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Farid Morocco

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Thank you. Uh, I'll be reading an excerpt from

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my first novel.

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Sorry.

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Oh, shit.

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Mr. David.

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Hey.

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You're having a nightmare.

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You okay?

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Yeah, yeah.

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-Okay. -I'm sorry.

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That's okay.

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That's really good.

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Yeah. I know. I'm married to J.M.

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I didn't know he was gay.

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He's not-- I mean, she's not. She's a... She's a woman.

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And she's my wife.

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I thought... I'm sorry. I thought that J.M.

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was a man's name.

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No. It's... The J is Jennifer.

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Uh, you know, if you look in the back of the book jacket, there's a...

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photo there.

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I-I had a Kindle version. So I didn't...

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Um, I should go get a seat.

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Right.

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Congratulations.

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Thank you.

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-Hi. -Hey.

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So good to see you. Hey, I brought you something.

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Uh, can you hold on to that?

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-Yeah. -Um, my publishe's here.

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-Let me introduce you. -All right.

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Hi. I'm sorry to interrupt.

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I wanted to introduce you to my husband.

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David Warwik. He's also a writer.

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My condolences.

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This is my wife, Lily.

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Two writers, one marriage.

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That must be quite the adventure.

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How do you manage those imaginations?

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-Oh, it's fine. We were just... -Prozac.

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Uh, why don't you tell them about your work, David?

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Sure. I'm making a transition from

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short stories to my first novel.

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Um, David had a piece in The New Yorker about the man with HPV.

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I didn't know that men could get HPV.

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Oh, yes. It's very common.

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-What are it's symptoms? -Warts.

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That's terrible.

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Do you have HPV, David?

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No, no. No, no. It's just a work of fiction.

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It's not... It's not about me.

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I mean, you're not the first person though,

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to assume that I have genital warts.

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Um, David is writing a book that is just exquisite.

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It's a... It's a coming-of-age tale,

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sort of, semi autobiographical--

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-Hi. -We're about to start, J.M., so...

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-Okay. Great. -We should go take our seats.

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Great. Great.

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Very nice to meet you.

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Yeah, if you could please help me in welcoming

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the head of Fallon Fremont press,

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Bernard Geist.

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Thank you.

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It is my pleasure to be here tonight to introduce to you

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one of the most exciting and innovative young author's of our time.

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Her latest work is

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unique, fascinating, and seductive.

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Please welcome J.M. Lee.

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Hello. Thank you, Bernard, for such a beautiful introduction.

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I'm going to be reading an excerpt

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from the first chapter of my book,

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Blind Hearts.

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"It had been the longest night of the year.

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It was one of those nights when the dawn never seemed to come.

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It was almost..."

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-Ready to go? -Yeah.

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Oh, hey. I stole a bottle of wine. Check it out.

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My God. Why do you do that?

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You always do that. It's so weird.

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They're not gonna miss it. Come on, you got it.

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Well, that was wonderful.

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I can't wait to read the new book.

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Oh, thank you. Thank you so much.

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Uh, Jennifer, did you get the invitation to our salon tomorrow night?

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I'm so sorry. But I have this deadline

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and I just doubt that I'm gonna make it.

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Your'e my newest author, I insist you come.

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Oh, no. We invite all our favorite artists.

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You have to come and read your work.

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-David, you should read something too. -Huh?

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Well, it's settled then.

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-We'll see you tomorrow. -Okay. See you tomorrow.

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What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you drunk?

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-Hey. -Hey.

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-Rock star. -Oh, God.

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-Great job tonight. -Thank you. Thanks.

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-You're like your own muse. -Oh, my God.

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David, do you remember Jordan, my agent?

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Of course. Hey, man, how's it going?

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Hey. So, Jenny, you know Sawyer?

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Yes. Hi. It's so nice to meet you.

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You too. When you're done with Jordan, you should call me.

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-Oh, God. -Maybe I will.

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All right. well. We got to head out.

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-Okay. Yeah. -But you...

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You keep on living the way you love.

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All right? And love the way you live, because it looks good.

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-Hell, yeah, man. -Is that a Maroon 5 lyric?

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-Oh, yeah. Okay. -We'll see you soon, guys.

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That was Sawyer Edwards.

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She's, like, huge.

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Big time lit agent.

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I think she's bipolar though.

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She tried to light people on fire at this writer's retreat.

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I didn't get the vibe, though, did you?

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No.

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-You were great tonight. -Oh, thank you.

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Your agent's an asshole.

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-Ugh! No, he's not. -He treats me like I'm invisible.

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David, you need to learn how to play the game a little.

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You know, no publisher's gonna wanna read your book

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if you don't have an agent and they've never met you before.

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I don't wanna play a game. I just wanna work.

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I guess all I wanna do... I just wanna write.

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Why can't I just do that?

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Because networking is part of the work.

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You know what I mean?

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-Look-- -It just is.

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Look, I'm not a schmoozer, okay?

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I don't want to schmooze to get somebody to read me.

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I mean, that's not what being what a writer is.

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Was T.S. Elliot a schmoozer?

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T.S. Elliot? T.S. Elliot was a Nazi sympathizer.

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Okay, so he was a schmoozer of a different kind.

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-Yeah. -Like James Baldwin?

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Uh-huh. James Baldwin was a room mate of Marlon Brando.

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So he didn't need to schmooze.

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Look, just read a little bit from your book tomorrow at the salon

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and it will be a chance for Bernard to hear your work.

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I can't. You have your deadline. I can't go do to that by myself.

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No. It's fine. I'll rent a car and I'll blow off the deadline on it.

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As long as you promise to read a little bit and just...

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Just... No more, just a little bit.

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-And don't be weird. Don't steal wine. -I won't.

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-Promise? -I promise?

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I won't be weird.

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You're making that face though.

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No, I won't. I won't.

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You're gonna be weird. You're gonna be weird.

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I'm not. I'm not. Thank you.

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-I won't be weird. -Mm-hmm.

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Any interest in a quickie?

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David! Let's go!

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Can you grab the snacks and the wine on the counter?

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Yeah.

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Want me to get you a pen so you can sign her book?

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Can't believe we had to come all the way out to Queens just to get a car.

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I know. There are no cars by us.

161
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It's fine. We're just gonna transfer here and it's like three stops away.

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We've Uber-ed here to get to a car.

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Where's the wine?

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In the bag.

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No. No, no. No. The Pellegrin is in the bag.

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Shit.

167
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Look. we'll just pick up some wine.

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We'll find a wine shop and pick up some wine.

169
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But we're so late. Give me your phone. I'll find a wine shop.

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You should really get your own phone at this point.

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I'm... David, I'm never getting my own phone.

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Never.

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Um...

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Hello.

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-Hello. -Hi.

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Hi. I rented a car. The Honda?

177
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Um...

178
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Yeah. That's not here. Sorry.

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What do you mean?

180
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I reserved it.

181
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Oh, yeah. I mean, the other person didn't bring it back yet though. So...

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Okay.

183
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Uh, we'll share.

184
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Is there, I don't know, a different car that we can take?

185
00:12:00,718 --> 00:12:02,969
No. Sorry.

186
00:12:03,844 --> 00:12:06,098
You called me wheel chair?

187
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No. I called you we'll share.

188
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Okay, what are we @supposed to do?

189
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-Oh, it's wheel share. So it's a car sharing service. -Uh-huh.

190
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So you have to wait for the, uh, last person to bring the car back.

191
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Yeah, when are they coming back?

192
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Oh, I don't know.

193
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You don't know?

194
00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:24,078
Jen, it will be all right. whoever's got the car right now,

195
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they're getting fined for being late.

196
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-Hi. -Hi.

197
00:12:30,377 --> 00:12:31,754
Okay, so there's a package in my car that says bees on it.

198
00:12:33,004 --> 00:12:35,007
Does it say live bees?

199
00:12:36,593 --> 00:12:38,219
No. Just says bees.

200
00:12:38,969 --> 00:12:40,931
Then you're fine.

201
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:46,562
I can't believe this. Can I-- Can I use your phone?

202
00:12:46,562 --> 00:12:49,357
Sure. I mean, they're gonna be here soon. It'll be fine.

203
00:12:50,191 --> 00:12:52,319
Here.

204
00:12:54,446 --> 00:12:57,784
-I'm gonna call them. -It'll be okay. Just--

205
00:12:57,784 --> 00:12:59,953
That's a nice beard, man.

206
00:13:01,204 --> 00:13:03,541
-What's that? -That's a nice beard.

207
00:13:03,541 --> 00:13:05,418
-Thank you. -Yeah.

208
00:13:06,918 --> 00:13:08,255
Yeah.

209
00:13:08,255 --> 00:13:09,631
How long have you been growing that wild cat?

210
00:13:09,631 --> 00:13:12,300
Uh, you know, six, seven months.

211
00:13:14,262 --> 00:13:15,847
Yours is nice too.

212
00:13:17,766 --> 00:13:19,933
Thanks, bro. Two years.

213
00:13:19,933 --> 00:13:21,311
Don't regret it any single day.

214
00:13:21,311 --> 00:13:24,022
Nice. That's good.

215
00:13:24,022 --> 00:13:25,940
Perfect. Perfect beard.

216
00:13:25,940 --> 00:13:28,194
Okay, I'll hold, 'cause I'm not late.

217
00:13:28,194 --> 00:13:30,946
I'm not late or anything.

218
00:13:30,946 --> 00:13:33,117
You put stuff in it.

219
00:13:33,117 --> 00:13:34,618
You know, occasionally, like, shampoo.

220
00:13:34,618 --> 00:13:37,873
You got to be crazy.

221
00:13:37,873 --> 00:13:38,956
Occasional champagne in this one.

222
00:13:38,956 --> 00:13:40,958
You know what I mean?

223
00:13:40,958 --> 00:13:41,959
Sure, yeah.

224
00:13:41,959 --> 00:13:43,463
I-F-E-R, Jennifer. Jennifer, as in Jennifer, Jennifer?

225
00:13:43,962 --> 00:13:47,966
-Yeah. -You live out here or you commute?

226
00:13:47,966 --> 00:13:50,969
Live right there. That's my dog Lou.

227
00:13:51,263 --> 00:13:55,225
-And that's your car. -You know what, forget it.

228
00:13:55,225 --> 00:13:57,978
It's here. Yeah, thank you for your help.

229
00:13:57,978 --> 00:13:59,980
This is crazy.

230
00:13:59,980 --> 00:14:01,859
Hi. The whole point of a car sharing program, is the sharing. You know.

231
00:14:09,992 --> 00:14:11,704
Sorry, sorry. I'm so sorry.

232
00:14:12,914 --> 00:14:14,665
Let's get you in the car, huh.

233
00:14:16,417 --> 00:14:18,419
Fine. There you go. Watch your head. Watch your head, come on.

234
00:14:31,685 --> 00:14:35,523
I'm Colleen Thorndyke,

235
00:14:35,523 --> 00:14:37,023
and we're here today with author J.M. Lee

236
00:14:37,023 --> 00:14:39,319
discussing her new book, Blind Hearts.

237
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So, tell me, J.M., how did youcome up with the charactersof this novel.

238
00:14:41,656 --> 00:14:44,909
[Jennifer]Well, Colleen this is one of the most personal novels I've ever written.

239
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And it's about a marriage. The story is a metaphor,

240
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and I guess I really wouldn't want to say much more than that.

241
00:14:53,502 --> 00:14:57,215
[woman on radio] You know,rare that a novelist surpassesa heralded debut novel

242
00:14:57,215 --> 00:15:00,844
with one that's even more accomplished and finely nuanced.

243
00:15:00,844 --> 00:15:04,055
And you wrote this so quickly.How did you do it?

244
00:15:04,055 --> 00:15:06,977
I just do the work.

245
00:15:06,977 --> 00:15:08,812
When you put in the time, you're bound to come up with something.

246
00:15:08,812 --> 00:15:12,650
I guess you can say I'm very disciplined about my writing.

247
00:15:14,485 --> 00:15:15,904
Did you bring your manuscript?

248
00:15:18,281 --> 00:15:19,825
-What's that? -Did you bring your manuscript?

249
00:15:19,825 --> 00:15:23,830
You know what, I'm not gonna read anything. It's fine.

250
00:15:23,830 --> 00:15:26,624
David, no. What?

251
00:15:26,624 --> 00:15:28,919
The whole point of all of this, was... it's supposed to be an opportunity for you.

252
00:15:30,253 --> 00:15:34,090
I do not need to go to this thing.

253
00:15:34,090 --> 00:15:35,426
I could have been home, writing.

254
00:15:35,426 --> 00:15:37,220
Why didn't you bring it?

255
00:15:37,220 --> 00:15:39,723
I couldn't find a passage I liked.

256
00:15:39,723 --> 00:15:41,141
I read the whole thing and it was just like...

257
00:15:41,141 --> 00:15:42,768
The whole thing's crap. It just needs...

258
00:15:42,768 --> 00:15:44,520
It needs a massive rewriting.

259
00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:46,188
Just need like another month with it.

260
00:15:46,188 --> 00:15:48,106
David, another month?

261
00:15:48,106 --> 00:15:49,610
You've written a whole book. A whole book full of passages.

262
00:15:50,444 --> 00:15:54,449
It's... I'm sure you can find one passage to read.

263
00:15:54,616 --> 00:15:59,038
Oh, oh, oh. You know what? You've emailed me a copy of your script.

264
00:15:59,245 --> 00:16:02,959
You can read it off my iPad.

265
00:16:02,959 --> 00:16:04,794
It's fine. I don't need to read anything. It will be fine.

266
00:16:04,794 --> 00:16:07,297
Okay, I'm sorry. What's going on?

267
00:16:08,130 --> 00:16:11,719
Is this like self-sabotage here or like...

268
00:16:11,719 --> 00:16:14,890
Maybe it wouldn't seem that way if my brilliant wife would actually do me a favor

269
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:18,935
and read what I've written, and may be provide some constructive criticism,

270
00:16:18,935 --> 00:16:23,107
then I wouldn't feel so weird showing it to your publisher.

271
00:16:23,107 --> 00:16:26,028
Look, I'm just under a tremendous amount of pressure

272
00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:28,153
and I can't leave the world of my book to enter the world of your book.

273
00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,658
It'd take weeks to get back to it.

274
00:16:30,658 --> 00:16:32,826
How come whenever I ask for something, there's a world you can't leave

275
00:16:32,826 --> 00:16:35,789
or there's an interview that you have to prepare for.

276
00:16:35,789 --> 00:16:38,708
I mean, do you even like my work?

277
00:16:38,708 --> 00:16:40,167
Of course, I like your work.

278
00:16:40,167 --> 00:16:42,505
What do you think I'm doing right now?

279
00:16:42,505 --> 00:16:44,091
I'm supporting you and your work.

280
00:16:44,173 --> 00:16:45,591
I just wish sometimes

281
00:16:47,761 --> 00:16:50,014
you could try a little bit harder with people.

282
00:16:50,014 --> 00:16:52,767
Like when they look at you at a party,

283
00:16:52,767 --> 00:16:54,477
you look like you're dead inside.

284
00:16:54,477 --> 00:16:56,396
You know what, maybe I wouldn't seem like I was dying

285
00:16:56,396 --> 00:16:59,315
if, you know, maybe we had sex every once in a while.

286
00:17:04,823 --> 00:17:08,200
We have sex.

287
00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:09,618
Barely.

288
00:17:15,794 --> 00:17:19,213
-Pull over. -What?

289
00:17:19,213 --> 00:17:21,050
Pull over. Just do it.

290
00:17:21,050 --> 00:17:23,803
-Right here. Just pull over. -All right.

291
00:17:23,803 --> 00:17:25,512
All right. I'm doing it. I'm doing it.

292
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:28,223
Don't yell at me. What are you doing?

293
00:17:28,223 --> 00:17:31,019
You want sex? We're doing sex.

294
00:17:31,019 --> 00:17:32,228
-What? Right here? No-- -Yeah.

295
00:17:32,228 --> 00:17:34,273
This is a rental car. Jen, we don't know who's been in here.

296
00:17:34,733 --> 00:17:38,235
Ow, ow, that's my hand.

297
00:17:40,948 --> 00:17:43,701
Oh, snap.

298
00:17:49,791 --> 00:17:53,252
My jacket. It's stuck.

299
00:18:04,433 --> 00:18:06,394
Hi, there. You roll down your window please?

300
00:18:06,394 --> 00:18:09,271
What's going on here? Roll down the window.

301
00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:12,026
You guys lost?

302
00:18:14,821 --> 00:18:16,865
Yes, yes. We're-- We're lost. We just--

303
00:18:16,865 --> 00:18:20,368
We just stopped to look at the map.

304
00:18:20,368 --> 00:18:22,914
Uh, guys,

305
00:18:22,914 --> 00:18:26,919
we know you were having sex. It was, uh, pretty obvious. -No, no. We weren't having sex. -Are we in trouble?

306
00:18:27,293 --> 00:18:30,923
Well, here's the thing.

307
00:18:30,923 --> 00:18:32,842
The glass in your car, it's completely see through.

308
00:18:32,842 --> 00:18:36,303
-Transparent. -Yeah.

309
00:18:36,303 --> 00:18:37,597
That means that anybody driving by on this highway

310
00:18:37,597 --> 00:18:39,516
can see inside, and they can see what's going on.

311
00:18:39,516 --> 00:18:41,602
-Everything. -It's called indecent exposure.

312
00:18:41,602 --> 00:18:44,605
-Oh, God. -And that's a crime.

313
00:18:44,605 --> 00:18:46,066
Normally we get that with high school kids,

314
00:18:46,066 --> 00:18:47,984
but you guys seem a little mature for that.

315
00:18:47,984 --> 00:18:50,863
I don't have a PH.D, But I'm thinking maybe on some level

316
00:18:50,863 --> 00:18:54,617
you guys wanna get caught in the act for something like that?

317
00:18:54,617 --> 00:18:56,661
-What? No. -No, no. No, no.

318
00:18:56,661 --> 00:18:58,914
-Is that what this is? -You want us to watch you?

319
00:18:58,914 --> 00:19:00,707
-No, no, no, no. -What?

320
00:19:00,707 --> 00:19:02,709
'Cause if that's what you want,

321
00:19:02,709 --> 00:19:05,255
we can watch you.

322
00:19:05,255 --> 00:19:06,798
-No, thanks. -No, no. We are incredibly private people.

323
00:19:06,798 --> 00:19:09,134
We are so--

324
00:19:09,134 --> 00:19:10,594
So private, I don't even like to pee in front of him, you know.

325
00:19:10,594 --> 00:19:13,347
Can I see some identification, please?

326
00:19:13,347 --> 00:19:15,225
Sure, sure, sure.

327
00:19:15,225 --> 00:19:16,852
Thank you.

328
00:19:17,978 --> 00:19:20,355
Different last names. Surprise, surprise.

329
00:19:20,355 --> 00:19:23,358
All right. So we're married, we're just not married to each other.

330
00:19:23,358 --> 00:19:26,487
Oh, no. We're married to each other.

331
00:19:26,487 --> 00:19:27,614
-Yeah. -I just kept my last name.

332
00:19:27,614 --> 00:19:29,616
-For work. I'm a writer. -Please, Ma'am.

333
00:19:29,616 --> 00:19:32,871
Normally, for this kind of thing, we got to give a summons. But, uh...

334
00:19:34,038 --> 00:19:36,499
I don't know. What do you think, partner?

335
00:19:37,877 --> 00:19:41,005
-Well, I don't know. -We'll let them off with a warning, or...

336
00:19:41,005 --> 00:19:43,591
-These guys... -So sorry.

337
00:19:43,591 --> 00:19:47,386
-Yeah, we can let them off with a warning. -Yeah, all right.

338
00:19:47,386 --> 00:19:50,389
-Thank you. -Stay out of trouble.

339
00:19:50,389 --> 00:19:51,726
-Transparent windows. -Thank you, Officer.

340
00:19:57,941 --> 00:20:01,821
-That was so horrible. -That was so terrible.

341
00:20:01,821 --> 00:20:04,991
-Let's never do that again. No. -So not worth it.

342
00:20:09,330 --> 00:20:12,415
Ugh!

343
00:20:12,415 --> 00:20:14,127
-Oh, David! -I'm sorry.

344
00:20:14,127 --> 00:20:16,171
-Are you serious? Come on. -I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

345
00:20:16,171 --> 00:20:19,342
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

346
00:20:19,342 --> 00:20:20,843
-It's really bad. It's really, really bad. -I had some ice cream.

347
00:20:20,843 --> 00:20:23,554
-It's not funny. -I had some ice cream.

348
00:20:23,554 --> 00:20:26,266
Oh, my God. Oh!

349
00:20:26,266 --> 00:20:28,518
Oh, no!

350
00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:30,646
It's passed. It's fine.

351
00:20:30,646 --> 00:20:33,439
-Ugh. Is it safe? -It's fine.

352
00:20:33,439 --> 00:20:36,070
-It's passed. It's passed. -Close the windows.

353
00:20:36,070 --> 00:20:39,446
Hey, we still need to pick up wine.

354
00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:41,242
There it is. Okay. I'm gonna take five seconds, okay?

355
00:20:43,870 --> 00:20:47,456
-All right. -Yes. This is amazing.

356
00:20:47,624 --> 00:20:50,002
Whoo-hoo!

357
00:20:53,089 --> 00:20:56,301
No!

358
00:20:56,301 --> 00:20:58,469
-No! No! -What's the problem?

359
00:20:58,887 --> 00:21:02,392
Shit. It's closed.

360
00:21:02,392 --> 00:21:05,312
Well, check the phone. See if there are any other places nearby.

361
00:21:05,312 --> 00:21:08,480
Oh, no, no. They're all closed.

362
00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:10,818
-That's impossible. -They're all closed.

363
00:21:10,818 --> 00:21:12,486
I'm just saying expand the map a little bit.

364
00:21:12,486 --> 00:21:14,322
I've expanded the map.

365
00:21:14,322 --> 00:21:16,116
-Excuse me, ma'am. Hi. -Hi.

366
00:21:17,659 --> 00:21:19,912
We're trying to stop here to get some wine. It appears to be closed.

367
00:21:19,912 --> 00:21:22,497
And we looked around

368
00:21:22,497 --> 00:21:24,209
and few other places in the area seems to be closed as well.

369
00:21:24,209 --> 00:21:26,501
That's because it's illegal to sell alcohol after five on a Sunday in Connecticut.

370
00:21:27,379 --> 00:21:31,217
Are you serious? So what do people do then?

371
00:21:31,217 --> 00:21:34,388
They buy their liquor before five.

372
00:21:34,388 --> 00:21:36,473
I think what she means is,

373
00:21:36,473 --> 00:21:38,058
is there, like, another place around here to pick up some wine?

374
00:21:38,058 --> 00:21:41,271
We're headed to a party. And we just don't want to show up empty handed.

375
00:21:41,271 --> 00:21:44,941
You could drive over the border to New York.

376
00:21:44,941 --> 00:21:47,445
You might be able to find something in Port Chester.

377
00:21:47,445 --> 00:21:50,781
If someone hadn't forgotten the wine, we wouldn't be in this situation.

378
00:21:50,781 --> 00:21:54,077
It's not like you have a lot going on right now, David.

379
00:21:54,077 --> 00:21:56,537
All I ask is that you bring the stuff that I went out of my way to get.

380
00:21:58,539 --> 00:22:02,378
Even though I have this deadline

381
00:22:02,378 --> 00:22:03,629
and you should be supporting me right now.

382
00:22:03,629 --> 00:22:05,548
I should be supporting you?

383
00:22:05,548 --> 00:22:07,549
Jennifer, I read every draft of your last book.

384
00:22:08,551 --> 00:22:12,639
And gave extensive notes. And there were many, many drafts.

385
00:22:12,639 --> 00:22:16,186
And now, when all I'm asking is for you to return the favor,

386
00:22:16,186 --> 00:22:19,563
and read something of mine,

387
00:22:19,563 --> 00:22:21,150
you're like, "Oh, I can't leave the world of my book."

388
00:22:21,150 --> 00:22:23,569
That's fucked up, Jennifer, and you know it.

389
00:22:23,569 --> 00:22:26,948
My therapist says, when you get like this,

390
00:22:26,948 --> 00:22:28,950
-it triggers my anxiety. -Your therapist is an idiot.

391
00:22:28,950 --> 00:22:32,413
He butt dials you on a daily basis.

392
00:22:32,413 --> 00:22:33,956
He just got an iPhone. It's a difficult transition.

393
00:22:33,956 --> 00:22:37,711
Maybe it's that hard if you're a cat hoarder.

394
00:22:37,711 --> 00:22:39,338
-He's not a cat hoarder. -You said it yourself.

395
00:22:39,338 --> 00:22:41,840
Every time you showed up to a session, there's a different cat.

396
00:22:41,840 --> 00:22:44,260
I told you, I think he shelters them.

397
00:22:44,260 --> 00:22:46,846
Or maybe he's just got one cat.

398
00:22:46,846 --> 00:22:48,681
It just magically changes colors

399
00:22:48,681 --> 00:22:50,392
every time you come to visit. Like a mood ring.

400
00:22:50,392 --> 00:22:52,602
But more than likely,

401
00:22:52,602 --> 00:22:54,231
he just got a bunch of cats that he's jammed into his bedroom.

402
00:22:54,231 --> 00:22:56,900
When you come in for a session,

403
00:22:56,900 --> 00:22:58,609
and they're just clawing at the door waiting to get out.

404
00:22:58,609 --> 00:23:01,364
So they can piss all over that couch you've paid to sit on.

405
00:23:08,372 --> 00:23:12,585
Hey, you know what? Let's just try this place right here.

406
00:23:12,585 --> 00:23:15,213
That's a convenience store. They're not gonna have wine.

407
00:23:15,213 --> 00:23:18,509
You never know. Things are different when you leave the city.

408
00:23:22,721 --> 00:23:26,642
Yeah. There's no wine here. Let's go.

409
00:23:26,642 --> 00:23:28,604
Come on, let's look around.

410
00:23:28,604 --> 00:23:30,689
We've got to go.

411
00:23:33,651 --> 00:23:37,655
Ah, look. They've got a great beer selection.

412
00:23:37,655 --> 00:23:40,658
Let's just get a six pack.

413
00:23:40,658 --> 00:23:42,120
Yeah. Let's grab some Brewskis for our bros Lily and Bernard.

414
00:23:42,120 --> 00:23:45,039
Maybe we can get, like, a pony keg too.

415
00:23:45,039 --> 00:23:47,042
Okay. Look. Look right here. Look, huh.

416
00:23:47,042 --> 00:23:50,171
-Wine. They've got wine. -That's not wine.

417
00:23:50,171 --> 00:23:53,049
Sure it is. It's Palazzo de Carmelo.

418
00:23:53,049 --> 00:23:55,385
Nope, that's wine product.

419
00:23:55,385 --> 00:23:57,137
No, that's like, that's grape juice with alcohol mixed in it.

420
00:23:57,137 --> 00:24:00,016
Nobody will know the difference. It will be fine.

421
00:24:00,016 --> 00:24:01,809
Hey. Is this good?

422
00:24:01,809 --> 00:24:05,022
I'm just gonna ask him if there's a liquor store around here.

423
00:24:05,022 --> 00:24:07,941
This might be our best option.

424
00:24:07,941 --> 00:24:10,027
Who? Bernard and Lily are art patrons.

425
00:24:10,027 --> 00:24:12,197
You can't bring that into their homes.

426
00:24:12,197 --> 00:24:13,907
I mean, I don't know what other options we have.

427
00:24:13,907 --> 00:24:15,700
Look, they've got a bunch of different types. There's like a...

428
00:24:15,700 --> 00:24:18,746
There's a...

429
00:24:18,746 --> 00:24:20,706
One that looks like Pinot.

430
00:24:49,281 --> 00:24:53,245
Do you see a lady over there in a nice dress? No?

431
00:24:53,245 --> 00:24:55,956
Haven't seen a lady, have you?

432
00:25:11,641 --> 00:25:15,312
Do you see a woman walking by here?

433
00:25:27,951 --> 00:25:31,872
-Hi. How are you? -Hi, did you see my husband?

434
00:25:31,872 --> 00:25:34,334
He was here before.

435
00:25:34,334 --> 00:25:35,794
No, I don't remember.

436
00:25:35,794 --> 00:25:37,379
-Okay. -I'm sorry.

437
00:25:46,932 --> 00:25:50,810
Hey, did my wife come back through here?

438
00:25:50,810 --> 00:25:53,106
-No, I don't remember seeing her. -Shit!

439
00:25:53,106 --> 00:25:55,776
Fuck!

440
00:25:56,151 --> 00:25:57,027
Sure it makes sense. Perfect sense.

441
00:25:59,989 --> 00:26:01,824
No, It doesn't make sense at all.

442
00:26:01,824 --> 00:26:03,951
-Hey, look who it is. -Oh, it's the road fucker.

443
00:26:03,951 --> 00:26:07,540
What are you doing here?

444
00:26:07,540 --> 00:26:12,378
My wife and I, we were here earlier to pick up some wine and then she stepped outside and I haven't found her. She disappeared.

445
00:26:12,378 --> 00:26:16,175
-Wait. Your wife is missing? -Yes, my wife is missing.

446
00:26:16,175 --> 00:26:19,011
Or maybe your "wife" went home to her husband.

447
00:26:19,011 --> 00:26:22,140
-I'm the husband. -He's talking about the other husband.

448
00:26:22,140 --> 00:26:24,850
-Other husband. -There is no other husband.

449
00:26:24,850 --> 00:26:26,270
I'm the husband. It's one and the same.

450
00:26:26,270 --> 00:26:28,272
-They were fighting before. -What?

451
00:26:28,272 --> 00:26:29,733
Is that true?

452
00:26:29,733 --> 00:26:30,857
-No, we were not fighting. -Were you fighting?

453
00:26:30,857 --> 00:26:32,151
No, we got into a little argument.

454
00:26:32,151 --> 00:26:33,860
-We pulled over to buy some wine... -They don't sell wine here.

455
00:26:33,860 --> 00:26:36,448
Sure they do. The Palazzo de Carmelo.

456
00:26:36,448 --> 00:26:38,701
The Palazzo de Carmelo? That's bum's milk.

457
00:26:38,701 --> 00:26:41,245
Sometimes it's little fights that send people over the edge.

458
00:26:41,245 --> 00:26:43,998
Like, last week we responded to a domestic,

459
00:26:43,998 --> 00:26:46,168
where the wife hit the husband

460
00:26:46,168 --> 00:26:47,877
-in the head with a pop corn bowl. -Boom.

461
00:26:47,877 --> 00:26:49,213
Yeah. She split his head wide open, you know.

462
00:26:49,213 --> 00:26:51,048
All because he changed the channel. They were watching, uh...

463
00:26:51,048 --> 00:26:53,884
-What was it? -Dancing With the Stars.

464
00:26:53,884 --> 00:26:55,178
-Dancing With the Stars. -It was the finale.

465
00:26:55,178 --> 00:26:57,264
Road fucker, you ever see a show called Snapped on Oxygen?

466
00:26:58,933 --> 00:27:01,520
-No. -You should watch it.

467
00:27:02,687 --> 00:27:04,689
Lot of life lessons for you.

468
00:27:04,897 --> 00:27:06,191
-Okay. -Look,

469
00:27:08,319 --> 00:27:09,529
your wife have her cell phone on her?

470
00:27:09,529 --> 00:27:12,741
She doesn't own a cell phone, 'cause she's a writer

471
00:27:12,741 --> 00:27:15,909
and she thinks it messes with her process.

472
00:27:15,909 --> 00:27:18,038
Okay. What's her name?

473
00:27:18,038 --> 00:27:19,707
Her name's Jennifer Lee.

474
00:27:19,707 --> 00:27:21,459
She also goes by J.M.

475
00:27:21,459 --> 00:27:23,378
Wait. Your wife is J.M. Lee, the author?

476
00:27:23,378 --> 00:27:26,215
-Yes. -Are you kidding?

477
00:27:26,215 --> 00:27:28,300
We're reading Blind Hearts right now.

478
00:27:28,300 --> 00:27:29,969
We've got a book club down at the precinct.

479
00:27:29,969 --> 00:27:32,054
Are you two Julie and Derrick?

480
00:27:32,054 --> 00:27:33,931
-What? -Julie and Derrick, from the book, Blind Hearts.

481
00:27:33,931 --> 00:27:36,894
Are you blind?

482
00:27:36,894 --> 00:27:38,061
What? No! I'm not blind.

483
00:27:38,061 --> 00:27:40,106
-You could be blind in one eye. -But no, I'm not blind.

484
00:27:40,106 --> 00:27:42,941
And... and we're not Derrick and Julie.

485
00:27:42,941 --> 00:27:44,778
Hey, why don't we just hop in your squad car

486
00:27:44,778 --> 00:27:47,947
and maybe we could drive around a little bit

487
00:27:47,947 --> 00:27:48,948
see if we could find--

488
00:27:48,948 --> 00:27:50,493
We're not gonna hop in our squad car and drive around. No, sir.

489
00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:54,707
I'll take a two by four.

490
00:27:54,707 --> 00:27:55,956
I'll tell you what. You go to that party, and then, uh...

491
00:27:55,956 --> 00:27:59,170
When she shows up there, and she probably will,

492
00:27:59,170 --> 00:28:01,381
- why don't you give us a call? - Want a winner one.

493
00:28:01,381 --> 00:28:03,966
-My direct line. -Come on, mate.

494
00:28:03,966 --> 00:28:06,136
I'm all out of business cards.

495
00:28:06,136 --> 00:28:08,347
-Have fun at the party. -Thanks.

496
00:28:08,347 --> 00:28:11,559
Take it easy.

497
00:28:27,954 --> 00:28:30,164
It's like Jurassic Park.

498
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:52,065
You can do this. Just...

499
00:28:53,651 --> 00:28:55,109
Just don't be weird.

500
00:29:55,347 --> 00:29:58,727
Oh.

501
00:30:00,020 --> 00:30:03,356
Joseph Heckler and Dan Garcia.

502
00:30:03,356 --> 00:30:06,944
That was wonderful.

503
00:30:06,944 --> 00:30:08,821
Out next performance will begin in about ten minutes.

504
00:30:08,821 --> 00:30:12,034
So, everyone mingle.

505
00:30:12,034 --> 00:30:14,202
And help yourself to some snacks.

506
00:30:16,623 --> 00:30:19,917
So, who do we have here?

507
00:30:19,917 --> 00:30:22,545
I am David Warwik.

508
00:30:23,128 --> 00:30:25,633
Uh, we met the other night. I'm Jennifer's wife.

509
00:30:25,633 --> 00:30:28,302
-I'm sorry. Jennifer's my wife. -Jennifer.

510
00:30:28,302 --> 00:30:30,555
Jennifer Lee. Sorry. J.M. Lee.

511
00:30:30,555 --> 00:30:32,432
Oh, oh. David, forgive me. I hardly recognize you without Jennifer by your side.

512
00:30:34,392 --> 00:30:37,813
Where is she?

513
00:30:37,813 --> 00:30:38,982
I was actually hoping that she was already...

514
00:30:38,982 --> 00:30:40,901
-Well, who do we have here? -It's Jennifer's husband.

515
00:30:40,901 --> 00:30:44,321
Your writer... J.M's husband.

516
00:30:44,321 --> 00:30:46,866
Oh, yes.

517
00:30:48,283 --> 00:30:51,496
Oh, I brought you some wine.

518
00:30:51,496 --> 00:30:54,291
Oh, so I see. Jennifer told you.

519
00:30:54,291 --> 00:30:57,211
-Told me what? -That I'm a wine connoisseur.

520
00:30:57,211 --> 00:31:00,171
She's a sommelier.

521
00:31:00,171 --> 00:31:01,341
I've taken a few courses.

522
00:31:01,341 --> 00:31:03,175
-Oh. -[Lily chuckling]

523
00:31:03,175 --> 00:31:04,804
Where is this wine from?

524
00:31:04,804 --> 00:31:06,430
You'll have to forgive me. I'm blind without my glasses.

525
00:31:08,599 --> 00:31:10,476
America?

526
00:31:11,853 --> 00:31:15,691
Oh, there is some excellent New World wines nowadays. What is the varieto?

527
00:31:15,691 --> 00:31:16,943
Beg your pardon?

528
00:31:16,943 --> 00:31:18,192
The varieto? The type of grape?

529
00:31:18,192 --> 00:31:20,238
It's uh...

530
00:31:20,697 --> 00:31:22,116
-A blend? -Oh, merlot.

531
00:31:24,199 --> 00:31:26,453
Merlots are extremely underrated.

532
00:31:26,453 --> 00:31:28,414
That's true. I've tasted some exquisite mellows

533
00:31:28,414 --> 00:31:31,251
-What is the vineyard? Palazzo de... -Carmelo.

534
00:31:31,251 --> 00:31:34,504
You know, I've never heard of them.

535
00:31:34,504 --> 00:31:36,757
Well, we look forward to tasting it.

536
00:31:36,757 --> 00:31:39,218
-Yagoda. -[Lily exclaiming] Oh!

537
00:31:39,218 --> 00:31:42,389
Yagoda, what is this?

538
00:31:42,389 --> 00:31:45,517
It's a gift. I make it for you at your artist colony.

539
00:31:45,517 --> 00:31:48,227
-Oh, it's fabulous, don't you think? - Wonderful.

540
00:31:57,115 --> 00:32:00,368
This is McDannell.

541
00:32:00,368 --> 00:32:02,370
Yeah. This is David Warwik. My wife is missing.

542
00:32:02,370 --> 00:32:05,833
Road fucker.

543
00:32:05,833 --> 00:32:07,501
I just... I came to the party.

544
00:32:07,501 --> 00:32:10,172
Like, you all said, the one that we were supposed to go to and she's...

545
00:32:11,089 --> 00:32:14,301
She's not here.

546
00:32:14,301 --> 00:32:16,179
And so I was just wondering if there was any information on your side?

547
00:32:16,179 --> 00:32:18,890
Yeah, I don't have anything for you yet.

548
00:32:18,890 --> 00:32:21,266
 Nothing?

549
00:32:21,266 --> 00:32:22,519
-No. -Maybe I should just

550
00:32:22,519 --> 00:32:25,272
come down to the station and just wait there.

551
00:32:25,272 --> 00:32:27,901
No,the best thing for you to dowould be to stay at that party.

552
00:32:27,901 --> 00:32:30,945
And then if she comes there, give us a call.

553
00:32:30,945 --> 00:32:33,280
And if anything washes up on this end, we'll let you know.

554
00:32:34,533 --> 00:32:38,286
Yeah. We got a special APB out on.

555
00:32:38,286 --> 00:32:40,999
-Yeah, we got a task force. -Yeah.

556
00:32:40,999 --> 00:32:43,585
Okay.

557
00:33:28,263 --> 00:33:32,309
Excuse me. You said you wanted to use the phone.

558
00:33:32,309 --> 00:33:35,353
It's available now.

559
00:33:35,353 --> 00:33:37,065
Uh, thanks. Yeah, in a minute.

560
00:33:37,065 --> 00:33:39,025
That's strange. It doesn't have a vintage.

561
00:33:47,952 --> 00:33:51,455
Does this smell right to you?

562
00:33:51,455 --> 00:33:53,500
No.

563
00:33:56,545 --> 00:34:00,382
Okay, everyone. Please take your seats.

564
00:34:00,382 --> 00:34:04,138
Next, we will be hearing from a young, promising writer,

565
00:34:07,267 --> 00:34:10,020
Eric Windbed.

566
00:34:15,775 --> 00:34:19,404
Well, I'm Eric Windbed.

567
00:34:19,404 --> 00:34:20,782
I'm gonna be reading from my yet to be published novel,

568
00:34:22,199 --> 00:34:25,411
Crept.

569
00:34:27,123 --> 00:34:30,668
When baby girl ask about daddy,

570
00:34:30,668 --> 00:34:33,255
momma say, he cracked.

571
00:34:34,005 --> 00:34:36,507
Sometimes, the crack of the whip can drive a man insane.

572
00:34:38,637 --> 00:34:41,639
Year was 1831.

573
00:34:42,056 --> 00:34:44,810
And we, we was the only white family in slavery.

574
00:34:47,188 --> 00:34:49,065
So, you say you still don't have a publisher?

575
00:34:51,109 --> 00:34:53,862
Well, I've had some offers,

576
00:34:53,862 --> 00:34:55,949
but I'm waiting for the best one to appear.

577
00:34:56,908 --> 00:34:58,410
You should give me a call in the morning.

578
00:35:00,913 --> 00:35:03,290
I think we can do something with this.

579
00:35:04,541 --> 00:35:06,752
Hi, I'm Bruce.

580
00:35:07,460 --> 00:35:10,048
Bruce Wayne.

581
00:35:10,464 --> 00:35:11,758
No relation. Not Batman.

582
00:35:12,466 --> 00:35:14,971
You know, my wife and I've...

583
00:35:15,888 --> 00:35:18,474
We've lived in this hood for, uh, 25 years.

584
00:35:18,474 --> 00:35:21,895
There's never been anything like this party.

585
00:35:21,895 --> 00:35:23,897
Oh, we used to have to go to New York for, uh,

586
00:35:23,897 --> 00:35:26,482
you know, a culture fix. But, uh...

587
00:35:26,482 --> 00:35:29,612
I mean, since Lily started these parties

588
00:35:29,612 --> 00:35:31,323
I don't think I'm ever gonna leave Greenwich.

589
00:35:31,323 --> 00:35:33,242
-What do you do? -I'm a writer.

590
00:35:33,826 --> 00:35:36,287
Would I happen have read something you've written?

591
00:35:36,287 --> 00:35:38,957
I did, uh, piece for The New Yorker a few years back.

592
00:35:38,957 --> 00:35:42,962
The New Yorker? You must be really good.

593
00:35:43,754 --> 00:35:46,590
-Uh, you know I'm all right. -Mmm-mmm.

594
00:35:47,508 --> 00:35:49,552
You know what I do?

595
00:35:49,552 --> 00:35:51,054
-I-I... I don't know. -Come on, guess.

596
00:35:52,639 --> 00:35:55,642
-I'm not really... -Oh, come on. Come on.

597
00:35:56,561 --> 00:35:57,979
I don't know. I...

598
00:36:00,065 --> 00:36:01,942
Lawyer?

599
00:36:03,152 --> 00:36:04,111
No.

600
00:36:04,820 --> 00:36:05,779
-Accountant? -No.

601
00:36:07,282 --> 00:36:09,200
Politician?

602
00:36:10,411 --> 00:36:12,121
Cosmetic dentistry,

603
00:36:12,121 --> 00:36:14,040
Okay. I was never gonna guess that.

604
00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:16,542
But I'm also working on a novel of my own.

605
00:36:16,542 --> 00:36:18,669
-Oh. -It's a sci-fi novel

606
00:36:18,669 --> 00:36:20,881
about a guy who has teeth growing

607
00:36:21,715 --> 00:36:25,053
in all sort of strange places, like, in his arm pits.

608
00:36:25,053 --> 00:36:28,639
This is a condition caused by a glandular problem

609
00:36:28,639 --> 00:36:31,518
triggered by hormones used in the dairy and meat industries.

610
00:36:33,562 --> 00:36:36,983
It's topical.

611
00:36:36,983 --> 00:36:38,943
I'm gonna give this to Bernard as soon as I finish it. And I...

612
00:36:40,111 --> 00:36:43,824
I think he's gonna wanna publish it.

613
00:36:43,824 --> 00:36:45,575
Great.

614
00:36:45,575 --> 00:36:46,619
Can I... Can I look at those chompers?

615
00:36:46,619 --> 00:36:49,579
-No, really. Let me take a look. -No, no. Please don't. No.

616
00:36:49,622 --> 00:36:53,336
I know you are intellectual.

617
00:36:53,336 --> 00:36:55,004
Get dental.

618
00:36:55,004 --> 00:36:56,881
Not bad. You've got a unique set of bicuspids.

619
00:36:57,673 --> 00:37:01,011
Thank you.

620
00:37:01,011 --> 00:37:02,179
-And you drink too much coffee. -Okay.

621
00:37:02,179 --> 00:37:04,224
That's stain in there. You smoke?

622
00:37:04,224 --> 00:37:06,599
No.

623
00:37:06,599 --> 00:37:07,811
You need a whitening session.

624
00:37:08,812 --> 00:37:10,439
Yeah, you're gonna call me.

625
00:37:10,980 --> 00:37:12,732
I'm gonna give you the friends and family discount.

626
00:37:12,732 --> 00:37:15,529
Thanks.

627
00:37:15,529 --> 00:37:16,611
So, uh, what brings you to the Bacchanalia?

628
00:37:16,611 --> 00:37:20,283
You're gonna read something tonight?

629
00:37:20,283 --> 00:37:22,119
No, I came here with my wife.

630
00:37:22,911 --> 00:37:25,706
Is she an artist?

631
00:37:25,706 --> 00:37:27,625
She's a... She's a writer as well.

632
00:37:27,625 --> 00:37:30,462
And where did you two meet?

633
00:37:30,921 --> 00:37:32,840
Your essay is really good.

634
00:37:32,840 --> 00:37:34,967
You should submit it to the paper this year.

635
00:37:34,967 --> 00:37:37,220
-Really? -Yeah.

636
00:37:37,220 --> 00:37:38,346
-Thanks, Professor Warwik. -No worries, yeah.

637
00:37:38,346 --> 00:37:41,058
Hi. Are you David Warwik?

638
00:37:41,766 --> 00:37:45,645
I might be. Are you about to serve me with papers?

639
00:37:46,189 --> 00:37:49,442
What no.

640
00:37:49,442 --> 00:37:51,652
All right. Then I'm David Warwik.

641
00:37:51,652 --> 00:37:52,737
-Hi, uh, I'm Jennifer. -Hi, Jennifer.

642
00:37:52,737 --> 00:37:56,284
An MFA student here.

643
00:37:56,284 --> 00:37:57,659
-Very nice to meet you. I'm David Warwik. -Yes, hi.

644
00:37:57,659 --> 00:38:01,081
I've been trying to take your class. But it's always full.

645
00:38:01,081 --> 00:38:03,834
Yeah. No, it is. I...

646
00:38:03,834 --> 00:38:06,588
I don't know what happened.

647
00:38:06,588 --> 00:38:09,341
All of a sudden, all of these people want to come take it.And I think it's because the syllabus this year,

648
00:38:09,341 --> 00:38:11,759
it looks really good.

649
00:38:11,759 --> 00:38:13,179
-Yeah. That's what they say. -Yeah?

650
00:38:13,179 --> 00:38:14,889
You give good syllabi.

651
00:38:14,889 --> 00:38:16,682
Yeah, I draw little pictures in the margins.

652
00:38:16,682 --> 00:38:18,683
It's on some nice goldenrod paper.

653
00:38:18,683 --> 00:38:19,978
-It's wonderful. -I love goldenrod.

654
00:38:19,978 --> 00:38:21,687
It's a nice Arial font.

655
00:38:21,687 --> 00:38:22,939
What I say in the class, nobody is paying attention to.

656
00:38:22,939 --> 00:38:25,318
But that syllabus, that piece of paper,

657
00:38:25,318 --> 00:38:27,945
people, oh, they fight over that thing. It goes on ebay.

658
00:38:27,945 --> 00:38:30,866
-Well. -Yeah. Are you a writer?

659
00:38:30,866 --> 00:38:33,369
Uh, uh...

660
00:38:33,369 --> 00:38:35,703
Yes, sort of. I'm trying to be.

661
00:38:35,703 --> 00:38:38,291
There's no trying. You are a writer.

662
00:38:39,167 --> 00:38:40,294
Sorry. I just wanted to tell you that, uh...

663
00:38:43,047 --> 00:38:45,966
I really liked your New Yorker piece.

664
00:38:45,966 --> 00:38:48,178
-It's really good. -Thank you. Thank you very much.

665
00:38:48,178 --> 00:38:50,347
That, uh...

666
00:38:50,347 --> 00:38:51,641
That really means a lot. I'm really glad that you read it.

667
00:38:51,641 --> 00:38:53,392
-Yeah. -Yeah.

668
00:38:53,893 --> 00:38:54,810
What are you doing right now, Jennifer?

669
00:38:57,729 --> 00:38:59,441
I was... I was gonna go grab a cup of coffee.

670
00:38:59,441 --> 00:39:01,734
-If you'd like to join me? -Yeah.

671
00:39:01,734 --> 00:39:04,155
-All right. Let's do it. -Okay.

672
00:39:04,614 --> 00:39:06,115
So, um... what are you working on right now?

673
00:39:08,494 --> 00:39:11,745
I'm actually working on a novel. It's a...

674
00:39:11,745 --> 00:39:14,459
-Really? -Yeah.

675
00:39:14,459 --> 00:39:15,960
Semi-autobiographical thing.

676
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:18,630
You know the orgies at Yarda were totally tame this year?

677
00:39:18,630 --> 00:39:21,425
-Oh, that's shame. Wow. -Nothing like 2012.

678
00:39:21,425 --> 00:39:24,721
[scoffing] How can you compare her?

679
00:39:24,721 --> 00:39:26,889
-I'm still on antibiotics from it. -I know.

680
00:39:26,889 --> 00:39:29,767
I was proud of you though.

681
00:39:29,767 --> 00:39:31,646
Expanding my horizons.

682
00:39:31,646 --> 00:39:34,190
That's something different for you.

683
00:39:34,190 --> 00:39:35,774
It was something different for you.

684
00:39:35,774 --> 00:39:36,943
It was weird having my sister there though.

685
00:39:36,943 --> 00:39:39,153
-I didn't mind it. Awkwardly, I didn't mind it. -No?

686
00:39:39,153 --> 00:39:42,157
I just you know, I fell like... Christmas is really awkward now.

687
00:39:42,408 --> 00:39:46,413
I go home, and like... we just stare at each other.

688
00:39:46,413 --> 00:39:49,790
Right. But your work's better.

689
00:39:49,790 --> 00:39:51,335
Thanks. Thank you.

690
00:39:54,796 --> 00:39:56,633
Hi, you've reached Jennifer and David.

691
00:39:56,633 --> 00:39:58,800
Please leave us a message and we'll be sure to get back to you.

692
00:40:02,139 --> 00:40:04,225
 Jen, are you there? It's like the eight time I've called the machine.

693
00:40:04,225 --> 00:40:08,314
I'm kind of freaking out. I... I ran into those cops.

694
00:40:08,314 --> 00:40:11,275
They told me that I should come to the party

695
00:40:11,275 --> 00:40:13,319
and I don't know what's going on.

696
00:40:13,319 --> 00:40:14,945
I don't know if you're mad or what...

697
00:40:14,945 --> 00:40:16,906
Just give me a call and let me know you're okay. May be you're on your way.

698
00:40:16,906 --> 00:40:19,744
Please. Be on your way. Just... I'm so worried right now. I love you.

699
00:40:29,254 --> 00:40:30,838
-McDannell. -Yeah. This is David Warwik.

700
00:40:30,838 --> 00:40:32,966
Hey, David. I'm sorry. We still don't have any leads.

701
00:40:32,966 --> 00:40:36,220
Really? Nothing?

702
00:40:36,220 --> 00:40:40,434
Just try to relax, all right. She's gonna turn up soon. I... That's what they said in like Gone Girl.

703
00:40:40,434 --> 00:40:42,519
And this is starting to feel like Gone Girlsituation and she hated that book.

704
00:40:42,519 --> 00:40:45,939
But that might be the perfect cover

705
00:40:45,939 --> 00:40:48,109
for somebody who's trying to Gone Girl somebody.

706
00:40:48,109 --> 00:40:50,696
Hello? Hello? Hello?

707
00:40:50,696 --> 00:40:52,740
This guy is wound up.

708
00:40:53,866 --> 00:40:55,494
Yeah. No wonder she left him.

709
00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:57,869
Yeah. I don't blame her.

710
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:09,426
♪ I am ♪

711
00:41:09,426 --> 00:41:11,303
♪ The fiji mermaid ♪

712
00:41:13,097 --> 00:41:15,767
♪ A fish out of ♪

713
00:41:16,768 --> 00:41:18,562
♪ Waaaaaa... ♪

714
00:41:18,562 --> 00:41:21,897
You know, I'm thinking of moving to Detroit.

715
00:41:23,735 --> 00:41:25,277
My friend Jeremiah moved to Detroit and got shot in the face.

716
00:41:28,740 --> 00:41:30,785
-Oh, my God. -Yeah.

717
00:41:32,077 --> 00:41:33,911
-Jeremiah Boobar? -Yes.

718
00:41:33,911 --> 00:41:35,415
 He was?

719
00:41:36,374 --> 00:41:40,337
Two weeks ago, he moved to Detroit and got shot in the face. -Did you go to the funeral? -No.

720
00:41:40,337 --> 00:41:42,297
Funeral? He's alive and kicking. He's gonna make a documentary about it, you know.

721
00:41:43,298 --> 00:41:46,010
-Where did he get the funding? -Indiegogo.

722
00:41:49,930 --> 00:41:52,017
I wanna get shot in the face.

723
00:41:52,017 --> 00:41:53,936
I'm a critic. Book critic.

724
00:41:55,312 --> 00:41:57,482
-Right. -And so you... What's your genre?

725
00:41:58,150 --> 00:42:00,277
I don't... I don't have one.

726
00:42:01,863 --> 00:42:03,823
Let me give you a tip.

727
00:42:03,823 --> 00:42:05,116
Pick a genre and just give yourself over to it, okay?

728
00:42:05,116 --> 00:42:07,619
You wanna be the go-to guy for whatever your genre is.

729
00:42:07,619 --> 00:42:10,832
Look at Stephen King.

730
00:42:10,832 --> 00:42:11,999
You can carve out a little niche for yourself.

731
00:42:11,999 --> 00:42:14,252
Depending on the sub-genre that you pick, like,

732
00:42:14,252 --> 00:42:16,588
you know, pre-teen whore or adult sci-fi romance.

733
00:42:16,588 --> 00:42:19,257
I would, you know, narrow it down... What's your name?

734
00:42:19,257 --> 00:42:21,968
David Warwik.

735
00:42:21,968 --> 00:42:23,805
David Warwik.

736
00:42:23,805 --> 00:42:25,181
Okay, you want people to remember your name, David Warwik.

737
00:42:25,181 --> 00:42:27,851
Right there, that's tough.

738
00:42:27,851 --> 00:42:29,227
It doesn't have a ring to it. You know what I mean?

739
00:42:29,227 --> 00:42:30,978
You want something that pops. You want something tintinnabulation.

740
00:42:30,978 --> 00:42:33,816
Ringing of bells. Ding!

741
00:42:33,816 --> 00:42:35,568
You want your name, people hear name... Ding!

742
00:42:35,568 --> 00:42:37,654
You wanna remember it. Warwik is tardy.

743
00:42:37,654 --> 00:42:39,615
It falls like flat turd, splat on the pavement.

744
00:42:39,615 --> 00:42:41,868
You want something that has... That resonates sustainability.

745
00:42:41,868 --> 00:42:44,871
Like metal.

746
00:42:44,871 --> 00:42:46,080
Change your last name to something metallic.

747
00:42:46,080 --> 00:42:48,208
David Gold, David Iron. David Nickel.

748
00:42:48,208 --> 00:42:51,002
You almost get to flick it. You get to flick that name. It sounds so just...

749
00:42:51,002 --> 00:42:54,005
You know, you want people to do it.

750
00:42:54,005 --> 00:42:55,049
It doesn't matter what the metal is.

751
00:42:55,049 --> 00:42:56,968
David Bronze. David Silver.

752
00:43:08,899 --> 00:43:12,319
What time is it?

753
00:43:12,319 --> 00:43:13,905
It's around 7:00.

754
00:43:15,740 --> 00:43:17,158
-Are you still reading? -Shh!

755
00:43:20,412 --> 00:43:21,580
 Have you slept?

756
00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:26,253
No. I'm almost done.

757
00:43:27,587 --> 00:43:29,089
You stayed up all night reading it?

758
00:43:31,300 --> 00:43:33,344
Does that mean you like it?

759
00:43:33,344 --> 00:43:34,512
Will you shush? Just let me finish.

760
00:43:47,736 --> 00:43:51,365
Okay. You're gonna have to leave.

761
00:43:51,365 --> 00:43:53,034
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Okay, yeah.

762
00:43:54,035 --> 00:43:56,078
I'm gonna go breakfast.

763
00:43:59,584 --> 00:44:03,129
Let me just... Let me sleep.

764
00:44:27,365 --> 00:44:30,620
So...

765
00:44:30,620 --> 00:44:31,829
Do you like it?

766
00:44:43,009 --> 00:44:46,179
It was terrible.

767
00:44:46,722 --> 00:44:48,139
Oh.

768
00:44:49,933 --> 00:44:51,226
Yeah. I mean, I know that I have to rework the ending.

769
00:44:55,440 --> 00:44:59,235
Jen, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

770
00:44:59,235 --> 00:45:01,989
-It's brilliant. -What?

771
00:45:01,989 --> 00:45:03,825
Yeah. I'm so proud of you.

772
00:45:03,825 --> 00:45:05,368
-You think it's good? -I think it's great.

773
00:45:05,368 --> 00:45:07,788
How good?

774
00:45:08,580 --> 00:45:09,706
-I just told you, like, great. -Like "good" good?

775
00:45:09,706 --> 00:45:11,165
-No, no, like great? -I just told you.

776
00:45:11,165 --> 00:45:12,710
-It's so good. -Is it your favorite book in the whole world?

777
00:45:12,710 --> 00:45:15,005
 No. My favorite book is still Garfield Loves Lasagna.

778
00:45:25,225 --> 00:45:28,771
What are you doing?

779
00:45:30,940 --> 00:45:34,235
Are you drawing me?

780
00:45:45,540 --> 00:45:49,129
I see you've met Anal.

781
00:45:49,129 --> 00:45:51,672
It's spelled like anal, but it means fire in Hindi.

782
00:45:52,464 --> 00:45:56,302
He's a brilliant visual artist and a monk.

783
00:45:56,302 --> 00:45:58,931
We go to the same Ashram.

784
00:45:59,807 --> 00:46:01,434
I see.

785
00:46:02,102 --> 00:46:03,477
-I'm Daniel. -Oh, I'm David.

786
00:46:03,477 --> 00:46:06,732
So, what do you do?

787
00:46:06,732 --> 00:46:08,025
I'm a writer.

788
00:46:08,734 --> 00:46:10,069
Really? So am I. What genre?

789
00:46:10,069 --> 00:46:11,988
Well, I'm working on my first novel right now.

790
00:46:11,988 --> 00:46:14,532
Well, what's that about?

791
00:46:14,532 --> 00:46:16,241
It's a coming-of-age tale about a murder in a township in New Jersey.

792
00:46:16,618 --> 00:46:20,372
And it's sort of semi-autobiographical.

793
00:46:20,372 --> 00:46:23,460
-Is that Salman Rushdie? -What?

794
00:46:24,335 --> 00:46:25,963
Forget it. It's some bald guy.

795
00:46:28,090 --> 00:46:30,092
So, yeah. A murder...

796
00:46:30,968 --> 00:46:32,303
Yeah, so... Just kind off...

797
00:46:32,303 --> 00:46:35,263
Looking at it will be like--

798
00:46:35,263 --> 00:46:37,059
There were a lot of child murder books last year.

799
00:46:37,059 --> 00:46:39,436
Just FYI.

800
00:46:40,146 --> 00:46:41,481
Oh, okay.

801
00:46:42,899 --> 00:46:44,274
Uh, what about you? What are you working on?

802
00:46:44,274 --> 00:46:46,111
I never talk about my writing.

803
00:46:46,111 --> 00:46:48,322
Feel like it hinders the creative process.

804
00:46:52,577 --> 00:46:56,248
So you're reading tonight?

805
00:46:56,248 --> 00:46:58,626
No. No, I didn't... I didn't bring anything.

806
00:46:58,626 --> 00:47:01,046
That's too bad.

807
00:47:01,046 --> 00:47:02,421
So what are you doing here if you're not reading?

808
00:47:03,547 --> 00:47:06,551
My wife thought it'd be a good idea for us to come to this.

809
00:47:06,551 --> 00:47:09,346
Oh, who's your wife?

810
00:47:09,346 --> 00:47:10,890
She's a writer as well. Her name is J.M. Lee.

811
00:47:11,516 --> 00:47:13,476
-How is Jennifer? -You know her?

812
00:47:15,310 --> 00:47:17,313
Yeah.

813
00:47:17,313 --> 00:47:19,358
We met at a artist con I think, last fall.

814
00:47:19,358 --> 00:47:21,903
-The one at the Italian monastery. -That's the one.

815
00:47:21,903 --> 00:47:24,739
She loved that. She talked so much about it. Yeah.

816
00:47:25,865 --> 00:47:28,326
So, you're that David.

817
00:47:29,912 --> 00:47:31,330
I'm her husband, yeah.

818
00:47:33,331 --> 00:47:35,334
Yeah. Yeah.

819
00:47:35,334 --> 00:47:37,336
She's a real fire cracker.

820
00:47:37,336 --> 00:47:39,006
What does that mean?

821
00:47:40,842 --> 00:47:42,219
Nothing.

822
00:47:43,011 --> 00:47:44,137
Oh, excuse me.

823
00:47:46,098 --> 00:47:47,348
What? No, hold on. Hold on a second. What...

824
00:47:47,348 --> 00:47:49,601
What do you mean by that?

825
00:47:49,601 --> 00:47:50,979
Nothing.

826
00:47:51,312 --> 00:47:52,354
You don't just tell a married man

827
00:47:52,354 --> 00:47:53,731
his wife is a fire cracker and walk away.

828
00:47:54,524 --> 00:47:56,068
Sorry.

829
00:47:57,778 --> 00:47:59,113
Sorry?

830
00:47:59,362 --> 00:48:00,656
Did you fuck my wife in an Italian monastery?

831
00:48:00,656 --> 00:48:03,326
Oh, dude. You need to calm down.

832
00:48:03,326 --> 00:48:05,871
 No, I don't need to calm down.

833
00:48:05,871 --> 00:48:07,371
You need to tell me what happened?

834
00:48:07,371 --> 00:48:08,665
Nothing. We had a couple of fun dinners, drinks and grappa.

835
00:48:08,916 --> 00:48:12,377
You drank some grappa?

836
00:48:12,377 --> 00:48:14,172
Yeah. Hey, why don't you grab yourself a drink

837
00:48:14,172 --> 00:48:17,426
and cool off a bit.

838
00:48:17,426 --> 00:48:18,844
Man, you shut up and don't tell me what to do.

839
00:48:18,844 --> 00:48:21,890
I'm not... I don't need to cool off.

840
00:48:21,890 --> 00:48:23,683
I'm fucking cool, man.

841
00:48:23,683 --> 00:48:26,393
No. I don't think you are.

842
00:48:26,603 --> 00:48:28,856
I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't...

843
00:48:30,358 --> 00:48:32,235
I'm gonna go.

844
00:48:32,986 --> 00:48:34,696
Hey, you forgot your, uh...

845
00:48:35,530 --> 00:48:37,406
Yeah. Yeah.

846
00:49:10,821 --> 00:49:14,368
David.

847
00:49:14,368 --> 00:49:15,953
Hey, look. Check it out. It came.

848
00:49:16,703 --> 00:49:20,166
It looks amazing.

849
00:49:20,166 --> 00:49:21,542
-I can't believe it. -Oh, my god.

850
00:49:21,542 --> 00:49:22,794
-Congratulations. Look at that. -Thank you.

851
00:49:22,794 --> 00:49:25,172
Oh, I'm so proud of you.

852
00:49:25,172 --> 00:49:27,758
You just wait. I'll take your book next.

853
00:49:27,758 --> 00:49:30,095
You're a published author. That is so sexy.

854
00:49:31,469 --> 00:49:32,513
Oh, no.

855
00:49:34,724 --> 00:49:36,475
There's a typo.

856
00:49:36,475 --> 00:49:38,187
That's, that's okay. There are typos all the time.

857
00:49:38,187 --> 00:49:40,731
I know. It's the dedication page.

858
00:49:42,192 --> 00:49:42,692
David Warwi.

859
00:49:45,486 --> 00:49:47,698
They forgot the K in your last name.

860
00:49:47,698 --> 00:49:50,491
Is this... Is this the proof?

861
00:49:50,491 --> 00:49:51,911
It's the first edition. So maybe for the next draft.

862
00:49:53,997 --> 00:49:57,001
Sure. Yeah.

863
00:49:58,585 --> 00:49:59,379
I'm sorry, honey.

864
00:50:02,048 --> 00:50:03,383
 It's not a big deal.

865
00:50:04,843 --> 00:50:06,470
David. Hey.

866
00:50:07,263 --> 00:50:09,514
-Charles. -Nice to see you.

867
00:50:09,514 --> 00:50:11,516
-It's great to see you. -Yeah.

868
00:50:11,516 --> 00:50:12,978
I didn't expect to see you here.

869
00:50:12,978 --> 00:50:14,688
Yeah. Yeah, I used to be with Bernard

870
00:50:14,688 --> 00:50:16,441
before I went over to Loranda Press.

871
00:50:16,441 --> 00:50:17,774
Oh. Oh, wow. Wow. It... it's...

872
00:50:17,774 --> 00:50:21,154
-It's really nice to see you. -Likewise.

873
00:50:21,154 --> 00:50:23,031
-Yeah. God, I haven't seen you in ages. -Yeah.

874
00:50:23,031 --> 00:50:25,784
Like, three, four years, something like that?

875
00:50:25,784 --> 00:50:27,953
-The wedding. -The wedding.

876
00:50:27,953 --> 00:50:29,663
-Yes. -Fuck, the wedding. The wedding was amazing.

877
00:50:29,663 --> 00:50:32,500
-Yes. -That was an amazing wedding.

878
00:50:32,500 --> 00:50:33,835
Oh, I can't take all the credit.

879
00:50:33,835 --> 00:50:35,544
Jennifer did most of the planning and...

880
00:50:35,544 --> 00:50:37,546
I fucked Flora Bianca that night.

881
00:50:37,546 --> 00:50:39,549
-Really? -Yeah. It was amazing.

882
00:50:39,549 --> 00:50:41,551
-Wonderful. -Yeah. She opened a lot of...

883
00:50:41,551 --> 00:50:43,889
Lot of doors for me that night.

884
00:50:43,889 --> 00:50:46,434
It was great. Yeah. Lost touch with her unfortunately.

885
00:50:46,434 --> 00:50:49,560
Oh, well. If you want I...

886
00:50:49,560 --> 00:50:51,189
No, I think she sent me a pretty clear message, but...

887
00:50:51,189 --> 00:50:55,194
Anyway, still have good memories about that night.

888
00:50:55,194 --> 00:50:56,987
-It's really fine. -Nice. Uh, wonderful. Wonderful, yeah.

889
00:50:56,987 --> 00:50:59,572
Listen, I've been really backed up at work,

890
00:50:59,572 --> 00:51:01,951
and things have just gone a little nutty.

891
00:51:01,951 --> 00:51:03,912
And I lost out a few things. I'm really sorry.

892
00:51:03,912 --> 00:51:05,579
I never got back to the last email you sent me. I feel bad about that.

893
00:51:05,579 --> 00:51:09,001
Of course. Of course. You're busy.

894
00:51:09,001 --> 00:51:11,505
How's the job going, by the way?

895
00:51:11,505 --> 00:51:13,006
It's good. I mean, it is busy. But it's also, you know,

896
00:51:13,006 --> 00:51:15,884
really fun and rewarding, and nutty and...

897
00:51:15,884 --> 00:51:18,262
For me, it's still very, very fulfilling. You know.

898
00:51:18,262 --> 00:51:20,348
-It's great. I love it. -It's great. It's great.

899
00:51:20,348 --> 00:51:23,060
I read the, uh,

900
00:51:23,060 --> 00:51:24,520
Those first few chapters you sent my way.

901
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:26,980
-And it's really good. -Thank you. Thank you.

902
00:51:26,980 --> 00:51:30,026
Thank you. That means so much. Thank you so much.

903
00:51:30,026 --> 00:51:31,945
Yeah. Of course. Thanks for sharing it.

904
00:51:31,945 --> 00:51:33,405
Yeah, it's really good. I really enjoyed it.

905
00:51:33,405 --> 00:51:35,614
Ultimately, I decided, um,

906
00:51:35,614 --> 00:51:37,617
not to forward it to the acquisitions team.

907
00:51:37,617 --> 00:51:39,745
Um, but I really did like it.

908
00:51:39,745 --> 00:51:41,581
You liked it but you didn't forward it?

909
00:51:42,706 --> 00:51:46,086
Yeah, I mean, there is some beautiful moments in it.

910
00:51:46,086 --> 00:51:48,629
You know, it's beautiful sentences,

911
00:51:48,629 --> 00:51:49,882
some really strong characters and story lines.

912
00:51:49,882 --> 00:51:51,134
But ultimately, it just felt a little, um...

913
00:51:51,134 --> 00:51:54,221
Just overall, it's a little challenging.

914
00:51:54,221 --> 00:51:56,807
I guess I thought challenging was supposed to be a good thing.

915
00:51:56,807 --> 00:51:59,936
Yeah. Sometimes. I mean, it can be certainly.

916
00:51:59,936 --> 00:52:02,272
But you know, this was challenging... difficult

917
00:52:02,272 --> 00:52:04,774
rather than challenging rewarding.

918
00:52:04,774 --> 00:52:06,650
Yeah. It just sounds like you don't like it.

919
00:52:06,650 --> 00:52:08,821
It's okay. You can say it.

920
00:52:08,821 --> 00:52:10,532
No, no, no, no. It's not that. Certainly, I genuinely did like it.

921
00:52:10,532 --> 00:52:12,658
I just felt, for a first novel, it was overly ambitious.

922
00:52:13,410 --> 00:52:17,165
You know, I think you're underwriting

923
00:52:17,165 --> 00:52:18,664
and overwriting at the same time.

924
00:52:18,664 --> 00:52:19,876
And also, the whole coming-of-age thing is just...

925
00:52:19,876 --> 00:52:22,753
It's been explored so many times,

926
00:52:22,753 --> 00:52:24,298
from so many different angles, it just feels a little familiar.

927
00:52:24,298 --> 00:52:27,468
And the subject matter, you know, racism...

928
00:52:27,468 --> 00:52:30,678
It's heavy. You know, it's heavy stuff.

929
00:52:30,678 --> 00:52:32,140
It's not exactly beach material.

930
00:52:32,140 --> 00:52:33,892
How long have you been working on it for?

931
00:52:33,892 --> 00:52:36,685
You know, not that long. A few...

932
00:52:36,685 --> 00:52:38,856
A few years. But not really, you know, not...

933
00:52:38,856 --> 00:52:42,194
You ever thought about maybe just taking a step back and...

934
00:52:42,194 --> 00:52:45,573
trying something else.

935
00:52:45,573 --> 00:52:46,697
You're working on other stuff right now?

936
00:52:46,697 --> 00:52:48,075
You know, there's other stuff I should pick up

937
00:52:49,410 --> 00:52:51,704
and put some things down,

938
00:52:51,704 --> 00:52:52,830
it all comes in fits and starts, so...

939
00:52:52,830 --> 00:52:55,250
-Right. -Yeah.

940
00:52:55,250 --> 00:52:56,669
Well, I know there's another good book inside you.

941
00:52:56,669 --> 00:52:59,297
Like Jennifer, you know, or...

942
00:53:00,006 --> 00:53:02,967
J.M. I guess that's her literary...

943
00:53:02,967 --> 00:53:05,387
Just a literary name. She's still Jennifer.

944
00:53:05,387 --> 00:53:07,056
She's still the same Jennifer.

945
00:53:07,056 --> 00:53:08,265
Same Jennifer. Look at how prolific she is.

946
00:53:08,265 --> 00:53:10,310
Just pumping out one book after the next.

947
00:53:10,310 --> 00:53:12,187
And look what it's doing to her career.

948
00:53:12,187 --> 00:53:13,729
She's blowing the fuck up.

949
00:53:13,729 --> 00:53:15,358
-Yeah. She is. She is. -Right.New York Times bestseller list.

950
00:53:15,358 --> 00:53:18,152
Are you kidding? That's huge. Right?

951
00:53:18,152 --> 00:53:20,737
Yeah, we're all proud of her.

952
00:53:20,737 --> 00:53:22,199
-Yeah. -Yeah.

953
00:53:22,199 --> 00:53:24,742
It's crazy. I always thought you'd be the one who, blew up first. But, uh...

954
00:53:24,993 --> 00:53:28,747
I guess she beat you to the punch.

955
00:53:28,747 --> 00:53:30,875
Yeah. She beat me to the punch.

956
00:53:30,875 --> 00:53:33,295
-Yeah. -Yeah.

957
00:53:33,295 --> 00:53:34,753
Is she here? I'd love to... to say hi to her.

958
00:53:35,047 --> 00:53:37,717
No, she is not.

959
00:53:38,510 --> 00:53:40,760
Well, if you see her at home, say hi.

960
00:53:40,760 --> 00:53:42,389
I will do that, Charles. I will do that.

961
00:53:42,389 --> 00:53:44,392
She's in a great groove.

962
00:53:44,392 --> 00:53:45,476
All right. It was really, really nice seeing you.

963
00:53:45,476 --> 00:53:47,311
And, uh, I'm gonna hit this baby quiche before it runs out.

964
00:53:47,311 --> 00:53:49,771
-Yeah. Yeah. -Nice seeing you. Good luck with everything.

965
00:53:49,771 --> 00:53:51,441
And send me an email when there's more stuff to share.

966
00:53:51,441 --> 00:53:53,944
-Yep. Yep. -Okay.

967
00:54:46,837 --> 00:54:50,385
Can I get a Scotch neat?

968
00:54:53,347 --> 00:54:56,849
Martini with a twist.

969
00:54:56,849 --> 00:54:59,020
Sawyer Edwards. Right?

970
00:54:59,020 --> 00:55:00,854
-Have we met? -I'm David Warwik.

971
00:55:00,854 --> 00:55:03,650
We met yesterday. I'm J.M. Lee's husband.

972
00:55:04,360 --> 00:55:07,279
David Warwik.

973
00:55:07,781 --> 00:55:10,492
That sounds so familiar. Are you a cartoonist?

974
00:55:10,492 --> 00:55:13,537
No, I'm... I'm...

975
00:55:13,537 --> 00:55:14,747
I'm a writer.

976
00:55:15,706 --> 00:55:16,791
Would I have read any of your work?

977
00:55:16,791 --> 00:55:18,668
Wrote a piece for the New Yorker a few years back.

978
00:55:20,504 --> 00:55:22,880
What was it about?

979
00:55:22,880 --> 00:55:24,174
It was about a guy with HPV.

980
00:55:24,174 --> 00:55:26,884
Not-not me. It was a work of fiction.

981
00:55:28,471 --> 00:55:30,557
What, uh, what brings you to the salon?

982
00:55:32,351 --> 00:55:35,896
I like going where I'm unexpected. But...

983
00:55:35,896 --> 00:55:39,692
To be honest, I'm regretting my decision. It's so boring.

984
00:55:39,984 --> 00:55:43,904
That Windbad guy, more like Wind bag.

985
00:55:43,904 --> 00:55:46,534
Yes!

986
00:55:46,534 --> 00:55:47,576
I don't know how he dare call himself a writer.

987
00:55:47,576 --> 00:55:49,078
-He was garbage. -Oh, so unbearable.

988
00:55:49,078 --> 00:55:51,206
Can't believe we all clapped for him.

989
00:55:51,206 --> 00:55:53,583
Is Jordan with you tonight?

990
00:55:55,961 --> 00:55:58,047
No.

991
00:55:59,173 --> 00:56:00,133
He left me this morning.

992
00:56:00,133 --> 00:56:03,178
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't... I shouldn't have pried.

993
00:56:03,178 --> 00:56:06,306
He said he can't handle my moods.

994
00:56:06,306 --> 00:56:08,393
I suppose it's for the best.

995
00:56:08,393 --> 00:56:10,103
Gives me a new mantra to live by.

996
00:56:10,103 --> 00:56:12,021
Oh, what's that?

997
00:56:12,021 --> 00:56:13,691
Fuck everybody.

998
00:56:14,023 --> 00:56:15,192
Nice.

999
00:56:17,278 --> 00:56:18,195
Some men can't handle a strong woman.

1000
00:56:18,195 --> 00:56:20,947
You're married to Jennifer, so, I guess it's not a problem for you.

1001
00:56:23,410 --> 00:56:25,162
Uh, no.

1002
00:56:26,706 --> 00:56:27,790
You like strong women?

1003
00:56:27,790 --> 00:56:29,208
-Sure, yeah. I guess so. -Good.

1004
00:56:34,631 --> 00:56:36,175
Excuse me for a moment. It's business.

1005
00:56:37,510 --> 00:56:39,970
Sure.

1006
00:56:39,970 --> 00:56:41,473
Hey.

1007
00:56:42,933 --> 00:56:43,934
You want a top up?

1008
00:56:44,727 --> 00:56:46,020
Sure. Yeah.

1009
00:56:46,020 --> 00:56:47,731
No, I told you.

1010
00:56:47,731 --> 00:56:50,692
No one wants to read a novel about strange trans-animals.

1011
00:56:50,692 --> 00:56:51,067
Thanks.

1012
00:56:53,986 --> 00:56:55,280
 I'm in the middle of something. Call me tomorrow.

1013
00:56:55,280 --> 00:56:58,034
Oh! Sorry about that. It's James Franco.

1014
00:56:58,034 --> 00:57:01,204
That cunt drives me insane.

1015
00:57:01,204 --> 00:57:03,332
 Yeah.

1016
00:57:03,875 --> 00:57:05,250
So, are you reading anything tonight?

1017
00:57:05,250 --> 00:57:07,587
No, I decided not to read anything.

1018
00:57:08,338 --> 00:57:11,006
Oh, that's too bad.

1019
00:57:11,006 --> 00:57:12,927
If you're not reading anything, why are you here?

1020
00:57:13,134 --> 00:57:15,638
[sighing] Jennifer.

1021
00:57:16,680 --> 00:57:17,933
And where is Jennifer?

1022
00:57:19,015 --> 00:57:20,644
I don't-- I have no idea.

1023
00:57:24,314 --> 00:57:28,069
You know what, I should... I should put this down.

1024
00:57:28,069 --> 00:57:30,822
Why?

1025
00:57:30,822 --> 00:57:32,533
I'm starting to just feel a little dizzy.

1026
00:57:32,866 --> 00:57:35,828
Vertigo?

1027
00:57:36,035 --> 00:57:37,330
Something like that.

1028
00:57:37,914 --> 00:57:40,040
I think I have something that might help.

1029
00:57:43,254 --> 00:57:46,716
Meet me out back.

1030
00:58:21,381 --> 00:58:24,635
David.

1031
00:58:24,635 --> 00:58:26,387
Oh, no. I didn't really want to smoke weed.

1032
00:58:26,387 --> 00:58:29,097
I-I just needed to get out of that place.

1033
00:58:33,228 --> 00:58:36,733
Let's play a game.

1034
00:58:36,733 --> 00:58:38,359
Oh, okay. What kind of game?

1035
00:58:39,319 --> 00:58:41,989
The getting to know you game.

1036
00:58:41,989 --> 00:58:44,115
I'm gonna ask you a question.

1037
00:58:44,115 --> 00:58:46,036
And you have to answer it.

1038
00:58:46,036 --> 00:58:47,704
No matter what.

1039
00:58:48,119 --> 00:58:49,706
Okay, shoot.

1040
00:58:51,123 --> 00:58:52,584
What's the kinkiest thing you've ever done?

1041
00:58:56,339 --> 00:58:57,465
-Like sexually? -Yes.

1042
00:59:01,637 --> 00:59:02,262
Uh-huh.

1043
00:59:06,266 --> 00:59:10,145
I once had sex in a botanical garden.

1044
00:59:11,356 --> 00:59:13,317
I have really bad allergies

1045
00:59:15,070 --> 00:59:16,152
and the pollen count was really high.

1046
00:59:16,152 --> 00:59:18,154
So I just sneezed through the whole thing.

1047
00:59:18,154 --> 00:59:21,242
I, it was actually pretty awful.

1048
00:59:22,787 --> 00:59:24,038
Yeah. What about you?

1049
00:59:28,043 --> 00:59:31,171
Have you ever heard of erotic asphyxiation?

1050
00:59:33,465 --> 00:59:35,300
That's like when people strangle themselves to, like, masturbate?

1051
00:59:39,807 --> 00:59:43,185
I didn't say auto-erotic.

1052
00:59:43,185 --> 00:59:45,437
I would never do it alone. That's just obscene.

1053
00:59:46,438 --> 00:59:48,525
All right, uh...

1054
00:59:49,859 --> 00:59:51,444
You win for kinkiest thing.

1055
00:59:51,444 --> 00:59:53,948
You should try it.

1056
00:59:56,076 --> 00:59:58,201
I... I don't think so. It sounds pretty terrifying to me.

1057
00:59:58,411 --> 01:00:02,206
It's not, if you really trust the person.

1058
01:00:03,084 --> 01:00:05,210
Okay.

1059
01:00:08,339 --> 01:00:11,552
So,

1060
01:00:11,552 --> 01:00:12,845
tell me about this book you're trying to get published.

1061
01:00:12,845 --> 01:00:16,850
How'd... How'd you know I was trying to get a book published?

1062
01:00:16,850 --> 01:00:19,186
You have that look.

1063
01:00:20,062 --> 01:00:21,229
What look?

1064
01:00:23,107 --> 01:00:24,232
The... sad puppy look.

1065
01:00:24,232 --> 01:00:27,738
The look of desperation and hunger.

1066
01:00:27,738 --> 01:00:30,365
I know it well.

1067
01:00:30,365 --> 01:00:31,908
Sorry.

1068
01:00:33,077 --> 01:00:34,203
Don't apologize.

1069
01:00:34,203 --> 01:00:35,913
Hunger is good.

1070
01:00:36,706 --> 01:00:38,666
You what your problem is, David?

1071
01:00:40,418 --> 01:00:42,254
That I don't have a last name that's a metal?

1072
01:00:42,254 --> 01:00:45,675
You're completely overshadowed by your wife.

1073
01:00:46,009 --> 01:00:48,511
She has more heat.

1074
01:00:49,262 --> 01:00:50,973
As long as you're with her,

1075
01:00:51,514 --> 01:00:52,933
you'll always be known as J.M. Lee's husband.

1076
01:00:52,933 --> 01:00:56,269
Doesn't matter how many novels you write.

1077
01:00:56,269 --> 01:00:59,272
I don't... I don't think that's true.

1078
01:00:59,272 --> 01:01:01,275
Believe me.

1079
01:01:01,275 --> 01:01:02,736
There's not enough room in one relationship for two artists.

1080
01:01:03,361 --> 01:01:06,908
One always suffers.

1081
01:01:06,908 --> 01:01:08,618
I don't... I don't see it that way.

1082
01:01:12,831 --> 01:01:16,292
I have an idea.

1083
01:01:16,292 --> 01:01:17,796
-Let's go skinny dipping. -What?

1084
01:01:18,713 --> 01:01:20,132
-Oh, no. -Come on.

1085
01:01:22,218 --> 01:01:24,262
No. What are you doing?

1086
01:01:24,262 --> 01:01:25,889
-Put your clothes on. -Let's go skinny dipping.

1087
01:01:25,889 --> 01:01:27,515
-No! People can see. -No, they can't.

1088
01:01:27,515 --> 01:01:29,810
-It will be fine. - Those windows are open.

1089
01:01:29,810 --> 01:01:32,230
-I don't want to do it alone. - Stop that.

1090
01:01:33,689 --> 01:01:34,649
All right. Now you're having fun, right?

1091
01:01:37,485 --> 01:01:39,279
- No, no. -David, don't be a baby.

1092
01:01:39,279 --> 01:01:42,200
 Leave me alone.

1093
01:01:44,326 --> 01:01:47,705
Whoo. Yeah.

1094
01:01:52,169 --> 01:01:54,046
Yeah.

1095
01:01:55,006 --> 01:01:56,216
Why did you do that?

1096
01:01:56,216 --> 01:01:57,340
-Isn't this great? -No!

1097
01:01:57,340 --> 01:01:59,761
I'm soaked.

1098
01:01:59,761 --> 01:02:00,637
So, you'll dry off. Relax. Enjoy it.

1099
01:02:00,637 --> 01:02:03,431
My phone.

1100
01:02:03,975 --> 01:02:07,352
Well, how was I supposed to know you had a phone in your pocket. I thought you were just happy to see me.

1101
01:02:09,022 --> 01:02:10,148
It's not turning on.

1102
01:02:10,148 --> 01:02:11,357
Oh, calm down. I'll get you a new one.

1103
01:02:11,357 --> 01:02:13,194
No. I'm expecting a call.

1104
01:02:13,194 --> 01:02:16,362
Drop it in a bag of rice. It will dry out.

1105
01:02:17,240 --> 01:02:18,700
Come on! Come back!

1106
01:02:20,535 --> 01:02:22,370
David.

1107
01:02:23,622 --> 01:02:24,790
Come back!

1108
01:02:25,791 --> 01:02:26,751
I miss you.

1109
01:02:37,680 --> 01:02:41,518
[man on voice message] You have reached

1110
01:02:41,518 --> 01:02:43,021
the voicemail box of David Warwik.

1111
01:02:49,862 --> 01:02:53,782
Hi. Can I have a number for a taxi company?

1112
01:03:02,710 --> 01:03:03,878
I'm sorry.

1113
01:03:05,213 --> 01:03:06,381
So I see you had the Sawyer experience.

1114
01:03:06,381 --> 01:03:09,051
Don't worry. She does this every year.

1115
01:03:20,521 --> 01:03:23,817
Uh, fuck.

1116
01:03:23,817 --> 01:03:25,278
Can I have the phone number for the police department?

1117
01:03:32,954 --> 01:03:37,084
Police Department. Chucky speaking. How may I direct your call?

1118
01:03:37,084 --> 01:03:40,128
Yeah. I need to speak to Officer McDannel.

1119
01:03:40,128 --> 01:03:43,257
Who's calling?

1120
01:03:43,257 --> 01:03:44,634
My name is David Warwik.

1121
01:03:44,634 --> 01:03:46,345
Hey, aren't you the guy who lost his wife at the Quik Mart?

1122
01:03:46,345 --> 01:03:48,763
Yes. Yes. That's me.

1123
01:03:48,763 --> 01:03:50,472
Oh, I know all about you.

1124
01:03:50,472 --> 01:03:53,102
I've been reading your wife's book.

1125
01:03:53,102 --> 01:03:54,812
Great. Have you found Jennifer?

1126
01:03:54,812 --> 01:03:57,107
No, they still haven't found her.

1127
01:03:57,107 --> 01:03:58,775
But to be honest, I don't think they are looking that hard.

1128
01:03:58,775 --> 01:04:01,653
-What? -It's a code yellow.

1129
01:04:01,653 --> 01:04:04,489
What is a code yellow?

1130
01:04:04,489 --> 01:04:05,950
It's really not a priority.

1131
01:04:05,950 --> 01:04:08,493
It's the code that we give people who lose their ATM cards.

1132
01:04:08,493 --> 01:04:12,125
But I'll let them know that you're still looking for her.

1133
01:04:12,125 --> 01:04:15,003
Yes, I'm still looking for her.

1134
01:04:15,003 --> 01:04:17,297
Hey, can I ask you a question?

1135
01:04:17,297 --> 01:04:18,882
-Is it about Jennifer? -Sort of.

1136
01:04:18,882 --> 01:04:21,509
In the book,

1137
01:04:21,509 --> 01:04:22,886
are Julie and Derrick ghosts?

1138
01:04:22,886 --> 01:04:25,265
What the fuck?

1139
01:04:35,901 --> 01:04:39,529
I have no idea what he's saying.

1140
01:04:39,529 --> 01:04:42,243
But it's beautiful.

1141
01:04:47,291 --> 01:04:48,959
One second.

1142
01:04:48,959 --> 01:04:50,377
May I come in? I'd like to apologize.

1143
01:04:53,714 --> 01:04:55,632
Sure.

1144
01:04:56,968 --> 01:04:58,304
I'm sorry I pushed you in the pool.

1145
01:04:59,721 --> 01:05:02,808
It's just one of those things I can't resist.

1146
01:05:02,808 --> 01:05:05,353
It's like popcorn or marshmallows or cocaine.

1147
01:05:05,353 --> 01:05:08,564
Do you happen to have any?

1148
01:05:08,564 --> 01:05:09,649
No.

1149
01:05:12,445 --> 01:05:15,823
What's with that beard?

1150
01:05:15,823 --> 01:05:18,118
What about it?

1151
01:05:18,575 --> 01:05:19,828
I think beards are about men not wanting to be seen.

1152
01:05:19,995 --> 01:05:23,791
You're looking for something to hide behind.

1153
01:05:24,209 --> 01:05:26,127
No, I'm not.

1154
01:05:27,586 --> 01:05:29,131
Yes, you are. You're hiding behind that beard.

1155
01:05:30,091 --> 01:05:33,928
No, it's just a beard. It's not that important.

1156
01:05:33,928 --> 01:05:36,680
-You're hiding. -You're being ridiculous.

1157
01:05:36,680 --> 01:05:38,934
If it's so ridiculous, then shave it off.

1158
01:05:38,934 --> 01:05:41,686
-No. -Why not?

1159
01:05:41,686 --> 01:05:43,439
Reveal yourself.

1160
01:05:43,439 --> 01:05:44,899
There's nothing to reveal. It's just a beard.

1161
01:05:44,899 --> 01:05:47,319
You just said it's not important. Why don't you prove it?

1162
01:05:47,319 --> 01:05:50,532
Shave that shit off.

1163
01:05:50,532 --> 01:05:54,035
No! I, uh... I don't even have a razor.

1164
01:06:00,918 --> 01:06:04,297
Here we are.

1165
01:06:04,297 --> 01:06:05,298
You're serious. No. I'm not doing this.

1166
01:06:09,219 --> 01:06:12,431
I'll make you a deal.

1167
01:06:12,431 --> 01:06:13,766
You shave off your beard,

1168
01:06:14,641 --> 01:06:16,644
and I promise, I'll help you publish your book.

1169
01:06:18,147 --> 01:06:20,232
Send it to me when it's ready

1170
01:06:21,733 --> 01:06:23,111
and I'll send it out to all best houses.

1171
01:06:23,111 --> 01:06:25,697
But you don't even know what it's about.

1172
01:06:26,656 --> 01:06:28,992
So,

1173
01:06:28,992 --> 01:06:30,244
tell me about it.

1174
01:06:30,659 --> 01:06:32,204
What's it about?

1175
01:06:33,080 --> 01:06:34,457
Okay. It's...

1176
01:06:36,501 --> 01:06:39,171
a coming-of-age, uh, tale about a...

1177
01:06:40,590 --> 01:06:43,551
It takes place in 1980s.

1178
01:06:43,926 --> 01:06:45,677
-That sounds brilliant. -It does?

1179
01:06:45,677 --> 01:06:47,346
Yes. Send me a copy when it's ready.

1180
01:06:47,346 --> 01:06:50,683
-Really? -Definitely.

1181
01:06:50,683 --> 01:06:53,104
I'll sell the shit out of it.

1182
01:06:53,104 --> 01:06:55,148
But you haven't even read it.

1183
01:06:55,148 --> 01:06:57,150
So?

1184
01:06:57,691 --> 01:06:58,986
You might not like it.

1185
01:06:59,694 --> 01:07:01,197
That doesn't matter.

1186
01:07:02,657 --> 01:07:04,576
David, I've sold horrible work.

1187
01:07:04,742 --> 01:07:08,456
Like, truly terrible stuff.

1188
01:07:08,456 --> 01:07:10,957
Like, we should have put a warning on the book jacket,

1189
01:07:10,957 --> 01:07:14,086
It was so bad.

1190
01:07:14,086 --> 01:07:15,171
I'm sure if there's a photo of handsome,

1191
01:07:15,171 --> 01:07:18,717
charming you on the book jacket,

1192
01:07:18,717 --> 01:07:21,471
without a beard,

1193
01:07:21,471 --> 01:07:23,598
we will be able to sell your work.

1194
01:07:27,894 --> 01:07:31,440
So what do you say?

1195
01:07:32,525 --> 01:07:34,319
I don't understand why you can get an egg white omelet

1196
01:07:34,319 --> 01:07:36,737
when you can't get an egg yolk omelet.

1197
01:07:36,737 --> 01:07:38,240
Oh, excuse me. Hi.

1198
01:07:38,240 --> 01:07:40,451
Hey.

1199
01:07:40,451 --> 01:07:41,577
Hey.

1200
01:07:41,577 --> 01:07:43,037
-Remember? I... -You're J.M. Lee.

1201
01:07:43,037 --> 01:07:44,913
-Yeah. From before. -Yeah.

1202
01:07:44,913 --> 01:07:47,084
We were reading your book.

1203
01:07:47,084 --> 01:07:48,752
-What? Oh, okay. -Yeah.

1204
01:07:48,752 --> 01:07:50,753
Your husband's looking for you.

1205
01:07:50,753 --> 01:07:51,880
Yes! I've been waiting for like an hour.

1206
01:07:51,880 --> 01:07:54,384
I can't get a cab. Can you give me a ride?

1207
01:08:36,308 --> 01:08:39,645
Can I try?

1208
01:08:39,645 --> 01:08:40,688
Have you ever shaved a guy before?

1209
01:08:42,356 --> 01:08:44,942
Of course.

1210
01:08:46,987 --> 01:08:48,529
Trust me.

1211
01:09:18,691 --> 01:09:22,153
Hey, what are you doing? No.

1212
01:09:22,153 --> 01:09:23,862
-Trust me. -Stop it! No!

1213
01:09:23,862 --> 01:09:24,947
You should trust me. It's how you play.

1214
01:09:24,947 --> 01:09:26,825
You're fucking crazy.

1215
01:09:26,825 --> 01:09:27,993
David.

1216
01:09:28,868 --> 01:09:30,203
You didn't finish shaving.

1217
01:09:30,203 --> 01:09:31,955
Hey, do you want us to turn on the siren?

1218
01:09:32,872 --> 01:09:34,835
-We can turn on the lights, we can turn on the siren. -No, that's okay.

1219
01:09:34,835 --> 01:09:36,711
I've seen them before.

1220
01:09:36,711 --> 01:09:38,962
No, I'll do it. I'll do it real quick.-It's great. -Watch this, watch this.

1221
01:09:38,962 --> 01:09:40,881
Hey.

1222
01:09:40,881 --> 01:09:43,135
Right? Everyone's clearing the way.

1223
01:09:43,135 --> 01:09:44,886
-Watch out. -Here we go.

1224
01:09:44,886 --> 01:09:46,515
Author coming through. Author coming through. Watch them clear out.

1225
01:09:46,515 --> 01:09:48,975
Watch them clear out.

1226
01:09:48,975 --> 01:09:50,227
I'm wondering if I could sculpt with meat.

1227
01:09:50,227 --> 01:09:52,815
Absolutely.

1228
01:09:52,815 --> 01:09:53,981
I feel like it would bind really well.

1229
01:09:53,981 --> 01:09:56,527
The moma would take it.

1230
01:09:56,527 --> 01:09:58,195
And when it rots, it will sort of, you know, get a little mulch.

1231
01:10:01,491 --> 01:10:02,826
Do you think that's part of the performance piece?

1232
01:10:04,952 --> 01:10:07,623
Interesting.

1233
01:10:10,584 --> 01:10:13,921
What happened to you?

1234
01:10:13,921 --> 01:10:15,507
You know, we're usually in the Hamptons this time of the year,

1235
01:10:16,924 --> 01:10:18,845
but the traffic is awful.

1236
01:10:18,845 --> 01:10:20,137
-Tell me more about your face in this... -Look at mine.

1237
01:10:20,137 --> 01:10:22,014
Oh, the man is brilliant.

1238
01:10:22,014 --> 01:10:23,932
The novel's calledTrash. It's about a guy named Travis and guy named Ash.

1239
01:10:23,932 --> 01:10:26,978
You need a whitening session.

1240
01:10:26,978 --> 01:10:28,605
Is there anyone who would like to read or perform up here?

1241
01:10:28,605 --> 01:10:32,151
-Uh, he hasn't gone. -Yes. Him.

1242
01:10:32,151 --> 01:10:34,487
David, is everything all right?

1243
01:10:35,071 --> 01:10:36,948
What did you do to your beard?

1244
01:10:36,948 --> 01:10:38,992
-I shaved-- -It's part of his piece.

1245
01:10:41,954 --> 01:10:43,457
Okay, everyone.

1246
01:10:45,417 --> 01:10:47,002
We know his wife very well.

1247
01:10:47,002 --> 01:10:48,961
The astounding novelist J.M. Lee.

1248
01:10:48,961 --> 01:10:51,965
It turns out that her husband also writes.

1249
01:10:51,965 --> 01:10:54,010
Please welcome David Lee.

1250
01:11:03,313 --> 01:11:06,734
Thank you. Uh...

1251
01:11:06,734 --> 01:11:07,984
Actually it's not David Lee.

1252
01:11:07,984 --> 01:11:11,988
It's David Warwik. J.M. Lee is my wife.

1253
01:11:12,072 --> 01:11:15,744
Uh, it's a common mistake.

1254
01:11:15,744 --> 01:11:20,999
Jennifer and I are really honored to be invited to this artist salon.You know, to spend time with all of you artists.

1255
01:11:20,999 --> 01:11:24,002
Uh, we drove up here

1256
01:11:24,378 --> 01:11:27,132
and we got into an argument

1257
01:11:28,007 --> 01:11:30,009
because I forgot to bring the wine.

1258
01:11:30,009 --> 01:11:33,013
You know, it's one of those arguments where

1259
01:11:33,013 --> 01:11:35,141
you're talking about one thing

1260
01:11:36,016 --> 01:11:37,645
but you actually are arguing about something totally different.

1261
01:11:37,645 --> 01:11:39,355
And we've just been really kind of distant with each other.

1262
01:11:39,355 --> 01:11:43,067
Like, we haven't had sex in forever.

1263
01:11:43,067 --> 01:11:46,028
So, on the ride up,

1264
01:11:46,028 --> 01:11:47,573
we decided to pull over and have sex in the car.

1265
01:11:48,240 --> 01:11:52,036
But the police came, and they stopped us,

1266
01:11:52,036 --> 01:11:55,999
and they called me Roadfucker,

1267
01:11:55,999 --> 01:11:57,626
which was unfortunate.

1268
01:11:57,626 --> 01:11:59,043
So, once we pulled into Greenwich,

1269
01:11:59,043 --> 01:12:00,463
that's when we learnt that you can't buy wine

1270
01:12:00,463 --> 01:12:03,299
in Greenwich on a Sunday.

1271
01:12:03,299 --> 01:12:04,927
Not after 5:00.

1272
01:12:04,927 --> 01:12:06,094
Right. Yes. So...

1273
01:12:06,094 --> 01:12:08,053
We then drove back to New York,

1274
01:12:08,053 --> 01:12:10,099
we saw a convenience store like a Quick Mart,

1275
01:12:10,099 --> 01:12:12,811
and I saw some wine that was like a wine product

1276
01:12:12,811 --> 01:12:16,691
which I didn't even know that a the thing,

1277
01:12:16,691 --> 01:12:18,442
So, I was like let's just get this. It's cheap, it's fine.

1278
01:12:18,442 --> 01:12:22,070
And she got mad and then she left.

1279
01:12:22,070 --> 01:12:25,073
She just stormed out.

1280
01:12:25,073 --> 01:12:26,827
And the thing about Jennifer, is that Jennifer doesn't own a cell phone.

1281
01:12:26,827 --> 01:12:29,998
She doesn't believe in 'em, which... that's great for her.

1282
01:12:29,998 --> 01:12:33,376
But it means that I don't know how to get in touch with her.

1283
01:12:33,376 --> 01:12:35,754
And I got really worried.

1284
01:12:35,754 --> 01:12:39,592
And the police, they told me it was probably okay. And he told me that I should come here.

1285
01:12:39,592 --> 01:12:41,761
And that she'd probably show up and she hasn't.

1286
01:12:41,761 --> 01:12:44,264
And I called the cops.

1287
01:12:44,264 --> 01:12:45,891
And they're not even looking for her. At all.

1288
01:12:45,891 --> 01:12:49,729
And instead of finding her myself or trying,

1289
01:12:49,895 --> 01:12:53,942
I had to spend my whole evening with you assholes.

1290
01:12:58,781 --> 01:13:01,993
You!

1291
01:13:01,993 --> 01:13:03,161
You're a handsome dilettante.

1292
01:13:03,161 --> 01:13:05,956
And if I had to spend any time

1293
01:13:05,956 --> 01:13:08,292
in Italian monastery with you,

1294
01:13:08,292 --> 01:13:10,377
I would murder myself and I'd pin it on you.

1295
01:13:11,755 --> 01:13:14,633
And then you!

1296
01:13:15,132 --> 01:13:16,384
You are a monk with some serious mommy issues, man.

1297
01:13:16,384 --> 01:13:20,098
Like, you really need to stop projecting through your art.

1298
01:13:20,098 --> 01:13:23,267
You put boobs over everything.

1299
01:13:23,267 --> 01:13:24,645
Get it checked out. Talk to somebody.

1300
01:13:24,645 --> 01:13:26,981
Start a podcast or something.

1301
01:13:26,981 --> 01:13:28,816
And you!

1302
01:13:28,816 --> 01:13:30,818
You're... You're a dentist. But you know what?

1303
01:13:31,027 --> 01:13:33,947
Your book idea...

1304
01:13:34,238 --> 01:13:36,992
it's ten times better than anything Eric Windbag could come up with.

1305
01:13:37,910 --> 01:13:41,539
-Thank you. -That's... It's Windbed.

1306
01:13:41,539 --> 01:13:44,417
I know.

1307
01:13:44,417 --> 01:13:45,710
And you know what, you're right.

1308
01:13:45,710 --> 01:13:47,463
I probably do need a teeth whitening.

1309
01:13:47,463 --> 01:13:50,173
-Call me. -I will. Thank you.

1310
01:13:50,173 --> 01:13:52,385
And you. You, sir. You're a critic.

1311
01:13:52,803 --> 01:13:56,556
And, oh, you think you know everything.

1312
01:13:56,556 --> 01:13:58,851
Oh, I should change my name to something metal-sounding

1313
01:13:58,851 --> 01:14:02,187
because that will move books?

1314
01:14:02,187 --> 01:14:04,189
Fuck you, man.

1315
01:14:04,189 --> 01:14:06,527
And you, Charles.

1316
01:14:07,027 --> 01:14:09,195
So, good to see you, buddy.

1317
01:14:09,195 --> 01:14:11,197
Look at you, the big successful book editor

1318
01:14:11,197 --> 01:14:13,994
who just gets off on tearing other people down

1319
01:14:13,994 --> 01:14:17,204
because you were never a writer.

1320
01:14:17,204 --> 01:14:19,126
You never cared about writing.

1321
01:14:19,126 --> 01:14:20,668
And you, this woman. Be careful of this woman.

1322
01:14:21,377 --> 01:14:25,174
You're like a nympho lit-agent.

1323
01:14:25,174 --> 01:14:27,592
She tried to choke me, and all of this,

1324
01:14:27,592 --> 01:14:30,430
I didn't do, that's her.

1325
01:14:30,596 --> 01:14:32,182
And you,

1326
01:14:33,851 --> 01:14:34,934
you were amazing, man.

1327
01:14:36,145 --> 01:14:38,689
You were great. It was beautiful.

1328
01:14:38,689 --> 01:14:41,232
Thank you.

1329
01:14:41,232 --> 01:14:42,360
And Lily and Bernard, this place is the shit.

1330
01:14:43,154 --> 01:14:46,866
That pool, under different circumstances,

1331
01:14:46,866 --> 01:14:49,952
would have been a great time.

1332
01:14:49,952 --> 01:14:51,579
I was honestly so...

1333
01:14:53,999 --> 01:14:56,752
nervous about coming here

1334
01:14:57,377 --> 01:14:59,714
and trying to impress you people.

1335
01:14:59,714 --> 01:15:01,883
And at the end of the day, I don't give a shit.

1336
01:15:01,883 --> 01:15:04,259
I don't give a shit about what you all think about me, 'cause it doesn't matter.

1337
01:15:04,259 --> 01:15:07,263
I don't care if you read my writing, or if you like my writing,

1338
01:15:07,263 --> 01:15:10,266
because I didn't write it for any of you.

1339
01:15:10,266 --> 01:15:13,189
I wrote it for myself.

1340
01:15:13,189 --> 01:15:15,191
And that's all it matters. If at the end of the day,

1341
01:15:15,191 --> 01:15:17,985
all I am, is just J.M. Lee's husband.

1342
01:15:19,028 --> 01:15:22,280
That's fine,

1343
01:15:22,280 --> 01:15:24,283
As long as I get to write, that's all I care about.

1344
01:15:28,915 --> 01:15:32,211
Jennifer.

1345
01:15:33,754 --> 01:15:36,965
Hi.

1346
01:15:36,965 --> 01:15:38,425
I brought wine.

1347
01:15:39,928 --> 01:15:42,055
It's... a Pinot noir.

1348
01:15:42,055 --> 01:15:44,724
This is... this is a lovely, lovely home.

1349
01:16:03,496 --> 01:16:05,207
I'm so sorry.

1350
01:16:18,889 --> 01:16:22,143
What?

1351
01:16:22,143 --> 01:16:23,352
I read your book.

1352
01:16:23,937 --> 01:16:24,980
And?

1353
01:16:27,149 --> 01:16:28,357
It's terrible.

1354
01:16:45,087 --> 01:16:48,967
Hello. If everyone would please take their seats.

1355
01:16:48,967 --> 01:16:52,345
We're about to start the reading.

1356
01:16:52,345 --> 01:16:53,638
Thank you.

1357
01:16:55,389 --> 01:16:56,684
Please help me in welcoming tonight's author

1358
01:16:56,684 --> 01:16:59,437
David Warwik.

1359
01:17:07,864 --> 01:17:11,200
Thank you.

1360
01:17:11,200 --> 01:17:12,619
Um, this is from my first novel,

1361
01:17:12,785 --> 01:17:16,290
Orange Summer.

1362
01:17:27,178 --> 01:17:30,765
-Thanks. -Thank you for coming.

1363
01:17:47,451 --> 01:17:51,498
♪ Oh, I'd wish You'd wear that dress ♪

1364
01:17:51,498 --> 01:17:54,919
♪ Going back because I don't know where it was ♪

1365
01:17:54,919 --> 01:17:58,463
♪ But I know that ♪

1366
01:17:59,048 --> 01:18:00,633
♪ You're the one ♪

1367
01:18:02,468 --> 01:18:06,057
♪ A week across the country In our beat up truck ♪

1368
01:18:06,057 --> 01:18:09,476
♪ Stopping every minute 'Cause the thing don't run ♪

1369
01:18:09,476 --> 01:18:12,855
♪ But I don't care ♪

1370
01:18:12,855 --> 01:18:15,234
♪ 'Cause we're in love ♪

1371
01:18:17,027 --> 01:18:20,782
♪ Let's getLet's get away in the night ♪

1372
01:18:24,954 --> 01:18:27,873
♪ I know you count on me ♪

1373
01:18:28,541 --> 01:18:30,751
♪ Well just lean on me Lean on me every time ♪

1374
01:18:45,769 --> 01:18:49,816
♪ Made it to eternity And about to erase ♪

1375
01:18:49,816 --> 01:18:53,527
♪ Looking through our hopes ♪

1376
01:18:53,527 --> 01:18:54,989
♪ Saying you're proud Of your sins ♪

1377
01:18:54,989 --> 01:18:56,741
♪ And we've been there ♪

1378
01:18:56,907 --> 01:18:59,577
♪ We'll make it right ♪

1379
01:19:00,535 --> 01:19:04,500
♪ Rounding up the cattle And the bales of hay ♪

1380
01:19:04,500 --> 01:19:08,129
♪ Days are kind of slow, That's our time to praise ♪

1381
01:19:08,129 --> 01:19:11,548
♪ And you stay there ♪

1382
01:19:11,548 --> 01:19:14,470
♪ Lovin', lovin', Lovin', lovin ♪

1383
01:19:16,055 --> 01:19:19,809
♪ Let's getLet's get away in the night ♪

1384
01:19:23,314 --> 01:19:27,068
♪ Let's getLet's get away in the night ♪

1385
01:19:30,570 --> 01:19:34,452
♪ Let's getLet's get away in the night ♪

1386
01:19:38,206 --> 01:19:39,957
♪ I know you count on me ♪

1387
01:19:41,793 --> 01:19:44,587
♪ Well, just lean on me, Lean on me every time ♪

1388
01:20:26,555 --> 01:20:30,433
They know book club meets every Tuesday at 4:30.

1389
01:20:30,433 --> 01:20:33,186
Every Tuesday, 4:30.

1390
01:20:33,186 --> 01:20:35,189
They'll be here.

1391
01:20:35,189 --> 01:20:36,566
I got a signed book, I got a notebook full of notes.

1392
01:20:36,566 --> 01:20:38,568
Jealous.

1393
01:20:39,651 --> 01:20:41,280
It's rude.

1394
01:20:41,280 --> 01:20:42,654
I've read this book five times.

1395
01:20:42,654 --> 01:20:44,657
I've had conversations with the author.

1396
01:20:44,657 --> 01:20:46,869
I know the book.

1397
01:20:47,327 --> 01:20:48,496
And they know I know the book.

1398
01:20:51,625 --> 01:20:55,087
You know, when DeMarco was all excited about that Tony Morrison thing,

1399
01:20:55,296 --> 01:20:58,673
we all came.

1400
01:20:58,673 --> 01:20:59,717
Hey, Patterson,

1401
01:21:00,510 --> 01:21:01,803
uh, me and Dressler are here at book club.

1402
01:21:01,803 --> 01:21:04,680
Uh, wonder if you're coming tonight.

1403
01:21:04,680 --> 01:21:06,726
Patty at the drop office kid had a soccer game.

1404
01:21:06,726 --> 01:21:08,936
- Bullshit - She's coming.

1405
01:21:08,936 --> 01:21:11,231
Bullshit.

1406
01:21:12,566 --> 01:21:14,611
It's unbelievable. It's like, there's no... No sense of etiquette.

1407
01:21:14,611 --> 01:21:18,448
This is like, this is like the breakdown of society.

1408
01:21:19,575 --> 01:21:21,660
She's got talent.

1409
01:21:22,785 --> 01:21:24,246
Her husband's a deadbeat, though.

1410
01:21:25,000 --> 01:21:42,000
Farid Morocco