1 00:00:00,694 --> 00:00:05,694 Subtitles by explosiveskull 2 00:00:05,696 --> 00:00:08,263 [POLICE SIRENS AND HELICOPTER] 3 00:00:08,265 --> 00:00:10,432 [POLICE RADIO CHATTER] 4 00:00:10,434 --> 00:00:13,135 VOICE: Suspect is armed and extremely dangerous. 5 00:00:13,137 --> 00:00:14,869 Snipers let me know when you are in position. 6 00:00:14,871 --> 00:00:17,075 You have a shot, take it. 7 00:00:17,407 --> 00:00:20,475 DETECTIVE: This is the police. We have you surrounded. 8 00:00:20,477 --> 00:00:22,479 Come out with your hands up. 9 00:00:23,714 --> 00:00:25,314 [YELLING IN BACKGROUND, SIRENS STILL HEARD] 10 00:00:25,316 --> 00:00:27,317 Release the hostages, Jimmy. 11 00:00:33,857 --> 00:00:37,061 Go kid. 12 00:00:43,534 --> 00:00:47,568 Release the hostages, Jimmy! Do it now! 13 00:00:47,570 --> 00:00:49,573 [GUN CLICKS] 14 00:00:50,306 --> 00:00:54,343 [GUN CONTINUES CLICKING] 15 00:00:54,345 --> 00:00:56,310 DETECTIVE: No one has to die here tonight. 16 00:00:56,312 --> 00:00:57,913 Come on, man. [gun clicks] 17 00:00:57,915 --> 00:00:59,451 [KABOOM] 18 00:01:00,417 --> 00:01:03,488 [OMINOUS DRONE] 19 00:01:04,187 --> 00:01:09,860 ♪ SOFT PIANO PLAYS ♪ 20 00:01:31,782 --> 00:01:35,320 [CAR SOUNDS] 21 00:01:35,919 --> 00:01:39,591 ♪ SOFT MUSIC BUILDS INTENSITY ♪ 22 00:02:09,819 --> 00:02:11,720 LORRAINE: Get out of the car. 23 00:02:11,722 --> 00:02:14,725 ♪ SINISTER PIANO ♪ 24 00:02:17,861 --> 00:02:20,465 [SWOOSH EFFECT] 25 00:02:29,974 --> 00:02:32,577 [GOOFY SOUND EFFECTS WITH X-FILES MUSIC] 26 00:02:36,247 --> 00:02:38,312 SHERYL: Ah! 27 00:02:38,314 --> 00:02:40,581 STAN: You motherfuckers, get the hell off my property! 28 00:02:40,583 --> 00:02:42,617 LORRAINE: Whoa, whoa. Are you fucking kidding me, right now? 29 00:02:42,619 --> 00:02:43,786 PETER: Lorraine, he has an axe. 30 00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:47,256 LORRAINE: Stan, Lorraine Taylor. "Ghostly Night Watch." 31 00:02:47,258 --> 00:02:48,990 Yeah, we're the TV people. 32 00:02:48,992 --> 00:02:50,324 STAN: Oh, yeah. [Laughs] 33 00:02:50,326 --> 00:02:51,192 LORRAINE: Yeah. STAN: Hi, TV people. 34 00:02:51,194 --> 00:02:53,694 STAN: Oh. LORRAINE: Hi. Hey, may I? 35 00:02:53,696 --> 00:02:54,829 LORRAINE: Great. 36 00:02:54,831 --> 00:02:57,534 [CUCKOO CLOCK SOUND] 37 00:02:57,867 --> 00:03:01,870 SHERYL: Oh, okay. No offense, but obviously this place is haunted. 38 00:03:01,872 --> 00:03:04,776 Case closed. 39 00:03:05,342 --> 00:03:07,442 PETER: Ew, wonder how long that's been there. 40 00:03:07,444 --> 00:03:08,543 SHERYL: Ew. DANIEL: Ah! 41 00:03:08,545 --> 00:03:09,543 What is it? 42 00:03:09,545 --> 00:03:11,513 Ants. PETER: What? 43 00:03:11,515 --> 00:03:13,548 No, I'm terrified of ants. 44 00:03:13,550 --> 00:03:14,549 Ah! 45 00:03:14,551 --> 00:03:16,317 We heard screaming. 46 00:03:16,319 --> 00:03:17,519 Daniel saw an ant. 47 00:03:17,521 --> 00:03:22,591 Oh, well, everyone. This is Stan. Stan bought this place 48 00:03:22,593 --> 00:03:26,664 in foreclosure after the incident. [thud] [screaming] 49 00:03:28,665 --> 00:03:31,299 I told you fools it wasn't safe to be here today. 50 00:03:31,301 --> 00:03:34,735 Stan, Stan, we talked about this. Yeah. 51 00:03:34,737 --> 00:03:37,972 I am so sorry. I forgot my manners. 52 00:03:37,974 --> 00:03:41,676 This place, it just gets me out of sorts. 53 00:03:41,678 --> 00:03:44,579 It's okay. 54 00:03:44,581 --> 00:03:51,419 This way. Brochures are $2, by the way. 55 00:03:51,421 --> 00:03:53,754 Okay, you two, listen. I need you to be super convincing. 56 00:03:53,756 --> 00:03:56,057 I need you get into character, get in there and 57 00:03:56,059 --> 00:03:57,825 conduct a proper interview. You got me? 58 00:03:57,827 --> 00:03:59,561 But I'm not a real forensic detective. 59 00:03:59,563 --> 00:04:00,728 I don't know how to interview. 60 00:04:00,730 --> 00:04:02,531 Yeah. And I'm not really psychic, so- 61 00:04:02,533 --> 00:04:06,571 Oh, newsflash. You're actors, so act. 62 00:04:13,476 --> 00:04:14,778 Yeah, yeah. 63 00:04:16,412 --> 00:04:18,883 ♪ SCARY MUSIC ♪ 64 00:04:25,589 --> 00:04:35,433 SHERYL: Oh, Jimmy. Oh, oh, oooh, oh, oh, oh. 65 00:04:36,433 --> 00:04:40,434 I can feel his presence.Aah. Aah. 66 00:04:40,436 --> 00:04:43,672 This is not being taken seriously. 67 00:04:43,674 --> 00:04:45,674 Shut the camera off. I'm done. 68 00:04:45,676 --> 00:04:49,813 LORRAINE: No, no, no. Stan, wait. We are taking this very seriously. 69 00:04:50,813 --> 00:04:56,684 Sir, tell us about the alleged incidents that you alleged 70 00:04:56,686 --> 00:05:00,857 to have happened around the alleged property. 71 00:05:02,125 --> 00:05:06,895 I'll tell you this. Buying this house was a big mistake. 72 00:05:06,897 --> 00:05:09,498 I mean, I thought I'd make a fortune 73 00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:15,970 in murder tour tickets. But no. One bad Yelp review, 74 00:05:15,972 --> 00:05:19,407 and that bus just stopped coming. I can't even sleep 75 00:05:19,409 --> 00:05:24,979 here because he won't let me. I actually had to move 76 00:05:24,981 --> 00:05:27,148 back into my mama's house. 77 00:05:27,150 --> 00:05:31,820 Tell me, have you ever seen or witnessed 78 00:05:31,822 --> 00:05:34,756 this ghost of a serial killer? 79 00:05:34,758 --> 00:05:39,794 I'll tell what I have seen. Shadows that shouldn't be there 80 00:05:39,796 --> 00:05:44,933 but are. Cold spots, even in the summertime. 81 00:05:44,935 --> 00:05:48,503 Lights turning off and on and shit. 82 00:05:48,505 --> 00:05:55,109 Jimmy, if you're here, turn this light off right now. 83 00:05:55,111 --> 00:05:58,515 I command thee. 84 00:06:04,087 --> 00:06:07,655 DANIEL: Oh, victim Stan, what about the horrific crime 85 00:06:07,657 --> 00:06:10,825 scene in the murder room. 86 00:06:10,827 --> 00:06:15,500 That's where he shot himself exactly five years ago tonight. 87 00:06:16,834 --> 00:06:17,967 I won't go near it. 88 00:06:17,969 --> 00:06:22,573 He actually kept the bodies in a closet over there. 89 00:06:24,875 --> 00:06:27,412 Little Mittens won't go near it either. 90 00:06:28,010 --> 00:06:31,078 And he's the friendliest cat you're ever gonna meet. 91 00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:33,215 [THUMP] DANIEL: Ah! 92 00:06:33,217 --> 00:06:37,018 SHERYL: Ah! The cat? 93 00:06:37,020 --> 00:06:39,220 That wasn't no damn cat. 94 00:06:39,222 --> 00:06:40,755 Take it easy, Stan. 95 00:06:40,757 --> 00:06:42,691 What? LORRAINE: Put it down. 96 00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:47,698 Y'all just don't get it, do you? The spirit is evil! 97 00:06:48,231 --> 00:06:55,035 With a capital Evil! It wants to cross over, and mark my words, 98 00:06:55,037 --> 00:06:59,708 he will do anything to come through. 99 00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:04,044 Do not underestimate Jimmy Timmy Beck. 100 00:07:04,046 --> 00:07:07,051 [WHOOSH SOUND] 101 00:07:09,620 --> 00:07:12,520 PETER: Uh, Jimmy Timmy? 102 00:07:12,522 --> 00:07:15,789 Don't start. We'll just shorten his name for dramatic effect. 103 00:07:15,791 --> 00:07:19,796 SHERYL: So Jim Tim? 104 00:07:22,599 --> 00:07:24,669 Oh. 105 00:07:25,269 --> 00:07:26,934 Hey, Bob, it's me. 106 00:07:26,936 --> 00:07:28,169 BOB (ON PHONE): Oh, Lorraine. 107 00:07:28,171 --> 00:07:30,871 I think I'm gonna buy this other show. I was talking to Aisha- 108 00:07:30,873 --> 00:07:32,674 No, no, no. You don't buy another show. 109 00:07:32,676 --> 00:07:34,643 This show is going to be awesome, and you are going to 110 00:07:34,645 --> 00:07:36,645 want this, and you are not going to buy anything from Aisha 111 00:07:36,647 --> 00:07:38,780 because she is a lying slutbag, and I am going to deliver 112 00:07:38,782 --> 00:07:41,215 something amazing to you in a week. 113 00:07:41,217 --> 00:07:45,287 BOB: [Voice cutting out] 114 00:07:45,289 --> 00:07:47,155 No. Fine, fine. I'll have a cut to you 115 00:07:47,157 --> 00:07:49,890 in 48 hours, Bob, I promise. Bob. 116 00:07:49,892 --> 00:07:53,061 [PHONE BEEPS, CALL LOST] 117 00:07:53,063 --> 00:07:55,729 Two years ago I was up for an Emmy and dating a Wahlberg. 118 00:07:55,731 --> 00:07:56,965 STAN: Do you have a check for me? 119 00:07:56,967 --> 00:07:59,900 Shit, Stan, you scared me! 120 00:07:59,902 --> 00:08:02,604 No. I don't have a check for you today. 121 00:08:02,606 --> 00:08:04,773 No discretionary funds. 122 00:08:04,775 --> 00:08:06,073 What the hell does that mean? 123 00:08:06,075 --> 00:08:10,712 It means you're an associate producer now. 124 00:08:10,714 --> 00:08:12,013 Hmm, is that important? 125 00:08:12,015 --> 00:08:15,215 Oh, yeah. All right. 126 00:08:15,217 --> 00:08:18,186 Okay. So you just drive safe. 127 00:08:18,188 --> 00:08:21,592 We'll see you in a couple days. 128 00:08:29,332 --> 00:08:31,232 Doesn't anybody have a landline anymore? 129 00:08:31,234 --> 00:08:33,701 PETER: We're lucky this place has working plumbing. 130 00:08:33,703 --> 00:08:35,003 So I thought that... 131 00:08:35,005 --> 00:08:36,937 LORRAINE: So here's what we're gonna do. I want you take this 132 00:08:36,939 --> 00:08:39,239 and I want you to go measure for cold spots like those, um, those 133 00:08:39,241 --> 00:08:42,676 other ghost hunting shows do. Yeah. Oh, if you find the guys 134 00:08:42,678 --> 00:08:45,015 cat, bonus. We use it as a prop. 135 00:08:46,015 --> 00:08:48,019 [BUZZ SOUND] 136 00:08:50,187 --> 00:08:54,355 ♪ OMINOUS MUSIC BEGINS ♪ 137 00:08:54,357 --> 00:08:57,794 [MAGNETIC BUZZING CONTINUES] 138 00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:01,698 This place gives me the creeps. 139 00:09:06,035 --> 00:09:10,040 [MAGNETIC BUZZING AMPLIFIES] 140 00:09:12,275 --> 00:09:15,645 [MAGNETIC BUZZING CONTINUES] 141 00:09:26,823 --> 00:09:29,193 [SCARY WHOOSH EFFECT] 142 00:09:30,394 --> 00:09:34,599 ♪ OMINOUS MUSIC CONTINUES ♪ 143 00:09:36,165 --> 00:09:40,170 [CREAKY, WINDY SOUND EFFECT] 144 00:09:42,805 --> 00:09:45,773 SHERYL: I know you said you're not that observant. 145 00:09:45,775 --> 00:09:46,441 I saw that. 146 00:09:46,443 --> 00:09:47,207 [CREAKY, SCARY, SOUNDS] 147 00:09:47,209 --> 00:09:50,011 Ah! Lorraine! 148 00:09:50,013 --> 00:09:54,018 ♪ SOFT EERIE MUSIC ♪ 149 00:09:57,821 --> 00:10:01,826 [BUZZING] 150 00:10:04,093 --> 00:10:06,363 DANIEL: Oh! Oh, Jesus. SHERYL: Oh no. 151 00:10:06,763 --> 00:10:08,799 SHERYL: Oh. 152 00:10:10,766 --> 00:10:12,767 Oh, sweet hay bales, there's the closet. 153 00:10:12,769 --> 00:10:16,307 Oh, number 12, Adele. Hello? 154 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:18,072 Good idea. We should pray. 155 00:10:18,074 --> 00:10:20,274 No, no, no. My acting coach told me that I should count down my 156 00:10:20,276 --> 00:10:23,378 favorite songs every time I get nervous, so I'm on number 11. 157 00:10:23,380 --> 00:10:24,845 Beyonce, "Crazy in Love." 158 00:10:24,847 --> 00:10:28,115 Oh. [humming] "Back That Azz Up" by Juvenile. 159 00:10:28,117 --> 00:10:29,117 ♪ SINGING ♪ 160 00:10:29,119 --> 00:10:30,784 [LOUD NOISE] [screaming] 161 00:10:30,786 --> 00:10:31,585 LORRAINE: What's happening? 162 00:10:31,587 --> 00:10:33,455 DANIEL: Uh, uh, uh, he was here. 163 00:10:33,457 --> 00:10:34,922 He was here and we saw him. 164 00:10:34,924 --> 00:10:35,923 PETER: Who was? Mittens? 165 00:10:35,925 --> 00:10:36,925 No, the ghost. 166 00:10:36,927 --> 00:10:39,194 Start recording and get in the corner, okay? 167 00:10:39,196 --> 00:10:43,034 Hey, hey, follow me. Measure for cold spots. 168 00:10:44,433 --> 00:10:47,768 LORRAINE: Hey, hey, measure for cold spots. 169 00:10:47,770 --> 00:10:50,341 Use your device. 170 00:10:54,144 --> 00:10:58,345 DANIEL: As I get closer to the closet, 171 00:10:58,347 --> 00:11:07,489 the temperature drops because that is where Jimmy ate 172 00:11:07,491 --> 00:11:12,697 his victims. Right, Sheryl? 173 00:11:13,829 --> 00:11:19,202 Um, the spirits are telling me that's where they were digested. 174 00:11:19,870 --> 00:11:23,037 SHERYL: Now I'm going to try and communicate with the spirit 175 00:11:23,039 --> 00:11:24,806 Jimmy Timmy Beck. 176 00:11:24,808 --> 00:11:25,941 Just Jimmy. 177 00:11:25,943 --> 00:11:29,811 Just Jimmy. Can you give us a sign to show us you're 178 00:11:29,813 --> 00:11:31,345 here, Jimmy? [BUZZING] 179 00:11:31,347 --> 00:11:36,187 We're not asking for much. Just a sign, a real sign. 180 00:11:36,919 --> 00:11:40,924 Just dropped four degrees cooler near the closet. 181 00:11:41,857 --> 00:11:44,392 SHERYL: Is that you, Jimmy? 182 00:11:44,394 --> 00:11:47,798 [LOUD SCARY NOISE] AH! 183 00:11:48,799 --> 00:11:50,064 Maybe that was the cat. 184 00:11:50,066 --> 00:11:53,337 That's a big fucking cat. 185 00:11:53,536 --> 00:11:56,204 [SCREAMING] 186 00:11:56,206 --> 00:11:58,306 JIMMY: Son of a bitch, something bit me! 187 00:11:58,308 --> 00:12:00,141 LORRAINE: Cut! You're fired. 188 00:12:00,143 --> 00:12:03,378 What? Because of a bug bite? I'm calling my agent. 189 00:12:03,380 --> 00:12:04,513 LORRAINE: Go call your agent. 190 00:12:04,515 --> 00:12:08,218 You're still fired. You suck. Afraid of fucking bugs. 191 00:12:08,985 --> 00:12:11,018 I think I had a minor stroke. 192 00:12:11,020 --> 00:12:12,186 I think I wet myself. 193 00:12:12,188 --> 00:12:15,290 DANIEL: I'm gonna have a long-term fear of closets. 194 00:12:15,292 --> 00:12:17,524 SHERYL: Hey, what's going on here? 195 00:12:17,526 --> 00:12:21,461 Did you hire an actor who looks just like the real Jimmy Beck, 196 00:12:21,463 --> 00:12:24,298 and [laughs] why was he hiding in the closet? 197 00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:28,369 I hired a look alike. So what? edit out the last five seconds 198 00:12:28,371 --> 00:12:31,505 and we have two TV hosts scared shitless encountering the ghost 199 00:12:31,507 --> 00:12:34,075 of a crazed serial killer. Winning. 200 00:12:34,077 --> 00:12:36,009 SHERYL: But he's not really a ghost. 201 00:12:36,011 --> 00:12:40,514 And you aren't really a psychic. This is reality TV and we are 202 00:12:40,516 --> 00:12:43,383 creating the reality TV that people want. 203 00:12:43,385 --> 00:12:47,257 Fuck, I have an idea. Go get that idiot. 204 00:12:50,125 --> 00:12:53,927 You two have no idea what is on the line here. 205 00:12:53,929 --> 00:12:57,364 If this works, I promise you it is going to be life 206 00:12:57,366 --> 00:13:01,502 changing for all of us. I just need you guys to run around for 207 00:13:01,504 --> 00:13:04,372 a couple hours, play ghost hunters, look scared 208 00:13:04,374 --> 00:13:08,442 around every corner, and I promise you I'm gonna make this 209 00:13:08,444 --> 00:13:13,648 worth your while. How's a spa weekend on me sound? 210 00:13:13,650 --> 00:13:15,952 Very thoughtful and sweet. 211 00:13:16,919 --> 00:13:19,954 But unfortunately, I can't accept that. 212 00:13:19,956 --> 00:13:22,556 Why? Guys do spas all the time. 213 00:13:22,558 --> 00:13:25,659 Oh, it's not that. I'm just super scared of steam. 214 00:13:25,661 --> 00:13:29,062 Oh, come on! Do you know how many red carpets 215 00:13:29,064 --> 00:13:31,132 I have been to this year? 216 00:13:31,134 --> 00:13:34,034 None! I need this. 217 00:13:34,036 --> 00:13:38,439 I want this. I can feel it. 218 00:13:38,441 --> 00:13:43,447 And if you aren't with me, there's the door. 219 00:13:44,313 --> 00:13:48,383 Well, it's kind of far back to town and I don't think 220 00:13:48,385 --> 00:13:55,322 you'll give me a ride, so yes, for the spa weekend, I'll do it. 221 00:13:55,324 --> 00:13:57,358 Yeah. As long as you don't scare me anymore. 222 00:13:57,360 --> 00:13:59,326 I am so proud I cast you two. 223 00:13:59,328 --> 00:14:01,995 PETER: Find an actor? Find my dick with your lips. 224 00:14:01,997 --> 00:14:04,965 ACTOR: Mom, can you come get me? I... hello? 225 00:14:04,967 --> 00:14:07,301 [CROWS CAWING] Hello. Ah! [CALL DROPS] 226 00:14:07,303 --> 00:14:09,439 [CHAINSAW SOUND EFFECT] [Screams] 227 00:14:13,576 --> 00:14:16,347 PETER: Hmm. 228 00:14:17,347 --> 00:14:20,016 [mumbles] Huh. 229 00:14:21,284 --> 00:14:23,621 Dude's a ghost. 230 00:14:24,353 --> 00:14:26,421 DANIEL: Three bedroom, two bath in the valley. 231 00:14:26,423 --> 00:14:29,257 SHERYL: Ah, kudos on the two full baths in case you have 232 00:14:29,259 --> 00:14:30,691 a guest, you know? 233 00:14:30,693 --> 00:14:34,595 LORRAINE: Oh ya. Oh, and the guy from "One Tree Hill" is my neighor 234 00:14:34,597 --> 00:14:36,229 SHERYL: Ooh. 235 00:14:36,231 --> 00:14:39,167 You live next to Jean Claude Van Damme? 236 00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:42,305 Did you sleep with him yet? 237 00:14:43,305 --> 00:14:44,305 PETER: Sleep with who? 238 00:14:44,307 --> 00:14:46,139 Inappropriate, Pete. 239 00:14:46,141 --> 00:14:49,543 I was just asking. Anyway, no idea where that actor dude went. 240 00:14:49,545 --> 00:14:51,446 Yeah, I'll deal with him later. Get the camera on the 241 00:14:51,448 --> 00:14:53,413 closet door, and hurry! 242 00:14:53,415 --> 00:14:55,486 DANIEL: Huh! 243 00:14:56,385 --> 00:14:59,287 Whoa! 244 00:14:59,289 --> 00:15:00,989 Sorry, I missed it. 245 00:15:00,991 --> 00:15:03,992 Story of my life. 246 00:15:03,994 --> 00:15:05,560 DANIEL: You rigged the door. 247 00:15:05,562 --> 00:15:08,562 Of course. Do you think they open on their own? 248 00:15:08,564 --> 00:15:10,064 [ELECTRIC SOUND EFFECTS] 249 00:15:10,066 --> 00:15:11,532 Did you rig that too? 250 00:15:11,534 --> 00:15:14,538 No, I didn't. 251 00:15:16,438 --> 00:15:20,544 Hey, guys. Listen to this. 252 00:15:23,413 --> 00:15:25,178 DEMONIC VOICE: This is my house. 253 00:15:25,180 --> 00:15:27,681 Holy bats in the belfry. 254 00:15:27,683 --> 00:15:31,051 That really happened. There's really a ghost. 255 00:15:31,053 --> 00:15:31,952 [POP] 256 00:15:31,954 --> 00:15:33,553 LORRAINE: Yeah, to being ghost hunters. 257 00:15:33,555 --> 00:15:35,690 SHERYL: Hmm, to being famous. 258 00:15:35,692 --> 00:15:39,560 You know what? It is time to put the past behind us. To all the 259 00:15:39,562 --> 00:15:43,330 people that doubted me, especially producers named Bob. 260 00:15:43,332 --> 00:15:46,200 That indie role I probably didn't get. 261 00:15:46,202 --> 00:15:48,536 To my ex-girlfriend Janet who left me in the church, 262 00:15:48,538 --> 00:15:50,071 and now she's a whore. 263 00:15:50,073 --> 00:15:51,739 SHERYL: Oh, no I'm sure she's not. 264 00:15:51,741 --> 00:15:54,341 No. She's a legit whore. 265 00:15:54,343 --> 00:15:57,277 Yeah. She barters her vagina for cocaine. 266 00:15:57,279 --> 00:15:59,047 Oh. 267 00:15:59,049 --> 00:16:00,349 Okay. 268 00:16:00,351 --> 00:16:04,051 PETER: Uh, not really good at this stuff, but, um, my dad got 269 00:16:04,053 --> 00:16:06,586 cancer last year and beat it. 270 00:16:06,588 --> 00:16:08,589 That's great. 271 00:16:08,591 --> 00:16:14,228 Then he died in a car accident, which sucked. It was a stormy 272 00:16:14,230 --> 00:16:16,364 night, the road was really windy, and the... the 273 00:16:16,366 --> 00:16:22,402 cliff kinda jumped out at him. Plus he was hammered. But he was 274 00:16:22,404 --> 00:16:25,306 a really good drunk driver normally. I was supposed to pick 275 00:16:25,308 --> 00:16:29,343 him up but, uh, I got sidetracked on Tinder talking to 276 00:16:29,345 --> 00:16:32,647 this girl. I sent her a dick pic, she sent me a dick pic 277 00:16:32,649 --> 00:16:36,651 back, which was really... anyway. He sent me a text right 278 00:16:36,653 --> 00:16:37,551 before he disintegrated. 279 00:16:37,553 --> 00:16:42,125 He said, "Son, I want you to know... 280 00:16:44,693 --> 00:16:47,030 my fucking car's on fire." 281 00:16:49,164 --> 00:16:50,630 I still have the text. 282 00:16:50,632 --> 00:16:54,337 Okay, then. Um, let's get back to it. 283 00:16:55,138 --> 00:16:57,404 I'd like a camera over there. You think you can 284 00:16:57,406 --> 00:16:58,806 handle that, Pete? 285 00:16:58,808 --> 00:17:00,240 Yeah. Okay. 286 00:17:00,242 --> 00:17:02,278 Sure. 287 00:17:08,784 --> 00:17:12,790 ♪ SOFT SPOOKY SOUNDS ♪ 288 00:17:13,255 --> 00:17:15,388 [LEAVES RUSTLING] 289 00:17:15,390 --> 00:17:18,192 Put a camera in all of these trees, Pete? All the 290 00:17:18,194 --> 00:17:20,561 trees? Yeah, all the trees, Pete, 291 00:17:20,563 --> 00:17:24,499 because [BIRDS CAWING] I want you to do all this extra work. 292 00:17:24,501 --> 00:17:26,900 [BIRDS CONTINUE TO CAW] 293 00:17:26,902 --> 00:17:29,640 LORRAINE: Pete, time is money. 294 00:17:30,473 --> 00:17:34,175 PETER: This is for producers named Bob that don't respect me and admire 295 00:17:34,177 --> 00:17:37,145 me like Pete does, because who gives a fuck 296 00:17:37,147 --> 00:17:38,713 what Pete thinks. 297 00:17:38,715 --> 00:17:42,884 Oh, this is for that role I didn't get because I didn't blow 298 00:17:42,886 --> 00:17:48,188 enough producers. Oh, this is for my ex-girlfriend selling her 299 00:17:48,190 --> 00:17:51,260 twat for crack cocaine. 300 00:17:51,828 --> 00:17:53,293 I don't even like champagne. 301 00:17:53,295 --> 00:17:54,594 LORRAINE: Peter! 302 00:17:54,596 --> 00:17:57,631 I'm putting up the camera. 303 00:17:57,633 --> 00:18:00,169 [BIRDS CAWING] 304 00:18:01,504 --> 00:18:03,204 LORRAINE: Time is money! 305 00:18:03,206 --> 00:18:05,842 Yes, ma'am. 306 00:18:12,215 --> 00:18:16,220 [BIRDS CAWING] 307 00:18:17,286 --> 00:18:19,587 SHERYL: You ever get the feeling we're being watched? 308 00:18:19,589 --> 00:18:22,790 LORRAINE: Stop complaining about stalkers. At my age you're gonna 309 00:18:22,792 --> 00:18:24,891 want someone to follow you home and watch you undress. 310 00:18:24,893 --> 00:18:27,895 No. I mean, like, right now. 311 00:18:27,897 --> 00:18:30,564 What? [TORTURED SCREAMING] 312 00:18:30,566 --> 00:18:32,567 Ah! 313 00:18:32,569 --> 00:18:33,333 What was that? 314 00:18:33,335 --> 00:18:34,668 What the hell? 315 00:18:34,670 --> 00:18:36,305 What is that? 316 00:18:36,906 --> 00:18:38,505 PETER: Hey, guys. [SCREAMING] 317 00:18:38,507 --> 00:18:39,573 Found some beef jerky. 318 00:18:39,575 --> 00:18:42,211 Can you stop screwing around and go get your camera? 319 00:18:43,713 --> 00:18:47,718 Okay. Time to check out the room we're calling the death chamber. 320 00:18:48,450 --> 00:18:50,621 [DISTANT HOWLING] 321 00:18:51,454 --> 00:18:53,955 LORRAINE: Okay. So you guys remember what we rehearsed? 322 00:18:53,957 --> 00:18:57,861 Good, good. Pete, are you rolling? And action. 323 00:18:58,494 --> 00:19:00,761 SHERYL: We're here on the Beck property, haunted site 324 00:19:00,763 --> 00:19:05,265 of numerous grisly murders. As you can see, it's very dark and 325 00:19:05,267 --> 00:19:08,002 I can feel that evil is present. 326 00:19:08,004 --> 00:19:11,472 DANIEL: The killer buried lots of bodies around 327 00:19:11,474 --> 00:19:15,676 this here Beck property. My partner will use her psychic 328 00:19:15,678 --> 00:19:20,380 powers. I will use my forensic science expertise. We will 329 00:19:20,382 --> 00:19:24,484 locate and conquer this paranormal activity 330 00:19:24,486 --> 00:19:26,286 that we detect. 331 00:19:26,288 --> 00:19:27,754 Now, the spirit has already shown 332 00:19:27,756 --> 00:19:29,357 some displeasure with us being here, 333 00:19:29,359 --> 00:19:31,562 so we have to be very careful. 334 00:19:34,997 --> 00:19:36,731 Okay. No one's gonna jump out of here though, right? 335 00:19:36,733 --> 00:19:38,666 LORRAINE: No. SHERYL: No. We'll be fine. 336 00:19:38,668 --> 00:19:42,673 [DOOR CREAKS] [CRICKET SOUNDS] 337 00:19:43,672 --> 00:19:46,676 [FLY BUZZING] 338 00:19:59,554 --> 00:20:01,358 [HEAVY DOOR SLAM] 339 00:20:01,791 --> 00:20:04,794 ♪ PARANORMAL MUSIC ♪ 340 00:20:05,027 --> 00:20:06,894 SHERYL: Hmm. DANIEL: Hmm. 341 00:20:06,896 --> 00:20:09,566 Hmm. Hmm. 342 00:20:10,632 --> 00:20:13,434 There seems to be a red paint-like substance on the 343 00:20:13,436 --> 00:20:15,468 - Hmm. - floor here. 344 00:20:15,470 --> 00:20:16,337 [BLOOD DRIP SOUNDS] 345 00:20:16,339 --> 00:20:18,705 SHERYL: Ah. Yes, I think that's blood. 346 00:20:18,707 --> 00:20:21,542 Oh. [FLY BUZZING] Ah, hmm. 347 00:20:21,544 --> 00:20:22,776 Oh. 348 00:20:22,778 --> 00:20:25,748 [BLOOD DRIPS AND FLY BUZZING CONTINUE] 349 00:20:25,948 --> 00:20:28,983 Hmm, well, that's strange. 350 00:20:28,985 --> 00:20:30,987 Hmm. 351 00:20:35,057 --> 00:20:39,462 [SCREAMING] 352 00:20:40,729 --> 00:20:44,764 [GUSHY BLOOD DRIPS] 353 00:20:44,766 --> 00:20:48,705 [SCREAMS CONTINUE AND FADE] 354 00:20:52,909 --> 00:20:55,743 Ew, ew, ew. 355 00:20:55,745 --> 00:20:58,678 PETER: [laughing] We found the cat. 356 00:20:58,680 --> 00:20:59,613 Shut up. 357 00:20:59,615 --> 00:21:03,516 God, my top. Oh, I've got cat blood on me. 358 00:21:03,518 --> 00:21:05,519 I can't get blood exposure from this, can I? 359 00:21:05,521 --> 00:21:06,954 Like, cat hepatitis? 360 00:21:06,956 --> 00:21:08,421 - Awesome. - How did it look? 361 00:21:08,423 --> 00:21:09,756 - Yeah. - Swear? 362 00:21:09,758 --> 00:21:11,024 Mm, Let me see it. 363 00:21:11,026 --> 00:21:15,995 Blood, boobs, money shot. Oh, my God. 364 00:21:15,997 --> 00:21:18,534 Was this you, Lorraine? 365 00:21:18,767 --> 00:21:20,501 Me? 366 00:21:20,503 --> 00:21:22,636 Yeah. You wanted the cat as a prop. 367 00:21:22,638 --> 00:21:25,039 Judge Judy would call that a motive, man. 368 00:21:25,041 --> 00:21:30,477 Okay. I donate to PETA, and I am deathly allergic of cats. 369 00:21:30,479 --> 00:21:32,980 Hey, who turned the house lights off? 370 00:21:32,982 --> 00:21:36,887 [ELECTRICITY BUZZING] 371 00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:41,856 DANIEL: Uh, um- LORRAINE: Let's get in there. 372 00:21:41,858 --> 00:21:44,425 Our psychic is gonna call out that ghost. 373 00:21:44,427 --> 00:21:46,726 Wait, what? How am I gonna do that? 374 00:21:46,728 --> 00:21:49,696 Positive energy. Let's do this. 375 00:21:49,698 --> 00:21:51,799 Uh, you should really clean that shirt up. 376 00:21:51,801 --> 00:21:53,970 [whining] 377 00:21:55,470 --> 00:21:57,804 I bet you blood on boobs attracts ghosts. 378 00:21:57,806 --> 00:21:59,139 LORRAINE: Inappropriate, Pete! 379 00:21:59,141 --> 00:22:00,677 Sorry! 380 00:22:00,976 --> 00:22:05,515 [GOAT SOUNDS EFFECTS] [CRICKETS] 381 00:22:14,457 --> 00:22:18,626 SHERYL: Oh, I can't wait to get this blood off. 382 00:22:18,628 --> 00:22:20,461 LORRAINE: Whoa. SHERYL: Oh, God. 383 00:22:20,463 --> 00:22:23,934 I don't remember my 20s being so perky. 384 00:22:27,469 --> 00:22:30,103 PETER: Got you some flashlights. Holy tits! 385 00:22:30,105 --> 00:22:33,709 - Sorry. I was just, uh- - Inappropriate, Pete. 386 00:22:38,980 --> 00:22:40,481 Here's some extra batteries. 387 00:22:40,483 --> 00:22:44,488 - Pete! - That's a really nice rack. 388 00:22:51,726 --> 00:22:54,563 [CRICKETS] 389 00:22:56,966 --> 00:22:59,736 Hey! 390 00:23:00,469 --> 00:23:02,171 Somebody's been in here. 391 00:23:03,139 --> 00:23:06,443 That door was open when we left. 392 00:23:08,177 --> 00:23:09,709 Don't you bullshit me, Pete. 393 00:23:09,711 --> 00:23:12,646 [ELECTRICITY BUZZING] 394 00:23:12,648 --> 00:23:16,750 DANIEL: Okay. This can't be good. We should go back outside. 395 00:23:16,752 --> 00:23:19,219 LORRAINE: No, this is great. Keep rolling. 396 00:23:19,221 --> 00:23:22,555 [DOOR CREAKING] 397 00:23:22,557 --> 00:23:25,125 At least my timer still works. 398 00:23:25,127 --> 00:23:27,227 Your timer's not there. 399 00:23:27,229 --> 00:23:28,963 LORRAINE: Oh. 400 00:23:28,965 --> 00:23:30,997 SHERYL: Something's fishy here. 401 00:23:30,999 --> 00:23:32,699 Like with the house. 402 00:23:32,701 --> 00:23:35,069 I don't trust her. 403 00:23:35,071 --> 00:23:37,871 Pete, you need to tell us what she's up to. 404 00:23:37,873 --> 00:23:40,709 Me? How would I know? 405 00:23:41,910 --> 00:23:46,813 Look, even if it is her, she's never gone this far before. 406 00:23:46,815 --> 00:23:49,250 Don't make me do it. 407 00:23:49,252 --> 00:23:50,885 What, are you guys like five? 408 00:23:50,887 --> 00:23:52,956 [SQUEAK AND DOOR SLAM] 409 00:23:54,689 --> 00:23:56,857 Actor guy? 410 00:23:56,859 --> 00:23:58,962 LORRAINE: Who's in there? 411 00:23:59,794 --> 00:24:02,263 Keep rolling. We're going in. 412 00:24:02,265 --> 00:24:03,298 I'm not going in there. 413 00:24:03,300 --> 00:24:06,032 Don't you pull the diva card with me, young lady. 414 00:24:06,034 --> 00:24:08,636 When I found you, you were Drunk Sorority Chick Number 3 on an 415 00:24:08,638 --> 00:24:10,538 episode of "Scream Queens." 416 00:24:10,540 --> 00:24:12,606 For the record, I was Drunk Girl Number 2. 417 00:24:12,608 --> 00:24:14,611 Whatever. 418 00:24:15,210 --> 00:24:16,776 You were on "Scream Queens"? 419 00:24:16,778 --> 00:24:18,781 Get in there now. 420 00:24:21,551 --> 00:24:23,751 [HOWLING AND CRICKET SOUNDS INTENSIFY] 421 00:24:23,753 --> 00:24:27,756 ♪ SOFT SPOOKY AMBIENCE ♪ 422 00:24:34,196 --> 00:24:38,767 SHERYL: Hello? Jimmy? 423 00:24:40,636 --> 00:24:43,603 Was that you we heard? 424 00:24:43,605 --> 00:24:47,340 If this was a horror film, a cat would jump out right now. 425 00:24:47,342 --> 00:24:51,177 Pretty sure the cat's jumping days are over. 426 00:24:51,179 --> 00:24:55,284 That's a good point, Pete. Poor little Mittens. 427 00:24:56,953 --> 00:25:00,690 Jimmy, if that was you, can you do that again? 428 00:25:01,056 --> 00:25:03,090 [BUZZING SOUND] 429 00:25:03,092 --> 00:25:04,861 DANIEL: 70 degrees even. 430 00:25:05,226 --> 00:25:09,765 Uh, uh. [sigh] 431 00:25:13,335 --> 00:25:18,705 [ATMOSPHERIC SOUNDS BUILD] 432 00:25:18,707 --> 00:25:23,045 [DOOR CREAKING] 433 00:25:26,047 --> 00:25:30,286 ♪ GOOFY INSPECTOR MUSIC ♪ 434 00:25:32,787 --> 00:25:34,355 DANIEL: Still 70 degrees. 435 00:25:34,357 --> 00:25:38,926 [CAR HORN HONKING] [BUZZING] 436 00:25:38,928 --> 00:25:42,966 LORRAINE: Son of a bitch. 437 00:25:45,301 --> 00:25:46,766 [MACHINE BEEPS, CAR HONKING] 438 00:25:46,768 --> 00:25:48,804 DANIEL: It just went up a degree. 439 00:25:49,905 --> 00:25:52,008 [HONKING CONTINUES] 440 00:25:53,876 --> 00:25:58,044 LORRAINE: What the fuck... [gasps]. Holy fucking shit - Are you - 441 00:25:58,046 --> 00:26:00,850 [muffled screams] [CAR HONKING CONTINUES] 442 00:26:02,851 --> 00:26:03,885 [LIGHT SWTICH SOUND EFFECT] 443 00:26:03,887 --> 00:26:05,852 DANIEL: Pete, you got anymore batteries. 444 00:26:05,854 --> 00:26:08,022 SHERYL: Yeah. He's got a lot of batteries. 445 00:26:08,024 --> 00:26:11,425 PETER: Um, yeah. They're Cs. 446 00:26:11,427 --> 00:26:14,128 DANIEL: Oh. SHERYL: Oh, God. 447 00:26:14,130 --> 00:26:16,765 What do-these take Ds? 448 00:26:18,066 --> 00:26:19,602 I prefer Double Ds. 449 00:26:21,836 --> 00:26:23,640 I can't believe I'm in the middle of this. 450 00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:26,842 I can't believe I'm in the middle of this either. 451 00:26:27,776 --> 00:26:29,778 I want to go home. 452 00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:35,251 PETER: It's gonna be okay, buddy. It's gonna be okay. 453 00:26:35,685 --> 00:26:37,621 [ELECTRICITY CRACKLES] 454 00:26:37,852 --> 00:26:39,221 See? 455 00:26:40,055 --> 00:26:42,089 Anything? [MACHINE STARTS BEEPING] 456 00:26:42,091 --> 00:26:45,792 Instant temperature drop. Back in business. 457 00:26:45,794 --> 00:26:47,630 [RELIEVED SIGH] 458 00:26:47,996 --> 00:26:49,698 Uh, actually... 459 00:26:50,800 --> 00:26:53,970 Oh. I think we just debunked our cold spots. 460 00:26:57,105 --> 00:26:58,105 [MACHINE BEEPING] 461 00:26:58,107 --> 00:27:01,978 Where's Lorraine. [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING] 462 00:27:04,313 --> 00:27:06,980 Looks like there's our answer. 463 00:27:06,982 --> 00:27:11,187 Debunked our light problem. It's our producer, Lorraine. 464 00:27:11,486 --> 00:27:15,958 That's two for two. Come on out, Lorraine. 465 00:27:16,358 --> 00:27:17,491 I don't think this is Lorraine. 466 00:27:17,493 --> 00:27:21,331 My inner voice is telling me this is definitely her. 467 00:27:22,331 --> 00:27:23,464 You know what we should do? 468 00:27:23,466 --> 00:27:26,233 Call Judge Judy right now. 469 00:27:26,235 --> 00:27:29,903 No. We should scare her. 470 00:27:29,905 --> 00:27:32,106 I don't think that's possible. One time 471 00:27:32,108 --> 00:27:33,773 I saw her get bit by a rattlesnake. 472 00:27:33,775 --> 00:27:35,743 She sucked out the poison, killed the snake, and then made 473 00:27:35,745 --> 00:27:39,513 me a belt. She's like Chuck Norris, just way sexier. 474 00:27:39,515 --> 00:27:42,416 Okay. Well, look. If she wants to mess around with dead cats 475 00:27:42,418 --> 00:27:46,119 and all this sick shit, I say we give it right back to her. 476 00:27:46,121 --> 00:27:48,421 Like the Ten Commandments. When people do 477 00:27:48,423 --> 00:27:50,823 stuff to you, you gotta do stuff back to people. 478 00:27:50,825 --> 00:27:54,994 Exactly. If she wants to keep scaring us, guess what? 479 00:27:54,996 --> 00:27:58,000 Two people can play at that game. 480 00:27:59,901 --> 00:28:03,771 DANIEL: Maybe we should hide or something. 481 00:28:03,773 --> 00:28:05,138 PETER: I'm not hiding. I'm a grownup. 482 00:28:05,140 --> 00:28:07,107 SHERYL: She's hiding and she's got a three-bedroom house in the 483 00:28:07,109 --> 00:28:09,345 valley. PETER: Had a house. 484 00:28:10,211 --> 00:28:11,311 What? 485 00:28:11,313 --> 00:28:13,981 She had a House. She sold it to pay for this show. 486 00:28:13,983 --> 00:28:16,550 Now she lives above a methadone clinic a mile from 487 00:28:16,552 --> 00:28:18,151 me in Van Nuys 488 00:28:18,153 --> 00:28:20,853 Oh, she's such a liar. 489 00:28:20,855 --> 00:28:22,889 She's a Class A sinner, that one. 490 00:28:22,891 --> 00:28:25,894 Oh, she's got a good heart and she's just, uh... 491 00:28:26,461 --> 00:28:30,531 buries it deep, really, really deep. 492 00:28:30,533 --> 00:28:32,800 SHERYL: Mm, you so have a crush on her. 493 00:28:32,802 --> 00:28:35,869 Oh, no. [laughs] No, I... 494 00:28:35,871 --> 00:28:38,839 SHERYL: Whatever. She's just using you. I think she likes chicks. 495 00:28:38,841 --> 00:28:39,872 No, she doesn't! 496 00:28:39,874 --> 00:28:42,010 [ELECTRICITY CRACKLES] 497 00:28:44,112 --> 00:28:45,878 DANIEL: Can we please just find her and prove that she 498 00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:47,915 is behind all of this? Because if not, I am going to be 499 00:28:47,917 --> 00:28:49,382 convinced that there is a ghost under my bed 500 00:28:49,384 --> 00:28:50,417 the rest of my life. 501 00:28:50,419 --> 00:28:51,686 Okay. We'll be those meddling kids from "Dukes 502 00:28:51,688 --> 00:28:55,555 of Hazzard." You can be Bo, you can be Luke, and I'll be Daisy. 503 00:28:55,557 --> 00:28:58,926 PETER: Uh, meddling kids was "Scooby Doo," and that was Daphne. 504 00:28:58,928 --> 00:29:01,360 DANIEL: Yeah. I don't want to be the racist people from that show 505 00:29:01,362 --> 00:29:03,263 that got canceled for being racist. 506 00:29:03,265 --> 00:29:04,363 They weren't racist. 507 00:29:04,365 --> 00:29:06,032 Says the white guy. 508 00:29:06,034 --> 00:29:07,234 I'm half Portuguese. 509 00:29:07,236 --> 00:29:09,269 Okay. So is she Daphne or is she Daisy? 510 00:29:09,271 --> 00:29:09,969 I'm so confused. 511 00:29:09,971 --> 00:29:11,237 Can we just find the fuse box? 512 00:29:11,239 --> 00:29:13,543 Yes. Maybe in there. 513 00:29:17,580 --> 00:29:20,516 LORRAINE: [muffled screams] Hey! Hey! [screaming] 514 00:29:22,117 --> 00:29:26,255 ♪ GOOFY INSPECTOR MUSIC ♪ 515 00:29:37,131 --> 00:29:39,398 SHERYL: I bet it's in the garage. 516 00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:41,568 DANIEL: More blood. SHERYL: Ooh. 517 00:29:41,570 --> 00:29:43,503 [BLOOD DRIP SOUNDS] DANIEL: That is blood, right, Pete? 518 00:29:43,505 --> 00:29:44,603 PETER: Oh, yeah. 519 00:29:44,605 --> 00:29:48,542 Oh, Lorraine. I just got over the last dead animal. 520 00:29:48,544 --> 00:29:50,878 I'm not going in there, guys. You don't understand. 521 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:53,246 I have an extreme phobia of being murdered. 522 00:29:53,248 --> 00:29:56,885 That's not a phobia. Everybody's afraid of being murdered. 523 00:29:57,887 --> 00:29:59,919 Well, I don't care. I'm gonna go outside and 524 00:29:59,921 --> 00:30:01,021 wait for Lorraine. 525 00:30:01,023 --> 00:30:04,961 [ROPE TIGHTENING SOUND EFFECT] 526 00:30:05,960 --> 00:30:09,966 EMMETT: [Sniffing] Mm. 527 00:30:10,966 --> 00:30:12,968 Nice boots. 528 00:30:13,268 --> 00:30:17,036 LORRAINE: [Muffled] Thank you. 529 00:30:17,038 --> 00:30:20,175 [SPOOKY AMBIENCE ] 530 00:30:32,921 --> 00:30:36,058 [CRICKETS] 531 00:30:43,399 --> 00:30:44,697 SHERYL: Get the champagne, Pete. 532 00:30:44,699 --> 00:30:46,966 Wait a second. DANIEL: What? 533 00:30:46,968 --> 00:30:50,974 Look. [SPOOKY AMBIENCE INTENSIFIES] 534 00:30:54,709 --> 00:30:58,578 This car is a 2012. You can tell right by the steering wheel. 535 00:30:58,580 --> 00:31:01,113 She always told me it was brand new. 536 00:31:01,115 --> 00:31:04,386 Huh. Time to drink. 537 00:31:06,021 --> 00:31:08,524 [CRICKETS] 538 00:31:13,329 --> 00:31:16,933 [MUFFLED SCREAMS] 539 00:31:22,137 --> 00:31:24,340 [CLATTERING TOOLS] 540 00:31:31,013 --> 00:31:34,281 EMMETT: Sea salt filtered through holy water, blessed by 541 00:31:34,283 --> 00:31:36,550 a Catholic Bishop. 542 00:31:36,552 --> 00:31:41,390 One spirit-detecting candle made by a Native American shaman. 543 00:31:42,358 --> 00:31:47,226 I'm sorry, but today being the very anniversary of 544 00:31:47,228 --> 00:31:51,465 Jimmy's suicide, it's the only day that I can do this... 545 00:31:51,467 --> 00:31:54,400 [MUFFLED] Do what? 546 00:31:54,402 --> 00:31:57,236 Gut that son of a bitch 547 00:31:57,238 --> 00:32:01,108 who murdered my brother when I was in prison. 548 00:32:01,110 --> 00:32:04,680 [Muffled] I don't follow you. I really don't ...ah. 549 00:32:07,682 --> 00:32:14,286 Jimmy Timmy Beck. I can barely say that asshole's name. 550 00:32:14,288 --> 00:32:15,755 It's easier if you drop the Timmy. 551 00:32:15,757 --> 00:32:19,626 [ELECTRIC STATIC] 552 00:32:19,628 --> 00:32:25,599 You know I'm here for you, Jimmy. You see, I was doing 553 00:32:25,601 --> 00:32:29,235 a bid in McDougal for armed robbery when he snatched my 554 00:32:29,237 --> 00:32:35,074 brother like he did the others. He brought him here to this very 555 00:32:35,076 --> 00:32:40,082 place and he did things to him. 556 00:32:40,448 --> 00:32:44,317 PETER: I used to love the bacon cheeseburgers at Sully's. 557 00:32:44,319 --> 00:32:45,484 They're delicious. 558 00:32:45,486 --> 00:32:49,089 They come with these fries, baked beans, and coleslaw. 559 00:32:49,091 --> 00:32:53,627 Then they went out of business so I started going to Twain's. 560 00:32:53,629 --> 00:32:57,664 They had this amazing French dip. 561 00:32:57,666 --> 00:32:58,799 The portions were kinda small, 562 00:32:58,801 --> 00:33:04,006 but it was worth it for the price. 563 00:33:05,373 --> 00:33:10,077 EMMETT: You know, in this light you look just like him. 564 00:33:10,079 --> 00:33:11,645 Are you kidding me? 565 00:33:11,647 --> 00:33:13,346 Yeah. 566 00:33:13,348 --> 00:33:17,349 Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh. 567 00:33:17,351 --> 00:33:19,418 Ugh. 568 00:33:19,420 --> 00:33:21,620 PETER: Got used to going there and then, of course, they went 569 00:33:21,622 --> 00:33:28,128 out of business too. So I started going to, uh, Du-Par's. 570 00:33:28,130 --> 00:33:30,163 They had a really good, uh, beet salad that I liked. 571 00:33:30,165 --> 00:33:31,398 [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING] 572 00:33:31,400 --> 00:33:34,367 SHERYL: How sad is that? 573 00:33:34,369 --> 00:33:37,540 She's still at it. 574 00:33:38,540 --> 00:33:41,577 Wait a minute. Look at that. 575 00:33:42,578 --> 00:33:44,711 DANIEL: Who's that guy? 576 00:33:44,713 --> 00:33:46,378 I don't know. Maybe that asshole Bob from 577 00:33:46,380 --> 00:33:50,085 the network she's always talking about. 578 00:33:50,886 --> 00:33:52,785 He's probably in there commending her on her 579 00:33:52,787 --> 00:33:58,226 work ethic. Man, she's got a real commitment to this show. 580 00:33:58,861 --> 00:34:06,069 Wait. But if she's in there, who's messing with the fuse box? 581 00:34:12,307 --> 00:34:20,213 EMMETT: Tonight, Jimmy Beck's soul has the power to cross over 582 00:34:20,215 --> 00:34:25,818 into another living body at the exact moment of his death five 583 00:34:25,820 --> 00:34:33,292 years ago today at precisely 6:66 p.m. 584 00:34:33,294 --> 00:34:35,361 That's 7:06, you fucktard. 585 00:34:35,363 --> 00:34:38,298 And with the proper incantation, his body can 586 00:34:38,300 --> 00:34:43,336 enter our realm for exactly one hour. How do I know this, do you 587 00:34:43,338 --> 00:34:47,207 ask? Well, I happen to meet a French Quarter voodoo priest 588 00:34:47,209 --> 00:34:50,510 online who gave me the exact invocation for this very ritual 589 00:34:50,512 --> 00:34:55,314 here. Yeah. Uh, I am totally rocking this whole spiritual 590 00:34:55,316 --> 00:35:01,720 diversity thing. Some of this shit's gotta work, right? 591 00:35:01,722 --> 00:35:02,955 SHERYL: What about the blood? 592 00:35:02,957 --> 00:35:04,925 PETER: We gotta find out what's controlling these lights? 593 00:35:04,927 --> 00:35:06,593 At this point, I don't care if that blood's 594 00:35:06,595 --> 00:35:08,394 from a dismembered Labradoodle. 595 00:35:08,396 --> 00:35:09,762 DANIEL: What's a Labradoodle? 596 00:35:09,764 --> 00:35:11,631 It's like when a Labrador mates a Poodle, 597 00:35:11,633 --> 00:35:12,765 or a Poodle mates a Labrador. 598 00:35:12,767 --> 00:35:13,633 SHERYL: Mm-hmm. 599 00:35:13,635 --> 00:35:15,568 I can't remember who has to be on top. 600 00:35:15,570 --> 00:35:16,803 EMMETT: You know this 601 00:35:16,805 --> 00:35:20,506 whole abbreviated serial killer thing has not been easy on me, 602 00:35:20,508 --> 00:35:23,510 you know? Uh, I'm a nice guy, but I had to walk in his shoes 603 00:35:23,512 --> 00:35:27,914 to get in the right frame of mind. First, I did the cat. I 604 00:35:27,916 --> 00:35:29,582 fucking hate cats. Second, 605 00:35:29,584 --> 00:35:34,854 I did that whiny little actor friend of yours. Uh, third, 606 00:35:34,856 --> 00:35:37,524 I fucking raped the shit out of his goat. 607 00:35:37,526 --> 00:35:42,262 Oh, fuck me. And last, last but not least, 608 00:35:42,264 --> 00:35:43,863 I'm gonna be killing you. 609 00:35:43,865 --> 00:35:44,898 LORRAINE: Me? 610 00:35:44,900 --> 00:35:46,033 Yeah. Uh, you see 611 00:35:46,035 --> 00:35:49,336 um, I want his spirit to enter a living body so I can 612 00:35:49,338 --> 00:35:52,872 torment him like he did my brother. Yeah. I'm gonna slice 613 00:35:52,874 --> 00:35:56,443 him. I'm gonna slice him from his throat all the way down to 614 00:35:56,445 --> 00:36:00,981 his taint. I am gonna watch the life leave his eyes just like he 615 00:36:00,983 --> 00:36:04,383 did my brother. He didn't deserve what he got. 616 00:36:04,385 --> 00:36:07,387 He wasn't even a tranny. 617 00:36:07,389 --> 00:36:08,787 You lost me. 618 00:36:08,789 --> 00:36:11,490 Jimmy Timmy Beck only killed transvestite midget 619 00:36:11,492 --> 00:36:13,526 circus clowns. You did not know this? 620 00:36:13,528 --> 00:36:16,463 I'm shocked. Yeah. The fucking papers kept it quiet 621 00:36:16,465 --> 00:36:18,765 because they didn't want to discourage the fucking precious 622 00:36:18,767 --> 00:36:21,401 carnival from coming in every year, but, you know, still. I 623 00:36:21,403 --> 00:36:25,372 don't know why he picked my brother. He wasn't even a midget 624 00:36:25,374 --> 00:36:26,939 or a fucking clown for that matter. 625 00:36:26,941 --> 00:36:28,841 Okay. Let me get this straight for one second. 626 00:36:28,843 --> 00:36:31,577 You're gonna get a murderer's spirit to enter my 627 00:36:31,579 --> 00:36:34,814 body for one hour; is that correct? 628 00:36:34,816 --> 00:36:35,914 Yeah, that's correct. 629 00:36:35,916 --> 00:36:38,684 Okay. And then you're gonna kill me, but you actually 630 00:36:38,686 --> 00:36:40,586 think that you're killing the murderer's spirit that is in 631 00:36:40,588 --> 00:36:43,289 my body; am I correct again? 632 00:36:43,291 --> 00:36:44,158 Correct. 633 00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:47,459 Okay. So listen to me. Why wouldn't you 634 00:36:47,461 --> 00:36:50,497 have used, I don't know, let's say maybe the actor who looked 635 00:36:50,499 --> 00:36:52,064 exactly like the murderer's spirit? 636 00:36:52,066 --> 00:36:54,566 I'm not having sex with a guy. 637 00:36:54,568 --> 00:36:57,836 What the fuck? You didn't say anything about sex. 638 00:36:57,838 --> 00:37:01,341 Is this supposed to before or after you're gonna kill me? 639 00:37:01,343 --> 00:37:02,475 Correct. 640 00:37:02,477 --> 00:37:04,878 What? Oh, no. This has to be some sick fucking joke. 641 00:37:04,880 --> 00:37:09,619 Shh. [MUFFLED SCREAMS] 642 00:37:13,622 --> 00:37:15,957 PETER: Well, I guess that rules out a Labradoodle. 643 00:37:16,957 --> 00:37:18,390 [DOOR CREAKS METAL CRASH] 644 00:37:18,392 --> 00:37:21,394 [SCREAMING] 645 00:37:21,396 --> 00:37:24,863 Revenge is hard to explain, it really is, okay? 646 00:37:24,865 --> 00:37:27,966 It will be him, but it will be you, you know I 647 00:37:27,968 --> 00:37:31,070 mean, I have spent the last six years in a men's prison, and... 648 00:37:31,072 --> 00:37:35,441 and, and a woman with all of her working lady parts, it'll be a 649 00:37:35,443 --> 00:37:36,876 nice change for me. I'm looking forward to it. 650 00:37:36,878 --> 00:37:39,044 [MUFFLED] You fucking psychopath. 651 00:37:39,046 --> 00:37:42,381 His body cannot enter this circle here. I will be 652 00:37:42,383 --> 00:37:47,921 protected, and you on the other side, you're gonna die. Okay. 653 00:37:47,923 --> 00:37:53,626 Uh, this is Viagra for my penis. 654 00:37:53,628 --> 00:37:55,631 [ELECTRICAL FORCE FIELD] 655 00:37:59,968 --> 00:38:01,901 That's the worst bug bite I've ever seen. 656 00:38:01,903 --> 00:38:03,903 SHERYL: Mm-hmm. 657 00:38:03,905 --> 00:38:05,939 Poor little actor guy. 658 00:38:05,941 --> 00:38:08,908 Is he really, you know? 659 00:38:08,910 --> 00:38:13,879 Dead? Either that or he's a really good actor. 660 00:38:13,881 --> 00:38:14,948 Check his pulse. 661 00:38:14,950 --> 00:38:16,952 [DARK DREARY CHIMES] 662 00:38:27,896 --> 00:38:29,662 I don't feel anything. 663 00:38:29,664 --> 00:38:36,503 That's not where his pulse is. It's over here. 664 00:38:36,505 --> 00:38:38,407 Or maybe over here. 665 00:38:41,410 --> 00:38:44,042 Find it? 666 00:38:44,044 --> 00:38:45,945 This dude is dead. 667 00:38:45,947 --> 00:38:47,950 [GURGLING AND SCREAM] 668 00:38:58,427 --> 00:39:00,059 DANIEL: Hmm. 669 00:39:00,061 --> 00:39:01,593 Maybe now he's dead. 670 00:39:01,595 --> 00:39:02,861 LORRAINE: [Screaming] 671 00:39:02,863 --> 00:39:04,733 EMMETT: [LAUGHING] 672 00:39:06,168 --> 00:39:07,233 Uh... 673 00:39:07,235 --> 00:39:10,637 Shit. Lorraine might really be in trouble in there. 674 00:39:10,639 --> 00:39:11,637 Then we should run away, guys. 675 00:39:11,639 --> 00:39:15,543 We should run far away right now. And get help. 676 00:39:21,849 --> 00:39:24,853 Come on, Pete. 677 00:39:27,856 --> 00:39:32,495 EMMETT: Come for me, Jimmy Timmy. 678 00:39:33,494 --> 00:39:37,696 Come for me, Jimmy Timmy Beck. 679 00:39:37,698 --> 00:39:41,468 Enter this physical vessel which I have 680 00:39:41,470 --> 00:39:44,140 provided for you. 681 00:39:49,510 --> 00:39:51,010 Welcome. 682 00:39:51,012 --> 00:39:52,879 [DOOR RATTLES OPEN] 683 00:39:52,881 --> 00:39:55,582 Whoo! Aah! 684 00:39:55,584 --> 00:39:57,950 Beat me with a broom stick. 685 00:39:57,952 --> 00:40:01,423 You have ruined my circle. 686 00:40:01,923 --> 00:40:02,955 SHERYL: Get away. 687 00:40:02,957 --> 00:40:04,256 Unh-unh. 688 00:40:04,258 --> 00:40:07,526 Oh. Oh, hey 689 00:40:07,528 --> 00:40:11,534 Pete, could you, like, man up here and do something, please? 690 00:40:14,202 --> 00:40:15,200 Shit. 691 00:40:15,202 --> 00:40:17,236 Technically that was something. 692 00:40:17,238 --> 00:40:19,071 He's like a ninja. 693 00:40:19,073 --> 00:40:25,077 You have ruined my fucking ritual. The spirit needs a body. 694 00:40:25,079 --> 00:40:28,082 SHERYL: [SCREAMING] 695 00:40:31,653 --> 00:40:33,923 DANIEL: [SCREAMING] 696 00:40:34,256 --> 00:40:36,789 Oh, hey, we gotta go. We gotta get to the car. Hurry up. 697 00:40:36,791 --> 00:40:38,258 No, no, no. The car doesn't work. He ripped... 698 00:40:38,260 --> 00:40:39,091 he ripped the wires out. 699 00:40:39,093 --> 00:40:40,526 SHERYL: What the hell is going on? 700 00:40:40,528 --> 00:40:41,794 We have to get out now. 701 00:40:41,796 --> 00:40:43,195 You're kind of dodging the question. 702 00:40:43,197 --> 00:40:46,201 No, I'm dodging him! 703 00:40:49,303 --> 00:40:54,606 Get over here! Ah! 704 00:40:54,608 --> 00:40:56,611 [SCREAMING] 705 00:40:58,847 --> 00:41:01,713 DANIEL: Ah, ah, ah, sir, sir. 706 00:41:01,715 --> 00:41:02,582 Seriously, man, just take a pill. 707 00:41:02,584 --> 00:41:04,617 No, no! No more pills. No more pills. 708 00:41:04,619 --> 00:41:10,657 Which one of you pieces of shit murdered my brother? Hmm? 709 00:41:10,659 --> 00:41:12,191 None of us! None of us, sir. We don't know 710 00:41:12,193 --> 00:41:13,258 what you're talking about. 711 00:41:13,260 --> 00:41:14,526 LORRAINE: Jimmy Beck. He's trying 712 00:41:14,528 --> 00:41:16,963 to raise the spirit for an hour of sadomasochism and mutilation. 713 00:41:16,965 --> 00:41:20,198 I want revenge on that motherfucker for what he did to 714 00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:26,738 my brother Dale. He doesn't seem to be in any one of you though. 715 00:41:26,740 --> 00:41:28,975 Well, you don't see us lining up for Ringling Brothers Circus, 716 00:41:28,977 --> 00:41:29,975 do you? 717 00:41:29,977 --> 00:41:31,311 What? 718 00:41:31,313 --> 00:41:32,812 LORRAINE: Oh, yeah. Jimmy's victims were all cross-dressing 719 00:41:32,814 --> 00:41:34,280 circus clowns under 5'7". 720 00:41:34,282 --> 00:41:35,747 He killed poor little munchkins. 721 00:41:35,749 --> 00:41:39,885 His spirit is out. I can feel it. 722 00:41:39,887 --> 00:41:42,220 But why didn't it enter a body, hmm? 723 00:41:42,222 --> 00:41:44,356 Sir, sir, we don't know, okay? 724 00:41:44,358 --> 00:41:47,961 Back. Hey, hey, do me a favor. Just... just put down the knife. 725 00:41:47,963 --> 00:41:50,696 Give... give Pete the knife. 726 00:41:50,698 --> 00:41:51,932 Actually Sheryl's closer. 727 00:41:51,934 --> 00:41:55,133 Hand Pete the knife. Hand Pete the knife. Hand Pete the knife. 728 00:41:55,135 --> 00:41:56,336 Yeah. Hand Pete the knife. 729 00:41:56,338 --> 00:41:58,236 Yeah. Aah! 730 00:41:58,238 --> 00:42:00,606 The body, it has no choice but to enter 731 00:42:00,608 --> 00:42:03,008 another one for one hour. 732 00:42:03,010 --> 00:42:04,109 [EVIL LAUGH] 733 00:42:04,111 --> 00:42:08,213 It's not supposed to go. Fucking Jimmy Timmy! Just... 734 00:42:08,215 --> 00:42:11,917 [ELECTRIC MELTDOWN SOUND] 735 00:42:11,919 --> 00:42:14,921 What the fuck are you doing? Get back! Stay back! Stay back! 736 00:42:14,923 --> 00:42:16,289 Fuck why didn't it work? 737 00:42:16,291 --> 00:42:20,126 Oh, Shit! Maybe I got this all wrong. 738 00:42:20,128 --> 00:42:22,128 Maybe I got it all wrong. 739 00:42:22,130 --> 00:42:23,329 [EVIL LAUGHTER] 740 00:42:23,331 --> 00:42:26,633 I've done everything! I was waiting a year for this shit! 741 00:42:26,635 --> 00:42:30,836 Maybe the spirit can't cross over into a living body. 742 00:42:30,838 --> 00:42:33,039 Maybe it's gotta be fucking dead. 743 00:42:33,041 --> 00:42:37,709 [HARD IMPACT PERCUSSION HIT] EMMET: Oh, fuck... 744 00:42:37,711 --> 00:42:40,847 Oh, I have been waiting for this! 745 00:42:40,849 --> 00:42:43,816 [GHASTLY SCREAMS] 746 00:42:43,818 --> 00:42:46,084 [SHATTER SOUNDS] 747 00:42:46,086 --> 00:42:48,187 Run! Hey, Mr. Dead Guy! Hey, hey, hey, 748 00:42:48,189 --> 00:42:52,194 Mr. Dead Guy! Get his knife! Get his knife! Ahh! 749 00:42:53,394 --> 00:42:54,593 JIMMY: I'm the one who does the gutting 750 00:42:54,595 --> 00:43:02,267 around here, Emmett. And I'm gonna do you just like I did 751 00:43:02,269 --> 00:43:10,276 your whiny little brother while he begged and begged, 752 00:43:10,278 --> 00:43:15,280 Just the tip, Jimmy. Just the tip. 753 00:43:15,282 --> 00:43:16,282 [GROANS] 754 00:43:16,284 --> 00:43:18,119 [KNIFE STRIKE] 755 00:43:21,289 --> 00:43:23,856 Oh, well, that was a bit extreme. 756 00:43:23,858 --> 00:43:25,258 [GROANING] 757 00:43:25,260 --> 00:43:28,093 What's with the whole last dying breath thing? 758 00:43:28,095 --> 00:43:30,162 Ah! [SHOCK SCREAM] 759 00:43:30,164 --> 00:43:33,365 Who's next? You? 760 00:43:33,367 --> 00:43:35,734 Me? 761 00:43:35,736 --> 00:43:37,370 But you look like the "cut my cock off and 762 00:43:37,372 --> 00:43:39,171 grow a pair of tits type. 763 00:43:39,173 --> 00:43:40,907 N... No, I don't. 764 00:43:40,909 --> 00:43:46,745 Yeah, you do. You've got enough whore makeup on to be a clown. 765 00:43:46,747 --> 00:43:49,782 Hah, I just use a little bronzer, that's it. 766 00:43:49,784 --> 00:43:56,289 Hmm. And you're just a lying little bitch. 767 00:43:56,291 --> 00:44:00,492 LORRAINE: Touché. JIMMY: Heh. 768 00:44:00,494 --> 00:44:02,697 [SCREAMING] 769 00:44:11,905 --> 00:44:19,010 LORRAINE: It isn't going to start! Keep going! 770 00:44:19,012 --> 00:44:21,213 DANIEL: In hindsight, this probably wasn't a great idea. 771 00:44:21,215 --> 00:44:24,883 SHERYL: Ugh, Taking this gig? Tell me about it. 772 00:44:24,885 --> 00:44:26,519 God dammit, we're off the grid. 773 00:44:26,521 --> 00:44:28,954 Can't even check Facebook. 774 00:44:28,956 --> 00:44:31,157 Do you remember how far we are from town? 775 00:44:31,159 --> 00:44:34,093 Like, what five miles? I don't remember. 776 00:44:34,095 --> 00:44:41,434 (Laughing) We are not going out there. Hello? Stranger danger. 777 00:44:41,436 --> 00:44:44,269 That's a good point. Probably a lot more 778 00:44:44,271 --> 00:44:47,173 dangerous out there than in here with a possessed killer. 779 00:44:47,175 --> 00:44:49,841 The devil you know, right? 780 00:44:49,843 --> 00:44:52,278 Hey, maybe he can't leave the house. 781 00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:54,283 [DISTANT DOOR SLAM] 782 00:44:54,548 --> 00:44:56,751 [CRUNCHING OF LEAVES] 783 00:44:59,988 --> 00:45:03,321 These boots weren't meant for running, Pete. 784 00:45:03,323 --> 00:45:05,825 Okay. I think I have an idea. 785 00:45:05,827 --> 00:45:07,292 PETER: Okay. 786 00:45:07,294 --> 00:45:11,263 LORRAINE: So the evil spirit in that dead body has an hour time limit, 787 00:45:11,265 --> 00:45:12,999 so the clock is ticking. 788 00:45:13,001 --> 00:45:14,934 I kind of missed the whole origin story. 789 00:45:14,936 --> 00:45:20,173 Just listen. All we have to do is hunker down and wait it out. 790 00:45:20,175 --> 00:45:24,510 That makes sense. Actually, none of that makes sense. 791 00:45:24,512 --> 00:45:28,213 Okay. So here's the plan. I'm gonna go hide in the dead cat 792 00:45:28,215 --> 00:45:30,283 shed over there and you're gonna go get the camera. 793 00:45:30,285 --> 00:45:34,053 phew, no. no. no, that... what? 794 00:45:34,055 --> 00:45:36,122 Someone's gotta film this, Pete. 795 00:45:36,124 --> 00:45:38,825 I mean, this is like the "Blair Witch Project" times twenty. 796 00:45:38,827 --> 00:45:41,294 I mean, think about the money and the job security, Pete. 797 00:45:41,296 --> 00:45:42,961 I'm thinking about not getting raped in the 798 00:45:42,963 --> 00:45:44,896 ass and murdered by that thing back there. 799 00:45:44,898 --> 00:45:48,300 I mean, we could probably get another job somewhere. 800 00:45:48,302 --> 00:45:51,604 I don't see him. Maybe he followed Lorraine and Pete. 801 00:45:51,606 --> 00:45:55,975 [LOUD CRASH OF TWISTED METAL] 802 00:45:55,977 --> 00:45:59,044 [EXHALES] I held my breath for a full minute that time. 803 00:45:59,046 --> 00:46:04,350 Whew. That is not bad for someone with asthma. 804 00:46:04,352 --> 00:46:06,919 Oh, God, I don't believe this. 805 00:46:06,921 --> 00:46:09,155 Huh, What? 806 00:46:09,157 --> 00:46:10,923 Ugh, I just had a thought. 807 00:46:10,925 --> 00:46:13,392 Lorraine said she'd give me that free spa weekend, right? 808 00:46:13,394 --> 00:46:14,593 DANIEL: Mm-hmm. 809 00:46:14,595 --> 00:46:15,827 But this new situation, does it change that? I mean, what 810 00:46:15,829 --> 00:46:18,898 what if something happens to her? Do I still get the weekend? 811 00:46:18,900 --> 00:46:19,765 It was a verbal agreement. 812 00:46:19,767 --> 00:46:22,468 Hmm, great. So I'm gonna get screwed. 813 00:46:22,470 --> 00:46:25,004 She better live, that's all I have to say. 814 00:46:25,006 --> 00:46:27,006 No. No, no, no, no. Judge Judy would say that 815 00:46:27,008 --> 00:46:29,441 it's legally binding. She... 816 00:46:29,443 --> 00:46:31,376 she'd rule in your favor on that one. 817 00:46:31,378 --> 00:46:36,548 [BRANCHES SNAPPING AND A DEEP GASP] 818 00:46:36,550 --> 00:46:37,649 Please tell me that was you. 819 00:46:37,651 --> 00:46:40,051 Unh-unh. 820 00:46:40,053 --> 00:46:44,059 [SCREAMING] 821 00:47:02,510 --> 00:47:09,615 [GOATS BLEATING] 822 00:47:09,617 --> 00:47:11,117 LORRAINE: Hold still. 823 00:47:11,119 --> 00:47:12,318 PETER: I am holding still. 824 00:47:12,320 --> 00:47:14,053 [GOATS BLEATING] 825 00:47:14,055 --> 00:47:18,124 The goat's over there. I don't want him to attack us. 826 00:47:18,126 --> 00:47:20,126 Why would the goat attack us? 827 00:47:20,128 --> 00:47:22,260 Wouldn't you be pissed off if you were fucked in the ass by 828 00:47:22,262 --> 00:47:23,428 a crazy psycho killer? 829 00:47:23,430 --> 00:47:27,233 [GOATS BLEATING] 830 00:47:27,235 --> 00:47:29,535 I ain't afraid of no goats. Let's go. 831 00:47:29,537 --> 00:47:31,540 [CHIMES AND MARIMBA] 832 00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:41,414 I think we lost him. 833 00:47:41,416 --> 00:47:46,051 Okay. What do we know about this Jimmy Beck ghost guy? 834 00:47:46,053 --> 00:47:48,153 He was probably bullied a lot as a child, 835 00:47:48,155 --> 00:47:50,356 maybe even some as a ghost. I don't know. 836 00:47:50,358 --> 00:47:51,590 I bet no one went to his funeral 837 00:47:51,592 --> 00:47:53,392 and that hurt his feelings and... and 838 00:47:53,394 --> 00:47:55,227 caused him to become even more of a sicko freakish 839 00:47:55,229 --> 00:47:56,195 psychotic killing machine. 840 00:47:56,197 --> 00:47:58,564 No. I mean, why would he want to hurt us? 841 00:47:58,566 --> 00:48:00,432 We're not his style. Think about it. 842 00:48:00,434 --> 00:48:03,369 His issues are tranny clown midgets. 843 00:48:03,371 --> 00:48:05,403 You have to say transgender little people. 844 00:48:05,405 --> 00:48:07,573 Do you think Daniel and Sheryl are ok? 845 00:48:07,575 --> 00:48:09,541 Ah, the universe protects idiots, Pete. 846 00:48:09,543 --> 00:48:11,209 I would've cast the girl from the condom commercial, 847 00:48:11,211 --> 00:48:14,113 but she didn't fucking call me back. 848 00:48:14,115 --> 00:48:16,314 Uh, Lor... Lorraine? 849 00:48:16,316 --> 00:48:18,084 I could get a film deal from this. 850 00:48:18,086 --> 00:48:20,086 Even better, I could get a book deal from this. 851 00:48:20,088 --> 00:48:21,687 I mean, this could probably put me back on the map. 852 00:48:21,689 --> 00:48:23,321 Lorraine? 853 00:48:23,323 --> 00:48:30,463 What? Where's the cat? 854 00:48:30,465 --> 00:48:32,467 [DEAD MOANING CAT] 855 00:48:37,738 --> 00:48:39,941 [TORTURED CAT] 856 00:48:41,441 --> 00:48:46,211 Listen to me. We're not his demographic. 857 00:48:46,213 --> 00:48:49,217 You're right. That's profiling 101. 858 00:48:51,552 --> 00:48:53,555 I should've known that. 859 00:48:54,389 --> 00:48:56,390 Mm. 860 00:49:02,630 --> 00:49:05,497 This guy's breaking all the serial killer rules, Sheryl. 861 00:49:05,499 --> 00:49:07,666 Do you want to stick around and tell him, Daniel? 862 00:49:07,668 --> 00:49:09,135 Ahh! 863 00:49:09,137 --> 00:49:10,436 Oh, ahh. 864 00:49:10,438 --> 00:49:12,238 Okay, girl. Get it together. 865 00:49:12,240 --> 00:49:14,372 You can do this. You take pilates twice a week. 866 00:49:14,374 --> 00:49:16,441 You are Lorraine Taylor. You're gonna have a 867 00:49:16,443 --> 00:49:17,510 major book deal from this. 868 00:49:17,512 --> 00:49:18,747 [PETRIFIED CAT MEOWING] 869 00:49:19,280 --> 00:49:20,445 Peter? 870 00:49:20,447 --> 00:49:22,314 [PETRIFIED CAT MEOWING] 871 00:49:22,316 --> 00:49:25,050 Huh!, Fucking zombie cat. 872 00:49:25,052 --> 00:49:27,419 [PETRIFIED CAT SCREECHING] 873 00:49:27,421 --> 00:49:29,789 This is why I'm a dog person. 874 00:49:29,791 --> 00:49:37,762 [PETRIFIED CAT SCREECHING] 875 00:49:37,764 --> 00:49:39,532 Hey! Ow! 876 00:49:39,534 --> 00:49:43,135 Oh, Peter, thank God. I didn't know where you were. 877 00:49:43,137 --> 00:49:44,236 You were worried about me? 878 00:49:44,238 --> 00:49:47,740 You have the flashlight. I think I lost an earring. 879 00:49:47,742 --> 00:49:49,175 Of course. 880 00:49:49,177 --> 00:49:51,077 Thank you. 881 00:49:51,079 --> 00:49:52,077 Where's Lorraine? 882 00:49:52,079 --> 00:49:53,079 God! 883 00:49:53,081 --> 00:49:54,479 Oh! Thank God! 884 00:49:54,481 --> 00:49:54,981 Ah! 885 00:49:54,983 --> 00:49:56,682 Hey! Oh, it's me. 886 00:49:56,684 --> 00:49:58,316 Okay. Okay. 887 00:49:58,318 --> 00:50:01,387 Hey, that label said "Willard," not "Prada." 888 00:50:01,389 --> 00:50:03,088 So? 889 00:50:03,090 --> 00:50:04,657 The boots are knock offs? 890 00:50:04,659 --> 00:50:05,725 So what? 891 00:50:05,727 --> 00:50:07,792 Judge Judy would call that copyright infringement. 892 00:50:07,794 --> 00:50:10,195 Well, fuck Judge Judy and fuck you too, Daniel. And you know 893 00:50:10,197 --> 00:50:13,698 what? Fuck you, fuck you, and fuck this fucking ghost. I don't 894 00:50:13,700 --> 00:50:16,434 need approval from any of you people. Do you think you're 895 00:50:16,436 --> 00:50:19,437 always gonna be in your 20s? Let me tell you a little story about 896 00:50:19,439 --> 00:50:20,539 me when I was 20. 897 00:50:20,541 --> 00:50:22,541 Not the youth squandered speech again. 898 00:50:22,543 --> 00:50:24,843 We get it. You've had to compromise. You've made 899 00:50:24,845 --> 00:50:27,680 mistakes, which leads us to your biggest one, the lookalike actor 900 00:50:27,682 --> 00:50:30,282 you hired who now has a crazed ghost killer inside of him and 901 00:50:30,284 --> 00:50:33,285 is currently chasing after us with a knife trying to kill us. 902 00:50:33,287 --> 00:50:37,455 So we're going to suck it up and go hide in the dead cat shed. 903 00:50:37,457 --> 00:50:39,191 By the way, the cat's not dead. 904 00:50:39,193 --> 00:50:40,593 Little Mittens is alive and well? 905 00:50:40,595 --> 00:50:41,461 Not really. 906 00:50:41,463 --> 00:50:45,597 Yeah, he's undead, like Jimmy. Hell, 907 00:50:45,599 --> 00:50:47,533 everything around here seems susceptible to being raised from 908 00:50:47,535 --> 00:50:50,702 the dead after whatever black magic that douchebag screwed up. 909 00:50:50,704 --> 00:50:52,637 But if everything can be raised... 910 00:50:52,639 --> 00:50:55,173 That means not only the cat, 911 00:50:55,175 --> 00:50:56,876 but those midget clowns he killed too. 912 00:50:56,878 --> 00:50:59,081 [LIGHT CHIMES WITH GIGGLING] 913 00:51:00,180 --> 00:51:03,182 Still, Why would they want to hurt us? 914 00:51:03,184 --> 00:51:04,082 Yeah. 915 00:51:04,084 --> 00:51:05,783 They... we didn't do anything to them. 916 00:51:05,785 --> 00:51:07,253 Ow! [LAUGHTER OF MIDGETS] 917 00:51:07,255 --> 00:51:09,622 Is anything here rational? 918 00:51:09,624 --> 00:51:10,722 Ow! 919 00:51:10,724 --> 00:51:11,923 Hey 920 00:51:11,925 --> 00:51:15,294 Hey, you cocksucking clowns, stop throwing rocks right now! 921 00:51:15,296 --> 00:51:18,229 Ow! Oww!! [MIDGET LAUGHTER] 922 00:51:18,231 --> 00:51:19,465 Jesus! 923 00:51:19,467 --> 00:51:21,470 [LAUGHTER] 924 00:51:40,720 --> 00:51:42,220 I so hate this house. 925 00:51:42,222 --> 00:51:43,222 [MIDGET DEMON LAUGHTER] 926 00:51:43,224 --> 00:51:46,858 [SCARY DARK SOUND] 927 00:51:46,860 --> 00:51:55,568 [MONSTER GROWL] 928 00:51:55,570 --> 00:51:59,707 [WOODEN DOOR CREAKS] 929 00:52:05,713 --> 00:52:07,745 [DOOR SLAMMING SOUND] 930 00:52:07,747 --> 00:52:10,751 [DARK, SCARY CRESCENDO OF STRINGS] 931 00:52:25,900 --> 00:52:26,899 [TROMBONE SQUELCH] 932 00:52:26,901 --> 00:52:28,904 [CANDY BAR THUD] 933 00:52:31,606 --> 00:52:33,638 [BLOOD TRICKLING SOUND] 934 00:52:33,640 --> 00:52:37,945 Leaking all over my damn house. 935 00:52:42,950 --> 00:52:49,454 [EXHALING] I held my breath another minute. 936 00:52:49,456 --> 00:52:51,490 It seems to be my ceiling. 937 00:52:51,492 --> 00:52:53,658 Number 10, Wilson Phillips, "Hold On." 938 00:52:53,660 --> 00:52:57,896 Number nine, Kelly Clarkson, "Since You Been Gone." 939 00:52:57,898 --> 00:52:59,631 Shh. 940 00:52:59,633 --> 00:53:03,602 I'm sorry. I'm just really nervous, and I have to pee. 941 00:53:03,604 --> 00:53:04,937 I really do. 942 00:53:04,939 --> 00:53:07,939 So do I. We should've hit the bathroom. 943 00:53:07,941 --> 00:53:09,975 I know. There's three of them in here and we can't use 944 00:53:09,977 --> 00:53:13,012 any of them right now. One of my worst fears actually. 945 00:53:13,014 --> 00:53:15,217 [CACOPHONY OF SOUNDS] 946 00:53:29,963 --> 00:53:33,899 [WOOD DOOR CREAK] 947 00:53:33,901 --> 00:53:35,904 [CRESCENDO OF STRINGS] 948 00:53:41,742 --> 00:53:43,745 [DOOR RATTLES THEN THUD] 949 00:53:55,689 --> 00:53:58,890 Do you think he left? 950 00:53:58,892 --> 00:54:00,425 Yeah. 951 00:54:00,427 --> 00:54:02,429 [CLASSICAL ROMANTIC MUSIC] 952 00:54:12,773 --> 00:54:15,776 [SCREAMING] 953 00:54:18,713 --> 00:54:20,715 [SCREAMING] 954 00:54:28,622 --> 00:54:36,364 Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater, had a girl but couldn't keep her. 955 00:54:37,564 --> 00:54:38,564 [FOOT CLATTER] 956 00:54:38,566 --> 00:54:40,666 [BONE SMASHING HIT] 957 00:54:40,668 --> 00:54:42,834 We're not like those pussies on those other ghost shows. 958 00:54:42,836 --> 00:54:46,504 Yeah. That's right. That's for 959 00:54:46,506 --> 00:54:54,412 my ex-girlfriend, the whore, her pimp, and cock and balls. 960 00:54:54,414 --> 00:54:58,483 Oh, yeah. Kill that dead motherfucker. 961 00:54:58,485 --> 00:55:00,586 [BONE SOUND] 962 00:55:00,588 --> 00:55:06,695 Now, that's an exorcism. Ew, you got brains on your top. 963 00:55:10,697 --> 00:55:12,064 Ew. 964 00:55:12,066 --> 00:55:17,568 Shit, Lorraine. Lorraine, 965 00:55:17,570 --> 00:55:26,778 stay with me. We beat Beck, you hear me? Okay. We won. 966 00:55:26,780 --> 00:55:31,450 You... you got it on film? 967 00:55:31,452 --> 00:55:34,656 Yeah, we sure did. 968 00:55:37,657 --> 00:55:42,396 Inappropriate, Pete. 969 00:55:45,198 --> 00:55:48,700 Pete? 970 00:55:48,702 --> 00:55:50,705 Yeah. 971 00:55:52,572 --> 00:55:54,575 Is she... 972 00:55:55,776 --> 00:55:57,779 Wait for it. 973 00:56:01,115 --> 00:56:04,486 [SCREAMING] 974 00:56:06,486 --> 00:56:07,385 Yeah, now, she's dead. 975 00:56:07,387 --> 00:56:11,823 You sure? She tends to lie a lot, Pete. 976 00:56:11,825 --> 00:56:15,463 There goes my spa weekend. 977 00:56:16,863 --> 00:56:19,867 You gonna be okay? 978 00:56:23,236 --> 00:56:25,439 Yeah. 979 00:56:26,673 --> 00:56:28,707 You think you could put the toilet seat down for me, 980 00:56:28,709 --> 00:56:32,714 because I really have to go. 981 00:56:36,717 --> 00:56:38,050 Let's talk about this whole possession thing. 982 00:56:38,052 --> 00:56:40,952 So the spirit doesn't go into the living, 983 00:56:40,954 --> 00:56:43,955 it goes into the dead for an hour. And then when you 984 00:56:43,957 --> 00:56:47,559 smash the dead dude's head, it leaves the body? 985 00:56:47,561 --> 00:56:50,865 [TOILET FLUSHES] 986 00:56:51,865 --> 00:56:53,999 Yeah, but then where does it go? 987 00:56:54,001 --> 00:56:57,903 Because he's still got another 20 minutes left in this world 988 00:56:57,905 --> 00:57:03,077 according to my watch. 989 00:57:04,077 --> 00:57:07,916 Your turn. 990 00:57:12,919 --> 00:57:18,159 Pardon me. [SCREAMING] 991 00:57:20,927 --> 00:57:21,794 Ow! 992 00:57:21,796 --> 00:57:23,729 Oh, my God, I'm so sorry, Lorraine. 993 00:57:23,731 --> 00:57:28,102 Inappropriate, Pete. 994 00:57:29,102 --> 00:57:34,606 Oh, you asshole! We were gonna have babies! 995 00:57:34,608 --> 00:57:36,274 Lots and lots of babies. 996 00:57:36,276 --> 00:57:43,282 Okay. Okay. It's done. Alright. Okay. Okay. Okay. It's done. 997 00:57:43,284 --> 00:57:46,050 She's right. She's right, it's done. It's done. 998 00:57:46,052 --> 00:57:47,885 Sheryl's right. It's done, buddy. 999 00:57:47,887 --> 00:57:49,921 Damn, it's more blood and her hair. 1000 00:57:49,923 --> 00:57:52,624 I hope those aren't pubes. Ugh! 1001 00:57:52,626 --> 00:57:58,863 Okay. Okay. He's gone. He's gone. He's gone. 1002 00:57:58,865 --> 00:58:02,867 Jimmy's gotta be gone. Jimmy... Jimmy... Timmy is gone, right? 1003 00:58:02,869 --> 00:58:06,571 Right? There's no more. There's no more freshly killed people. 1004 00:58:06,573 --> 00:58:11,008 There's no more freshly killed people. That's it. That's it. We 1005 00:58:11,010 --> 00:58:13,010 just gotta walk back to town. 1006 00:58:13,012 --> 00:58:15,046 Are you sure about that? 1007 00:58:15,048 --> 00:58:17,349 EMMETT: I'm back. 1008 00:58:17,351 --> 00:58:20,151 The fuck. 1009 00:58:20,153 --> 00:58:22,155 SHERYL: Split up. 1010 00:58:30,030 --> 00:58:32,033 [DARK DREARY SYNTH] 1011 00:58:35,202 --> 00:58:38,604 I wish I had a weapon or a really big cup of holy water. 1012 00:58:38,606 --> 00:58:43,709 Oh hold on a second. We've been going about this all wrong. 1013 00:58:43,711 --> 00:58:45,744 We can't fight the spirit and win. 1014 00:58:45,746 --> 00:58:48,879 Yeah. Because we don't have a giant cup of holy water, I know. 1015 00:58:48,881 --> 00:58:56,821 No. We need the supernatural to fight the supernatural. 1016 00:58:56,823 --> 00:59:00,124 Yes. Yes. Like King Kong or Godzilla, exactly. 1017 00:59:00,126 --> 00:59:01,359 Or all those ghost clowns 1018 00:59:01,361 --> 00:59:05,030 he killed whose souls are out there. I've read enough scripts 1019 00:59:05,032 --> 00:59:09,001 to know what their souls need is redemption. I'm gonna get them 1020 00:59:09,003 --> 00:59:13,070 to fight for us. There's gotta be like, what, 1021 00:59:13,072 --> 00:59:14,773 12 of them, maybe more? 1022 00:59:14,775 --> 00:59:16,408 And don't forget about that cat. 1023 00:59:16,410 --> 00:59:21,912 Right. And the cat. They all must hate him for what he 1024 00:59:21,914 --> 00:59:30,722 did to them. Hmm. They're gonna take our side. 1025 00:59:30,724 --> 00:59:32,727 [GHASTLY GROANS AND MOANS] 1026 00:59:41,168 --> 00:59:44,372 Ghost clowns? 1027 00:59:49,043 --> 00:59:52,780 Ghostly alternative life style midget clowns? 1028 00:59:58,785 --> 01:00:00,885 I read somewhere that we only use like 10 percent of our brain? Which 1029 01:00:00,887 --> 01:00:02,921 means that we actually have all this psychic ability stored up 1030 01:00:02,923 --> 01:00:07,629 in like the other 70 percent. All I have to do is believe. 1031 01:00:09,430 --> 01:00:14,865 Come to me little people of the night and assist us in the fight 1032 01:00:14,867 --> 01:00:20,407 against the very spirit that put you in the ground. 1033 01:00:22,409 --> 01:00:26,945 [MIDGET LAUGHTER AND CIRCUS MUSIC]] 1034 01:00:26,947 --> 01:00:29,247 You did it, Sheryl, you're psychic. 1035 01:00:29,249 --> 01:00:32,350 You really... you did it! 1036 01:00:32,352 --> 01:00:35,754 Never underestimate the power of positive energy. 1037 01:00:35,756 --> 01:00:38,756 [MIDGET LAUGHTER] 1038 01:00:38,758 --> 01:00:43,794 [MIDGET MUCUS SPLATTER FOLLOWED BY LAUGHTER] 1039 01:00:43,796 --> 01:00:49,800 Oh. Oh. 1040 01:00:49,802 --> 01:00:56,374 Oh, my God. What is it? What is it? Ghost midget ectoplasm? 1041 01:00:56,376 --> 01:00:57,374 [LAUGHTER] 1042 01:00:57,376 --> 01:01:00,144 Bad clowns, very, very bad. 1043 01:01:00,146 --> 01:01:01,146 [LAUGHTER] 1044 01:01:01,148 --> 01:01:03,280 CLOWNS: Boobies! 1045 01:01:03,282 --> 01:01:07,452 Shhh... We don't want the crazy killer outside 1046 01:01:07,454 --> 01:01:11,289 the door to hear us. 1047 01:01:11,291 --> 01:01:13,959 [FOOTSTEPS IN THE HALLWAY] 1048 01:01:13,961 --> 01:01:16,061 [DOOR RATTLE] 1049 01:01:16,063 --> 01:01:20,966 EMMETT: Who's gonna be first? The pussy camera guy? 1050 01:01:20,968 --> 01:01:21,966 PETER: Shit! 1051 01:01:21,968 --> 01:01:25,236 If clowns burst through that door right now... 1052 01:01:25,238 --> 01:01:28,008 Shhhh... 1053 01:01:29,008 --> 01:01:31,012 [WOODEN DOOR CREAKS] 1054 01:01:38,318 --> 01:01:42,323 I'm sorry. I'm just really fucking terrified. 1055 01:01:44,157 --> 01:01:47,291 Do your countdown thing. Do your countdown thing, okay? 1056 01:01:47,293 --> 01:01:49,160 Okay. 1057 01:01:49,162 --> 01:01:50,961 I'll be right back. 1058 01:01:50,963 --> 01:01:53,798 You're leaving me? 1059 01:01:53,800 --> 01:01:58,303 I have to pee really bad. 1060 01:01:58,305 --> 01:02:00,238 Still? 1061 01:02:00,240 --> 01:02:02,407 I kinda got interrupted before. 1062 01:02:02,409 --> 01:02:04,778 Oh. 1063 01:02:07,514 --> 01:02:09,914 Just promise me you'll stay right here, okay? No matter 1064 01:02:09,916 --> 01:02:12,017 what, you stay right here. Just stay right here and I promise 1065 01:02:12,019 --> 01:02:13,251 I'll be back. 1066 01:02:13,253 --> 01:02:14,820 Okay. 1067 01:02:14,822 --> 01:02:18,825 [floor creaks] 1068 01:02:19,959 --> 01:02:24,965 Number six, Mariah Carey "Vision of Love." 1069 01:02:25,365 --> 01:02:28,970 [OMINOUS SOUNDS] 1070 01:02:32,238 --> 01:02:37,475 [Screaming] OW! 1071 01:02:37,477 --> 01:02:41,182 [GRUNTING] 1072 01:02:42,249 --> 01:02:44,352 Ow! Get off my titty! 1073 01:02:44,985 --> 01:02:48,854 Number five, Taylor Swift, "Shake it Off." 1074 01:02:48,856 --> 01:02:50,321 Shake it off. 1075 01:02:50,323 --> 01:02:55,095 [Screaming] 1076 01:02:59,265 --> 01:03:03,336 Number four, Lady Gaga, "Bad Romance." 1077 01:03:03,871 --> 01:03:06,874 I'm gonna fuck your face. 1078 01:03:08,441 --> 01:03:10,144 [PUNCH SOUNDS] 1079 01:03:10,443 --> 01:03:12,410 [GRUNTING] 1080 01:03:12,412 --> 01:03:15,582 [HEAVY BREATHING] 1081 01:03:22,555 --> 01:03:26,561 [CRICKETS] [FLOOR CREAKS] 1082 01:03:27,093 --> 01:03:32,066 [OMINOUS AMBIENCE] 1083 01:03:37,303 --> 01:03:40,974 SHERYL: Oh, God. Oh, my, God, Daniel. 1084 01:03:42,209 --> 01:03:46,247 Oh, God, Daniel. I'm so sorry. 1085 01:03:48,014 --> 01:03:53,019 You told me to stay. You made me promise. 1086 01:03:59,159 --> 01:04:03,164 [CAR SOUNDS OUTSIDE] [WOODEN RATTLING] 1087 01:04:09,102 --> 01:04:13,305 [SPOOKY PARANORMAL SOUNDS] 1088 01:04:13,307 --> 01:04:15,309 Fuck these spirits. 1089 01:04:16,075 --> 01:04:19,112 Oh, I'm gonna avenge you. 1090 01:04:20,280 --> 01:04:24,950 I'm gonna burn this place to the ground. The world will know 1091 01:04:24,952 --> 01:04:29,457 about the sacrifices you made here. Oh, they will. 1092 01:04:30,057 --> 01:04:33,457 Yes, they will. Yes, they will. 1093 01:04:33,459 --> 01:04:37,965 [gasping] [exhales] 1094 01:04:43,202 --> 01:04:46,738 I held my breath for way over a minute that time, Sheryl. 1095 01:04:46,740 --> 01:04:48,039 Way over a minute. 1096 01:04:48,041 --> 01:04:51,408 EMMETT: I am going to shoehorn your 1097 01:04:51,410 --> 01:04:55,416 asshole wide open, motherfucker. 1098 01:04:58,718 --> 01:05:02,720 [GRUNTING AND SCREAMING] 1099 01:05:02,722 --> 01:05:05,927 Get off me! 1100 01:05:12,631 --> 01:05:14,968 [CUCKOO CLOCK GOES OFF] 1101 01:05:17,436 --> 01:05:19,439 PETER: Wait! 1102 01:05:20,740 --> 01:05:22,774 [knocking] 1103 01:05:22,776 --> 01:05:24,979 It's me, Pete. 1104 01:05:26,512 --> 01:05:28,546 We can't risk it. 1105 01:05:28,548 --> 01:05:30,048 Open the door! 1106 01:05:30,050 --> 01:05:31,651 [WIND WHISTLES] 1107 01:05:32,119 --> 01:05:34,084 This is karma for not picking up your dad. 1108 01:05:34,086 --> 01:05:36,254 PETER: What? 1109 01:05:36,256 --> 01:05:38,523 Open the door, please. Open the door. Please open the door. 1110 01:05:38,525 --> 01:05:40,624 Please open the door. [SCREAMING] 1111 01:05:40,626 --> 01:05:44,595 [KNOCKING] Hey. Just, uh, just...- Hey. 1112 01:05:44,597 --> 01:05:45,662 A hallucination. 1113 01:05:45,664 --> 01:05:48,033 Asshole. Fuck you. 1114 01:05:48,035 --> 01:05:48,600 [SCREAMING] 1115 01:05:48,602 --> 01:05:50,438 [THUMP] 1116 01:05:51,771 --> 01:05:56,043 [HYSTERICAL SCREAMING] 1117 01:06:05,452 --> 01:06:07,388 He did just buy us some time. 1118 01:06:13,325 --> 01:06:15,762 [Gagging sounds] 1119 01:06:17,197 --> 01:06:19,696 What the fuck are you doing, pervert? 1120 01:06:19,698 --> 01:06:24,102 Oh, wait. We can't leave him. 1121 01:06:24,104 --> 01:06:26,171 DANIEL: What? You just locked him out. 1122 01:06:26,173 --> 01:06:27,305 I know, I panicked. 1123 01:06:27,307 --> 01:06:30,675 PETER: What are you doing with my nipple? Ah! 1124 01:06:30,677 --> 01:06:32,343 Get off our cameraman! 1125 01:06:32,345 --> 01:06:35,345 DANIEL: You want to grab tits, asshole? Grab this. 1126 01:06:35,347 --> 01:06:36,680 Oh, shit. 1127 01:06:36,682 --> 01:06:39,651 EMMETT: Stronger reflexes in this body. 1128 01:06:39,653 --> 01:06:41,251 DANIEL: Oh, shit! 1129 01:06:41,253 --> 01:06:45,358 EMMETT: No one leaves. SHERYL: Hang on. 1130 01:06:45,791 --> 01:06:47,794 DANIEL: Hurry! Hurry! 1131 01:06:48,727 --> 01:06:50,731 [Screaming] 1132 01:06:53,800 --> 01:06:55,867 DANIEL: Oh, get in! Get in, Pete! Get in! 1133 01:06:55,869 --> 01:06:57,234 SHERYL: Oh, no, you're messing it up! 1134 01:06:57,236 --> 01:06:58,535 PETER: I'm sorry! 1135 01:06:58,537 --> 01:06:59,736 Pete, you gotta get in the circle. 1136 01:06:59,738 --> 01:07:00,671 Ah! 1137 01:07:00,673 --> 01:07:01,738 DANIEL: Get in the circle. 1138 01:07:01,740 --> 01:07:03,408 PETER: You think I don't want to? 1139 01:07:03,410 --> 01:07:06,147 [SCREAMING] 1140 01:07:08,615 --> 01:07:10,849 [RELIEVED LAUGHTER] 1141 01:07:10,851 --> 01:07:13,383 SHERYL: Oh my god. I think it worked. He can't get in. 1142 01:07:13,385 --> 01:07:15,285 DANIEL: Yeah, you can't get in, dickhead. 1143 01:07:15,287 --> 01:07:17,222 [Screaming] 1144 01:07:17,224 --> 01:07:22,063 SHERYL: We're safe inside the circle. We just have to wait it out. 1145 01:07:22,863 --> 01:07:25,265 How long? Two minutes. 1146 01:07:29,869 --> 01:07:30,936 SHERYL: What's he doing? 1147 01:07:30,938 --> 01:07:34,138 DANIEL: I don't know. Sheryl? Sheryl? Sheryl? 1148 01:07:34,140 --> 01:07:34,939 I don't know. 1149 01:07:34,941 --> 01:07:36,744 Sheryl? Sheryl? Sheryl? Sheryl? 1150 01:07:37,744 --> 01:07:41,579 [Screaming] Ah! Ah! Ah! 1151 01:07:41,581 --> 01:07:43,648 Ah! Ah! Ah! 1152 01:07:43,650 --> 01:07:45,653 He's in. 1153 01:07:46,586 --> 01:07:49,723 But not the spirit. See? 1154 01:07:50,157 --> 01:07:54,258 DANIEL: He messed up. He messed up. Yeah, he's messed up. 1155 01:07:54,260 --> 01:07:56,894 There's no more dead bodies for him to slide into. 1156 01:07:56,896 --> 01:08:01,298 [LAUGHING] 1157 01:08:01,300 --> 01:08:04,769 PETER: Quit fooling around dickhead. Your titty twisting days are 1158 01:08:04,771 --> 01:08:06,570 done. 1159 01:08:06,572 --> 01:08:10,575 [FOOTSTEPS] 1160 01:08:10,577 --> 01:08:12,644 [DOOR RATTLING] 1161 01:08:12,646 --> 01:08:14,314 Oh, God. 1162 01:08:16,816 --> 01:08:19,385 Who's that? 1163 01:08:27,928 --> 01:08:30,131 [GASPING AS DOOR CREAKS OPEN] 1164 01:08:36,803 --> 01:08:38,671 I didn't get paid. 1165 01:08:39,738 --> 01:08:43,373 PETER: Where did you come from? 1166 01:08:43,375 --> 01:08:47,313 I came in a few minutes ago to check up on y'all. 1167 01:08:48,314 --> 01:08:52,382 Had some chest pains. 1168 01:08:52,384 --> 01:08:55,619 DANIEL: Victim Stan, we don't have a ride back to town, sir. 1169 01:08:55,621 --> 01:09:00,291 Would you mind giving us a lift? 1170 01:09:00,293 --> 01:09:02,694 Hmm. Not at all. 1171 01:09:02,696 --> 01:09:07,966 Yeah. And also, there might have been a few unexplained deaths on 1172 01:09:07,968 --> 01:09:11,235 and about the premises. 1173 01:09:11,237 --> 01:09:14,275 Oh. You don't say. 1174 01:09:16,476 --> 01:09:21,514 Maybe we can get the murder tours going again. 1175 01:09:22,514 --> 01:09:23,513 Yeah, maybe. 1176 01:09:23,515 --> 01:09:26,586 If it works out in your favor, why not, sir? 1177 01:09:44,004 --> 01:09:48,209 And Stan, about your cat, sir, um- 1178 01:09:48,707 --> 01:09:50,842 How do I put it? 1179 01:09:50,844 --> 01:09:51,842 PETER: Pretty dead. 1180 01:09:51,844 --> 01:09:53,477 DANIEL: Yeah. 1181 01:09:53,479 --> 01:09:55,480 SHERYL: Yeah. 1182 01:09:55,482 --> 01:09:57,484 Sorry. 1183 01:09:57,983 --> 01:10:02,386 And it's such a shame about Fluffy because he was such 1184 01:10:02,388 --> 01:10:05,793 a kind, warm-spirited kitten. 1185 01:10:08,428 --> 01:10:10,328 Yeah. 1186 01:10:10,330 --> 01:10:15,336 Fluffy, yeah. Damn fine kitty. 1187 01:10:18,304 --> 01:10:23,309 How are we gonna explain this to the police? 1188 01:10:24,611 --> 01:10:28,078 You don't intend on letting us get to the police, 1189 01:10:28,080 --> 01:10:31,048 do you, Jimmy? 1190 01:10:31,050 --> 01:10:35,289 [maniacal laughing] 1191 01:10:39,893 --> 01:10:42,726 What gave me away? 1192 01:10:42,728 --> 01:10:45,932 The kitten's name was Mittens, not Fluffy. 1193 01:10:46,732 --> 01:10:49,766 And, uh, Stan really loved his pussy. 1194 01:10:49,768 --> 01:10:54,338 Let me tell you a little story about your friend, Stan. 1195 01:10:54,340 --> 01:11:01,347 When saw his dead little pussy, he had himself a heart attack 1196 01:11:01,781 --> 01:11:04,785 Fell out right there. 1197 01:11:07,487 --> 01:11:12,760 I saw an in, and I took it. 1198 01:11:15,661 --> 01:11:17,861 You two would make really good investigators in 1199 01:11:17,863 --> 01:11:19,529 real life. Just saying. 1200 01:11:19,531 --> 01:11:21,534 STAN: Shut up! 1201 01:11:22,434 --> 01:11:26,740 It's time to pick up where I- 1202 01:11:28,040 --> 01:11:29,407 [GUN CLICKS] 1203 01:11:29,409 --> 01:11:31,612 left off. 1204 01:11:35,548 --> 01:11:39,353 Get your asses outside! Now! 1205 01:11:39,952 --> 01:11:43,956 I said, move. Look tits. 1206 01:11:44,790 --> 01:11:47,327 Get outside. Get out there! Turn around. 1207 01:11:48,894 --> 01:11:51,962 Keep it moving. Don't look at me! Follow him. 1208 01:11:51,964 --> 01:11:54,632 Hands on his shoulders. Get in line. 1209 01:11:54,634 --> 01:11:56,370 [CRICKETS] 1210 01:11:58,405 --> 01:11:59,471 SHERYL: Ahh! 1211 01:11:59,473 --> 01:12:03,410 PETE: Okay. Okay, okay, okay. STAN: Get over there. 1212 01:12:06,745 --> 01:12:08,078 STAN: What's the matter? 1213 01:12:08,080 --> 01:12:10,948 ♪ EVIL MUSIC ♪ 1214 01:12:10,950 --> 01:12:14,185 [MUMBLING] 1215 01:12:14,187 --> 01:12:17,555 PETER: Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh. 1216 01:12:17,557 --> 01:12:19,559 STAN: Get your asses down those stairs. 1217 01:12:21,494 --> 01:12:24,798 I said now! Get! 1218 01:12:31,170 --> 01:12:32,169 Are you sure... 1219 01:12:32,171 --> 01:12:34,441 STAN: Down! DANIEL: Okay. 1220 01:12:38,445 --> 01:12:44,718 ♪ PARANORMAL X-FILES MUSIC ♪ 1221 01:12:46,820 --> 01:12:51,525 Maybe we should settle this over a game of flashlight tag. 1222 01:12:54,661 --> 01:12:59,433 SHERYL: Oh, yeah. I used to love that game. Didn't you, Pete? 1223 01:13:00,900 --> 01:13:02,934 This isn't really the time to reminisce. 1224 01:13:02,936 --> 01:13:07,137 Pete, wouldn't you like to play a game of 1225 01:13:07,139 --> 01:13:11,711 flashlight tag with him? With your flashlight? 1226 01:13:14,179 --> 01:13:16,146 Right now. 1227 01:13:16,148 --> 01:13:20,887 Yes. I would love to play flashlight tag, 1228 01:13:23,555 --> 01:13:25,659 as long as I'm not it. Ah! 1229 01:13:27,693 --> 01:13:30,696 SHERYL: Those damn energy drinks. 1230 01:13:32,232 --> 01:13:35,602 Move. 1231 01:13:42,040 --> 01:13:43,576 Oh! 1232 01:13:49,682 --> 01:13:51,751 Move. 1233 01:14:01,160 --> 01:14:04,962 SHERYL: Wasn't there a time limit to being in this world? 1234 01:14:04,964 --> 01:14:09,033 STAN: You botched the ritual earlier. There are no time 1235 01:14:09,035 --> 01:14:11,905 restraints anymore. 1236 01:14:13,772 --> 01:14:16,140 DANIEL: Where you taking us, Jimmy? 1237 01:14:16,142 --> 01:14:20,147 STAN: To where I bury the bodies. 1238 01:14:21,580 --> 01:14:22,748 [EERIE WINDY AMBIENCE] 1239 01:14:23,883 --> 01:14:26,249 SHERYL: You want us to see for ourselves, don't you? 1240 01:14:26,251 --> 01:14:28,718 You're wracked with guilt, and if you take us to the spot, 1241 01:14:28,720 --> 01:14:31,724 you'll feel some sense of closure, right? 1242 01:14:33,192 --> 01:14:36,726 There is no motive other than I intend 1243 01:14:36,728 --> 01:14:40,133 to cut your eyes out and slice out your tongue. 1244 01:14:44,137 --> 01:14:47,038 Can't you just shoot just like you did Pete? 1245 01:14:47,040 --> 01:14:51,545 Don't worry, I'll be entering him soon enough. 1246 01:14:52,844 --> 01:14:54,678 DANIEL: Uh, for the record, that means, uh... 1247 01:14:54,680 --> 01:14:57,584 STAN: Turn around. 1248 01:15:02,254 --> 01:15:04,590 On your knees. 1249 01:15:06,992 --> 01:15:08,695 [laughing] 1250 01:15:09,896 --> 01:15:12,730 I got an idea. Let's start with your mouth 1251 01:15:12,732 --> 01:15:16,202 first because it's so pretty. 1252 01:15:17,269 --> 01:15:20,904 Um, are you thinking the knife or the gun? 1253 01:15:20,906 --> 01:15:24,175 Because I have a severe phobia to both of those. 1254 01:15:24,177 --> 01:15:27,611 I can't let evil win. I can't let evil win. I have to believe. 1255 01:15:27,613 --> 01:15:29,346 I have to believe. I do believe. 1256 01:15:29,348 --> 01:15:31,015 I really don't like anything in my mouth. 1257 01:15:31,017 --> 01:15:34,185 I command all you restless spirits to come to 1258 01:15:34,187 --> 01:15:38,088 the aid of me and my friend. Come to us now and protect us 1259 01:15:38,090 --> 01:15:42,195 against this demon-infested fiend. [GUST OF WIND] 1260 01:15:43,629 --> 01:15:45,096 STAN: What are you doing? 1261 01:15:45,098 --> 01:15:46,830 It's working, Sheryl. It's working. You're talking to 1262 01:15:46,832 --> 01:15:47,698 the dead. Keep going. 1263 01:15:47,700 --> 01:15:48,932 That's enough out of you! 1264 01:15:48,934 --> 01:15:51,901 SHERYL: Come to us now. Come and take away the evil that 1265 01:15:51,903 --> 01:15:54,939 has taken your souls and wants to take more. 1266 01:15:54,941 --> 01:15:56,039 [GUST OF WIND] 1267 01:15:56,041 --> 01:15:58,376 Ah! [CROWS GAWKING] 1268 01:15:58,378 --> 01:15:59,577 Get away. 1269 01:15:59,579 --> 01:16:04,949 Come now. It is time for your redemption. It is time for you 1270 01:16:04,951 --> 01:16:07,621 to take your revenge. 1271 01:16:12,125 --> 01:16:16,930 [FAINT LAUGHTER] No! No! Ah! 1272 01:16:19,698 --> 01:16:23,970 NO! OH! OH! [INTENSIFIED LAUGHTER] 1273 01:16:25,838 --> 01:16:26,872 [ZAP] 1274 01:16:28,974 --> 01:16:31,044 DANIEL: Holy shit! 1275 01:16:31,244 --> 01:16:33,246 Holy shit, Sheryl, you did it! 1276 01:16:35,048 --> 01:16:37,050 You did it! 1277 01:16:38,918 --> 01:16:42,054 SHERYL: Oh, oh, my God. 1278 01:16:44,089 --> 01:16:47,425 That's the power of positive energy. 1279 01:16:47,427 --> 01:16:51,962 Let's figure out how to get the hell out of here. 1280 01:16:51,964 --> 01:16:55,969 SHERYL: Oh, Stan's car! Maybe there's keys in it. 1281 01:16:56,469 --> 01:17:01,274 PETER: Hey! You guys were gonna leave me? 1282 01:17:03,108 --> 01:17:05,646 SHERYL: Our bad. 1283 01:17:05,844 --> 01:17:07,847 Shotgun. 1284 01:17:10,383 --> 01:17:11,351 My camera. 1285 01:17:12,117 --> 01:17:16,052 Hey, I gotta get my camera. Hey, don't leave me! 1286 01:17:16,054 --> 01:17:20,860 I'm fucking serious. Don't fucking Leave me here. 1287 01:17:21,393 --> 01:17:25,398 [DRAMATIC SOUND EFFECT] 1288 01:17:26,398 --> 01:17:28,401 Go! Go! 1289 01:17:29,469 --> 01:17:30,668 So what happened? 1290 01:17:30,670 --> 01:17:33,002 Oh, Sheryl was great. She was great. She used her psychic 1291 01:17:33,004 --> 01:17:34,805 powers and she summoned the supernatural. 1292 01:17:34,807 --> 01:17:35,972 What? 1293 01:17:35,974 --> 01:17:38,476 Let's just say we had a little help from the other side. 1294 01:17:38,478 --> 01:17:40,410 Lorraine was there for us. 1295 01:17:40,412 --> 01:17:42,413 What, really? 1296 01:17:42,415 --> 01:17:45,916 Oh, wow. How did she look? 1297 01:17:45,918 --> 01:17:47,752 Inappropriate, Pete. 1298 01:17:47,754 --> 01:17:52,291 What, I'm... I'm... I'm sorry, okay? I liked her. 1299 01:17:53,058 --> 01:17:54,324 There, I said it. 1300 01:17:54,326 --> 01:17:56,329 I know. 1301 01:17:58,130 --> 01:18:01,901 Uh, weren't the house lights on a second ago? 1302 01:18:02,168 --> 01:18:06,173 ♪ SUSPICIOUS MUSIC ♪ 1303 01:18:07,939 --> 01:18:10,141 You always have to notice everything, Pete. 1304 01:18:10,143 --> 01:18:13,377 Yeah. Can you just stop recording for like a minute just 1305 01:18:13,379 --> 01:18:15,779 so we can, you know, get out of here? 1306 01:18:15,781 --> 01:18:16,780 Yeah. 1307 01:18:16,782 --> 01:18:19,318 PETER: Uh, not yet. Look. 1308 01:18:22,321 --> 01:18:24,053 DANIEL: Oh, what the hell? 1309 01:18:24,055 --> 01:18:29,062 [ENGINE REVVING] 1310 01:18:33,131 --> 01:18:35,132 [BRAKES SQUEAL] 1311 01:18:35,134 --> 01:18:37,434 DANIEL: Hell yes. Hell yes! 1312 01:18:37,436 --> 01:18:42,742 Yeah. You got that zombie cat. 1313 01:18:43,041 --> 01:18:46,780 Actually, no. That was just a regular cat. 1314 01:18:47,446 --> 01:18:52,048 You guys didn't notice the different color or that it was a 1315 01:18:52,050 --> 01:18:55,351 little bit bigger, and that it wasn't all bloody and half 1316 01:18:55,353 --> 01:18:57,356 mangled? 1317 01:18:57,589 --> 01:18:59,925 [CRICKETS] 1318 01:19:03,196 --> 01:19:07,200 ♪ UPBEAT CHEERFUL MUSIC ♪ 1319 01:19:08,233 --> 01:19:10,133 SHERYL: I got service. 1320 01:19:10,135 --> 01:19:15,338 PETER: Yes! 911 right now. Tell them we're coming in hot. Gunshot. 1321 01:19:15,340 --> 01:19:16,343 Male. 1322 01:19:16,576 --> 01:19:19,510 ♪ MUSIC CONTINUES ♪ 1323 01:19:19,512 --> 01:19:24,183 I got our next show for the network right here. Aw yeah! 1324 01:19:26,184 --> 01:19:30,287 Beat me with a broomstick. We are gonna be famous. 1325 01:19:30,289 --> 01:19:32,358 ♪ MUSIC CONTINUES ♪ 1326 01:19:33,259 --> 01:19:37,030 [SCREAMING] 1327 01:19:42,101 --> 01:19:46,106 ♪ SPOOKY PIANO MUSIC ♪ 1328 01:19:46,108 --> 01:19:51,108 Subtitles by explosiveskull