00:29:40,478
<i>"Time and the hour
through the longest day...</i>

443
00:29:40,612 --> 00:29:42,447
<i>everything passes"</i>

444
00:29:43,377 --> 00:29:46,662
<i>You gotta believe me, here
man, life goes on.</i>

445
00:29:47,091 --> 00:29:48,882
<i>Especially in this town.</i>

446
00:29:49,049 --> 00:29:50,247
Stop it.

447
00:29:52,010 --> 00:29:53,291
Stop it.

448
00:29:57,161 --> 00:29:58,967
<i>You wanna smoke a joint?</i>

449
00:30:07,631 --> 00:30:09,936
<i>Jean-Claude, come on,
it was a joke!</i>

450
00:30:09,991 --> 00:30:12,163
<i>Hey! Look, can't you take a joke?</i>

451
00:30:12,173 --> 00:30:14,811
<i>Hey, don't forget, you start
shooting on November 10th.</i>

452
00:30:14,858 --> 00:30:17,631
<i>I love you, baby!
Keep that mojo working!</i>

453
00:30:29,724 --> 00:30:34,738
♪ <i>They say tomorrow is another day</i>

454
00:30:35,892 --> 00:30:40,224
♪ <i>well it's hard to say
till it's all gone.</i>

455
00:30:41,169 --> 00:30:47,867
♪ <i>It would be nice tonight
to send someone to play.</i>

456
00:30:49,357 --> 00:30:55,144
♪ <i>The song is nothing new
still the song is true.</i>

457
00:30:56,792 --> 00:31:02,525
♪ <i>Going down, down, down.</i>

458
00:31:03,130 --> 00:31:08,006
♪ <i>Going down, down, down.</i>

459
00:31:08,716 --> 00:31:13,619
♪ <i>Would the sound of a voice
take me higher?</i>

460
00:31:14,017 --> 00:31:19,158
♪ <i>Could the smile on his face
light my fire?</i>

461
00:31:19,341 --> 00:31:24,434
♪ <i>Could a hand in my hand
inspire me...?</i>

462
00:31:24,941 --> 00:31:26,182
Hello.

463
00:31:26,332 --> 00:31:28,273
<i>- Jean-Claude...
- Yeah?</i>

464
00:31:28,535 --> 00:31:30,776
The check you made bounced.

465
00:31:30,911 --> 00:31:33,740
<i>- What do you mean?</i>
- You know exactly what I mean.

466
00:31:33,785 --> 00:31:35,054
It's impossible!

467
00:31:35,138 --> 00:31:36,466
<i>Jean-Claude...</i>

468
00:31:36,780 --> 00:31:40,838
<i>If I don't get the money by noon,</i>
I'll have to drop the case.

469
00:31:41,411 --> 00:31:43,193
OK, don't drop the case.

470
00:31:43,661 --> 00:31:47,276
I promise you,
I'll get the money. OK? Thank you.

471
00:31:47,301 --> 00:31:50,163
<i>- You've been told.</i>
- Yes, at noon. OK, fine.

472
00:31:59,355 --> 00:32:02,615
♪ <i>I won't take all what
they hand me down</i>

473
00:32:02,950 --> 00:32:06,300
♪ <i>And make out a smile,
though I wear a frown</i>

474
00:32:06,513 --> 00:32:09,458
♪ <i>And I won't take it all lying down</i>

475
00:32:09,669 --> 00:32:13,105
♪ <i>'Cause once I get started I go to town</i>

476
00:32:13,379 --> 00:32:16,690
<i>♪ 'Cause I'm not like everybody else</i>
- Hey, M. Van Damme!

477
00:32:16,978 --> 00:32:19,403
M. Van Damme, I'm a great fan!

478
00:32:19,448 --> 00:32:21,017
- How are you?
- Fine and you? - Fine.

479
00:32:21,135 --> 00:32:24,002
- Why're you in Schaerbeek, lost?
- Going to the post office.

480
00:32:24,077 --> 00:32:26,262
A quick photo for
our Video Club? - OK.

481
00:32:26,329 --> 00:32:28,927
- Thanks. Look, it's Van Damme!
- Hello.

482
00:32:28,980 --> 00:32:31,512
Say hello later.
Take the photo first.

483
00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:41,304
Thanks guys.

484
00:32:41,387 --> 00:32:44,029
Wait, my grandma's crazy about you...

485
00:32:44,116 --> 00:32:46,200
In 5 minutes!

486
00:33:38,652 --> 00:33:41,322
Yeah... Van Damme.
How's it going?

487
00:33:42,146 --> 00:33:44,908
- Good evening.
- Can I get by? I have a...

488
00:33:45,647 --> 00:33:48,019
No, you can't, it's closed.

489
00:33:48,315 --> 00:33:49,394
- Closed?
- Yes.

490
00:33:49,604 --> 00:33:51,379
It's not yet six o'clock.

491
00:33:52,886 --> 00:33:57,417
It's very important.
I have a wire transfer, today, so...

492
00:33:57,499 --> 00:34:00,013
Yes, but we can't...

493
00:34:00,075 --> 00:34:01,537
This can't be possible!

494
00:34:01,599 --> 00:34:02,865
Computer's down.

495
00:34:02,925 --> 00:34:06,898
This can't be possible!
No, no, it's important, I...

496
00:34:07,046 --> 00:34:08,828
Tomorrow, if you'll...

497
00:34:08,963 --> 00:34:13,044
No, I need it today.
Look, it's very important.

498
00:34:13,228 --> 00:34:17,232
I need this money for my family.
You understand, family matters?

499
00:34:18,130 --> 00:34:19,990
Let me speak to the boss, OK?

500
00:34:20,037 --> 00:34:23,082
- OK, but quick.
- I'll be 2 minutes. Thanks.

501
00:34:38,086 --> 00:34:40,169
Hello, Madame, how do you do?

502
00:34:41,435 --> 00:34:43,396
I'm expecting a wire transfer.

503
00:34:43,529 --> 00:34:46,247
In the name of Jean-Claude
Van Varenberg.

504
00:34:46,320 --> 00:34:48,802
Not my stage name, Van Damme.

505
00:34:49,864 --> 00:34:52,699
I'm sorry, we have no cash today.

506
00:34:53,028 --> 00:34:54,968
I told you, M. Van Damme!

507
00:34:55,210 --> 00:34:58,866
No, you said it was a
technical problem, not liquidity.

508
00:34:58,944 --> 00:35:02,639
So, 'liquidity' or 'technical' glitch
which is it?

509
00:35:04,686 --> 00:35:07,809
Look, give me my dough.
Do something

510
00:35:08,145 --> 00:35:10,109
I need it, I have no money,

511
00:35:10,165 --> 00:35:12,996
my credit cards don't work.
Nothing works.

512
00:35:13,715 --> 00:35:15,579
We have no cash on hand.

513
00:35:16,415 --> 00:35:17,866
This is not possible!

514
00:35:17,937 --> 00:35:20,436
It's a bank!
It's what: 11 o'clock, noon?

515
00:35:20,475 --> 00:35:24,163
I need cash, I'm broke, I have no money
and my cards don't work!

516
00:35:24,214 --> 00:35:25,214
Let's go, sir.

517
00:35:25,242 --> 00:35:27,483
Wait, what's your first name?

518
00:35:28,603 --> 00:35:29,951
- Arthur.
- Listen...

519
00:35:30,035 --> 00:35:32,752
I haven't slept for
two days... jet lag.

520
00:35:32,791 --> 00:35:35,166
I have the Los Angeles
Court ruling,

521
00:35:35,228 --> 00:35:40,226
airplanes, toy stores, phone calls
to my mother, the taxi, tips...

522
00:35:41,092 --> 00:35:42,803
Wait, I have an idea.

523
00:35:42,915 --> 00:35:44,540
I have a solution.

524
00:35:45,052 --> 00:35:47,273
Take up a collection, perhaps, OK?

525
00:35:47,309 --> 00:35:50,568
I'm a good client of this bank.
I have a fair bit of dough.

526
00:35:50,607 --> 00:35:54,388
You could ask people to
put together $700, even 650...

527
00:35:54,450 --> 00:35:57,786
and tomorrow you take it
from my account, OK?

528
00:35:58,568 --> 00:36:00,027
I can't!

529
00:36:01,867 --> 00:36:03,793
You don't give a damn, huh?

530
00:36:03,837 --> 00:36:05,035
I can't!

531
00:36:08,271 --> 00:36:10,114
I want my dough!

532
00:36:11,537 --> 00:36:13,917
I'm fed up!
I want my cash!

533
00:36:14,183 --> 00:36:16,200
I've been fed up since yesterday!

534
00:36:16,255 --> 00:36:17,747
I have no cash on me.

535
00:36:17,794 --> 00:36:21,943
Jean-Claude Van Damme without cash?
Oh, I'll just get some. But nooo!

536
00:36:22,004 --> 00:36:24,346
I haven't slept,
I took a plane...

537
00:36:24,436 --> 00:36:27,307
I just came from... "child custody"!

538
00:36:28,647 --> 00:36:32,146
I can't... I'm burned out, guys.
Help me out.

539
00:36:32,200 --> 00:36:35,007
Between the taxi and the toys...
Help me out!

540
00:36:35,048 --> 00:36:38,169
- It can't be happening!
- That's enough, let's go.

541
00:36:38,677 --> 00:36:39,962
Go where?

542
00:36:44,081 --> 00:36:45,460
Camera?

543
00:36:45,799 --> 00:36:47,174
Camera.

544
00:36:47,839 --> 00:36:49,464
Oh, candid camera!

545
00:36:49,489 --> 00:36:51,897
Oh, sorry, guys, sorry!

546
00:36:51,977 --> 00:36:55,927
Look Madame, it's not my day.
I haven't slept for two days.

547
00:36:56,005 --> 00:36:59,020
Don't air this one,
it's not a good "take".

548
00:37:00,558 --> 00:37:02,058
Put him with the others!

549
00:37:02,131 --> 00:37:05,582
Are you nuts?
It's Jean-Claude Van Damme, dammit!

550
00:37:06,304 --> 00:37:08,463
<i>C'mon, get up!</i>

551
00:37:09,738 --> 00:37:12,228
Stand, I said! Quick!

552
00:37:12,536 --> 00:37:14,570
Faster! Move faster!

553
00:37:22,850 --> 00:37:24,927
Come sit, here.

554
00:37:29,282 --> 00:37:31,516
Ah, he sure messed you up!

555
00:37:31,547 --> 00:37:34,064
Breathe. Breathe, Jean-Claude.

556
00:37:38,148 --> 00:37:39,578
Oh là là!

557
00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:43,224
Wow! Look how you
developed your triceps!

558
00:37:43,544 --> 00:37:44,958
Don't worry about it.

559
00:37:45,020 --> 00:37:46,403
Watch out!

560
00:38:05,648 --> 00:38:07,535
Get up! Get up!

561
00:38:07,757 --> 00:38:09,748
The iron shutter!

562
00:38:10,326 --> 00:38:12,292
- What?
- The iron shutter!

563
00:38:12,889 --> 00:38:15,722
<i>Don't move! Shut up!
Lower your arms!</i>

564
00:38:18,891 --> 00:38:21,786
You shut up, too!
Arms down! Down!

565
00:38:24,386 --> 00:38:26,142
Gimme a hand!

566
00:38:26,686 --> 00:38:29,080
Gimme a hand! C'mon!

567
00:38:34,599 --> 00:38:36,151
What's going on?

568
00:38:36,296 --> 00:38:38,704
Don't stay there! Get away!

569
00:38:42,934 --> 00:38:44,132
<i>Open up!</i>

570
00:38:48,607 --> 00:38:50,157
<i>What's going on?</i>

571
00:38:52,277 --> 00:38:53,480
<i>Open up!</i>

572
00:38:54,589 --> 00:38:56,035
<i>Lower your eyes.</i>

573
00:38:56,107 --> 00:38:57,434
<i>You too, look down.</i>

574
00:38:58,455 --> 00:39:00,012
<i>What are you looking at?</i>

575
00:39:00,037 --> 00:39:01,532
<i>Look over there!</i>

576
00:39:04,265 --> 00:39:05,265
<i>Open up!</i>

577
00:39:38,497 --> 00:39:40,404
What are you doing?

578
00:39:59,318 --> 00:40:01,615
- Are you crazy?
- He tried to get in.

579
00:40:01,675 --> 00:40:04,793
How are we gonna get out now?
He'll call for back-up!

580
00:40:04,820 --> 00:40:07,197
Let him call whoever,
I'm not giving up!

581
00:40:07,230 --> 00:40:09,771
I didn't come to Belgium
to end up in jail!

582
00:40:09,796 --> 00:40:11,302
Watch out!

583
00:40:12,900 --> 00:40:14,720
Don't do it again Jean-Claude!

584
00:40:14,745 --> 00:40:17,302
I just wanted to see... that's all.

585
00:40:18,802 --> 00:40:21,732
- I almost fired Jean-Claude!
- OK, down!

586
00:40:25,035 --> 00:40:28,738
It's a Belgian Post Office, fuck,
it can't be that complicated!

587
00:40:28,791 --> 00:40:31,246
Oh fuck!
What do we do now?

588
00:40:31,885 --> 00:40:34,489
Leave now.
You have some time. Go!

589
00:40:35,682 --> 00:40:37,997
- Jean-Claude's right!
- Shut up!

590
00:40:38,864 --> 00:40:40,286
Turn yourselves in.

591
00:40:40,311 --> 00:40:44,061
Anyway, everybody saw the
gunshot was an accident, right?

592
00:40:44,108 --> 00:40:47,931
When I want you to teach me
to do the splits, I'll ring.

593
00:40:48,391 --> 00:40:49,560
Oh, bravo!

594
00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:51,179
Be sarcastic, insult me,

595
00:40:51,204 --> 00:40:53,677
beat up a hostage,
if it'll relax you,

596
00:40:53,702 --> 00:40:55,633
but I'm not turning myself in!

597
00:40:55,990 --> 00:40:57,700
We gotta block the exits.

598
00:40:58,402 --> 00:41:01,071
Keep an eye on them.
No more fucking up!

599
00:41:01,270 --> 00:41:04,115
<i>You say he entered by breaking in</i>

600
00:41:04,455 --> 00:41:06,091
<i>and the next sentence</i>

601
00:41:06,151 --> 00:41:07,768
you say he had a key!

602
00:41:07,829 --> 00:41:10,533
We gotta get this straight,
because,

603
00:41:10,923 --> 00:41:13,841
we're about to declare
a false accusation.

604
00:41:14,771 --> 00:41:16,419
You claim he was drunk,

605
00:41:16,462 --> 00:41:18,693
but I can't take that
as given, until

606
00:41:18,718 --> 00:41:21,044
his blood-alcohol level
has been checked.

607
00:41:21,192 --> 00:41:22,590
It's as simple as that.

608
00:41:22,630 --> 00:41:25,605
Boss, you'll never guess who's
robbing the post office!

609
00:41:25,630 --> 00:41:26,700
Who?

610
00:41:27,231 --> 00:41:30,556
I liked your speech.
Keeps pressure on the hostages.

611
00:41:30,646 --> 00:41:32,488
It wasn't for the hostages.

612
00:41:32,500 --> 00:41:35,305
You heard 'Karate Kid',
if we're cooperative...

613
00:41:35,342 --> 00:41:39,395
Listen, brainiac, who said there'd
be no risk robbing Belgian PO?

614
00:41:39,400 --> 00:41:41,547
That they're like
the Sisters of Mercy?

615
00:41:41,572 --> 00:41:44,003
That at worst we'd miss
the 12:43 train?

616
00:41:44,028 --> 00:41:45,085
That idiot...

617
00:41:45,100 --> 00:41:47,435
Is your pal, not mine.
Your responsibility!

618
00:41:47,493 --> 00:41:50,132
If you wanna continue
being the boss...

619
00:42:05,494 --> 00:42:08,800
Got it? You wanna be boss
and give orders?

620
00:42:08,805 --> 00:42:12,527
Grow some balls quick, or
I'll take things in hand.

621
00:42:12,567 --> 00:42:15,970
And I have no problem
getting them dirty. OK?

622
00:42:25,693 --> 00:42:27,037
No, no, no...

623
00:42:27,043 --> 00:42:28,500
Commissioner, please!

624
00:42:28,522 --> 00:42:30,900
I'm not Commissioner Please,
I'm Commissioner Bruges!

625
00:42:30,902 --> 00:42:33,185
They say it's Van Damme
can you confirm that?

626
00:42:33,230 --> 00:42:34,650
No comment for now.

627
00:42:34,675 --> 00:42:36,919
Shots were fired.
Is anybody injured?

628
00:42:38,164 --> 00:42:40,825
<i>How many hostages are there
Commissioner?</i>

629
00:42:43,677 --> 00:42:45,300
Let me do my job, now.

630
00:42:45,325 --> 00:42:46,372
<i>- What's your plan?</i>
- No!

631
00:42:46,397 --> 00:42:48,107
Please, keep clear!

632
00:42:52,599 --> 00:42:54,175
Careful with it.

633
00:42:56,183 --> 00:42:57,693
<i>Hey, easy!</i>

634
00:42:57,740 --> 00:43:00,838
<i>You know what that's worth
on eBay?</i>

635
00:43:09,158 --> 00:43:11,115
No, nothing's moving.

636
00:43:12,063 --> 00:43:13,747
He stopped whining?

637
00:43:14,506 --> 00:43:17,258
- He stopped whining!
- Don't get on my nerves.

638
00:43:21,023 --> 00:43:22,664
- Is that him?
- Yes.

639
00:43:23,130 --> 00:43:24,790
He dyed his hair.

640
00:43:40,146 --> 00:43:41,522
<i>He's in shock.</i>

641
00:43:42,482 --> 00:43:44,807
- What, Jean-Paul?
- He's still in shock.

642
00:43:45,158 --> 00:43:47,649
While I was shooting
the film "Hard Target",

643
00:43:47,820 --> 00:43:50,062
I took a blast from a blank.

644
00:43:50,125 --> 00:43:52,835
They had to reanimate me
with smelling salts.

645
00:43:52,884 --> 00:43:55,367
"Hard Target": John Woo!
- Yeah.

646
00:43:55,842 --> 00:43:57,926
- What an asshole!
- Don't say that!

647
00:43:57,997 --> 00:44:00,341
Woah, hold on, Jean-Claude!

648
00:44:00,395 --> 00:44:02,692
Jean-Claude brought him
to the States.

649
00:44:02,739 --> 00:44:06,819
Without him, he'd still be
filming pigeons in Hong Kong!

650
00:44:06,950 --> 00:44:09,540
When he makes it big...
He dumps you!

651
00:44:10,594 --> 00:44:12,661
At least, he did "Face Off".

652
00:44:12,747 --> 00:44:14,856
So? He could have cast you, no?

653
00:44:14,888 --> 00:44:16,083
Yeah. Yeah.

654
00:44:16,182 --> 00:44:18,750
But, Jean-Claude,
there is justice,

655
00:44:18,863 --> 00:44:21,328
after the way
"Windtalkers" flopped.

656
00:44:21,731 --> 00:44:23,412
Got any projects?

657
00:44:23,816 --> 00:44:25,226
Not at the moment.

658
00:44:25,401 --> 00:44:28,435
I saw a thing on the 'net,
what's it called?

659
00:44:28,649 --> 00:44:30,219
P... per... pler

660
00:44:30,446 --> 00:44:32,227
Purple.
"Purple Amulet".

661
00:44:32,274 --> 00:44:33,884
- Purple Amulet.
- Voilà.

662
00:44:34,116 --> 00:44:35,430
How's that going?

663
00:44:35,576 --> 00:44:37,918
- Steven Seagal got the role.
- Huh?

664
00:44:38,004 --> 00:44:40,538
- Steven Seagal got it.
- Steven Seagal?!

665
00:44:40,622 --> 00:44:42,629
You're a hundred times better!

666
00:44:44,943 --> 00:44:47,102
But, he cut off his 'ponytail'.

667
00:44:47,332 --> 00:44:48,750
Huh? His what?

668
00:44:48,824 --> 00:44:51,175
- His 'couette'.
- Couette?

669
00:44:51,418 --> 00:44:53,449
- 'Horse's tail'.
- I see.

670
00:44:53,678 --> 00:44:55,006
For the first time.

671
00:44:55,150 --> 00:44:57,775
Oh, yeah, that's tough.
I didn't know.

672
00:45:00,224 --> 00:45:02,927
What's with you?
What's the matter?

673
00:45:03,380 --> 00:45:05,698
- Me? - Yeah, you!
- Nothing. - What?

674
00:45:05,769 --> 00:45:07,306
- He coughed.
- No, Jean-Claude.

675
00:45:07,331 --> 00:45:09,698
- You trying to bother us?
- He just coughed.

676
00:45:09,794 --> 00:45:11,058
- He coughed.
- No, no...

677
00:45:11,083 --> 00:45:14,035
Do I amuse you? - No.
- Yes, I amuse you!

678
00:45:14,199 --> 00:45:15,609
No, no.

679
00:45:15,784 --> 00:45:18,136
- So, he makes you laugh?
- No.

680
00:45:18,229 --> 00:45:21,238
Oh, right, it's the
"aware" incident and all.

681
00:45:21,318 --> 00:45:23,365
- No. - Who are you?
- Drop it.

682
00:45:23,407 --> 00:45:26,513
No, wait, Jean-Claude.
Who do you think you are?

683
00:45:26,585 --> 00:45:29,982
What's with the sweatshirt?
Still wearing sweats at 40?

684
00:45:30,028 --> 00:45:32,450
- Yeah.
- Who do you think you are?

685
00:45:32,521 --> 00:45:35,630
- I...
- No, no, Shh!... OK?

686
00:45:36,052 --> 00:45:38,138
He's tired. Never mind.

687
00:45:38,263 --> 00:45:39,490
- He's tired?
- Yeah.

688
00:45:39,598 --> 00:45:42,224
I'm not tired, are you?
No, you're not.

689
00:45:42,293 --> 00:45:44,513
- No.
- So, shut your trap!

690
00:45:45,676 --> 00:45:47,419
OK?... Get up.

691
00:45:48,086 --> 00:45:49,693
Get up, quick!

692
00:45:53,026 --> 00:45:55,268
- Got a cigarette?
- I don't smoke.

693
00:45:56,708 --> 00:45:58,521
Anyone got a butt?

694
00:46:10,660 --> 00:46:12,583
<i>Hey, woah, woah!</i>

695
00:46:23,933 --> 00:46:26,305
- Well?
- It's ringing, but no answer.

696
00:46:26,586 --> 00:46:30,507
- No answer? - No.
- Don't need this, then.

697
00:46:30,554 --> 00:46:34,445
Get me a 'yell-a-phone'.
Like in the movies.

698
00:46:34,500 --> 00:46:37,068
To shout at them and
impress the crowd.

699
00:46:37,133 --> 00:46:39,215
<i>My shift started OK,
look how it ended!</i>

700
00:46:39,240 --> 00:46:42,740
I'm fed up with this,
I'm tired, I'm scared!

701
00:46:43,390 --> 00:46:45,413
- Can you stop...
- Who are you?

702
00:46:45,438 --> 00:46:46,769
I'm Commissioner Bruges.

703
00:46:46,803 --> 00:46:49,766
Oh, Commissioner,
I'm in a catastrophic state!

704
00:46:49,803 --> 00:46:51,291
May I remind you
there's a hold-up

705
00:46:51,316 --> 00:46:53,568
in progress at the Post Office.
Across the street...

706
00:46:53,635 --> 00:46:55,568
Yeah, a hold-up, but
did you see my taxi!

707
00:46:55,615 --> 00:46:58,802
Th-th-therefore as I said
we'll proceed step by step.

708
00:46:58,833 --> 00:47:00,699
- Step by step.
- Yeah, but look at my taxi!

709
00:47:00,724 --> 00:47:02,457
Right now you need to
answer some questions.

710
00:47:02,502 --> 00:47:05,685
I picked him up at the airport.
I've been doing this 30 years!

711
00:47:05,724 --> 00:47:08,345
You picked him up.
Did he have any baggage, madame?

712
00:47:09,388 --> 00:47:10,591
I can't, man!

713
00:47:10,646 --> 00:47:12,622
Just once, please!

714
00:47:13,160 --> 00:47:14,399
I don't want to.

715
00:47:15,621 --> 00:47:16,985
Open your mouth.

716
00:47:18,488 --> 00:47:20,746
Jean-Claude, do it for me,
just once!

717
00:47:20,801 --> 00:47:22,200
I haven't slept for 2 days.

718
00:47:22,231 --> 00:47:25,608
As a favor! This may be
the last time I see you.

719
00:47:25,674 --> 00:47:27,752
I wanna see that move,
just once, please.

720
00:47:27,806 --> 00:47:29,189
Jean-Claude, go on!

721
00:47:29,622 --> 00:47:32,888
Do it for me, please,
Jean-Claude! OK? Allez!

722
00:47:45,671 --> 00:47:48,623
Ho! You gotta applaud that, no?

723
00:47:53,823 --> 00:47:55,241
Great, Jean-Claude!

724
00:47:55,725 --> 00:47:58,881
Didn't I tell you he was the best?
Woah, where you going?

725
00:47:58,938 --> 00:48:01,592
- Did I tell you to move?
- No. - Back in your place.

726
00:48:01,617 --> 00:48:02,914
Yeah, quick!

727
00:48:04,441 --> 00:48:05,936
Where's my smoke?

728
00:48:10,572 --> 00:48:12,018
Open your mouth!

729
00:48:26,317 --> 00:48:27,692
Back a bit.

730
00:48:27,866 --> 00:48:29,253
And lower.

731
00:48:33,849 --> 00:48:35,364
- Jean-Claude?
- Yeah?

732
00:48:35,428 --> 00:48:37,693
- It's been a long time...
- Don't do it.

733
00:48:38,201 --> 00:48:39,512
Just once!

734
00:48:49,360 --> 00:48:52,973
<i>He bangs and says go, go, go!
So I took off.</i>

735
00:48:53,030 --> 00:48:55,775
- He said that?
<i>- He said that, Commissioner.</i>

736
00:48:55,806 --> 00:48:58,720
<i>I did as he asked;
big star, and all!</i>

737
00:49:03,827 --> 00:49:07,472
<i>- What the fuck did you do?</i>
- Fuck, I just fell! - <i>Fell, how?</i>

738
00:49:07,481 --> 00:49:10,186
What the fuck are you doing?
Get over here!

739
00:49:11,179 --> 00:49:14,146
- He needs a doctor.
- Are you a nurse? Sit down!

740
00:49:14,210 --> 00:49:15,987
<i>M. Van Damme!</i>

741
00:49:16,146 --> 00:49:17,899
<i>This is Commissioner </i>Bruges.

742
00:49:17,938 --> 00:49:20,556
Would you pick up the handset,

743
00:49:20,630 --> 00:49:22,611
so we can be in contact.

744
00:49:22,700 --> 00:49:24,524
No, is this a joke?

745
00:49:24,572 --> 00:49:25,919
No, no, Jean-Claude.

746
00:49:26,427 --> 00:49:28,640
They saw you move the cabinet.

747
00:49:28,700 --> 00:49:31,240
Moving a cabinet
equals heisting a bank?

748
00:49:31,245 --> 00:49:32,250
Shut up!

749
00:49:32,255 --> 00:49:35,940
<i>If you need anything,
pick up the phone.</i>

750
00:49:37,177 --> 00:49:39,482
I'm your personal contact...

751
00:49:40,429 --> 00:49:41,864
<i>Bruges.</i>

752
00:49:45,082 --> 00:49:46,909
That's our way outta here!

753
00:49:47,864 --> 00:49:50,800
Ah no, I got enough problems.
I have a trial...

754
00:49:50,815 --> 00:49:52,111
Shut up, I said!

755
00:49:55,431 --> 00:49:57,082
Go on, actor!

756
00:50:06,066 --> 00:50:08,346
You all right? Having fun?

757
00:50:11,710 --> 00:50:13,230
I don't believe this!

758
00:50:20,697 --> 00:50:22,775
Ze meuskl... Bruxelles...

759
00:50:23,329 --> 00:50:25,281
- You read English?
- Yes.

760
00:50:36,505 --> 00:50:39,990
<i>No tricks, or the dead
will be on your conscience.</i>

761
00:50:41,708 --> 00:50:44,380
- What do I say?
<i>- For now, let THEM say.</i>

762
00:50:45,090 --> 00:50:46,824
<i>He's at his daughter's
custody trial.</i>

763
00:50:46,888 --> 00:50:49,177
<i>- He picked up!
- He picked up!</i>

764
00:50:52,388 --> 00:50:53,591
Hello.

765
00:50:53,794 --> 00:50:55,771
- <i>M. Van Damme.</i>
- Hello.

766
00:50:57,450 --> 00:51:00,825
<i>Commissioner Bruges, here.
How are things in there?</i>

767
00:51:03,503 --> 00:51:05,244
Could be better.

768
00:51:05,896 --> 00:51:10,233
<i>OK, let's proceed in order of importance,
is anyone injured?</i>

769
00:51:12,536 --> 00:51:13,927
No, no, there's...

770
00:51:14,110 --> 00:51:16,908
an unconscious man
who's bleeding.

771
00:51:17,595 --> 00:51:20,779
<i>Fine, Jean-Claude.
May I call you Jean-Claude?</i>

772
00:51:20,841 --> 00:51:23,099
<i>I'm Commissioner Bruges,
Christian Bruges.</i>

773
00:51:23,139 --> 00:51:24,474
<i>Call me Christian.</i>

774
00:51:24,561 --> 00:51:27,892
<i>OK... Above all, you must
release the injured man.</i>

775
00:51:27,911 --> 00:51:31,556
<i>It's not in your interest, or mine
to have a cadaver on our hands.</i>

776
00:51:31,581 --> 00:51:33,138
<i>- Do you agree?</i>
- Yes.

777
00:51:33,208 --> 00:51:35,099
<i>Will you agree to release him?</i>

778
00:51:37,217 --> 00:51:40,171
No, no, nobody leaves.
It's impossible.

779
00:51:47,568 --> 00:51:49,959
What if I came there with a doctor?

780
00:51:50,162 --> 00:51:51,428
<i>Hello?</i>

781
00:51:51,553 --> 00:51:52,928
<i>Jean-Claude?</i>

782
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:57,332
With murder, it's no longer a heist,
it's a homicide rap.

783
00:51:57,355 --> 00:51:59,552
<i>Hello?... Jean-Claude?</i>

784
00:52:01,072 --> 00:52:03,492
<i>Hello? What if I came
with a doctor?</i>

785
00:52:03,549 --> 00:52:06,927
- OK, but unarmed.
<i>- You have my word, M. Van Damme.</i>

786
00:52:06,974 --> 00:52:08,583
Commissioner Bruges...

787
00:52:09,701 --> 00:52:11,540
I'll plug anyone who comes in that door.

788
00:52:11,550 --> 00:52:13,986
With murder, they won't
be as accomodating.

789
00:52:14,011 --> 00:52:15,495
Didn't you hear me?

790
00:52:16,299 --> 00:52:18,549
Well, they could come naked.

791
00:52:19,480 --> 00:52:23,142
In hostage films, the bad guys
get the good guys to come

792
00:52:23,205 --> 00:52:25,806
in the buff, to see if
they're unarmed.

793
00:52:26,036 --> 00:52:28,173
Does naked, suit you?

794
00:52:33,843 --> 00:52:35,851
Go ahead, tell them, yes.

795
00:52:36,976 --> 00:52:39,124
Un-der-pants!
[Clap, clap, clap]

796
00:52:40,594 --> 00:52:42,664
Un-der-pants!
[Clap, clap, clap]

797
00:52:58,712 --> 00:53:00,532
<i>Please, please...</i>

798
00:53:00,991 --> 00:53:02,687
Where's Petrucciani?

799
00:53:04,130 --> 00:53:05,857
{\an5}3. Stone falls on Egg,
.

800
00:53:05,882 --> 00:53:08,693
{\an5}3. Stone falls on Egg,
Egg breaks.

801
00:53:30,951 --> 00:53:34,545
Hey, Jean-Claude, excuse me!
Didn't recognize you!

802
00:53:35,990 --> 00:53:37,256
Woh!

803
00:53:39,942 --> 00:53:42,164
- Speak.
- Hey, Jeff, how are you?

804
00:53:42,255 --> 00:53:44,528
Hey, dawg!
What's up, dawg?

805
00:53:44,683 --> 00:53:46,903
Good, good, good...
Not so good.

806
00:53:46,971 --> 00:53:48,346
I need some money.

807
00:53:48,389 --> 00:53:50,240
Listen, can you advance, er...

808
00:53:50,316 --> 00:53:52,484
Can the producers
advance me some money?

809
00:53:52,525 --> 00:53:55,443
Listening Jean-Claude,
I was gonna call you...

810
00:53:55,509 --> 00:53:57,505
<i>right after your
vacation was over.</i>

811
00:53:57,564 --> 00:53:59,687
<i>They took somebody else.</i>

812
00:53:59,874 --> 00:54:00,954
Who?

813
00:54:01,344 --> 00:54:02,423
<i>Steven.</i>

814
00:54:02,632 --> 00:54:04,175
Steven?

815
00:54:04,871 --> 00:54:07,779
He promised to cut off his ponytail.
<i>Ugh...</i>

816
00:54:08,370 --> 00:54:10,122
<i>I know it hurts. I know it!</i>

817
00:54:10,185 --> 00:54:11,668
OK, OK, can you...

818
00:54:11,693 --> 00:54:14,576
Can I borrow some
money from you?

819
00:54:14,847 --> 00:54:16,804
<i>Hello? You're breaking up.</i>

820
00:54:16,969 --> 00:54:18,617
<i>- I'm losing ya!</i>
- Yeah.

821
00:54:18,906 --> 00:54:20,156
<i>- Hello?</i>
- Yeah.

822
00:54:20,206 --> 00:54:23,232
Hey, man, you're breaking
up here, I'm losing ya.

823
00:54:23,279 --> 00:54:25,648
You must be in a
tunnel or something!

824
00:54:25,690 --> 00:54:26,777
Cut the bullshit.

825
00:54:26,824 --> 00:54:28,982
Come on the phone. <i>Jeff!</i>

826
00:54:29,121 --> 00:54:31,604
- All right, yeah, yeah.
- What's next?

827
00:54:31,659 --> 00:54:33,950
<i>I got 'No Limit Injury'.</i>

828
00:54:34,044 --> 00:54:35,607
<i>It's about a Viet vet...</i>

829
00:54:35,684 --> 00:54:37,559
We've done this
movie 6 months ago.

830
00:54:37,606 --> 00:54:39,685
- We did?
<i>- What's next?</i>

831
00:54:39,785 --> 00:54:44,083
<i>'No Limit Injury 2'
It's about a Gulf War vet...</i>

832
00:54:44,331 --> 00:54:47,478
<i>who fights to pay
for his son's education.</i>

833
00:54:47,940 --> 00:54:49,354
<i>- Hello?</i>
- Hello, hello...

834
00:54:49,429 --> 00:54:51,671
- Is it good?
<i>- I dunno.</i>

835
00:54:52,546 --> 00:54:54,622
- Did you read it?
<i>- I dunno.</i>

836
00:54:56,115 --> 00:54:57,420
What the..

837
00:54:58,802 --> 00:55:00,036
OK, um...

838
00:55:00,735 --> 00:55:02,604
Call the producers...

839
00:55:03,133 --> 00:55:06,203
and, ah, tell them
I need some money up front.

840
00:55:06,291 --> 00:55:09,763
- Hey, man, I can't do that!
<i>- Just fucking do it, Jeff!</i>

841
00:55:14,485 --> 00:55:16,442
<i>Aren't you Jean-Claude
Van Damme?</i>

842
00:55:17,372 --> 00:55:20,278
You ARE Jean-Claude Van Damme,
my idol!

843
00:55:20,331 --> 00:55:21,637
Listen, um...

844
00:55:23,495 --> 00:55:25,618
I'm pretty tired and...

845
00:55:25,947 --> 00:55:29,132
<i>Don't start with the
'big star act' here, please.</i>

846
00:55:29,187 --> 00:55:32,260
<i>I'm having the event of...
the century!</i>

847
00:55:32,314 --> 00:55:34,445
<i>I can finally talk to you,</i>

848
00:55:34,531 --> 00:55:36,572
<i>and what do you do...?</i>

849
00:55:36,720 --> 00:55:38,048
<i>Let me talk to you.</i>

850
00:55:38,096 --> 00:55:40,048
<i>Rest, but let me talk.</i>

851
00:55:40,361 --> 00:55:42,532
<i>Close your eyes,
but let me talk.</i>

852
00:55:42,587 --> 00:55:43,587
OK

853
00:55:43,630 --> 00:55:46,583
<i>Anyway, when I see
you on the screen,</i>

854
00:55:46,717 --> 00:55:49,622
<i>You're different, I must say.
Really different!</i>

855
00:55:49,676 --> 00:55:50,646
Really?

856
00:55:50,700 --> 00:55:53,482
<i>You look better on
the screen, I tell you.</i>

857
00:55:53,560 --> 00:55:56,091
<i>And you're much nicer on-screen,</i>

858
00:55:56,139 --> 00:55:57,833
<i>I assure you...</i>

859
00:55:58,052 --> 00:56:01,151
- No, it's just...
<i>- Even though you're tired,</i>

860
00:56:01,544 --> 00:56:04,138
<i>- you're still better onscreen.</i>
- Oh yeah?

861
00:56:04,178 --> 00:56:06,943
<i>- You hurt my feelings, really.</i>
- Oh, come on!

862
00:56:07,019 --> 00:56:10,200
<i>I thought you'd be
a little nicer.</i>

863
00:56:10,347 --> 00:56:12,130
<i>All Belgium venerates you.</i>

864
00:56:12,172 --> 00:56:14,536
<i>You're THE great Belgian star!</i>

865
00:56:14,822 --> 00:56:17,313
<i>You represent us in Hollywood.</i>

866
00:56:17,517 --> 00:56:20,400
<i>So, just put up with
a chatty taxi driver!</i>

867
00:56:20,454 --> 00:56:22,414
- Yes. <i>- Please.</i>
- Excuse me.

868
00:56:22,504 --> 00:56:24,413
<i>Yeah, 'excuse me', sure!</i>

869
00:56:24,851 --> 00:56:26,588
<i>What's this nonsense?</i>

870
00:56:27,228 --> 00:56:29,611
<i>There's no need for this attitude!</i>

871
00:56:29,658 --> 00:56:32,658
Madame, are you doing
it on purpose, or what?

872
00:56:32,699 --> 00:56:34,032
<i>No, not at all!</i>

873
00:56:35,963 --> 00:56:37,599
Anyway, you're nice.

874
00:56:37,849 --> 00:56:40,177
<i>You too, but better
on the screen!</i>

875
00:56:40,255 --> 00:56:41,333
It's getting hot.

876
00:56:41,380 --> 00:56:43,818
<i>- Should I open a window?</i>
- No, I wanna sleep.

877
00:56:43,860 --> 00:56:45,958
<i>Then sleep and let me talk.</i>

878
00:56:46,005 --> 00:56:48,267
<i>All taxi drivers in
Brussels talk!</i>

879
00:56:48,337 --> 00:56:50,009
<i>You need to get used to it.</i>

880
00:56:50,056 --> 00:56:53,060
<i>If you often come to Bruxelles
you ought to know.</i>

881
00:56:53,940 --> 00:56:55,214
<i>(Seriously!)</i>

882
00:56:56,463 --> 00:56:59,323
<i>Star, star, star. What's that?</i>

883
00:57:00,060 --> 00:57:03,264
<i>I tell you, I didn't expect
such a response!</i>

884
00:57:03,581 --> 00:57:07,415
Look, Madame, I meant no harm...

885
00:57:07,516 --> 00:57:11,800
<i>Yeah, well you offended me.
You don't realize you're my idol!</i>

886
00:57:11,858 --> 00:57:14,605
- Excuse me.
<i>- I saw all your films.</i>

887
00:57:14,995 --> 00:57:18,372
<i>How can you possibly
answer me like that? How?</i>

888
00:57:18,428 --> 00:57:20,467
Excuse me, I'm tired...

889
00:57:21,592 --> 00:57:24,965
<i>- Anyway, you must take a photo with me!</i>
- Yes Madame.

890
00:57:25,028 --> 00:57:26,528
<i>- You promise?</i>
- Yes, madame.

891
00:57:26,562 --> 00:57:28,436
<i>- And you'll sign it?</i>
- Yes, madame.

892
00:57:28,461 --> 00:57:30,654
<i>- I'll give it to my son!</i>
- Yes, madame.

893
00:57:31,000 --> 00:57:34,318
Jean-Claude! Jean-Claude! Jean-Claude!

894
00:57:58,724 --> 00:58:02,598
<i>It's now, over 1½ hours since
actor, Jean-Claude Van Damme</i>

895
00:58:02,633 --> 00:58:06,216
took refuge inside a Post Office
in downtown Schaerbeek.

896
00:58:06,271 --> 00:58:07,716
<i>So far police have not...</i>

897
00:58:07,780 --> 00:58:09,294
She looks better on TV.

898
00:58:09,373 --> 00:58:11,021
<i>...his list of demands.</i>

899
00:58:11,067 --> 00:58:13,567
<i>We don't exactly know
what happened.</i>

900
00:58:13,632 --> 00:58:16,653
<i>After discharging a firearm several times,</i>

901
00:58:16,692 --> 00:58:18,407
<i>an anonymous source says...</i>

902
00:58:18,450 --> 00:58:20,739
So tell the source
to stay anonymous!

903
00:58:22,404 --> 00:58:25,358
Anyone who blabs,
will end up badly!

904
00:58:26,117 --> 00:58:27,417
Yes, M. Police Chief.

905
00:58:28,294 --> 00:58:30,021
I, I... Thank you, Chief.

906
00:58:30,138 --> 00:58:31,615
Call him back.

907
00:58:34,823 --> 00:58:38,224
No, no, he was there
and three people there.

908
00:58:38,744 --> 00:58:42,255
OK, the wire transfer's authorized
by the Prefect of Police.

909
00:58:42,330 --> 00:58:43,529
And the ransom?

910
00:58:43,790 --> 00:58:46,224
- We have to coax him with that.
- Bruges, I've seen...

911
00:58:46,293 --> 00:58:47,549
No assault!

912
00:58:48,306 --> 00:58:50,707
There's a kid inside,
I won't budge.

913
00:58:52,723 --> 00:58:54,049
<i>He picked up!</i>

914
00:58:55,744 --> 00:58:57,607
- Hello.
- Yes, Jean-Claude.

915
00:58:58,000 --> 00:59:00,579
I have good news.
The transfer's authorized.

916
00:59:00,606 --> 00:59:03,100
- Was it sent?
- It'll be sent when...

917
00:59:03,109 --> 00:59:06,974
you make a gesture.
Sorry, it cuts both ways

918
00:59:08,599 --> 00:59:09,724
And the money?

919
00:59:09,798 --> 00:59:11,513
Same thing for the money.

920
00:59:11,615 --> 00:59:13,599
It'll take a bit longer,
<i>Jean-Claude.</i>

921
00:59:13,615 --> 00:59:16,927
<i>You gotta make a gesture
from your end.</i> Give and take...

922
00:59:16,982 --> 00:59:18,450
<i>What do you want?</i>

923
00:59:18,601 --> 00:59:20,995
The kid. Let him go.

924
00:59:25,248 --> 00:59:26,682
I'll call you back.

925
00:59:27,993 --> 00:59:32,454
<i>The crowd's agitated. I think
something's going on over there.</i>

926
00:59:32,631 --> 00:59:33,686
What's the commotion?

927
00:59:33,756 --> 00:59:35,654
<i>It seems, despite the
crush of the crowd</i>

928
00:59:35,679 --> 00:59:37,874
<i>a car is attempting to get through.</i>

929
00:59:41,086 --> 00:59:42,758
- Who is it?
- What? - Who?

930
00:59:42,836 --> 00:59:44,610
- The Van Varenbergs.
- The who?

931
00:59:44,648 --> 00:59:47,789
- Van Damme's parents.
- Why don't you escort them?

932
00:59:51,024 --> 00:59:52,816
Please!

933
00:59:55,010 --> 00:59:56,753
<i>Mme Van Damme! Your son...</i>

934
00:59:57,990 --> 00:59:59,733
My son's a good man!

935
00:59:59,900 --> 01:00:01,114
No comment!

936
01:00:01,161 --> 01:00:04,966
What are you playing at?
Trying to screw me?

937
01:00:05,057 --> 01:00:08,013
- Are you nuts?
- Say you wanna screw me.

938
01:00:08,083 --> 01:00:10,247
- I'm not saying that.
- The kid stays.

939
01:00:10,502 --> 01:00:13,474
- They caved in.
- Shut up! He's our only protection.

940
01:00:13,521 --> 01:00:17,310
- Jean-Claude's right, they caved!
- Who's running this heist, him or us?

941
01:00:17,341 --> 01:00:19,980
They caved to his demand, not ours.
No hostage leaves!

942
01:00:20,050 --> 01:00:21,935
- Hey Jen-Claude.
- I said, get back!

943
01:00:22,013 --> 01:00:24,130
Go back and don't move!
I told you twice.

944
01:00:24,193 --> 01:00:26,552
- Watch your tone.
- I speak as I please. Get on back!

945
01:00:26,599 --> 01:00:27,732
Shut up, you hear me?

946
01:00:27,778 --> 01:00:29,578
- Get back! - Lower your gun.
- Calm down!

947
01:00:29,661 --> 01:00:31,974
- Get back!
- Lower your gun, first.

948
01:00:32,186 --> 01:00:34,607
- Go back there.
- Shut up and lower your gun.

949
01:00:34,677 --> 01:00:36,476
- Go back.
- Now, I'll go.

950
01:00:36,518 --> 01:00:38,357
They'll break off negotiations.

951
01:00:39,271 --> 01:00:41,333
And I'll break off your neck.

952
01:00:43,444 --> 01:00:47,472
If not the kid, then release
another hostage, in good faith.

953
01:00:47,497 --> 01:00:49,652
Just don't shoot, don't shoot.

954
01:00:50,292 --> 01:00:51,482
Don't shoot.

955
01:00:52,350 --> 01:00:53,548
Stop.

956
01:00:54,122 --> 01:00:55,380
He's right.

957
01:00:57,372 --> 01:00:59,669
If we release one, he'll talk.

958
01:01:00,137 --> 01:01:02,099
Not the one I'm thinking of.

959
01:01:18,435 --> 01:01:21,419
<i>Police are forcing back
their barricades</i>

960
01:01:21,612 --> 01:01:24,145
<i>as street protesters press on.</i>

961
01:01:43,983 --> 01:01:45,755
<i>Tell them we'll release one.</i>

962
01:01:45,799 --> 01:01:50,144
- Your psycho son wounded a...
- Don't call him psycho!

963
01:01:50,519 --> 01:01:52,404
He's called Jean-Claude.

964
01:01:52,540 --> 01:01:54,165
He's called Camille.

965
01:01:54,554 --> 01:01:55,964
He's called François.

966
01:01:56,099 --> 01:01:58,880
He's called Van Damme
or Van Varenberg!

967
01:01:59,139 --> 01:02:01,913
But he's not called 'psycho'!

968
01:02:05,855 --> 01:02:07,152
Get out.

969
01:02:08,325 --> 01:02:09,497
Go.

970
01:02:10,645 --> 01:02:12,474
He's on the phone, boss.

971
01:02:15,638 --> 01:02:17,724
Gotta do something for the kid.

972
01:02:19,708 --> 01:02:23,404
I need you to help us convince
your son to let him go.

973
01:02:28,756 --> 01:02:30,045
Jean-Claude?

974
01:02:30,528 --> 01:02:33,029
<i>OK we release a hostage,
but not the kid.</i>

975
01:02:35,505 --> 01:02:38,270
There's someone who
wants to talk to you.

976
01:02:42,168 --> 01:02:44,122
Hello... Dear?

977
01:02:46,145 --> 01:02:47,481
Mama?

978
01:02:49,920 --> 01:02:52,539
What are you doing, son?

979
01:02:53,449 --> 01:02:54,786
Nothing, I'm....

980
01:02:55,169 --> 01:02:56,549
Nothing!

981
01:02:57,398 --> 01:02:59,590
<i>Please talk to me, cheri.</i>

982
01:03:00,795 --> 01:03:02,213
It's nothing, ma.

983
01:03:03,330 --> 01:03:05,971
<i>Mama, lemme speak
to that assfucker!</i>

984
01:03:06,916 --> 01:03:09,659
<i>Get my lawyer on the phone, now.</i>

985
01:03:09,863 --> 01:03:12,263
Tell them I'm
releasing a hostage.

986
01:03:12,293 --> 01:03:13,802
Don't cry, Ma.

987
01:03:18,063 --> 01:03:19,442
Don't!

988
01:03:20,553 --> 01:03:22,350
Ok, ok, OK!

989
01:03:24,299 --> 01:03:25,668
Take them away.

990
01:03:34,935 --> 01:03:36,605
It was my mother.

991
01:03:37,506 --> 01:03:39,987
I don't give a fuck
about your mother.

992
01:03:40,951 --> 01:03:42,943
Wanna hear about mine?

993
01:03:43,381 --> 01:03:45,829
- Last time I saw her was...
- What?

994
01:03:46,135 --> 01:03:48,025
At my birth.

995
01:03:49,600 --> 01:03:53,919
First he tries to screw me,
now he wants to make me bawl.

996
01:03:53,927 --> 01:03:55,358
You come with me.

997
01:03:56,298 --> 01:03:58,586
- Why?
- 'Cause you're getting out.

998
01:04:00,481 --> 01:04:01,607
Let's go, dear.

999
01:04:01,668 --> 01:04:03,460
No, he stays here.

1000
01:04:03,520 --> 01:04:04,520
Come on.

1001
01:04:04,586 --> 01:04:07,923
Do the wire transfer
and get me his lawyer.

1002
01:04:11,589 --> 01:04:13,249
Rule number 1:

1003
01:04:13,514 --> 01:04:16,954
It's the 'psycho' who must
prove his good faith.

1004
01:04:17,981 --> 01:04:19,262
C'mon.

1005
01:04:22,327 --> 01:04:23,357
Hm?

1006
01:04:28,192 --> 01:04:29,841
- Leave him.
- Why do I have to go?

1007
01:04:29,908 --> 01:04:31,294
Come with me.

1008
01:04:31,489 --> 01:04:33,481
Why do you want to keep him?

1009
01:04:33,608 --> 01:04:36,255
He stays here. You come
with me. - No, no...

1010
01:04:36,326 --> 01:04:37,381
Let him go.

1011
01:04:37,810 --> 01:04:39,098
Not without me.

1012
01:04:39,600 --> 01:04:42,435
<i>Not without my son!</i>

1013
01:04:55,736 --> 01:04:56,745
Hello?

1014
01:04:56,795 --> 01:04:59,150
<i>Boss? Lawyer's on the line.</i>

1015
01:05:03,309 --> 01:05:04,862
Hi, Sir.

1016
01:05:05,295 --> 01:05:07,365
M-Mister... Master...

1017
01:05:08,219 --> 01:05:09,474
<i>One moment...</i>

1018
01:05:10,411 --> 01:05:11,880
Mr. Bernstein,

1019
01:05:12,239 --> 01:05:15,678
We need you to talk the voice
<i>of reason to your client.</i>

1020
01:05:15,740 --> 01:05:16,928
Get him on the phone.

1021
01:05:16,977 --> 01:05:18,352
Come on, get up!

1022
01:05:19,922 --> 01:05:21,170
Let me go!

1023
01:05:23,785 --> 01:05:27,990
- You're lucky, you got a gun.
- You got lucky, too.

1024
01:05:29,227 --> 01:05:30,887
Really.

1025
01:05:36,624 --> 01:05:38,992
Let me go!
Let me go!

1026
01:05:42,428 --> 01:05:43,655
Let me go!

1027
01:05:43,699 --> 01:05:46,825
Damien, I'll be back!
<i>Mommy's coming back!</i>

1028
01:05:50,082 --> 01:05:52,341
<i>- Move!
- Damien... noo!</i>

1029
01:05:58,254 --> 01:05:59,896
Move! Get up!

1030
01:06:00,005 --> 01:06:01,107
Up! Up!

1031
01:06:01,242 --> 01:06:03,224
When I say get up, you get up!

1032
01:06:03,411 --> 01:06:05,856
You, one wrong word
and you're dead!

1033
01:06:05,923 --> 01:06:06,929
<i>Hello?</i>

1034
01:06:06,981 --> 01:06:09,718
<i>Jean-Claude, what the hell
is wrong with you?</i>

1035
01:06:09,757 --> 01:06:11,107
<i>Did you get the money?</i>

1036
01:06:11,146 --> 01:06:13,365
Yeah, of course, but,
what the fuck?

1037
01:06:13,420 --> 01:06:15,663
<i>OK then, do your job!</i>

1038
01:06:18,075 --> 01:06:21,700
If you open your mouth,
you'll get your kid back in pieces.

1039
01:06:21,745 --> 01:06:22,825
Got it?

1040
01:06:23,522 --> 01:06:24,965
I'll take care of him.

1041
01:06:26,578 --> 01:06:27,974
<i>Take care of him?</i>

1042
01:06:28,043 --> 01:06:30,645
<i>You can't even take
care of your own kid!</i>

1043
01:06:30,694 --> 01:06:31,803
It's all your fault!

1044
01:06:31,844 --> 01:06:34,537
<i>They're opening the iron shutter!</i>

1045
01:06:39,529 --> 01:06:41,951
[JEAN! CLAUDE! JEAN! CLAUDE!]

1046
01:06:42,856 --> 01:06:44,263
Allez, go!

1047
01:06:46,021 --> 01:06:49,044
[JEAN! CLAUDE! JEAN! CLAUDE!...]

1048
01:07:10,495 --> 01:07:12,072
- Move back.
- Nooo!

1049
01:07:13,175 --> 01:07:15,757
Move back, madame.
Back!

1050
01:07:34,684 --> 01:07:35,989
Over there.

1051
01:07:37,954 --> 01:07:39,828
Over there, I said.

1052
01:07:43,834 --> 01:07:45,494
<i>So we put it all in boxes.</i>

1053
01:07:45,676 --> 01:07:48,298
<i>I think I'll keep
one Christmas bulb.</i>

1054
01:07:48,487 --> 01:07:51,341
<i>That's the one, I adore
It's a little beauty.</i>

1055
01:07:51,521 --> 01:07:56,051
<i>It's a way to remember Carnival
the next feast, is not too far off.</i>

1056
01:07:56,221 --> 01:08:00,449
<i>No, it's not. We had a similar idea.
I kept a heart from my Chrismas tree.</i>

1057
01:08:00,602 --> 01:08:03,789
<i>To keep in mind that soon
it'll be St. Valentine's</i>

1058
01:08:03,814 --> 01:08:06,086
<i>the feast of lovers.
Vive l'amour!</i>

1059
01:08:06,180 --> 01:08:10,294
<i>How romantic, our Dimitri is!
Today is our 1,500th show!</i>

1060
01:08:15,947 --> 01:08:17,487
Voila.

1061
01:08:18,688 --> 01:08:20,778
This film's for me.

1062
01:08:21,077 --> 01:08:22,315
Yeah.

1063
01:08:22,672 --> 01:08:24,546
Here we are, you and me.

1064
01:08:32,663 --> 01:08:34,572
Why did you do that?

1065
01:08:35,137 --> 01:08:37,568
Or, why did I do that?

1066
01:08:38,809 --> 01:08:40,693
You gave me my dream.

1067
01:08:40,898 --> 01:08:42,591
I asked for it...

1068
01:08:42,832 --> 01:08:45,378
and I promised you
something in exchange.

1069
01:08:45,473 --> 01:08:47,295
But I haven't yet delivered.

1070
01:08:49,010 --> 01:08:52,094
You won, I lost.

1071
01:08:54,532 --> 01:08:56,240
Unless...

1072
01:08:56,589 --> 01:08:58,903
the path you've set for me,

1073
01:08:58,995 --> 01:09:01,900
is a path made of pitfalls,

1074
01:09:01,981 --> 01:09:05,646
where the answer
comes before the question.

1075
01:09:05,716 --> 01:09:08,658
Ah! Yes, I do that.

1076
01:09:09,543 --> 01:09:11,990
Now I understand why I do it.

1077
01:09:12,225 --> 01:09:15,934
This is the cure,
of what I've seen there.

1078
01:09:16,690 --> 01:09:18,729
It's mathematical.

1079
01:09:19,261 --> 01:09:23,035
It makes a lot of sense
for people who understand.

1080
01:09:24,975 --> 01:09:26,933
So, America,

1081
01:09:28,292 --> 01:09:29,922
poverty,

1082
01:09:30,648 --> 01:09:32,860
stealing to eat...

1083
01:09:33,536 --> 01:09:37,949
chasing producers, actors,
movie stars,

1084
01:09:38,427 --> 01:09:41,865
going to night clubs
hoping to see a star,

1085
01:09:41,951 --> 01:09:45,154
with my karate photos,
in karate magazines.

1086
01:09:45,329 --> 01:09:48,283
It's all I had.
I didn't speak English.

1087
01:09:50,681 --> 01:09:53,383
But I'd trained for 20 years
in karate.

1088
01:09:53,533 --> 01:09:56,400
'Cause I didn't used to be
like this... This!

1089
01:09:56,548 --> 01:09:58,591
This is me, today.

1090
01:09:58,925 --> 01:10:02,216
Before I was skinny, small, puny.

1091
01:10:02,722 --> 01:10:06,091
And I took up karate.
For the Dojo; respect,

1092
01:10:06,182 --> 01:10:09,598
you believe people who say,

1093
01:10:10,200 --> 01:10:12,474
Osu!
(Kick ass! But respectfully)

1094
01:10:12,647 --> 01:10:14,106
It's Samurai.

1095
01:10:14,623 --> 01:10:16,545
It's straight, it's not falsehood.

1096
01:10:16,614 --> 01:10:18,772
So that guy in America...

1097
01:10:19,131 --> 01:10:20,939
is not the same.

1098
01:10:21,281 --> 01:10:23,488
No one says to you: "Osu"

1099
01:10:23,659 --> 01:10:27,360
The say, sometimes
in show business:

1100
01:10:28,302 --> 01:10:29,880
"We're gonna fuck him."

1101
01:10:31,124 --> 01:10:34,153
And I believed people,
I believed the Dojo.

1102
01:10:34,628 --> 01:10:38,583
And I was harmed
and I had a lot of "wives".

1103
01:10:39,163 --> 01:10:41,302
I always believed in love.

1104
01:10:41,635 --> 01:10:45,564
It's hard for a woman
with three kids to say,

1105
01:10:45,666 --> 01:10:47,703
which one I love more.

1106
01:10:47,949 --> 01:10:49,609
A mother...

1107
01:10:50,184 --> 01:10:53,719
If you have 5, 6, 7
10 women in your life,

1108
01:10:54,313 --> 01:10:57,018
they each have
something special,

1109
01:10:57,143 --> 01:10:59,286
but people don't give a damn
about that,

1110
01:10:59,351 --> 01:11:02,602
in the 'sort-of' media.

1111
01:11:05,032 --> 01:11:06,526
Drugs.

1112
01:11:07,201 --> 01:11:10,621
When you got it all;
when you've travelled the world;

1113
01:11:10,913 --> 01:11:12,676
when you've been in
all the hotels;

1114
01:11:12,707 --> 01:11:15,857
when you're the prima
donna of the 'pentuss'...

1115
01:11:15,901 --> 01:11:17,355
Penthouse.

1116
01:11:17,921 --> 01:11:21,364
Each hotel in each world over...
travels...

1117
01:11:21,578 --> 01:11:24,771
you want something extra.

1118
01:11:25,469 --> 01:11:27,489
And because of a woman...

1119
01:11:27,638 --> 01:11:29,839
because that's what love is,

1120
01:11:30,005 --> 01:11:32,894
I try something and get hooked.

1121
01:11:34,595 --> 01:11:37,511
Van Damme, 'The Beast',

1122
01:11:38,148 --> 01:11:39,975
the 'Tiger of the Cage',

1123
01:11:40,111 --> 01:11:43,060
'Bloodsport-man' is hooked.

1124
01:11:43,997 --> 01:11:47,628
I was wrecked, mentally, physically,

1125
01:11:48,534 --> 01:11:52,068
to the point that
I got out of it.

1126
01:11:56,184 --> 01:11:57,975
I got out.

1127
01:11:59,343 --> 01:12:00,458
But...

1128
01:12:01,259 --> 01:12:03,216
all that is there.

1129
01:12:04,749 --> 01:12:06,576
It's all there.

1130
01:12:08,766 --> 01:12:10,759
The things I went through!

1131
01:12:13,085 --> 01:12:15,705
I saw people poorer than me.

1132
01:12:16,261 --> 01:12:21,066
I went from poor to rich and thought,
why aren't we all like that; like me.

1133
01:12:21,115 --> 01:12:22,783
Why privilege?

1134
01:12:23,044 --> 01:12:25,044
I'm a guy like any other.

1135
01:12:25,161 --> 01:12:27,622
It makes me sick to
see people...

1136
01:12:28,740 --> 01:12:30,732
who don't have what I have.

1137
01:12:30,832 --> 01:12:33,668
Knowing they don't have...
what I have.

1138
01:12:33,746 --> 01:12:36,272
Also knowing their qualities are...

1139
01:12:36,366 --> 01:12:39,490
much more... ENORMOUSLY more... than mine!

1140
01:12:39,576 --> 01:12:42,685
It's not my fault
if I was hardwired to be a star.

1141
01:12:42,747 --> 01:12:44,347
I asked for it.

1142
01:12:44,417 --> 01:12:46,722
I asked for it,
with fervent belief.

1143
01:12:46,766 --> 01:12:49,518
When you're 13,
you believe in dreams.

1144
01:12:49,589 --> 01:12:53,945
Well, it came true.
But me, to this very day,

1145
01:12:54,505 --> 01:12:56,872
what have I done for this Earth?

1146
01:12:57,643 --> 01:12:58,924
NOTHING!

1147
01:12:59,625 --> 01:13:01,167
I've done nothing!

1148
01:13:03,908 --> 01:13:07,187
And now I might die
in this post office,

1149
01:13:09,258 --> 01:13:12,718
hoping for a new start
here in Belgium,

1150
01:13:13,329 --> 01:13:16,283
in my country, among my roots.

1151
01:13:17,147 --> 01:13:21,031
Start again with my parents
and recover my health.

1152
01:13:22,186 --> 01:13:24,950
To regain my life.
So I hope...

1153
01:13:25,339 --> 01:13:26,918
that in this post office,

1154
01:13:26,969 --> 01:13:29,794
no idiot is gonna
pull the trigger.

1155
01:13:30,880 --> 01:13:34,629
It's stupid to kill people.
They're so beautiful!

1156
01:13:35,856 --> 01:13:38,747
I'm praying for that, God.
Today.

1157
01:13:41,009 --> 01:13:42,634
I believe it...

1158
01:13:43,420 --> 01:13:45,212
it's not a film.

1159
01:13:45,536 --> 01:13:47,247
It's reality.

1160
01:13:49,577 --> 01:13:50,849
Reality.

1161
01:13:56,333 --> 01:13:57,970
I've seen things.

1162
01:13:59,965 --> 01:14:01,791
I was born in Belgium,

1163
01:14:02,133 --> 01:14:04,415
but I'm a son of the Earth.

1164
01:14:04,719 --> 01:14:06,689
I travelled a lot.

1165
01:14:07,472 --> 01:14:10,473
It's very difficult for me
to judge people.

1166
01:14:10,883 --> 01:14:13,771
And it's been very
difficult for people...

1167
01:14:16,081 --> 01:14:18,333
to keep from judging me,

1168
01:14:18,977 --> 01:14:21,154
but rather, accuse me.

1169
01:14:22,930 --> 01:14:25,341
Yeah, something like that.

1170
01:14:32,524 --> 01:14:35,508
<i>To keep in mind that soon
it'll be St. Valentine's</i>

1171
01:14:35,524 --> 01:14:37,508
<i>the feast of lovers.
Vive l'amour!</i>

1172
01:14:37,524 --> 01:14:39,038
<i>How romantic our Dimitri is!</i>

1173
01:14:39,134 --> 01:14:41,162
<i>Today is our 1,500th show!</i>

1174
01:14:41,283 --> 01:14:43,988
<i>Absolutely, and I'm
giving away rare items</i>

1175
01:14:44,184 --> 01:14:47,705
<i>like the red wig that
Véronique et Sébastien never wore;</i>

1176
01:14:47,762 --> 01:14:49,135
<i>we don't know why;</i>

1177
01:14:49,180 --> 01:14:52,471
<i>along with a hat full of ideas
for reportages.</i>

1178
01:14:52,557 --> 01:14:53,869
<i>A lovely day with Jean...</i>

1179
01:14:54,133 --> 01:14:56,339
Say, Arthur?

1180
01:14:57,922 --> 01:15:00,427
- That's your name, Arthur?
- Yeah.

1181
01:15:03,219 --> 01:15:05,537
The hostages gotta be freed.

1182
01:15:06,514 --> 01:15:08,358
No, I can't, Jean-Claude.

1183
01:15:08,408 --> 01:15:10,999
Sure, you can. It's easy.

1184
01:15:12,260 --> 01:15:13,802
We go down there,

1185
01:15:13,978 --> 01:15:16,055
open the iron shutter,

1186
01:15:16,678 --> 01:15:18,052
and split!

1187
01:15:20,110 --> 01:15:22,712
{\an5}4. Egg falls on Stone,
Egg breaks.

1188
01:15:22,713 --> 01:15:24,857
<i>Really?! It's OK by you?</i>

1189
01:15:24,872 --> 01:15:27,623
How long can we hold out
with 7 hostages left?

1190
01:15:27,648 --> 01:15:28,661
No Wait.

1191
01:15:28,716 --> 01:15:31,138
Wait for what?
Go on, what's the plan?

1192
01:15:31,192 --> 01:15:33,224
Your plan, after the
cops question her.

1193
01:15:33,290 --> 01:15:35,774
- They wait for the dough.
- After...

1194
01:15:35,813 --> 01:15:37,853
Huh, what dough?

1195
01:15:37,878 --> 01:15:40,665
<i>You're waiting for them
to count out a million?!</i>

1196
01:15:40,839 --> 01:15:44,374
<i>You crazy! What's a million?
I won't calm down.</i>

1197
01:15:44,497 --> 01:15:47,228
How you gonna get us out?
She'll blab.

1198
01:15:47,282 --> 01:15:48,860
<i>She won't, we've got her kid.</i>

1199
01:15:48,889 --> 01:15:51,496
I'm telling you,
next one to leave dies, OK?

1200
01:15:51,536 --> 01:15:53,934
- <i>You can't waste them.</i>
- I'll waste anyone.

1201
01:15:53,973 --> 01:15:57,481
<i>No more negotiating, only killing!
Next one out is dead.</i>

1202
01:15:57,543 --> 01:15:59,458
<i>Be it hostage, or whatever!</i>

1203
01:15:59,716 --> 01:16:00,925
<i>You got that?</i>

1204
01:16:00,960 --> 01:16:04,489
<i>We negotiate better that way
from a position of strength.</i>

1205
01:16:04,732 --> 01:16:06,583
<i>Oh! What are you doing?</i>

1206
01:16:07,740 --> 01:16:10,065
What? Wanna hold it for me?

1207
01:16:10,730 --> 01:16:12,277
<i>Let's wait until the bus...</i>

1208
01:16:12,328 --> 01:16:15,957
Stop, stop! What bus?
Leave by bus, now? Are you nuts?

1209
01:16:16,027 --> 01:16:18,832
Why not the subway,
while you're at it!

1210
01:16:18,904 --> 01:16:19,967
Hey, you!

1211
01:16:20,058 --> 01:16:22,893
Going back for seconds or what?

1212
01:16:23,917 --> 01:16:25,146
I'm pissing.

1213
01:16:25,225 --> 01:16:26,700
- Pissing?
- Yeah!

1214
01:16:26,982 --> 01:16:28,474
Why are you pissing silently?

1215
01:16:28,511 --> 01:16:29,962
Yeah, why, do you make noise?

1216
01:16:30,017 --> 01:16:31,532
- You piss white?
- Yeah!

1217
01:16:31,590 --> 01:16:34,298
Your piss is invisible!
Take me for an idiot?

1218
01:16:34,353 --> 01:16:35,847
Are you sick?

1219
01:16:36,221 --> 01:16:38,522
Do you piss a sickly yellow?
Red?

1220
01:16:38,593 --> 01:16:40,646
There's color.
You can see it at least.

1221
01:16:40,709 --> 01:16:42,343
- You're sick.
- So, I'm sick? - Yeah.

1222
01:16:42,415 --> 01:16:43,976
- I'm sick?
- Sure.

1223
01:16:46,946 --> 01:16:49,381
<i>Wait, I'm going
back to my post...</i>

1224
01:16:51,466 --> 01:16:53,484
<i>Fuck! Where are they?</i>

1225
01:17:05,130 --> 01:17:08,047
<i>Back in the room, faster!</i>

1226
01:17:17,392 --> 01:17:20,786
<i>Let her through, she's the mother!
It's her son!</i>

1227
01:17:32,628 --> 01:17:34,005
<i>Move back.</i>

1228
01:17:37,480 --> 01:17:38,974
<i>What do you want?</i>

1229
01:17:39,165 --> 01:17:41,703
<i>Still trying to screw me, huh?</i>

1230
01:17:41,963 --> 01:17:43,861
<i>I was helping...</i>

1231
01:17:44,009 --> 01:17:45,287
<i>Get back!</i>

1232
01:17:46,597 --> 01:17:48,554
<i>Get back, I said, !</i>

1233
01:17:48,841 --> 01:17:51,754
- Don't shoot.
<i>- Get back. Back.</i>

1234
01:17:51,895 --> 01:17:53,754
Don't shoot, man!

1235
01:17:56,785 --> 01:17:59,693
- What are you doing?
- Gonna shoot me, now?

1236
01:17:59,732 --> 01:18:02,005
What am I playing at?
What are YOU?

1237
01:18:02,106 --> 01:18:04,361
<i>- Whose side are you on?
- You're panicking!</i>

1238
01:18:04,395 --> 01:18:07,496
<i>- Whose side, huh?
- Shut up, don't piss me off!</i>

1239
01:18:08,364 --> 01:18:10,513
Oh, woah! Let go!

1240
01:18:17,204 --> 01:18:20,533
[WE WANT INFO! WE WANT INFO!]

1241
01:18:20,831 --> 01:18:23,037
<i>Get the fuck out, I'm telling you!</i>

1242
01:18:23,280 --> 01:18:24,857
<i>Motherfucker!</i>

1243
01:18:25,462 --> 01:18:26,462
<i>Let go.</i>

1244
01:18:30,644 --> 01:18:31,644
<i>Sir!</i>

1245
01:18:31,677 --> 01:18:34,169
<i>My son, Jean-Claude...</i>

1246
01:18:34,443 --> 01:18:37,642
- What's going on?
- Is Jean-Claude dead or...

1247
01:18:38,424 --> 01:18:41,347
Answer me!
Dammit, he's my son!

1248
01:18:41,442 --> 01:18:44,589
Shut her up! Stop her yelling!

1249
01:18:44,699 --> 01:18:46,377
Leggo, I said!

1250
01:18:46,674 --> 01:18:48,096
Leggo!

1251
01:18:55,713 --> 01:18:57,290
What?

1252
01:18:57,677 --> 01:18:59,825
Go on, shoot! Shoot.

1253
01:19:00,340 --> 01:19:02,499
You too, get lost!

1254
01:19:05,875 --> 01:19:08,709
<i>Back to our correspondent
in Los Angeles...</i>

1255
01:19:08,740 --> 01:19:09,748
Hello?

1256
01:19:09,773 --> 01:19:14,396
<i>It seems Van Damme's
attorneys have a statement to make.</i>

1257
01:19:14,634 --> 01:19:18,458
<i>We represented Mr. Van Damme
for over fifteen years,</i>

1258
01:19:18,509 --> 01:19:22,240
<i>which is a lot of time, a lot of
business, a lot of friendship, so...</i>

1259
01:19:22,308 --> 01:19:24,306
<i>It's with the
greatest regret that</i>

1260
01:19:24,401 --> 01:19:27,435
<i>I had to prepare the
statement with my colleagues</i>

1261
01:19:27,498 --> 01:19:30,535
"Because of M. Van Damme's behavior
and for ethical purposes,

1262
01:19:30,577 --> 01:19:32,321
my firm and myself hereby,

1263
01:19:32,382 --> 01:19:35,504
<i>immediately cease to represent
Jean Claude Van Damme."</i>

1264
01:19:35,570 --> 01:19:37,065
Get, over there!

1265
01:19:38,017 --> 01:19:39,215
Boom!

1266
01:19:39,574 --> 01:19:40,943
Just like in movies.

1267
01:19:44,826 --> 01:19:45,881
Oh!

1268
01:19:53,374 --> 01:19:55,283
<i>What the hell are you doing?</i>

1269
01:19:56,401 --> 01:20:00,719
Whose side are you on, cretin?
You let that moron soften you up?

1270
01:20:00,809 --> 01:20:02,985
Oh yeah, I'm the cretin?!

1271
01:20:03,032 --> 01:20:06,797
Yeah, you're a cretin; a 32 year-old
man who still watches karate films;

1272
01:20:06,877 --> 01:20:09,369
who gets suckered
like an amateur!

1273
01:20:09,497 --> 01:20:10,726
- Amateur?
- Yeah!

1274
01:20:10,756 --> 01:20:14,036
Heisting a post office at my
age, is a youthful error!

1275
01:20:14,099 --> 01:20:15,324
But at 52?...

1276
01:20:15,454 --> 01:20:17,743
Yeah, right, man. 52 years old!

1277
01:20:17,813 --> 01:20:20,904
That's why you owe me respect.
I could be your father!

1278
01:20:20,929 --> 01:20:23,200
You, my father?!
Because of your age?

1279
01:20:23,241 --> 01:20:26,076
No, 'cause I fucked your mother!

1280
01:20:28,719 --> 01:20:30,031
Take that!

1281
01:20:41,509 --> 01:20:44,546
<i>All right... you happy now?</i>

1282
01:20:44,612 --> 01:20:46,416
<i>You never went to school...</i>

1283
01:20:46,487 --> 01:20:49,841
<i>otherwise, you'd know that
if a stone falls on an egg,</i>

1284
01:20:49,895 --> 01:20:51,722
<i>it's the egg which breaks</i>

1285
01:20:52,535 --> 01:20:54,895
<i>an... egg... which...</i>

1286
01:20:55,752 --> 01:20:58,887
egg... which falls...

1287
01:21:00,032 --> 01:21:01,375
is...

1288
01:21:02,493 --> 01:21:04,063
is, isn't...

1289
01:21:05,305 --> 01:21:06,485
is...

1290
01:21:07,641 --> 01:21:09,634
'cause you can't...

1291
01:21:10,250 --> 01:21:12,444
can't save...

1292
01:21:13,447 --> 01:21:14,858
the world...

1293
01:21:15,333 --> 01:21:16,935
even if you had...

1294
01:21:17,011 --> 01:21:18,739
the eggs.

1295
01:21:26,912 --> 01:21:28,288
What?

1296
01:21:29,497 --> 01:21:32,044
We agreed,
no mother insults, right?

1297
01:21:39,174 --> 01:21:40,881
<i>I don't wanna die.</i>

1298
01:21:41,474 --> 01:21:43,256
<i>I don't wanna die.</i>

1299
01:21:44,209 --> 01:21:45,264
No.

1300
01:21:46,513 --> 01:21:48,091
I don't wanna die.

1301
01:21:49,236 --> 01:21:50,424
<i>No.</i>

1302
01:22:00,425 --> 01:22:02,418
It's over, it's over.

1303
01:22:08,984 --> 01:22:10,858
Don't worry, Jean-Claude.

1304
01:22:12,239 --> 01:22:15,109
We're better off
without the asshole.

1305
01:22:27,380 --> 01:22:28,513
<i>Hello.</i>

1306
01:22:29,771 --> 01:22:33,497
- He put a bullet in his head.
- That's nice. Put Jean-Claude on.

1307
01:22:33,982 --> 01:22:35,036
<i>Hello...</i>

1308
01:22:40,066 --> 01:22:41,145
Hello.

1309
01:22:41,629 --> 01:22:42,668
Hello.

1310
01:22:53,726 --> 01:22:55,569
- Jean-Claude.
- Hm?

1311
01:22:56,240 --> 01:22:57,865
I wanted to ask you...

1312
01:23:00,868 --> 01:23:03,869
Could you give me an autograph?

1313
01:23:07,078 --> 01:23:08,484
'To Arthur'.

1314
01:23:08,929 --> 01:23:10,023
Huh?

1315
01:23:10,458 --> 01:23:12,035
Promise?

1316
01:23:14,851 --> 01:23:15,958
Thanks.

1317
01:23:37,228 --> 01:23:38,805
The cops.

1318
01:23:39,647 --> 01:23:41,073
- No!
- Yes...

1319
01:23:46,028 --> 01:23:47,308
Arthur?

1320
01:23:48,685 --> 01:23:50,005
Arthur, don't shoot!

1321
01:23:50,991 --> 01:23:52,138
Police!

1322
01:24:04,253 --> 01:24:06,141
Police! Don't move!

1323
01:24:44,169 --> 01:24:46,373
I'm a hostage!

1324
01:24:50,590 --> 01:24:51,837
I'm a hostage!

1325
01:24:57,890 --> 01:24:59,549
<i>Get a doctor here, now!</i>

1326
01:24:59,724 --> 01:25:02,169
<i>Drop the gun!
Jean-Claude, drop the gun!</i>

1327
01:25:03,979 --> 01:25:07,395
<i>Hey, woah! Piss off!
Get out or I'll shoot!</i>

1328
01:25:07,503 --> 01:25:09,875
<i>- Drop your gun!
- Let him go.</i>

1329
01:25:10,076 --> 01:25:11,248
<i>Drop your gun!</i>

1330
01:25:12,248 --> 01:25:13,490
<i>Drop your gun!</i>

1331
01:25:16,200 --> 01:25:18,905
<i>Clear out or I'll blow him away!</i>

1332
01:25:20,705 --> 01:25:22,164
<i>It's not him!</i>

1333
01:25:26,203 --> 01:25:27,980
<i>Not Van Damme!</i>

1334
01:25:28,003 --> 01:25:29,980
It's not Jean-Claude!

1335
01:25:30,254 --> 01:25:31,535
<i>It's not him!</i>

1336
01:25:38,525 --> 01:25:40,981
- Get outta here!
- Drop the gun!

1337
01:25:41,317 --> 01:25:44,104
<i>I'll blow him away!
Get out!</i>

1338
01:27:22,492 --> 01:27:24,140
- It's not me!
<i>- Shut up!</i>

1339
01:27:36,542 --> 01:27:38,830
What are you doing, Perthier?

1340
01:27:40,876 --> 01:27:42,402
He's no criminal!

1341
01:27:42,472 --> 01:27:46,136
I'm arresting him for extorting $465,000
from the Belgian State.

1342
01:27:46,168 --> 01:27:48,136
- Extortion.
- It's not extortion!

1343
01:27:48,199 --> 01:27:50,449
- $465,000 There's no extortion!

1344
01:27:50,865 --> 01:27:52,739
You're a real asshole!

1345
01:28:07,732 --> 01:28:11,068
♪ <i>You'd better listen, my brother</i>

1346
01:28:11,482 --> 01:28:14,623
♪ <i>'Cause if you do, you can hear</i>

1347
01:28:14,872 --> 01:28:20,130
♪ <i>There are voices still calling
from across the years</i>

1348
01:28:22,131 --> 01:28:25,475
♪ <i>And they're cryin' 'cross the ocean</i>

1349
01:28:25,662 --> 01:28:29,092
♪ <i>And they're cryin' across the land</i>

1350
01:28:29,271 --> 01:28:35,146
♪ <i>And they will until we all
come to understand</i>

1351
01:28:36,006 --> 01:28:38,350
♪ <i>None of us are free</i>

1352
01:28:39,474 --> 01:28:42,193
♪ <i>None of us are free</i>

1353
01:28:42,779 --> 01:28:46,191
♪ <i>None of us are free
If one of us is chained,</i>

1354
01:28:46,279 --> 01:28:48,949
♪ <i>None of us are free</i>

1355
01:28:49,460 --> 01:28:52,629
[A few months later]

1356
01:28:54,117 --> 01:28:58,664
<i>During the trial, Jean-Claude
Van Damme seemed serene</i>

1357
01:28:58,742 --> 01:29:01,513
<i>wishing to maintain his silence.</i>

1358
01:29:01,612 --> 01:29:02,927
<i>Here he comes...</i>

1359
01:29:03,208 --> 01:29:05,404
<i>One moment. M. Van Damme,
a statement?</i>

1360
01:29:05,450 --> 01:29:08,099
Do you agree
with the court's decision?

1361
01:29:21,504 --> 01:29:23,496
<i>Chris Kurson. Chris, are you there?</i>

1362
01:29:23,560 --> 01:29:25,441
<i>Thanks, Kitty, the results are in.</i>

1363
01:29:25,495 --> 01:29:28,859
<i>Jean-Claude Van Damme has
been convicted for 3 years.</i>

1364
01:29:28,884 --> 01:29:31,500
<i>One year jail time two
years probation...</i>

1365
01:29:32,991 --> 01:29:37,109
FREN: <i>Jean-Claude Van Damme, I repeat,
has been sentenced to 3 years,</i>

1366
01:29:37,168 --> 01:29:39,414
<i>with a 1 year term
for extortion.</i>

1367
01:29:39,452 --> 01:29:42,112
<i>The actor will probably
serve his sentence</i>

1368
01:29:42,156 --> 01:29:44,259
<i>in a prison outside Brussels.</i>

1369
01:29:44,284 --> 01:29:48,312
<i>This brings to a close
a thrilling courtroom drama.</i>

1370
01:29:48,419 --> 01:29:52,168
<i>In other news, we've just learned
of the spectacular escape...</i>

1371
01:29:56,169 --> 01:29:58,919
If the knee is lower
than the foot,

1372
01:29:59,003 --> 01:30:02,311
on the windup like this,
there's no strength.

1373
01:30:02,336 --> 01:30:03,989
ENG: Lower, which is bad...

1374
01:30:04,017 --> 01:30:06,934
<i>I'm gonna kick like this,
with no power. Check...</i>

1375
01:30:07,312 --> 01:30:08,557
<i>Knee too low...</i>

1376
01:30:08,685 --> 01:30:11,927
<i>If I put my knee high,
I can even kick higher. Go higher.</i>

1377
01:30:11,973 --> 01:30:13,123
<i>Then I go: Bam!</i>

1378
01:30:13,177 --> 01:30:14,115
<i>It's something moving.</i>

1379
01:30:14,185 --> 01:30:15,652
<i>Van Damme!</i>

1380
01:30:15,722 --> 01:30:17,253
Harder. Normally...

1381
01:30:17,347 --> 01:30:18,927
What if somebody come
at me with a knife?

1382
01:30:18,963 --> 01:30:20,523
<i>- Van Damme, visitor!
</i>- A knife?

1383
01:30:20,565 --> 01:30:22,504
Then I keep my distance,
and my knee high...

1384
01:30:22,543 --> 01:30:24,286
<i>You have a knife,
I go inside you</i>

1385
01:30:24,287 --> 01:30:26,278
<i>And I can go above
you. You understand?</i>

1386
01:30:26,373 --> 01:30:28,911
FRE: Van Damme!
Visiting room!

1387
01:30:29,418 --> 01:30:30,912
EN: I'm coming.
I'm coming.

1388
01:30:32,582 --> 01:30:34,124
<i>It's my mother.</i>

1389
01:30:34,517 --> 01:30:36,362
<i>See you, guys.
Thank you.</i>

1390
01:30:52,835 --> 01:30:54,208
<i>Hi, Mom.</i>

1391
01:30:55,473 --> 01:30:56,770
FR: Aren't you cold?

1392
01:30:56,861 --> 01:31:00,444
<i>No, no. I just gave the
guys a karate lesson...</i>

1393
01:31:00,615 --> 01:31:03,341
- You teach karate?
<i>- Yeah, it passes the time.</i>

1394
01:31:03,403 --> 01:31:04,482
That's nice.

1395
01:31:04,529 --> 01:31:07,655
<i>Your father asked
how you were doing and</i>

1396
01:31:07,830 --> 01:31:10,435
<i>wanted to tell you stuff from him...</i>

1397
01:31:10,513 --> 01:31:11,646
Everything OK with him?

1398
01:31:11,685 --> 01:31:14,377
Look, I'll be right back.
I have a surprise.

1399
01:31:14,466 --> 01:31:17,381
<i>- Oh yeah?</i>
- I have a surprise. Be right back.

1400
01:31:17,544 --> 01:31:20,521
- Mom, I've had enough surprises.
<i>- Yes, wait! Be right back.</i>

1401
01:31:20,572 --> 01:31:22,599
We don't have much time.
<i>- No.</i>

1402
01:31:51,251 --> 01:31:52,454
<i>Hi.</i>

1403
01:31:57,701 --> 01:31:58,974
Hi.

1404
01:32:02,623 --> 01:32:04,388
♪

1405
01:32:04,771 --> 01:32:09,810
<font color="cyan"><font size=-2>♪Subtitles & translation by♪</font> <font color="grey"> <b>XQ2☻</b>

1406
01:32:12,542 --> 01:32:14,511
♪

1407
01:32:17,683 --> 01:32:19,370
♪

1408
01:32:23,607 --> 01:32:25,925
♪ <i>I catch a paper boy</i>

1409
01:32:26,386 --> 01:32:28,629
♪ <i>But things don't really change</i>

1410
01:32:28,910 --> 01:32:31,122
♪ <i>I'm standing in the wind</i>

1411
01:32:31,279 --> 01:32:34,138
♪ <i>But I never wave bye-bye</i>

1412
01:32:36,518 --> 01:32:39,024
♪ <i>But I try,</i>

1413
01:32:39,883 --> 01:32:43,227
♪ <i>I try (try, try)</i>

1414
01:32:46,919 --> 01:32:49,574
♪ <i>There's no sign of life</i>

1415
01:32:49,682 --> 01:32:51,817
♪ <i>It's just the power to charm</i>

1416
01:32:52,095 --> 01:32:54,091
♪ <i>I'm lying in the rain</i>

1417
01:32:54,476 --> 01:32:56,771
♪ <i>But I never wave bye-bye</i>

1418
01:32:59,921 --> 01:33:02,372
♪ <i>But I try,</i>

1419
01:33:03,034 --> 01:33:06,083
♪ <i>I try and try and try</i>

1420
01:33:07,636 --> 01:33:10,138
♪ <i>Never gonna fall for modern love</i>

1421
01:33:10,163 --> 01:33:12,684
♪ <i>walks beside me, modern love</i>

1422
01:33:12,763 --> 01:33:14,996
♪ <i>walks on by, modern love</i>

1423
01:33:15,449 --> 01:33:18,895
♪ <i>gets me to the church on time</i>

1424
01:33:19,240 --> 01:33:21,771
♪ <i>Church on time, terrifies me</i>

1425
01:33:21,830 --> 01:33:24,223
♪ <i>Church on time, makes me party</i>

1426
01:33:24,324 --> 01:33:28,910
♪ <i>Church on time, puts my
trust in god and man</i>

1427
01:33:29,527 --> 01:33:32,064
♪ <i>God and man, no confessions</i>

1428
01:33:32,141 --> 01:33:34,565
♪ <i>God and man, no religion</i>

1429
01:33:34,699 --> 01:33:39,125
♪ <i>God and man no, I don't
believe in modern love</i>

1430
01:33:39,213 --> 01:33:41,161
♪ <i>Modern love</i>

1431
01:33:53,667 --> 01:33:55,737
♪ <i>It's not really work</i>

1432
01:33:55,792 --> 01:33:58,050
♪ <i>It's just the power to charm</i>☻

1433
01:33:58,308 --> 01:34:00,347
♪ <i>Still standing in the wind</i>

1434
01:34:00,859 --> 01:34:03,608
♪ <i>But I never wave bye-bye</i>

1435
01:34:06,233 --> 01:34:08,428
♪ <i>But I try,</i>

1436
01:34:08,717 --> 01:34:13,536
♪ <i>Doo-doo-doo. I try and try and try</i>

1437
01:34:13,873 --> 01:34:16,513
♪ <i>Never gonna fall for modern love</i>

1438
01:34:16,599 --> 01:34:20,083
♪ <i>walks beside me, modern love
(Dress warm!)</i>

1439
01:34:20,443 --> 01:34:25,161
♪ <i>Modern love gets me 
to my church on time</i>

1440
01:34:25,646 --> 01:34:28,786
♪ <i>Church on time, terrifies me</i>

1441
01:34:29,068 --> 01:34:31,193
♪ <i>Ah, makes me party</i>

1442
01:34:31,443 --> 01:34:36,084
♪ <i>And it puts my trust
in God and man</i>

1443
01:34:36,109 --> 01:34:38,400
♪ <i>God and man, no confessions</i>

1444
01:34:38,517 --> 01:34:41,181
♪ <i>God and man, no religion</i>

1445
01:34:41,346 --> 01:34:45,626
♪ <i>God and man, no I don't
believe in modern love</i>

1446
01:34:45,736 --> 01:34:47,377
♪ <i>Modern love</i>

